Alrighty...I had to do a lot of thinking, on this, but here's my best shot. I hope that it is what you were looking for!
Hey Nicky-
I know this might seem a bit odd, to you, but I was granted permission to contact you. Don’t ask me how I pulled it off…because you know I ain’t got a clue! Doesn’t THAT remind you of our early Backstreet years? We always scored extra breaks and special treatment…but never understood how we managed to do it. Anyways…that’s not what this letter is for.
I’ve seen you be, way too, hard on yourself these past 6 1/2 years. Man, I can’t even believe that it’s been that long! You’ve been second guessing yourself, Nick, and that’s something I never wanted you to do. I know that our accident, and gaining Baylee’s custody, sent a shockwave through your life. I’d say that I’m sorry…but the truth, of the matter, is that I’m not sorry, in the least. I was confident in my choice then, and I still am, now.
You and Baylee have been through a lot, over the years, and you’ve never bailed, on him. I’m very proud of how Baylee has grown up and matured. Sure, he’s a little brat, sometimes, but, if you recall…you were quite the little brat, yourself! Don’t get me wrong…I wouldn’t condone some of the things that he’s done or said…but, overall and aside from your language, I think you’ve handled it all pretty well.
You need to loosen up, though, Nick. Maybe you don’t see it…but, sometimes his attitude stems from you being so uptight and over protective. Now, I appreciate you taking care of my boy and protecting him as best as you can, but, like you told Kevin, I never wanted you to turn into him…he’s a kill joy. Please go back to your old self, because it would make things a lot easier and much happier, for both of you and I bet you two wouldn’t yell, at each other, so much.
Nicky…I need you to know that I have never, once, doubted you. When I put your name, on that will, I never expected you to be perfect. You were my partner, in crime, for many years…who knew you better than I did? I didn’t take the decision lightly and even though it threw you, for a loop…you were the right choice, and I wouldn’t change it. I’m very proud of you, Nick. I have been the whole time, and it’s not about to change. Just be yourself, Nick, and you’ll always make me proud.
I love you, blondie, and I’ll always be watching over you.
- Brian