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Do you ever feel like just packing it all in?

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MellzBellz:
I'm not sure what's been up with me lately, but in the last few months I've become more and more dissatisfied with my writing. I really have no reason to be. I've started my sequel to UMS which I've been really extremely excited about for a long time and it has a lot of potential, but I haven't been getting the same thrill from writing as I usually get. Lately I've been extremely unconfident in my writing, almost to the point of being paranoid. I feel like I've lost readers (at least ones who always reviewed haven't been reviewing yet they still review other stories) and even though I get a lot of encouraging feedback I'm always wanting more. I know... That sounds pretty selfish especially because I get a lot more feedback than a lot of other writers do so I REALLY don't mean to sound spoiled. To those of you who have worked on sequels, have you found by the 2nd story that readers disapear? Is it normal for me to feel this way?

I guess another reason I'm having doubts is as of right now my friendships with a lot of other writers have kind of fell apart. Part of the fun of writing was having friends I could discuss fics with and lately I don't feel like I have that. It's like I have very lil inspiration.

I am kind of struggling through a very tough personal time which has got me pretty down to say the least. I won't bore you with details, but basically I'm pretty depressed and I think its taking its toll on my writing.

Do any of you ever feel this way? Like you should just pack it in and stop writing? Or do you think I'm just overreacting? Have any of you ever went through something like this?

julilly:
I feel like that a lot actually. I'm pretty frustrated right now with my writing to the point that I have written and trashed the next chapter for my ongoing fic three times now. I've even quit in the past, and took two years off of writing it was almost as if it just faded away for me but then I realized I missed it, and came back to it. I think you may just need to give it some time.

honey:
aww. Mel, I think we've all been there.  I know I've been there several times and I've only been writing fanfic for about 2 years. Honestly I think feeling that way is just part of the process. Especially if you're having a rough time in your life. Our feelings are often mixed in with our writing experiences. At least mine are. I know when I'm depressed I get a hundred times more self conscious about my writing and I just can't seem to make myself want to do it anymore. If you're that stressed about it, then maybe its not such a bad idea to hang it up for a while. You can always come back to it later if you want to, but there;s no need in making yourself feel worse ya know? I myself have been debating continuing with fan fic and it was really stressing me out to a point that I just couldn't write anything. So I finally decided that I was only going to finish the two stories I'm excited about finishing and then just stick with the original stuff. Once I told myself it was ok to drop the stories that had me stressed, I felt a million times better and am enjoying the two stories I am working on. The writing HAS to be for you, because you enjoy it, otherwise you'll drive yourself crazy. 

And as for your friendships falling apart around here, are you sure that's what's happening? I don't mean this in a bad way at all, because I love ya, but it seems you've distanced yourself and not the other way around. We've hardly seen you around here at all in a long time and I know I miss you. I'll bet others do too.

Good luck Mel, with whatever you decide! I hope you feel better soon! And even if you do decide to quit writing, I hope you still stick around and chat with us every now and then.  :-*

MellzBellz:
Thanks for the advice Kelly and Julilly! Maybe your right. Maybe I need sometime to myself to take a break and write at a slower pace. I don't know if I'll commit to a complete clean break because I don't know if I can do that right now. Maybe I'll still work on my fics just not post right away. Or maybe I'll take your suggestion Kelly and fool around with some original fiction which would be totally alien to me. I'm trying to take a step back and maybe look at some writing excercises to get myself excited about writing again. I also have took breaks from writing, but I was never as serious about it as I was now. One of the last reasons I stopped writing a few years ago was partly because of backstabbing and political stuff which I haven't really experienced much this time around.

Or maybe it just is my mood. It's REALLY hard to write romance when you're depressed and thinking "Wow I'm 24 and not a man in sight." A lot of people have commented that my stories are too depressing for their taste and I notice the trend has switched to happier, more upbeat romances.  I'd love to write that way, but I'm just not in a place in my life where I can right now.

And I miss you girls too! I admit I have been distant from this forum lately. Partly because of being super busy, working all the time, but also partly because I've just felt like an outsider. I wish that I was just paranoid about friendships falling apart, but I know I'm definitely not in at least one or two cases which as partly my fault too I admit. Just since then writing has kind of left a sour taste in my mouth. Thanks for the encouragement though and we'll see what happens... I'm hoping I'm just in a mood and it'll blow over in a few days.

mare:
Mel I totally feel the same exact way which is why i'm stopping once i'm done with my two novel length stories. It's just not fun for me anymore. It feels like homework instead of fun and I do feel like people aren't as interested like they used to be. I'm sure i'll come back to it eventually but I need to feel that excitment again.

I am pretty sure like Kelly said, that this is something that everyone goes through from time to time.

Maybe if you step away from it for a little while, things will become clearer for you or maybe step away from fanfic and write something else to see if that helps. I'm sure what you're going through now probably isn't helping you to think clearly either.

Either way, best of luck and know that you aren't alone.

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