This is one of my favorites!---
I don’t know what the hell it is about the stuff but spit scares the fuck out of me. I’m talking green-faced, squeamish, ready-to-hurl my guts out. Any kind of bodily fluid grosses the hell out of me. Blood, ear wax, spit, eye juice, vomit, piss… you name it, it makes me sick. This is why it pisses me off so damn much when Nick licks my face with his abnormally wide, wet, disgusting-smelling tongue. You fans, you might think this is sexy when Nick licks people, you all go gaa-gaa over the videos on YouTube, but you know what? You ain’t never been on the receiving end of that. I’m tellin’ you – IT AIN’T SEXY. Just think of this fun fact: the last time Nick brushed his teeth was probably marked down on a 2009 calendar. I’m just sayin’.
