Date: 07/10/14 11:20 am Title: Chapter 9
I love that Nick was the one that figured out if he followed the furry animals (and I can't help but wonder what those furry animals are) he would find a food and water source! Yay smart Nick!
I didn't even know there was a movie Logan's Run.I was referring to the 70's show. It was really popular. If I can find a you tube link I'll tweet it to you guys. It was one of those campy. cheesy shows very Battlestar Gallactica pre sci-fi channel version. I used to watch it on the sci-fi channel I believe. Or Nick at Night? Somewhere that shows really old dramas.
Anyway, I was kind of surprised they were caught so quickly. I admit I didn't see that coming. Maybe now they'll meet up with Howie and the Luminary and decide to form a boy band! LOL Yay!!
Author's Response: Well Nick is observant at least, kind of have to be or they won't survive eh? And they caught up quickly to kind of give a sense that the Luminary and the guards are used to the terrain and likely have vehicles. ;)
Date: 07/09/14 10:01 am Title: Chapter 8
I really loved how you described something as simple as sunburn. It must be scary to someone who had never experienced anything like that before. They are very much like babies in that way, being reborn. Very creative and clever ladies.
Steph, I am assuming you wrote this chapter? Just an FYI your chapter labels are off from what you said in the thread. Meaning it says Lore wrote this one, you wrote the next one, etc...I mentioned it in the thread but I'm not sure how much you check that. Not that it really matters who wrote what outside of this challenge, but it might mess up other people who are leaving reviews, talking to the wrong person per chapter. If this is incorrect, than you have been responding to Lore's reviews and not your own. lol either way you have a very confused Mare on your hands so I'm going to continue leaving feedback on these chapters that are labeled Lore thinking it's you unless I'm told otherwise,but since you are only responding to your chapters and it looks like Lore isn't responding at all I might just start reviewing every other chapter only, so again, let me know, okay?.
As someone who doesn't really read a lot of AU, it's hard to grasp someone like Howie being a bad guy and most likely someone like Brian or Kevin being the incredibly bad guy just because it seems so out of character which I guess is the point of AU. I mean either Kevin or Brian could fit the luminary (More so Brian in my eyes) because He seems to know it all lol but yes, that's going to be hard for me to fully embrace. I am trying though and that's just a me thing. The story itself is rock solid so far. I just think I need to tackle it more as an OF and less as a BSB one.
Author's Response: Yes I suppose in a way they are like babies as everything is new to them on the outside and they're very unprepared for it.
I think we probably confused people with the chapters because we alternate but post each others chapters, so like with chapter 1, Lore wrote it but I posted it. It's because we send each other our chapter and then the person proof reading posts. It just seemed easier that way.
This is definitely AU and no sign of them breaking out into BSB songs lol, but I'm glad you're giving it a chance :)
Date: 07/08/14 09:59 am Title: Chapter 7
I'm glad they stopped beeping and glowing.
Author's Response: had to happen sometime right? they had to get power from somewhere. heh! :)
Date: 07/07/14 09:28 am Title: Chapter 6
You did a great job with your descriptions in this chapter and how neat it must have been to see all this shrubbery for the first time as well as a sunrise. Nice to know that there's a rebellion on the outside. I'm hoping that this is where we'll meet Kevin or Brian and for me personally, I'm hoping that Emma is not related to whichever BSB is out there lol
Author's Response: I know, can you imagine living in a world like that and then seeing sunlight and the beauty of the world for the first time. I hope it seemed realistic enough.
You'll have to wait and see about the others, they will turn up eventually :)
Thanks for reading (Steph)
Date: 07/06/14 09:49 am Title: Chapter 5
Glad to see they escaped. Wouldn't the guards be looking for her to? Or is she just a random runner and not really part of Endwise?
Author's Response: The guards would be looking for her. I think it's mentioned that when a blue and purple do not show up for work it would raise alarms. Employers and others don't really notice when reds go missing since it happens all the time, now the government would be looking for him since they know he's not captive but they already know he's missing so when the blue (her) and purple (Nick) don't show up for work the guards will know they are missing. :)
Date: 07/05/14 12:43 pm Title: Chapter 4
Nice action sequences and descriptions in this chapter. As far as the blinking red palm, is it his actual palm blinking? Or are they wearing some kind of badge thing they can't take off? And if it is their palm blinking what causes it to go off? and how did that happen in the first place?
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked the action in this chapter :) I can't remember if we explained the palm things, but they are kind of like an timer implant which changes colour as the years pass (like on Logan's Run lol). I think we explain why they are there in a later chapter, but I'll have to read and see as I can't remember (this is Steph by the way, in case you're wondering)
Date: 07/04/14 10:18 am Title: Chapter 3
Wow, so like I mentioned this is very Logan's Run. Did that inspire you guys? I think 33 was the year when they all had die and Logan decided to flee. I figured it was only a matter of time before AJ turned black. So, Howie works for the bad guy then? I'm guessing that means that either Kevin or Brian is the Luminary and the other must live outside in the toxic world although part of me still hopes they are all brothers. Maybe long lost. lol
Author's Response: Logan's Run did inspire Steph and she's half the brain on this one so yes. I've actually never seen that movie but Steph did talk to me about it. hrmmm yes Howie works for the bad guys so sad :( you love them as brothers don't you. LOL
Date: 07/03/14 10:36 am Title: Chapter 2
It was nice finding out a little more about the two of them and their lives. I hope we get a story about how they ended up as friends.
Author's Response: I had to go back and look at who'd written which chapter as Lore and I took it in turns, so I will respond to the chapters I wrote and let Lore respond to the ones she did. I really hope you enjoy the story and I also hope that Lore and I can finish this story one day as I really loved it.
Yes, as you said in your review to chapter 1, it is kind of a cross between Logan's Run and The Hunger Games. I loved Logan's Run as a kid, and I think when we started writing this story, The Hunger Games movie had come out, so it gave us the idea :)
Date: 07/02/14 09:39 am Title: Chapter 1
Excellent start, Steph. You did a great job setting up this completely bleak and desolate place and wow it is kind of desolate huh? It kind of reminds me of a mix between Logan's Run and The Hunger Games. You know I'm not a huge fan of AUs. I like my boys to be my boys but so far, Nick is very Nick and of course complainy AJ is AJ.
I am looking forward to seeing the other three in this. Of course I'm hoping they are actual family to Nick and AJ in some way. I give you guys credit for tackling sci fi. The hardest part is keeping the story consistent and believable, and not totally confusing so, that's mainly what I'll be looking for as I read this because let's face it, with the two of you I don't have to worry about the mechanics. *hugs you both* :O)
Author's Response: Sorry for the confusion as to who wrote what chapter. HEH. I believe we were a little inspired by Hunger Games when we started this and Steph had brought up Logan's Run and we used a bit of that too. I hope that we have kept this consistent and believable. We both want to finish this and it's my (Lore) fault that the story kind of stopped. I hope we will keep it consistent through the gap. And most of all, I hope you enjoy the story even though it's not a typical genre for you.
Date: 12/24/12 01:40 pm Title: Chapter 22
Yay an update :) can I slap AJ for what he's about to do? Jackass lol. Loving it so far :)
Author's Response:
Thanks for sticking with us Tracy, we promise there is plenty more to come and we plan to get more written after Christmas is out of the way - Steph
Date: 09/24/12 09:32 pm Title: Chapter 21
Oh wow. See I knew Brian had to be the Luminary....but he knew that Kevin's village exists? That bit surprised me a little. If he knew they were there, why is he letting them stay there?
As for AJ....he is gonna expose them because he is jealous of Nick and Emma. Oh lord. I can't wait for what will happen next. Great update ladies!
Author's Response:
heehee yes Brian, evil Brian. I have often said that pissed off Brian is hot (though I don't really want to deal wtih a pissed off Brian). Shocking what he's known this entire time huh? We shall see what AJ plans on doing, it comes to light soon. :) Thanks for the review Tracy, means a lot to us that you have stuck with us. :)
Date: 08/29/12 06:37 am Title: Chapter 20
I knew the luminary must be Brian. It has to be. He already knows where they're hiding too! Hmmmm the plot thickens. Also like the whokle AJ/Nick/Emma love triangle going on. Great and informitive chapter. Thanks girls!
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review Tracy. Yeah, the love triangle is quite interesting, and will become even more interesting :) Glad you are still enjoying the story!
Date: 08/15/12 08:13 pm Title: Chapter 19
I liked the hunting stuff in this chapter, it was really interesting. I'm glad Emma and AJ talked, but I feel like this will cause tension between AJ and Nick later. Great chapter again, I am still enjoying it :)
Author's Response:
thanks for your review Tracy! The hunting part was a bit different to write since I've never hunted before. I actually had to research snares and how you set them and how they work when they are triggered. LOL. It is good that AJ finally talked with Emma but it can only add drama later. Thanks again Tracy!!
Date: 08/02/12 03:21 pm Title: Chapter 18
It's so weird thinking of Brian as the luminary now. I'm hoping that jealousy doesn't come between Nick and AJ, but I have a feeling it might. Can't wait for more! :)
Author's Response:
Evil Brian, lol, but he really does seem to fit the part in this story...or he does in mine and Lore's minds :) Yes, jealousy could become a problem, we'll have to see about that. Thanks for reading Tri :)
Date: 07/09/12 07:01 am Title: Chapter 17
At leadt they know why Kevin did what he did by staying away from Endwise. Sounds like Brian could be the one he was talking about. Ooh sparks fly for Nick and Emma but I can't help but think AJ saw them kiss. This could bring up some drama later. Great chapter, ladies. Looking forward to more :)
Author's Response:
You know me (Lore), Tracy. I love to add a bit of romance into my stories. In fact, I have very few that don't have romance in them... *ponders* hrm perhaps I should write one without? LOL. Thanks for the review Tracy, hope you keep enjoying the fate of our three escapees. :)
