I haven't been around here much lately so I'm behind with a lot of questions.
What's your current status as far as fanfic goes? Are you reading anything? Writing anything? Thinking about writing anything?
I've had a little bit of block, something that happens a lot to me because I tend to have a lot of ideas and I end up not writing because I don't know what to write. I guess that I needed that break because it made me miss writing so now I'm full inspired. I've posted a chapter of a story that was supposed to be a birthday gift... in summer. lol I'm bad, I know.
As for reading, in the BSB fandom I'm not reading much because, sadly, there isn't really much interesting to me. But that's so me, right? Loving a pairing a character and a genre that no one, aside me write about. So I'm reading a lot in the Sherlock fandom and, sometimes, I change the characters and I picture Brian and Nick while I'm reading. That's sad, I know. lol
Now that the year is coming to an end (Thank the lord Jesus) What are some things you learned about yourself this year that you maybe didn't realize before? Obviously this doesn't have to be totally fanfic writing or reading related but maybe try to include at least one fanfic related thing if you can.
I learned a lot last year. I really feel like I'm a totally different person, guess that losing 20 kilos does that to a person. lol Most of all, and it can be fanfiction related, I've learned that I can beat any obstacle if I set my mind on a goal. I've wanted to change and be better and I've done it, even if there had been a lot of times when I wanted to give up. And something like that happened with writing: before last year, I've thought that I would never be able to write in English, not at least at the level that I wanted. But I've tried and I think I've succed, even if I'm still really insecure about it.
Another thing is that I really really pretend too much from myself. And if it doesn't come out as I wanted (a story, a cake, whatever), I feel bad and kinda discouraged so I kinda want to leave whatever I'm doing because I think that I can't do it. This is something that I really need to work on and it's the main reason why I don't update too much or why a lot of my ideas linger in my mind because I think that they suck.
But my question is, how much do you write for yourself, and how much do you write for other people? When you're planning a story or writing a chapter, do you think about what your readers' reactions will be or how it will be received? Do you care? Does it ever influence your writing?
Obviously, I can't say that I don't care if other people read or not my stories. lol But I write first for myself. Writing is my sanity, writing is really a sort of therapy so, even if I don't post anything online, that doesn't mean I don't write. I'm always writing.
I write because I want to tell a story and, in a way, I want to entertain those crazy minds that would read my story. lol I don't particulary write thinking about what one person would react and I've noticed that if I try to please readers and try to write something that I don't like, I find myself totally demotivated and blocked.
I know that slash isn't something that a lot of people would read and it had happened that I would totally change a story so that people would read it. But I'm not able to write about Brian and Nick without the slash part (and that's the reason why I can't go on on "Battle Born"), I love, love writing them in that particulary light and I've long decided that I don't really care if only two people will read my stories.