[Report This]Date: 05/16/07 03:00 am Title: Chapter Forty-Four: Disciple
*sniffles* how dare you.... you almost had me crying! She really can't be dead... no no no....
Author's Response: Well... I'm sorry. :(
You'll just have to keep reading. ;)
Thanks for the review. :*
[Report This]Date: 03/26/07 11:03 pm Title: Chapter Thirty-Eight: Seer
whoo hoo! It only took me like an hour and a half to read this chapter -lol I kept having to walk away. My kids are insaine today because it's all rainy. Anyway, as far as the chapter I was really excited to finally get back to Minako, Nick and Brian! I KNEW they weren't dead! Ummm lets see, I loved the whole part between Brian and Minako when Brian was telling her that she gave him a gift even though it wasn't the same as Nick's. It was sooo sweet. I loved how she knew it was sweet but didn't understand it. She's so naieve in some ways... just like Nick. Maybe that's why they're perfect for eachother. Anyway, I thought that was a really nice moment in the story. and then that whole bit about how Brian respects Nick so much. That is just brilliant. It's so true. The kind of people who look to the future really are the stronger ones and Nick has proven himself time and time again. I'm glad that Brian sees that and I'm sure that while he may not have understood it, Nick was grateful to hear it.
Then the battle betweek Brian and the seer was a very interesting concept, but it was soooooooo confusing. I had to read it over like three or four times before I finally understood what was going on. I was really starting to get frustrated actually and that's the first time I've felt that way in this story. You're usually very clear. I don't know if anyone else had that problem but of all the things you may want to go back and tweak, I would take a look at that battle because it should have been very great and instead I just felt lost. :) don't worry though, I still love it!
Author's Response: Oh my gosh, I'm sorry. :(
Well, I'm glad they could all come back sentimentally. :) It might be why they work well together, they're both lost and searching for something. :) Well, Nick is the one who in fact told me that he refused to die. Haha. ;) So he must be very strong. I'm glad you appreciated that. :) It was one of my favorite moments in the story. :)
Ah yes... Brian's battle... It is a very powerful sequence, but I've realized before that having two people in the same body where everyone can hear them both is a bit confusing... In the way that it's supposed to be Brian in one sense, and then seem slightly off, until we all realize it's not Brian... It's hard to pull off... And I've pondered over it for a while now, and all that time before it was posted of course.
I hate to have my readers feel lost, so I may need to go back and tweak that one a bit...
Thanks, as always Kelly. :)
[Report This]Date: 03/11/07 06:31 pm Title: Chapter Thirty-Seven: Renee
Aww, poor Renee. She just doesn't get it. You've made it very easy to pity her so I don't really hate her anymore. I still think she's very childish and selfish but it's not entirely her fault. I'm glad at least once she stopped think that maybe Justin was wrong about Minako's intentions, but she was too quick to trust him. If I was her I would have forgotten everything he said about er the instant she showed up. I don't maybe that's not true. It would have been hard after so much time had passed. See, you've made me pity her. But that's better than pure hatred.
Author's Response: She's a tragic character. I like her a lot. I'd rather the readers didn't hate her, but instea, supposed she just had a different take on the exact same situation. And something this huge, it's taxing. :)
Thanks for the review.
Date: 02/25/07 06:38 am Title: Chapter Thirty-Six: Pale Spirit
haha you sound like me not wanting to repeat myself... frustration isn't it. One quick little ps...
Robbing Nick and Minako of their wedding night was just cruel! They do get the chance to get it on right?
Author's Response: I'll type it out again eventually.... Since it's an idea close to my heart. :) And yeah, frustration is a big wench! Haha.
Well... *shrug* I'm not telling. Besides, do you really think the present situation is a good time to do that? ;)
Date: 02/25/07 06:36 am Title: Chapter Thirty-Six: Pale Spirit
Awww, that's because deep down I don't believe you killed them off! You wouldn't do that to my baby!!!! Right?!?!?!?!? I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT!!!! I have faith in them! Minako will keep her promise and save them all right??? I wouldn't hate the sotry if that's not the case but I surley would love it if it did!! :)
I think Brian's power is my favorite. (and I swear not because it's brian) his is the most mystical of them... Artistic, beautiful, mysterious... Then I agree about Kevin. His scene worked out great though! And I love how you put it that the demons seem to be awakening as they are called upon. That's exactly how it feels! I was trying to think of a way to put it and I couldn't have said it better myself! You may not have meant for the adventure but its there. Has been from the begining, but that's not a bad thing! I love the adventure. I think that's what I like most about fantsay. You're taking a journey in a new land with a goal to accomplish. I want to leave my normal boring life and expierence the adventure as I read it. You manage to do that!
Author's Response: Well good. :) We'll see how it turns out.... Wouldn't want to spoil a good ending for you. :)
I also loved writing Brian's scene. Brian is another one of my favorites. The mystiicism of him... And his love for his partners. :)
Well, they really are awakening... They can be one sort of personna... But become something different when they transform... Although Nick's the most enigmatic. ;)
I suppose... Fantasy is about new worlds and undiscovered notions. :)
Well, I'm glad you like my adventure. :) It's something I'm interested in and I like to see how other people delve into it. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/25/07 06:21 am Title: Chapter Thirty-Six: Pale Spirit
Yay! I love it! poor AJ. I love how you've taken this attitude with him. In a way he's "weak" like Nick and yet he wants so desperately to do the right thing. He has such a big caring heart. Far more than the others it seems. Nick had to learn to love but AJ does it instinctively. I like that. He's a very unique character. Well done! Must stop reading for now, but I'm dying to know what happened to them all and I need to know about Minako, Nick and my Baby Brian!!! So, I shall return! Until then! Adeu!
Author's Response: *sigh* Stupid internet deleted my response.... *pouts*
Anyway....
*sigh* I just don't feel like writing it again....
it was something about courage and kindnes.... Blah.
Anyway.. Glad you liked it. :) And hope you continue to enjoy it. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/25/07 05:47 am Title: Chapter Thirty-Five: Vine Wielder
Hey! Sorry, I never wrote that e-mail. I've been pretty waisted as my body played catch up. But, I do believe I am finally pulling through. She's gonna make it folks!!! YAY!!!!
Anyway, I can't remember all the things I had said about those other chapters. Most of it was probably nonsense anyway. The main point that I wanted to say was that I like the way you always keep us guessing. It seems like every chapter reveals a new mystery and yet each chapter sheds a little more light on it as well. So we the readers are always intrigued and yet never get frustraited with the veil between us and the truth. I think you give us just enough information each chapter. I also said that Since arriving at the castle the story has taken on sort of an Indiana Jones feel, with the booby traps and such. My idea for a new story came in somewhere around those thoughts. It needs some developing but has definately been added to my never ending list of stories to write.
Also, you seemed to have kicked the "adventureness" up a notch and I love that. Other than those things I can't really remember what I was thinking at the time. Curse my mindless button clicking!
*******Now! These last few chapters are by far my favorite so far. I love seeing each Demon find his strength and come into his own, if you will. The action and suspence are there as well as the emotion and the character developement. There were a few lengthy paragraphs in there where you took some time to explore the demons themselves and their duties and purpose. You explored a bit of their history there too and I found all of that facinating. Add that to the wonderful battles and you get my new favorite chapters. I still have to see AJ step up to the plate but I'm really excited. I haven't really figured out his character as much as the others yet and I'm dying to see what happens there. I also love how the tone of the story always changes when the Demons transform into their true forms. Its kind of like when your at a concert waiting for the show to start and then house lights go down and the crowd goes wild. Then there's a short silence and finally the moment you've been anticipating finally happens and you're completely sucked into the battle. You just have a way with setting the stage ya know? I think that's your best quality as a writer, is setting the tone for what's about to happen. Great job!!!! I am sooooo loving this story!!! now... whatever I do dont click "Next" !!!
Author's Response: I'm glad you're feeling better, Kelly. :) I worried about you.
Awww... I like your nonsense. :) Well, what's the point of reading a story if you know what's going to happen? Unless you loved it to death and just want to read it again. :) I'm glad you're curious to find out what happens. :) The end may just surprise you. :) But you might want to slow down... Since you're reaching my ending point. :") Haha, I wasn't really even thinking of Indiana Jones when I wrote it. They just needed some incentive to keep going. ;) Ohmygawd, BSB Indiana Jones style. Haha.
It's not so much adventure in my mind as a final chance to develop who is what... Since the final battle is upon them. And I'm surprised you didn't leave a terful review about how Brian, Nick, and Minako died... ;) That's the one chapter I seem to get reviews for. ;)
Well, it posted fine now. :)
Yeah, I like it best too. Who has what merits before they all face the ultimate test. Nick gets a lot of screen time; the others need their own too. :) I'm glad you liked my lengthy paragraphs. Haha. Most people find them obnoxious. These are my favorites also. It takes a lot of effortcreating unique powers for twenty+ individuals, but I try. :) Well, AJ is next, so be prepared! :)
I like that concert analogy. :) It is like that. I always love when the demons transform. :) Kevin, for instance, is one I struggled with endlessly. His power is defensive, rather than agressive. So how can a defensive power attack? And more importantly, his character is really reserved... But, I like to think that their awakenings give them new power. I hope you like AJ's; it's probably my favorite... Or Brian's... :)
I'm glad you love it. :) I am always so appreciative. :)
Date: 02/18/07 08:58 am Title: Chapter Thirty-Two: Stone Soldier
woohoo! I hit the right button this time! good for me I can read!
Author's Response: Yes you did! :D
[Report This]Date: 02/18/07 08:57 am Title: Chapter Thirty-Two: Stone Soldier
oh my gosh... I'm sooooooooo annoyed right now!!! I just spent like who knows how long writing this big old long review for you and then I hit the "next" button instead of the "submit" button and its all gone! Well I ain't typing it all over again... sorry. at least not right now. Maybe I'll just have to send something similar to it in an e-mail later when I'm a little less annoyed at myself. If I can remember it all. You'd be surprised how often I do that to myself. Or maybe you wouldn't be that surprised. I'm always writing these things late at night and I'm sure I come across as the biggest space case in the world most of the time. I swear, I'm not always that dumb... really... oh, and my review was sooo good too. lots of good stuff! and some funny parts too and if you can believe it or not an awesome idea for a new story I'm going to have to write now inspired by this chapter... grrrrrr!!!!!!! sorry. I need to stop now. I'll send you a pm tomorrow. not that any of my thought or comments were really all that relevent or helpful or anything but you know... maybe you still want to hear my reactions to reading your story. (as opposed to ranting about erasing my whole review) ok , I'm done now...
Author's Response: Oh, poor Kelly! *hug*
Sure, tomorrow I'll look for it. :)
A story inspired by my story? :o
[Report This]Date: 02/09/07 10:17 am Title: Chapter Thirty: Invitation
Wow, I don't know how many chapters I just read and forgot to leave comments... I just wanted to find out what happened next... The whole wedding thing? Too cute!!!!! Loved it. And geez, Nick's a total bad ass! HAHA. I guess John Lennon was right. All you need is love. Yea, I'm excited to find out what happens next! But, alas, it must wait until at least tomorrow. goodnight chika!
Author's Response: Four. That's what it looks like anyway....
A bad ass? How? And of course all you need is love. *nod*
No worries. Nighty night. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/06/07 01:02 am Title: Chapter Twenty-Five: Deep Scars
Oh, that's sad. Poor Renee. I feel for her but I still don't see how she could say that Minako never tried to look for her when she came to find her in the palace. I'm still not sure what she feels Minako lied to her about. Maybe I missed something back in the chapter where the girls first came face to face. Maybe I need to go back and read it again because you've given me enough clues that I should understand by now. I dunno.
Author's Response: Nope, you didn't miss anything. All will be revealed soon. :) In about ten chapters actually... Renee is a complicated character; she takes some getting used to. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/06/07 12:16 am Title: Chapter Twenty-Two: Battle Royal
"Wish number three, she would become a God and rule her own world." Harsh. If you ask me I think Renee may have a bit of a chemical imbalance. -lol She loses her patience a LOT. I love though, the way you have shown the difference between good and evil with the demons. Minako's demons have all helped one another and Renee's demons have tried to hurt each other. Symbolism... nice.
Author's Response: Well, I personally love writing Renee and Justin. They're so evil, it's wonderful.
Well, sometimes the simplest ideas can represent complex things. :) Though the Emerald demons may surprise you later. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/05/07 11:56 pm Title: Chapter Twenty-One: Stranger
LOL I didn't get through this chapter the other night. I was really, really tired...
but... A little girl on girl... on boy action in this chapter!!!! Hot. So, million dollar question, did you decide to make Lance the one who changes from man to woman before or after he came out of the closet. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Very interesting chapter though. I hope you are going to explain why Lance's best friend that died's name is Minako's last name. It is right? I didn't just make that up did I? Anyway I like seeing more of Renee's story, but I think its goog that you've chosen to splice it throughout the rest of the story. It's more fitting a piece at a time.
Author's Response: Hahaha. I tried. ;) I actually wrote this chapter back in February (2006), so I had this written long before he announced his sexual preference.
Yes, Lance's friend's name and Minako's last name are both Mikagi. At the time it was more to bridge together Lance and Renee, but maybe I can explore that in "Pandora". :)
I thought so too. Minako is the protagonist, this being BSB fan fic and all, but everyone needs their story told at one point or another. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/04/07 06:54 am Title: Chapter Twenty: Requiem
hey! This was a good chapter. It shed a lot of light on the legend but the begining seemed a little unclear to me. I still can't understand why Renee feels so betrayed by Minako. Is she jealous of Nick? Is she jealous that Minako has found love? I am also a little confused as to Renee's heart. She was singing that poem (beautiful poetry by the way, did you write it?) but I don't know who she loves. For a minute it seemed like she loved Minako and then it sounded like she loved Nick and then I thought that maybe she wanted Justin to love her the way Nick loved Minako but I just can't quite make sense of it. I don't know, maybe I'm just tired... (I am really tired.) maybe I should go to bed...
... no, at least one more chapter ;)
Author's Response: First of all, don't let PBox damage your health. *hug*
I didn't write that poem/song, it's originally a Japanese song. :) I just found a translated version and thought it really fit Renee well... It kinda grows to be her trademark.
Who Renee loves... That's tricky... ;) Renee is the ever suspensuful character that gets revealed little by little. :)
[Report This]Date: 02/04/07 01:58 am Title: Chapter Forty-Five: God
YOU BROUGHT HER BACK!!!!! *screams* well at least she's fighting Renee...
I think you did decent on "God" I saw a few times that really reminded me of him. :-D
Author's Response: Technically Nick rought her back. ;)
And good, I'm glad. I really wasn't trying though... I just kind of started making God into my own creation, instead of who I actually hoped to create my base on. :)
Glad you enjoyed it sweetie. :*
