Firstly, just have to thank you all for taking the time to read my fic. And then even more thanks to you for taking the time to comment!
Starbeamz--I think the first chapter was the one that made me most nervous (except possibly chapter 8 ), so people's comments on it usually tend to surprise me. It was my first ever BSB scene, and when I started writing it, I really wasn't sure at all that I had the "characters" right at all, so I'm always relieved (lol) when people assure me that I made them believable versions of the guys. I also wasn't sure where exactly the story was going when I started writing the scene--I was really thinking that it was going to be a throwaway scene--which I write a lot of just to get the writing flowing. But then once I knew where I was going I realized that the "throwaway" scene did exactly what I needed it to do in introducing "Nick" (and set up being able to contrast the character before and after the attack), getting him isolated from the others, and of course setting up future Kevin-angst scenes. It also made me nervous thinking that the emotions of the scene were pretty much all over the map (from the very silly beginning to the extreme tension of the end of the chapter), so I really am relieved when people mention that as a more positive aspect of it. I like mixing genres that don't necessarily play nice together--especially ones like suspense and humor, or angst and humor--so thanks for letting me know that it works
![Grin ;D](http://absolutechaos.net/fictalk/Smileys/default/grin.gif)
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Felikia--Thanks for reading! I'm a big fan of stories that place the main characters in danger, too. Especially when it's my favorite character(s).
Nijntje--I really wanted to be realistic in my portrayal of Nick's PTSD. A lot of it comes from my own battle with it, so it was both easy to draw from my experience and hard to keep drawing from it. The feeling of helplessness is such a major obsticle to overcome not only because of the feeling itself, but also because of the social stigma a lot of people associate with it. There's the whole "real men aren't helpless" mentality that is driven into a lot of us pretty much from early childhood that makes it hard to reconcile if/when one can't live up to that "ideal". I agree that a lot of fics tend to have people recover from ordeals pretty much instantly, or at least in a day or two. When I picked the subject of my fic--a subject that had been done before, yes--I decided that the realistic aftermath was going to be the "new" spin that I put on it. So even when it's not always at the front of the story, "Nick's" battle with PTSD (and the others' as well) will continue on throughout the sequel. Severe cases like I inflicted on poor Nick [hangs head in shame] are often lifelong battles, even if they don't manifest every day, it's still there lurking...
Mare--Again, thanks so much for all your comments and encouragement you've given me! You know I really think that having started this fic as a non-fan really actually helped me. It made me *really* research them to get the characters right. I swear I scoured the web for every bit of information I could find about them that wasn't just "teenies" gushing. lol. It was the first time I'd written a "fanfic" where I didn't already totally "know" the characters, so I got a lot of really great experience with research that I didn't usually do a lot of since I usually "write what I know". It also somewhat helped in a way to not have any emotional ties to the characters when I started. Of course as I developed my version of the characters I got rather attached, lol. But I did my best to keep them true to how the guys represented themselves in interviews, and how fans described them (except the teenies, lol). I highly recommend sometime picking a fandom that you aren't normally part of and doing the research--it's really fascinating and great experience. Writing about what you know is great and works, but researching and writing what you *don't* know is, for me anyway, more intriguing. lol
Thanks again for taking the time to comment you guys!