Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 01

Fall, 1994

            "You're so lucky, AJ!" Kendall said. All the girls were excited and jealous of their friend AJ's budding music career.  Even at 15, he commanded attention.  Class clown but also the star of every musical the high school did because he was just that good.

            Now that he's leaving to get his newly formed group, the Backstreet Boys, off the ground, his closest friends are all excited for him. And a bit down that he's leaving.

            AJ looks at his best friends since second grade. Yes, all girls. Kendall was the cheerleader.  Miss Rah-Rah-Sis-Boom-Bah! He was closest to her. Who are they trying to kid. They had gone "farther" than everyone else and even though no one would admit it, she was his girlfriend.  He knows he'll miss her the most.

            Then there's Lorelei, Miss Popularity. She's friendly to everyone, fun and bubbly. It's a good bet that once again she'll be class president and a member of homecoming court. AJ's going to miss seeing that. She always manages to wow him when she dresses up.

            Then we have Meagan. Miss Artsy. Sometimes she's too moody for AJ's taste, but she's always been there for him.  She drew him a caricature of himself and his ‘girls' to take with him so he'd always remember them.  Like he'd forget.

            And finally Giselle. Her mom wanted her to be a model, hence her name. Looking at her, anyone can see that won't happen. She's a beautiful girl with a heart of gold, but she's such a nerd. She doesn't get angry when people say it because she knows it's true. She'd rather read a book than do anything else.

Even though Kendall is his girlfriend, Giselle is his best friend. She spent hours giving him pep talks about his music. She's his biggest supporter of his chosen career and aside from his mom, whom he loves beyond all reason, he wants to make Giselle proud of him.

As he's waiting for the bus to pick him up to take him away to fame and fortune, all the girls are huddled with him. His mom is standing close by, proud of her son for keeping things real with his friends. She loves these girls like they were her own, and she knows just how badly they are going to miss him.

When the bus stops, AJ's ‘new' friends come piling off the bus to meet the girls.  He introduces them all and loves the fact that the guys are so willing to accept his friends into their ‘inner-circle'.  Kevin, the oldest, says, "When we're back in town, we'll have to make sure you all can come and hang out."

            Kendall being Kendall says, "You better. You're stealing our fun."

            AJ laughs and hugs her, saying, "No one is stealing me. You girls are always going to be my bestest buds."

            While everyone is joking and carrying on, Giselle stands quietly to the side. She knows the one named Nick is staring at her and it makes her more than uncomfortable. When she's finally brave enough to look his way, he tries to smile, but he's as awkward as she is. Being the youngest, he's not sure how to act. Her being the shyest, she doesn't know what to say.

            Soon it's time for AJ to go. He hugs Meagan first, making her promise to keep sending him pictures. She tells him she just got a new camera and she's going to take tons of pictures just for him.

            Then he hugs Lorelei, making her promise to keep the fun in their class, even if she is class president. She laughs at him and promises to send him one of her campaign buttons and a copy of her speech.

            You'd think Kendall would have been last, but she understood his relationship with Giselle better than anyone. She and Giselle were polar opposites and next to AJ, she was closest to her. She knew how hard AJ leaving was going to be on her friend.  After a goodbye hug that makes them all jealous, AJ kisses her.  The kind of kiss that makes a girl blush. When his mom broke it up, AJ blushed and so did Kendall. But you could tell from the look on her face she was more than glad her first French kiss came from AJ McLean.

            Finally, he turns to Giselle. She had made herself a promise not to cry. AJ was the brother she never had. Being an only child, until this group had come into her life, she never knew what it was like to have unconditional love. Now, part of that love was going away. Tears threaten to fall as AJ grabs her. He whispers, "Remember, Elle...you can call me anytime, ok?"

She nods against his chest and whispers, "I'll miss you."

Behind him, his mother says, "Come on Alex, time to go."

Giselle steps away from him. He kisses her cheek and says, "Behave yourself."

She smiles as he steps up on the bus and whispers, "Be safe."

After the bus is out of sight, the girls start their walk home. When they get to Lorelei's house, she says, "Come on, guys, he's going to be rich and famous. We have to be excited about that."

Meagan says, "I think we all are, Lore...but he's gone now. God knows when he'll be back. Why couldn't they do all this stuff around here?"

Kendall says, "Because they can't just perform here and be famous."

Meagan says, "Yeah, yeah, I know. But they could have stayed long enough for me to get to know Brian. He's cute."

They all laugh, even Giselle, even though her heart isn't in it. Lorelei says, "I'm glad you didn't say Howie. I might have had to hurt you."

Kendall giggles and says, "You guys know AJ. First chance he has, he'll be back here."

Giselle knows she's going to cry. Not wanting to do it in front of her friends, she says, "Listen, I gotta get home. Mom's got company coming over and I have chores. See you all later."

As she practically runs away, Meagan yells, "Giselle, wait!"

Kendall says, "No, let her go Meg. She needs to be alone."

Lorelei says, "Kendall, did Giselle and AJ ever...you know?"

Kendall shakes her head and says, "No, of course not. Get real. She's just really upset about him leaving. She doesn't have anyone but us, Lore. You know that. Her mother is a real bitch. We've all seen that."

Meagan says, "I feel really bad for her, Ken...now that AJ's gone, who's gonna be here for her when her mom starts drinking again?"

Kendall says, "We will. It's what AJ would want." She looks around and says, "Why don't you guys hang out? I'm going to go check on her and try to get the rest of my homework finished. Mr. Phipps is going to shoot me if I turn in another late assignment."

The girls hug her and Lorelei says, "Ken, AJ loves you. You know he'll be back."

Smiling confidently, she says, "I know he will. See ya."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 02

            AJ watched the girls fade from sight. Brian says, "They're cute man!  And that kiss!  WOW!" Denise pretends not to listen, but on the inside, she's wondering just how innocent her little boy is.

            AJ takes the ribbing good naturedly and says, "What can I say, Gentlemen? Beautiful women love me."

            They all laugh. All but Nick. AJ sits beside him and says, "What's wrong, Kaos? Not up for girl-talk?"

            Nick pushes him away and says, "Just leave me alone!"

            Nick turns away. AJ starts to say something, but his mother gets his attention and says, "Enough boys. Get some rest."

            AJ starts to move away from Nick, but before he does, he says, "I'm just playing Nick. My friends are great, trust me. Next time we're home, you can hang out with us and you'll see."

            Nick turns to AJ, not sure he can trust the older boy yet. He says, "For real?"

            AJ says, "Sure man. Trust me, my friends are great. You're gonna love them." Turning back to his mom, he says, "When's lunch? I'm hungry."

            Life at school moved on for the girls.  Not long after AJ left, Lorelei announced she was moving to Denver. Her Dad got transferred out there. They had a big party for her send off, but it sends Giselle into more of a funk.

            Meagan throws herself into her art, focusing mainly on photography. She's so good, she's put on the school paper and the yearbook committee which is great for her.

            Even Kendall throws herself full force into cheerleading. She has practice almost every day.

            All this just makes Giselle even more lonely. She picks up her phone on more than one occasion to call AJ then backs down. Everyone has something going on in their life. She doesn't want to be the downer of the group.

            Summer comes and all the girls get part time jobs. They hang out every Thursday and Sunday night, giving each other makeovers and talking about how much fun senior year is going to be.

            School's been in session a couple of weeks when Giselle starts skipping the girls' time together. First she blames work, then Kendall and Meagan both realize she's been lying to them. Meagan went by where she worked only to find she had quit weeks earlier, with no explanation.

            Kendall and Meagan are sitting at Starbucks and Meagan says, "Why would she lie to us?"

            Kendall says, "Something must have happened with her mom. She's been evasive when I ask about it. Did she say something to you?"

            Meagan says, "No, but I haven't seen her much. It's like she goes out of her way to avoid me."

            Kendall says, "Me too. I'm going to go over and find out what's going on."

            Meagan says, "Maybe you should tell her about Shawn too. You're not going to keep that quiet forever."

            Shawn Maxwell is the star of the basketball team and he and Kendall had been out a few times. Kendall hadn't said anything because she wasn't sure how serious it was. Until Shawn asked her to wear his ring. She sighs and says, "Yeah, I guess I should. Want to go with me?"

            Meagan says, "I can't. Yearbook meeting. Call me and let me know what's going on."

            Meagan leaves and Kendall calls Giselle. She says, "Hey, can I come over? I need to tell you something."

 Once she's there, they settle on the trampoline to talk and Kendall says, "I'm dating Shawn Maxwell."

            Giselle's mouth falls open and she says, "What? What about AJ?"

            Kendall says, "I'll always love AJ, but let's face it, he's not going to save himself for me.  You know how he is. We talked about it before he left."

            Giselle says, "I'm really surprised. I thought, you know, you had decided he would be the one..."

            Kendall laughs and says, "He almost was, Giselle. But neither of us was ready for that step. We did some stuff, but we didn't go all the way." When Giselle gets really quiet and Kendall says, "What's wrong G?"

            Shaking her head, Giselle says, "Same thing. Mom bringing home all these men. I don't like how they look at me, Ken. It's starting to scare me."

            Kendall says, "Did you tell your mom?"

            Giselle snorts and says, "When is she sober enough to listen? I want to get out of here, Ken. I wish..."

            Kendall grabs her hand and says, "I wish AJ was here too. You know he'd take care of you."

            Giselle says, "But he's not. I have to take care of myself." After a pause, she says, "I went to the counselor at school.  My mom's going to be investigated I think."

            Kendall says, "But G, that's GOOD news!"

            Giselle shrugs and says, "What kind of daughter am I to turn in my own mother?"

            Kendall says, "Giselle, stop it! She's treated you like shit forever. She doesn't take care of you, you take care of her. It's not right!"

            Giselle says, "But what's going to happen now?"

            Kendall says, "Whatever it is, you've got us.  ALL of us. Did you tell AJ?"

            Giselle shakes her head and says, "I haven't talked to him in a while. He's probably busy."

            Kendall says, "Giselle, why didn't you tell Meagan and me?" When she doesn't say anything, Kendall says, "G, you don't have to be embarrassed around us. We're best friends, remember?  The Four Musketeers? All for one?"

            Giselle says, "I'm sorry, Ken. Really. I just don't think it's fair to ask all of you to deal with my problems."

            Kendall says, "Sleep at my house tonight. Come on. I don't want to leave you alone like this."

            Giselle says, "I'm not suicidal Ken. Besides, Mom will say no."

            Kendall hugs her and says, "Stop hiding this shit from me and Meagan and AJ. I mean it."

            Giselle says, "I promise. Now go, before she wakes up. I don't know what's going to happen."

            Before she leaves, Kendall says, "Call AJ, G. And call me if anything happens."

            But she never did call him. A week later, 17 year old Giselle Hunt was moved into a foster care facility for adult children. And she hated it. She cried herself to sleep every night.

            At school, things were different though. Everyone knew what had happened. They pitied her, but instead of making her feel like a freak, she was shown a lot of compassion. A couple of guys asked her out, which she politely refused. She knew Kendall and Meagan were behind all the support she was getting and she was eternally grateful her friends were doing everything in their power to help her through this.

            AJ was tired of the stupid buses. He wanted a bed that didn't move and twenty four hours of uninterrupted sleep. Not likely to happen with Nick and Brian playing video games.

            When his mom opens the curtain to his bunk and says, "AJ, Kendall's on the phone for you," relief floods through him. Finally, someone who won't talk about work. He answers it, saying, "Hey Girl, missing me?"

            She laughs and says, "You know it."

            He can tell just from the tone of her voice something's going on. He says, "What's wrong? Superstar dump you?"

            She says, "No, you dork. We're fine." After a brief pause, she says, "Has Giselle called you?"

            Instantly on edge, he says, "No. I called her house a few times, but you know how her mom is. When I call her cell, I get her voicemail." When she's quiet for more than a minute, he says, "What's going on Kendall?"

            By the time she's finished telling him what's been happening, AJ's crying. He whispers, "Kendall, she's my best friend. Why didn't SHE call me?"

            Kendall says, "She's embarrassed AJ. She hates the place she's living now. I'm worried about her."

            He says, "We have some time off coming soon. I'm supposed to spend it in Atlanta with the guys, but I'm coming home."

            Kendall says, "AJ, she'll hate me for telling you, but...she needs you. Meagan and I are trying but she won't let us...she won't let us be there for her."

            AJ says, "Why?"

            Kendall says, "After you and Lorelei left, I think she's afraid to let Meagan and I stay close. AJ I love her like a sister and my heart is breaking. She feels abandoned and alone."

            AJ curses under his breath and says, "I'm coming home, Kendall. Soon. I promise."

            After he hangs up, he lays down on his bed and thinks about Giselle. Her life with her mom was shitty for as long as he's known her.  Now that she's away from her and has a chance at being happy, she's miserable. Crawling out of the bunk, he says, "Mom, Elle needs me, I gotta go home."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 03

            Just what Giselle wants to look forward to; Thanksgiving at a halfway house for unwanted teenagers. She sits on her bed in the room she shares with two other girls waiting for the inevitable knock on the door. The guys who live down the hall have taken it upon themselves to torture her on a daily basis.

            At first they called her Brainiac because of her straight A's. Then they started calling her Gazelle because she lost so much weight. Now that they found out about her mother's past, they've graduated to insinuating she's an easy lay like her mother. With thoughts of running away filling her mind, she's surprised when Mrs. Jenkins, their warden, for lack of a better word, comes to tell her she has a visitor in the reception room.

            Sighing, she slides her bookmark in her book and shoves it under her pillow. She checks her hair before opening the door. When she's halfway to the stairs, she hears Greg say, "Where you going, Gazelle? Got a hot date?"

            Ignoring him, she keeps walking.  Dean yells, "Nah, she doesn't date. She just screws them and moves on."

            Greg laughs lewdly and says, "When's it gonna be my turn Gazelle? When do I get my piece of ass?"

            Mrs. Jenkins comes half way up the stairs and says, "BOYS, I will not tolerate this any longer. One more word and both of you will be grounded till Christmas." Giselle tries to thank her, but she can't. Mrs. Jenkins just pats her arm and says, "Don't listen to them Giselle. They are just being mean."

            Giselle makes her way to the reception room, expecting to see Meagan and Kendall. When she opens the door, her guest stands and she can't believe her eyes. AJ. She runs up to him and throws herself into his arms, sobbing into his shirt. He hugs her tight and says, "Don't cry Elle. Please don't cry."

            When her sobbing subsides, they sit together and she says, "Why are you here?"

            He says, "Why do you think? Kendall calls me and tells me all kinds of shit has been happening that my best friend is keeping from me."

            She lowers her head and says, "I couldn't bother you with this AJ. You're busy."

            He says, "Elle, come on, this is me. We've been friends for so long you gotta know you're more important to me than a job. What happened with your mom?"

            She says, "The same stuff. Only, when I turned 16 I didn't like how some of those men started looking at me. After you left, it just got worse."

            He says, "Giselle, did they touch you?"

            She shakes her head and says, "No, no one did. But I was afraid they would. Kendall wanted me to talk to Mom but...well, you remember how she was."

            He says, "Yeah, she was never sober enough to know what was going on." Looking around, he says, "How is it here?"

            Knowing he'll never believe her if she lies, she says, "I hate it."

            Before he can ask why, Greg and Dean come waltzing in and Greg says, "Oh, look, Gazelle has a boyfriend."

            AJ stands up and says, "Shut your mouth."

            Dean says, "Or what? Oh, I'm sorry, did you want to be alone with Gazelle so you could fuck her? We hear she's good."

            AJ starts across the floor to take a swing at them both, but Giselle grabs him and says, "AJ, don't!"

            Mrs. Jenkins comes rushing into the room and says, "That's it. I've had enough of you two. Get up to your room NOW!"

            Greg says, "Come on, Mrs. J, we're just messing with them."

            She says, "I've had it with you two. Your room, NOW!"

            They both go out grumbling and she turns to AJ and Giselle. AJ is trembling in rage and Giselle is on the verge of tears. She says, "Giselle, I'm so sorry. I've been trying to find an opening for you in another facility. None of them have empty beds. Isn't there someone who can foster you until you turn 18?"

            She shakes her head and says, "No.  No one has room. I'll be fine."

            She turns to AJ and says, "I am terribly sorry. Those boys will be the death of me."

            After she leaves, AJ says, "Is it like that all the time, Elle?"

            She nods and walks to the window. She says, "Most of the time I just ignore them."

            He says, "Do you have to sleep here tonight?"

            She turns and says, "What do you mean?"

            He says, "Those two are going to take their punishment out on you. I want you to come to my house."

            She says, "AJ, I don't know...I don't want to impose on your mom."

            He says, "I am not leaving you here Giselle."  He walks to the door and opens it and says, "Mrs. Jenkins, can Giselle stay at my house tonight?"

            She says, "I'm not sure that's appropriate, young man."

            He says, "I don't mean with just me. My mom is there."

            She says, "I'll have to speak with your mother." Looking at Giselle, she says, "Would you like to, Giselle?" Giselle nods emphatically and she says, "Then why don't you go pack a bag while I have this young man call his mother?"

            As Giselle throws some things in her backpack, she hears Dean and Greg in the hallway. Making sure her bedroom door is locked, she watches the handle wiggle. Then she hears Dean say, "Don't worry Bitch. One of these days, you'll get to play with us."

            She shakes in fear as she hears them retreat once again to their room. Knowing she can't come back here, she grabs a suitcase and puts everything in it she can, and then fills her back pack with her books.

            When she gets downstairs, Mrs. Jenkins says, "Giselle, you're going for a night, not forever."

            AJ knows her well enough to see the fear in her eyes. He looks at Mrs. Jenkins and says, "If I have anything to say about it, she won't be back. If nothing else, my Mom will foster her till she's 18."

            Giselle looks at AJ shocked and says, "But AJ, she has to go with you."

            He says, "I'm a grown man Giselle. Besides, Nick's Mom or Brian's can chaperone me for a few months. I'm not leaving you here alone."

            Mrs. Jenkins can see how serious AJ is and she says, "Have your mother come by tomorrow. I have all the paperwork she'll need to foster Giselle." Looking at her frightened young ward, she says, "Giselle, you're a special girl and you deserve better than this place."

            Giselle hugs her and says, "Thank you Mrs. Jenkins."

            She says, "Just take care of yourself. I expect an invitation to your graduation. And I expect you to be valedictorian."

            Giselle blushes and says, "Thanks."

            Once they are in AJ's car, he says, "Elle, you should have called me when all this started."

            She says, "AJ, you have a new life. It's not my place to interfere with that."

            He says, "Would you shut up and listen to me?" Her shock at his words is evident and he says, "I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound mean, but...Elle, you are important to me. You've always been important to me. No matter what happens with my life or my career, you WILL be important. Got it?"

            She reaches over to touch his hand and she says, "AJ, I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't call because I didn't want you to feel sorry for me. Kendall and Meagan have half the guys in the senior class asking me out because they feel sorry for me. I just...I don't want you to be like that too."

            He says, "Elle, I don't feel sorry for you. I'm sad for you, but that's different."

            She says, "Do you think your Mom will foster me?"

            He says, "If she won't, I know she'll know someone that will."

            When he parks at his house, he says, "Oh, just so you know, Nick is staying with us too."

            She's really shocked at that. She says, "I thought you told me he had a big family."

            He says, "He does. Just not a happy one. I told him he could hang with us. That's cool, right?"

            She smiles and says, "Sure. Anything to stay away from that place."

            He squeezes her hand and says, "From now on, completely honest. Right?"

            She nods and says, "I promise."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 04

            Thanksgiving actually turned out to be fun for Giselle.  After dinner, AJ invited Kendall and Meagan over, Kendall's boyfriend Shawn was invited too. At first, he and AJ seemed to size each other up, but AJ could see Kendall really liked the guy. Besides, he kind of has a girlfriend too...no one knows yet though.

            Nick was pretty quiet the first few days, but when all the "kids" are there, he starts opening up. Everyone treats him like a new friend, not like the "youngest" as the case is when he's with the group.  When AJ makes a comment about the rest of the guys coming to Florida to work on new material, Giselle sees Nick lose some of his happy mood. When he leaves the living room, saying he's getting another drink, she follows him.

            When he sees her behind him in the kitchen, he says, "Uh, hi."

            She smiles and says, "I get it Nick."

            He says, "What?"

            I say, "They treat you like a little kid, huh?"

            He blushes and turns around, saying, "No, it's..."

            She says, "Nick, have you noticed how they treat me? Like I'm gonna break." When he turns to look at her, she says, "OK, I was a basket case when AJ got me from that house, but seriously, they always hover and protect me. It used to bug the crap out of me till I realized it's only because they care so much."

            He says, "So how do I make them stop treating me like a kid."

            I laugh and say, "Throw it back in their faces."

            He says, "No, seriously."

            I say, "Seriously, don't act like a kid. I mean, sure, today we're having fun and goofing off, but when it comes to your music, don't. Show them how serious you are about making it work." When he doesn't say anything, she says, "Know what AJ told me?"

            He rolls his eyes and says, "I can imagine."

            She says, "AJ told me you're one of the most gifted singers he's ever listened too and if the group succeeds it's going to be because of you."

            He seems stunned. He says, "You're lying."

            She shakes her head and says, "No, I'm not. Nick, I've known AJ forever. He, Kendall, Meagan and I have been friends all through school. They always accepted me for who I am. They never tried to use me to help their grades, even though at one point I'd have gladly cheated to keep them as my friends. We understand and accept each other for who we are. If you give AJ a chance, he'll be the best friend you've ever had."

            Nick says, "Yeah, I've noticed. Even though he teases me, he always sticks up for me."

            She smiles at him and says, "You've got more friends now too, Nick. You've got Meagan, Kendall and me."

            Even though he's 15, Giselle can still see he's quite shy and naïve. She says, "Come on; let's go see what they are up to."

            The Monday after Thanksgiving, the Backstreet Boys get to work on new music while Kendall, Meagan and Giselle go back to school. During fourth period, Giselle is called to the guidance counselor's office. When she gets there she's surprised to find her case worker waiting.

            When she sits down, Mrs. Tubbs says, "Giselle, we received an application for a private family to foster you until you graduate. We'd like to talk to you about it."

            She says, "OK," still not sure where it's leading.

            Mrs. Tubbs opens the door and in walks Howie, with a couple Giselle assumes is his parents. When they are seated, Mrs. Tubbs says, "I believe you know Howie, this is Hoke and Paula, his parents."

            Giselle says, "Hello, it's nice to meet you."

            Howie sits beside Giselle and says, "How's it going?"

            She smiles at him as his mother says, "It's nice to meet you too Giselle. Denise explained to us your situation. We have plenty of room at our house. All of our kids are out on their own now."

            Giselle looks at Mrs. Tubbs and says, "Is that going to be ok?"

            Mrs. Tubbs says, "They passed the initial interview. We're going to let you stay with them on a trial basis for a week. If you don't have problems, it will be permanent. You'll be in their custody until you graduate from high school."

            Giselle looks at them and says, "I don't know how to thank you."

            Hoke says, "You don't have to thank us. You're a friend of the boys and you need help. We're glad we can do it."

            Giselle looks at Howie and he winks at her and says, "Dad's a big push over. Mom's the one you gotta watch out for."

            Giselle laughs and looks at Mrs. Tubbs and says, "Thank you."

            Mrs. Tubbs smiles and says, "You don't have to thank me Giselle. It's my job to make sure you are in the safest environment possible. Mrs. Jenkins called me in on Dean and Greg. They will be moving to a juvenile detention center. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that."

            Mrs. Tubbs gathers her papers, leaving Giselle alone with Howie and his parents. Paula says, "Giselle, we know you're really good friends with AJ, but since we are going to be watched for the next week, I think you better sleep at our house. AJ can come and visit and all your other friends are welcome anytime. We ask only that you let us know if you want to have guests and if you plan on going out, you will have a curfew."

            Giselle says, "You don't have to worry about that. The latest I ever stayed out was 10:00 and that was to see a movie with Kendall or Meagan. I'll help out around the house too. I'll cook, do chores, whatever you need me to do."

            Hoke says, "Now, Giselle, we don't need a maid. You focus on your education."

            Paula says, "Hoke's right. You have to focus on your school work."

            The next few weeks were ideal for Giselle. With nothing to worry about at home, her friends see her opening up and smiling more. Howie confided in AJ that having Giselle around wasn't so bad. She even clued him in to the fact that her friend Meagan has a crush on Brian.

            After New Year's it's time for the boys to go back on the road. This time, they are going to record their first record. The night before they leave, Hoke and Paula let the kids all get together at their house for a farewell dinner. Kevin and Howie skipped the party, deciding to spend the evening with their girlfriends.

            After they have stuffed themselves with pizza and hot wings, the kids all move to the living room. AJ says, "You know, we should play a really fun game."

            Giselle knows AJ is up to something. She says, "What are you thinking, AJ?"

            AJ says, "I think we should play Truth or Dare."

            Everyone seems to think it's a great idea.  Except Giselle.  But she keeps her mouth shut, not wanting them to realize how uncomfortable she really is. AJ says, "OK, so who's first?"

            Kendall says, "Your idea AJ, I say you go first."

            AJ can tell she's really pissed her boyfriend wouldn't come with her so he says, "OK, Kendall, I pick you. Truth or Dare?"

            Knowing he's going to embarrass the hell out of her, she says, "Truth."

            He says, "Has Loverboy felt you up yet?"

            Nick blushes and averts his gaze, his eyes colliding with Giselle's. She's as embarrassed as he is, but she's managing to hide it. He scoots closer to her and whispers, "Is this fun?"

            Giselle whispers back, "It's supposed to be."

            Kendall looks AJ dead in the eye and says, "Yes, he has." After AJ's mouth drops in shock, she says, "Meagan, truth or dare."

            Meagan says, "Dare."

            Kendall says, "I dare you to flash the guys."

            Giselle says, "Kendall, I think you need to tone it down. Howie's parents ARE in the other room."

            Brian says, "No, they aren't. They went to bed forty five minutes ago."

            AJ says, "Yeah, come on, Elle. It's just a game. We're not asking her to get naked." Leering at Kendall, he says, "Yet."

            Giselle never noticed the tension between AJ and Kendall until just then. It's like they are staring holes through each other. Then it dawns on her, they still like each other. LIKE, like each other.

            She turns her attention back to the game in time to see Meagan lift her shirt up briefly, giving them a glimpse of her bright red bra. Embarrassed and trying not to show it, she says, "OK, AJ, truth or dare?"

            Looking at Kendall, he says, "Oh, definitely a dare."

            Giselle's turn to slide closer to Nick. She whispers, "Why do I get the feeling Kendall and AJ need to be alone?"

            He chuckles and whispers, "They do. AJ hates her boyfriend."

            They turn back to the game in time to hear Meagan say, "I dare you to PROVE you go commando."

            AJ sputters and says, "Now wait a minute..."

            Kendall says, "You can always refuse, AJ."

            Gritting his teeth, he unbuttons his pants, turns his back to them and pushes them down far enough that his bare bottom shows. Everyone cheers his courage. Giselle steals a glimpse at Kendall and sees her friend is really bothered by what she sees. Hot and bothered.

            AJ says, "So I get to go again?  OK, Brian, truth or dare?"

            Brian knows AJ well enough to know to try to play it safe. He says, "Truth."

            AJ says, "Who is the one girl you have a mad crush on?" Before Brian can answer, AJ says, "Shania Twain doesn't count. I mean a real girl."

            Brian shoot daggers with his eyes at AJ. Giselle inches a little bit closer to Nick and whispers, "What don't I know?"

            He whispers back, "He likes Meagan."

            Brian blushes under his tan and says, "Meagan." Looking at AJ he says, "I'll get you for this."

            Meagan's mouth drops open as her eyes collide with Brian's. He says, "I was going to ask you out when we came back for the summer."

            She blushes and says, "I hope you still do."

            Brian smiles and says, "OK." Looking around he says, "Kendall, truth or dare?"

            She eyes AJ and says, "Dare."

            Brian says, "I dare you to give one of us a lap dance."

            She looks at him and says, "One of the guys or anyone?"

            The idea of seeing her giving another girl a lap dance makes Brian stop and think, but he says, "One of the guys."

            She looks at AJ then back at Brian and says, "I need music."

            Brian turns on the stereo, keeping it low so as not to awaken Howie's parents. After finding a nice, mid tempo song, he sits back down and waits, fully expecting Kendall to pick AJ.

            Imagine everyone's shock, including Nick's, when she picks him. After grinding on him for a full two minutes, she sits back down, smirking at AJ.  Nick looks uncomfortable as he tries not to blush too badly at the turn of events.

            Kendall looks around the room and says, "G, truth or dare?"

            Giselle knows she's hopelessly screwed, thanks to the mood AJ's put Kendall in, so she says, "Dare."

            AJ looks at Giselle and says, "What?"

            Kendall says, "G, I dare you to kiss one of the guys."

            Giselle wants to kill her friend. After Brian's confession, she knows if she chooses him, Meagan will be upset. And AJ is her best friend. It would be too weird to kiss him. She turns her gaze to Nick. Before she can do anything, Kendall says, "You can even take him out of the room if it's too embarrassing to do it in front of us."

            Giselle grabs Nick's hand and pulls him behind her into the kitchen, ignoring the whistles and catcalls from her friends. Once in the kitchen, she says, "We don't have to. We can lie and say we did."

            He lowers his head and says, "OK, whatever...I understand if you don't want too..."

            She says, "Nick...do you WANT to kiss me?" Without meeting her gaze, he nods. She steps closer to him and whispers, "Nick." When his eyes meet hers, she says, "I want to kiss you too."

            Surprise lights his eyes. When he sees her lick her lips, he gets all nervous. She steps closer, her body touching his and lifts her face up. He meets her half way and covers her lips with his. Considering this is the first kiss for both of them, neither is sure of what they are doing. Then his hands find her hips and his tongue gently touches her bottom lip.

            The world tilts as Giselle opens her mouth and allows Nick to slide his tongue along hers. The feelings he awakens in her shocks her. She never knew kissing a guy could feel like this. Then Nick pulls her closer and she can feel his dick is getting hard. As much as it scares her, she doesn't want to stop.

Nick presses her fully against his body, loving how it feels when she runs her fingers through his hair and holds him tight. Knowing she's enjoying it makes him want to keep going. Until he hears AJ whisper, "DAMN, my boy's got GAME!"

When she hears the rest of them giggling Giselle is pulled from the sexual fog Nick has her in. She pulls back and stares into Nick's eyes. This is a turning point in her life. But a turning point to what?

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 05

            After the boys left, the girls throw themselves full force into school and work. Even though they said she didn't have to work, Giselle really wanted to get a part time job. Without parents to speak of, when it's time to get out on her own, she's going to have to be able to take care of herself.

            At the beginning of April, prom talk revs up at school.  Giselle ignores most of it, not really thinking she's going to go. Until one sunny Saturday when she's at the mall with Meagan and Kendall.  They are trying on prom dresses when out of the blue, Meagan says, "OK, we picked out our dresses, time to find yours, G."

            Meagan's dress was an orange multi-colored dress with a sequined bodice. The halter style and low back made her look much older than her 18 years.  Kendall's dress is short, with shades of pink and a hint of purple. The dress is strapless and the top, both front and back, is completely covered in mulit-colored sequins.  It perfectly matches her personality.

            Giselle looks at them and says, "I don't need a dress. I'm not going."

            Exasperated, Kendall says, "Oh yes you are!"

            Giselle turns to walk away. "Ken, I swear, just drop it, ok? I don't have a date and I'm not going."

            Meagan grabs her arm to stop her. "You could have a date. I know at least three guys that asked you."

            Giselle shrugs her off. "They asked to get closer to you, Meagan. Who are you going with anyway?"

            Meagan blushes and says, "Brian."

            Kendall and Giselle's mouths drop open and Kendall says, "Since when?"      

            Meagan tries to look nonchalant. "Since I called and asked him too."

            All the girls squeal and Giselle says, "I can't believe it!  AJ never said a word!"

            Meagan sighs. "Because no one knows.  If they know, they'll just tease Brian."

            Kendall squeals. "Well whatever, that is WICKED cool."  Turning back to Giselle, she says, "G, seriously, you can't skip senior prom. You have to go."

            Giselle shakes her head. "Ken, I don't...no. No."

            Kendall puts her hand on Giselle's shoulder. "What's the big deal? Seriously, is it because you don't have a date?"

            Giselle shrugs. "Kendall, the guys that asked me didn't want to go with ME. They knew going with me would get them closer to Meagan. They all like her. I'm a means to an end."

            Meagan shakes her head. "G, seriously, you can't believe that's the only reason they asked you."

            Giselle throws her arms out. "Meg, seriously, look at me.  I'm not you and I'm not Kendall. Why would they WANT to go with me?"

            Kendall is shocked. "G, you're beautiful! Stop selling yourself short."

            Giselle stands and says, "Whatever. I'm just not going. Period."

            Before either of them can keep razzing her, she gets up and walks out of the store. Sitting on a bench outside the store to wait for them, she calls AJ. When he answers, she says, "AJ, can you get Kendall and Meagan off my back?"

            Instantly in protective mode he asks, "Why? What did they do?"

            She whispers, "They won't leave me alone about the prom."

            He thinks Giselle is over-reacting. "Really? Who are you going with? What does your dress look like?"

            She sighs and says, "I'm NOT going so I don't have a dress."

            He doesn't understand. "Elle, you have to go. It's senior prom!"

            She counters with, "Well you're not going, why should I?"

            He sounds as frustrated as Kendall when he says, "Elle, that's not the same. I quit school. You know that."

            She throws it back in his face. "I know you didn't have to quit. Seriously, if I can't go with who I want to go with, then I'm not going at all.  Chucky, David and Miles all asked me. To get closer to Meagan. I'm not going to be a go between."

            He catches her slip up. "Elle, who do you want to go with?"

            She says, "What?"

            He quotes her. "You SAID ‘If I can't go with who I want to go with' so who do you want to go with?"

            She sighs and says, "That's not what I meant..."

            Cutting her off, he says, "Bullshit. Who do you think you're talking to?"

            She closes her eyes and says, "AJ, please..."

            A light goes off in his head. "Oh...now I get it. You want to go with Nick!"

            She blushes, thanking God he can't see her and she says, "What? Are you crazy?"

            AJ laughs and says, "I saw that kiss, Elle. We all did. You like Nick. Nick likes you. Ask him. Odds are it will be the only chance he ever has to go to prom."

            She's still unsure. "AJ, he's what, 16? You think that's a good idea?"

            AJ replies, "He's 17 and yes, why not? Geesh, don't tell me you don't like younger men. That's just...Elle, seriously, just ask him to go."

            She sighs and says, "AJ, what if...what if he says no?"

            AJ chuckles and says, "I dare you to ask him. He won't say no."

            In the background, Giselle hears Nick say, "Who won't say no, Bone?"

            Before she can say anything, AJ says, "Giselle's on the phone for you."

            The next thing she knows, Nick is saying, "Hey Giselle."

            Once again thankful it's a phone call and not face to face, she says, "Hi Nick."

            Quietly, he says, "So, umm, you wanted to ask me something?"

            Sighing, she says, "Well, yeah, I guess. I was wondering if...well...if you're not too busy, do you want to...umm..."

            When she trails off, he asks, "What, Giselle?"

            Giselle hears AJ say, "Nick, she wants you to take her to senior prom but she's too shy to ask."

            Giselle groans and whispers, "I swear I'm going to kill him."

            She can hear the smile in Nick's voice when he says, "You really want me to take you?"

            Meagan and Kendall come out of the store and both see the blush on Giselle's face. They stand and listen as she says, "Well, yeah, I, umm, thought about it. If you want to. And you're not busy."

            He's sounds interested to Giselle. "When is it?"

             "May 9," she answers, ignoring her friends as they look on.

            Kendall's and Meagan's mouths drop open when they realize Giselle is talking about the prom. They both stay quiet though, but each of them is dying to know who she's talking to.

            She can hear the smile in his voice. "Sounds like fun. Are you sure?"

            Relieved, she says, "Yeah, I'm sure. You really want to go?"

            Kind of shyly, he says, "I really want to see you again, so yeah, I really want to go."

            Her heart in her throat, she whispers, "OK, then...Sounds like a date."

            Meagan and Kendall jump and down and high five, causing Giselle to blush worse.  She says, "Get my number from AJ and call me later."

            Nick says, "I'll do that. Thanks for asking me."

            Smiling a goofy smile, she says, "Thanks for saying yes."

            When she hangs up, Meagan says, "AJ? Who did you ask?"

            It dawns on Kendall. "NICK! OH MY GOD YOU ASKED NICK!"

            Giselle blushes and says, "Yeah."

            The other girls hug her tight before Kendall says, "Come on, I know just the dress."

            Half an hour later, Giselle is walking out to Kendall's car carrying her prom dress.  It is a long, chiffon gown that is turquoise at the top that fades to white, and then turns into purple at the bottom. Kendall was right; Giselle fell in love with it. It combines two of her favorite colors, turquoise and purple.

            Once she's home, Paula comes into her room and says, "Let me see your dress." When Giselle shows her, she says, "Oh, Sweetie, that's beautiful. Who are you going with?"

            Giselle slowly zips the bag back up and says, "Nick."

            Paula says, "Nick? Nick Carter?" When Giselle nods, Paula says, "Honey, that's wonderful. You'll make such a cute couple. But you're gonna need heels for that dress so he doesn't make you look like a dwarf. Would you like to go shopping after school tomorrow and I'll help you find a pair?"

            Giselle looks up and says, "I don't want to impose...you've done so much for me already."

            Paula hugs her and says, "Stop it; you're a joy to have here."

            After she leaves the room, Giselle sits on the bed and thinks about how her life has changed.  She went from being a nobody to having a date for senior prom. A gorgeous date. Whoever thought it could happen to her?

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 06

            A couple of days before prom, Kendall calls Giselle almost hysterical. She's crying so hard she's hiccupping, but Giselle manages to get the gist of the problem.  Shawn broke up with her.  By the time Giselle gets to Kendall's house, Meagan is there and Kendall is somewhat calmed down.

            When they settle in Kendall's room, Giselle says, "What happened, Ken?"

            Kendall sniffs and says, "He's a douche bag of epic proportions." When neither of them say anything, she says, "He cheated on me with Stacy.  He got mad at me because I wouldn't put out and he broke up with me so he could score with Stacy again on prom night."

            Giselle puts her arm around her friend and says, "He's an ass.  You can do better."

            Kendall says, "I know, but PROM? How can I go alone?"

            Meagan says, "You don't.  Ask someone."

            Kendall says, "Who? It's two days away, everyone has dates."

            Giselle says, "Ask AJ."

            Meagan and Kendall look at her like she's crazy.  Finally Kendall says, "You're off your rocker girl, he won't go with me."

            Giselle says, "Ken, come on.  AJ's coming with Nick tomorrow.  Ask him."

            Meagan says, "How do you know AJ's coming with Nick?"

            Giselle says, "Nick told me.  Come on, Ken, ask him."

            Kendall shakes her head and says, "I can't. This will just make things worse."

            Meagan says, "What do you mean worse?"

            She says, "AJ and I talked when they were here last time. He said Shawn was just using me.  Now he'll rub my nose in it."

            Meagan says, "He will not. AJ's not like that."

            Kendall says, "He will. I don't need a pity date."

            Giselle says, "Yeah, I didn't either, yet thanks to all of you, I asked Nick. So are you calling AJ or shall I do it for you?"

            When she takes her phone out, Kendall lunges for it.  Giselle manages to keep it away from her and runs into the bathroom, locking the door. Kendall says, "G, don't! Seriously!"

            Giselle says, "I'm dialing unless Meagan tells me you are."

            After a minute of silence, Meagan says, "She's got her phone out, G."

            Giselle sends AJ a quick text that says, "DON'T make Kendall feel worse or I'll hurt you."

            His reply was simply, "WTF?"

            Giselle giggles and walks out of the bathroom just as Kendall is saying, "Umm, hi AJ."

            She and Meagan relax on Kendall's bed so Kendall walks out of the room for privacy. Once she's gone, Meagan says, "Did you text him anything?"

            Giselle says, "Just told him not to make her feel worse.  Or else."

            Meanwhile, Kendall walks into the family room of her house and says, "I'm ok, I guess."

            AJ says, "What's wrong? You don't sound like yourself."

            She says, "I'm not. Shawn dumped me."

            Waiting for the ‘I told you so' she's surprised when he says, "I'm so sorry Kendall."

            His tenderness makes her remember how she used to love him. How she still loves him. She says, "I just feel like a fool. You were right and I didn't listen."

            He says, "I wish I had been wrong." After a minute of silence, AJ says, "So, who are taking to prom?"

            She says, "Well...no one I guess.  Unless..."

            She can't see his smile but she hears it. He says, "Unless I want to rent a monkey suit and go with you?"

            He can't see her blush but he knows it's there. She says, "Did Giselle...?"

            He says, "I haven't talked to her in a few days, so how would she possibly tell me anything?"

            She says, "I don't know. It just seems weird asking you."

            He says, "How about this? Kendall, it would be my pleasure to escort you to your prom, if you'd consider lowering your standards for a night. I mean, I'm not a jock...I'm just a lowly singer."

            She laughs as he intended and says, "AJ, are you sure?"

            He says, "What color tie should I get?"

            After giving him the information he needs, she says, "I should have listened to you. I was just so mad."

            He says, "It's ok. I'm just sorry the prick actually is a prick. You didn't deserve this."

            She says, "When are you coming in?"

            He says, "Tomorrow. Nick and I will be at my house."

            Kendall says, "Is he as excited as G?"

            AJ says, "Yeah. He's nervous too. He had our choreographer work with him on dancing so he'd look good."

            Kendall giggles and says, "They make a cute couple. But we can't push them. You know how G is."

            AJ says, "I know. Nick's the same way. He's pretty awkward around girls right now."

            Deciding to bring back the AJ she's always known and loved, she says, "What, you haven't taught him all your tricks to become a ladies' man?"

            She can almost see his ego growing as he says, "Oh, you know me...I like to keep all my secrets secret."

            She laughs and says, "AJ, thanks for going with me."

            He gets serious and says, "Thanks for asking. I thought I'd miss going to prom."

            She says, "I'm glad you're not going to miss it."

            After hanging up, AJ sends Giselle a quick text message that says, "Thanks for the warning. I owe you one."

            Giselle is still smiling when Kendall comes back into the room. Kendall says, "What's so funny, G?"

            Giselle smiles at her and says, "AJ's excited about taking you."

            Kendall says, "You did say something to him!"

            Giselle says, "No, I didn't. You know better than that. He's really excited to be going with you."

            Still not sure she believes her, Kendall says, "Just don't interfere ok? We're not dating...we're just friends."

            Meagan laughs and says, "And where do the best romances start if not with friendship?"

            The girls decide to get ready at Kendall's house. Meagan's mom and Paula show up to get pictures of their girls with their dates. Giselle is giddy with excitement and grateful that Paula is treating her like her own daughter. She can't help but feel a little melancholy that her own mother isn't a part of this, but that relationship is finally over. Pushing away the sad thoughts, the butterflies in her stomach take over as the doorbell rings.

            The girls are in place on the stairs. Kendall at the bottom, being the tallest, two steps above her is Meagan, two steps above her is Giselle. When Kendall's mom opens the door, she greets AJ with a hug, but he can't take his eyes off his childhood friends. Especially Kendall. He whistles and says, "This can't be the same three girls that threw mud pies at me cause I said they looked too runny."

            All the girls giggle and Meagan's mom says, "AJ, look at you boys, you look so handsome." And they did. AJ and Brian had on black tuxes with ties to match their dates. Nick had on a white tux with a turquoise vest and tie to match Giselle's. When his eyes meet hers, neither of them can look away. Finally Meagan's mom says, "Come on girls, let's get some pictures of you with your dates and you can go have fun."

            AJ walks up to Kendall and extends his hand. When she takes it and steps up beside him, he says, "You really do look beautiful. Thank you for asking me."

            She smiles up at him and says, "Thanks for not saying ‘I told you so'."

            With a smile on his face, he says, "I'd never do that to you, Kendall. I never wanted to see you hurt."

            They walk into the living room as Brian holds his hand out to Meagan. Meagan steps closer to him and takes it, saying, "Thanks for coming."

            He says, "I wouldn't have missed it Meagan. Thank you for asking me. You look beautiful." She blushes as he leads her into the living room.

            Giselle walks down to meet Nick. He takes her hand and says, "You look amazing."

            She smiles up at him and says, "Thanks. You look great too." Blushing, she says, "Thanks for being my date."

            He smiles and says, "Thank YOU for asking me."

            Once all the pictures are taken, they kids get ready to leave. Meagan and Kendall's mom's both extended their curfews until 2:00 am. Giselle didn't ask Paula to do the same, but she pulls Giselle aside and says, "You're 18 now, Giselle. Technically, you don't have to have a curfew, but if you can be home by 2, I'd appreciate it."

            Hugging her, Giselle says, "I will be. Thank you for everything."

            Paula kisses her cheek and says, "You're family now, Giselle. Have fun."

            When the kids get into the limo hired for the night, AJ says, "OK, I couldn't do this in front of the mothers, but DAMN you girls look hot!" Kendall laughs and slaps his arm, Meagan beams, hanging onto Brian's hand and Giselle blushes, pressed closely against Nick's side.

            Brian says, "AJ's right. We've got the prettiest dates for tonight Gentlemen. So let's behave!"

He looks at Nick when he says it and Nick says, "What?"

            AJ says, "Oh, the girls don't know. Seems like Nick is a bit of a jokester."

            Kendall laughs and says, "Good thing he's G's date." Everyone laughs. Giselle catches Nick's eye and she can see he's embarrassed. She whispers, "Don't let him know he's getting to you. He'll back off if he thinks he can't ruffle your feathers."

            Nick smiles at her and says, "I don't mind. I do love pranks. I'd never pull anything tonight though."

            Lacing her fingers with his as if she's done it her whole life, Giselle says, "I never thought you would." When his eyes meet hers again, she whispers, "I mean it, thank you for coming."

            He smiles and says, "Believe me, it's my pleasure."

            When they step out of the car at the banquet hall, Kendall is beaming. AJ tucks her hand into his arm and says, "Let's show what a good looking couple we are."

            She giggles and says, "You do look good, AJ. I'm surprised you put on a tux."

            He smiles at her and says, "I'd do anything for you, Kendall." They walk in and pose for their picture, Kendall absolutely beaming with happiness. When she sees Shawn looking at her, standing decidedly alone, she almost laughs. Pressing tightly against AJ she smiles up at him, genuinely happy AJ is her date instead of Shawn.

            Meagan and Brian make their way inside, Brian covering Meagan's hand with his on his arm. He says, "I think it's safe to say I have the prettiest date here."

            She blushes as they pose for their picture, then she says, "Well I think I have the most handsome date, so it's a good thing we're together."

            He smiles and leads her away so Nick and Giselle make their appearance.  Meagan and Brian stand with AJ and Kendall and watch as Nick escorts her in the door. Kendall and Meagan almost start crying. Brian says, "What? What's wrong?"

            AJ says, "Brian, it's a long story.  Let's just say none of us ever expected to see Giselle looking as happy as she does right now." Turning his face to Kendall, he says, "I can't believe how she's changed."

            Kendall says, "She's away from that monster she had for a mother."

            AJ says, "Monster? What don't I know?"

            Kendall says, "I'll tell you later. Right now, let's enjoy the night."

            Nick has his arm around Giselle's waist which has her all excited and scared at the same time. Just before their picture is taken, she looks up at Nick and he says, "You really are so pretty Giselle."

            After the picture is done, he leads her out onto the dance floor, skipping refreshments all together. Once his arms are around her waist and hers are on his shoulders, she says, "I never thought I'd come to prom."

            He laughs and says, "Me either. But since I am here, I'm happy it's with the best date I could possibly have."

            She blushes and says, "You don't have to...I mean..."

            He says, "I'm serious Giselle. You're beautiful, you're smart, you're funny..."

            She blushes an even deeper shade of red and says, "Nick...thank you. I mean it."

            He smiles and her heart nearly jumps out of her chest. The world fades away when he leans down and gently kisses her cheek. When he pulls back he whispers, "I mean it."

            She whispers back, "I know you do. That's why it means so much to me."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 07

            As AJ and Kendall sip punch, AJ says, "Kendall, I'm serious, I'm really sorry about Shawn."

            She smiles at him and says, "I know, I appreciate that AJ. I just...I hated admitting you were right.  He never really acted like he wanted to...well, not with me anyway. Apparently Stacy had what he needed."

            Hearing the undisguised hurt in her voice, he says, "Kendall, if he wasn't the right guy, then he wasn't." Knowing he probably shouldn't be saying it, he whispers, "I'm glad you didn't sleep with him."

            Her startled eyes meet his and she says, "Why?"

            He traces the side of her face and says, "He's not good enough for you Kendall. You deserve the best."

            She smiles at him, glad to see ‘her' AJ is back, at least for tonight. She says, "I always thought you and I..."

            He says, "Yeah, me too. So have you...with anyone else?"

            She looks a bit uncomfortable and says, "Not all the way. But you have, right?"

            He blushes and says, "Sort of." At her confused look, he says, "I got a blow job."

            She giggles and he laughs with her. He hugs her close and says, "I guess I'm still holding out for you, Kendall."

            Seeing the twinkle in his eye and feeling his heartbeat under her hand, she says, "Maybe tonight we should..."

            His eyes bore into hers and he whispers, "Kendall, I've always wanted you. Always."

            She smiles shyly and says, "So, does that mean what I think it means?"

            He leans closer to her and gently covers her lips with his. After a tender, probing kiss, he pulls away enough to whisper, "I want you Kendall."

            Before they have a chance to sneak away, Meagan and Brian walk up, oblivious to the sexual tension in the air, and Meagan says, "Hey, where's Giselle and Nick?"

            Both AJ and Kendall have a hard time breaking their eye contact, but when they finally do, Kendall says, "I don't know."

            Brian says, "They're dancing."

            Everyone's eyes move to the dance floor. When Kendall sees how happy Giselle looks with Nick, she starts crying. Meagan moves beside her and hugs her, saying, "Kendall, what's wrong?"

            AJ wraps his other arm around her and Brian looks on with deep concern. Kendall hiccups and says, "It's just, she looks so happy. After everything she's been through...I didn't think she'd ever smile like that."

            Meagan hugs her and says, "Ken, I know what you mean. I honestly never thought we'd convince her to come to prom, let alone ask someone."

            AJ looks between the girls and says, "Why? What did I miss?"

            Kendall takes his hand and Meagan grabs Brian's. They move to a table and sit down. Kendall watches Giselle dancing with Nick and recounts the long talk they had with Giselle after she had moved in with Paula and Hoke Dorough.

            Kendall and Meagan are sitting on Giselle's bed, not sure what to do. Giselle is curled up in a ball, crying her eyes out. Paula had called Kendall because she wasn't sure what to do to help Giselle. When the girls arrived, Paula had let them into Giselle's room and for the last half hour, they watched their friend sob her heart out.

            When the tears finally subside, Giselle sits up and grabs a tissue. As she blows her nose, Kendall says, "Want to tell us what's wrong?"

            Giselle sniffles and says, "My mother, what else?"

            Meagan says, "What happened, G?"

            She says, "She was shopping at the market and got in line at my register. When she realized who I was, she started yelling at me."

            Kendall says, "What did she say, G?"

            Giselle says, "Same thing she always did.  She blamed me for my dad leaving. Said if she had just had the abortion like he wanted her too, they would still be together and she'd be happy."

            Meagan gasps and whispers, "What a cold hearted bitch!"

            Kendall starts crying with Giselle, Meagan not far behind. Kendall says, "Giselle, you can't let her do that to you. It's not your fault."

            Giselle sniffles and says, "What's wrong with me?  Neither of my parents wanted me!"

            Meagan says, "STOP IT! There's nothing wrong with you G! You're beautiful, you're smart, you're fun...it's not your fault."

            Kendall says, "She's right. G, it's their loss, not yours."

            Giselle looks at them both and says, "I know what you guys are trying to do, but you didn't see her. She hates me. My own mother hates me."

            Meagan says, "Maybe she's just not capable of feeling love, G. Maybe it's not hate. Maybe it's jealousy. She sees you for what you are and she's ashamed she was never like you."

            Giselle sniffles and says, "Yeah, right. She has boyfriends out the wazoo. I can't even get a date."

            Kendall says, "They aren't boyfriends, G. They are out for sex. She has no self-respect and spreads her legs for any man with a hard dick." When Giselle gasps, Kendall says, "I'm sorry, but it's true. Your mom is easy. You're not. I think Meg is right. She's jealous of you because you respect yourself."

            Giselle says, "I don't know."

            Kendall says, "G, listen. If she feels that way about you, there's nothing you can do that's ever going to change it. I'm sorry. Damn, I'm so sorry but you can't spend the rest of your life letting her make you feel this way."

            Before Giselle can reply, Paula knocks on the door before gently opening it. She says, "Is everything ok in here?"

            Giselle nods and says, "I'm sorry for the way I was acting Paula."

            Paula says, "You don't have to apologize. Everyone falls apart now and again. It's ok. I'm sorry I called your friends but I wasn't sure you'd be comfortable talking to me about whatever was upsetting you."

            Giselle says, "It's ok, Paula. Thanks for caring."

            Paula comes over and leans down, kissing her on the forehead. She says, "You're one of my girls now, Giselle. Of course I care." Stepping back, she says, "Dinner's at 6. You can both stay and eat if you want."

            After she leaves the room, Meagan says, "See Giselle, it's not you. Your mom just doesn't know what it is she lost."

            Giselle sniffles and says, "Thanks guys. I mean it."

            When Kendall finishes the story, Brian says, "Her own mother said that to her?" Meagan nods and he says, "Wow. I thought Nick's mom was bad."

            Kendall says, "Wait, what? Nick's mom?"

            AJ says, "OH yeah, she's something else. A real piece of work. Maybe that's why they bonded so well. Both their mothers are bitches."

            Kendall squeezes his hand and whispers, "Maybe that's why you and she are best friends, AJ. No Dad."

            He puts his head against hers and whispers, "I know. I need to talk to her about this."

            Meagan says, "Tomorrow AJ. Looks like tonight, Giselle is going to be Cinderella."

            Looking at his best friends dancing together, AJ says, "She deserves it."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 08

            Nick and Giselle are talking quietly about the upcoming album release when Tammy Thompson sidles up to them and says, "Hey, Giselle, right? I almost didn't recognize you." Batting her eyes at Nick, she says, "Who's your friend?"

            Once again feeling self conscious, Giselle says, "Umm, this is Nick. He works with AJ. Nick, this is Tammy."

            Nick smiles at her and says, "Nice to meet you Tammy." Turning his attention back to Giselle, he says, "Come on, let's get some punch and find the guys."

            As they walk away from the dance floor, Giselle says, "I think Tammy wanted to dance with you."

            He shrugs and says, "I'm not here to dance with her. I'm here to dance with you."

            Giselle can't help but feel giddy at his words. When they sit down with the others, she can tell something's going on. She looks around the table and says, "What?"

            Kendall laughs and says, "I just can't believe YOU weren't coming to prom, yet you're the only one of us that's danced tonight."

            AJ says, "Brian, I think that's our cue." Standing, he holds his hand out to Kendall and bows low before saying, "Milady, may I have this dance?"

            Everyone laughs as she puts her hand in his and says, "You big dork."

            Brian leads Meagan to the dance floor, once again leaving Nick and Giselle alone.  Giselle says, "Did I remember to tell you how handsome you look?"

            He sort of grins and says, "Yeah, but it's kind of nice to hear."

            Giselle says, "I think you'll hear it a lot when the record comes out. I can't wait to hear it."

            Nick says, "What, AJ didn't give you a sneak peak yet?"

            Giselle says, "No, he didn't."

            Nick says, "Shame on him. He should."

            She smiles and says, "I'm so excited. All he's ever wanted to do is perform."

            He says, "Me too.  Of course my mom always pushed me to do it. I don't think I would have been allowed to do anything else."

            Hearing his animosity toward his mother strikes a chord in her heart. She says, "I'm sorry Nick."

            He shakes his head and says, "Don't be.  As soon as I turn 18 I can do what I want.  Yes, now I only want to sing, but she won't be able to tell me what to do anymore."

            Hearing the animosity towards his mother in his voice, Giselle feels as if she's finally found someone who understands how her mother made her feel. Taking his hand, she says, "I know how you feel. I think if I had stayed with my mother, I'd be dead right now."

            He looks shocked and says, "For real?"

            She says, "No...I guess not. I just wasn't very happy living with her."

            He brushes the side of her face with his fingers and whispers, "I'm glad you got out."

            She smiles and says, "Me too."

            He looks around and says, "Hey, come with me."

            He takes her hand and pulls her across the banquet hall to a door hidden by a potted plant. She says, "What are you doing, Nick?"

            He says, "Trust me. We've been in enough hotels lately, I know what this is." He opens the door flipping on a light as he pulls her inside what turns out to be a storage room. Lining the walls are folded tables and chairs. 

            She looks around and says, "Nick, why are we here?"

            He steps closer to her and cups her face in his hands. She knows he's going to kiss her. She licks his lips as his head lowers. He sees the small action and smirks as he lets his lips capture hers. At first, she's kind of shocked. Then her body takes over and wills her mouth to open, inviting his tongue inside.

            He pulls her against his body and holds her tightly, his hands moving up to rub the bare expanse of her back. She shivers in his arms. He pulls back and says, "Are you cold?"

            She sighs and says, "No, just nervous."

            He smiles and says, "Me too."

            He steps away from her and pulls her over to the corner where one table is set up. He lifts her up and sits her on the table before letting his lips cover hers once again. She slides her hand inside his open coat and around to his back, allowing him to crush her breasts into his chest.

            He pushes her gently onto her back on the table, his body hovering over hers. Sliding his hand down to her knee, he finds the slit in her dress and lets it creep inside. When his fingers touch the flesh of her inner thigh, she gasps and pushes him away, saying "We can't, Nick. Not here."

            His eyes find hers and he realizes she's really not ready. Even though he's MORE than ready.  He sighs and says, "I'm sorry. I just...I like you a lot Giselle. You're so pretty...and so nice..."

            She sighs and says, "I'm sorry. Please, Nick, I want too...but I can't. Not here."

            He smiles and helps her sit up. He says, "It's ok. But I'm going to need a minute before I go back out there."

            She makes the mistake of glancing down and blushes badly. She says, "Umm, I'm going to the ladies' room. I'll meet you at our table in a few minutes."

After she leaves, Nick leans back on the table, trying to calm down. He's 17 and every chick he comes into contact with makes him hard. He can't deny he really likes Giselle. He'd love for her to be his first because he knows he'd be hers. That way, if he bungles it, she won't really know it.

Before he can leave the storage room,  the door opens and in walks Tammy.  She says, "I thought I saw you come in here. What, did little Miss Sweet and Innocent not put out?"

Feeling the overwhelming urge to defend Giselle, Nick says, "I got exactly what I wanted. And you better keep your mouth shut about Giselle."

Tammy says, "What?  Me say something? I would never."

He says, "Good. Thank you."

As he starts to walk away, she says, "Now hang on a minute." When he stops to look at her, she says, "I'm just curious..." Before he knows what happens, she pushing her body against his and pulling his head down to meet hers.

Without hesitation, he hauls her body against his and lets his hands creep down her bare back to cover her ass. She squirms against him and pulls her lips away enough to say, "You got a condom?" When he nods, she says, "Good."

Nick watches as she slowly unzips her dress.  He can't believe what's about to happen. Then they hear the announcement.  "This year's prom queen is Tammy Thompson!"

Tammy squeals and says, "OH MY GOD I WON!" She rushes out, leaving Nick wondering why the hell he can't just get laid.

By the time prom is over, everyone is back to feeling somewhat normal. Nick managed to ask Giselle if she was mad at him and the smile on her face assured him she wasn't.

When they go outside, Brian says, "Well, since we have separate cars to take us home, have a great night y'all." Meagan smiles and follows him to their waiting car. 

            AJ hugs Kendall close as he looks at Giselle. He says, "Elle, you really do look beautiful tonight."

            She blushes and says, "You should wear a tux more often AJ."

            He steps away from Kendall long enough to sweep Giselle into a bear hug. Turning to Nick, he says, "Take care of her Nick. Or I'll kick your ass."

            After Kendall and AJ leave, Nick says, "So...you're sure you aren't mad at me for what happened?"

            She smiles and says, "No, Nick. I'm flattered. I'm beyond flattered."

            He says, "No pressure here, but can I...can I kiss you again?"

            Looking around quickly, she turns her face to his and whispers, "Yes."

            He lowers his lips to hers; all the while hoping that once they get into the car things will get a LOT more intense. He really, really wants to get laid.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 09

            Once in their car, AJ and Kendall don't waste any time.  He pulls her across his lap and says, "Kendall, I don't know if I can wait."

            Straddling his lap, she squirms as his hands creep up under her dress and cup her buttocks. This is nothing they haven't already done, but she knows where it's leading. She's as nervous as she can be, but tonight, AJ McLean will be hers.

            She throws her head back as his lips move across her throat. She whimpers when he gently bites her neck as his hands creep up her sides and slowly tug the top of her dress down. When her breasts are free, he moves his lips to one of her nipples, sucking it into his mouth as he wraps his arms around her body and grinds her against his.

            When she feels the car start to slow down, she whispers, "AJ, we're almost to my house."

            He whines and whispers, "KENDALL..."

            She says, "Go home then double back here. Meet me in the pool house."  She pulls her dress back into place and grabs his head for a hot, steamy kiss before saying, "Bring a condom."

            She's out of the car before he can stop her. He watches her run into her house, not really sure he believes what's going to happen tonight.  When the car drops him off, he sneaks into his room. After shedding his jacket and tie, he reaches into his bag and pulls out a box of condoms. Deciding, well hoping, that he gets more than one chance, he shoves 3 in his pocket and heads back out.

            His mom's voice stops him as he's half way down the stairs. "Alex, is that you?"

            He curses and says, "Yeah, Mom, just got home. Gonna grab a sandwich."

            She yells back, "Need me to fix it?"

            Panicking, he says, "NO! No, you go back to sleep. I'm fine."

            He listens for him Mom's bedroom door to close, then he heads to the kitchen. He waits a full 15 minutes before sneaking out into the garage and grabbing his bike. 

            He groans as he takes off. He hasn't ridden in ages and one of the tires is flat. Not bothering to take the time to air it up, he struggles to make the 10 minute ride to Kendall's house.

            Once he gets there, he sneaks into the back yard and into the pool house to find her reclining on a chaise lounge waiting. When she sees him in the dim light of the camping lamp she brought out, she whispers, "I thought you changed your mind."

            He snorts and says, "You're kidding me, right? I've wanted this for 3 years."

            She giggles and sits up as he lowers himself down beside her. He slides his hands up her arms and she whispers, "AJ, I'm nervous."

            He leans forward and kisses her gently before whispering, "So am I."

            They methodically undress each other. When his chest is bare, she leans forward, licking one of his nipples. When he moans, she takes her lips away and says, "Do guys like that?"

            He says, "Fuck, Kendall, I love it. Don't stop!"

            She sucks one of his tiny nipples into her mouth as he slides his hands down her back then back up again. She takes her lips away and says, "What else do you like, AJ?"

            He smirks and says, "I like the idea of returning the favor." She moans as he pushes her back and lowers his head to her nipples. When he sucks one into his mouth, her body arches against him. He slides his arm around her waist and continues to nibble on her sensitive flesh.

            When she feels like she's going to explode, she whispers, "AJ, take off your clothes."

            He stands and strips, shocked to see her lean back fully on the chaise and spread her legs. He sees her hand between her legs and he nearly blows his load in his hand. He kneels on the floor by the chair and says, "I gotta...Kendall, please..."

            He moves her hand and slides his own over her cotton covered crotch. When he feels the wetness soaking the cloth, he moans. Pushing the offending material aside, he lets his finger slide through her sticky wetness and tease her clit. She moans and whispers, "Fuck, AJ!"

            He reaches up to capture her lips as she grabs her panties and lifts her hips. Once she's stripped them off, he openly strokes her as their tongues battle it out. She rips her lips away and says, "God, AJ, just fuck me!"

            He fumbles in his pants pocket and rips out a condom. She watches as he slowly rolls it over his manhood. When he sees her staring at it, he says "What?"

            She smiles and says, "It seems bigger than the last time I touched it."

            He grins and says, "It is.  Do you still want to...?"

            She spreads her legs and her arms and says, "Yes!"

            He positions himself between her legs and together they manage to work the head of his dick inside her. Breathing hard and fighting the urge to slam it home, AJ whispers, "Kendall you're so tight!"

            She grimaces and says, "Don't stop!"

            He presses in firmly, ripping away the barrier of her virginity. When she cries out, he stops moving and puts his lips on hers. Not knowing if it will help, he slides his hand between their bodies and draws circles around her sensitive little nub, causing her body to shake.

            As the pain subsides, Kendall whimpers at the onslaught of pleasure AJ's fingers are giving her.  Gasping, she says, "It doesn't hurt now. AJ, PLEASE!"

            He starts moving slowly, savoring the feel of her gripping every inch of his length. When she starts thrusting back against him, he growls and cums.  Both seem shocked and he mumbles something incoherent. She wraps her legs around him tightly and pulls his lips to hers.  After a deep probing kiss, she whispers, "It's ok, AJ. I'm not mad."

            He says, "Fuck, Kendall, I wanted to get you off with me."

            She smiles at him in the darkness and says, "AJ I came when you were sucking my boobies."

            He looks startled and says, "You did?"

            She smiles and says, "I can cum again...but we have to get you hard."

            He pulls out of her and says, "I'm not sure I can."

            She smiles and says, "I think you can."

            He looks shocked when she takes the condom from his dick and tosses it aside before leaning down and licking him. He whispers, "Kendall, what the fuck?"

            She says, "AJ, I have heard things. I know guys like this. You do like it, right?"

            He grabs her hair and says, "Fuck, yes, but..."

            She says, "It's ok, AJ. Your cum tastes good..." before she opens her mouth and proceeds to give him a blow job a hundred times better than Melissa had just a few short weeks ago. The combination of her mouth on him, PLUS the fact that he's watching her, has him hard again in moments.  Sitting back, she looks pleased with herself and says, "Told you so."

            He rips open a new condom and covers his length before saying, "Now we can try some things I saw in a movie." Grabbing her leg and putting it on his shoulder, he slides his body once more into hers. She's so tight, he moans and whispers, "Damn you feel so good."

            She plays with her nipples as he moves in and out of her like a well oiled machine.  After bringing her close, she whispers, "Wait." He pulls out and she gets on all fours. He gets behind her and positions himself.

Before sliding into her, he says, "How did you think of this?"

She giggles and says, "My brother has a couple of pornos. I watched them one night."

Knowing she watched porn turns him on like never before. He grabs her hips and moves in and out of her, faster and faster. Sweat is pouring from their bodies, but he doesn't even notice. All he knows is she's tight and he's loving how this feels.

When he feels close to letting go again, he slows down and pulls out. She gets up and he lays on his back. Now she straddles his body and guides his length inside her once more. Playing with her boobs as she rides him, AJ is blown away by how this feels. This time she cums. They both do.  After climbing off his body, AJ whispers, "Kendall...can I...taste you?"

She blushes and says, "Do  you want to?"

He grabs her and pulls her up till she's close to his head. Once again, she straddles his body, this time his face, and lowers herself to his waiting tongue. She's shocked by his first touch. He puts his hands between them and opens her lips, letting his tongue taste all she has to offer.

Kendall leans down and strips off the condom, letting her tongue clean him up as he continues exploring her inner folds.  He moans against her tender flesh, causing her to whimper.

She moves off him and turns around. He pulls her down into his arms and whispers, "Kendall, that was...WOW."

She says, "AJ, I'm glad it was you."

He says, "Me too. More than you know."

She says, "How did you know what to do?"

He says, "Well, I've watched some movies with Kevin and Howie on the bus."

She giggles and says, "I can't believe you watched porn!"

He laughs and says, "You did!"

She bites him gently and says, "Only because I wanted to do it right. I mean, after Shawn wouldn't, I just..."

He says, "Shawn's a fucking prick. I'm glad he didn't pop your cherry."

She says, "AJ, that's gross. Don't say it like that!"

He says, "Geesh, I'm sorry. Don't bite my head off. I thought you enjoyed it."

She says, "I did! Don't make it cheap."

He says, "Fuck, Kendall, what's wrong with you? I'm not making it cheap, it's just..."

She sits up and says, "It's just a piece of ass to you." Before he can stop her, she pulls her dress over her head. She says, "Maybe you should go."

He says, "Kendall, that's not what I meant. Fuck, would you chill out. I thought we both agreed tonight was special."

She says, "I thought it was. I thought you wanted..."

He looks confused as he pulls up his pants. He says, "What did you think I wanted?"

She refuses to cry in front of him, so she says, "Nothing. Go. Enjoy your new album, your groupies and all that.  Good luck AJ."

He says, "Kendall, what? What's wrong, tell me!"

She hugs him and says, "Nothing. See you later." She runs before he can stop her. Runs before he can see he broke her heart in two. She thought he was going to tell her he loved her. She thought he would ask her to wait for him. She thought he wanted her to be his girl.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 10

            When the car drops off Meagan, Brian walks her to the door. He leans close and kisses her gently. When their lips part, he says, "I really had fun tonight."

            She smiles and says, "I did too. Do you...wanna hang out a while? I can take you back to AJ's later."

            He says, "Well, yeah, if you're Mom and Dad won't mind."

            She says, "They won't. I promise."

            When they walk in, Meagan's dad comes out of the den and says, "Well, did you have fun?"

            Meagan says, "It was great Dad. Is it ok if Brian hangs out and watches a movie?  I can take him back to AJ's later."

            Her dad looks Brian over and says, "Sure, it's fine. Mom went to bed and now that I know you're home in one piece, I'm going. Good night."

            After he leaves, Brian says, "I can't believe he agreed."

            She laughs and says, "Only because he's here. Come on."

            She takes his hand and pulls him into her room, pushing the door closed.  He says, "Meagan, I don't think..."

            She laughs and says, "Brian, I'm 19. You're what, 20?"

            He says, "21."

            She says, "Then don't worry. Besides, you're not getting lucky tonight." At his somewhat sad expression, she giggles and says, "Not THAT lucky."

            He grins and pulls her closer to his body and whispers, "You looked stunning tonight." Then he kisses her.  A deep, meaningful kiss. When their lips part, he whispers, "I've wanted to do that a long time."

            She says, "Me too. Let me change."

            While she's in the bathroom, Brian takes off his jacket and tie, unbuttoning the top 3 buttons on his shirt. He sits on the edge of her bed and waits. When she comes out a few minutes later, he almost stops breathing. She's wearing a pair of short, short pajama shorts that barely cover her butt cheeks and a strappy tank top that accentuates her breasts.  She sees his eyes wandering over her body and she blushes. When their eyes meet, she says, "Maybe I should put the gown back on."

            He laughs and says, "Too late, the image is burned in my mind. You're gorgeous."

            She blushes and says, "So, what kind of movie do you want to watch?"

            He says, "Anything. I like all kinds of movies."

            They go back to the kitchen and make popcorn then back to her room and settle on the bed to watch Liar Liar. Even though, both had seen the movie, they laugh like crazy anyway. Meagan loves watching Brian imitate some of Jim Carrey's funnier faces.

            Near the end of the movie Meagan turns to find Brian staring at her. Before she can ask why, he closes the distance and kisses her. She scoots down on the bed and he lays beside her, his lips devouring hers as his hand slides up under her shirt to rub her stomach.

            Their lips part and she whispers, "Brian, I don't think..."

            He says, "Shh, it's ok. I know it's not time." He covers her lips once more, allowing his fingers to slide up and gently rub the underside of her breasts, causing her body to shiver. Their lips part again and he says, "Your skin is so soft."

            She whimpers and says, "Touch me again, Brian."  When he fully cups her breast and lets his thumb roll across her nipple, she whimpers and says, "Please don't stop."

            The continue to pet each other until they hear a suspicious thump. Brian pulls back, his fingers still rolling her nipple. She says, "I think that's Dad's subtle way of kicking you out."

            He smiles and says, "I should go." He kisses her gently and says, "Meagan, I know it sounds stupid, but I'm from a small town and this is how we do things. Will you be my girl?"

            She smiles and says, "It doesn't sound stupid, Brian. I'd love to."

            "I'll call a taxi so you don't have to drive me to AJ's."  He kisses her again and says, "How about dinner tomorrow night? We're leaving the next day for the tour."

            She smiles and says, "I'd love to."

            When she walks him to the door, he says, "I can't wait till tomorrow night. Sweet dreams, Meagan."

            After one last, lingering kiss, she whispers, "Sweet dreams, Brian."

            After he leaves, Meagan fairly floats back to her room. Falling back on the bed she stares up at the ceiling with a silly grin on her face. She laughs and says, "He's my boyfriend!"

            When the car Nick and Giselle were in stops in front of the Dorough's house, Nick gets out and walks her to the door. He holds her hand and says, "I'm really glad you asked me. I'm sorry if...well, I didn't mean to make you mad."

            She says, "You didn't, Nick, I promise. I just, I don't think we're ready for that."

            On the inside, he's aching to tell her he's ready, but instead he says, "Yeah, I guess."

            She looks up at him and says, "Nick, I'm not saying never. Just not yet."

            He smiles and leans down to kiss her. When their lips touch, he slides his hands around her waist and pulls her up tightly against his body. With her hands on his shoulders, she lets his lips take over and she loves every minute of it.

When his hands creep lower and cup her bottom, she knows she has to stop him. She gently pulls her lips away and says, "Nick...wait."

He says, "I don't want to wait. Giselle, you feel so good."

She sighs and says, "Nick, please. I'm just not ready for us to do this."

Deciding to try to play on her sympathies, he says, "But I want my first time to be with someone I really care about and I care about you." 

She says, "Nick, that means a lot to me but I'm not ready. I'm sorry. Please...I care about you too. I'm just not ready for that step."

He sighs, frustrated, and says, "Can we at least kiss some more? Please?"

She leads him to the porch swing and they sit together. He puts his arm around her and their lips move together once more. She puts her whole heart into it, trying to give him as much pleasure as she can. She doesn't even stop him when his hands move to caress her breasts. Until he pulls her gown down, baring one nipple. She pulls away, pulling her gown up and says, "Nick, I mean it. I can't."

Knowing he has to back off or piss her off for good, he says, "I know, I'm sorry. You're so beautiful, G...I love to look at you."

Thankful for the semi-darkness to hide her blush, she says, "Thank you Nick. I really did enjoy tonight. I'm so glad you were able to come with me."

He kisses her again gently and whispers, "Thanks for asking. Can I see you again?"

She says, "I'd love it. Are you coming back with AJ in August for the big beach party?"

He says, "I hadn't planned on it, but if you ask me too..."

She smiles and says, "I'm asking. Will you go with me?"

He says, "I'd love to. And I'll see you tomorrow. OK?"

She kisses his cheek and says, "I'd like that Nick."

After making sure she's inside, he goes back to the car and heads back to AJ's. Once there, in the safety of his room, he takes off his clothes and pulls out the picture of Giselle he managed to swipe from AJ.  Stretching out on the bed, he starts to jack-off, all the while wishing he was with her.  Someday soon, he hopes. Someday soon.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 11

            While the boys are hitting it big in Europe, the girls settle into routines with their jobs and prepare to go away to college. When AJ calls Giselle to tell him they are on their way home for some much needed relaxation, she's almost giddy. Nick had been calling her almost every day. Even though she gets the feeling he's lost his virginity, she isn't really mad. As much as she likes him, she's not sure she's ready for a physical relationship with him. She wants to get to know him.

            After talking to AJ, Giselle jogs to Kendall's house. Once there, they settle out by the pool and Giselle says, "OK, talk. Why do you seem so sad that AJ is coming home?"

            Kendall says, "I don't know if I can face him Giselle. We had a huge fight after prom."

            Giselle says, "No kidding. It was so cold when you two were around I needed a jacket. So what happened?"

            Kendall sighs and says, "We did it."

            Giselle is quiet for about 30 seconds before saying, "And?"

            Kendall says, "We had a fight after. I thought...well, I was stupid and thought he'd ask me to go steady. Be his girl. Wait for him. You know, like Brian did Meagan."

            Giselle says, "But he didn't?"

            Kendall says, "No, he said he was glad Shawn didn't pop my cherry."

            Giselle groans and says, "He didn't."

            Kendall nods and says, "It's ok, Giselle, really.  I'm not mad anymore or even hurt. I mean, how can I be? I've got Grant."

            Giselle smiles and says, "Yeah, you've got him wrapped firmly around your little finger. So how's that going Ken?"

            She laughs and says, "It's great. I can't believe we were friends in school but he was too afraid to ask me out."

            Giselle laughs and says, "Why was he afraid?"

            Kendall says, "AJ. He thought AJ and I was a hot item. Maybe we were then, but..."

            Giselle says, "How do you feel about AJ, Ken?  How do you really feel?"

            She thinks about it for a long time before she says, "I love him. But what I feel for him isn't what I feel for Grant. I mean, I'm glad he was my first. It seemed right. But, well, I don't think about him like that anymore."

            Giselle says, "Then don't worry about it. Treat him like you always have when he gets home. He seems to be really happy for you and Grant. Maybe friends are all you're supposed to be with him."

            Kendall says, "What about Nick? Are you excited to see him?"

            Giselle smiles and says, "Yeah, I am. I just hope he's...never mind."

            Kendall says, "Come on, talk! This is me; you know you can tell me anything."

            Giselle says, "Kendall, he wanted me to be his first after prom. I just...I'm not ready for that. I think I hurt his feelings when I said no."

            Kendall laughs and says, "Giselle, he's a GUY, they don't have feelings. Well, one. They get horny. I'm sure he's gonna try getting in your pants again when he gets here."

            Giselle blushes and says, "Geesh, Kendall!"

            Kendall laughs and says, "Giselle, do what feels right. If it doesn't feel right, say no. Nick's a nice kid. A bit on the rowdy side, from what Brian told Meagan, but I don't think he'll hurt you."

            Giselle smiles and says, "Can I tell you something kind of silly?"

            Kendall says, "Sure, shoot."

            Giselle says, "I really think Meagan and Brian are going to end up together forever."

            Kendall says, "Really? You think he wants that?"

            Giselle nods and says, "AJ's been telling me how Brian always talks about Meagan. How he misses her. His bunk on his bus is covered in pictures of her. He says he's never seen a guy this into a girl."

            Kendall smiles and says, "I hope he's right. Meagan is as nuts for Brian."

            Giselle says, "I know." After a brief silence, she says, "Ken, you gonna be ok with AJ?"

            Kendall says, "I think so. You're right; he's always going to be one of my dearest friends. Maybe that's all it's supposed to be."

            Giselle says, "Good. Now, for the other reason I came over."

            Kendall says, "What?"

            Giselle says, "I found us an apartment close to school. I think we can swing the rent if you, Meagan and I room together.  That is, if you still want to..."

            Kendall smiles and says, "Want to? Are you kidding? I'm so ready to get into my own place. Where Grant can come anytime he wants and my dad doesn't sit in the kitchen playing with his rifle."

            Giselle laughs and says, "Well, I've already talked to Meagan. We can move in next week. Paula and Hoke paid the deposit as a graduation present for me."

            Kendall says, "Giselle, that's...WOW!"

            Giselle says, "I wish they had been my real mom and dad. Everyone in their family has been so great to me. Howie calls me once a week to check on his ‘baby sister' as he calls me now."

            Kendall says, "You know, I think AJ hooked up with some great guys. And they sound amazing together."

            Giselle says, "I know. How is it we had AJ around all these years and we never knew he was THAT good?"

            Kendall says, "Cause we also know he's the AJ that farted in the lunch line and left slime on our locker doors at school."

            The girls both laugh and Giselle says, "I'm so glad he's coming home. I asked if he wanted to stay at our apartment. Is that ok?"

            Kendall says, "It's fine, but where will he sleep? He sure as hell isn't getting in my bed."

Giselle laughs and says, "He can sleep in my room. I'll get an air mattress. You sure you're ok with it?"

            Kendall says, "Yeah, but what about Nick?"

            Giselle chews on her fingernail and says, "I want him to stay too, but I don't want to get his hopes up.  I guess he can take the couch."

            Kendall says, "Or you can let him and AJ both sleep in your bed with you. AJ can keep Nick off your ass!"

            Giselle is shocked at what she said. Kendall jumps up laughing and starts to run. Giselle chases her until they both collapse in the grass. She says, "Kendall, I don't want to get all mushy and sentimental, but thanks for being my friend."

            Kendall hugs her and says, "Thanks for being mine. Don't worry, we'll figure out sleeping arrangements so the boy wonder can stay with us too. Who knows, maybe this time you'll tell him ‘yes'."

            As Giselle jogs back to Hoke and Paula's, she thinks about Nick and says to herself, ‘Yeah...maybe I will say yes.' 

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 12

            The girls are settled in their apartment when the boys get home. It doesn't take long for Brian and Meagan to disappear into her room to ‘talk'.  Giselle just smiles, knowing her friend is happy.  Kendall's still at work so she hasn't seen AJ yet. It's just AJ, Nick and Giselle and AJ says, "So, what's new Elle? Ready for college?"

            Giselle says, "I guess so."

            Nick says, "What's wrong?"

            Giselle says, "Nothing I guess. I'm just nervous about all the new people."

            AJ looks at Nick and says, "Elle's kind of quiet in a crowd. She tends to be shy."

            Giselle laughs and says, "Unlike you, Mr. Party boy!"

            He says, "I'll have you know, I'm all man Missy. Want me to prove it?"

            Nick seems shocked but Giselle just giggles and says, "You're not my type. Nick is."

            AJ clutches his chest and falls back on the couch.  He says, "What is it with Mr. Blondie here that gets women going?"

            She looks at Nick to see him blushing and says, "AJ, stop it. You're embarrassing him."

            AJ says, "I don't care. I seriously want to know, from a woman's point of view. What is it?"

            She glances back at Nick and even though he's blushing, he seems to want to know too. With her eyes locked on his, she says, "Aside from the fact that he's gorgeous, it's the smile."

            AJ scoffs and says, "Get real! Seriously, is it because he's the tallest so everyone assumes he's got the biggest dick?"

            Nick drops his head and Giselle says, "AJ, STOP IT!"

            AJ says, "What, come on, we're all friends here. I seriously want to know."

            Giselle says, "And I told you." Nick gets up and leaves the room and Giselle looks at AJ, saying, "God, how can you be so insensitive?"

            He looks genuinely puzzled and says, "WHAT? I'm not trying to be mean, I just..."

            She says, "AJ, you have a LOT to learn about women. We don't look at a guy for the size of his penis. I think it's only you that has sex on the brain 24/7."

            He says, "Elle, you think Nick doesn't? That boy wants to get in your pants so bad he can't stand it."

            Feeling anger toward AJ she's never felt before, she says, "Maybe I should let him!"

            She storms out of the room to find Nick in the kitchen. He doesn't look at her when she walks in. She says, "Nick, I'm sorry AJ is being such a jerk."

            He shakes his head and says, "No sweat."

            She steps closer to him and puts her hand on his back. She feels him tense up and she says, "He doesn't know when to shut up. I'm sorry."

            He turns to face her and takes her hand. He says "Really, it's ok. I just...well..."

            She shakes her head and says, "Nick, I love AJ. He's my best friend in the world. But he needs a filter on his mouth. I was serious in there. You are very good looking, but your smile...that's lethal."

            He smirks at her and says, "Really?"

            With her heart doing flip flops she says, "See, just like that."

            He laughs and says, "Thanks for letting me stay here."

            She says, "Not a problem. If AJ keeps being an ass, I'll kick him out, ok?"

            AJ walks in and says, "You'd really make me leave?"

            She turns to him and says, "If you don't apologize I will."

            AJ says, "Come on, Nick knows I'm jealous. Girls fall all over him."

            Nick snorts and says, "Yeah, fourteen year olds. That makes me feel really sexy."

            Giselle slides her arm around his waist and says, "Last time I checked, I wasn't fourteen."

            Nick's shocked look mirrors AJ's. AJ finally finds his voice and says, "I think I'll go visit my mom.  See you later."

            After he leaves, Nick looks at Giselle and says, "Really?"

            She shyly nods yes and says, "I do like you Nick. I'm just not...I mean, I've never."

            He says, "Me either. I was kind of hoping this week..."

            Smiling at him she says, "I don't know, Nick. Let's see what happens." Before he can say anything else, she says, "Let's watch a movie."

            As she making popcorn, Nick goes into the living room with a huge smirk on his face. He thought AJ was going to screw things up for him, but he ended up making Giselle admit she likes him. He sits on the couch wondering when will be the best time to make his move. Maybe while the movie's playing, he can cop a feel. Figure out exactly what she's got hiding under all those clothes.

            Giselle is excited that Nick still wants her. After prom she thought he'd be angry with her still. She's still not sure if she's ready, but she knows she feels things for Nick she's never felt for another guy. He treats her like a human being, not like some geeky nerd to help him with his homework. The only other guy that treated her that way was AJ and she never looked at him as boyfriend material. He was always just her best friend.

            When they settle on the couch to watch the movie, Giselle sits closest to the window, which is where the air conditioner is. About half an hour into the movie, she's freezing. Nick notices and says, "Want to turn the air off?"

            She shakes her head and says, "If we do, in twenty minutes we'll be sweltering. Maybe I should get a sweater."

            He says, "No, switch places with me." Once they switch, he says, "Come here." He pulls her into his arms and she snuggles up on his chest. She can't see his face, so she doesn't see the smile on his lips. Almost has her where he wants her. 

Settling in, he lets his hand slowly drift down her back. Before she knows it, he has one hand on her butt and the other on her thigh. When she tilts her head back, she finds him waiting, watching her. Slowly he lowers his lips and they kiss. She grips his shirt as the kiss deepens. He squeezes her butt as he tugs at her thigh, trying to get her on his lap.

And she lets him. She finds herself straddling his lap, kissing him as his hands cup her bottom and pulls her tightly against his body. He knows she feels his hard on. She squirms against it, pulling a moan out of him. Their lips break apart and he whispers, "Can we go in your room? I mean, we don't have to go all the way, but...Giselle, I really want to touch you."

She chews on her bottom lip and nods. They stand and move into her room. She makes sure the door is locked before losing herself in his embrace once more. She wonders if he knows he's the only guy she's ever kissed. Her thoughts of inadequacy are pushed aside when his hand slides up under her shirt to cup her breast. Even through her bra, the heat from his touch is amazing.

He can't believe how close he is. All he wants is to see her naked. Feel her skin and kiss her in all those secret spots. Sex with Giselle is his goal. He wants to be the one to take her virginity. He wants to be the man to show her what being a woman feels like. Even if he does have three girls in other countries waiting for him to come back, Giselle is the one he wants above all others. As he pulls her bra down and pinches her nipple, he knows it's only a matter of time.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 13

            Brian and Meagan lie on her bed for hours talking, kissing, cuddling.  He says, "I've missed you Meg.  I wish you could go with me."

            She says, "I do too. But with school starting..."

            He says, "I know. Maybe when you get a break?"

            She smiles and says, "I'll definitely come and see you."

            He says, "So, how have things been here? You like being independent?"

            She says, "So far, yes. If I was at home we wouldn't be doing what we're doing right now."

            He squeezes her and says, "And I'd be ok with that. Meg, I really...I'm falling in love with you."

            Surprise crosses her face. Surprise and adoration. She says, "I'm falling in love with you too, Brian."

            He kisses her again, just because he can't resist. What they both are feeling is something neither expected.  Brian slowly moves his hand under her tank top and gently rubs her smooth stomach. Meagan giggles in surprise.

Brian says, "You find that funny, do you?" His eyes glisten with mischief.

"You know I'm ticklish." Meagan gets out as he tickles her stomach and hips. She can't stop laughing and thrashing all over the bed. She starts pushing Brian off of her and they both fall off the bed.

When Meagan realizes what has happened, she is on-top of Brian. He stares at her with his bright blue eyes. Feeling brave she positions herself so she's straddling his body. Then she bends down to kiss him. Brian's hands move under her top and inch their way to her breasts. She likes the way it feels when Brian touches her like that.  Meagan moans against his mouth.

Brian breaks away from her and says, "Wow that was incredible. No girl's been able to get me hot and bothered like that just by making out."

"I know what you mean. Brian, I feel things for you that I never have." She gets up and moves back to the bed. She needs to put a little distance between her and Brian before they get carried away.

Brian gets up and moves next to her on the bed. He says, "Why did you leave me all alone down there?"

"I didn't mean to." Meagan smiles at him. "Bri, I'm so in love with you that I want to experience everything with you."

He beams at her with a cheesy grin and pulls her to him. "Does that mean making love?" He whispers in her ear.

Meagan says, "Of course it does. You know I'm not a virgin. It's going to be different this time. That was just sex. With you I want to make love."

He lifts her chin, so she's looking directly at him. Brian says, "When the time is right, it's going to be the most romantic night of your life."

"I can't wait." They both lean back on the bed and cuddle close together.

"So, do you think Nick is ever going to get lucky with Giselle?"

Brian places a kiss on Meagan's cheek and says, "He really wants to have sex with her."

"Knowing Giselle, she'll probably hold out a lot longer than he thinks she will." Meagan plays with Brian's hair as they talk.

He says, "There's nothing wrong with waiting until the time is right. I know that both of us have been with other people. I just want you to know that I'm going to count you as my first."

Meagan sighs. She can't imagine a guy sweeter than Brian. Every time she thinks things can't get better they do. She feels lucky to have found a guy like him.

Both of them look into each other's eyes. Their mouths meet in a passionate kiss as their hands start roaming each other's bodies. Both of them start to lose control due to the way they are feeling about each other. Brian's hands caress her breasts through her bra. Meagan wants to go further, but she knows that it's not the right time. They break apart as they both attempt to catch their breaths. Instead of talking, they just stare into each other's eyes.

Meagan decides it's time to break the silence and says, "So, what's up with AJ? Is he dating anyone?"

Brian answers, "Not really sure. He's been keeping his love life hush hush since the whole prom incident with Kendall."

"Well from what Kendall told me he was a jerk about it, but that's between them. They just weren't meant to be." Meagan said reflectively. They were both her friends, but Kendall and AJ were too much alike.  Ever since they were little the either got along or were in an argument.

Brian slides up a bit, so Meagan is leaning against his chest. He says, "She seems happy with Grant."

"Yeah, I think she is, but not as happy as I am having you in my life."

He says, "That's sweet, but this conversation is getting too mushy."

Meagan giggles and gets off the bed. She grabs a book off her desk and climb back on next to Brian.

"Oh is this your yearbook?" He asks with a grin.

She says, "Yes. I wanted to show you some of the photos I took."

They start looking at the various photos on school activities.  They laugh at the pictures of the girls goofing off at lunch. It's nice seeing them full of smiles.

Brian says, "It great to see how close the three of you are. That's how I feel about the guys, especially Nick and AJ. We tend to hang out more than the older guys. Howie and Kevin can go to clubs and stuff that we can't."

Meagan totally gets what Brian is saying. She wouldn't trade her friendship with Giselle and Kendall for anything.  It makes her happy that Brian understands her friendships and won't make her give them up for him. She says, "Yeah, I think both of us have some really great friends. I thank AJ every day for introducing you to me. Brian, I couldn't stop thinking about you after I met you."

Brian says, "I know. I'm that irresistible." He made a funny face and started to laugh.

Meagan laughed as she set her yearbook on the floor. She yawned and cuddled further into Brian's chest. He started playing with her hair, wrapping it around his finger. Contentment was what he was feeling when he spent time with Meagan. She was everything he wanted in a woman. Brian couldn't believe he found the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with. They were both so young, but he could picture them being together forever.

Brian noticed that Meagan's breathing had changed. He looked down and noticed she was asleep. He scooted both of them further down on the bed and placed the covers on their bodies. Brian wrapped his body around hers and fell into the most comfortable sleep.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 14

            Kendall is just finishing up the end of her shift at Steve & Barry's in the mall when AJ comes waltzing in. When their eyes meet, she knows everything between them is ok. She runs around the counter and jumps into his arms and squeals, "Oh my God, you're home!"

            He laughs and says, "Look at you!  Beautiful as ever!"

            She blushes and says, "Why are you here? Have you seen Giselle and Meagan?"

            He laughs and says, "Meagan and Brian disappeared 10 minutes after we got to your place and Nick and Giselle sure didn't need me hanging around.  Three's a crowd when you're horny."

            Kendall smacks his arm and says, "Be nice. I'm off in a few minutes. I want to take you to meet Grant. He's working at Lids."

            AJ hangs out as she punches out and grabs her stuff. When she walks out, he says, "So, Grant from school?" When she nods, he says, "He always did have a thing for you."

            She says, "That's what he says.  I just can't believe no one ever told me. And he wouldn't ask me out because of you."

            AJ blushes and says, "I know. I made it clear to most guys that if anyone messed with you, Meagan, Giselle or Lorelei, there would be problems."

            Kendall sighs and says, "Boy, Lorelei sure changed when she moved."

            AJ says, "I haven't heard from her in ages. What's going on?"

            Kendall says, "Giselle emailed her and asked if she could come for the party. Her reply was she has a new life and maybe it's better if she doesn't."

            AJ looks puzzled and says, "Wow, that doesn't sound like Lorelei. Especially to Giselle. Why didn't she tell me?"

            Kendall says, "You know her, AJ. She's trying to stand on her own two feet and be independent.  Paula and Hoke have been such a blessing. Make sure you thank Howie."

            AJ says, "I already did. Howie knows how important Giselle is to me."

            When they walk into Lids, AJ immediately starts picking up hats and trying them on. Grant doesn't see him at first and steps up to Kendall, sweeping her into his arms for a lingering kiss.  AJ sees it and smiles.  He knows he and Kendall have a history, but Grant is so perfect for her.

            When Grant sees AJ, he gets a little self conscious. AJ walks up to him and shakes his hand and says, "Hey Man, how's it going?"

            Grant says, "Um, fine, how are you?"

            AJ laughs and says, "Glad to be home, even if it's only for a week. Looking forward to the party."

            Grant says, "Yeah, me too."

            Kendall says, "I'm gonna take AJ to the food court. When you get off, come and find us and we'll hang out at our place tonight. OK?"

            He says, "I'll meet you, but I can't hang out. I have Jake's bachelor party to go to at the bowling alley. I can come by after if that's ok?"

            She leans up and kisses his cheek and says, "Please do."

            After they leave the store, AJ says, "Ken, I'm really glad you're happy. I'm really sorry about how I acted."

            She links her arm with his and says, "It's ok, AJ. We both acted out. I'm glad...I wanted to talk to you about this. Get it out in the open."

            He says, "What?"

            She says, "I'll always be happy you were my first, but...well, I just don't think we were meant to be more than friends."

            He sighs dramatically and says, "Oh Thank God, I was trying to find a way to say the same thing!"

            She laughs and says, "I doubt I was your first."

            He says, "I swear, before you, I had only had a blow job. You were my first. And you'll always be special, but we'd never work as a couple. You know me too well."

            She laughs at him and says, "I'm glad we're friends."

            After Grant has a snack with them, they leave the mall. AJ moves away from them to let them share a private goodbye. He smiles as Grant hugs and kisses Kendall. She looks so happy and her happiness is all he ever wanted.

            When they make it back to the apartment, Brian and Meagan are playing Trivial Pursuit. Giselle and Nick are still locked behind closed doors. Kendall and Meagan joke about it, but Brian and AJ share a look. Both of them know Nick's been around lately. AJ had wanted to corner him and warn him not to hurt Giselle, but Brian had stopped him. If you push Nick to NOT do something, he'll do it to spite you. But Brian knows, if he hurts Giselle, AJ will beat the crap out of him.  Meanwhile, in Giselle's room...

            Nick's on his back and Giselle is straddling his body, leaning down and kissing him. They've been kissing and making out for over an hour and neither seem ready to stop. In fact, Nick's almost positive this is it.  He has his hands up under her shirt playing with her nipples when he says, "G, please...I need you."

            She sits up and he pushes her shirt up and strips it over her head. He had long since pulled her breasts from her bra and finds himself staring at the protruding nubs aching for his tongue. He pulls her down and sucks one into his mouth as he cups her ass and thrusts up into her crotch.

            She moans and whispers, "Nick, we can't...not here."

            Leaning back, he looks puzzled and says, "Why not? This is your room and your bed. What better place to make you mine?"

            She sighs and says, "Meagan and Brian are here.  AJ and Kendall will be soon. I don't know if..."

            He says, "G, please.  Baby I'm so fucking hard for you, it hurts. I don't want to beg, but I will...I just need you. You're so sexy and so beautiful..."

            He pulls her in for another sensual kiss. She kisses her way across his face and whispers, "Nick..."

            He's surprised when she pulls back and grabs his shirt. He strips it off, being extremely shy about his body. She only smiles and leans down, kissing the center of his chest. When he squirms, she looks up concerned and says, "Is this ok?"

            He grabs he hair and moans, "Fuck, yes, God don't stop!"

            Even though she's nervous, his voice makes her tingle. She continues to lick her way down his chest as her hand strokes his crotch. Looking up, she whispers, "Take off your pants."

            He wastes no time in doing exactly as she says, proudly letting his hardened cock stand out from his body. She gingerly touches it, staring at is.  He reaches down and covers her hand and says, "Like this," as he starts teaching her how to masturbate him.

            Seeing her hand on his dick almost makes him cum. He plays with her hair, gently nudging her head down. He whispers, "Please, G, suck it. Please!"

She starts to take her hand off of him and says, "I don't...I've never..."

He says, "Please, Baby, just lick it! I want to see you lick it, please!" When she timidly licks the tip, he whispers, savagely, "Fuck that's good." She pulls back and he says, "God don't stop...just put it in your mouth.  Like a sucker. Do it, please."

When she opens her mouth and takes him into it, he tightens his grip on her hair and says, "Suck me Baby."

            She continues moving her head on his dick, feeling very self conscious about it as she pleases him. He grunts and says, "I'm gonna...if you don't want to taste...for the love of God!"  She sits back and watches as he covers her hand with his and moves it faster. He spews his load across his stomach and her hand. Giselle is almost giddy that she made him do that. And really turned on.

            He sees her squirming and he whispers, "Come here, G."  When she stretches out beside him, he opens her pants and pushes his hand inside. He'd give anything to see her pink flesh, but for now, he'll settle for feeling it. She's so wet, he almost caves and strips her.

            Holding back the urge, he lets his fingers slide over her slit as he suckles on her breast. She squirms and thrusts against his hand. He pulls his lips from her skin and moves up beside her, watching her face. He whispers, "Let go G. Cum for me."

            Her eyes meet his and she whispers, "Nick!"

            He smiles and says, "That's it Baby...let me feel you."

            When she spasms around his fingers, the wetness that coats his hand shocks them both. It shocks her even more when he pulls his hand from her pants and sucks on his fingers. He smiles at her and whispers, "You taste so good. Baby I can't wait to lick you and suck you and make love to you like I want to. It's gonna be amazing."

            She blushes and he hugs her close to his nude body. She lays on his chest and he says, "You mean so much to me G. I've dreamed about you for so long."

            She sighs and says, "Me too."

            He chuckles and tilts her head back for a lingering kiss. When their lips part he whispers, "Very soon, I'm going to make you mine G. And it's gonna be amazing."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 15

            Around 1:30 in the morning, everyone starts getting sleepy. Even though she and Nick are a lot closer, Giselle leaves him to sleep on the couch. When AJ comes in to sleep on the air mattress in her room, he says, "What, no Nicky in here?"

            She turns her back on him and lays down, saying, "If you're gonna be a jerk, get out."

            He sits behind her on the bed and says, "Elle...I'm sorry, I was just kidding."

            She sighs and says, "AJ, stop teasing him, ok? It really bothers him."

            He's quiet for a minute and then he says, "Elle, before you go to sleep, can I talk to you? Seriously?"

            She sits up and turns to face him, saying, "What's wrong?"

            He says, "Nothing.  I just...I want to talk about Nick, ok?" She nods and he says, "I know that Nick likes you.  But, he's been...around, Elle. Don't...don't let him talk you into...anything...if you're not ready."

            Thinking about what they did, she blushes.  AJ averts his eyes and she says, "We didn't.  But AJ, even if we did..."

            He says, "I just don't want you to let him con you, ok?  I love him, I do. He's a really good friend. I just don't want you to get hurt."

            She hugs him and says, "I'm a big girl, AJ. I've been through a lot. Nick won't push me to do anything I'm not ready for ok?" He nods as he hugs her. She says, "I do like him, AJ."

            He sighs and says, "I know. I think he likes you too."

            After she hears AJ snoring quietly, she thinks about what he said. He ‘thinks' Nick likes her.  Nick's ‘been around'.  Nick said he hadn't...I mean, it was obvious he'd been with a girl, but he swore he'd never done anything with anyone. That he was as much a novice as she was. So why does AJ's warnings bug her so much. Deciding to find out how Nick really feels, she crawls out of bed to go ask him.

            The place is dark. She tiptoes into the living room to find the couch is empty. She looks everywhere. No Nick. She goes back to her room and grabs her cell phone and heads outside to call him. Unfortunately, it's dead because she didn't plug it in, so she grabs AJ's.

            Once she's outside, she finds Nick's number in his phone and places the call. When he answers his words are kind of slurred and he says, "What? Fuck AJ, I'm busy, what do you want?"

            She hears a decidedly female voice say, "Who's AJ?"

            Clearing her throat, Giselle says, "It's not AJ. It's me."

            He says, "G? Giselle, what..."

            She says, "I wanted to spend some time with you. I came out and found you gone. I was worried. Now that I know you're ok, I'll leave you alone."

            He says, "G, wait, it's not..."

            Before he can say anything else, she turns off the phone, feeling like a fool. Then again, they don't have a ‘commitment' as it were. No one made promises. But after what they shared, Giselle just assumed...well, we all know what she assumed.

            She sits on the porch a long time, trying to figure out what she's going to say to Nick. When AJ sits beside her, he scares the daylights out of her. Before she can scream, he clamps his hand over her mouth and says, "Whoa, it's me Elle. What's wrong?"

            She sighs and says, "Nothing. Just thinking. Why are you up?"

            He hands her her cell phone and says, "It kept ringing. You didn't turn it off when you plugged it in."

            She takes it and says, "It's Nick."

            He sighs and says, "What did he do?"

            She says, "Why don't you ask him when he shows back up. I'm going to bed."

            He says, "Giselle, listen. He's young and he's a guy so that makes him stupid. It wasn't that long ago I let my dick do all the thinking. I think he really likes you."

            Thankful he can't see her blush, she says, "It's ok, AJ. I'm not his girlfriend and he doesn't have to answer to me."

            She stands up and goes back in. He sits on the porch and waits. Less than ten minutes later, Nick shows up. Even in the moonlight, AJ can see he's staggering. When he makes it to the porch, AJ says, "Nick, I swear to God if you hurt Giselle I'll kick your ass."

            Nick says, "I don't want to hurt her AJ. I just...I couldn't sleep, I went out. No big deal. I didn't realize I needed PERMISSION."

            AJ grabs his shirt and says, "This isn't about getting permission you dickhead. It's about a girl who's in a fragile state of mind that for some unknown reason decided to fall for you. If you don't want to be in a relationship then stop ACTING like you do and tell her. If you're with her or not, I don't care, but I will NOT let you hurt her. Understand?"

            Nick snorts and says, "Oh look at you, Mr. High and Mighty.  You fuck anything that moves and Lindsay is supposedly your girl. What's gonna happen when you go back to New York? Gonna conveniently forget all the other women and once again be her man?"

            AJ says, "My relationship with Lindsay is none of your concern."

            Nick says, "And mine with Giselle is none of yours. She's an adult AJ. She makes her own choices. I'll apologize for sneaking out and drinking, but what happens between us is none of your God damn business."

            Before Nick can go inside, AJ says, "I mean it Nick. Don't hurt her."

            When Giselle gets up the next morning, she's not sure what to do. She took the next four days off work to spend with AJ and Nick. Now she's wishing they'd call her in. Before she can call and ask for hours, AJ sits up and says, "Good morning. How did you sleep?"

            Seeing him shirtless is nothing new.  But why is it seeing him sleepy and shirtless making her feel funny? She says, "Fine. You?"

            He says, "Giselle...we need to talk."

            She shakes her head and says, "No we don't. Nick doesn't have to answer to me."

            AJ throws aside the sheet and crawls into bed with her like it's an everyday occurrence.  He lays down beside her on his side and says, "Listen...I know you like Nick. He likes you. Last night, I think he was feeling a little out of sorts cause I was in here and he wasn't."

            She stares at him and says, "But AJ..."

            He says, "I'm not saying do the guy...but he could have slept in here and me take the couch."

            She sighs and says, "But he was with a girl last night."

            AJ says, "He was at a bar getting hit on. He was here less than ten minutes after you came in, freaking out. You need to talk to him."

            She says, "He really came back?"

            AJ smiles and says, "He did. Just talk to him ok? And tonight, I'll take the couch...ok?"

            She hugs him and says, "Thanks AJ. I'm sorry if I snapped last night."

            AJ jumps up and gets dressed, saying, "Don't worry about it." He kisses her cheek and says, "I'm going outside for a smoke. Just...remember what I said."

            After he leaves, Giselle feels a little better. It concerns her that Nick was drinking, but knowing he came back...well, maybe he does care. Before she has time to dwell on it, there's a timid knock on her door. Thinking AJ forgot something, she raises her voice and says, "I'm decent. Come in."

            When Nick walks through the door, surprise is etched on her face. He says, "G, before you kick me out...I want to say I'm sorry."

            She says, "Nick, there's nothing to apologize for. You're an adult. You don't have to answer to me."

            He says, "But you're kind of my girlfriend. I shouldn't have left last night."

            She says, "You...think I'm your girlfriend?"

            A look of horror crosses his face and he says, "Don't you? I mean, after yesterday, I thought..."

            She says, "Me too, but you never said anything and well..."

            He says, "Can we back up a second?" She nods and he says, "Do you regret yesterday?" She blushes and shakes her head ‘no'. He says, "Do you...would you...want to be my girlfriend?" She nods shyly. He comes over to the bed and sits beside her. He whispers, "Good morning, G."

            She leans closer to him and whispers, "Good morning Nick."

            When he kisses her, her body immediately responds and he knows it.  He can feel her nipples harden through the thin tank top she's wearing. Groaning, he pushes her back on the bed and stretches out beside her, bringing his long body down to partially cover hers.

            When their lips part, she whispers, "Would you...want to sleep in here tonight?"

            Keeping his excitement under control, he says, "Only if you want me to. What about AJ?"

            She says, "He can sleep on the couch."

            Nick laughs and says, "Do I have to sleep on the air mattress?"

            She says, "Only if you want to."

            His smile makes her ache. He says, "I won't push...well I'll try not to push. But Giselle..."

            She says, "I'd like you to sleep in my bed."

            Before he can reply, Kendall knocks on the door and says, "Come on Giselle. We're getting ready to hit the beach. This party's gonna rock, let's GO!"

            Giselle keeps her eyes locked on Nick's and says, "We'll be down soon."

            Nick leans down and kisses her once more. When their lips part, he whispers, "I'm...I really like you Giselle. All I can think about is being with you."

            Knowing she's falling hard for him, Giselle whispers, "I really like you too, Nick."

            He kisses her again and says, "I'm glad you're my girlfriend."

            She whispers, "Me too."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 16

            The beach party ended up being the biggest party of the year.  Almost 200 people showed up, including Kevin and Howie. After a lot of prompting and begging, especially from Giselle, the guys did sing a few songs. While everyone cheered them on, Giselle was in awe. She knew AJ was good, but he sounded even better now. And Nick? WOW.

            After the impromptu show, everyone breaks off into smaller groups.  Some go swimming, some playing volleyball. Other's are eating and Nick? Nick picks up an oversized beach towel and slings it over his shoulder and then takes Giselle's hand and says, "Want to take a walk?" She nods, wrapping her floral sarong around her waist.

            When Nick had first seen her in her bikini, it was all he could do not to cum in his trunks. She had a body to stop traffic. Funny thing is, she didn't know it. She didn't even have on a teeny weeny bikini. Just your basic hipster trunks and a halter top.  But to Nick, (and most of the other guys) she was showing them things they never knew she had.

            When they take off down the beach, Nick can see AJ watching them as he sips a beer. He remembers AJ's warning and in all honesty, he really doesn't want to hurt her. But he's wanted her since he was 15 and he finally realized what girls could do for him.  She's like an addiction and he has to get his fix.

            They walk for quite a while before he stops her and pulls her into his arms. Looking down the beach, he sees the party is out of sight. He looks around and sees an outcropping of rocks and says, "Let's go over here."

            They make their way behind the rocks to a small secluded area with a  tide pool.  Nick spreads the towel out on the sand and sits down, pulling her between his legs. She snuggles against his chest and they start making out hot and heavy.  He kisses her deeply as his hand rubs her breast gently through her suit. She tries to pull away. He pulls his lips from hers and says, "Shh, it's ok. No one can see us. Baby I just gotta touch you, you look so damn sexy."

            It doesn't take long for Giselle to fall under his spell. His words, his hands and his lips have her body aching. When he pulls the strings and unties her top, she moans. He pulls her up till she's on her knees between his legs and his lips pay homage to the overly sensitive orbs before him.

            She runs her fingers through his silky hair, feeling things she's never felt before. When she whimpers, he smirks against her nipple.  He gently bites it, eliciting a gasp from her body. He pulls back and says, "Baby, I'm sorry..."

            She rubs his cheek and says, "Don't be...it...felt good."

            He returns to her nipples, giving each an over abundant amount of attention as his hands slowly untie her sarong. When she feels his fingers slip between her legs, she sees stars. He gasps at how wet she is.  He whispers, "Giselle...I want to see you. I want to taste you."

            She blushes but lets him push her down onto her back on the towel. He stretches out beside her and continues his assault on her neck as he lets his fingers slip under her bikini bottom and over here wet slit. When she bucks up against his fingers, his body throbs in response.

            He moves to kneel beside her and works her bottoms down her legs. She blushes as he openly stares at her womanhood. She tries to close her legs, but he stops her, holding them open. As his fingers slide between her sensitive lips, he whispers, "Fuck how beautiful you are!"

            She's scared to death when she sees his head dip lower and his tongue come out. At the first touch, she feels her body spasm like it did the day before, when his fingers were in her pants. He moans against her pussy, licking up her flavor as her body hurls toward a second orgasm.

            By now, Nick's ready to explode. Suddenly, he stands and strips off his trunks. Reaching into the pocket, he pulls out a small foil packet and Giselle watches him roll the condom over his dick.

            Even though she sucked him yesterday, she's kind of shy about looking at it. It's so big. She's petrified it won't fit inside her, even though she knows a woman's body is built for sex.

            When he's between her legs, she whispers, "Nick, I'm scared..."

            He leans down and kisses her, whispering, "It's ok...I won't...I'll go in just a little."

            When she feels him pushing into her, she gasps...it doesn't hurt yet...he rubs her clit, causing her to shake.  He stops moving, trying to let her become accustomed to his size, but she's so tight, he loses control. Grabbing her hips, he pushes into her as fast as he can, not bothering to stop when he feels the resistance of her virginity.

            He doesn't realize she's crying for him to stop. The pain she feels is overwhelming. She's begging him to stop, trying to push him off, when he finally hears her. He stops moving, looking down at her. She's sobbing uncontrollably. When he looks between their bodies and see the blood smeared on the condom, he gets scared. But his erection just keep throbbing cause she's wrapped so tightly around him. 

            He leans down, kissing her cheek and whispering, "Baby, I'm so sorry...Baby..shh, don't cry. You just felt so good."

            She whimpers in his arms. He holds as still as he can, trying to let her get used to how big he is.  He kisses her neck and shoulder, whispering over and over, "G...Baby, don't cry, please."

            The pain in her body ebbs...even though he's still inside her, the discomfort begins to lesson. Feeling the tension leave her body, he can't stay still anymore. He starts to move, pressing in and out of her tender body.  She bites her lip and groans, wishing it was over.

            It doesn't take long for Nick to cum. He holds her hips tightly and lets his body go, filling up the condom.  As he collapses against her, she lets her tears fall unhindered. When he realizes she's crying, he freaks out. He whispers, "G? G, Baby..."

            She moves away from him and says, "DON'T! Don't touch me!"

            He watches her turn on her side away from him. He lets his eyes roam over her body. He sees the blood on her thighs and part of him feels remorse. Being honest with himself, he's thrilled he was her first. But hurting her wasn't part of the plan. He slowly runs his hand down her back and says, "Giselle..."

            She hiccups and says, "Leave me alone."

            He whispers, "No, I won't...Baby...I'm so sorry I hurt you. I didn't...I mean, I've never...I didn't know it would hurt you like that."

            She sniffles, knowing he didn't really mean to cause her that much pain. Slowly he slides up against her and presses his lips to the back of her neck. Knowing there's only one possible way he gets out of this without AJ killing him, he nuzzles her neck and whispers, "Giselle...I love you."

            After they just lay together for a while, Nick says, "You ok, G?"

            She nods and says, "Yeah. I'm sorry I freaked out."

            He watches the curve of her hip, feeling his body start to harden. He scoots back a little so she won't feel it and says, "I'm sorry I hurt you. I swear, I never realized...you just felt so good."

            He can't see her face, but she knows she means it when she says, "It's ok Nick. It's never supposed to be good for a woman the first time."

            He kisses her shoulder and says, "I...I still wish I had been more careful."

            She turns over and says, "Maybe next time..."

            Hearing her words, a slow smile spreads over his face. He says, "I hope soon."

            She pulls him down and kisses him gently. When he lifts his head, she says, "I don't know..."

            He stands and puts on his trunks before she sees his dick is getting hard again. She grimaces and says, "I can't go back like this."

            He glances at her, then seeing her embarrassment, he turns his head and says, "What if I wet my t-shirt and you clean up with that? We can throw it away. No one will see it."

            She pulls on her bikini top and says, "Thanks Nick."

            She watches him walk to the edge of the tide pool.  Before he can dunk his shirt, she says, "Nick, wait...I can just get in the water...you don't have to ruin your shirt."

            He tries not to watch as she slips into the water. All he wants to do is join her.  Once she's done, she gets out and dries off with her towel. After redressing, she sits beside Nick on a rock. Their eyes meet and he says, "You really ok?"

            She leans closer to him and says, "I'm really ok."

            He puts his head against hers and says, "Still my girl?" She nods and kisses him gently. They snuggle for a few minutes, and then stand to make their way back to the party.

            When AJ sees them come back, he knows.  Part of him is furious, but he looks at Giselle's face and he doesn't see anything to make him think Nick hurt her.  Nick catches AJ watching them. He turns to Giselle and whispers in her ear before making his way to AJ.

            When he stops in front of AJ, he says, "What?"

            AJ says, "Just remember what I said Nick. Don't hurt her."

            Nick forces a smile, resisting the urge to brag he was her first, and says, "I won't AJ. I love her."

            AJ watches as Nick walks away. Cursing, he throws away his beer bottle and heads off the beach, promising himself to keep a close eye on Nick when they start touring. He won't let Giselle be hurt by a player. Even if it means blowing everything he's been working for. She's more important than the group, right? 

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 17

            Nick and Giselle did make love again.  The rest of their visit was fun, but Giselle could tell something with AJ had changed. He barely spoke to her. The night before they were set to leave, Giselle pulls AJ aside and says, "Want to tell me what I did wrong?"

            He says, "Nothing."

            She says, "Why are you all of the sudden avoiding me?"

            AJ says, "I'm not. It's just painfully obvious you've got Nick. You don't need me."

            Tears sting her eyes and she whispers, "AJ...you're my best friend."

            He says, "Then take some friendly advice...Nick's a player, don't ever think he's not."

            When he turns to walk away, she says, "What, I can't ever have a boyfriend? I'm supposed to be the celibate little virgin the rest of my life while you can fuck anything that moves?"

            He says, "That's not what I mean, Elle. I just think Nick isn't what you want him to be. I don't want you to be hurt."

            She snorts and says, "Newsflash, YOU are the only one hurting me, AJ."

            Before he can answer, she runs away. He curses himself for not being more cautious of his words, but Giselle is an adult and has to make her own choices.  Even if he thinks it's the dumbest thing she could possibly do.

            When Nick finds her crying, he's instantly on edge. Sitting on the bed with her, he says, "What's wrong G?"

            Looking at him through tears, she says, "What are you after Nick?"

            He says, "What do you mean, G?"

            She says, "Us. Where are we going? Is this real for you?"

            He bites his tongue for minute before saying, "I do love you, G. But I'm not gonna make you promise to wait for me. I don't know how long I'll be gone and I don't want to ask you to wait when you could find someone who can always be here for you."

            Cursing herself for being so naïve, she says, "In other words, it's ok to fuck me but you don't want a commitment."

            He says, "NO! That's not...I just...G I do love you, but I can't promise I'll always be here. Not now."

            She watches him and says, "But it's ok if I'm available for a quickie when you ARE in town, right?"

            He smiles, completely oblivious to the fact that she's being sarcastic. He says, "Well, sure, if you want. We are great together, aren't we?"

            She turns and says, "Get out! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

            He says, "G? What? I was just being honest!"

            She says, "And I was a fool. I actually believed you when you said you loved me. I actually let you have the one thing that was mine alone to give. And you took it! I bet that made your day, didn't it Nick? You fucked the brainiac that was too stupid to see she was being used." Picking up his duffle bag, she flings it at him and says, "GET OUT! GET OUT!!"

            Everyone comes running as she's shoving him out into the hallway.  AJ stands at the end of the hallway, guilt weighing down his heart. He knows he caused this. Now she's really hurt. He pushes Brian aside and says, "Elle, talk to me."

            She looks at him and says, "You did your talking. You were right, are you happy now? Are you all fucking happy?" She slams the door and locks it, leaving them all standing there with their mouths open.

            AJ turns slowly to Nick and says, "I TOLD you not to hurt her!  I TOLD you!"

            Nick says, "Man, I didn't do anything. I love her, you know that. She just flipped out."

            Kendall says, "You guys get out of here. Let me talk to her."

            AJ says, "Ken..."

            Kendall says, "AJ, just go. I don't know what's going on, but I'll take care of her."

            After they walk away, Kendall knocks on the door and says, "Giselle, it's me. Everyone's gone, let me in."

            Giselle unlocks the door and Kendall comes inside. After re-locking the door, Giselle says, "Kendall, how could I be so stupid?"

            Kendall says, "What happened?"

            Sniffing, Giselle says, "Nick and I...all he wants is sex." Between hiccupping sobs, she says, "He...only...wanted...to...fuck...me!"

            Kendall puts her arm around her and says, "Giselle, you don't know that.  He's young. We're all young. I'm sure he cares a great deal about you."

            Giselle sniffs loudly and says, "He just told me he doesn't want me to wait for him...he doesn't know when he'll be back.  He didn't really want a girlfriend, he just wanted a virgin...and he sure got one!"

            Kendall says, "Did he say that, Giselle?"

            Shaking her head, Giselle says, "He didn't have to. I asked if he just wanted me to be his fuck buddy when he's in town and he agreed.  And AJ...he thinks to warn me AFTER I sleep with Nick?  What the hell?"

            Kendall says, "Giselle, come on, AJ's your best friend. If he had said something to you about Nick, would you have listened?"

            Giselle says, "That's not the point, Ken."

            She says, "It is, Giselle. Maybe Nick is a giant ass, but he didn't rape you, right?"

            Shaking her head, Giselle says, "No, I wanted him."

            She says, "But you thought it would be more than sex."

            Giselle nods and says, "He said he loved me, Ken. I believed him when  he said it."

            Kendall says, "Maybe he does. Like I said, he's young. Give it time. We all need time to grow up."

            Giselle hugs Kendall and says, "Thanks."

            Kendall says, "You want to talk to Nick?"

            Shaking her head, Giselle says, "No. Not now. I can't."

            Kendall says, "What about AJ?"

            Giselle sniffs and says, "I don't want to lose my friend over this."

            Kendall says, "You won't. I'll send him up."

            When Kendall gets downstairs, AJ says, "Is she ok?"

            Kendall nods and says, "She's fine." Looking at Nick, she says, "YOU need to grow up. Don't tell a girl you love her if you're just trying to get in her pants!"

            Nick's mouth drops open and he says, "I DO love her. I just don't want to make promises I don't know if I can keep."

            Kendall says, "Well, guess what, saying ‘I love you' is a promise, Buddy. You better learn what the word means before you mess up someone else's life. You can stay here tonight, but stay away from Giselle.  She's been hurt enough." Turning to AJ she says, "She wants to talk to you. For God's sake, think before you open your damn mouth again."

            AJ says, "Geesh, Kendall, I get it."

            When AJ gets to Giselle's door, she opens it slowly to let him in. Once inside, he says, "I'm sorry Elle. I should have...I should have butted out and kept my mouth shut."

            She said, "You should have talked to me about Nick before I did something stupid."

            He sighs and says, "I know. But I kept hoping he meant what he said. I know you like him a lot."

            Giselle says, "Liked. Past tense."

            AJ says, "You don't mean that Elle."

            She sighs and says, "No, I don't." After taking a deep breath she says, "AJ, why can't I just have something NORMAL in my life?"

            AJ kind of chuckles and says, "Nick is NOT normal, Elle."

            She laughs and says, "I made a fool of myself, huh?"

            He shakes his head and says, "No, you didn't. You have every right to be angry.  I'm sorry, Elle. I wish Nick had a normal life for you. But right now, our lives aren't even our own."

            She says, "AJ, promise me no matter how crazy life gets we'll always be friends."

            He hugs her and says, "I promise Elle. Always."

            But, his promise didn't last very long. The first few months after the boys left, he called her at least twice a week. Nick called a few times, but things between them just weren't the same.

            As Giselle dove into college life, the boys calls became less and less frequent.  Meagan spent more time gone with Brian than she did at home, so she dropped out of college.  Kendall did very well in school. Even better when Grant moved in with her.  With Meagan gone most of the time with Brian, they really needed the third roommate for rent. And it made Kendall's life complete to have him there.

            They really were a perfect fit.  At the beginning of their sophomore year, Grant proposed. Of course Kendall said yes. Giselle was thrilled for them the night they made the announcement. But when she got home and was alone in bed, she had a good, long cry. First she lost AJ, then Meagan, now Kendall would be moving on with Grant.

            After a fitful night of sleep, Giselle wakes up determined not to let Kendall know she was upset. She dresses carefully because she has a big job interview today. When she makes it downstairs, Grant is leaving. He whistles and says, "Knock ‘em dead, Giselle."

            She smiles as he leaves.  They act like it's a big thing, but it's not. She's hoping to go to work in a big chain drug store in their management internship.  IF she can get this job, it will give her an income to afford a place of her own and a chance to travel a bit if they give her the internship. Management isn't really what she wants out of life, but it's something she's good at.

            She finds a note on the table from Kendall. "Early class. Good luck! Text me WHEN you get it!"

            Typical Kendall, cheering her on. As Giselle eats her breakfast, she thinks back to the last time she talked to AJ.  It had been over six months before. He had said, "You know Elle, you pushed me to be the best I can be. Everything good that's happening now is because you believed in me."

            She sniffles, pushing away her plate.  She did believe in AJ. She still does. She just misses him so much. She wanted to share her stories with him about school and her goals...but the last two times she called, he never called back. They finally grew up...and grew apart.

            When Giselle comes home that night, Kendall and Grant are waiting on her. Kendall jumps up and says, "Well? Did you get it?"

            Giselle forces a smile brighter than she feels and says, "I did! I start in two weeks!"

            Kendall hugs her and says, "Oh my God, Giselle, that's AWESOME!"

            Grant hugs her too and says, "Congratulations!"

            Giselle says, "Thanks guys.  I'm really excited."

            Kendall says, "Then why do you look like your cat died?"

            Giselle says, "You know me and my nerves. I gave myself a migraine while I waited. I'm gonna go lay down."

            Kendall says, "Want me to bring you anything?"

            Giselle says, "No, I'll sleep it off. You guys enjoy your night."

            After sleeping for over two hours, Giselle leaves her bedroom to grab a snack for dinner. Before she makes it into the kitchen, she hears Grant and Kendall talking. Grant says, "Kendall, I know it's not easy, but you have to tell her. We can't live with her the rest of our lives. We need a place of our own."

            Giselle bites her lip and chokes back the tears. Kendall says, "I know, Grant. But...I just don't want her to think I'm pushing her away."

            Grant says, "You're not Kendall. She's always going to be your best friend and I'm happy about that. You need each other."

            Pasting on a happy face, Giselle breezes into the kitchen and says, "He's right, you know, Ken. We'll always be friends, but you guys need privacy. Which is why I've been apartment hunting."

            Kendall says, "You what?"

            Giselle says, "Ken, I love you guys, but Grant's right. When you get married, you won't need me around. I have enough money saved up to get a place and the new job will more than cover my rent."

            Kendall says, "Giselle...it's just gonna be so weird..."

            Giselle says, "Stop it right now!  This is a happy occasion, we are NOT going to cry."

            Kendall sniffs and says, "You're the best, Giselle."

            A month later, Giselle is settling into her new, studio apartment. It's one big room, minus the door that gives her privacy in the bathroom. As she's hanging artwork on her wall, her phone rings. Imagine her surprise to hear, "Hey, G, it's Nick," after she answers.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 18

            After getting over the initial shock, she says, "Hi Nick. How are you?"

            He says, "Good. You?"

            She says, "I'm great. Just moved into my own place and I have a new job."

            He says, "Great. That's great."

            When he lapses into silence she says, "What's wrong, Nick?"

            He says, "I miss you."

            Hearing the longing in his voice she's feeling herself, she says, "I miss you too."

            He says, "Really? You do?"

            She says, "Yes, Nick, I do. Things might have ended badly when you were here, but I never stopped caring."

            He says, "I'm glad. I, umm, I wanted to know...can I visit you?"

            She says, "You're back in the US now?"

            He says, "Yeah, we have a 2 month break.  I was hoping I could maybe spend some time with you. We could talk. I mean really talk."

            Covering up her sadness that they are back and she hasn't heard from Meagan or AJ, she says, "I'd like that Nick. When will you be in town?"

            He says, "Couple of days. We're all in New York right now.  Brian and Meagan are heading to Kentucky. Howie is going to see Paula and Hoke, Kevin's going to work on his wedding and AJ went to LA with Shelby."

            Fighting back tears, Giselle says, "I'd love to see you Nick. What about your family?"

            He says, "I haven't spoken to them in forever. I'd much rather spend it with someone that means something to me. YOU!"

            His words make her feel all tingly. She says, "I have to work four days a week, but I'd love having you here."

            He says, "What about school?"

            She says, "In another week and a half I'll have a 3 week break. How long would you like to stay?"

            He says, "Forever. But we'll play it by ear. I don't want to get in your way."

            Something's telling Giselle Nick's really depressed. She says, "You're not gonna be in the way. Call me and let me know when to pick you up at the airport, ok?"

            He says, "Great. Thanks." After a minute, he says, "How's Kendall and Grant?"

            Smiling, she says, "Doing great. They are planning a Christmas wedding.  She's so excited."

            Nick says, "That's good.  Seems like everyone's happy these days."

            Giselle says, "You're not, Nick. What's wrong?"

            He says, "Can we talk when I get there?"

            She says, "Of course we can."

            He says, "Thanks, G. I knew I could count on you."

            When she sees Nick at the airport on Friday, she's amazed at how he's changed. He looks so tired. When he pulls her into a bear hug, she feels the tension leave his body as he whispers, "Thank God!"

            She steps back and says, "What?"

            He says, "I'm tired of all this shit. I missed you like crazy."

            Falling in step beside him, they head to baggage claim.  As he's pulling his suitcases from the belt, he says, "You look good, G. How's the job?"

            She says, "It's intimidating, but I kind of love it. Everyone's been very helpful."

            He says, "If you were my boss, I'd do ANYTHING you wanted."  When he wiggles his eyebrows up and down, she laughs. He says, "I'm serious. One look at you, and I'd get on my hands and knees and scrub the floor."

            She slaps his arm and says, "I'll remember that."

            Once his bags are in her trunk, she turns to move to the driver's side door. He stops her, swinging her around to face him. When their eyes meet, he says, "God I've missed you!"

            When his lips land on hers, she's stunned...and also thrilled. After a kiss that makes her blush from head to toe because an airport shuttle full of people drove by cheering, Nick says, "So, you have your own place. Sure you have room for me?"

            After getting into her car, she says, "Of course I do. I have to work tonight, but I'll be home by 10:30. If you want to drop me off and pick me up, you can use my car."

            He puts his hand on her thigh and says, "Nah, I'm just gonna chill out. Maybe watch a movie.  I'm tired."

            Covering his hand with hers once they are out of the parking lot, she says, "You look tired Nick. Now why don't you tell me what's been going on?"

            He sighs and says, "When we're performing it's amazing.  I love being on stage.  But then, well...off stage, the guys...we're all changing."

            I say, "What do you mean changing?"

            He says, "Well Kevin and Howie both are serious with their girls.  Kevin's getting married and I think Howie will too.  Brian used to hang out with me all the time but now that Meagan's on the road with us, I hardly get to see him.  And AJ..."

            When he trails off, she says, "What about AJ, Nick? Is he ok?"

            Nick says, "Honestly, I don't know. He's gone crazy getting tattoos. He's smoking more and, well..."

            She says, "Please tell me, Nick."

            He says, "I caught him once doing coke.  He said he just tried it and he wasn't gonna do it again."

            She's stunned by what he said.  She pulls into a Wendy's parking lot and turns to Nick, saying, "Drugs? AJ?"

            Nick says, "I don't know. But...he's different. Don't you hear it when you talk to him?" When she lowers her eyes, he says, "OH G, I'm sorry. I thought he was..."

            She says, "Don't worry Nick. He's got a lot going on. I didn't expect daily calls." Taking a deep breath, she starts the car again. Once on the road, she says, "What's the deal with this Shelby girl? I thought his girlfriend's name was Kate."

            Nick says, "He's got a different girl in every country it seems.  He's...he's different G. I'm kind of worried about him."

            The rest of the ride is made in silence that's only broken when a song comes on the radio Nick likes. Once at Giselle's apartment, he says, "You're not mad at me, are you G?"

            She shakes her head and says, "No, not at all. I always worry about AJ. He's just...He doesn't call me so I don't know what's going on."

            Nick flops down on the sofa and pulls her down beside him. Hugging her close, he says, "Thanks for letting me come here, G. I really didn't feel like spending my time off alone."

            She says, "You're welcome to stay as long as you want, Nick."

            He kisses her cheek and nibbles across her face to her lips.  He slowly works his tongue between her lips, sliding it along her teeth.  She whimpers and lets her tongue meet his in a sensual dance.  He runs his hand up her arm to her neck and strokes her cheek with his thumb. When their lips part, he says, "For all the ways I hurt you before, I am sorry, G. I didn't mean to."

            She leans against him, snuggling under his chin. She whispers, "It's ok, Nick. We were young and neither of us ready for what happened."

            They lay in silence for a while. Finally, she sits up and says, "I have to get ready for work. Do you need anything?"

            Giving her what has become dubbed ‘the Carter smirk' by the fans, he says, "Only thing I need is you."

            She smiles and says, "Still horny like a teenager, huh?"

            He blushes and says, "When it comes to you, yes."

            She laughs and says, "Yeah right. I'm gonna go get ready for work."

            Before she can stand, he pulls her onto his chest and leans back, working his knee between her legs.  Pulling her face to his, he grinds his knee up into the cleft of her thighs, moving his hands down to her butt to pull her even harder against him.

            She whimpers in his arms, her body writhing under the heat of his touch. When she pulls back to look at him, he whispers, "I meant it, G. You make me ache. I need you."

            She puts her hands on his chest and says, "But Nick..."

            He says, "Just...think about it, ok? I mean, if you say no, then you say no. I'll just jack off a lot. But I want to touch you again, G. I want to hold you and feel your body against mine. I've missed that. I've missed YOU!"

            She stares into his eyes...not sure if she can trust him.  Finally, she whispers, "I have to get ready for work. Can we...talk about this tonight?"

            He sits up and kisses her gently, saying, "Yes. G, I swear...I've missed you like crazy."

            Putting her forehead against his, she says, "Against my better judgment, I've missed you too."

            He smiles and says, "Need help getting ready for work?"

            She giggles and says, "Nope. I can do it. Why don't you take a nap."

            He hugs her tightly and says, "You're JUST what I needed Babe. Thanks for letting me stay."

            After she slips into the bathroom to get ready, Nick pulls out his cell phone to make a quick call to his bodyguard, Tim. When he answers, Nick says, "I'm here dude. That's $500 you owe me."

            Tim says, "Nuh huh, the bet was you get in her pants.  And you have to have PROOF Nicky boy.  I'm not taking YOUR word for it."

            Nick says, "If you think I'm...forget Tim, I am NOT taking pictures of myself fucking her."

            Tim says, "Good. I don't want to see your dick. But surely you can find SOMEWAY to prove it. Otherwise, you owe Billy and me EACH $500."

            Nick says, "Don't you worry, Asshole. You'll get your proof."

            After hanging up, Nick laces his fingers behind his head and closes his eyes. His body tightens when he thinks about how tight Giselle was when he first made love to her. He can't wait to feel her wrapped around his dick again. He really hopes he can get her to blow him this time and let him cum in her mouth. That's his new fantasy.

            When she comes out of her room wearing black slacks, a blue blouse with a black blazer over it, he whistles and says, "Wow, look at you. All professional!"

            She laughs and smoothes her hair out.  Picking up her purse, she says, "Sure you don't need anything?"

            He walks over to her and cups her face to kiss her gently. When his lips leave hers, he says, "I only need you G. Come home soon."

            She smiles and says, "I'll be here at 10:30. See you later."

            Once in her car, she closes her eyes and tries to control her breathing. She had wanted to stay strong, but his kisses drove her insane. Her whole body is throbbing with lust.

By the time she gets to work, she's managed to get herself under control. She sits down with the manager and goes over what is expected of her for the night. Pushing aside all thoughts of Nick, she focuses on the tasks at hands. Soon enough, she's going to be home. Then she has to decide whether or not to let Nick in again. If she does, how can she stop him from hurting her this time?

Chapter 19

            After leaving work, Giselle calls Nick, asking if he's hungry.  He surprises her by saying he's taken care of dinner, for her to just come home.

            When she gets there, she's more than shocked to see candles on the table, wine chilling in a wine bucket that she's not even sure she ever owned, and Nick standing in the kitchen stirring something in a pan.  When he hears her, he says, "Good, you're home. Hope you like stir fry."

            She says, "Well, yeah, I do. But...Nick, wow, you cooked dinner for me?"

            He says, "Sort of. Hope you're hungry."

            She takes off her blazer, laying it over the back of the chair, and kicking off her shoes. She watches Nick put the stir fry on plates and sits them on the table before he turns to her. She walks toward him, determined to keep her wits about her, until he touches her.

            He slowly slides his hands around her waist and whispers, "Hey Beautiful." He lowers his lips to hers and her resolve fades fast. She clutches his arms as his mouth plunders hers in an erotic dance.

When their lips part, she looks into his eyes and she knows she's lost. She whispers, "Nick...maybe we can eat later?"

He can't hide the look of euphoria on his face and he doesn't even try.  He pulls her more firmly against his body, letting her feel his hardness pressing into her stomach. He whispers, "God I've missed you, G."

He carries her to her bed, all thoughts of food forgotten, as she starts to unbutton her blouse. Nick licks his lips, completely mesmerized by the skin she's uncovering.  He wants to taste it...he wants to taste all of her.

And she lets him.  When her blouse hits the floor, he swoops in and starts on her neck, letting his hands slide up her back to unhook her bra.  When it hits the floor, he lets his fingers slowly roll over her sensitive nipple, urging it to pucker as he pushes her against the bed.

When they are tangled in the sheets, and in each other, Nick whispers, "G, are you sure?"

Somewhere deep inside, she knows she's not ready for this again. But she needs him. She ACHES to feel him. To feel some kind of love.  She pulls him up over her body and whisper, "Please, Nick...."

When he slips between her legs, she spreads them willingly, her body crying out to be filled. She knows in her mind that for him, it's probably just sex, but she doesn't care.  Right now, she just needs to feel loved. She needs to feel beautiful and sexy.

This first night together since the weekend at the beach seems to be a turning point.  Nick focuses on her. He makes her feel sexy and loved. Sometime around 4:30 am, Nick whispers, "I didn't...G, I didn't come here expecting you to make love with me. I can't tell you how I feel right at this moment."

 While he's plying her with all the right words, he's trying to figure out what kind of proof he can show Tim and Billy.  Finally, he whispers, "G...I want to take you on the road with me."

She looks at him, completely puzzled by his bizarre question. Finally, she says, "Nick, I can't...I mean, school, my job..."

He says, "I know, I know...can I at least...well, can I take a picture? Of us together? Here? Just something I can look at at night, knowing my girl is waiting for me to come home."

She says, "Nick, I've never...I don't know..." Then it dawns on her what he said.  His girl?  She says, "Your girl? You mean you're asking me?"

He nods and whispers, "My girl. So when we're overseas and I'm all alone, I can see a picture of us together, just like this...and know you're here waiting for me."

She snuggles against his chest, making sure she's completely covered before letting him snap a picture.  She says, "Nick..."

He says, "Don't worry. No one will see it but me. I promise." All the while, in his mind, he's thinking about the thousand dollars he just won and what he can spend it on.  Maybe a drum kit?

As they settle into a routine at home, work steadily picks up for Giselle. Six weeks after Nick arrived, she's offered the chance to go to California to work. Of course, she wants to take it, but her school is in Florida.  After discussing it with her academic advisor, she decides she can't pass up the opportunity. He sets it up for Giselle to transfer to a college close to where she'll be working in LA and advises her to take a quarter off to get settled.

When she comes home with the news about LA, Nick is ecstatic. LA is a big town. Plenty of places he can get lost for some fun while she's working.  What he doesn't realize is, it's going to take her a month to move.  He goes back on the road in 2 weeks.  Time for Nick to tell another lie because he wants to let loose and have some fun before the touring starts again.

She comes out of the bathroom after a somewhat lonely shower to find Nick brooding, looking out the window. She says "What's wrong Nick?"

He says, "I gotta go back to New York. Our vacation's been cut short."

She doesn't even try to hide her disappointment.  She slides her arms around his waist and says, "But you can come visit me in LA when you're back.  Right?"

He wraps his arm around her and says, "Of course. I just don't want to leave you G. I love being here with you."

She says, "It's nice having you here, Nick."

While she works on dinner, he makes some quick arrangements to head to New York. Even though he's managed to score with a couple of cuties on the beach while she's working, he's really looking for some action. The kind of action he KNOWS she won't be into. 

After their nice, cozy supper, he leads her into the bedroom, hoping and praying he can coax one real blow job out of her. It took forever to get her to touch him there, how he's gonna get her to suck him, he has no clue.  Then, he has an idea.

As she's getting ready for bed, which lately meant brushing her teeth and hair and slipping in naked beside him, he finds the pay per view channels on her television and orders some porn. He has it paused when she comes back in, looking very virginal in her long, white terry cloth robe. Knowing he's the only man to ever slide between her legs makes him feel masterful.  And a tiny bit shameful. When she drops the robe, he swallows hard, licking his lips. When she scoots closer, she says, "What are you watching?"

He smiles, trying to look nervous, and says, "Something I hope you'll be ok with watching."

Feeling curious, she says, "What?"

He starts the show. When she realizes it's porn, she stiffens. He says, "Please, G? I've never...I never watch with the guys. They think I'm a kid."

She blushes and says, "But Nick..."

He kisses her temple and says again, "Please?  Baby, just one, please?"

She looks up into his eyes, realizing that she loves him too much to say no. She snuggles in against him and they turn back to the screen. He wants to pump his fist in triumph. Instead, he pushes the covers down off of them, letting his fingers roam over her body as the man and woman on the screen heat things up.

She notices how his body reacts as the woman slowly starts giving the man a blow job on the screen.  She's fascinated at how his body hardens watching the scene play out. As if she isn't there, he lets his hand roam from her body to his and he starts stroking his shaft.

She turns to look at him, seeing his face is a mask of lust. She turns back to the screen, watching the woman seemingly enjoying pleasuring her co-star with her mouth. Licking her lips, Giselle wonders if Nick wants her to do that.  She turns back to find him watching her. His eyes say it all. She leans down and kisses his chest before turning back to the screen to watch what the woman does.

When she slides down his body, Nick wants to shout ‘YES!' as loudly as he can.  He runs his fingers through her hair as she tentatively licks the side of his shaft. He moans and whispers, "G, that's so good."

Feeling more confident, she slowly works her tongue along his shaft, acutely aware of how his body is tensing under hers.  She moves her mouth from his body and says, "Is this right?"

He says, "It feels like Heaven, Baby, PLEASE don't stop."

By the time he's ready to blow, she's found all the places that make him tick. He wants to cum in her mouth so badly. He grabs her head, threading his fingers through her hair and whispers, "I'm gonna cum, G!"

She starts to take her mouth off his body, but he surges against her, forcing her to take the first shot before he lets go, allowing her to move away from him. She gags as he strokes himself, continuing to climax all over his stomach and thighs. 

She sits back, still gagging as he gasps for air. He grabs her, pulling her forward and kissing her deeply. This she didn't expect. He seems to get off tasting himself in her mouth.  As he pulls away, he whispers, "My turn."

She closes her eyes, almost scared of what that means.  He moves between her legs and positions himself where he can see the television and pleasure her too.  Currently on the screen, the leading lady is in the middle of a manage a tois with a man and another woman.

Before she can get her wits about her, she feels him gently probing her opening.  She thinks it's his fingers then realizes he's put his tongue inside her. She grips the sheets as his tongue does things to her she didn't know was possible.  When he presses it against her love button, gently circling it, all hell breaks loose in her body. She feels the wetness surge between her thighs and hears Nick moan against her slit.

As her body calms down, he slides up over her, pressing his mouth to hers.  Tasting herself on his tongue is as foreign to her as sucking him was.  He doesn't give her a chance to pull away. His tongue squirms in her mouth as it did in her womanhood, touching every place it possibly could.

When their lips part, he whispers, "G, you taste...oh my God, you taste incredible."

She blushes, her entire body still aching and trembling. He snuggles beside her, and they once again return their attention to the movie.  Only now, the leading lady is being taken from behind. Becoming more comfortable with him and what they have done, she whispers, "Nick, maybe we could..."

He doesn't even try to hide his excitement.  He grabs a condom from the bedside table and slides it over his erection.  He puts her on her knees, facing the television. Nothing could prepare her for what happened next.  He probed until he found her opening then he pushed in hard, causing her to whimper.  He reaches up, grabbing her hair and knotting it in his fist as he plunges in fast and hard.  Even though it hurt at first, but he's got her so turned on, she can't help but moan with him. 

He looks over, realizing he can watch himself fuck her in the mirror over the dresser. Knowing she can't see what he's doing, he quickly grabs his camera.  He takes several pictures before tossing it aside, grabbing her hips and picking up the pace.  When he feels her body clench around his, he falls forward, planting himself deep and letting go of his load.

When she collapses on the bed, he pulls out of her and strips off the condom, not noticing the small stream of semen that drips from the end.  After tossing it, he climbs in bed and snuggles up with her.  Neither of them watch the movie.  They just cuddle close together and kiss. 

When they finally have their breathing under control, Giselle says, "I wish you didn't have to go early."

Thinking if she's willing to do this for the next two weeks, he'd be happy to change his plans, he says, "Me too. But you know how it is." What she doesn't know is his buddies found some strip clubs in New York that show it all and the girls are willing to really "perform".

They manage to right themselves in the bed and Nick whispers, "You're amazing G.  Thanks for letting me come here to stay."

She kisses his cheek and whispers, "I'm glad you called Nick. I...I love you."

He kisses her nose then nuzzles it before saying, "Me too."

As she drifts off to sleep, he closes his eyes, proud of himself that he got exactly what he wanted out of this trip and more.  And Tim thought he couldn't do it. "Dumbass," he mutters just before he drifts off to sleep.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 20

            Kendall and Giselle had remained close.  Throughout Nick's stay, Kendall had kept her distance, letting Giselle and Nick have their privacy. Once he was gone, she went over to Giselle's to try to cheer her up. She knew her friend was hurting and missing Nick.

            When they sit down to talk, Kendall says, "So, how did it go?"

            Giselle says, "It was good. We...we talked a lot.  And he asked me if I'd be his girlfriend."

            Kendall smiles and says, "I'm assuming you said yes?" When Giselle nods, she says, "Are you happy?"

            Giselle thinks about it and says, "Yeah, for the most part."

            Kendall says, "He'll be back. You know that."

            Giselle says, "I do, Ken. I just got used to having him here."

            Kendall says, "So, what does AJ think of you and Nick?"

            Giselle stands and walks away, hugging herself.  She says, "I don't really know. I haven't spoken to him in months, Ken."

            Kendall's mouth drops open and she gasps. She says, "Giselle...what...I mean...he hasn't called at all?"

            Giselle sadly shakes her head and says, "No. I called when I got the job but he never called back. I guess...I guess we grew apart when we grew up."

            Kendall goes over to her and hugs her, whispering, "Giselle...I thought for sure...he's always been devoted to you. I can't believe..."

            Giselle shakes her head and says, "Really, it's ok. I'll always love AJ. You and he will always be my very best friends."

            Her move to the West Coast takes well over a month. By the time Giselle gets settled into her new job and new apartment in California, she's utterly exhausted.  Between work, her class schedule and adjusting to a new place, sleep becomes sporadic at best. 

When she collapses at work from dizziness, she's whisked away to the hospital in an ambulance. As she's waiting on the doctor to come in and examine her, she closes her eyes, wondering if she's going to be able to keep her job. Collapsing at work after only 2 weeks there isn't going to look well on her job performance review.

After 2 hours worth of tests, the doctor comes back into the room with a somewhat distracted look on his face.  He says, "Giselle, we've figured out what's wrong."

She thinks it's not good. She whispers, "Oh God, what is it?"

He clears his throat and says, "Giselle...you're pregnant."

Shock radiates through her body. Baby. Nick's baby. She whispers, "Baby?"

He nods and says, "I want to run a few tests and do an ultrasound too. I take it this is unexpected?"

She nods and whispers, "I never dreamed...we used...protection."

He says, "Nothing is fool proof. For now, I want to get the ultrasound and determine how far along you are, ok?"

She nods, feeling faint.  She closes her eyes trying to imagine what life with a baby is going to be like. Holy cow she still has college to finish. Her job. She's pondering all the problems with the technician comes in and does the ultrasound.

After the doctor checks all the test results, he comes in again and says, "Giselle, it looks like you're around 8 or 9 weeks. Does that sound right?"

She thinks back..Nick had been with her about a week then. She nods and says, "Yeah it does."

He says, "You need to get set up with an OB-GYN.  I'll recommend a couple of good ones.  For now, try to rest as much as you can. You're a little anemic, but nothing that concerns me greatly, ok?"

She nods and thanks him.  When she gets outside, she runs her hand over her stomach and whispers, "Wow. A baby."

She waits 2 weeks to tell Nick. She doesn't want to drop this on him over the phone, but he's not scheduled to be back in the states for at least four months.  Pushing aside her daily bout of morning sickness, she calls. 

When he answers the phone, he sounds irritated.  She thinks he was sleeping and says, "I'm sorry if I woke you Nick."

She hears him grunt before saying, "S'ok. Hang on a second."

The phone goes completely silent for about 3 seconds.  Then she hears him whisper, "Fuck yes!"

With a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, she says, "Nick?" No answer.  A little louder, "NICK!"  Still nothing.

Then she hears her. "OH FUCK your dick is HUGE!"

She hangs up. Gently, she lays her phone on the table by her bed and stares off into space. He lied...he used her and lied.  She wants to feel anger at him but she's furious with herself for being such a fool.

She calls Kendall.  After asking about the weather back home three times, Kendall says, "Giselle, what's going on?"

Giselle says, "I...Nick...I called. He was...in bed with someone."

Kendall gasps and says, "He WHAT?"

Giselle says, "Ken...Ken I'm pregnant."

Sobs rack her body. She can barely breathe. Kendall yells, "Giselle, calm down. You gotta CALM DOWN girl."  When she finally stops sobbing, Kendall says, "What are you going to do?"

Shaking from head to toe, Giselle says, "I'm going to have a baby. Kendall, I'm so scared."

Kendall says, "Don't be. Giselle...I'll be here for you, you know that. Unless I go to jail for killing Nick Carter."

Giselle says, "Don't, Ken. I was afraid it was too good to be true. What's done is done. I just...I don't know if I can do this alone."

"Giselle...are you keeping the baby?"

            With shock evident in her voice, Giselle answers quickly and decisively.  "Yes."

            "Want me to come out there?"

Giselle knows if she says yes, Kendall's on the next plane, no questions asked. "More than anything. But...wait till break, ok?"

            Giselle hears papers rustling before Kendall says, "Spring break is in 4 weeks.  I'll be there with bells on, ok?"

            Biting her lip, Giselle closes her eyes. "What do I tell Nick?" she finally asks.

             "Tell him to fuck off." The venom in her friend's voice makes Giselle cringe.  "I mean, Giselle, he's a piece of shit for what he's doing to you."

            "But this is his baby," she cries. "He needs to know Ken."

            Resigned to the fact that she's right, Kendall offers to help. "I know. Want me to call him?"

Determined to end it on her terms not Kendall's OR Nick's, Giselle says, "No, I will. I just....I needed you to ground me."

            Aching for her friend, she begs, "Call me after you talk to him, ok?"

            Giselle sniffles and says, "I will.  Thanks Kendall. Love you."

            Sighing deeply, she whispers, "Love you too. I'm here for you."

            After an hour and a cup of tea, Giselle dials Nick's number again. He answers on the second ring, "Carter."

            Giselle says, "Hi."

            He clears his throat and says, "Umm, hey."

            Letting her anger take over, she says, "Did you finish with her?"

            He sighs and says, "I'm sorry Giselle."

            Pissed at herself for letting her heart beat quicken at his apology, she says, "I don't care Nick. I just don't give a flying fuck at the moment."

            On the defensive, he says, "I didn't meant to..."

            She snaps, "Shut up Nick. I just called to tell you...I'm pregnant."

            He stammers and groans in disbelief before saying, "Is it mine?"

            She hisses into the phone, "You're the only guy I've been with Nick. Who the fuck else COULD be the father?"

            Nick grumbles, "Don't get your panties twisted. We'll just...deal with it."

            In disbelief, she says, "Who says you get a vote? This is MY body and MY baby and I'll do what I think is best." She ends the call and throws the phone, dissolving into a fit of hysterics.  After she calms down, she sits down and thinks long and hard about the choices in front of her. What should she do?

            Fate made that decision for her.  Two weeks later, at her first appointment with her OB-GYN, she's ushered into an exam room and once again had blood work, a pelvic exam, and finally an ultrasound.  The technician doesn't say a word.  Giselle lies patiently waiting for the tech to make some kind of comment. Instead, she puts the wand back on the machine, wipes the gel from her stomach and goes out the door. 

            Five minutes later, the doctor comes in looking at her chart. She sits down and says, "Giselle...there's no easy way to say this."

            Giselle feel fear gnawing at her gut. She says, "What?  What is it?"

            The doctor says, "I'm sorry, Giselle, we can't...find a heartbeat."

            Giselle just stares at her.  Finally she looks down at her stomach and says, "The baby's gone?"

            The doctor nods and says, "I'm so sorry.  Sometimes...it happens. There's no reason why..."

            Giselle nods, feeling numb, and says, "What...now?"

            The doctor says, "I recommend and D & C.  You can, of course, just let it happen naturally, but...it's a pretty rough thing to go through unless someone is there with you."

            Giselle lays back and lets the tears fall. She whispers, "When?"

            The doctor says, "Naturally, it can happen any time. If you want me to take care of it, we can do it tomorrow.  It's...your decision." When she doesn't say anything, the doctor says, "Do you want to talk to the baby's father?"

            Sniffling, Giselle says, "No. He doesn't care. Just...just do it. Please. I can't...I don't have anyone here that can help me if..."

            The doctor cuts her off and says, "We'll do it tomorrow, Giselle. I'm really very sorry."

            Cupping her stomach with her hands, she whispers, "Me too."

            A week after the procedure, Giselle gets a phone call she doesn't expect.  AJ.  When she answers, he says, "Hey, Elle, what's shaking Baby?"

            He sounds so strange, she says, "AJ? Is that you?"

            Laughing, he says, "Of course it's me! Did you expect Nick?"

            She sighs and says, "No. Nick and I are through." She hears ice tinkling in a glass and says, "AJ are you drunk?"

            He chuckles and says, "Fucking A I am. Why, you wanna get drunk with me?"

            She says, "No. What do you want AJ?"

            He snorts and says, "Wanted to tell you those pics were HOT! I can't believe you let Nicky take pics like that. DAMN girl!"

            Confusion laces her voice. "Pictures? What pictures?"

            Another tinkle of ice against glass before he says, "You know the one's where he was fucking you doggy style. I think half the crew got off looking at your tits."

            She closes her eyes, tears seeping from the corners. "Why?  AJ, why? Why are you doing this to me?"

            He snorts and says, "I just called to say I told you so. I knew he was being a prick but you wouldn't listen."

            She sobs and says, "I can't believe...AJ what in the world are you trying to do to me?"

            He says, "Nothing. Not a damn thing. I just...FUCK, never mind."

            Whispering, "AJ...what?"

            Slamming down his glass, he says, "Congrats on the baby. Nick will be the best kind of Dad. Always gone."

            She whimpers and says, "No need to worry about that, AJ. I lost the baby." When he doesn't reply, she hangs up. Closing her eyes, she sits on her bed and puts her head on her knees sobbing. She lost her baby, she lost Nick, and now she's lost AJ. It's only a matter of time before she loses everything.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 21

            Kendall and Grant waited till they both were out of college and settled into their careers to get married.  So two weeks shy of her 28th birthday, Giselle finds herself on a plane to Florida. She long ago obtained her degree and is now working her way up through the ranks of a multi-billion dollar corporation. She thought she was pretty happy with all aspects of her life.  OK, most aspects. She very rarely dates. She can't get over Nick, even though she knows she should hate him. The Backstreet Boys are one of the biggest groups in the country and she can't help getting caught up in the hype.

            But she misses AJ. Even though her heart still yearns for Nick's love, she misses her best friend. He had tried calling a couple of times after she hung up on him. She ignored him. Eventually, she got an email apologizing for what he said and asking if she was ok. She wept when she read it but she didn't reply. That wasn't her AJ on the phone.

Denise had called her shortly after that and they talked a lot about AJ. Alcohol was ruling his life and he wasn't the boy she grew up with. Denise said she was afraid for his life and asked Giselle to talk to him. Giselle wanted to...she told Denise she'd try, but in the end, she couldn't make the call. She just sent him a text that simply said, "I love you, but you have to get help."

She never heard from him. She figured he was mad. She had almost made her peace with her past when she got the invitation to Grant and Kendall's wedding. Especially when Kendall showed up on her doorstep to personally deliver it.  That was really what made her decision for her. Her decision to start over.

Now she's on her way home. Almost there, and she's nervous. Will being back bring up memories that need to be left dead and buried? Or will Giselle finally move on?

Kendall and Grant are at the airport waiting for her.  After a tearful hello, they get her bags. Grant says, "Wow, Giselle, California agrees with you. You look amazing."

She smiles and says, "Still a flatterer I see. Save it for your bride, Mister!"

They all laugh before Kendall says, "You do look good Giselle. I LOVE your hair short!"

Running her fingers through her hair, Giselle says, "Me too. It's easier to deal with."

Grant says, "How's the job?"

Smiling, she says, "It's really good. Only...it's boring."

Kendall says, "Boring? How can it be boring, it's what you've always wanted to do?"

Shaking her head, Giselle says, "No, I've always wanted to manage my own store. Really be in charge. I'm nothing in this company. Just a name.  I don't feel like I make a difference."

Once in the car, Grant says, "So, what do you want to do?"

Giselle thinks long and hard before saying, "I want to come home."

Kendall turns in her seat, shocked at what she just heard. "Home? You want to come back here? Really?"

Until she said the words, Giselle didn't realize how much. "Yeah, I want to come home. California is nice, but it's not me. I belong here. I just have to find a job in the two weeks I'm here for your wedding."

Grant pulls into the driveway of their house and asks, "Why?"

As she follows them to the front door, she says, "I quit my job and gave up my apartment."

Both turn to her, shocked.  "YOU DID WHAT?" Kendall practically yells.

Grant looks around and says, "Pipe down, Kendall. Let's get inside and hear her out."

After settling down with a glass of wine, Kendall waits patiently. Giselle sighs and says, "I hate it Ken. I don't want to work in a place like that and I don't want to be away from you. Now that you're FINALLY getting married, I want to be here. I want to be here when you have your first child and I want to be close to my best friend."

At the mention of a baby, Kendall's eyes reflect the sadness Giselle is feeling. Grant sees the female moment coming and excuses himself, but not before saying, "You can stay with us, Giselle, until you find a job."

She gives him a grateful smile and says, "I'm not going to impose. I'm going to stay with Hoke and Paula while I job hunt."

Kendall says, "You're staying with me until the wedding. I need my maid of honor here."

They all laugh, the moment broken up by Grant's cell phone. After checking the message, he says, "Gotta go to the hospital, hon. You girls have fun."

After he leaves, Giselle says, "He was born to be a doctor."

Kendall says, "I know. He's very happy he went into sports medicine. Frankly, so am I."

Keeping the topic off her for a few minutes, Giselle says, "What about you? How do you like working at KFLA?"

Kendall beams and says, "I love it, Giselle. It's what I've always dreamed. I wanted to wait till you were here to tell you...I'm finally producing! I got the midday show!"

Giselle leaps to her feet and tackles Kendall. They fall over on the couch hugging and for the first time in years, Giselle feels like she's home. The emotions overwhelm her and she starts sobbing.

Sensing her friend's impending meltdown, Kendall hugs her and lets her cry it out. When the sobs subside, she says, "Talk to me Giselle. Don't keep it bottled up any more."

Curling her legs up under her and hugging a pillow, Giselle says, "I'm so lonely Ken. I miss Nick."

Kendall's mouth drops and says, "You miss HIM or you miss being with someone? Cause there's a big fucking difference!"

Giselle closes her eyes. Time to be perfectly honest with herself and Kendall. "I miss being held, Ken. He was the only guy I was ever with and he made me feel things I never knew I could feel. I want that. I ache for it."

Kendall says, "That's not missing Nick, Giselle. What you need is a good man."

Trying to bring levity to the situation, Giselle says, "So you'll share Grant with me?"

Kendall smacks her arm and says, "Not on your life." When the laughter subsides, Kendall says, "Giselle, AJ and Nick will be at the wedding." Giselle stares at her in horror so she rushes on. "I had to invite them, Giselle. The entire group.  It wasn't...I knew if I told you about it you wouldn't come home."

She thinks about it before saying, "Yes I would Ken. You were there for me when I needed you. Every single time. Now it's my turn. I can handle seeing Nick and...and AJ."

Kendall looks out the window when car lights pass over it. "I hope so because, well..."

Seeing her start to squirm, Giselle knows she's going to regret asking. "What?"

The door behind her opens and AJ walks in with Grant. "Hey Elle."

Giselle closes her eyes. It's gotta be a dream. She opens them and turns, seeing AJ.  He looks thin and pale. She stares at him, not really sure what he expects her to say.

Kendall and Grant disappear as AJ walks over to stand beside her. He takes off his glasses and says, "You look good, Elle."

She bites her lip, trying not to cry. He sees her body shake and he draws her against his chest. "I'm so sorry Elle. I'm so sorry for everything. Please say you don't hate me."

His whispered plea knocks down the rest of the wall surrounding her heart. She clutches his shirt as the sobs take over her body. He whispers, "It's ok, Elle. Shh, it's ok."

How long she cried, she doesn't know. They end up sitting on the couch, him practically holding her on his lap. When she's brave enough to look into his eyes, he wipes the tears from her face and says, "I don't deserve your friendship. Not after the way I treated you."

She struggles to hold the tears at bay and says, "AJ, are you ok? Really?"

She sees he's having a hard time finding the right words. Finally, he says, "We're not talking about me yet, Elle. I need to talk about you ok?" When she nods, he says, "Nick...Elle, I'm so very sorry he hurt you."

She snuggles against his chest, hiding her face in his neck.  As she traces the tattoos on the parts of his chest showing, she says, "Is he ok?"

His body tenses up. He says, "I think he's pretty fucked up right now, Elle. You won't recognize him.  He's changed."

She nods and says, "I've followed your career. I know how he's changed. And you. You seem lost, AJ. Please talk to me."

He chuckles and says, "Not yet. I have one more thing to ask you." When she looks into his eyes, he says, "Are you really ok?" At her puzzled expression, he says, "Losing the baby...how hard was it on you? I should have been there. Hell, NICK should have been there."

She sniffles again and snuggles against him, her tears soaking into his shirt. "I didn't think I could get over AJ. I still don't know if I have. My baby would have been in school now...some days I think it was God's way of telling me I wasn't ready and other day's I just curse Him for not letting me have someone in my life that would always be there."

He stiffens and she knows she's hurt his feelings. She pulls back to look at him, seeing tears falling down his face. "I'm sorry Elle. I should have been. I shouldn't have let you go through that alone. I wanted to fucking kill Nick and I still do some days."

Snuggling with him, she whispers, "Don't, AJ. It doesn't take a genius to figure out he's in trouble." Stroking his arm, she says, "I think you are too. What's going on?"

He stiffens and she's thankful she's sitting on him. He can't get away. He can't avoid her. Finally, he says, "I'm outta control Elle. I don't know how to stop."

Pulling back to look at him, she says, "Let me help you AJ. Please. I...need you AJ. I missed you. I can't do this...I can't live without you in my life. It's too hard. Please, AJ...please don't leave me again."

He sees the fear in her eyes. The fear of being alone. A fear he's felt for a long time now. "I don't know how, Elle. I don't know where to begin."

She kisses his cheek and says, "You just did. Let's talk to Grant. He can help us find a way."

"Us?" That single word throws him for a loop.

She smiles timidly. "I'm not letting you go through this alone AJ. I'm gonna be here to help you."

He hugs her tightly and says, "I don't deserve it. But God knows I need you Elle. I need you like I've never needed anyone before."

With her head on his shoulder, she whispers, "I've always been here AJ. And I always will."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 22

            After talking to Grant, he agrees to help AJ get into a facility after the wedding. Until then, he's staying at their place too, so they can keep an eye on him.  Twelve hours after he showed up, he's visibly going through withdrawl. Grant calls and has the hospital open a room for him to detox.

            Giselle goes with him to the hospital. She knows he's scared. They won't let her go in with him, but they give them privacy to talk before he goes in. She holds his hands and says, "AJ, remember, I'm always here for you. OK?"

            Even though he's shaking, he nods and says, "Elle, I love you. And when I get through this, I'm going to make up for not being there."

            She smiles and hugs him, kissing his cheek. She whispers, "Do what they say AJ. I need my date for the wedding."

            He kisses her cheek and says, "First dance is mine." Before she can walk away, he says, "Elle...Don't...be careful around Nick, ok?" She nods, blowing him a kiss before walking out.

            AJ spends almost 2 weeks at the hospital. Even though the detox really was only supposed to last 3 days.  He shows up at Grant and Kendall's the night before the wedding and it's easy to see he's uncomfortable in his own skin.   He has dinner with them, but barely eats.  After the dishes are done, Grant packs a small bag to stay overnight with his brother.  Kendall's going all out on the groom not seeing the bride before the wedding.

            After he's gone, she hugs AJ and Giselle both, thanking them for being there for her then she goes to bed. Giselle watches AJ. She can tell he's still not himself. She says, "What do you want to do?"

            He says, "Find a bottle."

            She says, "Since that's not happening, what ELSE do you want to do?"

            He chuckles and says, "I'm really tired. But when I sleep I dream."

            She scoots closer to him on the couch and says, "Want me to stay with you? Keep the dreams away?"

            He chuckles and says, "Giselle, women ask to sleep with me every day, but not to keep away bad dreams."

            She blushes and says, "I'm not a groupie McLean."

            He hugs her and says, "Hell no you're not."  Before she can make a comment, his phone rings. When he looks at it, he frowns before answering with a somewhat subdued, "Yeah?"

            After a few some tense seconds, he says, "No, you have to stay at a hotel. You can't stay here."  Then it dawns her.  It's Nick. Even though it's been years, she has to struggle to keep her bruised heart in check. She listens as he says, "No, Nick, I'm done.  I'm not touring again till I straighten myself out. Maybe you should..." A lengthy pause. "No, dammit Nick, this isn't about you, you sick fuck. YES I still want to kick your ass and when I get over this, I damn sure might!" He hangs up and tosses his phone aside. Looking at Giselle, he says, "Sorry about that."

            She shakes her head.  "What's wrong?"

            Snorting, he says, "Same as always. Nick wants someone to hold his hand and kiss away his boo boos. Time he wakes up and realizes he's got to fix himself."

            She just nods.  They sit quietly a few minutes before he asks, "You gonna be ok around him?"

            She shrugs. "I want to say I will, AJ.  But I don't know. I...he meant a lot to me and I never had a chance to...process what happened."

            He hugs her close.  "I'm sorry Elle. What can I do?"

            Snuggling on his chest, she whipsers, "Don't leave me again."

            He kisses the side of her head. "I'm sorry Giselle."

            The next morning dawns overcast and gloomy.  Kendall is thoroughly depressed about the weather, but Giselle and AJ won't let her stay gloomy.  They play music loudly as they make breakfast together. 

Just as they sit down to eat, the doorbell rings. Kendall runs to get it, her squeals of delight ringing throughout the neighborhood when Meagan and Brian step through the door.  As Giselle runs in to greet them, Brian spies AJ. He walks over to him and says, "Dude, are you ok?"

AJ shrugs as Meagan comes over to hug him too. He smiles and says, "It's not been THAT long since you saw me Meg."

She shrugs and says, "ARE you ok, AJ? You look pale."

Kendall says, "Come on, join us for breakfast and we'll talk. I made a spinach quiche."

And talk they did. AJ never realized how much he could depend on his friends to help and not judge him. Brian offered to take AJ to his hotel while the girls did the whole pre-wedding thing, mani's, pedi's, hair, and make up.

After arranging to meet at the church, the boys leave and the girls settle down for a little girl chat before the nail tech arrives. Meagan starts it off by saying, "OK, I know what you've been up to Ken, what about you Giselle? You won't talk to me on the phone much."

Giselle blushes.  "I'm sorry Meg.  I lead a boring life. It's much more fun to hear about you and your adventures with Brian."

She blushes and says, "Well, if you're available in a few months, there's another wedding for you two to stand up in."

When she flashes the diamond, they all scream. Giselle joins the group hug, even though she's feeling down. She's thrilled for her friends, but deep down, they have what she wants most. True love.

Once they calm down again and Giselle and Kendall finishing oohing and ahhing over her HUGE ring, Meagan says, "Seriously, Giselle...are you ok? Umm, Nick told us...about the baby. I wanted to come but you kept telling me to stay away."

Giselle curls her legs up under her body and says, "I wasn't really up for company, Meg. It wasn't you. What I needed most was Nick to grieve with me, but he didn't care.  It took a long time for me to admit to myself he never did."

Meagan says, "Maybe I shouldn't tell you this, but I think you need to know...he was upset too, Giselle. He...confided in Brian a few times that he fucked up big time and you wouldn't let him fix it."

Giselle's mouth drops open. "He never called, Meagan. He had my number and he knew where I lived...if he missed me so much, if he was so upset, why didn't he call?"

Meagan says, "But I thought...he said...oh that lying piece of SHIT!"

Giselle and Kendall stare at her, amazed by her outburst. Then Giselle starts laughing.  She laughs so hard, she has tears in her eyes. The other girls watch her in shock, before their laughter joins hers.

When she catches her breath, Meagan says, "Giselle...I really thought he cared. I'm sorry."

Giselle shrugs and says, "He's shown his true colors, Meg. He made his choice."

Kendall says, "But you still care about him, don't you Giselle?"

She nods faintly. "He was my first. First love, first lover, first heartbreak. Hard to get over that."

Kendall says, "He was also the father of the baby you lost."

At the mention of her baby, Giselle's lip starts to quiver. The girls move in closer, barely hearing her whisper, "It hurts so much!"

Just as she collapses, sobbing, the hair dresser and nail tech shows up. Kendall shows them where to set up while Meagan lets Giselle cry it out.  When she's all dried up, Giselle whispers, "I'm sorry."

Meagan says, "Why? Giselle, you're supposed to be sad about the baby. And about Nick. The only way to get over it is to experience the grief and you always push it away.  You've been that way your whole life, Giselle. All you gotta do is let it go. Then the hurt will fade...you'll always miss what you never had.  Then someday, when you least expect it, the time will be right and God will give you your baby.  He or she is just waiting until you find the RIGHT daddy."

As they sit through having their nails done, their hair styled, and their makeup applied, Giselle thinks about what Meagan said.  And she's right. She always bottles her emotions...keeping them in check. She's never really grieved and until she does, she'll never move on.

After the techs leave, Giselle and Meagan help Kendall into her dress before donning their own. When Kendall is dressed, Giselle stares at her in awe. Kendall's always been pretty, but in her wedding dress, she's truly a princess. After gushing over how gorgeous she is, Giselle and Meagan get dressed.

While Kendall always said she wanted a fairy tale wedding, she opted for a simple, clinging white wedding gown with rhinestones glittering on the bodice.  Megan and Giselle had simple, yet elegant dresses; dark vivid purple silk, with a scoop neck and backless.  Since the wedding is set for early evening, the dresses are long.  Giselle doesn't recognize herself when she's dressed.  When she walks, her leg pushes through the thigh high slit, making her feel sexy. A feeling she's never really had before.

After sliding on her four inch silver heels that match the sliver beading around the waist of her dress, she goes to check on Kendall. When Kendall sees Giselle, her mouth drops open. Meagan is waiting with Kendall and has the same reaction. Giselle starts to feel self-conscious and says, "What?"

Kendall finally finds her voice and says, "Giselle...I've never...you look...WOW!"

Meagan says, "I agree, Giselle. You look amazing."

Blushing, she brushes away the compliments and says, "Stop it, it's just me. This is Kendall's day. No one's gonna be looking at me."

            Oh how wrong she is.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 23

            AJ sent a limo to bring the girls to the church. They giggle like school girls all the way there.  When the limo stops in front of the church, they have to wait because not everyone has gone in yet. 

Giselle looks around the crowd. She sees Nick and can't stop the gasp that escapes her lips. Kendall says, "What? What is it?"

Meagan says, "I guess I should have warned you, Giselle."

Giselle shakes her head. "I knew he'd be here Meg. I just...he doesn't look well at all. AJ tried to warn me, but...wow."

Nick had gained fifty pounds easy. But he didn't look overweight so much as bloated.  Kendall says, "Holy shit, what's he doing to himself?"

Meagan says, "Drinking, partying, God knows what kind of drugs."

Giselle frowns. "He needs help as bad as AJ."

Meagan says, "AJ wouldn't talk to me on the road, Giselle. I tried. He kept me at arm's length. When we did talk, all he'd say was how sorry he was that he let us down. All three of us."

Giselle sighs deeply. "He said the same thing to me. He wants to get help now."

Meagan nods.  "I know. Brian told me. I hope it works cause the group is about to implode. Kevin's leaving hit them hard."

Giselle didn't know about Kevin, but before she could reply, the door opens and Kendall's dad sticks his head in and says, "Ready for this?"

Pushing aside all thoughts of Nick, AJ and the group, Giselle grabs Kendall's hand and says, "I'm so happy for you," before jumping from the car. Megan gives her a squeeze too before following. When Kendall gets out of the car, Giselle feels overwhelming happiness for her best friend. She watches Meagan and thinks about what a beautiful bride she too will be someday.

As maid of honor, Giselle gets to walk down the aisle alone.  She'd much rather have someone to hold on to. Three steps into the church and her eyes find Nick. He's watching her intently. An almost desolate look on his face. 

She skims the crowd, finding Brian staring at Meagan with love in his eyes. She finds Howie next, with Paula and Hoke beside him. They all smile and wave. She feels an overwhelming love for the family that helped her greatly in her time of need.  Behind them, she sees Kevin. Even though he smiles her way, she can see anger in his eyes. His anger seems to be directed at Nick and AJ. 

Speaking of AJ, when she sees him, he looks...stunned. He's staring at her like he's never seen her before.  She smiles timidly and he smiles back. She knows he's worried about rehab, but she also feels he really wants it to work.

When she makes it to the altar, she's startled to find Grant's brother, and best man, Chris, staring at her. He gives her the kind of smile that makes women blush to their toes. And blush she does.  She turns to watch Kendall walk down the aisle on her father's arm. Tears sting her eyes when he places Kendall's hand in Grant's, giving his daughter away to the man who will take care of her from now on.

Giselle has no doubt that Grant and Kendall are soul mates. Anyone can see it.  When the minister announces they are man and wife, Giselle is overwhelmed by a feeling of sadness.  Sadness that she can't find love like this. The one thing she's always wanted is someone to love her unconditionally. That hasn't happened yet. And at the rate it's going, it never will.

Giselle and Meagan ride in a limo with the rest of the wedding party to the banquet hall for the reception. Chris sits close to Giselle, making her feel like a giddy school girl. He plies her with compliments, touching her every chance he gets.  Even though the attention makes her feel good about herself, it also makes her uncomfortable. She keeps sliding away and his body keeps following her. By the time they make it to the banquet hall, he has her backed into a corner and she can't move. 

Everyone else gets out of the car and heads inside. Meagan latches onto Brian and walks in with him, assuming Giselle is right behind them.  She starts to move past Chris to get out and he pulls the door shut. "Hang on Giselle. Let's talk a minute."

She says, "Chris, we should go in. They will be waiting for us."

He laughs. "They aren't waiting for us. They are waiting for the bride and groom. Let's talk."

Forcing herself to show bravado she's not feeling, she says, "About what?"

He smirks, causing her skin to crawl. "Let's talk about how hot you look. And how nice it would be if we had some quality time. Alone."

She blushes, trying to find a way out of this. "Chris, that's flattering. But we really should get inside. You have to make the first toast."

He grabs her and says, "In a minute.  Let's talk."

She pulls away and says, "NO! Don't touch me!"

He snorts. "You frigid little prude. I thought weddings made women horny."

He pushes away and slides out of the car, not even waiting to help her. Sighing deeply, she slips out, dreading the night ahead of her. What she doesn't expect is Nick to be standing there waiting for her.

When her eyes meet his, her knees almost buckle under her.  He grabs her elbow and says, "You ok, G?"

She pulls away. "Fine Nick. Just lost my balance. How...are you?"

He seems...lost. "I'm ok, I guess. Work's been...bad lately. Kevin...quit."

She nods. "I heard. What happened?"

He looks around.  "Can we talk? Later? I need to...I don't know."

She looks up to find AJ watching her intently. Turning back to Nick she says, "I don't know if I can Nick."

He nods. "If we don't...G, I'm really sorry. About everything. I was...stupid."

Without blinking an eye she says, "Yes, you were. Get some help Nick. You're gonna kill yourself and I don't think I can live if you're dead."

She walks away, leaving Nick stunned. When she steps up beside AJ, he asks, "You ok, Elle?"

She nods. "Do I still get the first dance with you?"

He looks puzzled. "Thought you had the first one with the best man." When she grimaces, he asks, "What happened?"

Shaking her head, she says, "Nothing.  I'd just rather dance with my best friend."

He smiles and puts his arm around her waist. As they walk into the banquet hall, he says, "Then I'll have the prettiest girl here dancing with me." She blushes and lowers her head. He sees and says, "Come on, look at you...you're absolutely gorgeous, Elle. Guys are gonna notice and flirt."

She stops and turns to face him, her voice raspy with unshed tears. "I don't want guys to stop and flirt, AJ.  All Nick did was flirt and look what it got me. I don't...I don't want or need a man in my life. I'm tired of getting my heart broken."

Her outburst shocks him. He grabs her arms and pulls her closer. He hugs her and whispers against her hair. "Don't cry, Elle. We're not worth it. Guys aren't worth it.  NICK is not worth it. Baby, I'm so sorry you've been hurt. If there's one person in this world that deserves a happily ever after it's you."

She steps back, swiping her hand across her face. "I don't want a happily ever after AJ. I don't know what I want anymore."

He says, "Don't give up on love, Elle. Don't ever give up on love."

The rest of the reception is a blur. The only man Giselle danced with was AJ.  She spent a lot of time with Paula and Hoke, finding out from them that Howie is engaged.  She met his fiancée Ana, and really liked her a lot.

At the end of the reception, after the bride and groom leave for their honeymoon, Giselle and AJ climb back into the limo to go back to Kendall and Grant's place. When they get there, both are shocked to find Nick standing on the porch, waiting. AJ swears under his breath. Giselle squeezes his hand and says, "It's ok. Let's just hear him out."

As they climb out of the car, AJ mutters, "If he hurts you again, I'll kill him."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 24

            AJ and Nick stare at each other while Giselle unlocks the door. When they are all inside, Nick says, "Umm, Giselle...can we talk?"

            AJ steps closer to Nick. "I think you need to leave, Nick. You've done enough."

            Nick glare is deadly. With a calm voice, he says, "I wasn't asking you...I was asking Giselle."

            AJ meets his stare with a furious one of his own. "I won't let you hurt her again, Nick. She's been through enough."

            Giselle steps up to them and puts her hand on AJ's arm. "Hey, don't do this. I can...I'll talk to him, AJ. Please...just give us a few minutes."

            AJ pulls his gaze from Nick and looks at Giselle. He kisses her forehead and whispers, "Yell if you need me."

            After he disappears to his room, Nick and Giselle stare at each other.  Finally, she sits on one end of the couch and says, "What did you want to talk about Nick?"

            He licks his lips and sits down. "I'm sorry G. About everything. I was stupid and...I'm sorry."

            She shakes her head, not meeting his gaze. "Nick, it's over. I don't want to rehash it, ok?"

            He timidly reaches over and touches her hand. She stiffens and he pulls away. "G, I mean it.  I really am sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone when..."

            When he hesitates, she snaps. "When what, Nick? When I found out I was pregnant? When I found out I lost my baby? You were too busy fucking your groupies to give a damn about what I was going through! Did you even care? Did it BOTHER you to know that the life you and I created didn't make it?"

            By now, the tears are flowing freely and she's trembling in rage. AJ comes running down the stairs. "What the fuck is going on? Nick, what did you say?"

            She jumps up and slams her hands on AJ's chest. "NO! This doesn't concern you right now. This is between us. GO!" He stares down at her, stunned. He grabs her face and brushes her tears away. She sighs and whispers, "Please AJ? I'm ok."

            He nods, throwing a glare at Nick. "I'll be in my room."

            After he leaves, she turns to Nick. "What was I to you, Nick?"

            He drops his gaze. "I don't know. I did...do...care about you G. I just felt like it was too serious between us."

            She sniffles. "You knew I loved you. You used me to get yourself off.  I was just another fuck, huh?"

            He grimaces. "No, G, you weren't. I told you, I was stupid. I'm sorry, dammit!"

            She turns and whispers, "Nick, you need to go. I...accept your apology."

            He takes a chance and steps up behind her, putting his hands on her shoulders. "Please, look at me, G." When she turns, he says, "I was never good enough for you, was I?"

            She steps back and says, "No, Nick. I'm not the person you need. I see that now."

            His eyes flick away; then back. "Giselle, I've always needed you. Even now. I see what a fool I was, but it's too late, isn't it? I ran out of chances."

            She trembles. "Please, don't do this Nick.  I can't...I can't take it."

            He cups her face in his hands and slowly lowers his head to hers. When their lips touch, he swallows her sob and crushes her to his body. She holds on to him tightly, aching to have him fill her again, like he did so long ago.

            When their lips part, he presses his forehead to hers. "What can I do? How can I prove to you I mean it?"

            She wants to take him to her room. Have him make love to her all night. But she sees a light in his eyes that scares her. A hunger that isn't for her. She pushes away gently and says, "I want you to get help Nick. Serious help. I'm afraid for you. I lost you once. I lost our baby. I lost AJ. I can't lose anyone else. Please."

            His eyes burn into hers. "You sound like all the guys. I don't need ‘help' G. I can stop it all...for you...all you have to do is tell me. No more drinking. No partying."

            She knows he's scared. She keeps pushing anyway. "What about the drugs, Nick? Can you stop those too? Look at yourself. Nick, I'm so afraid. You're killing yourself. Please...talk to someone. Get into a program. PLEASE!"

            He pushes her away. "I don't have a problem, G."

            She sniffles and says, "You do, Nick. You're sick and you need help."

            He stomps to the door.  He turns back to her and says, "I may be sick...because I still want you.  Still love you.  And that doesn't mean shit to you, does it?"

            Before she can answer, he storms out, slamming the door. She drops down onto the couch, sobbing.  AJ comes into the room some time later, finding her curled up in a ball, crying her eyes out. He scoops her into his arms and carries her to her bed.

            He sits her on the edge and kneels down, slipping off her shoes.  She lies down and rolls on her side, still sobbing. He lies down with her and pulls her close. She snuggles on his chest and hears him say, "I'm sorry Elle."

            Two months later, Giselle is settled into her own place. A nice cottage on Paula and Hoke's property that they insist she uses. She wants to pay rent, but they won't allow it. So she adamantly refuses to stay if they don't at least let her pay her own utilities.  They reluctantly agree.

            She's sitting at her dining room table in a long t-shirt, sipping a cup of coffee and reading the paper. She had found a job as assistant manager of an upscale boutique. She's not scheduled to work this particular Sunday, which she hates. When she has days off during the week, she can always find things to do to keep herself busy. But weekends are hard. She just sits home alone, depressed.

            Hearing someone knock on her door startles her. Figuring it's Paula wanting her to join them for lunch, she doesn't bother getting a robe. Imagine her shock to open the door and find AJ standing there. Not thinking about what she's wearing, she leaps into his arms, squealing.

            He chuckles, hugging her tightly, lifting her off the ground. When he puts her down, she pulls back and says, "You look so GOOD!"

            He looks down her body then back to her face and says, "So do you, Elle."

            She blushes to the roots of her hair and says, "Come in, I'll go get dressed."

            He laughs and says, "Don't, please. I haven't seen a beautiful, half dressed woman in months. Let me drool."

            She sticks her tongue out and says, "Coffee's in the kitchen. I'll be right back."

            When she comes back in shorts and a tank top, AJ says, "Girl, you look awesome. What's his name?"

            She sits down and says, "There is no he. I have a great job, a great place to live.  I'm...happy."

            He looks at her quizzically. "Happy, huh? Why do I think you're lying?"

            She sighs. "AJ, I'm not seeing anyone. I really am happy...but days like today...I just get lonely. That's all." Shaking her head, she says, "Let's talk about you. How do you feel?"

            He knows he won't get an answer now, so he answers her questions. "I'm ok, I think. It's been 74 days since I had a drink."

            She grabs his hand and says, "I'm SO proud of you, AJ!" He looks down and blushes. She knows there's more. "What? What are you hiding?"

            He chuckles. "I never could hide things from you, could I?"

            She shakes her head. "Nope. That's why you ignored me for so long. You knew I'd see through the bullshit."

            Nodding, he says, "You're right. I was ashamed of what I was doing. I was really messed up Elle."

            Grinning, she asks, "So, what else is there?"

            The smile on his face lights up the room. "I'm dating someone.  It's kind of new but she blew me away."

            Giselle rubs his arm and says, "Who? Where did you meet her?"

            He says, "She was a nurse at my rehab. God, how I hated her at first.  Like Attila the Hun. Then, I don't know, one day, I just...had a meltdown. She was there and helped me through it."

            She scoots her chair closer to him. "Meltdown? About what?"

            He stares at the table. "Mainly my dad leaving. But my mom, you...all the people I disappointed. Even Nick and his shit."

            He lifts his gaze to hers and sees her crying. She whispers, "I was never disappointed in you AJ. Just worried."

            He wipes her tears and says, "I know. I'm sorry." Taking a deep breath, he says, "Nick's in rehab now."

            The shock on her face is unmistakable. "What? When?"

            He shakes his head. "A couple of weeks ago."

            She lowers her gaze. "I'm glad."

            AJ sighs. "Me too. You ok?"

            Nodding, she says, "Yeah. I just...For so long I thought he was the one, you know? Then, I figured out he wasn't.  Just when I think I can move on, another curve ball with his name on it."

            AJ chuckles. "Listen, I'm glad he's getting help...and I'm all for second chances. You gave me one. Mom did, the guys did. Hell, even Brooke. She is willing to overlook my past and give me a chance."

            Giselle smiles. "I think I like Brooke already."

            He smiles back. "Good. Cause I need a favor."

            She turns to him and smiles. "Anything."

            He leans closer and kisses her cheek. "Can we crash here till I find a place for us? If things go well with Nick in rehab, we're gonna...we're gonna try to record again."

            She smiles so big her cheeks hurt. Throwing her arms around his neck, she says, "YES, you can stay here. I'm so glad to have you back, AJ!"

            He hugs her, letting his head rest on her shoulder. "Me too, Elle. I never knew how much I needed you till you weren't there."

            She sniffles, pulling away. "I was always there, AJ. Even when you didn't want me to be."

            He smiles. "I was an idiot. I'm glad we're back, Elle. You're my best friend and I won't take you for granted again."

            She laughs. "I won't let you. Now, when do I get to meet Brooke?"

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 25

            Brooke and Giselle hit it off instantly. She and AJ stayed with her for two weeks.  Giselle was sad when they moved to their own place, but she was sure AJ had someone who would take care of him and help him through the dark times.

            Having AJ back in her life lifted her spirits. She saw him at least twice a week; spoke to him or Brooke on the phone daily. She knew Nick was out of rehab and apparently doing well.  He had some kind of interview on a talk show that she skipped watching.  Memories of Nick still make her sad, but she's moved on.

            When she finds out they are all back in town to record, all but Kevin, she becomes apprehensive.  Will Nick show up? How will she handle it? Their relationship was toxic from the word go, but she can't deny the attraction between them. Or the love she felt for him. Trying to dispel all those feelings before seeing him, she finally accepts a date with Mark.

            Mark is the manager at a store two doors down from where she works.  When he picks her up, he immediately puts her at ease.  Dinner with him was surprisingly fun, and when it came to the good night kiss, she was eager to grant his request.

            Once alone, she thought about it. Mark, their date, and his kiss.  While she had fun...she was strangely unaffected by his romantic overtures. Has it been so long she just doesn't feel it anymore? Doesn't need the touch of a man. His arms to hold her? His hands to caress her?

            She gets ready for bed.  With her legs curled up under her, she opens a book to read.  Barely three pages in, she tosses it aside and gets up to pace. Why is she so restless? So frustrated?  The answer shocks her...more than that it scares her.  Nick is in town...supposedly clean and sober. She misses him.

            She punches her pillow and turns off the light.  "NO!" she yells into the darkness.  Curling up, she whispers, "I can't go there again. Nick and I are through."  Even as she closes her eyes, she knows it's a lie. She's never gotten over Nick. Why think it will happen now?

Mark keeps asking her out.  She's running out of excuses to say no. Finally, she's having lunch with him as they both take breaks from work and she says, "Mark, I really like you, but I'm not sure dating is right for us. Not now anyway."

            He looks dumbfounded. "What? I thought...well, I assumed you had as much fun as me before."

            She sighs deeply. "I did. It was fun.  I just think it's not the right time. I'm really sorry."

            He mutters something unintelligible.  "I have to go back to work."

            She watches him leave, feeling desolate.  He could have been the one...but she knows he's not. He's just another guy.  Who will it take to make her forget Nick?

            As time goes by, she becomes more content with her life.  She switched jobs only because the boutique closed. Now she's working her way up to management in a locally owned clothing store catering to the teenage crowd. Even though she didn't start in management, the job is good.  It's always busy and she regularly works overtime. She doesn't think it will be long before she's tapped for her managerial skills.

As for her love life, there's no change there.  Yes, she'd like to fall in love, but if she doesn't, she's ok.  She's finally come to accept that sometimes life gives you what you need...even if it's not what you want.

            Over the next couple of years, she does in fact go into management in the store and her friendship with AJ, Kendall and Meagan stays as strong as ever.  She's still kind of irked Meagan and Brian ran off to Vegas to get married...but when their baby comes along, scarcely eight and a half months later, she understands.

            Kendall and Grant tried to have kids, but it never happened.  They are now looking at in vitro fertilization. Giselle feels so bad for them. She understands the pain of not having a child better than most.

            As her thirty-second birthday approaches, she falls into a funk. She wanted to be married with kids by thirty. As she's mulling over how to escape from her friends and their plans for her birthday, she gets a call.  Nick.

            When she answers, he says, "Hey, G, how you doing?"

            She can't help but smile.  "I'm good Nick.  How are you?"

            Silence meets her question.  Then a quiet, "Not so great. I...can we talk?"

            Not sure where he's going, she says, "Umm, yeah, I guess. What's going on?"

            He snorts.  "Not on the phone please. Can I take you out for dinner? I'll be on my best behavior, I promise."

            She thinks about it before answering. "Nick, I don't know if it's a good idea."

            He sighs. "Please. Just dinner? We'll be in public, I won't even touch you. I promise."

            She can't figure out why hearing him say he won't touch her makes her heart ache.  "OK. I'll meet you at Giovanni's at 7."

            Hesitantly, he asks, "Want me to pick you up?"

            As if he can see her, she shakes her head.  "NO! I mean...I think it's better if we meet. OK?"

            Sighing, he says, "Do I have to say I'm sorry again?"

            Tears pool on her lashes.  "No, Nick, it's over. I'll see you tonight." She hangs up quickly, wondering what she's getting herself into now.

            When she arrives at Giovanni's she's early. They seat her immediately, offering her a drink. She orders a white wine, then contemplates that move, considering Nick's battle with alcohol. She abstains around AJ...should she for Nick?

            By the time she's decided to change her order, he's coming in the door. Her stomach does somersaults. He's changed SO much since she saw him last. He's lost a lot of weight. He's lean, toned, and in a word...breathtaking. She takes a gulp of her wine, once again wishing she had someone in her life. Someone to keep her focus on so she won't lose her head. Nick's the only man she's ever loved. The only man that's ever touched her. Try as she might, she can't dispel the thoughts of how it felt when he held her gently and whispered words of love in her ear. Even though it was lies, she still aches to hear them once again.

            He smiles as he walks up to the table, leaning down to give her a lingering kiss on her cheek. So much for not touching. Once he's seated, he says, "You look beautiful, G."

            She smiles, trying to tame the swarm of butterflies in her gut. "Thanks Nick. You look...incredible."

            He blushes, lowering his head. "Feels good to be in shape. Had to you know? Couldn't keep going the way I was going. It was going to kill me." She looks puzzled by his comment. "You know the deal with my heart? Thank God it seems to be better now, but I'm not taking any more chances."

            She shakes her head, shaken. "I...didn't know you had a problem with your heart, Nick. What...was it?"

            He seems shocked. "AJ didn't...no, I guess he wouldn't have told you anything about me." Running a hand through his hair, he says, "A while back the doctor's found something wrong with my heart. It was...kind of scary, to put it mildly. They told me if I keep going the way I'm going, I'm gonna end up dead. So...I decided to listen. Lost some weight, stopped drinking, stopped partying...you know, all of it. I feel great now. Last time I was checked, there was no sign of any problems."

            She bites her lip, fighting the urge to cry. Finally, she says, "I'm so glad you're ok, Nick."

            He smiles. The waiter comes up and offers him a drink. He just says he'll stick with water. He offers a refill to Giselle. She declines, saying, "Water for me too." At Nick's questioning glance, she says, "I have to drive home." He nods, accepting her reason.

            After placing their order, he asks about her. How she's been, where she's working.  When the plates arrive and small talk is finished, she watches him.  He is SO different. SO grown up and, in all honesty, he seems to be everything she wanted him to be twelve years ago.  Until he says, "G, the reason I needed to see you. I need your help."

            Cautiously, she places her fork on her plate.  "Help with what, Nick?"

            He sighs. "My girlfriend, Sandy. She's...she thinks I'm still hung up...on you."

            OK, she didn't expect that one. Without thinking, she says, "You were never hung up on me at all, Nick."

            He pushes his plate back. "I was G. Boy was I. You were the ideal woman, and I wasn't lying when I said I loved you. I just...I couldn't give up everything else and be what you deserved."

            That confession hits her hard. Instead of dwelling on it, she says, "So, why do you need my help?"

            He says, "Is there...would you talk to Sandy?  Tell her we've been over for a long time and that there's nothing like that between us? I was going to propose, but she keeps throwing this up at me.  I can't get her to let it go."

            Anger boils under the surface. She's ready to explode. Calmly, she says, "You want me to talk to your current girlfriend and tell her I don't love you anymore so you can go down on one knee and propose."

He visibly relaxes. "Yeah, in a nutshell."

She wads her napkin up in her hands before throwing it on the table. Her voice gradually gets louder as she lays into him, pouring all of her emotions out for the whole restaurant to hear. "You want me to tell her I'm over you so you can live happily ever after? Newsflash, Nick Carter, I've never GOTTEN over you! I never had the chance! You took my virginity, you took my heart, you took my love and you stomped all over it! Yet it was all still yours! I can't tell her I got over you because I didn't! I LOST OUR BABY AND YOU DON'T GIVE A SHIT! Oh my God, I can't believe...HOW CAN YOU ASK ME TO DO THIS??"

            Blood drains from his face as she runs from the restaurant. He hastily throws money on the table to cover the bill and runs to follow her, but by the time he gets to the parking lot, she's gone. 

            He lowers his head, not only in shame, but in devastation. He always thought she was over him. Until tonight, he didn't realize the magnitude of what she felt. Or that she still loved him.

Slowly, he makes his way to his car. He can't stop thinking about Giselle. What she said, how she looked. He didn't only break her heart. He broke her spirit. He took everything she had to give and never once imagined what the final cost would be.  Putting his head on the steering wheel, he cries. How could he have done that to her? More importantly, how can he ever make it up to her.

Swiping the tears from his face, he starts the car. There's only one person who knows her well enough to know if he can fix this. The one person who knows her better than anyone. It's time for Nick to man up and talk to AJ.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 26

            Nick goes back to his hotel and calls AJ.  While he's not thrilled with meeting Nick to talk about Giselle, AJ agrees.  He walks into the bar at Nick's hotel, wondering what Nick's angle is.

            Once their seated, Nick says, "AJ, man, don't take this the wrong way, but you look like shit. You ok?"

            AJ just nods. "Fine Nick. What did you need to talk to me about?"

            Nick lowers his eyes. "Giselle. I didn't...AJ how did I fuck this up so badly? Why didn't you tell me she was still in love with me?"

            AJ watches Nick, his expression guarded. "I wanted her to get over you Nick. I wanted you to leave her alone. She deserves better than what you put her through and I don't want you to hurt her again." His eyes narrow. "You didn't...what did you do Nick?"

            Nick sighs. "Fuck, AJ, I thought she was over me. I asked her to talk to Sandy...to tell her we've been through for a long time. She freaking lost it on me in the restaurant."

            AJ's anger comes to a slow boil, but he keeps his voice in check. "What did you expect Nick? Look at what you did to her? You didn't even go to her when she lost the baby. Did you even grieve? Did you feel bad about it? Cause she did."

            Nick sighs. "You know I felt bad, AJ. But you know how fucked up I was. We both were. How was I supposed to feel something when I was doing everything in my power to be numb?  Shit, we both were."

            AJ rubs his neck. "I know. She and I made peace, but Nick...I don't think she's ever going to be able to trust you. You have to work this shit out with Sandy on your own and you have to let Giselle go."

            Nick drops his head in his hands. "AJ, the funny thing is I really do love her. I love her in ways I could never love Sandy. Until tonight, I didn't think she would ever love me back, but she does. What do I do?"

            AJ wants to tell him to go fuck himself. But watching Nick...this is something he's never seen. Nick vulnerable. Hell, he almost looks scared. AJ rolls the hem of his shirt in his fingers, a nervous habit he picked up on the road many years ago. "Nick...be honest...if you could choose the ONE person you'd want to spend the rest of your life with, who would you pick, Sandy or Giselle?"

            Nick raises his head and without hesitation, says, "Giselle. I'm not kidding Man. I never ever got over her. How do I make it right?"

            AJ sighs heavily. "Truthfully, I don't know if you can Nick. She's...different now. I mean, she's still my best friend and still busts my balls when I'm stupid, but she's so sad.  All the time. I don't know how to make her happy again." He watches Nick. "But you might can. IF you mean it. Cause Nick, so help me if you hurt her in any way, I swear by all that's holy I will beat the living shit out of you and leave you for dead in the desert."

            Nick's mouth drops. "You're fucking serious!"

            AJ decides to hold nothing back. "You're damn right I'm serious. Aside from my Mom and Brooke, Giselle is the most important person in my life. She put up with all kinds of shit from me being a non-existent friend. I will NOT let her down again and I damn sure won't let you hurt her again."

            Nick feels tears burn his eyes. He whispers, "I swear to God, AJ I love her. I always have and I know now I probably always will. Even if she doesn't give me a chance...Sandy was right...I do still love Giselle."

            AJ believes him. Maybe Nick is finally growing up. "What do you want me to do?"

            Nick bites his nails. "I don't know. How can I make her listen to me?"

            AJ snorts. "That won't be easy Nick."

            Nick nods. "I know. I fucked it up pretty good, didn't I?"

            AJ holds nothing back. "You fucked it up big time Nick. Now it's time to man up and admit that to her. Make HER believe you when you say you're sorry. And for the love of God, mean it when you say it."

            Nick nods. "I do mean it AJ. I love her. I do love Giselle."

            AJ watches Nick.  "Then leave her alone for a while. I'll go check on her on my way home, test the waters.  I mean it, I'll call you when I think she's ready to see you, ok? Till then, back off."

            Nick nods. "AJ...I don't know if it means anything now, but I am sorry."

            AJ chuckles. "Me too, Nick. You got fucked up because of me. Maybe it's time we grow up and become real men and own up to our mistakes."

            Nick eyes him curiously. "You ok, AJ?"

            AJ just shrugs. "Brooke wants to get married. I don't know if I'm to that point yet. I love her and I want to be with her the rest of my life...I just never thought marriage was for me."

            Nick nods. "Do you think marriage will change things between you and Brooke?" AJ shakes his head. "Then marry her! It gives her what she needs. Is that so hard?"

            AJ looks at Nick dumbfounded. "You know, for an idiot, you make a lot of sense."

            Nick tries to laugh, but it's forced. "I don't know, AJ. I think I messed up the best thing I ever had...I don't think I can ever love anyone else the way I do Giselle."

            AJ smiles.  "Now you know what Brooke means to me."

            Giselle makes it home and collapses against the front door, sliding to the floor sobbing. She can't believe she just did that. In public, no less. But...it forced her to realize something she's tried to avoid, ignore and pretend isn't real: she does still love Nick.

            She hits her head against the door and mutters, "How stupid can I be?"

            She stares off into space, the tears slowly drying up. Her eyes feel puffy and swollen and her body aches. She closes her eyes and prays for some sort of closure. Some way to move on and get over Nick.

            When AJ knocks on her door, it startles her. She raises her voice enough to ask, "Who is it?"

            When she hears, "It's me, Elle, open up!" she knows Nick called him. Pushing herself off the floor, she unlocks it and slowly pulls it open. When AJ sees her, he just opens his arms.  "Come here."

            She falls against him and he holds her tight. She doesn't have any tears left to cry. "AJ, what's wrong with me? Why can't I get over Nick and find a nice, NORMAL guy that will love me."

            He lays his head against hers. "You may not like my answer. Let's talk, Elle."

            After they sit, she says, "I met Nick tonight. He wants me to tell his girlfriend I don't love him anymore."

            AJ nods. "He told me." He smirks at her shocked look. "You shook him to the core tonight, Elle. He didn't think...he figured he was such an asshole to you that you hated him. He didn't realize you still love him."

            Fresh tears pool on her lashes. "I don't want to love him, AJ.  I want to hate him. I want to loathe him with a passion, but I just can't."

            He nods, reaching over to take her hand. "Elle...he does really love you."

            She shakes her head violently. "NO! Stop it AJ! Don't do this to me!"

            He keeps a tight hold on her so she can't run. "You're going to listen to everything I have to say...then I'll leave and we'll never talk about Nick again. Unless you want to. Agreed?"

            She nods warily and scoots farther away from him, curling up in a ball on the far corner of the couch. "Why AJ? Why do you want to talk about him now?"

            AJ sighs. "Because there are things you need to know. About our life, touring, and everything. Will you just listen?" She nods again. "Nick...I was a bad influence on Nick. None of the other guys would party with me. Nick was easy to manipulate, so I did.  I got him hooked on booze, cocaine, weed...you name it, we did it."

            Her mouth drops open. He looks so desolate. So guilty. "AJ...he was a grown man."

            AJ shakes his head. "No, he was a kid then. We both were. Kids playing grown up with a seemingly endless amount of money and women wanting to cater to our every desire. I'm not proud of it, Elle. I'm ashamed of most of it, and so is Nick."

            She looks bewildered. "What are you saying, AJ?"

            Taking a deep breath, he says, "Nick called me after you left tonight. Your...confession...nearly broke him. He...thought you hated him. He wasn't prepared to hear you say you still love him."

            Her heart starts to pound. "I don't...AJ, I can't love him. There's nothing left of my heart for him to break."

            AJ frowns. "You don't get it Elle. He loves you too. Real, honest-to-God love. I saw it tonight. We sat in the bar at his hotel and he cried. He gave up because he thought you hated him." When she doesn't say anything, he goes on. "Elle, he did...he was shattered about the baby. He...the booze and drugs were a way to feel numb...we couldn't cope with pain so we buried it and covered it with anything we could get our hands on. I won't lie, I was in bad shape. Maybe worse than Nick, I don't know."

            She scoots closer to him. "AJ, this isn't just about Nick, is it?"

            He shakes his head. "Not really. But we're gonna talk about him first. Elle, can you give him one last chance? Would you?"

            She leans back a little. "I don't know, AJ. There's a lot...it's been over ten years." She looks away. "He's the only man I've ever been with AJ."

            AJ blushes as bad as she does. "I don't need to know details, ok?" She can't help but giggle at his panicked tone of voice. He chuckles with her before saying, "I believe him. I believe he loves you. I told him I'd talk to you but it's your decision whether or not you want to give him a chance."

            She nods. "I need to think about it AJ. I don't know."

            He nods. "Nick's going to leave you alone. I told him you need space. When you're ready...call me. Call him. I don't know..."

            She scoots closer to him. "What's wrong AJ?"

            He shrugs. "Brooke wants to get married. Until tonight, I didn't think I did. Then Nick said something that totally made sense."

            Curiosity gets the best of her. "What did he say?"

            A small smile tugs at his lips. "He said for me to marry her. If I love her enough to spend the rest of my life with her, I should marry her and give her what she needs. My full commitment."

            Giselle scoots closer to him and he pulls her into his arms. While she's snuggled against him, she says, "He's right, AJ. If you know she's the one, then marriage is just a piece of paper telling the world you found your soulmate."

            AJ kisses the top of her head. "Will you be my best man?"

            She laughs. "Only if you're my maid-of-honor...if..."

            He squeezes her. "He's not gonna hurt you, Elle. Give him a chance."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 27

            Giselle decides to throw herself into work and not think about Nick. While she gives it all she's got, when she falls in bed at night, he's the one on her mind.  After two weeks she knows she has to talk to someone. After making a date to have dinner with Kendall, she immerses herself in paperwork at the store. 

She always thought managing a business was what she wanted, but the day to day tediousness of it is boring her to tears. At the moment, she's filing paperwork on one of her newest employees when she glances up at the security feeds on the monitor. There, in the stock room, is the new employee, plus two others and they are smoking. She shakes her head, slowly standing.

As she walks toward the stock room, she has an overwhelming urge to just run. Leave it all behind. She wants to move to a place where there are no people, no phones and no responsibilities.

When she slips into the stockroom, the smell of smoke assaults her senses. She stops and listens as Jim says, "Open the door.  It's getting bad in here."

She hears the door open as Ed, the new guy, asks, "So, what's the deal with the boss? She's fucking hot."

Rob snorts. "Don't waste your time. She's the freaking ice queen."

Ed guffaws. "What, none of you tapped that?"

Rob replies, "Are you kidding? She's so freaking straight laced it's unreal. I can't even have wet dreams about her because she's so closed off. I tried flirting a few times, but it's like she doesn't know what to do with a man. Hell, one day she had on this super-low-cut blouse and I could see everything when I stood over her in the office. I had a hard on like you wouldn't believe and she didn't notice."

Jim says, "From what I heard about her last job, she's a tease. Kept this one guy going, went to dinner, he spent money on her, but she wouldn't put out. Now what kind of chick doesn't spread ‘em for an expensive meal? Seriously?"

Giselle bites the inside of her jaw. Is she a tease? Did she lead Mark on? Is that what she's doing with Nick? Leading him on? Tears sting her eyes and she turns, blindly leaving the stock room.

Once in her office, she starts to hyperventilate. Her assistant manager comes in, finding her doubled over gasping for air. As scared as she is, she starts to call 9-1-1 until Giselle stops her. "Don't!"

Kate says, "What's wrong Giselle? Are you sick?"

A hysterical laugh bubbles up from deep inside Giselle. "Sick? I guess you could say I'm sick. Oh my God, how could I...I didn't mean...Kate, I have to get out of here. I'm sorry, I can't do this..."

She grabs her purse as Kate says, "Giselle, wait...tell me what's wrong. Let me call someone..."

Giselle fumbles for her keys. "I'll be fine. Don't...I'm sorry Kate. I'm so sorry."

She stumbles out of the office and bursts through the stock room to the back door. The guys are stubbing out their cigarettes and all of them have an "oh shit" look on their faces. She blushes deeply and hurries past them, running to her car.

Once inside the sweltering vehicle, she feels like she's going to vomit. She starts the engine and is pulling out as Kate comes rushing out the back door yelling, "Giselle WAIT!"

Giselle floors it, almost side-swiping a car as she screeches onto the road. Horns blare as she weaves in and out of traffic and hits the highway. She doesn't pay attention to anything and just drives.

An hour later, she finds herself parked outside her childhood home. Memories wash over her in waves. The way her mother treated her, the days she spent crying, praying someone would take her away. She watches closely as a woman in her mid fifties comes out onto the porch to water flowers. Her mother.

She's shocked at how she's changed. Gray hair mixes in with the dark blonde and she's lost a good thirty pounds. Giselle seems lost in time as her mother slowly makes her way across the porch with the watering can stopping once to pick up a gray tabby and give it a hug.

Tears sting her eyes. She was never allowed to have a cat. They were a nuisance, her mother said. Now the cat gets more love than Giselle ever did. She looks back up to find her eyes locked on her mothers. Her mother seems shocked to see her and for a brief moment, a smile lights her face. She takes a step towards the car, but Giselle springs into action, starting the car and taking off before coming face to face with the woman who bore her.

She drives till her car runs out of gas.  She sits on the side of the road and stares at an orange grove. How did her life become this? Why can't she just go back and start over again? As she's mulling over things in her mind, her cell phone jars her from the past.

When she answers, she hears Kendall frantically asking, "Where are you? Giselle? Are you ok? Kate called. You scared her to death, what's going on? Giselle? GISELLE?"

Finally, she manages to quietly say, "I'm here."

Kendall sighs. "Where is here?"

She looks around. "I don't know. I just...drove. Kendall, am I hopeless as a woman?"

Fear laces Kendall's voice. "What? What are you talking about?"

Giselle sniffles. "I love Nick. I always have. I can't let go because I love him. I can't move on because I love him. The men at work...they were right. I'm a freaking ice queen because I love Nick Carter!" She hangs up and throws her phone into the floor board, ignoring the continuous ringing as she gets out and climbs over the barbed wire fence surrounding the trees.

Deep gashes cover her arms and legs, but she doesn't feel it. She runs straight back through the trees, finally collapsing half a mile from the road. She hugs a tree trunk and sobs. "Nick...oh Nick why couldn't we make it work?"

AJ panics when Kendall calls him and explains the situation. He and Nick are in a conference call with Brian and Howie, talking about how to get Kevin back into the group.  He leaves the room quickly, saying, "Kendall, where is she? What happened?"

Kendall says, "I don't know. Her assistant manager called me, I'm her emergency contact. She said Giselle flipped out and just left, squealing tires and crying. I called her...AJ she sounds...sad. Angry. Something's wrong. Bad. She's not answering now. She kept talking about Nick and how she loves him. AJ, we have to find her, but the police...she has to be missing 24 hours before they'll look for her."

AJ says, "I'll find her. Give me a minute. I'll call you."

AJ quickly hangs up and calls his manager. Nick walks in just in time to hear him say, "I don't care how, I just have to find her. Get a private detective. Have them track her cell phone, her car, SOMETHING."

Nick steps up. "What's wrong? What's happened?"

AJ throws him a frosty glance. "Giselle is missing. She had some sort of breakdown at work. We can't find her."

Nick pales, pulling out his phone. He presses a number on his phone and waits. "Billy, it's Nick. Where is she?" AJ listens dumbfounded as Nick says, "Off 27? How far?" AJ turns off his phone. "Dundee? OK, stay close, I'm on my way."

When he hangs up, AJ pounces. "You had someone following her?"

Nick nods. "Sandy didn't handle the break up well. She threatened Giselle. I knew G would never let me protect her now so I've had Billy and the guys taking shifts. James called Billy when Giselle tore out of work like a bat out of hell. They were getting ready to call me."

Nick turns and heads out the door. AJ follows, ranting, "Where the hell are you going?"

Without a backward glance, Nick climbs into the car. "To take care of the woman I love."

AJ scrambles in quickly. "Not without me you're not. That's my best friend you know."

Nick nods as he backs out onto the street. "I know AJ. And right now, maybe she needs you more than me, but I can't just sit here." He signals, turning at the corner. "Call Kendall. Tell her we know where she is and we're going to get her."

As Nick maneuvers traffic, AJ calls Kendall. She's as shocked as AJ about Nick's take charge attitude, but at this moment, she's more than happy to know that Giselle is ok. After promising to call her back, AJ hangs up and a heavy silence fills the car.  Apprehension hangs thick in the air as Nick drives as fast as possible to get to the woman he loves.

When Nick parks behind her car, James pulls up beside him.  "She went into the grove here. There's blood on the fence, she must have gotten cut up pretty bad. I was gonna follow, but Billy said you were on your way, just to keep an eye out."

Nick gets out. "Thanks. Call a tow truck for her car. I'm going to find her."

AJ follows closely. "We are."

James nods. "Throw something over that fence first. It's wicked."

Nick tugs off his shirt and drapes it over the fence before crossing it. The blood on it makes him blanch, but he's determined to find Giselle. AJ follows closely, swallowing the bile that bubbles up in his throat. They quietly follow the path Giselle took.

When Nick first sees her, relief floods his body. He and AJ slow their pace, trying to discern the best way to approach her without scaring her. Until Nick sees her face. Tears have stained her cheeks and blood is smeared under her nose from the cuts on her hands where she wiped her face. AJ starts to charge forward, but Nick grabs him. When their eyes meet, AJ sees it. It's time for Nick to prove himself.

AJ steps back as Nick slowly walks over to Giselle. He sinks to his knees in front of her and whispers, "G?"

She slowly opens her eyes, fresh tears springing forth. "Nick?"

He reaches out and wipes her face gently. "What happened?"

She sniffles, shying away from his touch. Pain lances through his body as she pulls away, but he knows why she did. She's still unsure of him. With a shaky voice she says, "I'm hopeless."

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 28

            Nick puts his hands on his knees, his heart breaking. "G, you're not hopeless. You're...this is all my fault. I fell in love with you and was too stupid to hold on to it. I made so many mistakes. I was young and stupid and arrogant. I hurt you in the worst way possible and I don't know how you can ever forgive me...or even love me."

            She sniffs, letting her head fall against the tree. "I never stopped loving you Nick."

            With her eyes closed, she doesn't see him move closer.  He gently takes her hand. When she opens her eyes, he says, "Giselle, we need to get you to a doctor. You're cut up pretty bad."

            She looks past him to see AJ standing close by. He nods slightly then turns away. She looks at Nick and says, "How did you find me?"

            He blushes. "I've had a security team watching you."

            Confusion lights her face and laces her voices. "Security? Why?"

            He clears his throat. "Sandy wasn't thrilled when I broke up with her. She...threatened you. I wanted...I had to make sure you were safe until she got over this and moved on. I know I should have told you, but AJ...he said I needed to give you space."

            She looks back at AJ, sitting against a tree smoking and talking on his phone. She turns back to Nick. "He did?" Nick nods. "I don't know if...Nick, I just don't know how to..."

            He smiles tenderly. "We'll take it slow. One day at a time. Can you give me one last chance, G? It's not too late, is it?"

            She slowly shakes her head. "I don't...think so Nick. I've never been able to get over you. Just...please, don't say it if you don't mean it. I can't take it."

            He leans closer to her. "I love you," he whispers quietly. "Let me prove it."

            She lets him pull her close, cradling her body against his chest. When his arms close around her, she sighs deeply, feeling a peace she hasn't felt in a long, long time.

            After a trip to a walk in clinic to have her cuts cleaned and bandaged, Nick takes her home. He wants to stay, but he knows it is her decision. She glances at him anxiously before saying, "Can you give me some time? I just need to sort some things out."

            He nods, his heart plummeting. "Sure, whatever you need."

            She turns to AJ. "Can you stay a while?"

            He nods, turning to Nick. "I'll take care of her Nick."

            Nick shakes his hand. "I know. Call me if...just call me."

            He walks away dejected. All he wants is to take care of her, but right now, she doesn't want him there. He has to accept that.

            Giselle watches him drive away. She wanted him to go, but now that he's gone, she feels empty. She turns to AJ. "What did I do AJ?"

            He stares at her perplexed. "What do you mean, Elle?"

            She stammers, "I made him leave. Why? Why did I do that?"

            He says, "Elle, did you want him to stay?" When she nods frantically, he says, "I'll call him. But...before I do...tell me what happened."

            She shrugs. "Nothing."

            He opens the door for her. "Bullshit. Something happened. Now what was it?"

            She sits on the sofa, picking at the tape on one of her bandages. He takes her hand to stop her and waits somewhat patiently for her to start talking. "I overheard something at work...and I realized...AJ, I lead men on then stop them cold. I'm...frigid."

            He stares at her. Then laughs. She scowls at him and he gets his mirth under control. "Elle, you are the LEAST frigid person I know. You don't lead guys on. Hell, Baby, you don't have to. You're sexy, men notice. But just because you don't fall into bed with them...it doesn't make you frigid."

            She snaps. "Well what does it make me?"

            He smirks. "You're in love, you idiot."

            She feels the air whoosh from her lungs as she stares at him. "What?" she whispers.

            He strokes her cheek. "Elle, you love Nick. Nick loves you. You're not frigid. You're...committed. You're committed to him being the only one. Maybe it's a little warped, but that's what it is."

            Her mouth drops open. "Warped? Why is it warped?"

            He sighs. "Elle, think about it. How many women in 2012 can say they've only ever slept with one guy? Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking you. I just think you're in the wrong time period. Nick doesn't deserve you. But he loves you more than anything. He'd leave if he thought it would make you happiest. But it won't, will it?" She violently shakes her head no. Just the thought of Nick leaving makes her sick. "Want me to have him come back?"

            She thinks about it long and hard. "No. I want to go to him. Will you take me? My car...where's my car?"

            AJ smiles. "Nick had it towed. The boy's crazy for you Elle. You're making the right choice." He clears his throat. "But I'm telling you like I told him. I'll be watching. If he hurts you, I get to hurt him."

            She almost laughs. Then she sees how serious he is. She hugs his neck and whispers, "Where would I be without you, AJ?"

            He squeezes her. "Do I still get to be your maid of honor?"

            She giggles. "You wearing a dress?"

            He laughs. "For you? You bet!"

            She squeals as he tickles her. "I'll settle for a tux." He lets her go. She whispers, "Thanks."

            He tweaks her nose. "I love you Elle. Now, let's go see Nick."

            She looks down at her dirty, blood stained clothes. "Can I change first?"

            He laughs. "I'll let Ken know you're ok. You are ok, right?"

            She nods, tears stinging her eyes as she thinks how lucky she is to have AJ and Kendall in her life. "I will be, AJ."

            He kisses her cheek. "Good. Now, go put on your face for Nick."

            She stares at herself in the mirror, wondering if she's made the right choice. She wants to impress Nick...but at the same time, she wants to just be herself. She did think to put on a racy red lace bra and panty set under her blue jeans and black t-shirt. This may not be about making love with Nick...but part of her can't deny the fact that all she wants to do is fall into bed with him and never leave. She wants every part of him.

            When she walks downstairs, AJ just stares at her. She begins to feel self conscious. "What?"

            He smiles. "Nothing...you just...Elle you haven't changed a bit. You still look like the same, fresh-faced girl who graduated with honors from our beat up, run down high school."

            She blushes. "Stop, I'm a lot older."

            He shakes his head. "I'm serious. Come here." She sits as he pulls out his wallet and takes out her senior picture. "Look. The only thing different is your hair is shorter. You look exactly the same. Beautiful."

            She stares at the picture, scarcely believing it's so old. She stares at AJ and whispers, "Wow."

            He smiles. "Come on, let's go. Nick needs to be put out of his misery and you two need to talk. REALLY talk. OK?"

            She nods and hugs him tightly. "Thanks for everything AJ."

            He kisses her cheek and with a husky voice whispers, "I love you, Elle. You're the little sister I never had. I'm going to take care of you."

            Howie and Brian had managed to get AJ's car to Giselle's house while she changed clothes. When he drops her off at the house Nick is renting, she's a bit apprehensive, but she tells AJ to leave. This is something she has to do alone.

            When she rings the doorbell, her stomach clenches. What if he's not alone? Before she can push the panic button, the door opens and they are standing face to face. He's wearing unbuttoned jeans, no shirt and no shoes. His hair is still damp from the shower and she loses her train of thought staring at him. Finally, he says, "Hey," pulling her out of her trance.

            She smiles shyly. "Hi."

            He looks behind her before saying, "You ok?"

            She nods. "AJ dropped me off.  If it's a bad time..."

            He jumps. "No, it's fine. Come in, I just...I was just in the shower."

            He steps back and she walks in slowly. Once the door is shut, she says, "I'm not bothering you, am I?"

            He closes the door. "No, G, you aren't bothering me. I'm just...surprised. I thought you wanted space."

            She turns to face him, watching as he moves with grace to the couch and motions for her to sit. She's a bundle of nerves so she stands fidgeting. "I thought I did too. Until you left."

            He watches her intently. "What are you saying, Giselle."

            She steps closer to him. "I...still love you Nick."

            He smiles. The first real smile to light his face since the first day he met her almost 20 years ago. "I love you too, G. Now what?"

            She smiles back. "We talk. Get to know each other. See where it goes."

            He reaches out and gently takes her hand. "I'd like that. Want some dinner?"

            She nods. "I'd like that."

            He leads her into the kitchen and for the next few hours, they talk. Really talk. And for the first time, for them both, they feel everything is going right.

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 29

                It's been almost 8 months since Giselle walked into Nick's place and they started to really see each other.  Giselle had taken a month long leave from work and spent that month seeing a therapist and finding ways to heal her heart.

            It's the last Saturday in October. The spirit of Halloween is in the air. Nick and Giselle are going to a party at Brian and Meagan's to celebrate the birth of their third child and first daughter, Kendall Giselle, and to celebrate Halloween for their two oldest, Kevin Howard and Nickolas Alexander.

            Giselle is putting the finishing touches on her princess makeup. Nick's idea of going as Mario and the princess from the Mario Brothers video game made Giselle laugh. He's just a big kid at heart. She smiles in the mirror thinking about what a great Daddy Nick will be.

            A chill sweeps over her body. She glances at the clock on the bedside table and sees the date and her blood runs cold.  It's the anniversary of her miscarriage. She blinks rapidly, her body reacting as it always does when she thinks about the baby she lost. 

She stands and moves to the window, covering her stomach with her hands. She looks up at the sky, watching as the suns few final rays turn the approaching night sky a deep shade of reddish purple.  She looks down to see Nick getting out of his car. The fake black hair and mustache looks weird on him.

When he looks up and sees her, he smiles...but the smile falters as he takes in the sad expression on her face. He has a key, so she knows he'll let himself in.  She turns and checks herself in the mirror one last time as she hears the door open.

She's just stepping out of her room when Nick comes up the stairs. "Hey, Sweetheart, what's the matter?"

She shakes her head, allowing him to pull her into a loose embrace. She lays her head on his shoulder and whispers, "I just...I realized what the date is."

He rubs her back. "What? What is it?"

She sighs deeply, trembling. "I...lost our baby ten years ago."

She feels his body tense.  He buries his head in her neck and whispers, "Jesus, Giselle, I'm so sorry!"

She hugs him tighter, drawing on his strength as she lets the memories and sadness flow out of her. When the tears subside, she pulls back, shocked to find tears falling down Nick's face. She gently wipes them away with her fingers. "Nick..." Her voice barely a whisper.

A shudder rolls through his body. "G, I love you. I'd give anything if I could go back and fix this."

She leans up and gently kisses his lips. "It wasn't meant to be, Nick. I've accepted that. It's just...hard sometimes."

He presses his forehead to hers. "I cried. The day I found out, I cried. It was the first time I ever cried and the guys thought I was weak. Hell, I was weak...but I was hurting so bad, G.  I drank to forget. I did drugs to forget.  But it never stopped hurting."

She pulls his lips to hers for a frantic kiss. Their bodies pressed tightly together, she pours every bit of love she has for him into that one, heart stopping moment. When their lips part, she whispers, "We can still have a baby Nick."

He searches her eyes. "You want to?"

She nods shyly. "I want it more than anything Nick."

His smile is full of love. "In that case, I think there's something you have to know." At her puzzled expression, he has her sit on the couch and goes down on one knee in front of her. With her hands in his, he whispers, "I love you Giselle. More than anything, I love you. I want to marry you. Will you marry me? Be my bride, be my wife, be the mother of my children?"

Her mouth drops open. She watches him pull a ring box from the pocket of his white overalls and slowly open it. Nestled inside is a princess cut diamond in a platinum setting. She's shaking as she drags her eyes up to his. "Nick?" she whispers, hoping it's not a dream.

He kisses the back of her hand before running his thumb over her fingers. "Will you marry me G?"

She nods slightly. "Yes."

His forehead falls against hers as he slides the ring on her finger. He kisses it before moving his lips up to hers. When they move apart, he sighs. "I love you Baby."

With her fingers in his hair, she whispers, "I love you too."

When they get to the party, Kendall and Meagan immediately spy the ring. While the girls ooh and aah over it, AJ pulls Nick to the side. "So, gonna take the plunge are you?"

Nick nods, watching the smile on Giselle's face light up the room. He still sees a glimpse of a shadow in her eyes, and he's sure there's one that mirrors it in his. Today will always be sad for them. "It's about time I grow up; don't you think so, AJ?"

AJ snorts. "Way PAST time you grew up Nick. But I meant what I said."

Nick nods, frustrated with AJ. "I know, AJ. I'd die before I intentionally hurt her. You ought to know that by now."

AJ watches him. Nick never takes his eyes off Giselle. The way he looks at her.  AJ knows Nick loves her. He says, "I'm happy for you both, Nick. I mean that."

Nick spares him a look and says, "Thanks. That means a lot AJ. I promise. I'm going to take care of her."

AJ smiles. "I know you will. Congratulations."

After the engagement was announced, Giselle moved in with Nick.  Even though she wants a quiet wedding, he is thinking big.  They decide on a Christmas wedding. It only gives them a couple of months to plan, but Nick is determined to make it a day Giselle will never forget.

To do that, he decides to broach a subject with Giselle that honestly, he's been avoiding. Her mother. While he knows they will never have a loving mother-daughter relationship, he can tell Giselle still has issues with her past. When she asked Howie to give her away since his father had passed, she genuinely seemed lost. Of course Howie agreed, but deep down, everyone had figured out Giselle still hurts over her mother's indifference.

A week before Thanksgiving, Nick asked AJ, Brooke, Kendall and Grant to come for lunch while Giselle was at work. When he explained what he was thinking, Grant and Brooke seemed unsure. But Kendall and AJ agreed with him. Giselle's mother has made it impossible for Giselle to be truly happy.

Later that evening, Nick watches as she takes off her robe to slip into bed. He takes her hand and says, "G, you're off tomorrow right?" She nods. "Can we go somewhere after lunch?"

Her brow furrows. "Sure, what did you have in mind?"

He clears his throat. "Going to see your mother."

She pulls her hand away and turns to face him.  "Seriously?"

He just nods warily. "G, you're so...closed off about your mother...I just think you need some kind of closure with her.  Put her behind you and move on."

She bites her lip. "Did you talk to my therapist?" He shakes his head no, confused. She sighs. "She thinks I need closure too. I'm just not sure I can do it."

Nick takes her hand once again and whispers, "You can. I'll be there with you. You don't have to go alone."

She's shocked. "You'd go with me?"

He pouts. "Giselle, do you really think I'd let you handle this all alone?"

She throws her arms around him. "Oh Nick, can I do this?"

He kisses her shoulder. "Of course you can. We can do it together."

When Giselle parks outside her mother's house, she's tense.  Nick feels it, but he truly believes she needs to do this.  He waits until she's ready before opening his car door.

After helping her from the car, they slowly walk to the porch. Her mother comes out onto the porch. There's no hint of emotion on her face. "Hey."

Giselle clears her throat. "Mother, this is Nick."

After the introductions, an awkward silence ensues. Finally, her mother says, "Why are you here, Giselle?"

Giselle swallows hard.  "I'm trying to figure out why you could never be a real mother to me."

She shrugs indifferently. "After your father left...well, let's just say he wanted a kid, I didn't. Then he couldn't hack it."

Giselle shudders. "Who was he? What was his name?"

She sits on the porch swing, not offering for Nick or Giselle to sit. "His name was Christopher. He was my boss.  We had a good thing going till I got knocked up. Oh, he said it was wonderful and he'd leave his wife for us, but he ran. The cold blooded prick ran as fast as his legs could carry him, leaving me saddled with you." She looks at Nick's car, then back to Giselle. "But you're not doing so bad for yourself. You got a rich boyfriend. When you gonna pay me back for the life you stole from me?"

Giselle stammers. "Pay you back? Are you serious? You put me through hell. You let your boyfriends try to paw me and look at me. What do I owe you?"

Nick grabs Giselle around the waist. Holding her tightly, he says, "Because you are her mother, this will end here. Yes, I have money and with that money I can afford to do a lot of things. You even THINK of trying to hurt Giselle or weasel back into her life, you WILL answer to me. I know things. I know the things you want left buried. Understand?"

Giselle doesn't understand. She glances up at Nick, wondering what he's talking about. Before she can question him, her mother stutters, "How...d-d-dare you! Get off my property! GO! I don't want anything from you. Leave me be!"

Nick turns with Giselle, stepping off the porch. Turning back, he says, "Remember. I know things you don't want to get out. Leave Giselle alone."

Once in the car, Giselle turns on him. "What? What do you know?"

He looks at her before starting the car and backing out of the driveway. Once the house is out of sight, he pulls over. "Giselle, she has a past. An ugly one. I didn't want to tell you..."

She takes his hand. "Please, Nick. Tell me."

He sighs. "She was a hooker. She worked the streets in Daytona and was arrested a number of times. Every time the same man bailed her out. Christopher Brandon."

Christopher. Her father. "You mean...my...father?"

Nick shrugs. "I don't know. Maybe. I tried to contact him. He passed away a few years ago.  Alcohol killed him. He was...he was dirty, G. Drugs, gambling, weapons, prostitution, he was into it. And...she played a big part of it."

Giselle starts to shake. Nick leans closer and whispers, "I'm here Baby. I'm always going to be here. I wasn't going to tell you, but you had to know being away from her was the best thing that could ever happen to you."

She looks at him through her tears. "No Nick. YOU are the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you."

He wipes her tears and kisses her nose. "I love you too, G. Ready to go home?"

She smiles timidly. "Yes. Take me home."      

Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 30

            Christmas morning dawns and Giselle wakes up early. She smiles as she watches Nick sleep. Their wedding day is finally here. Thankfully, she convinced him to scale it down quite a bit. There will be roughly 100 guests and the only celebrities in attendance will be his band mates.

            She slips quietly from the bed and goes downstairs. The wedding and reception is being held at the church she found just before she and Nick decided to try again. She fully believes God answered her prayers when he brought Nick back into her life.

            After putting on coffee to brew, she slips into the living room, turning on the Christmas tree lights.  She reaches behind the couch and pulls out the gifts she had bought Nick and slides them under the tree. She curls up on the floor by the tree and calls AJ.

            He answers on the second ring, sounded half asleep. "What?"

            She giggles. "Merry Christmas AJ!"

            He groans. "Elle? What the hell, it's 6:00 am!"

            Smiling, she falls back on the carpet, staring up at the ceiling. "It's 6 am on my wedding day AJ! As maid-of-honor, shouldn't you bring me breakfast or something?"

            She hears Brooke in the background saying, "AJ, go talk downstairs! I wanna sleep."

            She sighs. "I'm sorry, AJ. I shouldn't have called so early. Go back to sleep."

            He stifles a yawn as he says, "Nah, it's ok. Are you ok? You sound...sad."

            Closing her eyes, she whispers, "AJ...AJ I'm pregnant. I don't know how to tell Nick."

            He whistles. "Just tell him, Elle. You know he'll be excited."

            She bites her lip. "But AJ...I'm so scared.  What if I...what if this one...I don't want him to be upset if..."

            He says, "Elle, you gotta stop that right now. Worrying isn't good for either of you. And he should know. You know that."

            She sighs, choking off a sob. "I know AJ. I'm just afraid."

            From the steps, Nick questions, "Afraid of what?"

            She turns to him, her eyes locking on his. "AJ, I gotta go. Nick's awake. See you at noon?"

            He chuckles. "Yes Bridezilla. I'm there at noon."

            After she hangs up, Nick says, "You're afraid to marry me?"

            Standing, she runs up to him and throws her arms around his neck. "NO! Nick...Nick...I'm..." She steps back and reaches up to cup his face. "I'm pregnant."

            His eyes widen. His hands move up to her hips. He looks down at her still flat stomach and he whispers, "You're sure?"

            She nods. "I took the test a couple of days ago." She bites her lip before whispering, "What if something happens Nick?"

            He presses his forehead to hers. "It won't G. Have you seen a doctor?"

            She shakes her head no. "I have an appointment January 10. Will you go with me?"

            He smiles, holding her closer. "I'd go anywhere for you."

            She can't stop the laughter that bubbles up inside of her. "You're so corny Nick."

            He kisses her gently. "You love me like that."

            She sighs, snuggling in his arms. "I do Nick. I love you just the way you are."

            After a breakfast of Belgian waffles, made for her by Nick, Giselle pulls him to the living room and they sit together on the floor in front of the tree. He laughs with her as she pulls out gifts for him.  He reaches under to the back of the tree and pulls out a stack of gifts for her.  Just like two kids, Christmas paper is flying as they rip open their packages.

            Nick loved the cuff links she got him to wear for the ceremony. They are silver and have Nick's and Giselle's initials engraved on them with the date.  She also gave him a box full of ‘honeymoon' goodies, which included massage oil, handcuffs, a mask and other assorted toys.  By the time Nick had the last item out of the bag, his comments about what he wanted to do with them had Giselle ready to skip the ceremony and begin the honeymoon. 

            His third gift was more sentimental. It was a journal she had kept since she started therapy. A journal of her feelings about Nick...about all the things she's been through and how she feels about him now. With tears in his eyes, Nick pulls her into his arms and whispers, "I'll make it all up to you, G. If it takes the rest of my life, I'll make it up."

            She kisses his cheek and whispers, "You don't have to Nick. I forgave you a long time ago. We're moving forward now. You, me and our baby."

            He hands her the journal back and says, "In that case, why don't you keep writing in this. Maybe we both can. Fill it up and someday, maybe our baby can look at it and know we went through hell to get back to each other."

            She smiles and wipes away her tears. They put the journal aside and Nick hands her a gift.  When she opens it, she gasps in shock. It's a diamond choker with a sapphire tear drop stone hanging from it.  When her eyes meet his, he says, "Kendall said you had to have something blue. Is this ok?"

            She leans forward, kissing him gently. "It's beautiful, Nick. Thank you."

            His smile makes her ache. She can tell he put so much thought into his gifts that he was worried if she'd like them.  As she gingerly sets aside the necklace, he hands her another box.  She opens it to find a stack of papers.  Looking up at him, confused, he says, "I want to build us a home. But I want it to be exactly what you want. SO...I bought the land and thought maybe when we get back from the honeymoon, we can work on it together."

            She stares at the papers. "Nick...a home.  For us? Really?"

            He tilts her face up to his with a finger and whispers, "Really. OK?"

            She throws herself against him and sobs, "Nick...Nick it's perfect!"

            He holds her tightly, kissing her neck.  She snuggles against him and he whispers, "Feeling up for one more gift?"

            She nods into his neck.  "Nick, you've done so much.  More than...you overwhelm me."

            He says, "I didn't pay a thing for this one." She leans back and looks at him inquisitively. "I'm giving you me." Her lower lip quivers. He kisses it before saying, "I've been the biggest fool in the world, G, but I know exactly what I have with you. I won't take that for granted again."

            With her cheek pressed to his, she whispers, "I love you Nick."

            Closing his eyes, he whispers, "I love you too, Giselle."

            After an afternoon of laughter and tears with AJ, Kendall and Meagan, Giselle finds herself in her wedding gown waiting for Howie to come and get her and walk her down the aisle. She fingers the sapphire dangling on her choker and thinks about Nick. About how much she loves him and how they've been through so much.

            A knock on the door draws her from her trance. She turns, seeing AJ walk in wearing a black tux looking as handsome as can be. He walks over to her and takes her hands and whispers, "You look beautiful Elle."

            She blushes and says, "My maid-of-honor is going to outshine me though." 

            He laughs and strikes a pose. Laughter bubbles up inside her and he loves the sound. "Elle, I'm so glad you're happy. You deserve only the best."

            She steps forward and puts her hands on his shoulders.  "I have the best. I have you, my friend. We've been through a lot, haven't we?"

            He smiles at her, tears swimming in his eyes. "We have. I'm proud of you Elle. I happy for you. And I love you."

            She smiles at him and whispers, "I love you too."

            He leans down to kiss her cheek. His lips land on hers and they both freeze for a split second before he hauls her against his body and deepens the kiss. Her heartbeat races and their lips part. She stares up at him, seeing for the first time that AJ loves her. LOVES loves her. What's more, she knows deep down in her heart she loves him too. He strokes her cheek and whispers, "Don't marry him, Elle. Marry me."

THE END