Behind the lime light - Chapter 1
Alexander James McLean was bored. Bored and tired. The reason for this feeling was called a plane and he was once again on his way to another country to do another small tour. This time it was Canada that was getting the visit. They were scheduled to do a few concerts, interviews and TV shows. It was a one and a half week trip and the capital Quebec was their first stop.

He wasn�t alone on this flight since both Howie and Nick had boarded with him in Orlando earlier that morning. Kevin and Brian, who had been at home over their week long vacation, were flying in from Lexington on a later flight.

Lucky Bastards. They didn�t have to get up at four in the morning to catch a connecting flight to Miami and straight from there to Quebec. Looking at his watch he found that they had about three more hours left in the air and his stomach was growling with hunger. Hopefully they would soon be served food since he was absolutely starving!

Johnny had booked them coach and the space was so cramped that he had a hard time stretching out. It was a full seated plane, so booked that his mom, who usually traveled with them, had to take a later plane. AJ sighed. He wished that Lou and Johnny could at least for once let them ride business class, especially since the management was traveling that class!

Still everything could be relative and it was way better to the planes they had to travel with when they were in Asia the week before this one. He had to admit that the two week long tour to 10 different countries in Asia had been pretty fun, but also very exhausting. Once they got over the bad jet lag that plagued them all it was time to move to another city; another country. On top of everything they had caught a nasty flu bug that had followed them all the time and at on occasion, AJ had been so sick that he had to cancel a concert. Lou had raised hell but fortunately his mom had backed him up and he got a red card. As a matter of fact he was still feeling the side effects from the flu and the cold that he had for a while didn�t seem to shake.

The tempo had been pretty hard and there had been times when AJ had wanted to say 'Fuck it all' but he�d always stopped. After all this was his life and he loved being on stage performing. He could thank his lucky stars that he�d been so fortunate to do something like this and the day when he stopped being grateful he knew it was time to quit. But hopefully this wouldn�t come for a while, especially since they hadn�t made it in the states yet.

He sighed, getting his friends attention.

"You�re ok man?" Howie Dorough glanced up from the book he was reading.

"Yeah sure."

"Ok, what you�re thinking about?" His friend wanted to know.

"Eh...you know..nothing. Life you know." AJ shrugged not wanting to talk about what was on his mind. Even if Howie or D as he otherwise was called was someone that stood close to him he had no intention to reveal what was on his mind. It wasn�t that Howie wasn�t a good listener. No it was more that he didn�t feel like talking serious in a crowded plane and also the Latino looked like he could need a good days sleep instead of listening to his problems.

"Anything you wanna talk about?" Howie had put his book down, prepared to listen.

"Nah I�m fine."

"You sure?"

"Yes!" "Ok," Howie turned back to his book again. "But if you wanna talk man, I�m here you know."

"Yeah I know." AJ grinned. This was so much like the friend he knew. Howie wasn�t much of a talkative person but when he said something it was either important or words of comfort. Sweet D was a person that always wanted to make sure that everything was all right. He was being the groups counselor.

Next to him, beside the window, sat his other travel companion, 16 year old Nickolas Gene Carter. He appeared to be sleeping but AJ knew better. Nick hated to fly and this was his way to cope with fear. Escape by sleep.

Catching a glance at his friend he noticed that he was pretty pale. 'Not that the kid got a tan or anything but he seemed almost sickly' AJ thought with a sigh. The last thing they needed was that one of them would be struck with a bug since this often lead to the others being infected and thenwho would do the show? He hoped that the paleness on his friend's cheeks was just from the fear of flying combined with a sleepless night.

"He�s asleep?" It was Howie making sure that Nick is doing fine.

"Mmm..I think so."

"Good he needed that. Did you see how pale and exhausted he looked over at the airport? You could think that he�d been on a long tour instead of coming back from a break."

"Yeah." AJ nodded. "But you know how Nick is. He has probably tried to fit in everything in his spare time. You know meeting friends and playing in that band of his." AJ grinned. "What�s that band called? Fu..Funky something.."

"Funky Chickens." Howie corrected him. "Yes you�re probably right."

"That�s a hell of weird name," AJ commented, shaking his head.

"Well, what do you expect by Kaos?" Howie said with a smile. "Did you ever listen to them?"

"Nope Nick�s been pretty secretive about them. I think it�s some chick playing in that band that keeps him going." AJ laughed. "Who would think that Nicky here," he pointed with his thumb to the teen, "would fall in love"

"Mmm." Howie agreed.

"Anyway what were we talking about..oh yeah about how much stuff he does on his free time. I�m pretty sure that Jane has him doing some stuff too, you know like interviews and shit."

"You really think so?" His friend looked surprised.

"Yeah hell..mom says that she really keeps them going." He sighed. "Actually it�s kind of sad. Now they are playing all their cards on Aaron too. That�s why they don�t follow him on this trip."

"Ok." Howie said no more. That was an indication that he didn�t want to talk any longer

AJ on the other hand turned back his attention to Nick, wondering if the blonde heard anything and if he did what he thought about what�s being said.

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"Finally!"AJ burst out as the stewardess came with her cart. "I�m starving."

"Yes," Howie agreed, putting down his book and folding out the tray table. "It�ll be good."

The blonde stewardess smiled as she handed them one small white box each. "Here you go. Beverages will be served separately"

"OK." AJ smiled back at the good-looking stewardess. Looking at the size of her skirt he found that it was way too long for his liking. He sighed. Why did they have to look like models and wear costumes that looked like old woman's clothes? Why couldn�t they show off their long legs instead? But to tell the truth he didn�t care. He was a boobies man. Kevin was the leg man.

"Bone are you listening to what she�s saying?" Howie nudged him in his side.

"Eh..uh..what?"

"I said she was asking about Nick."

"Oh," AJ looked confused. "What about him?"

"She wanted.." Howie started but was cut off by the stewardess.

"I was just wondering if you think he would want something. She nodded at Nick.

"Sure." AJ kept smiling. Maybe she wouldn�t look too shabby in a tight top. He watched as she walked away with the cart.

"BONE!" Now Howie was really trying to get his attention. She had left him with a white meal box in his hand.

"What?" AJ said a bit annoyed. God why did D always interrupt him when he was admiring some good stuff.

"You gonna wake up Nick or not? I cant hold this one." He shook the box.

"Yeah..Yeah.." He shook his head. "God D you can be so annoying sometimes." He didn�t see his friend make a face but he guessed it was happening. Instead he turned To Nick, shaking him hard in the shoulder. "Dude wake up!"

Nick showed no sign in waking up.

He shook a bit harder next time, "I said wake up. It�s time to eat."

There was a mumble coming from the package and if AJ hadn�t been so starving and wanting to eat so bad instead of having to baby-sit his younger brother he would have been more compassionate. He shouted "I said wake up."

Nick groaned and Howie yelped. "Bone that was pretty unnecessary"

"Oh yeah..you wake him up then." AJ snapped, "'cause I�m gonna eat."

Howie stretched an arm over AJ but soon noticed that it was hopeless. Nick showed no sign of waking up. "Strange." Latino snickered. "He seems to sleep pretty heavy."

"Yeah." AJ sighed, "but you know what that means D?"

Howie looked a bit surprised at him. "No."

"It means that you get stuck holding his food while I eat." He looked at Howie who seemed to rethink his option. "So you want me to wake him up or not?"

A sigh was heard. "Ok."

"You sure? I mean I�m gonna do it MY way." There were a teasing glitz in his eyes.

"Yeah..Yeah do it." It was Howie's turn to be impatient.

"Ooookeeeey," he put his sandwich down. "but don�t say that I didn�t warn you." With that he looked at Nick one more time before hitting him hard in his side. "Dude I said wake up. YOU STINK!"

Howie winced. "Jay you didn�t have.." He started just to get a hard look from AJ. He stopped himself. Either the hit or the words woke Nick up because he sat up a confused in his seat. "What? What? How?"

His hand rubbed his side from the hit. "Why did you have to do that?" The tone was whiny when he realized what hit him.

"'Cause I said you stink." AJ spat, giving him a well practiced hard glare. "Did you fart man?"

"Uh..wha..what?" Nick looked at his friend. Then as the words sank into his mind he said in a defense tone. "NOO..Noo I did not." He added. "Why do I always have to be the one that farts?"

"'Cause it usually is you." AJ explained with a grin.

Nick didn�t look so amused. Stretching his body over AJ he said to Howie, "You know that I didn�t do it. Tell him."

Howie smiled and AJ grinned even wider. This was fun.

"Tell him!" Nick was starting to sound whiny and mad, ready to hit both Howie and AJ. "Tell him D." Now he was pleading.

The words and/or the puppy dog look got the Latino as he said with a sigh. "No Nicky you did not. Bone is just pulling your leg." Turning to AJ he said with a sigh. "Knock it off Bone."

The rebel glared at his friend but said nothing. Nick however did.

"Why do you always have to be so mean?" He looked at them accusingly while rubbing his sore side.

"It�s fun." It was true. Teasing and joking with Nick was a favorite pleasure that the guys never ceased a chance to do. At least to a point when the teen wasn�t hurt.

With a sigh AJ dug into his sandwich again while Howie stretched the white box over to the teen, "Here you go," he said.

Nick who seemed to have recovered from being so brutally awaken said a bit suspicious, "What�s that?" He sank back to his seat.

"Dinner."

"FOOD..Now eat!" AJ wasn�t as gentle as his older friend.

Nick scrunched his nose. "Not hungry." He looked away quickly, turning his attention out to the window.

"Not hungry?" The word was said loudly and in unison.

"No." Nick shook his head. "I don�t want any."

The comment had both of the men surprised. AJ was the first to comment. "Hell Kaos you eat just about anything? Are you sick or what?" He rose a hand to feel the teens forehead.

"Nooo." The blonde sounded offended, shrugging away from his friends hand. "I Don�t wanna eat anything!

"Nick you don�t feel well?" Now it was Howie's turn to be in a comfort mood.

"I didn�t say that." Nick knew he sounded a bit whiny. "I said I wasn�t hungry. There�s a difference."

"Oh yeah?" AJ looked up, chewing on a piece of bread with open mouth.

"God Bone," the blonde scrunched his nose again "Please shut your mouth. You look gross." He pointed at his friend's open mouth.

"Oh really." AJ chewed even bigger, showing the contents in his mouth. "You don�t seem to think that when you do that to us." The young man paused. "After a night out."

"That�s different!" Nick defended himself, looking a bit green around his gills.

"Different?"

"Yeah you gotta have something to pay back for not taking me with you." Nick looked dead serious.

AJ stopped chewing for a minute. "That�s just because your too young to go into a club."

"Oh yeah!" Nick looked annoyed. "Like you�re so much older than me!"

"I�m eighteen Nick." The older guy made it sound like there were years of age difference and that the teen beside him was just a small squirt.

"So?"

"Ok stop it!" Howie was getting fed up with the arguments. "I�m trying to eat here guys so.." he swallowed his bite down, "so chill out."

"Yeah kid chill out." AJ repeated still chewing with his mouth open. This time he was making sure that all of the contents in his mouth could be seen. Totally grossing out both of his friends.

"Ewwww." Nick looked positively disgusted. "That�s really gross!"

"Don�t look then." 'Man it was fun to tease the kid,' AJ thought noticing how Nick quickly changed his color from pale to green.

Howie suddenly had enough. "Stop it!" he said firmly. "Now eat up your food." He looked at them. "Both of you." The Latino was doing his best to take charge of the two friends, with various results.

"Ok." AJ sighed. Even if he loved teasing Nick there were limits to that too. Especially when the teen looked like he was going to barf any second. A hint of guilt ran through him. Looking at the teen that intensely stared out of the window he said. "Sorry Kaos."

"It�s Ok." Nick kept staring out.

Howie looked approvingly to him. If it was something D liked it was when you apologized if you�d acted like an ass.

AJ shrugged. The food was pretty good and he had no idea how Nick could miss out on such a great meal. He most be more exhausted than he let on. When they had eaten in silence for a while, all but Nick who still looked like he was fixating on the window, he asked, "Hey dude if you are not gonna eat you can at least give me your box 'cause this is damned good."

"JAY!" Howie didn�t like when he cussed. Bad publicity.

Nick looked up for the first time since AJ had been grossing out. To his dismay AJ noticed his eyes were a bit watery. "Fuck," he added.

"You can have it," Nick stated, handing him the box like it was poisonous "I don�t want it."

"Ok." AJ didn�t press on. He could see that the teen wasn�t up to par and sometimes it was better to leave things alone. It didn�t get so messy that way.

Once he�d eaten up his two part breakfast, his and Nick's, he looked at the kid again just to noticed that he�d fallen asleep again. With a frown he turned to Howie who was sipping on his coffee. "Man look at him," he gestured with his hand towards the sleeping teen. "He�s asleep again."

Howie nodded. "Most be really exhausted. Poor fella."

"Yeah maybe it has something to do with him being on a plane you know." AJ did his best to shrug the thought away that there could be something more to his friend. Something that meets the eye.

"Yes." Howie agreed. "Maybe he took a dose of Dramamine and is suffering the side effects. You know Nicky get airsick sometimes."

AJ glared at his buddy. Was he stupid or what? If he knew such a thing? Man he had to throw away a pair of his favorite pants because of the kid's gastronomical display when they were flying in a small plane in Asia.

"Mmmm." He hoped Howie was right. That it wasn�t something more to the situation....

Howie Dorough was a reader. Every chance when he had a break and he would try to sit down and read a few pages. Mostly thrillers. Like in this case Tom Clancy. He�d been wrapped up in the new novel that he�d bought at the airport for most of the flight. It was a great way to pass time.

With a sigh he looked at his watch. This whole flight had felt like an eternity. Maybe it was because they had just gotten off tour, maybe it was because the company wasn�t too cheerful. He didn�t know but he was getting tired and his ass hurt.

Stretching his limbs like a cat he looked at his two friends that were dozing off next to him. He was a restless character and the cramped up seat didn�t do much for him to relax. The rebel had a habit of talking when they were flying, but this time he had been pretty silent. Maybe it had something to do with the cold they all seemed to have caught? Howie didn�t know. All he did know was it felt great that his friend had finally fallen asleep.

Nick was another story.

He�d been asleep on and off for most of the flight, which puzzled Howie. Ok, he knew that the teen could be something of a sleeper and usually tried to get a shut eye or two while being on the plane, but this was something out of the extraordinary even for him.

Howie ran a hand across his face in a tired gesture. Not that he blamed him. He was just as beat and the day had barely begun.

As always the guys had to look forward to another day, filled with a packed schedule. Within an hour they would start their in-flight towards Quebec and Johnny had told them that a famous reporter named Sonya would meet them up at the airport. Then they would be whisked off to do an interview for a TV show then there would be a promotional dinner in the evening. By the looks of it, it didn�t look like there would be any free time at all. It was just pure luck that they didn�t have to do a concert that evening too. That would happen tomorrow night as well as some more interviews and promo stuff. The day after, they were scheduled to head off to Halifax in Nova Scotia close by the Atlantic sea. Here they would be the main attraction for a winter festival. After that it was back to Montreal and then Toronto, Calgary just to end the tour in Vancouver one and a half weeks later. There were lots of concerts and other promo activites such as interviews for the press, tv shows and so on.

To say that the schedule wasn�t packed would be an understatement.

Oh he couldn�t forget about all of those meet and greets as well as after parties that they were scheduled to attend, even if they were so tired and beat that sleep was the only thing that would attract them.

There were days when Howie was so tired that he couldn�t stand up straight. Yet he tried, as well as the other guys, to cope with it all and usually the exhausted feeling he felt went away when he met the fans. Like the others it was them he lived for. The fans and music.

"D can you move your legs? Please?"

Glancing up he found Nick standing next to him, trying to move past both him and AJ to get out to the aisle. He looked a bit rumpled in his white hooded sweatshirt jacket and blue jeans. Standing there with his hands in his pockets he seemed a bit chilled and his blonde hair was standing up in all directions. The dark bags under his eyes told that even if he�d been sleeping most of the flight he wasn�t rested at all. The pale appearance revealed that he wasn�t feeling too hot. Howie didn�t think much of that because Nick often looked like that when he was up in plane.

There was a small string of drool on his right cheek.

"Sure." Howie moved his legs so Nick could pass.

"Thanks." Nick spared no moment to move on and as he passed Howie's cramped space the older man stopped him.

"Wait!"

"What?" Nick stopped, a bit confused.

"You," Howie pointed to his right cheek, "you have some kind of drool there or something. You know on your cheek."

"Oh!" Nick blushed instantly before quickly wiping the saliva off with the back of his hand. "Gee Thanks," he whispered silently before moving forward again.

"No prob." Howie smiled. He liked this kid even if he had a habit of getting on everybody's nerves sometimes. And he did want to spare Nick the embarrassment of walking around in the cabin with drool on his face.

Nick groaned slightly as the plane jerked from sudden turbulence. He steadied himself against the armrest.

"You Ok man?" Howie's eyes clouded with worry.

"Ye..yes." The teen did his best to stand straighter. "It�s just the turbulence." He smiled palely, "You know...me and planes." There was a red tint on his cheeks from embarrassment again.

"Yeah. I know" Howie smiled kindly back, waiting for something more to be said.

"Well..I..I gotta go to the bathroom," Nick continued a bit fidgety. "I�ll be right back." With that he walked quickly down the aisle.

Howie nodded, biting his lip. There was something about Nick's posture. Something that he couldn�t put his finger on, but whatever it was it disturbed him. Maybe it was the flying..maybe it was something else. He sighed deeply. Whatever it was he hoped it wouldn�t interfere with their tight schedule.

Howie most have dozed off for a few minutes when he felt a hand on his shoulder. "Nick?" His eyes snapped open with a sudden jerk

"No. Johnny."

Turning his head to his side he noticed their dark skinned manager standing there. "Just wanted to make sure that you guys were ok."

Howie swallowed. "Um yeah we�re pretty fine."

"Ok." The tall man looked at AJ, gesturing with a nod. "He�s ok?"

"Ye..yes." Shit his voice had gone hoarse in just a few minutes. He had to be more tired than he first thought. "Yup just asleep. Snoring" Howie smiled

"Good." Johnny snickered back. "You guys need all the rest you can get. This schedule is gonna be pretty tight." Then he noticed the empty seat next to the window. "Where�s Kaos?"

"Uh..Um.. bathroom."

Johnny sighed. "Is he motion sick?"

"Nah..don�t think so." Howie thought for a while. "He�s been sleeping most of the time."

"Mhm." The black manager paid no further attention to what was being said, instead he told them. "The reporter that is coming to talk to you, Sonia Benzara wants you to wait in the plane for her."

"Who�s that?" Howie frowned.

"No idea. Beats me." Johnny shrugged his shoulders. "According to Lou she�s some kind of hot shot. A real star with her own TV show and all." He twitched a knot in his neck. "Anyway she will take you to the hotel where you are gonna get interviewed and after that its straight to do a TV show. He paused. "We�re gonna meet up Kevin and Brian there too."

"Sounds good to me. I�ll tell the others"

"Good," Johnny smiled, patting Howie on his shoulder. "You try and get some rest too, 'cause like I said earlier we don�t know when the next time we�ll be able to sit down will be."

"Sure." Howie grinned back. He liked this manager. Johnny Wright was known for being a hardass but to him he�d always been good. He knew that Nick could have his indifference's, as well as Brian but for the most part the manager was ok. Lou was something else. Ok personally Howie never had any problems with him but there was something untrusting, false, about Mr. Pearlman's way to handle business. He was happy that the manager wasn�t on this flight.

"Ok we�ll see ya in a few." With that Johnny moved further down the aisle, to sit on the business seat that Lou had booked for him.

Stretching his limbs again Howie decided that he was tired of sitting and needed to get up and go for a walk. Maybe to the bathroom to make sure that Nick hadn�t drowned or anything. He didn�t have time to do that because when he was about to rise from his seat there was a "You don�t have to do that. I think I�ll manage."

Nick was back.

"Oh it wasn�t for that. I was just thinking of going.." He stopped himself when he saw his friend rub his temples in small circles. "You alright man?" There was genuine concern in his voice.

"Just a small headache." Nick smiled palely as if trying to convince him that it was nothing to pay attention about. "I think I maybe slept too much."

"Maybe." Howie dug in his backpack. "You want something for it? I think I have some aspirin somewhere.." He searched further.

"Nah that�s Ok man." Nick shook his head. "Thanks anyway."

"You sure? Maybe you should..." The next sentence was drowned out by a loud voice in the speakers.

"Ladies and Gentlemen we�re about to make our descent to Quebec and Jean Lesac Airport. The time to landing will approximately be twenty minutes. May we please remind you to fasten your seat belts and..."

He didn�t pay attention to the rest of the words since Nick got something nervous in his eyes and his complexion got suddenly a bit gray. "I gotta get in there," he mumbled as he tried to move as fast as he could towards his seat, without waking AJ up.

It didn�t succeed very well since the rebel opened his eyes. "What�s the commotion all about?"

"Eh..uh..Nothing. Nicky is just getting back to his seat."

"'K." AJ didn�t sound too pleased. Turning to the teen he snarled, "Next time make sure that you don�t step on my foot!"

Nick, who was now sitting down, snapped his seat belt on and then apologized in a nervous tone, "Sorry Jay." He gripped his armrest tight, trying to steal himself for the landing to come.

Howie felt sorry for him. Take off and landing had always been Nick's biggest fear and everytime he did his best not to get into a full blown panic. To comfort the kid he said with a calm voice "Relax buddy. Relax and everything will be just fine."

He was talking to deaf ears since Nick was too preoccupied with closing his eyes tightly and murmuring the mantra that he did everytime. "This will be fine. This will be fine."

AJ wasn�t as concerned. "You gonna barf, man?"

"No!"

Nick looked at him a bit intimidated and Howie shot him a glare of disapproval. If there was one thing his friend didn�t need to be reminded off it was something like that.

"What?" AJ�s tone was whiny and hoarse. When Howie just shook his head he continued a bit annoyed. "Dude. Chill man. I was just asking. No crime in that, is there?"

Howie sighed. He liked AJ too but the young man could get on his nerves just as much as Nick, sometimes more. He was way to blunt with stuff and this could sometimes lead him to be a bit harsh. "No I guess not." Sometimes it was better to surrender. Luckily the landing went without a hitch and soon they were touching Canadian ground getting ready to tackle the world and with that; the Canadians ************************************************************************ ************************************

Nick ran a hand over his face. He was so very tired. Much more then he let on to the guys. It felt good that the flight was finally over and now he longed to be on firm ground again. He�d been in luck not to be sick on this trip which was always something, especially since he had a start of a headache building up. The week they had off had been pretty hectic. He�d tried to make up all the time he was away to everyone. This included everything from his family, including siblings, friends and the band he had. Funky Chickens.

His mother had some stuff for him to do too, like an interview or two and also he tried to have some time to go on the ocean. Nick loved the ocean and the beach and whenever he had the time he would go there. Just to chill out. Unfortunately there was very little time for this and a week travels fast. He�d also suffered the obligatory cold and a bit of a stomach flu when he�d come home as well as jetlag so that left him with very few days to do what he wanted to do.

He felt excited about coming to Canada, but also a bit tired. It was fun being with the guys. They were like his brothers and he�d missed them when they weren�t around. Especially Brian and a bit AJ. He liked hanging around with D and Kevin too but they were so much older and he didn�t have as much fun with them. Even if AJ had a habit of bugging him he was still cool to be with and Nick had to admit that he kind of looked up to the rebel. But also to Brian.

Brian was his best friend. It was he who made him laugh, listened when he had something on his mind, spent time with him instead of going out clubbing. Brian treated him like an equal..at least to some degree. They were called Frick and Frack. At first it had merely been a joke but then they took it as a trade mark. Frick and Frack. Forever.

Nick smiled. And it wasn�t just from his memory of good times with Brian. It was also because they had just touched the ground and they were now waiting for that reporter to show up.

"It sure looks cloudy and cold out there." Howie was looking outside the small plane window. "Brrr."

"Yeah man." AJ nodded. "It�s a good thing mom packed this jacket." He took out a thick jacket from the overhead compartment. Looking at Nick he asked, "Dude you�re just gonna wear that?" He pointed to Nick's sweatshirt jacket.

"Mmmm." There was nothing more to say. The sad reality was that his mom had been too busy to pack down his thick jacket and since he�d been too beat yesterday and fallen asleep pretty early he hadn�t packed it either. This left him with nothing on but the hooded sweatshirt and by the look of it, it was way too cold.

"You need to get on something warmer." Howie stated. "Hold on." He opened his bag. "I�ll see if I can find something."

"No." Nick shook his head. A bit embarrassed. "You don�t have to do that. I�m fine."

"But.." Howie started.."but it�s no problem."

"I said thanks but No."

"Ok, but let me know if you need some warmer clothes." Sweet D was always being so helpful.

"God D you bug me!" the teen snapped, surprising them all. Suddenly he�d felt so fed up with everyone showing concern for him or his well being. It wasn�t like he didn�t like that they cared, no it was more as if he felt like a baby when they acted like that. And he was no baby. He was sixteen and he could pretty much take care of himself.

He�d always had and always would.

"I gotta take a leak." AJ suddenly announced, opening the small bathroom door in the back.

Howie looked disgusted."Gee man..thanks but I didn�t need to hear that."

"You�re much too sensitive D," the younger man snickered before closing the door behind him.

Meanwhile the guys were waiting patiently for that "hot star" as Johnny, had put it, to show up. They were already running a bit late in schedule and couldn�t afford any set backs.

"I�m gonna see where she is." Johnny announced before walking off the plane.

"Ok."

To tell the truth Nick didn�t think that the hold up in time was all that bad. The headache he was nursing was slowly rising a notch and now he desperately wished he hadn�t been so fast in declining the aspirin Howie had offered. He was just standing up and about to ask his friend for a pill when a high female's voice could be heard in the plane.

"Hiiii.Hiii." A woman with long brown hair all dressed in white came into the plane. Saying hello. She looked about to be his own moms age. "Hi to you all!" She smiled widely as she walked up to Nick.

Noticing the reporter as well as the camera crew the teens first reaction was to hide away from it all. There was no way that he wanted people to see how gray and miserable he looked. It would be way too embarrassing and it would also ruin his poster boy look. He ducked quickly behind the seat.

"Hi are you all waiting for me? Hi and welcome to Quebec." She laughed while she walked down the aisle towards Nick, a mic in her hand. "Now don�t you hide from me Nick!" she announced for the whole world to hear.

He felt like he was about to die. Just die.

"Hi Nick." She was still as cheerful as she�d been. "How are ya?" The mic was in his face.

Smiling, he started to say that he was fine..when he caught himself. Man that would be way too boring. His mother as well as his acting trainer's words ringing in his ears, he ducked even further then said "I�m scaaared."

She laughed loudly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Don�t you worry Nick. There�s plenty of gals out there waiting to protect you." She laughed again, rubbing his shoulders in that comforting way that his mom used to do, "Nice to have you here." She continued down the aisle before he had a chance to say anything more. Spotting Howie who was standing in the back. Waiting. Looking.

"Oh Hi it�s Hoooowieeee," she squealed on as she walked quickly towards his friend.

Meanwhile Nick saw an escape and quickly left his seat, waiting for the rest of the guys to come. The sudden move made his head hurt even more and for a moment he felt dizzy. Steadying himself at the top of the seats he made it towards Johnny who looked at him with a frown.

"Kid the plane ain�t moving anymore." He was trying to make a joke.

"I know." Nick was way too tired and worn out to snap back a smartass remark. Like he often used to do.

This had the black manager frowning deeper. "You ok kiddo?" He put a hand on the teen's shoulder, squeezing it gently.

"Mmm..sure..just tired you know," he excused himself. "It�s been a long flight you know."

"I guess it has." Johnny didn�t look too convinced that it was all that it was.

Afraid that the manager would press on why he was acting so still and quiet he quickly said, "I�m a bit hungry too."

The older man looked searchingly at him. "You are?" His words were slow, like he didn�t believe him. When Nick nodded a response back he continued, "Well, I�ve been told that we�re going to get lunch once we arrive at the hotel" He set his eyes into Nicks. "Sounds good doesn�t it?"

'Swell' Nick thought but said with a false forced happiness. "Yeah that�ll be good. I�m staaarviing." He made a big point showing the manager just HOW hungry he felt.

"Good!" Johnny said, still looking like he didn�t believe a word. "Howie said that you were skipping breakfast. How come?"

Tattler! "Eh..uh,,he did? Did he?" Nick was stalling.

"Yes?" The manager was expecting an answer, and not a lie this time.

"Well.." Nick licked his lips while searching for words. "I slept and I was..wasn�t really that hungry." Noticing the managers displeased look he quickly added, "Then. Now is another story."

God how he hoped that the guys would be done and over talking with that woman so they could get off this plane. It was tiresome standing up, waiting and Johnny bugging him about small details didn�t help much either. As if his wish had been heard he saw the three of them walking towards him, the lady chatting all the time. Couldn�t she see that they were all dead tired? Nick was doing his best to keep his posture up and he could see that his friends were doing the same.

"Oh wooow this is going to be fun. NOT," Nick mumbled silently, rolling his eyes. Luckily no one saw his gesture and he could get away with it. At least this time.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 3
It was a cold and snowy Quebec that greeted them when they stepped out of the plane. The wind was blowing and it was barely above freezing.

The Canadian reporter Sonia was chatting along with them as they prepared to walk down the stairs of the airplane. "Where are the rest of the guys?"

Howie, who was the first to step down the plane was too busy holding the rail to answer and instantly she repeated her question several times to him. "Where are the other guys? Why aren�t they here?"

"Huh?" He looked up.

Another repeat. "I said where are the other guys? Are they taking a different plane?" To the Latino’s surprise her voice hadn�t lost any of the enthusiasm that she showed earlier in the plane and she continued talking while he was thinking of something to say.

"Um...They went on another plane. From Lexington, Kentucky and they will arrive a bit later." He was surprised that Johnny hadn�t filled her in on the details.

"Oh! They went home for the vacation? The break you guys had?"

"Yup." Howie felt it was best to take the lead since both of AJ and Nick didn�t seem to have been able to get their butts off plane yet. Walking along with the reporter, who was talking constantly, he tried to answer all of her questions in a polite manner.

"There are girls, fans, that has been coming to greet you. All over from the continent." She smiled.

"Oh yeah?" Howie was trying to follow her fast pace, dragging his heavy bag along with him.

"Yes and these girls, these girls have been waiting for you since one o’clock last night. Trying to get a good look at you."

"Really?" Howie felt amazed. "Wow that is fantastic." he smiled widely towards the camera. "It�s great to have such wonderful fans."

The truth was that in his world he could never understand how girls could wait for them since one am last night. After all they were just a bunch of ordinary guys that were singing and dancing. He�d a hard time understanding all the hysteria that seemed to follow them everywhere they went these days. Everywhere but in the United States. A couple of years back they had been pretty unknown and no one had known their name but then things had changed drastically after they had topped the charts in Europe and now the situation was totally different.

Screaming fans, security and media followed them wherever they walked. This was kind of exciting but also in a way a bit taxing and by the look of it Canada wasn�t much different from Europe. The place was packed with screaming girls.

Several steps behind were AJ and Nick.

Nick was walking down the stairs, carefully and slowly, almost as if he was afraid to trip and fall. He was also holding onto the handrail with both hands which slowed down the pace a bit, making AJ irritated in the process.

"Dude can you walk a bit faster?" he nagged. "In this pace we won�t reach the building before midnight and I�m already freezing my ass off." He rubbed his arms. "Shit this is cold!"

Ignoring the comment the teen did his best to keep his balance and no snide remarks were returned.

With a frown AJ thought that this wasn�t like the blonde at all. Usually Nick would get off a plane, all bouncy and hyper, especially if there was a camera in sight. He would jump on their backs, hugging them from behind, making an act of it all. Today however he acted like an old man, dragging his feet along.

Something was definitely off!

Johnny most have thought so too since he kept walking beside Nick, watching him as if to see if the teen would pass out or not. Even though AJ felt concern over his friend, at least a tiny bit, he still didn�t want to freeze his ass off in the cold weather. This lead to that he hasten his pace, walking quickly into the airport.

'This is freezing' Nick thought as he dragged his feet along. The backpack he was carrying felt like lead on his shoulder and the headache he�d gotten an hour or so ago did anything but let up. Man how he wished he hadn�t refused the aspirin Howie wanted to give him earlier. The bright light hurt his eyes and he had to squint to see where he was going.

"Excuse me." Nick felt someone tug at his sweatshirt and turning around he found one of the ground staff standing there with a nervous smile on his face. "Excuse me but do you think I can have an autograph." He seemed a bit embarrassed. "You know for my daughter?"

"Sure." Nick stopped "You have anything to write on?"

"Yes!" The man had come prepared and he handed him a napkin as well as a marker. "There you go."

"Oh Ok." Nick started to scribble down his name.

"My daughter really likes your music," the man went on.

"That�s nice." He knew that his voice most have sounded dull and unenthusiastic, yet he coudn�t help himself because that was the way he was feeling. Tired and bored.

"There ya go," he handed the napkin back with a smile. "Whose pen was it?" Now several people from the airport staff had gathered around him.

"Mine." Another man said, taking the pen from him.

"Ok." Nick looked at him. "You want one too? I mean an autograph?" Man did he feel stupid standing there in the cold, signing his name while the others were inside waiting for him.

"I do Ni.." the man with the pen started just to get hit on his back by his friend. "Sure Mcgidden take one too. You know for your children."

"Oh Ok." The McGidden person handed him another napkin and Nick wrote his name as if in autopilot. His fingers were stiff from the cold and it was hard to write without having any gloves on.

"Kind of cold for a Florida boy like you huh?"

"A bit." He was trying to be as polite as possible while doing his best to concentrate on writing his name. For some strange reason the letters seemed to blur and he had a hard time thinking straight.

Crap! The letter C in Carter, that one he�d practiced so many times, looked kind of crooked and for a short second he debated whether or not he should re-write his name. A call from his manager made his decision easy.

"Carter we gotta be going! Come on!"

"Sorry. I hafta go," he mumbled, handing back the napkin. "Oh and say hi to your daughter for me."

"Sure and have a great time over here."

"I will," Nick called back as he started to jog towards Johnny who was standing by the entrance, looking anything but pleased. In the background he could hear the men talking about him and the words "great" and "nice one" was being mentioned. This left him smiling.

"Nick we�re getting behind. You have to come now. That reporter wants you inside." Johnny pushed him forward in the entrance and once he got inside he heard the worst of noises that he�d ever heard.

There were girls, hundreds of girls in all ages. mostly teens, screaming their names. They were all trying to get the attention from the boys and several of the girls were crying hysterically.

He�d never thought that the reception would be this big. That there would be almost like a riot. There were security men all over the place and the girls were standing behind glass doors. It was totally jammed. And he had to get through that crowd.

"Niiiiiiickkk, come on huuurryyy." The reporter had spotted him. She waved with her hand for him to come and instantly he obeyed. She was irritating, this whole situation was frustrating but he had a job to do. And he did it.

"Nick oh Nick can you come here? Can I touch you?"

"NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK"

"Can I have a hug?"

“Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccckkkkkkk!!"

"I loooooooveeee youuuuuuu! Niiiiiiiiiiiiccccccccck"

He felt scared. This was getting a bit too much.

"What�s the word for Hi?" Howie asked, standing next to the reporter, waving to all of the fans.

"Bonjour..the word is bonjour." Sonia seemed to be very pleased with Howie who was asking questions about Quebec and Canada. Spotting Nick walking she shouted once again, waving to him "Come on hurry up." As the teen came closer she said, "Remember Bonjour." She seemed a bit annoyed.

"Huh?" The sixteen old had no idea what this woman was talking about. Howie jabbed him at his side, urging him to pay attention.

"Bonjour. That is hello."

"Oh..Ok." He grinned to the fans and then shouted. "Bonjour-a."

"Bonjour-a," the reported repeated with a smile.

This had the fans get even wilder, screaming so loud that Nick was sure that his ears would pop any second. It was totally crazy.

Nick’s reaction was to giggle, giggle so much that he had a hard time controlling himself. This could be an reaction from being overly tired but everything had been pretty much a shock and now it was his way of dealing with the situation. The pressure.

Howie patted him friendly on his back while AJ snarled "Quit it!"

Nick was about to comment when a young girl walked up to them, holding flowers in her hand. "This is for you." She said in broken English. AJ was the one who accepted the flowers and then returned it with a hug.

The girl was in heaven. She was giddy with happiness.

"These are the girls that will come on the show for you," the reporter smiled but the boys looked like question marks.

"What show?" AJ whispered to Howie who shrugged his shoulders and then looked at Johnny.

Johnny looked just as surprised. He opened his mouth to ask, "What do.." when the reporter cut him off.

"Oh you haven�t heard?" She looked genuinly surprised. "First there will be a short show where you do some things," she smiled but the guys did not.

'What things?' Nick’s mind went into over drive. Even if he loved playing sports and stuff he still didn�t feel like such an activity. The headache was getting worse all the time and now he was experiencing a sore neck too. 'Wierd,' he thought. ' I must have slept wrong on the plane.'

"And then you will all do a small concert and after this..."

"A concert?" Howie cut her off, still smiling to the fans.

"Yes." She looked surprised. "Didn�t my management mention this?" Before either of them had a chance to comment she continued, "And after the show there will be a big meet and greet where you sign autographs and take pictures." Sonia smiled to them all.

Johnny looked a bit confused like he was trying to figure out if this was in the contract.

"Then of course there is the interview and then we will do one on one interviews with all of you."

This was alot more than they had been told to do in the contract, at least the one the guys had signed. It would also mean that they would be very busy the whole afternoon, not to mention the dinner at the end. Usually things like this didn�t bother them but they were all tired and jet lagged and tomorrows schedule was just as packed as todays.

AJ got a feeling that they were getting screwed over and he wished Kevin had been there to help them out. Johnny was good, but he was also a businessman and when he smelled money he was all go! It didn�t matter if the guys were fit or not. Business meant business and you had to be prepared to work hard.

None of the guys felt fit to object since they didn�t know if the contract had been changed or not. It was also not the right time to say anything surrounded by fans and a camera team. Looking at Johnny they tried to get some sort of response but he just shrugged back and gave them the look that told them to shut up and follow their obligations.

Howie as always was the first to accept it. "That sounds really really nice," he smiled towards the camera and the reporter. "It�s so wonderful to be here in Canada and meet such a great fans."

'Kissing ass much?' Nick thought but he said nothing.

AJ filled in too. "Yes D is right. It�s great to be here and we love you all."

A loud scream could be heard all over the airport. The fans was in ecstasy.

"Yes," the reporter said with a large smile. "It will be wonderful for you to meet the Canadian fans and discover how warm and nice we all are."

Nick still hadn�t said anything and as he was passing through the crowd one girl pulled at his sweatshirt. He turned around to see a young teen standing there, looking a bit shy. "Excuse me Nick," she said on her broken English. "Do you think that I can have a picture with you?" As to make a point what she meant she waved with her pocket camera.

"Yeah. Sure." Nick was never the person who let someone down.

With a delighted squeal she handed her camera over to her friend and Nick took in the position, holding a hand around her shoulder and then smiling the famous Backstreet smile. Afterwards he was rewarded with a large hug. "Thank you..Thank you so very very much." The girl was in heaven.

Nick smiled back. This was one of the best things with touring and going public. It was the fans and all the love that they shared.

"Can I have a picture too?" Another girl came forward to him and he was about to take in his photo postition when a security gut barged in.

"It�s time to go. The van is waiting!"

Nick could feel his arm getting pulled by the security guy and he felt bad for having to say to the young girl that he couldn�t stay. "Sorry," he whispered honestly. "I gotta go. Can�t stay."

There were sounds of disappointment coming from the girl but also from the rest of the fans. He held out his hands as to show that he had no control over the situation as he was being whisked away quickly and as he as well as the rest of the guys walked away he waved, blowing kisses to the fans that went simply wild and crazy.

"This way." The security man urged them as they were being lead through a backdoor. Nick felt like he was walking in slowmotion. This felt all so unreal, almost surreal and the impression he got from today were so many that he had a hard time digesting it.

Walking outside to the waiting van they found that it was just as many fans standing outside, waiting for them and they had to be whisked quickly into the car. Even if Nick felt bad for not being able to stop and talk with the fans, giving out autographs and hugs, it still felt good coming into the warmth of the car. Getting inside he found himself sitting between Howie and AJ since that was how the reporter wanted it for the interview in the car.

The Backstreet Baby in the middle.


**************************************************
The drive from the airport and to the hotel felt like an eternity. AJ, was just as bored as he�d been on the flight and all he wished for was that they would arrive soon and also that they would get a few hours of rest.

But that was just not going to happen.

Sonia, the reporter, was asking them all kinds of questions and Howie had taken up the task to answer them, at least most of them. AJ filled in once or twice but mostly it was sweet D that got the stage to himself. AJ as well as Howie had drawn the lucky stick and they were sitting by the windows while Nick was stuck in the cramped up seat in the middle.

Catching a quick eye at his younger buddy he noticed that the teen looked like he was ready to doze off. His eyelids seemed heavy and he had a hard time keeping his eyes open. AJ watched in amusement for a while, noticing how Nick would battle with sleep only to doze off and then the next wake up, snapping his eyes open. As if that wasn�t enough Nick seemed unusually fidgety and he kept moving his legs all the time. He got the impression that this was an attempt to stay awake.

But what had AJ puzzled was the uncharacteristic silence, where he only answered with one word like "Umm", "No." and "Yes." This was very unusual for his friend who often talked in long sentences about all kind of topics. His posture was also slightly hunched in a way that told him that he was either in some kind of pain, very cold or too tired to sit up straight.He also had his hands in the sweatshirt pockets like he was warming them. A blank exression was set on his face and he looked like he was spacing off.

AJ cared about Nick, still he didn�t want to ask how he was doing. It was way too uncool and would destroy a bit of his attitude. It was better to pretend that you didn�t care then show love and then in the secret make sure that your "brother" was doing fine. If he let down his guard it could happend that the teen wouldn�t take his snappy harsh remarks seriously . That would be an defeat. Little brothers needed to be taught who was in control of them, besides the rest of the guys were on his case so why couldn�t he be on Nick’s?

The rebel had his own ways to look after his bro. He asked Howie to ask and that way he found out if something was bothering the teen. It might be stupid but it was his way too keep his posture and he wouldn�t change it any time soon. It was Howie that told him that Nick was nursing a "small" headache.

Nothing more, nothing less.

"So Ajeeeeeee," the reporter asked with her annoying French accent. "There is something I would like to ask you."

"Ok.Shoot."

"Is it true that you have a girlfriend?"

Looking up AJ tried to bid time. "Ugh sorry. What was the question?"

Howie rolled his eyes while Nick said nothing, not even looking at his direction.

"There is a rumor that you�re dating a girl called Molly. Is this true?"

'Nosy much' the rebel thought annoyed. He smiled. "No I�m single." He paused. "We�re all single."

Howie gave him the look that said "Don�t go there". This was a white lie since three out of five Backstreet boys had girlfriends. Kevin was dating a girl named Kristin whom he met when he worked over at Disney. They had been dating on and off for several years and right now it was on.

Brian dated his girlfriend Samantha and AJ himself was dating Johnny Wright’s daughter Melissa. It was only Nick and Howie who were the single ones.

The reason for the "white lie" was that the managment thought it would be bad for the business if it came out that their "Posterboys" actually had girlfriends. This could upset the fans too much and therefore they had promised to act like they were all single. Sometimes this wasn�t easy, esepecially those times when a teenie caught them holding their girlfriends hand and then the media got a wift of it too. It would be bad publicity so therefore NO STEADY GIRLFRIENDS!

The questions kept coming to him now and he answered them as good as possible while feeling envious that Nick got off the hook so easily. Catching another look at his friend he found that the warmth and the movement of the car must have lulled his friend to sleep since Nick was leaning against Howie’s shoulder.

"Oh how sweeeet." The reporter squeeled, taking a notice of the two Backstreet boys. Turning to the film team she continued, "You juuuuussst have to take this picturrrreeeee."

AJ waited and Howie seemed a bit embarrassed. Nick was sleeping unknown to the fact that he was being filmed. The teen would be soooo pissed when this was shown on live television. The thought of his friend’s blushing face made him grin even wider. It was fun to play that kind of prank.

When Nick smacked in his sleep, Howie had enough. He lifted his shoulder up a bit in a hopes to wake up the blonde. Nothing happend. Then he started to shake his shoulder a bit. Still nothing. "Nick..Nick," the Latino shook the arm a bit and finally a stir.

"Nick get up." Still a soft and low tone.

AJ as well as the rest of the people in the bus watched the drama with amusement.

A groan was heard and this time Howie shook even harder, "Nick get up!"

The words did it. Nick sat up with a jerk.

"Wha..what?" He looked confused around in the van. They all laughed at him. "What? what did I do?"

"You fell asleep." Howie explained.

"Oh." Nick seemed to relax a notch.

"On tv!" AJ added with a grin. "And you were drooling man. Gross!"

This was fun!

His eyeballs looked like they were going to jump out of their sockets. Nick’s eyes were all wide and a red tint of color crept into his cheeks, quickly turning his face red as a fire truck. "I did not!" He looked a bit panicked.

"Yes you did." AJ grinned even wider. Rule number one; if you were bored always tease Nick.

"Don�t you worry honey." The Sonua character said. "You looked so cuuuuuteeeeeeee and the girls will go absolutly maaaad when they see this." She chuckled.

"Yeah man," AJ laughed. "Especially the drool part."

Nick hit his friend in the stomach. Hard.

"Ouch!" AJ bent over like he was in serious pain. Rubbing his belly he looked up at Nick again and then said with a tease in his eyes. "Dude at least you can be happy that you didn�t snore." He paused, watching Nick’s color rise degree. "Like you always do," he added with a glint in his eye.

"I do NOT snore!" Nick was in no mood to be teased.

Everybody in the van laughed, everyone but Nick who seemed too pissed to say anything.

AJ sighed. Now they would have to deal with a totally pissed teen and that would be nothing to take easy upon. The blonde was known for his bad temper and mood swings and the dark color in his eyes told them that they would be in for a real treat if they didn�t stop right now.

But the rebel had no such intentions.

He opened his mouth to say something when the driver suddenly spoke. "This is fucking wild!"

Looking outside they found that the front entrance to the hotel was absolutely packed with people. Fans screaming for their attention as the white van rode up towards the entrance. Hundreds of fans were waiting and they had to shut off the street so no one would get hurt.

"This is wild,! AJ commented, plastering his face against the window, waving to the crowd. "Hi girls!" he shouted at the screaming fans.

"Yes look at them. They are crazy!" Howie waved too, just as excited as his friend.

Nick was mostly shocked. The amount of fans that had come to see them was absolutely unbelivable and he couldn�t understand that all of these girls had come to see them. He waved just as excited as the rest of the guys, blowing kisses to the screaming girls that were doing everything to get into the van.

"This is absolutly crazy!" The driver said, stopping the van."I can�t move another inch because if I do, someone might get hurt!"

Nick was the first to grip the situation. "Does this mean that we can�t get out of here?" He sounded very nervous all at once and by the look of his face he was scared too.

"It means that we have to stop the car here and then call for security and then walk through the crowd." Johnny acted fast when it came to an emergency.

"That is madness!" This time it was Howie that objected. "We will get crushed."

"Yes," AJ filled in. "The fans will run us down." He sounded just as scared as the rest of them.

Meanwhile the reporter was urging her camera men to film the screaming crowd outside. She was the only one that was getting excited now, since she smelled that this could be a real scoop and she was actually in the Backstreet van and could get first hand situation what the guys felt about it all.

More and more fans surrounded the van and soon they were stuck. Stuck in a crowd of fans...

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 4
The first reaction was flatter. It was amazing that so many fans, mostly girls, had come outside the hotel to wait for them. Now more than half an hour later the feeling of excitement was transferred to fright. It wasn�t so fun being stuck in the van anymore and as time passed on it was getting more and more clear that the fans wouldn�t move out of the way which could only lead to one soloution.

They had to run through the crowd!.

Everytime they showed their face against the car windows the girls were screaming from excitement. Some of them were down right hysterical and they were doing everything to get inside the van. For a moment they felt the car sway a bit and they got scared. What if the hundreds and hundreds of fans would actually tip the van? This was sheer horror!

"This is getting ridiculous!" Johnny stated when they had been stuck there way too long. "If this keep up we�re going to be late." Looking outside he muttered. "Where the hell is backup when you need them?"

The backup that he was referring to was the security men. Since no one had expected such a riot not one security guy or body guards had been called in for the guys rescue. Things were getting heated up inside and they had to call for the police force to step in. Someone could get seriously hurt and that was the last thing any of them wanted to happen.

"It’s about time!" Johnny muttered as he saw security starting to do their job. They were trying to form a line, which wasn�t easy since the girls were all screaming and pushing each other, trying to get closer to their idols.

The guys were too busy connecting with the fans to notice what was going on with the security. Instead they were all waving and smiling and even if they pretended to love the situation it was starting to become a bit too much, even for them. All the smiling had left them pretty sore mouths and as they started to feel both hungry and tired they all wished that this would be over soon. Fans were great but this was over the limit!

If the boys were starting to get fed up with the situation the reporter and her film crew was just the opposite. They were so excited over getting todays scoop and they kept filming both the guys as well as the fans outside. Since the camera rolled, taking in everything, the boys had to be careful what they were doing or saying. It was safest to play it cool and therefore they pretended that they really loved this situation. What more could they do? After all this was going to be shown on television and they didn�t want any bad publicity. Of any kind.

The famous Backstreet smile was plastered all over their faces.

The door opened suddenly and a large broad shouldered man came into the van. "How are you all doing in there?" he asked. They could hear the girls screaming outside, almost deafening noise.

When no one replied the man continued, "We�ve cleared off everything and made a path for you to run through."

"About time," AJ snickered. Not that he didn�t like the fans it was more that he was fed up with being cooped up in small spaces without having any chance to move his legs.

"I want you to get out one by one and.."

He was cut off by Nick mumbling nervously, "Is this really safe? I mean.." he swallowed hard. "we..we could get crushed." There was doubt in his eyes.

"This is safe." The man reassured. "Or let me put it this way. It�s as safe as it can be." He looked at the boys. "However I strongly advise against stopping or talking to anyone once you�re out there. It can endanger your life as well as theirs."

The man talked with such authorithy that they realized that this was serious. It was the first time they had been this "cornered" but then there always had to be the first of everything.

Nick flickered with his eyes, looking nervously at the crowd. To him they looked like a pack of wolves.

Noticing the younger boy’s posture, AJ put his arm around the blonde’s shoulders. "Hey Kaos!" he whispered. His friend turned his face in his direction and AJ jerked at the pale appearances his friend had. It looked like he hadn�t slept for days. "You alright?"

Nick bit his lip.

"Don�t worry," he continued. "We�ll get through this!"

This action was noticed by the reporter and she urged her camera crew once more to film them. "That�s soooo sweeet;" she squealed. "Brotherly looooveee."

Man was she annoying. AJ let go of Nick�s shoulders instantly like he�d been burned by a cigarette. If there was one thing he wanted kept to himself it was the love and affection he felt for his Backstreet brothers. It would appear to be much too gay to be aired on tv.

Nick looked at him, but said nothing. He knew how much AJ tried to be a tough guy but he also knew the soft spot that his friend had. He sighed.

"You two." Johnny pointed at them. "Quit foolin� around and listen to," the manager gestured with his thumb towards the security men, "what he has to say."

"Ok." While the guys had talked they noticed that the reporter as well as the film team had gone outside and Sonia was standing outside, interviewing fans. The guys felt actually a bit relieved since it was hard having a film team following every step they took.

"We have to move fast since the crowd is getting bigger and bigger and the fans are down right hysterical." The security man looked at each and every one of them. "Who wants to go first?"

There was a silence so deafening that you could hear a pin drop on the floor. They all hesistated, looking at each other. No one wanted to be the first since they knew that it would be a riot out there. The first and the last were the worst positions since the crowd was likely to go berserk.

"Let�s send out Nick to distract them, you know like a decoy." AJ suggested with a grin. He was doing his best to make up for his comforting gesture and tried to sound like he didn�t care much for his friend.

But the teen didn�t catch the joke. Instead he looked at them with desperation in his eyes. "I don�t wanna goooo!" The tone was loud and whiny.

This time it was Howie that put his arm around the teen. "Don�t worry Nicky. I�ll go first." He smiled. "It�s not me that�s the one they are screaming for."

This was true since the name that were mostly on the girls lips was Nick and the more they screamed the more frightened the teen felt.

"OK Howie you go first then." Johnny urged him. "You better go now so we don�t break this schedule anymore than we already have!" With that he watched as the security man opened the door and Howie jumped out just to be met with a totally ear deafening screams from the fans. They were so excited to see that a Backstreet boy finally made an entrance, even if he was taking a run for it.

"Go D, Go!" Nick crossed his fingers, hoping that his friend would make it without a hitch inside the big building.

The security man spoke into a walkie talkie. "Ok," he said when he�d talked to his men outside. "The coast is clear, the next person can go now."

Both Nick and AJ looked at each other. Bone was about to name the teen when he stopped himself. What if Nick was more scared then he let on? With a sigh he said, "You go Kaos!"

The teen looked up in surprise. This was not something he�d expected. They all knew that it was the one that would go the first and the last that would take the heat. First because the girls were all so excited from waiting so long, last since they knew that no one would come after that person and they all wanted to grab a piece of Backstreet ass.

"You mean me?"

"Yeah Nick..you."

"Really..thanks man." Nick looked genuinely happy and for a second AJ feared that he would get a hug. Not that he had anything against Nick hugs. No, but stuff like this was totally private.

AJ grinned, trying to act tough. "Now get your scrawny ass out there or I�ll change my mind."

"Ok." The teen was fast to move towards the door before his friend changed his mind. For real.

"Ok are you ready?" The security man asked, Nick who was standing by the van door.

Nick nodded.

"Ok when I count to three I will open the door and you make a move." He looked at the teen. "Understood?"

Nick nodded again. This time licking his lips nervously. He felt like a wuss but couldn�t help it. Situations like this scared the crap out of him.

"Don�t worry Nick. " Johnny noticed he was scared too and tried to calm him down.

"Ok." That was all he could say.

"Are you ready?" The security man asked. "One, Two, Threee...Goooo."

AJ watched as his friend jumped out of the van, the girls screaming loudly as they saw who was running. He could see that the security had a hard time keeping the line back and for a moment it looked like the line broke and girls started running after Nick. His heart pounded in his chest, and he didn�t calm down until the security man declared that everything was fine and Nick was back in safe again. He signaled for AJ to go and the rebel didn�t think he had leapt that fast before. A security man followed tight behind him while the girls tried to break the chain to get closer to him.

He had never felt so relieved before as he did once he was inside the hotel.


********************************************
"Helloooo guys!"Brian shouted as he came into the lounge where he�d been told that the rest of the guys were waiting for them to arrive. Kevin followed him in tow.

"Hi there." The older man patted both Howie and AJ on their backs in a friendly gesture.

"Had a safe flight?" Howie asked as Brian put his heavy bag on the floor beside him.

"Mmm-umm...slept most of the way."

"Like everyone else then." Howie smiled.

"I heard it was pretty wild outside when you arrived," Kevin said.

"Yes..the fans were going crazy." Howie patted the seat next to him. "Here come and sit down while we wait for Johnny to get us...so I can hear what you guys have been doing during the break."

"Ok." Both cousins sat down.

"Security ran us in through the backdoor."

"That�s good," Howie nodded. "Man it was wild. I thought for sure that someone would get injured."

"Yeah and Kaos nearly freaked out!"

Brian was the first to notice that they were one boy short. "Speaking of Kaos. Where is he?"

Howie and AJ looked up. Genuinely surprised. "Isn�t he here?"

"Nope."

Kevin looked at them. "You haven�t noticed that Kaos was missing? �"

"Uh..No." Both boys felt a bit bad for neglecting their friend. But Nick had been so quiet and they had been engrossed in talking about a new stereo system that Howie was getting installed in his car. The teen had showed very little interest and instead mainly sat there, staring ahead, looking like he wanted to be somewhere else.

"Sorry, we forgot about him." Howie looked a bit embarrassed.

"Yeah." AJ felt just as stupid. "He is probably somewhere around here..maybe the bathroom..maybe he went to the vending machine." The rebel shrugged his shoulders as to pretend that he didn�t care but his worried expression told them otherwise.

"You forgot about him?" Brian didn�t think he was believing what he was hearing.

"Eh..uh..sorry." Howie rose to get up and search for the kid, when Kevin stopped him.

"How can you forgot about Kaos? You didn�t even notice when he stopped talking?" There was major sarcasm in his tone.

"Eh..uh..actually he didn�t say much." AJ shrugged his shoulders as to tell them that he didn�t care that much about the teens whereabouts.

"Didn�t talk much?" Brian nearly choked on the coke he was drinking. "C’ mon it�s Nick we�re talking about here. He is NEVER silent."

"Oh yeah? well he has been today," Howie defended. "I think he is tired from the flight, tired like we all are."

AJ nodded too. "Yeah Kaos been acting kind of strange. Strange for being Kaos that is."

"Strange? In what way?" Brian stood up to leave the room, noticing this Kevin aked, "Where are you going?"

"To see if I can find Nick anywhere."

"Ok." Kevin made no move to follow his cousin. "When you find him tell him that Johnny wants us to hurry up and that we have to go to lunch."

Brian moved towards the restrooms. Opening the heavy door he peered inside, hoping that it wouldn�t look too gay for him to do something like that. To his relief he noticed that the restroom was empty and that no stalls were occupied. To be on the safe side he called out, "Niiiiccckkk, Niiiiccccckkkkk, you�re there?"

No answer.

The teen had to be at the vending machines, Brian concluded closing the door behind him. He knew how much Nick loved to eat candy bars and hopefully he would be over by one. Looking at his watch he saw that they were late already and he hoped that he hadn�t got lost or anything.

In the lobby he discovered; No Nick! 'Wierd,' Brian thought, running his hand through his hair. 'Where could that kid be?' Walking up to the reception area he asked the reception desk clerk if she�d seen someone that could fit the young boys description. Just as he suspected it came out negative.

"No." She shook her head. "I�m sorry I have not. But go and check the restaurant or the pool or ga.." She didn�t have time to continue before Brian cut her off.

"No time. Thanks anyway." He smiled to her.

"No problem and if I�ll see a young teenager fitting your description I’ll let him know that you are?" She paused.

"We�re in the Lounge and tell him to hurry up too."

"I will. Good luck." She smiled back at him as he left.

Brian sighed. He had to find Nick or Johnny and the rest of the guys would give him hell for it. They were already running a tight schedule and it didn�t help matters that one fifth of the group was missing. It was wierd that Nick had left without saying anything to the rest of the guys. If it had been someone other than Frack he�d understood but this was the guy that hated even going to the bathroom alone and would always ask someone to accompany him.

Looking outside he found that there were fans still waiting for them, hoping to catch a glance of their idols. Or even better an autograph. Upon hearing the screams outside Brian’s blood ran cold. The teen couldn�t be so stupid that he would go outside, would he?

He prayed that the teen hadn�t went out on his own and if he did he hoped that he wasn�t laying out there, mugged, but then it was much too silent for something like that. Sighing he decided that he had to get back to the lounge and talk to the others. They had to gather a search party and hopefully AJ and Howie would have a clue where he could be. If not they were in big shit!

Walking back into the lounge he was being stopped by Kevin. "There you are. Johnny told us to wait at the back entrance. We�re taking the bus to the restaurant to eat lunch. He paused. "You’d better hurry up cause we�re late."

"But we have to find Nick.." Brian got cut off.

"Nick�s back."

"He is?" The younger man looked surprised. "Where was he then?"

"In the game room."

Brian was running next to his cousin. "The game room?" Slapping his hand across his forehead he added, "Man that I didn�t think of that one."

"Yeah well the only things that matters is that wer’re all here and that we can go to the restaurant. I�m starving."

Stepping on the bus Brian found his friend sitting in a seat, looking gloomily out the window. He seemed to be half asleep.

"Heloooo there Frack." Brian smiled. All the anger and worry he�d felt before had vanished and as he walked up to him he asked, "Hey buddy, can I sit down next to you?"

"Sure." Nick moved his backpack to the floor, making room for his friend to sit down.

"Thanks man..so wass up with you?" He�d decided not to yell at Nick for leaving them after all he was back and it wasn�t like he was a five year old or anything, even if there were times when he acted like that.

"Nothing much."

Frowning Brian took a good look at his friend. His eyes were glassy in the same way that he always was when he was either dead tired or sick as a dog. He hoped for the first option. He also seemed unnaturally pale and there wasn�t that sparkle that always seemed to accompany his friend. Instead he looked mostly dull and like it was a hard task just keeping his eyes opened.

"So how was your break then?" Brian tried to make small talk.

"It was ok. Busy. Yours?" Nick wasn�t very talkative at all.

"Pretty good. I was with mom and dad and Harold. Seen Samantha and we went horse backriding." He smiled, hoping to get the teens attention.

"Ok." The answer was short.

"You ever done horse backriding?" Brian hadn�t given up the attempt of getting a conversation out of the kid.

"I don’t know." Nick stared out of the window, looking at the people out on the sidewalks. It was a rather busy city.

Sighing Brian said, "You�re awful quiet. Is something the matter with you?"

"No."

"You sure? The guys said you slept the whole flight." The older boy pressed on.

"Yes I�m fine and yes I slept most of the flight." He turned to look at his friend. "I just don�t feel like talking. Ok?"

"Uh..Yeah I guess so."

"Good now let me be!"

The Kentuckian felt puzzled over the teens sudden hostility. This was not like the friend he knew. Nick could be rather moody but then he usually had a reason for being like that. This time he was just quiet and drawn to himself.

"Any reason why you don�t feel like talking?" Brian asked putting his hand on the teens arm when Nick had stared out of the window long enough. "Did I do anything?

"No B." There were a deep sigh.

"Any reason for this? I mean you being so tired?"

"No." A headshake.

"You want me to leave you alone?"

This time a nod.

"I won’t press on any further but Nick," Brian squeezed his friend’s arm gently. "You’ll have to tell me if there is something that�s bothering you." He looked the teen in his eyes. "Right?"

Nick fidgeted a bit uncomfortable. "Sure."

Brian didn�t believe him. "I said right?"

Nick sighed again, this time with defeat. "I�ll let you know if something is bothering me. Ok?"

Brian smiled not getting as much as a hint of a smile back. "Done deal." But he wasn�t feeling as relieved as he let on. Nick had a habit of agreeing on just about everything to get out off someone nagging him for something. He had to hope that Nick didn�t pull a stunt like this again and if he did he prayed that this wasn�t a cover up for something more..something bigger that his friend refused to acknowledge

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 5

The promotion lunch dragged on forever. Kevin and Howie were busy making small conservsation with Sonia as well as the rest of the producers from the television company. They were talking about their upcoming tour as well as answering questions about how it was being a Backstreet Boy. AJ, as well as Brian filled in from time to time but mainly they concentrated on the full plate in front of them. It was steak and mash potatoes and since they were hungry after just eating a small breakfast they were busy stuffing their faces full. The same couldn�t be said about the youngest member in the group.

Sitting in a slumped position, looking like a bag of potatoes, Nick picked uninterested at his food. Normally he would have been pretty hungry at lunch time, especially when he woke up this early but today he wasn�t hungry at all. His head hurt too much to do any kind of action and it was even a hard task keeping his body straight and all he wanted to do was to lay down on the sofa and get a few hours shut eye. But that was impossible, especially with the tight schedule he was running, and he had to be up and about 24/7, preferably smiling.

"Nick..Nick.." His friend Brian shook his arm and he jerked upon hearing his name. Looking up a bit dazed he mumbled, "What?"

"Sonia was asking you a question." Brian explained while he looked with a worried _expression at the teen. The older man didn�t have to say it but Nick could read in his eyes that he was questioning how he was doing, both physically as well as probably mentally.

"Yes," Kevin filled in. "Sonia was asking you a question about how you like flying."

"Oh Ok.." Nick smiled sheepily. "Sorry I just spaced out."

"That is allright." The interviewer smiled. "The boys were just telling me about how you don�t like flying."

"Uh,,eh..". Looking at his brothers he briefly wondered what they had told about him when she continued, "They say that you are afraid of flying. Is that true?"

Bastards! Nick glared at them. For some natural reason he didn�t want the whole world to find out what he was and wasn�t scared about. Flying was one thing, darkness another yet he wanted to keep some kind of privacy. "A little." He shrugged, trying to act like it didn�t bother him.

" So Nick do you like being here in Canada?"

Nick looked up from his plate, glaring at her. What kind of stupid question was that? He�d been in Canada for approximatly what? 2 hours? Idiot! Opening his mouth he was about to say what he thought about being asked such a stupid question when Kevin stopped him, giving him a hard look. Changing his mind.

"Eh..uh..sure. It�s Ok." That was the only answer he could find.

"Aww..," she chuckled. "Only Ok?" When he didn�t answer a witty reply back she continued with a broken english. "The girls are soooo excited that you arrived here Nickolas. They think you are so cuuuuteeee. Which by the way you aaareeeee" She smiled widely, dragging out on the last syllabels like it was on purpose.

A red tint of embarressment crept up on his cheeks.

If there were one thing he hated it was when someone called him cute, like some freaking cat or baby. The rest of the guys who know what he felt about being called something like this laughed loudly and he knew that there would be comments afterwards.

"How do you like being called cute?"

More laughter.

Licking his lip, searching for something to say he wanted to tell her to get out of his hair, but Kevin's green eyes were constantly on him. Guarding him, preventing him from saying or doing something stupid.

"It�s Ok." Nick wasn�t a man of many words today.

"He likes it!" Howie most have sensed the urge to butt in, cover his ass, since he continued with a large smile. "Nick likes it. As a matter of fact we all likes it. We�re such hams."

Normally Nick would have been grateful for such a comment but today the sugar sweet tone of the latino merely sounded fake making him nauseated. The rest of the table didn�t think so cause they were all laughing have a good time. Nick wasn�t.

'God can�t this lunch be over and done with soon?' he wondered while trying to block his nose from the offending smell of the food in front of him. A headache the size of Texas combined with this Sonia character was making him wanting to find an exit. But no matter how much he wanted to leave the place he knew that he couldn�t. He was a Backstreet Boy and a Backstreet Boy did always have to be ready. Ready for stupid questions with false smiles.

"Nick stop playing with your food and eat!"

Kevin Richardsson was in a bad mood.

Not only did he have to answer stupid question after flying for god knows how many hours, he also had to watch the youngest in the group playing with his food like he was some kind of three year old and then answering with short one word answers whenever he was asked a question. After watching Nick building a mountain with his mashed potatoes, squishing his peas with his fork as well as making a moat with the gravy he simply had enough! It was bad that the teen was disecting his food like it was a frog at lab, but the fact that he was acting sourly and grumpy to every one was getting on his nerves, especially since they were at a promotion lunch and he knew that Nick had better table manners. Or at least hoped he did.

Not saying anything Nick didn�t even look up from his plate and instead continued stabbing his peas like he was picturing Kevin's face in front of him. Irritated over not getting an answer back Kevin snarled in a hushed voice, "Sit up straight. We�re working."

It would have been so easy for Nick to reply that he wasn�t hungry and that his head was just about killing him, yet he was way too stubborn and instead concentrated on stabbing the peas with his fork. As he took up his fork to take a stab into a piece of cucumber in an attempt to mush it up, it happend! His fork slinted and the piece of cucumber drenced in gravy flew like a rocket across the table only to land on someone elses plate.

"Ooops!" Nick felt his cheek go red when he saw where the cucumber landed. In Sonia, the interviewers plate, only to splatter gravy on the white table cloth, Sonias pants as well as Kevins shirt "Shit!" He had no idea that something so small could cause such an explosion.

Maybe it was the tension or the fact that his head hurt so much that it was hard thinking straight or the fact that he felt totally like an ass for embarressing the group like this..again. Whatever it was he did the worst thing anyone could do in a situation like this.

Giggling.

And it wasn�t a small giggle, no it was a big one. That kind of giggle that came from the toes and up and that couldn�t be surpressed no matter how you tried. The laughter inside of him made it hard to sit still and even if the rest of the guys as well as the producers around the table stared at him he couldn�t stop. It had to be a chain reaction, that was something he was sure of, since both Brian as well as AJ saw the humor in the situation and started to laugh too, even if they were doing their best to stiffle it.

Howie nor Kevin laughed. Neither did that Sonia character and their gloomy sight made him want to laugh even more especially since Howie seemed to get red in his face from embarressment and Kevin from anger. Biting his lip he did his best to stop but soon he was laughing so bad that he was jumping in his seat, hand covering his mouth. As to add to the situation people around him where staring to their table and they looked pretty disgusted.

At that moment Nick wanted to die. On the spot!

"NICK!" Kevin/s voice was loud and irritated. He was wiping his shirt with the linen table cloth, but it did nothing for the stain, only spread it wider.

"That isn�t funny." Howie commented, his teeth clenched. He was doing his best to help the interviewer out by dry wiping her pants. No success there either.

"I kno..know..I�m so..sor.." The teen panted while doing his best to catch his breath between the giggle attacks. No matter how he tried he couldn�t stop and that lead him pressing his hand towards his mouth in a vain attempt to stop.

He could only be happy that Johnny was out of the room making a phone call and hadn�t have to view the disaster. Kevin however was and he was not happy.

"Nick what were you thinking?" The older man said, face red like a cooked lobster, after giving up any attempt to save the shirt.

"I said I was sorry." The giggles had died down and now he felt mostly pitiful.

"That�s allright," the Sonia character said with a forced smile while she excused herself to leave to go to the powder room. No doubt trying to get the stain out of her pants. Even tough she did her best to act like it was no big deal Nick could still see in her eyes that she was anything but happy about him. Probably thinking that he was a brat!

Nick nodded, while feeling the tears burn in his eyes. This was such an disaster. He could hear the rest of the guys excusing him and trying to make it all better. One of her personel followed too.

As soon as she was out of the view the youngest expected the shit to hit the fan and he didn�t have to wait long for result.

"How the hell could you do something like that?" Kevin was yelling.

"Hush," Howie was doing his best to keep the older man calm by tugging at his arm. "Relax. Nicky didn�t mean it."

Grateful that the peace maker once again had made an entrance the teen nodded. "I�m sorry." He more or less whispered the words, part from feeling so embarressed, part from not feeling all that sorry.

"Hell Nick you know better." Kevin argued at him for a while and he couldn�t do anything but just listen and trying not to object too much. After all the dark man was right. He�d acted like an ass.

If Kevin had left it with that but being in a bad mood before all of this happened as well as getting your favorite shirt ruined was a bit too much. This made Kevin snap even harder. "Fuck Nick why do you always have to screw things up."

Angry as well as sad about being accussed in such a manner Nick bit his lip. "So..sorry." He was stuttering. Tears burned in the corner of his eyes again and it didn�t help that the bright light from the lamp made his eyes hurt too. He had really fucked up.

Not listening Kevin went on in the old fashioned way that he always did. "If you could only act mature just once..but no that is apparently too much to ask." The older man quarreled.

"Dammit! I told you I was sorry allright." Nick snapped. It wasn�t like he had committed a crime or anything. God Kevin could be so anal sometimes.

"Don�t swear." Now Howie was on his case too.

Nick just wanted to cry. Everybody was against him.

AJ and Brian had sat quiet while the fighting went on at the table, or more like the cussing out of Nick. AJ shifted nervously. He didn�t have much to say and Brian looked like he wanted to be somewhere else. Just to break the tension the eighteen year old said, "Way to go dude!"

Brian lit up. "Yes." He showed with his hand how the cucumber had flown across the table and splashing like a missile. "What an explosion." He smiled towards Kevin, "Hey cus, I know that Kaos can be a pain in the ass, but heck you gotta admit it was quite funny."

If there were someone that could get the older man to brighten up and see the funny in a situation it was B'rok! And thankfully it worked this time too. That and the fact that Sonia was coming back from the ladies room.

"Ok," Kevin said quickly. "B is right. It was kind of funny, but," he put a warning finger up and said in a hushed tone, "If you pull a stunt like that again or something else on this tour I will kick your ass so hard that you get to eat your own nuts." He smiled as he said the last words as Sonia sat down next to him and there were no one beside Nick that heard the last words. And the blonde didnt doubt them either.

Kevin was generally a kind of a nice guy but when you get him upset he could be like a monster. And that was not something Nick would like to encounter. Any time soon.

"The stain went away," the hostess said with delight, before adding, "Oh well accidents happened and I must admit that it was quite funny." She laughed and Nick felt for the first time a bit more at ease. That and relief.

Turning to Kevin he did his best to try and get him in a better mood but every hope to see his brother smiling quickly dimished when he saw his dark irritated eyes. Kevin Richardsson was not an happy man and would give him hell for this. No smiling could make him change his mind and being in the hands of an annoyed Kevin was no fun. No not at all.

Nick sighed. He knew he was in for hell and he didn�t look forward to it either. Yet there was not much he could do, but to wait and see what would happen next. He prayed it wouldn�t be too much since his head was starting to hurt more and more each minute and soon he was going to have to go and ask Howie for those pills or else he was sure his head would explode. And that wouldn�t make Kevin Richardsson too happy either, the explosion that was. Sighing Nick concluded that whatever he did would be wrong.

He could never win...

********************************************************************************************************************************************************

Outside it felt like it turned several more degrees colder and stepping out off the lunch resturant to go to a sports stadium for a small meet and greet after they did some other entertainment stuff which Sonia seemed secret about. After that its finally back to the hotel to shoot some interviews. Lots of fans, girls, were standing outside waiting for them when they came out from the resturant. They were all holding a piece of paper in their hands as well as an instamatic camera, hoping to get a sight and possible a picture of their favorite idols.

Kevin felt sorry for them. Why they would spend their time standing out in the cold was beyond his comprehension and his heart told him that he wanted to make sure that they got a cup of hot cocoa as well as get inside the warmth, yet there was very little he could do. The security was tense and the moment the guys stepped outside the girls started screaming very loud, doing everything to get to the boys.

Since Kevin was the last to step out into the chilled air he could hear Johnny shouting to the screaming fans outside that if they wanted to get an autograph or a photo they had to calm down and dont push so much. Both Brian and AJ had tended to their tasks and they were busy writing their names down to excited fans that were looking at them with admiration in their eyes. Howie was also busy with taking pictures and to Kevin's dismay he noticed that Nick was the only one that looked like he wanted to get the hell out of the way and get back into the warmth of the bus.

The teen stood with his hands in his jeans pockets, his white hood on his head like he was freezing cold. There were an uninterested look plastered on his face as two girls approached him, paper and pen in their hand.

Annoyed Kevin watched as his younger brother reluctantly grabbed the paper, scribbled his name and then handed it back to the girls with not even a single smile on his lips. The older man realised that the reason for this action could be tiredness, yet that was not an excuse since they were all obligated to tend to their schedule, smile and please the fans. It was their living and without the fans they would be nothing. He knew that in the past Nick had pulled a stunt or two, claiming that he had a headache to get away off the meets and greets and autograph signing and as soon as Kevin would get a few minutes over he would have a word with the teen. Telling him what he thought of the way he acted towards those two girls. The kid needed to be straightened out right now to be back on the track again.

Soon Kevin was distracted too with girls wanting to take pictures with him and he did it with a smile on his lips. The girls were talking fast, telling him how much they meant to them and it was these kinds of encounters that filled his heart with warmth even on a day like this. In the corner of his eye he noticed that everyone but Nick was still giving out autographs. Glancing up he spotted the person in question stepping up on the stairs of the bus and this had him even more irritated than before. It was time for autograph signing and taking pictures, Johnny had decied that, and then they could do nothing but obey. If the teen thought that he could get away with special treatment he better re-think twice.

Trying to focus on the girl in front of him he said with a southern drawl, "What�s your name honey?"

The brunette that looked like she had froze all of her limbs standing there in a short top and a jacket that were open so they would see the blue stone in her belly button, no doubt making that action so they would think she was sexy, squeeled in delight "Joan."

"That�s nice Joan." Kevin smiled at her as he took her piece of paper from her shaking hand. "Are you coming to the concert?" he asked while scribbling down his name.

"Yes," she squeeled. "Yes me and my sister are going." A brief pause. "We have first row tickets."

"Oh." Kevin looked up. "That is nice. I hope that you enjoy the concert." He handed back the paper to her with a smile. "You take care."

"Thank youuuuu." The girl looked like she�d won first prize in a lottery auction.

"Your welcome." Kevin was about to accept another piece of paper when she stopped him. "Yes?"

"Do you? Do you think that I can have a hug?" There was stutter in her words like she�d really tried to find the courage to ask him.

"Yes sure." He took her in his embrace and she almost got lost into his arms. Noticing that she was shaking, possibly from the cold or nervousness or maybe both, he said to her, "Joan you have to get inside so you don't get a cold."

Those words most have really warmed her cause she said to him. "Wow you are the nicest Backstreet Boy."

He laughed at her. "Really?"

"Yes," the girl continued, "You�re not like Nick who doesn�t even wanna sign anything and just went into the bus."

Hearing these words Kevin felt like he�d been hit in the stomach. Nick�s behavoir was not good and the worst thing that could happend was if the fans started talking bad about them. "I�m sure he had his reasons." Kevin did his best to try to act like what she told didn�t disturb him, which was nothing but a lie cause it did.

"No he was just being rude," her friend filled in. "He even snapped at me when I wanted to have an autograph."

He didn�t know what to say, just tried to act like he�d hadn�t heard that being said. Now there would definatly be a talk to the teen. Opening his mouth to appologize he heard Johnny call for him.

"Kevin we have to get going now."

"Ok." He gave both of the girls a short hug before hurrying away. "Sorry I have to get going..." Before he knew what hit him he was back in the warmth of the bus again. Kevins first intention was to talk to Nick but then he discovered that Brian has sat down beside the blonde and by the look of it Nick had his eyes closed, either trying to take a cat nap or shielding from the world in an attempt not to be talked too.

This had Kevin sighing. Sometimes Nick was acting so immature, and he wished that the teen would grow up. He knew that the business was hard and that it was rough on his friend, yet he refused to accept such behavoir like Nick had done today. Even if you were in a bad mood it was unexusable being rude to the fans. No matter how tired you were.

Sitting down on the seat next to Howie he closed his eyes. The flight was taking its toll on his body and even if he�d acted all happy with the fans he was still way to tired to go to a meet and greet and do interviews and things like that. Being the perfectionist that he was he didn�t allow any slip ups and therefore pressed himself into working harder than anyone else. This was often the only thing that had him going and strangely enough he liked it.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 6
This was the worst crap he�d ever had to endure. Sitting on the staircase in a large drafty hallway and participating in a French class was something that really sucked. On top of this he had to pretend that he was really interested since this event would be aired on TV later on. This was worse than that photo shoot when the photographer, no doubt a pervert, had wanted to take pictures of them in a men's room, standing by the urinal. Nick didn�t know what was worse, the fact that he was in a situation like that or the clothes he had to wear. Golf pants yuck! Today at least he had his own clothes which was a comfort in the midst of all this misery.

There had been many situations when someone, usually a photographer or the camera crew, decided that they had to do something out of the ordinary and usually they could do nothing but act upon it. Sighing Nick concluded that this was no different then an ordinary school lesson that he had to do on the weekdays. Since they were touring all the time there was a tutor with them to help him and AJ with their school work. School had never been high on his list and he had to struggle each day to get work done, usually in between the shows or when he had other obligations to tend too. Spare time was something that was rare these days.

Brian gave him a look like 'What�s wrong dude?' and quickly he smiled towards the camera, pretending to be interested in what ever crap was playing on in front of him. He knew when to smile at the right places and looking "cute" in the camera angle. Usually he would goof off too but not today. Today he just felt like sitting down, quiet in a corner and pretend that no one saw him. The headache that had accompanied him all morning was steadily getting worse and he had a hard time thinking clear thoughts. His head felt all buzzy and he could compare it to what it had to feel like walking on clouds.

It was cold and drafty sitting on the staircase and he�d been lucky that no one had pointed out to him that he was still sporting his outdoor sweatshirt and that they wanted him down in a tee instead. Swallowing hard he thought that the only good thing today was that he had managed a few minutes of rest on the bus and the nausea that had crept upon him at the restaurant was on the rebound. It had been worse when he had to sign those autographs and the girls kept screaming all the time hadn�t helped matters much.

He knew that he hadn�t sounded too thrilled when the fans wanted to talk to him but his legs had felt like overcooked spaghetti and as the world suddenly turned 180 degrees for a few seconds all he wanted to do was to get back into the bus, sit down and hope that the dizziness would disappear. Luckily it had helped but he knew by the look on Johnnie as well as Kevin's face that he would be in for a ride too. They had taken notice of his disappearing act and he would have to answer for it later on. 'Oh well,' Nick thought sullenly, 'What else was new?'.

Shrugging his thoughts away he concentrated on the two young girls that were standing next to Sonia. They couldn�t be more than thirteen at the tops and when he tried talking to them they had just giggled. After a while he had given up and instead sat down on the staircase, waiting for the show to go on. Either they hadn�t understood a word of what he said or they was way too nervous or they were retards. Nick opted for the second option. Not that it mattered anyway since any attempt to talk had required strength from his side and this was not something that he had plenty off. Not today at least.

"We thought it would be really cool if you guys would be able to speak some French phrases," Sonia went on, "You know so you can wild the audience." She gestured wildly with her hands. "Is that ok with you guys?"

They all nodded. Nick included.

"Cool." AJ said.

"Tres bien," could be heard from Brian.

This last word stopped the reporter. "Tres bien," she was clearly impressed. "Brian you�re impressing me." Her smile was wide as was Brian's receiving the compliments.

Looking at his friend Nick noticed that Brian played a bit goofy in front of the camera and deep inside he felt a bit surprised. He�d never known that the Kentuckian could speak French, and with the right accent too. Howie was usually the language genius in the group and smugly Nick thought that it wouldn�t be long before Sweet D would take up the fight for the trophy. Once the shock had died down the reporter went on with presenting the two girls. The two lucky fans that had been designated to act like the guys tutors.

"They are going to teach a couple of phrases." The host looked at them "Are you guys ready?"

No! He wasn�t ready, yet that he couldn�t say that and he nodded like the rest of the guys. He suspected that at least AJ was as interested as he was and actually got a bit surprised when he noticed the rebel following the language like he�d talked it before. People often misjudged AJ, thinking that he was an hardass when he in reality was very smart, street smart and did very good with his school work.

Nick kept a low profile in a hope to get the guys to think he was spacing out again and then pay him none or at least little attention. Kevin was the one that had caught him an eye or two and he could see that the older man wasn�t too happy about him. Why he had no idea since clearly it couldn�t just be about the "pea accident" could it?

Kevin had also snapped at him when he�d asked about when they would be done for the day. He�d responded in an annoyed tone something like "Why? Are you trying to skip things again?" When he�d objected his older brother had shut him up with, "Don�t you think that you�re getting special treatment. You have obligations like the rest of us!"

Jeeze Kevin was testy.

The words had Nick in for a surprise since it wasn�t like Kevin to act in such a way. He had no chance to defend himself since the moment he opened his mouth to ask what was the matter with his friend the camera crew told them that they had to take a seat and get ready for the shoot. Taking his position next to Brian on the step he decided to show his "brothers" that he wasn�t skipping out of things and tried to act as casual as it was possible. Part of him wished that he�d told his friends how shitty he felt since maybe then they would have a bit of compassion, or at least understand why he was in a mood. But then on the other hand it could lead to that they thought he was a whiner, a wuss, a whimp, and that was something he hated to be called. If he would start to feel worse the guys would find out sooner or later and therefore he decided to keep his mouth shut, at least for the time being since a headache was nothing to take too much concern about.

The woman was talking and talking and he desperately wished that she would come to the point sometime. Listening with half an ear he took in that she was presenting the two girls, while the other half was turning back to his thoughts about Kevin. For some unknown reason Kevin had snarled at him "We�re going to have a talk later on tonight, Nickolas." Kevin only acted that way when it was something serious or he was really upset and now his thoughts wondered off what it was all about.

He wasn�t being very talkative today but then who could blame him? The headache combined with the jetlag made his head spin and it was almost impossible to concentrate on something else beside the throbbing pain in his temples. Being out in the cold too long had left shivers down his body and now he was suffering from chills running down his spine all the time. It felt like he was coming down with something. Pulling the sleeves of his sweatshirt over his hands he tried to get some warmth into his shivering body. God couldn�t someone turn up the heat?

A laugh from the guys brought him back to reality. It was Brian that was goofing around and the reporter simply loved him. Howie, who usually ended up as the reporters pet, sat in silence and Nick could tell that he didn�t like being ditched by Brian and would probably go for her attention too. Probably by showing off when it was his turn to say the French words.

All of the guys were such attention hams and they were all playing it along to the camera, one time or the other.

"We will teach you a couple of suggestions." Sonia continued, looking at them before continuing, "Ok are you guys ready?"

Nick nodded like in autopilot. He had no idea what she was talking about but since the rest of the guys seemed to be agreeing so did he.

"Mylene," she gestured towards one of the girls "is going to teach you some phrase that you can use when you�re opening the show. You know sometimes it can be fun to say a word or two. Ok?"

Another nod.

"They will teach you how to open the show. You know say hi to everybody, how you�re doing, you know that sort of feel."

Before Nick knew what hit him the girls read up some sentences on French that was completely impossible to understand. He felt his mind go in overdrive and for a moment he hesitated if he should leave the room. Having to listening to someone talking was bad but to actually hear words being said in a foreign language and then also following it by repeating what those girls said made it impossible.

There were a loud buzzing sound when everybody but Nick was doing their best to follow the words and show off in the process. Not successful at all.

"I�ve got it!" Brian goofed off a bit, trying to divert the attention of the bad language skills that everyone showed.

Noticing that the boys looked like questionmarks the hostess took back the ball. "Ok lets do one word at the time."

The guys were all talking in the mouth of each other, all but Nick that felt like he just wanted to lay down. This was too much for his tired brain and it didn�t help his headache much either. Kevin that sat behind was talking really loud and for a moment he wanted to turn around and tell him to be a bit more quiet but that would be really inappropriate and instead Nick suffered in silence.

All of the guys were really into the lesson, AJ included and they were following all the words that was being said. Nick on the other hand just wished that this torture would be over and he would be able to get to his hotelroom and sleep.

Brian most have sensed that something was off since he mouthed a "you�re ok?" while the girls were talking. He had no chance to answer since Sonia demanded their attention again.

"Let�s everybody say after me, Bonsoir tout le monde."

The guys, all but Nick repeated after her and to his dismay he found out that they were really into this lesson. They kept repeating the sentence all over again. It was freaking annoying since he had no idea what they were talking about.

"Bonsoir tout le monde. Everybody one at the time."

Nick felt like he would die. Not only hadn�t he paid attention but having to say a French phrase, in the correct accent was something that he dreaded. He would make a fool out of himself.

Cold sweat trickled down his forehead and his neck. Hearing the guys pronounce the sentence without flaws made him even more nervous and he was starting to think that he would screw it all up. His hands felt strangely cold and the more she saluted the rest of the boys over their fine accents the more pressure he felt.

"Howies turn."

The Latino said with perfection, "Bonsoir tout le monde." Adding a smile afterwards."Mon cheri!"

That was so much like Howie, always trying to be a charmer. Normally it would have made him laugh but this time he could feel everybody waiting for him to continue. In a fast speed he said the words and was very relieved that she didn�t correct him or nothing. The guys repeated the sentence once again and this time he followed along. Finally Sonia seemed to have enough and moved along with the topic.

Brian goofed again and Nick hit him in the head, like they often did when they were playing along with the camera. All to grant the fans.

She kept talking about the songs and how they would sound in French and Nick listened while trying to judge why it had gotten so hot in the room all of the sudden. He wished he�d taken off his sweatshirt since the blinding light was making him sweat something devious. It wasn�t all the light was making him. For some strange reason, could have to do with the headache the light made his eyes sensitive and he felt them water more and more.

The words Sonia had written on the old chalk board was hard to distinguished and her repeating it didn�t help matters either. The guys were talking in their mouth again and the sound was reaching loud levels. Brian was the first to figure out what it meant.

"I�ll never break your heart." He said it like he was a born Frenchman.

"Oh Brian! B'rok!" Sonia squealed in delighted as she guessed over him what a talent he was.

"I knew it," Howie whispered to him and Nick couldn�t help but smile inside. The battle was on. They were really competing right now.

Brian, not wasting any time, made a gesture of victory, calling out a happy, "Qui, Qui!"

"Great man." Kevin greeted him. AJ was silent, either he thought that Brian was taking too much space or he didn�t think it was worth congratulating. Nick started to suspect that he was getting just as tired of this charade too.

The teen looked appreciatively at his friend. It was good that B was winning over Howie since D had a habit of always wanted to be so outstanding in everything. But so did Brian too. They were both competitors on different arenas.

"You wanna read this one?" Sonia was turning all her attention to Brian now.

"I�m what?" The Kentuckian looked stupidly into the camera while repeating the French words she said to him. Howie was the one following the words that Brian said and Nick smiled again. The Latino refused to loose.

"Oh that is very good Brian," Sonia gushed to all of them before adding, "Do you think you can sing the song I�ll never break your heart to us?"

"Sure." Brian was really in a good mood.

"Ok."

Right before they were about to start Nick felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning around he was met with AJ�s concerned look. "You alright?"

Looking down, shielding away from his searching eyes Nick mumbled a yes before it was time to start singing "I�ll never break your heart" Acapella.

"Sure?" It was clear that the rebel didn�t believe him.

"Mmmm." Nick was too tired to say anything and deep inside he wondered if it showed so much how poorly he was feeling and what the fans would think.

"You ready?" Kevin broke in before they sang on cue.

Closing his eyes Nick felt a moment of comfort since it hurt too much to keep them opened. He hoped that it would come away like he was emotional and not doing his best to stay awake. The chills that had his body in a grip had lessened and replaced was a burning feeling on his cheeks. Now he was pretty sure that he was running a fever and it wasn�t all jetleg anymore.

He sang holding his arms around his legs and rocking slowly to the music and before he knew it they were done singing. Looking up he noticed Brian frowning at him like he was wondering what was the matter. There was big applause from Sonia, the girls and the camera crew.

Looking at the guys she grabbed her chalk and then wrote a big A on the board. "You made it!"

"Whoaaaa." All of the guys screamed, making a victory sign, Nick included. "This was fun!" It was Brian's words no doubt.

"Thank you so very much for this lesson," Sonia said with a large smile and the girls giggled in response.

"No it�s us that should say thank you," Howie charmed, blinking his eye in that stupid way that Nick thought was a bit too much. As to state his point he filled in "Merci."

"Oh man," AJ snickered in the back, him too getting a notice of the game that he and Brian was playing.

"Thank you for coming here and singing to us." The reporter really knew how to spread around nice words. Before anyone could object she added "And now we�re on our way to the meet and greet. Follow me and we�ll walk a short cut through the basement to the arena.

"Just peachy," Nick muttered sullenly. There was no strength what so ever to get up and meet a bunch of fans. His joints felt stiff and achy and he was getting more and more certain that another flu bug had hit his system. Brian as well as the rest of the guys moved on swiftly while Nick felt like an old man getting up. With slow steps that felt like he was trapped in slowmotion he made it out of the room. He had to stop to catch his breath.

Shit he felt really bad now.

A chill ran down his spine and he desperately wished he�d taken on something warmer than just this. Running his hands up and down across his arms Howie spotted him standing, waiting for the rest of the guys to make an entrance so they could go into the sports arena and the hundreds of waiting fans.

"You cold?" Howie looked at him with a frown.

"A bit." Nick admitted, closing his eyes as to savor some strength. Looking up he murmured "I guess I didn�t take anything warm with me and this," he nipped at his sweatshirt "this does nothing for this kind of cold."

"You wanna borrow my jacket?"

"No." Nick shook his head, "That�s fine. I just need to find a hat or a cap or something to put on my head. It�s freezing and you know." He smiled palely, "You know what my mom use to say. Always protect your head and you will get warmth."

Howie chuckled. "Yeah Nicky your mom was right." With that he picked something out of his jacket pocket. Something gray. Handing it to Nick he said, "Here take this at least. I don't need it."

Looking down at the gift he saw that it was striped knitted hat in different shades of gray. It was quite ugly and his first thought was how Howie had ended up with a hat like this. Was this something that a fans would give him? If it was that girl sure had no taste!

"Mom packed it to me," the Latino explained apologetically. He blushed.

Nick smiled back. Howie was 24 and his mom packed down his stuff for him. Was that weird or what? But then his own thoughts went back to his mother and the smile faded suddenly. He was 16 and he was supposed to pack down his own stuff. His mother had never time for such things since she was way too busy tending to his other four siblings. Which was worse, having a mother caring or one that didn�t? He had no idea.

"Eh..uh..tell..tell your mom that it was good that she packed this..and..and that I could borrow it." The teen put it on his head, making sure that his ears were warm and cozy. Maybe this was the only thing that mattered to him, that he�d been in the wind and cold too long.

"You know Nicky," Howie said after studied him. "You can have that cap if you want."

"I can?" He wasn�t little surprised over the sudden generosity that his friend had showed him. "I mean is that really ok?"

"Sure." Howie shrugged as to state his point. "I�ll just ask my grandma to knit me another one." He smiled towards the teen. "No problem really."

"Your..your grandma made you this?" The ugly knitted cap on his head felt suddenly pretty good. Howie could laugh himself happy to have such great relatives.

"Yeah and if you.." Howie started but was cut off by Kevin coming back towards them.

"There you are! What are you doing here stalling?" He sounded a bit annoyed. "We�ve been waiting for you since Sonia was going to show us a short cut. Come on," he pulled at Nicks sleeve, "Come on or we�ll be late at the meet and greet."

Nick wanted to object, wanted to tell Kevin how he really felt but there were no use since the older man wasn�t in a listening mood. He seemed a bit stressed out. He was also in a foul mood.

Brian came running, "The fans are waiting and we�re a bit late." He gestured with his thumb towards a staircase further down, "Come on follow me. AJ and the rest is waiting for you."

God Nick wanted to say. They were acting like he was hours late when in reality it couldn�t be more than minutes. He walked briskly next to the others, not wanting to let them know that he had a hard time keeping up. Down the stairs he found AJ, Sonia, Johnny, the girls and the camera crew.

"There you are," Sonia said the moment they appeared in the door. "We�re running a bit late so you have to hurry." She opened the door in front of her. "Off you go."

Nick felt annoyed. She sounded like a pre-school teacher.

"Hurry up Kaos," AJ shouted when he saw that Nick wasn�t tagging along like the rest of them.

"Ok..Ok.." he panted, "I�m co..coming." The teen was doing his best to keep up but his legs refused to obey and it felt like soda flooded his veins, making him all fuzzy. Every step made his head hurt even more and he was having a hard time to keep up with them. Just when he thought he couldn�t take it anylonger they arrived at the door. The door that lead to the sports arena and to all of the screaming fans. The door that lead to even more misery.

Nick groaned. This was a bit too much and he didn�t know how he would cope with it all. Yet he had to do it. All for the fans!

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 8
There were days when you wished you�d never woke up!

It was those days when everything went wrong from the first start and then continued on with the same pace without showing any signs of stopping.

It was those days when your mood was usually so bad that everyone within miles of you should back off since you would most likely sneer at them or start a conflict.

Unfortunately it was also those days when you could hurt someone that you liked very much just because they happened to be in the way of your anger.

Today was such a day for Kevin Richardson

There were so many things and people that annoyed him today, but none of them could top having to baby-sit one particular Nickolas Gene Carter! The kid had a habit of pulling on all his emotional cords, good and bad and today the mere look at him made Kevin throw a tantrum. He was sick and tired of the kid always getting along with everything just by whining loud enough.

Ok most of his feelings were uncalled for since deep inside he had to confess that he liked the kid despite having the habit of getting on his nerves too. Today however it was not particularly Nick he was pissed at even if he did make him angry.

Early this morning life had been pretty good. He�d woken up in the arms of his longtime girlfriend Kristin and after having a nice breakfast in bed as well as making love it was time to get ready to go on tour. He didn�t want to leave her but there was a job to be done and they would meet each other again in a couple of weeks. After kissing each other he went into the bathroom to take a quick shower and get ready. While he was standing there letting the water rinse over him there was a phone call. Before he had a chance to respond he heard Kristin pick up the phone, At first he hadn�t thought much about it before he heard her mention things like "No not right now" , "You have to wait", and "Yes come over when he leaves." The words had sounded very strange to him and when he�d asked afterwards who it was she had responded by saying that it was one of her girlfriends and that they were going shopping. It had all sounded too strange and suddenly he�d put two and two together. This could only mean one thing.....She was cheating on him!

Getting out of the shower he�d been mad as hell. He would never take anyone cheating on him and when he asked her straight forward if she had anyone beside him she had denied it all. This had him even more upset and soon the fight was at full speed.

There mere thought about what had went on earlier in the morning had him ready to flip out!

Kristin had been his girlfriend on and off for the past four years and she was the only one that he had ever loved in that special way that made him think of wanting to spend an entire life with. He had other girlfriends but none were like her. She was patient with him but most of all she believed in him and was willing to fight for their love. They had been through so many ups and downs in their relationship already and the fact that she was cheating on him came like a shocking surprise. Ok he had to confess that he hadn�t come clean with her in the past, and there had been other girls, but now, when they were half and half living together in her apartment he was completely faithful.

Unfortunately the same couldn�t be said for her.

She had denied cheating on him over and over again, but he hadn�t listened and instead accused her of lying. Kristin, the girl that usually took everything calm and relaxed had shown temper and old stuff from the past, both sides, had been dragged up. Things that were being mentioned was when Kevin had been with one of their producers at a strip club in Las Vegas as well as that time he cheated on her with a model at an after party.

The words had been harsh. They had screamed at each other, calling each other names and in the end she had cried and it was then that it happened. She had yelled to him that their relationship was over and done with and that he shouldn�t bother to come back to her again. As to state her point she had thrown out all of his clothes from her closet on the floor and then told him that his stuff would be packed in boxes and that he could come and pick them up once he arrived home from Canada.

Afraid that she was meaning what she said he had tried to calm her down and then took back all of his accusations. He�d even cried too, wanting to get her back. But in a cold voice she had told him that she was sick and tired of putting up with his behavior and that no matter what he said it was over. She told him that she expected her key back too and when he begged her to forgive him she had told him with tears clouding her eyes that if he didn�t trust her there were no grounds for them to continue with this relationship and it was better for them to go their separate ways. Love without trust was not a stable ground to build a life on.

The clock on the wall had been ticking. Time passed fast and he was already late with getting a cab out to the airport where he was supposed to meet up with his cousin to fly out to Canada for the tour. All that seemed so unimportant right now and never in his life had he wanted so bad to leave the group. He wanted to stay and talk to Kristin in an attempt to sort everything out. But no matter how he wanted to stay he couldn�t do that. The rest of the guys, the fans, were waiting for him. They depended on him and he had obligations to do. His private life had to be set aside.

Grabbing his suitcase and walking out from the apartment a sudden realization hit him. He was not only walking out of the room, he was walking out from the love of his life too. And he had lost. Lost the woman that he loved. He had lost Kristin.

Just thinking back at this event made his stomach clench with fear. He hadn�t told anyone about what was on his mind and as things were looking right now he wouldn�t say anything either. Brian had been on his case in the plane, wanting to know what was on his mind, but when he had told his cousin that everything was just fine Brian had dropped the subject. Not asking anything more, probably thinking that Kevin was just in a bad mood.

Which wasn�t that far from truth? The bad mood that was.

Taking his steps in a long stride he felt someone grabbing his arm. "Kevin wait up. Please.."

"What?" Annoyed, he found Nick half running next to him, his complexion red from strain. Instantly he regretted snapping at him but the kid was on his nerves so much these days that the mere sight of him had him in a bad mood. Like if he wasn�t in one before.

"You�re walking too fast. I can�t keep up...Please slow down. " The tone was whiny and tired. There was also something pleading in the teens eyes as he was doing his best to keep up with his brothers. Kevin was in no mood to listen to his baby brother complaining. Jerking his arm away from the blondes grip he groaned

"Oh please..leave me alone!!"

Quickening his pace he noticed that Nick wasn�t following beside him anymore and stopping he noticed the teen standing a bit hunched, his hands on his knees like he was catching his breath. Noticing that the rest of the guys were much too far ahead to stop he walked back. Annoyed but also a bit concerned. "What�s the matter?"

"Nothing" Nick didn�t look up, just stood there a bit hunched.

"You feel sick?"

"No." The teen shook his head but he made no move to stand up either, or meet his eyes.

Kevin was loosing his temper. "Bullshit! If it was nothing you wouldn�t be standing like that, looking like you�re about to kneel over any sec."

"I said it was nothing." Nick snarled back.

"Hey!" Kevin was loosing his patience. "Then if everything is ok then get a move on cause we�re late. Come on."

Nick shook his head. "No leave me."

"Leave you?" Kevin frowned. "Why?" Nick could be such a drama queen sometimes.

"I�m tired." The tone was whiny but there was also defeat in his voice.

Kevin softened a bit. "Oh come on Nicky..grab my hand." He motioned with his hand for the teen to grab it but the gesture was being ignored. Frowning the older man continued, "You sure you�re all right?" There was something in the teens approach that had him questioning. Nick could be difficult and whiny but this time he was actually acting like something was bothering him very much.

"Yes!" The teen looked up through his bangs. "What do you care?" His eyes were filled with tears.

Surprised, but also shocked over his appearance Kevin set his own problems aside momentarily. "You�re crying?" His tone was gentle.

"No." Nick who had straightened up wiped his nose with the back of his sleeve.

Noticing this Kevin frowned with disgust. "Can�t you use a tissue." He stopped himself when he saw the hurt _expression on the teen's face. Shaking his head he added, "There�s something you�re not telling me, is there?

The blonde boy looked disheveled and Kevin felt an urge to tell him to straighten up. After all they were going to work and he couldn�t look like a bum. Nick's hair was messy and he was constantly wiping away a strand of hair that fell into his eyes. A sudden feeling of wanting to give the kid a hug came all over him but it was quickly wiped away when Johnny urged them to hurry up.

"Kevin, Nick, what the hell are you two doing?" The black manager sounded annoyed. "Hurry up get your white asses here. You�re late!"

Knowing that there was no use in making the manager even madder the two bandmates hastened their steps. Reaching the manager they were instantly met with hard words. "Richardson I thought I told you and Carter to hurry your ass up. This isn�t exactly a Sunday school picnic" He pointed at his watch. "Now we're late" Looking at the youngest member he said, "Carter is it you that is holding everybody up?"

Kevin felt a sudden urge to defend his brother. "No it�s not him that is holding us up. He was asking about a thing and I answered and then..."

Johnny cut him off. "Ok Richardson save it! We don�t have time for a speech right now. The others are waiting." He gestured towards the stairs, "Come on follow me" With that the manager was up the stairs closely followed by the others.

Kevin felt a bit annoyed over being treated like a kid by his manager but there was not much he could do about the situation. He took the stairs with long steps. Glancing at his back he noticed that Nick was taking his time. 'Oh come on hurry up' he wanted to say but stopped himself when he noticed how tight Nick was holding the bannister, as if it was the only thing that held him up straight and prevented him from falling over.

The more he looked at the kid the more he noticed that something was definitely off with the kid. Maybe he should ask what was the matter. But then maybe not. With a sigh he thought that his friend was probably just tired which wasn�t strange considering that they had all traveled so long and they were suffering from jetlag too.

Besides there were other, more important things on his mind to be concerned about then a whiny brat that was feeling a bit under the weather. As soon as the interview would be over he would call his girlfriend, tell her he was sorry and then ask her, beg her, to take him back....

******************************************************************************************************************************************************************

A bed!!!!

The first Nick lay his eyes upon entering the room was the large Queen size bed that practically took up the whole space. Brian as well as Howie had already occupied it and they were busy lying on the bed spread, talking and joking around. AJ on the other hand sat on the corner of the bed, watching the two of them goof around.

"Sorry I�m a bit late." The teen mumbled apologetically to his friends.

"Oh hi Frack." Brian looked up. "I didn�t see you coming." He paused, "What happend?

"Eh.." Nick thought what to say, "Me and Kev kind of talked.." He was interrupted by Howie who smiled at him.

"That�s great buddy. You two seem to have some differences that you gotta work out."

"The only difference they have is that Kev is acting like an ass, not wanting to see how shitty Nick looks." AJ muttered from behind them.

Ignoring this comment Nick sat carefully down on the bed, like he was afraid that the wooden furniture would break by the mere touch. Truth was however that the only thing he was afraid would really break was nothing but his skull. Every move he made felt like his head would explode. Like it would split open and the yellow green brain substance would spill all over the white bedspread. Like one gigantic slimy spot.

Nick grimaced. Vivid imagination was not always something that was great to have and even if he knew it was all in his head it was starting to make him a bit ill. Swallowing hard he tried to get the lump that was forming in the back of his throat to disappear.

"Yo Nick!" Brian was waving his hand in front of his face as to get his attention.

"What?" Nick jerked back in his thoughts. Clearing the cobwebs from his mind he mumbled a bit confused. "Did you say something?"

Brian nodded. "I asked you if you wanted to lay down but you�ve been spacing out on me all the time." There was a frown, "You ok?"

"Yes" The teen sounded a bit annoyed over being constantly asked questions about his health.

"'K." Brian didn�t sound too convinced yet he didn�t press on any further either. Patting on the space beside him he said lightly, "This is the best. Come and lay down here"

Eyeing the offer his friend thought for a moment. It sounded very tempting if Nick hadn�t been so afraid that the second he would lay down his aching head on the pillow he would fall asleep. Dead to the world. Stealing himself he shook his head, "Nah I�m fine," when he felt Brian drag in his arm.

"Come on Frack. You need it. Just for a few."

He wasn�t that hard to persuade. "Ok." With that he laid down on the bed, closing his eyes to the bright light. Turning on his stomach he lay down his aching head against the cool bedspread. God this felt so good. He could hear his friends talking behind his back, joking about something that he was no doubt involved in, yet he didn�t care. There was no strength to get up again and he desperately wished that this feeling would last forever, or at least until he felt well enough to do the interview. The words got more and more slurred and soon he felt his eyelids go heavy and before he knew it he fell asleep.

"Nicky, come on. Wake up."

The words as well as the gentle shake on his shoulder were what woke him up. A bit disoriented he blinked at the bright light in the room.

"You all right man?" Howies concerned eyes peered down at him.

"Mmmm..yes." Confused he tried to remember where he was when Brian's voice could be heard next to him.

"You fell asleep."

"I did?" His head felt like mush and the headache was making it hard to think straight. Slowly he tried to sit up just to find out that the limbs in his body refused to cope with him. Every bone in his body ached and that combined with the chills that were constantly wracking him made him feel pretty lousy and now he was pretty sure that he was actually running a temperature. That would account the strange feeling. a mixture of exhaustion and pure illness.

Howie nodded. "You look a bit sick. You sure that you�re ok?" His brown eyes were searching for answers.

"Uh..ye..yes." There was no need to worry his friends therefore he told them a white lie. Besides what could they do anyway? A fever, if he had one, had to run it�s course and even if he felt like total and utter crap, the guys as well as the management, had told him that he had obligations to do. So what else could he do but follow it?

A thought popped up in his mind. "Was I out for long?"

"No." Howie shook his head. "Only a few minutes." He leaned his head to the side like he was trying to excess how the teen was really feeling, "You�re that tired?"

"A bit." Nick yawned. There was no use in lying on that account since they could all see how exhausted he was.

"Try and make it," AJ said encouragingly from where he was sitting. "The interview is soon over and then we have some time off."

"No we don�t," Kevin stated coming into the room.

"Huh?"

"After this we�ve gotta do some one on one interviews, then after that we�re free for about an hour."

"For real?" Brian looked a bit shocked. He�d promised to call his girlfriend Samantha as soon as there was a break.

"Yup." Kevin nodded before spotting the teen on the bed. "Nick," he barked, "Sit up straighter."

Listening to the command he did his best to obey his older brother. But it was hard since everytime he sat up his head ached so much that he just wanted to lay back down again. With a groan he did his best and soon he was sitting up, hanging with his head like it was too heavy to hold up.

Eyeing him Kevin muttered, "God you look like a complete mess."

Nick opened his mouth to say something back when Brian cut in, "Yeah you do Frack." He was about to stroke away the bangs from his friends eyes when the teen jerked away, not wanting to be touched. This motion made Brian frown, yet he said nothing further since a woman's voice broke the silence.

"This is sooo neat." Sonia squealed delighted. "Five good looking boys in the same bed. Can this get any better?" She chuckled before turning to her camera man, "Jaques you have to take a picture with me and the boys all together in this bed."

There was a laughter of nervousness in the room. Was this woman being serious?

Nick didn�t have time to think before he was whisked over to the corner of the bed, leaning his aching back against the white wall. AJ was sitting next to him and then Kevin. Both Howie and Brian pulled the lucky straw and they got to lay down on the bed during the interview.

The teen thought it wasn�t fair but then he reasoned that maybe it was a good choice since if he�d been the one on the bed he wouldn�t have promised NOT falling asleep. And that would have looked bad to the media.

Sonia prepared to ask the first question and as she asked them about what they were doing here in Canada Jaques suddenly yelled from his camera position." No No No."

A bit surprised they looked at the short man.

"What is it?" Sonia asked, annoyed over being interrupted in her line of duty."

"The blonde boy..Nick," he pointed at the teen, " He can not wear that white sweatshirt. It blends in against the white wall."

"Oh" Nick felt stupid.

"Then what should we do?" Sonia looked at the young teen with despair. "Should he lay down on the bed too?"

"No the bedspread is white too," Jaques said before suggesting, "Nick can you take off that sweatshirt?"

Normally this wouldn�t have been that big of a question but today when he was feeling miserable it was like he was being told to strip naked.

"Do I have to?" He knew that he sounded a bit whiny, yet he didn�t care. The outlook of having to shred his clothes, feeling this chilled out seemed like something he wanted to stall as long as possible.

"Yes" Sonia felled the final statement.

"But..but I�m cold." He knew it was stupid but this had him close to tears.

"Don�t be stupid." Brian said with a sigh. "Just do what you�ve been told to do so we can get out of this interview sometime before midnight."

Nick, not wanting to give up his precious sweatshirt, protested a few times before Kevin snarled at him.

"God Nick, stop being so immature" His hardass brother looked at him, "What are you so afraid to show? Your tummy?"

The rest of the guys laughed at this comment. Nick smiled too, but deep inside he felt embarrassed over the words his friend had felled.

Without further argument he did as they all wanted and shivering he pulled the sweatshirt over his head, only to reveal a green sports tee that did nothing to provide the warmth he so desperately yearned for.

Sonia was the only one that was delighted.

"Oh Nicky," she squealed, "That�s such a nice shirt."

"Thanks." Nick forced back a backstreet smile. "Green is my favorite color."

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 7
As always there had been changes in the schedule once they arrived at the sports arena.

"There have been some changes in the schedule," Johnny said firmly, "Due to some technical problems with the sound equipment on stage you will first do the meet and greet."

A noise of disappointment could be heard in the corridor. Ignoring this, the black manager continued, "There are twenty-five fans, all winners in a contest that Much Music held a few months back, that you will meet and greet." He looked at everyone of the guys, "You know the usual routine..signing, taking pictures and small talk."

The five men nodded. Meet and greets have always been a big part of meeting their fans and they had done about hundreds by now. Usually they liked doing them but there were times when all of the guys thought that it was such a drag and that they would do anything to skip it. Yet there was little or no chance for this since Johnny, Donna and Lou held them in a tight grip. It was their obligation and there would be no excuses. The work had to be done!

They were whisked backstage behind the sports arena where they were supposed to wait until the contestants arrived.

Brian who was in a very good mood was playing along with the camera crew. He was making goofy faces and pretending to be a reporter, commenting on everything while they were waiting for the fans.

Holding up a brush as a fake mic he went on. "We�re backstage, waiting for twenty-five lucky or unlucky," he grinned, "winners to meet us." He made a face, "Poor them!"

Kevin, who was standing talking to Johnny looked displeased at Brian who in his thoughts was making a complete fool of himself. But then what else was new about his cousin? There were times when the older guy seriously wondered how old his cousin really was. He could be so immature that it wasn�t even funny.

Howie, always with a smile on his lips, walked up from behind Brian's back, "What are you standing here lying about?" He grinned.

Immediately the Kentuckian pulled up the thread. "Me lying?" He looked innocent. "I never lie," he grinned to the camera, "Do I?"

He got no answer since a loud sigh broke the silence. It was Nick standing there, looking all forlorn. Walking up to him Brian placed an arm on his friends shoulder just to be shrugged away seconds later. "What's the matter buddy?"

"Nothing." Nick looked really miserable.

Brian, who sensed that something was the matter but couldn�t pin point it spotted the camera following him and then quickly decided to play it off. "I mean what is the matter with you..wearing that ugly cap." He hit slightly towards Nicks head and the teen blushed.

"It�s cold out there!" The tone was a bit whiny.

"Yeah it sure is buddy." Not wanting to embarrass the teen anymore Brian walked away, the camera following him and then he started to do an impression of Donald Duck. All to satisfy the fans.

As soon as the camera was out of vision AJ walked straight up to his friend. "You�re freezing?"

The teen shrugged.

"Because if you are..it�s weird since we�re inside if you haven�t noticed." He shook his head. "B is right. Where did you dig up that ugly cap?"

"Howie's grandma."

"D�s grandma? The kid had to be worse off then he said. "What does she have to do with anything?" He frowned. "You sure you�re alright? You look like you are about to kneel over any sec."

"I said I was fine. 'kay?" Nick mumbled, not sounding too convincing Holding up a hand, AJ continued. "Chill man..you don�t have to bite my head off or anything. I�m just asking."

"Well don�t."

The rebel sighed. Everybody was so testy these days. He couldn�t ask a simple question or they would jump on each others throat. Maybe the jetlag was shredding its victims.

"Stop talking so much nonsense. The fans are waiting." It was Kevin coming to the scene.

What was the matter with him? AJ was about to say something back when Brian cut in with a laugh. "Ai Ai Captain." He saluted his cousin who shook his head, disgusted.

"Sometimes I wonder how old you are. I really think we have enough babies in this group." He pointed at Nick who looked like he was spacing out.

"You don�t have to be mean Kevin" Howie was coming to Nick's defense. "That was uncalled for."

"Really?" Kevin sneered, "Well look at him. He�s just standing there, looking like a moron! Not paying any attention" The older man sighed, "as usual."

"Knock it off." AJ said, feeling like he had to defend the kid, even if he had been sneered at seconds ago. "Nick isn�t feeling alright." The teen looked positively pale.

"I�m fine." He was talking slow and careful like it really hurt to talk. Closing his eyes he looked like he was doing his best to gather strength.

"No you�re not. You told me you have a hea..." Howie was cut off with Sonia coming into the room, sounding excited. "The fans are here now and they are waiting!"

Instantly the guys stopped their bickering and instead turned their attention to the door that opened and twenty-five lucky fans that were looking forward to meet their idols came into the room. For 45 minutes the guys did their best to meet their demands and write autographs, taking picture as well as make some small talk.

A while later, after all the fans had left the room they had a short break to relax before it was time to hit the stage.

"Wow that was awesome," Howie commented as he grabbed his water bottle, took a swag swallowing it down.

"Yeah," AJ agreed, "Did you see that blonde? She sure was a prize winner." The both friends laughed.

Brian grabbed a water bottle, sitting down next to Nick on the couch. "You want some?" Holding out his bottle he offered a taste. the teen shook his head. "No?" Surprise could be heard in the young mans voice. "How come? You look like you�re about to melt away."

"I have my own..thanks." He gestured towards the bottle on the floor. Brian noticed that whenever Nick talked it sounded like he was putting on a lot of strain to get the words out and he appeared completely drained. He was also constantly wiping the sweat that poured down his temples off with his sleeve. "God it�s warm here," he complained, looking like he was about to melt away.

"No wonder," Kevin muttered. " Take off that cap and you�ll feel better."

The teen mumbled something but did as his friend suggested only to reveal a serious case of bedhair!

"God Nicky you look like apeshit!" AJ commented with a grin. "Put on that ugly cap again or find a comb!"

The guys laughed which had their friend blushing.

"M�sorry."

Handing him the brush that Brian had pretended earlier to be the mic, Johnny said with a sigh, "Here..try and straighten that mess out." Accepting it with an apologetical glance Nick did his best to get his hair too look presentable. But it was a futile try since the hair looked just as bad as he felt and that wouldn�t say little.

Suddenly Sonia barged into the room. "The sound equipment is fixed and there are hundreds of fans, waiting and screaming for you to come onstage."

The guys draw back a breath. They had no idea that so many had come to see them.

"Are you guys ready?" she asked with a smile, before counting down, "three..two...One.."

And off they went.

****************************************************************************************************************************************************************** "Wow," AJ uttered in amazement. He�d heard that they were big in Canada but had no idea that they were THIS big. The sports arena was packed with hundreds of fans waiting for them to perform. You might think that it was a full concert and not a performance of two maybe three songs. The fans cheered loudly, shouting their names and when the guys came into view the screams were so loud that it was almost deafening. "Damn this is wild."

Both Kevin and Howie nodded in agreement as they were taking their seats on the small barstools on the stage. Looking out to the crowed he noticed that the fans had taken their time to write large signs that said "I love the Backstreet Boys" and was filled with painted hearts as well as signs like "Love U Nick" or "I wanna have you AJ! Tonight!"

He grinned at that text. The girl that was holding the sign had a tight sexy top and long hair and if he hadn�t been so involved in a relationship with his Amanda he would have asked her backstage.

Lots of camera flashes went on as they sat down on the seats and AJ who was sitting next to Nick could see that his friend was blinking rapidly towards the flashes and the light. For a moment AJ thought that it actually looked like it was hurting his eyes. He opened his mouth to ask if something was wrong when Sonia came on the stage in a mission to present them.

"I am very honored to present to you.."

Screams interrupted her words as she smiled and did another attempt. "I said I�m very honored to present to you.." Brief pause, "five special guys all the way from the United States..." Another pause while the fans were screaming their heads off. She laughed and AJ tensed. "Here are the BACKSTREEET BOYYYYSSSSS!!!"

If the fans had made a noise in the beginning it was nothing compared to what they were making now. They were totally ecstatic and the applause seemed never to want to stop.

AJ grinned.

This was what he lived for. Doing concerts, meeting the fans, making other people happy. He was a performer. Loved singing and dancing and meeting the fans. He�d been once described in a magazine for being the most sociable one as well as a ladies man. The first was something he could agree upon since he loved going out there, feeling the pulse and entertaining people.

AJ was the first to grab the mic. "Heeelllooooo Quebeeecccc," he shouted at them, getting lots of screams back. "Are youuuu guuuys doiiing allrigghhttt?"

"YESSSSS!!!" The fans screamed so loud that AJ was certain that his eardrums would popp. "We loooooveee youuuuuuu!!!"

Grinning widely at them he added, "That is great. Cause we love you tooo."

Those last words made a real success. The fans were getting wilder by the moment. If it was like this in an ordinary sports arena at daytime what would it be like at tomorrow evening's concert? AJ could only speculate. That and hope that it would be just as crazy, if not crazier.

Brian, who was in a very good mood after winning the "French language contest" grabbed his mic too. "Hey there," he said, smiling in the way that only he could do. The girls squealed in delight. "I�m B'rok and I just wanna tell you that we�re so happy to be finally touring here in Canada." He paused briefly, waiting for the worst screaming to die down. "And to be with you!"

There was no limit to the girls excitement.

"I LOVE YOU BRIAN!!!" The screams for him were endless.

Then it was Howie's turn to present himself, "Hi I�m Howie D!" he said with a large smile as if it wasn�t enough he added in French that he loved them. The success was a fact.

Kevin made the fans scream too and AJ grinned as one girl yelled loudly, "I wanna have sex with you Kevin." She was quickly escorted out of the arena by two guards. This was a family show and it was not only teenage girls present. There were a few older fans too.

Nick was on next.

AJ watched as his friend grab the mic, almost in slow-motion. His mere presence made the girls scream like crazy and there was no doubt who was the most popular of the five. But Nick didn�t look as appreciative over the riot he was causing. Instead he saw that the teen appeared to be wincing, looking very uncomfortable over the loud sounds. It was probably that headache that Nick had complained about earlier that was making itself reminded. Not that AJ thought it was weird since it was loud enough to get him a migraine, even if he wasn�t prone to them at all.

It was chaotic.

"I�m Nick!" His voice was hoarse but that didn�t matter since the girls would outvoice anything he said anyway. AJ noticed that sweat was pearling on his forehead and the pale almost green shimmer on his complexion made him think that something had to be seriously wrong with this guy. He looked like hell and it couldn�t just be jetlag, headache or pure exhaustion. His friend probably caught some kind of bug to look like that. Whatever it was he intended to find out as soon as he got a short moment with Nick.

AJ decided that as shitty as he looked he didn�t belong on a stage nor less in front of hundreds of people and he should go back to the hotel and get some rest instead. That was usually the only way to kick an upcoming virus like this. Looking at the teen he noticed that he had plastered a forced smile on his lips and the way his eyes went back and forth it was clear that he was thinking of something to say to the crowed. They had slowed down a knot, waiting for the hunk to say something more.

"Uh..eh.." Nick stuttered before adding, "Love you guys!"

That was enough to make the room lift an inch. The noise was unbearable and silently AJ wondered why the girls were acting like this when it was Nick that entered the scene. It was almost like they were frantic.

Brian most have thought that it was time to start the show since as soon as Nick had went back to silence again he�d taken up the cue and they sang "I�ll never break your heart." Acapella.

The song was met with loud applause. The fans loved them.

Next song that they played was "I�ll go anywhere for you." And this time they were performing it not sitting down. Catching a glance he noticed that Nick was just standing there, looking like he was doing his best to focus on the crowd out there. He seemed dizzy and after first dismissing the thought he saw how his friend swayed a bit, like he was unsteady on his feet.

Shit! The kid was about to pass out.

Sweat poured down his forehead and he looked ghostly pale. AJ�s first thought was to call upon the attention to either Kevin or Brian but they were in the middle of a song and he had to find another way out of this. Looking at his friend he saw that Nick was doing his best to stand up straight and without thinking he walked up to the kid, placing an arm around his shoulder and neck in an attempt to make it look buddy like. First he didn�t know how his friend would react to such gesture but then he thought 'Fuck it!' After all he had to do something. The action was met by surprise but nothing was being done to shrug his comforting arm away, instead Nick seemed to lean closer to him, like in support and he could feel the heat through his clothes.

Damn the kid was running a fever.

Why hadn�t he told anyone that he was feeling this crappy? He had no business being on stage looking like this and if AJ had been the one with the power he would have forced Nick back to the hotel for some rest. But since he had no such power for doing something like that since it was Johnny and Lou that made the calls, he had to shut up and pretend that all was fine and dandy. One look at Nick told him that he wasn�t. Not at all.

Spotting Kevin's frown he neglected it swiftly. For the time being the teen needed the support and only when AJ was sure that his friend felt a bit better he moved his arm and then returned back to his place, trying to make it sound like it was part of the show routine

"Thanks." The blonde whispered silently before turning back to his position again.

"No prob." He did his best to act like it had been nothing even if he hated to admit that the kid got him a bit concerned. Luckily the rest of the song went out without a hitch.

The next song they were supposed to perform was "We�ve got it going on." It had lots of dance routines in it and AJ feared that it would be a bit too hard for Nick to keep up with. With that on his mind he tried to get Kevin's or Brian's attention to tell them that maybe they should skip that part. But the two cousins were much too busy joking with each other as well as responsing to the crowd's cheering. With a sigh he could do nothing but hope for the best.

During the performance AJ caught a nervous glance at Nick who was doing his best to keep up with he dance routines. He was sweating profusely and there was a green tint on his cheeks.

Adding more misery to the situation the fans were allowed to ask questions to the guys, but due to running a bit late on schedule they were only allowed to ask one question to each member. AJ got asked if he was dating someone.

"Not right now." He flat out lied. "But I have been dating girls in the past." He also added some sappy reply about how he loved girls and so on. Johnny seemed at least pleased with his answer since there was an untold rule never to tell anything about girlfriends. That could cause unwanted publicity as well as cut down the record sales if it was revealed that some of the guys were already taken.

Kevin's question where how they met and with perfection he told the fans how they had met and how they had done the first concert.

Brian was asked about his heart problem and Howie was asked about what his favorite candy was. "Gummy bears" was the Latinos response without hesitation. This caused a scream in the audience and with many words the Latino started to tell about one time in Germany when he received a really big box filled with Gummy bears and how they had stuffed their mouths with that goodie.

Nick was asked, as usual, how he liked being the youngest Backstreet boy and his reply was short. "Great!." There was no emotion in his words and AJ could see Kevin frowning at that reply. When the teen said nothing more Sonia concluded that the time for questioning as well as the show was over

"See you all at the concert tomorrow night!" The guys yelled, waving with their hands before they left the stage.

There was loud screaming from the auditorium as Sonia was lotting out tickets to the otherwise sold out concert. Ten lucky fans became the winners and they would all get to meet the guys backstage at tomorrow nights concert.

Once backstage AJ couldn�t help it but he felt relieved. The thought of having to endure another half an hour on this hot stage didn�t sound too promising. Especially not for Nick who seemed uncomfortable enough.

"Ok Nickolas what the heck was that all about?" Kevin questioned the blonde as soon as they were out of view from the fans and audience.

"What?" Nick wiped away the sweat from his forehead.

"You not talking or anything..are you mute or something?" The tall man spat, clearly annoyed.

"No."

Noticing the start of an argument AJ jumped in. "Leave him alone Train. He�s tired and isn't feeling so great."

"We�re all tired," Kevin sneered, "That�s no excuse for behaving indecent." Kevin was in a mood. "It�s just bullshit. All Nick wants do these days is try to find the easier way out. Don�t think that I didn�t hear that you snapped to some girls when we were supposed to sign autographs." There was hostility in his voice.

The teen looked blankly at him.

"Is that true?" Brian asked a bit surprised. "When did this happen?"

Nick had no chance answering since Kevin cut in. "Outside the resturant..earlier on."

"Ok." Turning to the exhausted blonde his friend asked, "Did you refuse to sign autographs? Is Kev telling the truth?"

"No." Nick shook his head but they could tell he was lying. "I was..eh..a bit tired and cold and needed to get into the bus." This was part true. "Anyway since they didn�t push on or anything I went into the bus. But..but I didn�t snap at them!"

"That wasn�t what they told me." Kevin set his eyes into the blonde who shifted nervously. "You talked to them?" He swallowed hard, looking like he wanted out of the room.

"Yes. They told me that you have been rude to them and you know what Johnny and Lou" there was a threat in the older boys tone, "think of that kind of behavior"

Nick swallowed hard.

"Leave it Kev." Brian said with a sigh, thinking that his cousin was being a bit to hard on the kid.

"No." Kevin shook his head. "The kid needs to learn that not everyone is going after his plans."

"Big fucking deal." AJ suddenly snarled. "So if he told some girls off..I bet they were kind of rude anyway. Chill out man."

To Nick's surprise none other than Alexander James McLean was coming to his defense

Kevin snapped. "Don�t YOU tell me what to do. Besides this is between me and Nicky. You have no business butting into it." He looked sternly at AJ before adding, "And what the hell was all that about out there..when we were performing?"

"What the hell was what about?" AJ bit back.

"You holding an arm around Nick's shoulder, neck. That wasn�t in the dance routine." Kevin was such a perfectionist.

"Jeeze Train. Knock it off!" AJ was starting to get annoyed over the way he was being criticized. It was uncalled for.

"It looked a bit weird." Brian agreed.

"Don�t you mean gay" Kevin mumbled.

Annoyed over that kind of comment AJ snarled, "You�re the one that should talk about being gay? I�m not the one that borrows my mom's skirt."

"Watch it boy." Kevin was getting mad. "You better work on that attitude since you�re seriously pissing me off."

"Everything is pissing you off these days." Nick mumbled quietly just to be met with a hard glare from his friend.

"Like you�re the one to talk. At least I spend some time with the fans while you always try to find the easier way out."

"Right!"

"Are you mouthing off?" Now Kevin was getting seriously mad.

The blonde shook his head.

"Good."

Things were getting a bit tense and Brian had a habit to leave the room when it heated up. Instead AJ came to the blondes rescue. "If you haven�t noticed something is off with Nick today." The teen frowned upon hearing those words but the rebel ignored it.

"So? Something is always off with that kid. Damn he always acts like a baby." Kevin muttered, not taking any consideration that the teen was standing next to him, looking like he wanted to sink through a hole in the ground.

This was starting to get ugly. It was so unlike the oldest member to be so pissy that AJ started to wonder if something had happened over the break. "Dude you sure are testy today," he said, not taking notice over the nasty things coming out of the older boys mouth. "Something happen?"

"Nothing happened beside I have to baby sit you guys!" Kevin was in no mood for talking.

"Ouch!" the rebel pretended to get burned. "I can detect some hostile feelings here. What�s the matter? You didn�t score anything on the break?" He was referring to Kevin's long time on and off girlfriend Kristin.

"That�s none of your business."

AJ had hit a sore spot.

"Don�t you know Kev that a guy needs to get it on from time to time or he will wither away?" He was trying to make a joke in hopes to get his friend to cheer up a bit and laugh at the situation.

But nothing like that happened. Instead Kevin snarled, "If I were you I would watch what I was saying."

Surprised over this sudden take in the conversation AJ felt confused. "Dude what is wrong?"

For a moment it looked like Kevin was about to say what was on his mind when Howie came into the room, and instead he muttered something about having to stay with a bunch of children.

"Sorry to interrupt you all," Howie said, panting like he�d been in a hurry. "But I�ve talked to Johnny and Sonia and we have to get back to the hotel again. You know to do those interviews.

A loud sigh could be heard in the room.

Even if the small performance had been a success the early hours and the flight was starting to take a toll of their bodies. They hadn�t had a chance to check into their hotel rooms since the schedule had been non stop ever since they arrived in Canada. It was quickly starting to become a tad too much and on top of it all they were no where near finished for today.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 9

"Describe to me that very first time the Backstreet Boys got up on stage. You had to perform that first number together. What was it right before you guys got up on stage? What did you say to each other?" Sonia asked, sitting on the bed next to Brian.

"Oh Lordy help us," Howie said with a light girlish tone, looking up to the ceiling, in a lame attempt to make a joke.

"Good luck Ajee, " Kevin filled in and all but Nick fell different comments of what could have been said. One crazier then the other. When the comments and jokes finally died down Brian was the only one that felt compelled to tell what had went on that historical time.

"It was a night of us people rocking the house, you know." He itched his nose. "It was the 8th of may 1993. I remember the day. And.." He looked dreamily to his side, "and we were all grouped up and saying a prayer and it was like be with us and lets rock this house and bring it out there. And we were only on stage for let�s say," he thought for a second, "fifteen minutes. Tops. But it was just...just unbelievable"

"Aha." Sonia was following the story while the rest of the guys pretended to be interested. "Did you know then that something was happening with the magic, the chemistry and that something would come out of it?" She was still turning towards Brian who seemed the only one willing to talk about the event. "Did you feel it?"

"You know Brian actually knew that it would be valid. And that it would work." AJ cut into the conversation.

"Thank you man." The Kentuckian smiled widely, looking up at his friend who grinned back.

"No prob." They slapped each others hands in commitment.

"What was the song that you were singing before you actually got written material?" Sonia wanted to know as the next question.

Funny memories popped up into Brian's head and smiling he turned towards Nick in a hope that they would laugh to the crazy songs that they had been singing. To his surprise the teen showed no interest what so ever and he looked blankly at him. Brian held his eyes on Nick for a moment and as Howie started to tell about how they did acapella he moved his eyes back to his friend again. Just to notice that the teen wasn�t smiling at all and that he looked more dead than alive where he was sitting. This had Brian come to the conclusion that something had to be really off with the kid since laughter was usually just around the corner, especially when issues like this were being brought up.

"Like what?" Sonia asked and when the camera scanned into Howie he mouthed a "You�re ok?" to Nick who responded not with a nod but a headashake. This sudden change in behavior had Brian a bit concerned and no more than ever he wished for the interview to end soon, if not for his but Nick's sake. The teen looked positively ghostly.

"What did you start with..any song. What song?" Sonia wanted to know and Kevin was the one to respond to that. He talked about different covers they had done and after the long and a bit boring information had been told Sonia asked them if they could sing one of their songs. Acapella.

Since they were used to singing at the drop of a dime they instantly started to sing a song where Nick had the lead. Brian was the only one that could hear what a strain it was for Nick to sing that high of a tone and in the whole the kid pulled it off pretty good. At least for someone that looked ready to make a call to the porcelain phone.

"Stuff like that," AJ added when they were done with the song. Brian noticed that Nick fell into the rebels lap giggling like he was embarrassed and for a second he felt relieved. That was something that wasn�t out of the ordinary. Not saying anything however was. AJ patted him on the head like he was making sure that Nick was alright.

Brian smiled. AJ and Nick could be such enemies but they could also be such good friends. Like brothers.

"We�ve started doing local stuff you know before we started writing our own material. You know like with the producers in Orlando." Kevin explained. "You know we�re ready to get our record deal.

"Aha." Sonia nodded, she was completely into the interview which couldn�t be said the same for Nick. Once again Brian noticed that the teen was spacing out again and he desperately wished that there wouldn�t be any questions asked to him since the kid had a habit of making a fool of himself. And then wound up being embarrassed

Kevin was the one that seemed a bit annoyed at Nick and when the teen hadn�t answered a question about what he felt about touring Brian noticed how his cousin hit him on his leg, snarling, "Pay attention."

This didn�t go unheard from Johnny who yelled from his side. "Cut. You can�t use that."

A bit surprised over the sudden break they all looked at the black manager who apologized, "Sorry I thought that something was in the way..you know of the picture."

Brian knew better. It was a lie. A cover up so the fans wouldn�t see how short tempered their calm and reasonable Kevin Richardson could be. Therefore Mr. Wright had butt into the situation. Saving it all. Smart move, Brian had to give him that, even if he wasn�t too fond of Mr. Wright and his tactics.

Sonia seemed a bit annoyed. "Can I continue?"

Jaques nodded and she was out with the next question. "You�re doing this alone. Did you think you wouldl be able to do it with same result if it was each and everyone of you?"

Howie, who like Brian, seemed to be on the edge of answering questions picked this one. "No," he shook his head, "No it wouldn�t be the spark and energy and all that. It�s like..we�re all very talented individuals but it wouldn�t be the same, because when we come together as a group it comes to that you know.." He was cut off by AJ who continued.

"It�s the choreography too. When you�re on yourself you got no one to respond to and you have to build up all your energy by yourself onstage." He gestured with his hands how they would circulate. "When you�re together you have a more important role and can build up the energy together and.."

Brian wasn�t listening anymore instead he was concentrating on Nick who was rubbing his temples furiously, swallowing hard. "How does your private life effect you as a popstar?"

"We try to live a normal, you know, every day life. But we�re not with our family as much as we used to be. But you know we kind of put our goal into it and relationships has to come aside but right now our schedules are so hectic. We really don't have time to settle down..you know start a relationship with anybody."

Brian smiled. Howie was really on a roll today. He however was starting to get tired since the jetlag had kicked in and now he was happy that he had chosen the bed, even though a quick glance at Nick told him that his younger friend would need it more.

"We all knew about this when we came into it," Howie continued and Brian could do nothing but nod. That part was true. But what they didn�t know was how hard the business would be. How many sleepless nights and tight schedules that were on the verge of sending them all over the edge.

"We all knew about what sacrifices we had to make.." Howie said just to be interrupted by Kevin in the back.

"But we�re not whining. We love what we�re doin'"

Brian grinned inwardly. If there was one thing his cousin hated it was when someone was whining. Especially if that one person happened to be named Nickolas Gene Carter. Today, however he hadn�t seen much of that which was strange since Nick had a habit of whining whenever things were going a bit rough. Maybe he was too tired to even do so.

"So there is another side of the coin too?" Sonia asked.

"Yes, Nick and I," AJ pointed at his friend who was sitting there, hands folds over his knees, not saying anything and not even looking at the rest of them. "had to sacrifice school. And Brian couldn�t really Finish high school, not quitting in a way but be away from it and instead we have to have tutors and.."

Brian felt it was best he was clearing out stuff since it sounded like none of them actually wanted to go to school. "I didn�t drop out or anything..it�s just that we had too much.. you know..the touring was taking up too much space."

They were talking a bit about how it felt watching their other friends go to school proms and sports games while they had to rehearse. Suddenly Kevin drew back his breath like he had something important to say. They all turned towards him.

"I think," the oldest member started, "that in this interview Nick has been really talking too much." He laughed afterwards a bit sarcastic and there was an Ohhhh sound going through the whole room.

Brian picked his nails. His cousin could be such a bastard and that was really uncalled for.

Howie was the only one that laughed, a bit embarrassed over the sudden outburst. AJ didn�t look too pleased and Sonia was caught off the act too.

"I think..I think," she stuttered, looking at Nick who sat there, taking in the rude words his brother just spilled to him. He had a smug smile on his lips but he didn�t comment or anything. This too was a bit off the picture with Nick cause he was usually the one to comment if he was being teased. At least giving a snide remark back or a slap on the offenders head. Sometimes he also pretended to walk out of the room which the reporters usually thought was soooo cute.

"He�s a bit rude..eh?"

Kevin who most have realized that what he said was a bit too much did his best to lighten it up, "He needs to be sacrificed." No one laughed at this, instead there was a bit of a tense situation.

"No, I noticed..you know what I noticed." Sonia was trying to save the whole interview. "I�ve noticed that you are a good listener. Are you normally a good listener? Do you like to listen?"

Brian looked up at the teen that sat there, not moving like a statue, his arms still folded over his legs like he was cold or something. There were no feelings revealed what he thought about being spited like that all he showed was being tired. Tired and silent.

"I listen. Since these guys are older than me I like to listen to them and learn."

He was very soft-spoken and Brian could tell that he had a hard time figuring out what to say. There were red blotches on his cheeks that hadn�t been there before and Brian was more and more thinking that the kid could be running a temp. That would be so much like Nick to be caught with a bug or a germ in the most unwanted situations. Like when they were touring.

"Uhumm."

There was silence in the room as Nick uttered the words then they all started to laugh, especially Kevin. Nick had done it again. He had found the right words and by that saved a rather embarrassed situation for all parts. Brian had to give him that the kid could be pretty smart when he wanted to. Usually not by intention but still..

Kevin slapped his hand in truce. Nick smiled too at what he�d been saying even if it was a bit forced.

"Aww come on guys..give him a break." The older woman was coming to the teens defense and as the laughter died down she asked the next question. "What have you learned from one of the guys? What's important to yo`? What do you carry with you wherever you go?"

Brian shifted on his bed. This would be interesting to hear what Nick said about it. How he managed to get out of the situation.

"Name something specific, something that one of the guys taught you, a lesson in life that�s just been given to you. A piece of advice."

Out of the corner of his eye Brian spotted AJ waving in front of Nick like he was making sure that the teen was listening but then he noticed that he was making a gesture to Johnny that was standing next to him. It was like he was given out a signal that something was either wrong or that he had the situation under control. Which it was Brian had no idea.

"They all just..they all just give good advice." The camera panned in on Nick, a close up, as he continued with a weak, faltering voice. "All the time..they..you know..tell me the right things and you know lead me in the right direction and.." Nick looked at AJ who was giving him support by nodding. "I think we�re all very close and I love these guys."

Not an eye was dry once Nick ended his speech.

As the camera panned away and Jaques turned it off, the guys were all laughing at Nick. What he�d said was true but at the same time it was a bit embarrassing to hear, especially since they were all teasing him. Brian, who was Nick's closest friend played out an act.

"Awww," he joked, pretending to wipe a tear out of his eyes, "that was the most beautiful thing that I�ve ever heard," he grinned behind the fake tears. "I am sooooo touched."

"Dick!" Nick yelled back when Brian very dramatically pretended to faint.

Sonia wasn�t laughing. "Come on guys. That was very nice said, wasn�t it?" Turning to Nick she continued, "Don�t pay attention to them. They just want to be able to express their feelings like you can do."

This had the guys laughing even more.

"I need a good ending," Jaques said after they had calmed down. "Can one of you guys do something funny?" Before he had a chance to ask again Sonia said, "Yes, Nick?"

The teen didn�t have to be asked twice and he jumped on the bed in an attempt to lie down while Brian attacked him, tickling him like crazy. Howie responded by rubbing a pillow over his friends head. Nick was giggling but at the same time begged them to stop.

Brian, who had forgotten all about how off Nick had been all day, had no such intention instead he tickled much harder.

"No stop it!" Nick yelled under the pillow that Howie was smothering him under.

"Not until you say mercy," Brian grinned, not showing any signs to stop.

"Stooop itttt!" Nick giggled, squirming like a worm on a hook.

"Say mercy!" So they went on and off for a while due to the fact that it was quickly becoming a game of willpower. Then when Brian thought that Nick would never say the codeword he heard a small mercy underneath the pillow.

Lifting it up he saw Nick's red face staring back at him and was instantly met with concern. "You alright?"

"No." Nick shook his head. "I have a bad headache"

"A headache?" Brian repeated, surprised over the sudden revelation. Laying his hand on the blonde's forehead he was met with the heat before he even touched the skin. What he felt had him all concerned. Nick was burning hot with fever. "Man!" Making a face he looked at his side only to be met with Kevin's eyes. The grimace that he gave said it all. The teen was sick.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 10

The splitting headache was ready to kill him! It felt like a sledge hammer was placed inside his skull and every time he moved or breathed, it would pound the living shit out of him. It was worse than those migraine attacks he�d suffered from time to time and that would say much. The past hour, when they had to endure a very stupid photo shoot consisting of the guys laying in bed bare breasted with Sonia beside them dressed in something sexy, had finally come to an end. Sonia had asked them to do both this and that and it had felt weird having to lay on a bed next to someone that was old enough to be your mother. As if that wasn�t bad enough the bright lights from the camera hurt his eyes very much and every movement made his head go into a total spin. In the end he had no other choice but to block the light with his hand when they were not taking any pictures. It was making him both sweaty and nauseous. Strangely his neck was pretty sore too and at first he thought it might have something to do with the way he�d been sleeping, resting, on the plane. Whatever it was it felt like an eternity before they could get out of the hotel room and go down to the lobby to get their keys and get checked in.

And here he was, waiting for Brian that was standing by the reception desk, waiting to get their room number. He was going to room in with the Kentuckian tonight which suited him just fine. His friend had a habit of being funny and taking light into situations but also wasn�t afraid to add some seriousness too. At first, when it was clear that Nick wasn�t feeling well, Kevin had been his designated room mate and for a couple of dark minutes it looked like he had to share his room with his bossy brother. Then when Nick was sure that no one came to his rescue and settled in for a couple of lousy nights Brian had told him that he could trade places with Kevin and he as well as Mr. Richardson looked mighty happy at the suggestion. Spending time with Brian it was like being with his best friend. Kevin had once joked in an interview that if Brian was going to jump off a cliff he, Nick, would follow too. At first Nick had laughed it off, but deep inside he knew that he was telling the truth. That was how much Brian meant to him.

"You holding up?"

Brian's soft voice cut through his thoughts and Nick raised his head towards him. He�d been sitting on the sofa in the lobby, waiting for them to get the keys to their room, and during that time he�d practically dosed off. "Mmmm." There was no strength for more words.

"You sure?" The older boy didn�t look like he believed him.

"Mmm.." Nick did his best not to move his head too much."You got the keys?"

"Yup. Fifteenth floor. Room 1542." Brian waved with his keycard. "Come on lets get going." He gestured towards Nick's backpack. "Don�t forget to bring that one too."

"And my suitcase?"

"No idea." Brian shrugged. "But Johnny said he was taking care of it so I�m guessing they will bring it up to our room."

"Ok." Nick made a move to stand when a wave of dizziness hit him hard. Holding his head down he tried to clear his head and looking up he noticed Brian looking at him.

"You all right?" There was genuine concern in his friends voice.

"Mmm.. just a bit dizzy, that�s all." He nodded slightly, "I think I stood up a little too fast."

"Maybe." Brian snickered, not believing him. A frown was etched on his forehead. "Is your headache that bad? You want me to talk to Kev? To Johnny? You want us to call for someone? Like a doctor?"

"NO!" Nick rose his voice a bit too loud and he winced at the impact it did to his sore ears. "No. I don�t need a doctor. I�m probably just a bit jetlagg ed. That�s all."

"Jetlag doesn�t give you a fever." Brian wasn�t about to give up his way in trying to get Nick to seek medical help. "You sure that you don�t want Johnny to call for someone. You know. Just in case?"

"I said no. I�m better now anyway." He forced a smile that more came out like a grimace. Taking a deep breath he picked up his backpack and then moved towards the elevators. Every step hurt so much that he had to bit back a groan. Brian followed closely behind dragging his bag with him. He wanted so desperately to get to his room and lay down, sleep and maybe, just maybe, this headache would disappear.

The elevator ride was a bad choice. The moment Brian pressed on the buttons and as they started to go up he felt his stomach do a somersault. Every movement today made him feel dizzy and sick and the glass elevator where you could see down to the lobby didn�t help matters much. Closing his eyes he willed his stomach to stay put, but it was a hard task and he had to swallow repeatedly. 'God, why do we have to live on the fifteenth floor?' Nick thought miserably. Brian was eyeing him carefully all the way and when he thought he couldn�t take it anymore and was ready to slid down on the floor he felt Brian's firm grip on his arm.

"It�s our floor. Let�s go." Not daring to open his eyes he was more or less guided out of the car and it was only when he was on safe ground that he opened his eyes. Brian stood there, looking at him. "Jeeze Frack. How bad are you really? You feel that sick?"

Not answering Nick felt that for the time being it would be wise not to open his mouth and instead he walked slowly down the hall, hoping that Brian would get the picture and then hurry towards their room. Swallowing hard he prayed that the nauseous feeling would go back and he wouldn�t have to redecorate the hallway with a violent gastric display. It would be much too nasty. Brian, being a psychic, must have sensed that his friend was in a bit of a hurry and therefore quickly walked down the corridor, hoping that he would find the room before there was an accident in the hallway. 'Please hurry' Nick thought desperately, tagging along. Biting his lip he made an attempt to diverse the pain to some other area and also taking his mind off his churning stomach. He pressed his hand against his stomach, hoping to calm it down in the process. When he was certain that he couldn�t take it anymore, either by passing out or puking his guts out from the severe pain in his head, Brian announced that the door was open and Nick more or less stumbled into the room.

He hesitated if he would go to the bathroom or if he would lay down on one of the two beds in the room. Swallowing hard he decided the latter, even if he wasn�t sure that he would not have to go the bathroom any time soon. But it wasn�t as bad as it had been minutes ago. He flopped on the bed, face down, the moment his hot skin reached the cool and soft fabric of the bedspread, he closed his eyes. The nausea that had been building up during the afternoon was on the rebound when he was being able to lay down and wasn�t moving around all the time. The headache however was not any better and he desperately wished that he would be able to fall asleep so that he could feel better waking up again.

Brian followed him into the room. "I thought you were gonna barf," he said a bit surprised while flopping down on the other bed across the room.

"Me too." Nick muttered, his mouth against the bedspread.

"I�m glad you didn�t though." Brian smiled as he kicked off his shoes. "Man this feels good." Wafting on his toes he laid down on the bed. "I�m sooo beat." He continued to tell Nick about what he thought of the interview and the teen was listening, with half an ear. Not getting any real answers back,mostly groans, Brian asked, "You feel sick again? Is it your stomach too?"

"No, It�s just a headache. " The sixteen year old croaked out, a bit surprised over how weak he sounded. "A bad one."

"That stinks. Headaches sucks." His friend said as he he added in a jokingly way, "But you gotta admit it�s good that it�s THAT head," he pointed at Nick's skull, "and not your OTHER head." Normally the teen would have laughed at the joke, this time he show no emotion what so ever which had Brian even more concerned. "You want me to get you something? You know something for the pain? A Tylenol? Aspirin?"

Since it was much too strenuous to talk all Nick did was to respond with a groan.

"Does that mean that you want me to get you some? Or not?" Brian was by his side now. Putting a pillow over his head, trying to block away the light in the room, Nick mumbled that he just wanted to die. Either that or it was something in his appearance that caught his friend's attention since he could hear his friend picking up the phone calling to either Howie or Kevin to ask for some help. At first he did his best to try to hear what his friend was talking about but it was getting harder and harder to concentrate and the headache and the fever was starting to take its toll on his body.

He was dosing on and off and when a loud knock caught his attention he had no idea how long he�d been laying like this. Opening his eyes he found that it was dusk in the room and that Brian had pulled the blinds. It was good since every light hurt his head even more as well as made his eyes water. Quickly he closed his eyes again mainly because he didn�t have the strength to stay awake and dozed off all the time. There was a knock at the door. Glancing towards it Nick desperately willed that someone would open it since he was too tired and sick to move. Then there was another knock, this time louder and a male voice called out, "Brian? Nick? You there?"

Grunting Nick wished that whoever had come to visit them would stay the heck out of the room and as the voice repeated itself, "Come on open up," he felt like throwing a pillow against the door. If he only had the strength.

The sound of a toilet being flushed could be heard. "Hold on. I�m coming." Brian hurried over, opening the door.

"Where were you? What took you so long?" The male voice sounded annoyed.

"Jeeze Kev. I was in the can."

Brian opened the door letting his cousin into the room. They small talked a little and Nick could hear the words, "Nick..doing..sick," being asked. Inwardly he groaned. God couldn�t they be a bit more quiet? Didn�t they know he felt like hell?

"He�s asleep." Brian explained and then Nick heard his two friends coming his way. "I think he�s running a high fever too. He was also nauseous and I thought he was going to puke but he didn�t."

"Good for you that he didn�t."

"Yeah." Nick knew that Brian didn�t like it when someone was sick in that way around him and he was the most squeamish person in the group. The mere thought about one of the guys in that kind of predicament sent the Kentuckian gagging.

Kevin responded something and then sat down next to the teen, placing his hand on Nick's forehead. "Not good," he snickered. "He sure is hot."

'Well, thank you Kev' the teen thought, his mind all jumbled. 'I never knew you thought that about me.'

"Think it�s bad?" Brian sounded worried.

Nick groaned again, not listening to what Kevin was responding. How did he think he would feel? Of course it was bad. It felt like someone was hammering into his skull and his neck was so stiff that he had a hard time moving. Not that he wanted to move anyway. It would only set out another bout of nausea and puking wasn�t exactly on his list of things to do right now. The mere thought of having to stand with his head upside down had him wincing.

"When was the last time he got some pain pills?" Kevin asked. Brian must have shook his head since there was no comment. Nick felt it was best to tell his friends that all he got was the ones from Howie, after the photo shoot and that they had done nothing to lessen the pain he felt in his head. Rolling to his side he groaned, hoping to get their attention. "He�s up?" Kevin asked, then he turned to Nick. "You�re up buddy?" Another moan. It hurt so much to open his eyes now and as to top it all his neck felt strangely stiff too. He squinted at his friend since the fever made his eyes burn. "Hi kiddo." Kevin said softly, his eyes filled with concern. "How are you doing?" He felt his forehead again. "You�ve got yourself quite a fever buddy." There was a weak, but gentle smile on his lips.

Nick felt confused. Wasn�t this the same man that had been mad at him and then spited him in front of the camera? The thoughts were all jumbled and no matter how he tried he couldn�t get them to work properly. He blinked again. His vision was so blurry, no doubt from a fever.

"How are you feeling?" Now Brian was at his side too. His lips were so dry that he had a hard time talking. Licking them he opened his mouth to answer when another stabbing pain shot through his head. Instead he crumpled up, rolling into a ball. This action had his friends concerned. "What�s the matter Nick? Is it your stomach? Head?" They asked him all kinds of questions when all he wanted to do was to tell them to shut up. Yet he didn�t have the strength to do so and when the searing pain finally lessened a bit he looked up at them again.

"Do yo..you ha..have any mor..e pil..pills?" He stuttered his words since it hurt too much to talk.

"Yeah sure." Kevin patted at his pocket. Turning to Brian he ordered," B go and get me a glass of water to take with these." He rattled a bottle of Tylenol.

Soon Nick heard the sound of water running and before he knew it his friend was back with a glass of cold and fresh water. "Here you go." Brian handed it to him. Sitting up slowly in bed he did his best to grab it but his hands were shaking so much that he couldn�t hold it still. Instead he spilled on his t-shirt. Brian didn�t waste any time and instead he helped him to drink. Nick felt embarrassed. God, he was such a baby. But Brian didn�t care. "That�s it" he urged his friend as Nick drank a large gulp of water. It felt so good as the cold liquid ran down his throat. He wanted to devour the whole glass when Kevin stopped him. "No. That�s enough. You gotta take it easy on your stomach or you will get sick."

'I can�t be something I already am' Nick thought quietly but he could do nothing but accept.

Kevin shook out two white pills that he placed in the teen's palm. The water glass was back again and as he swallowed the pills he felt his strength faltering again. It was so cold in the room and suddenly he desperately wished that he was under the covers instead of laying here in just his tee. Helplessly he lied down again, shivering. "It�s cold here." he mumbled with clattering teeth.

"You�re freezing" It was more of a statement. Another nod, this time almost invisible since it hurt too much to move his head. "It�s his fever." Kevin explained like Brian had never been with a sick person before. Turning to the teen he asked, "You want us to help you get under the covers?"

Blushing a bit Nick mumbled. "Ye..yes please." He was very softspoken."

"You think you can stand up? Or do you need help?"

"I�ll try." He tried to sit up in the bed when the world went a bit blurry around his edges. God his head was fixing to explode now.

Brian was at his side again. "Can you take off your pants by yourself?"

Nick blushed. What did B'rok think of him? "YES!"

"Good," Brian grinned. "Cause I rather not undress you completly..at least not the boxers." He lauged.

Nick managed a weak smile. When he was done, only clad in boxers and a teen Kevin was going to help him to sit back again when suddenly everything started to sway, like he was on board a boat or a plane and his stomach was starting to do flip flops. The room was going into a serious spin and as everything, including himself, tilted dangerously he could feel the bile rise quickly in his throat. Moaning, he fumbled like a blind man, getting a hold on Kevin's shirt.

"Take it easy Nick. I�ve got you." Kevin whispered as Nick felt like he would topple over any second. Suddenly he felt his stomach start to heave and as the gagging started he could hear Kevin shouting in the background, "Go get a trashcan. He�s gonna blow!" Tears welled up in his eyes and as he desperately waited for a signal for his body to give in he held his mouth, doing his best to stall the upcoming event as long as possible. "Hold on kiddo." Kevin encouraged him while Brian rushed into the bathroom. It felt like an eternity, but it was probably not more than a few seconds, and he did his best to concentrate on something else but the sickness that was ready to swallow him. He knew he couldn�t hold it for much longer and Kevin's words, "You can let go now," felt like music to his ears. And that he did. Leaning over he made good use of the trashcan.

"Ewww." Brian was clearly disgusted over the offending sound. He cranked up the volume on the TV trying to block the unwanted noise.

"Turn that down," Kevin ordered while he was doing his best holding the teen up. "And don�t look if it bothers you."

With a face Brian turned off the TV, looking like he was about to toss his cookies himself.

"Brian if you think it�s so disgusting maybe you should leave the room" Kevin advised while rubbing Nick's back in smooth long circles. The teen was spewing loudly and it sounded like he was hacking up everything he had since he was a baby. Breastmilk included.

"No I can handle it" Brian mumbled with a strained voice.

"Ok, but don�t say that I didn�t warn you." Kevin snickered. Nick whimpered. It hurt so much when his stomach once again turned itself inside and out. This time more violent then the last.

Suddenly Brian felt like he couldn�t take it any longer. Standing up he shouted, "OH God it smells!" Gagging he rushed towards the window, cracking one of them open. "That�s better" he breathed through his nose as he sat down on the bed of the opposite side of the room. Brian Littrell didn�t do sick very well.

"Yes what did you think it would do?" Kevin chuckled from the other side of the room. "It doesn�t exactly smell like roses you know." Brian made a face back, but stayed in the room, even if it was taking him every ounce of mental strength to do so.

Nick wanted to cry. There couldn�t be anything worse than something like this. Every heave made his head go into total and unbearable pain and he didn�t know what to do anymore. Tears rolled down his face. Once he was done he was so exhausted that all he could do was shake and moan. Tears had filled his eyes, both from the tax but also from being miserable. He leaned against his older brother, too weak to do anything but sob. Kevin said nothing, just stroke his tousled hair. Brian was nowhere in sight.

"You better now?" the older man asked once Nick had stopped heaving. A short nod was returned as an answer. "Good." Talking to Brian he said, "Hand me that glass will ya." Nick could feel the glass being placed against his mouth and an encouraging, "Take a mouthful but don�t swallow," could be heard. "Just swish it around..that�s it." When he was finally being done he could feel Kevin help him to lay down again. This time under the covers. "Now try and get some rest and hopefully you feel better when you wake up," Kevin said, stroking his warm cheek with his hand.

Nick nodded. The headache was a bit better now when his stomach didn�t feel like it was doing hip hop any longer. Closing his eyes he felt like he could finally sleep and it felt actually pretty good now. In the background he could hear the two of them talking even if it was mostly a blurr.

"You gonna be all right with Nicky?" Kevin asked Brian while he put back the rinsed out trashcan by the bed.

"Yes." His answer was a bit hesitatent.

"You sure? Cause if you want I can trade rooms with you. Like we originally planned to do."

"No" Brian shook his head as he followed his cousin to the door. "We�ll be just fine."

"You know he can puke again.." A evil smile toyed at the older man's lips.

"Eww don�t remind me." Brian looked clearly disgusted. Then he added, "I said I�ll be fine. Don�t worry so much."

"Ok. If you say so..." His cousin sounded everything but relieved, " You know if there is something, if Nick is getting sick again." He looked sternly at Brian who winced at the thought, "just give me a call. Ok?"

"I�ll do that. Bye Kevin" Brian opened the door and just when he was about to close it, his cousin stuck his head in again "Oh I almost forgot. We have a promotion dinner tonight. Be down in the lobby seven sharp." Brian winced. This he had completely forgotten all about, especially with Nick being this sick.

Nick felt like crying. The dinner. It had really slipped his mind and the way he was feeling right now there was not a chance he would be able to attend one, and certainly not eat something. His stomach clenched, making sure that he knew that it was still very much alive.

"Oh shit! I forgot about that," Brian said tiredly. "What are we gonna do with Nick then? He�s too sick to go."

"I know."

"I can stay home with him." The younger man volunteered quickly.

'No' Nick thought desperately. He didn't want any of his friends having to sacrifice anything for him. To do charity.

Kevin sighed. "You could..I could.. but I don�t think that Johnny would agree to that."

"Well, screw him!" It was rare to hear the Kentuckian take those heated words into his mouth."We�ve gotta think something out. I�ll talk to Johnny and see what I can do. Ok?"

"'K. see ya." Brian closed the door with a deep sigh. Walking into the room he sat down on his bed and then turned on the TV with a low volume.

"B?"

"Nick you�re still awake? I thought you were asleep." Brian said a bit startled. "Is it the TV? The volume? It�s too loud? You want me to turn it down?" He fumbled with the remote controller. "You want another pill?"

"No."The teen mumbled. "I don�t think I can handle that right now." He rubbed his stomach.

"Yeah you�re probably right." The older boy made a face, suddenly getting reminded of the recent incident.

"I only wanted to let you know that I�ll be just fine."

Brian nodded, "Yeah, I�m sure it�s just a flu bug of some sort."

"Mmmm..probably but that�s not what I meant." Nick felt he had to tell his friends that they didn�t have to worry. He was a big boy and he could take care of himself, even if this last event had proved something else.

"Then what?"

"The dinner..I think you should go."

"No," Brian shook his head.

"You�re sick and I�ll stay with you." Nick smiled. "No offense B but you don�t do sick that well."

A chuckle. "I don�t?"

"No besides ..you know if I..you know I can�t promise that I won�t..." Nick sounded a bit embarressed.

"Won�t what?"

"Throw up."

"Oh." Brian let out a sound of disgust, "Urghh..Yuck." He scrunched up his nose.

"See. I knew it. You wouldn�t cope." Brian's bedside manner had to be worked upon.

There was a sigh. "If that happens then I will have to deal with it. Not you. That�s my problem. Anyway "He looked at Nick who was staring at him under his covers. "Don�t worry..I..you ..will be just fine and no matter what you are gonna say, I�m staying with you. Period." His voice firm. "Now try and get some sleep."

From past experience Nick knew that there was no use in arguing with his friend when he was in this kind of mood. Instead he pulled his blanket further up his chin and then mumbled a silent, "Thanks."

"Huh?..For what?" Brian sounded confused.

"For being there with me when..you know." Nick blushed. If it was from the fever or being embarrassed he had no idea, still a red tint rose on his cheeks.

"Oh that," Brian said casually. "That was Kev's doing." He chuckled lightly, "And Nick you�re right I don�t do sick that well." He paused. "But that doesn�t matter, you�re my bro and I�m taking care of you. No matter what..." He paused with a grin, " But I think I�ll leave the gory stuff to Kev."

Nick smiled. It felt so good that his brothers were there for him and he loved them for it.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 11

Kevin hesitated a second before knocking on his manager's door. Johnny Wright was a great guy still he never knew where he had him or what the result would be out of their conversation. There had been so many times in the past where Mr. Wright had told them one thing just to in reality prove to be something different, or changing his decision in the last minute. He also had a habit of making promises that were hard to keep since his head manager Mr. Lou Pearlman had the last word in everything. This time however Kevin hoped that Johnny was smart enough to make the right call. As he could hear the sounds of the manager walking towards the door he was gathering more and more strength. He was going to ask Johnny to let Nick off this dinner event and also that one of the guys would be able to stay with him. As things had been going with the teen there was no way that Kevin thought he could be left alone in the hotel room. Usually while touring Nick had a guardian with him, his mom, dad or uncle but this time he was left all alone. Mainly because this tour had happened rather fast and there was no one that could take the time to be with him.

It didn�t take long before the manager opened the door, holding a drink in his hand. "Kevin!" he uttered in surprise.

"Yeah..sorry to bother you but I need to talk to you about something" The tall man licked his lips nervously.

"Oh..Ok..come in." Johnny opened his door wide enough for the young man to pass through. Then he walked over to the TV and lowered the volume. "What was it you wanted to talk to me about?" Johnny sat down on the plush sofa and then gestured with his hand for his guest to sit down. Kevin did as he said and sat down on a chair, feeling like a fifth grader going to see the principal. Johnny must have sensed this as he offered, "You want something to drink? Scotch? Gin and tonic?"

"No thank you." Kevin shook his head.

"So what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" He stopped Kevin from saying anything by holding up a hand, "No let me guess..a certain blonde...sixteen old? Am I right?"

"Yes."

There was a deep sigh. "Allrigh. What did he do this time?" Johnny sipped on his drink while waiting for an answer.

"He�s not doing so good."

"Yeah I noticed that," the manager muttered. Looking at Kevin he offered once again, "You sure that I can�t tempt you with a drink?"

"Yes." Kevin felt a bit annoyed. The manager was constantly changing the subject. In an attempt to push the issue back to where it belonged he said, "Nick is running a really high fever. He is complaining over a terrible headache and he�s been throwing up." Drawing back his breath he continued. "I really don�t think he is fit to go anywhere tonight."

"Neither do I."

The words startled Kevin. This was NOT something he expected from the manager.

Johnny laughed, "Don�t look so shocked Richardson. I�m not an animal you know." Then he added, "As a matter of fact I�ve noticed too how bad the kid looked today and I�m not surprised that he�s caught the flu since I know its been going hard around the Tampa area." He paused, "And since there are many kids in the Carter family they are prone to pass it on to each other and apparently this time it was Nick's turn." Another deep sigh.

Kevin sat in silence. "I guess you�re right."

Ignoring this comment Johnny continued, "What I don�t like is that we�re in the beginning of a tour..hell we haven�t even started yet and already one of you boys are sick." He shook his head. "I really hope that none of you catch this little bug since it seem to be a real sucker."

Kevin nodded as his manager went on, "We�re running on a tight schedule and you guys have lots of shows to do in a short period of time," he ran a hand over his face, tiredly, "The concert tomorrow is fully booked and I can�t afford to let any of you guys off. Therefore I�m planning on letting the kid out of this dinner."

"You are?" Kevin was very much surprised over the direction this conversation was taking.

"Yes," Johnny chuckled slightly, "I really don�t think he would be much good dinner company anyway."

"No probably not." Kevin agreed with a nod. His manager really seemed to surprise him from time to time. And today was such an occassion. Letting out a sigh of relief he asked, "So then I can tell Nicky that he can stay at home?"

"Yes." Johnny took a large gulp of his drink, grimacing as the scotch burned his throat.

"Ok..but who is going to stay with him then?" The question came a bit unexpectedly.

"What do you mean?" Johnny frowned. "We�re talking about an sixteen year old you know. He�s not a child."

"Maybe not but he is much too sick to be on his own tonight."

The manager must have thought for a moment cause he scratched his head in that motion like he always did when he was deep in thoughts. He cocked his head. "So what you�re saying Richardson is that the kid needs a baby-sitter?"

� "In a way..yes...pretty much so" Kevin looked serious. "When I left him he had a very high fever and was throwing up so no I don�t think he is well enough to be on his own." This was a bit of an exaggeration.

"You sure?"

"Mmm." Kevin took the courage to say what was on his mind. "My suggestion is that one of us, me or one of the other guys stay back at the hotel while the rest are going to the dinner. That way we can be there if he needs us."

"Hmmm" The manager was in deep thoughts, rubbing his chin with his hand. "IF I would decide on such a thing which one of you guys is prepared to stay?"

"I can or Brian or.. it really doesn�t matter." Kevin shrugged, "I guess it can be any one of us."

Johnny nodded. "Well I�ll see what I can do about it." He stood up, walking towards the door. The signal for Kevin that the meeting time was up and that he had other things to do. "Meanwhile you go and get ready for that dinner party."

Not satisfied with the sudden change in attitude the younger man pressed on, "When will you have made your decision? I mean about which of us that can stay at the hotel?"

"I don�t know." Johnny sounded at once annoyed. "First I have to call Lou and then.."

Kevin's heart sank as he heard the manager tell him what had to be cleared off first. Knowing Lou he knew that there was no way in hell that the manager would let something like that happen. He would probably press on for Nick to go onstage too. That was the kind of bastard he was and if Kevin had the chance he would get out of that manager as soon as he could but they were all stuck with a contract. A slave contract for at least two more years. "Lou you say?" Kevin mumbled as he made his way towards the door."

"Yes." Johnny frowned at the man's expression. "Don�t you worry I�m sure that Lou will not give me any other directions." He patted the tall man on his shoulder in a comforting way.

'Yeah sure,' Kevin thought darkly, 'Pigs would get wings sooner than that.'

"Oh and Richardson I nearly forgot. Sonia Benzaara or whatever her name is, has been looking for you all evening."

"She has?" The words came like an surprise. "Why?"

"She wants to know when you can do that One to One interview that has been scheduled for tonight."

Kevin sighed. What was this woman? Some kind of energizer bunny? "Well she will have to wait. First I have to make sure that Nick is doing allright."

That was an answer that the dark man didn�t like. "No Kevin you have obligations to do no matter what and I don�t care that Nicky is sick as a dog. You still have to do your part." His tone was firm.

"I know..I know." Kevin hissed. "Just you concentrate on getting a clearance for Nicky and one of us and I�ll take care of my part." With that he closed the door firmly behind him, setting his steps towards Howie and AJ�s room.

*********************************************************************************************************************************************************** ******

"What a load of crap." AJ hissed, tossing the remote control on the bed. Yawning he sat up in bed, running his hand through his short and chopped hair. Jetlag was starting to set in and it didn�t help that he�d been up since four this morning. Stretching his limbs he noticed that every bone in his skinny body ached and he silently hoped that he hadn�t caught whatever shit his little bro was suffering from. Flu had a nasty habit of traveling fast in the Backstreet Camp. Especially the bugs the teen seemed to catch. He had to get going since they had to be down in the lobby within an hour, getting ready to go the dinner party. Not that he felt like going anyway, but since it was considered work there was nothing he could do but obey, besides his stomach was growling with hunger and even if those events were pretty boring he could at least look forward to a delicious meal. Now he could only hope that there wouldn�t be any boring talk and that the people he was eating together with would realize that they were pretty beat and they would get to go home early.

Fat chance.

The luck that they were having right now, with Nick being sick and all in the beginning of a tour, he would probably end up with some fat lady that kept jabbering about this and that, boring himself to death in the process. Deciding that a shower was needed he walked stiffly into the bathroom, shred his clothes to his birthsuit and then stepped into the shower. Turning up the heat until it nearly burned his skin he savored the nice, relaxing feeling of the water running down his body. Closing his eyes he just stood there, letting the water rinse away all of his troubles. He had no idea how long he�d stood there when the door suddenly burst open and the face of his room mate appeared in the doorway.

"OOps!"

Annoyed over being disturbed in such a relaxing moment AJ spat back, "Fuck D. Didn�t your mom ever teach you to knock?"

"Sorry man," the older boy apologized quickly, before closing the door behind him. "I had no idea that you were in here."

"Well I am, besides where the hell would I be anyway?" AJ asked sounding a bit more annoyed than he in reality was. "It�s not like I can go running around the city you know." He let out his breath. "D! Next time make sure that someone is in the room before you barge in like that, or I�m going to think that you�re gay and just looking for an excuse to see my well fit body."

A laugh could be heard from the other side of the room. "Just let me know when you�re done. All right?" And don�t use up all the hot water, I need to take a shower too."

'That you should have thought of before you barged in like that,' AJ smiled smugly turning up the heat a notch. Heck it was cold in here, the water system took a long time to warm up and he was starting to get the chills. It was more and more reminding him of those finnish winerbaths he�d tried once in Scandinavia. It had been so cold, jumping into that icy pool that AJ was sure that his dick would turn blue and then fall off. Luckily nothing like that had happened and all they got was a nasty cold. Damn weather. Ten minutes later and not a drop of hot water left, AJ turned off the tap and then stepped out, wrapping a white towel around his waist. He�d been turning on such a blast that the room was all steamed up from the heat. Wiping a hole in the mirror with his hand a red face stared back at him. A red face with blue bags under his eyes. Heck he was starting to look like the fucking rainbow. There was a sound of someone else in the room since if it wasn�t the odds wouldn�t be too good on the Latinos mental health, especially if he was talking to himself.

Opening the door he found Kevin sitting on his bed. "Hi Kev." AJ walked inside the room, pulling the suitcase out from underneath his bed.

"Hi." His brother looked tired. Beat.

"What you�re doing here? You�re not ready?"

"No." Kevins answer was short.

"Why not?" AJ pulled out a couple of clean boxers, shred the towel and then put them on. The movement got some heated response.

"Jay what the heck! Can�t you do that somewhere else?" Howie yelped, looking away. "Man you�re prude." AJ filled in with a grin, "D it�s just me. The guy you�ve spent the most time with. Your best friend. Why are you all of a sudden so tight up over me standing here in the nude and all?"

"Oh AJ grow up" Kevin said tiredly, "Not everyone wants to see your naked ass!"

"Maybe not you, but I�m sure the girls will." He took a glance outside, " I should show them my glory and I bet that they wouldn�t be this prude." Grinning he moved towards the balcony.

"Don�t," Kevin mumbled, rubbing a hand over his face in a tired gesture.

Noticing that none of the guys were really in a mood for a joke the rebel changed his approach. "Chill man," he said. "What�s the matter? Something happen?"

"I guess you can say that," Howie sighed. "Kevin just told me that we�re all expected to attend this dinner party. Nicky included."

"What?" AJ didn�t believe his ears. "What the fuck are you saying? That Kaos has to come along too?" Turning to Kevin he rose his voice, "I thought you said that you were gonna talk to Johnny about all this. Getting him a red card?"

"I was and he did."

"Then what the fuck is D jabbering about?" Howie shot his friend a look but said nothing more.

"It just didn�t work out as planned." Kevin looked sad. "He just called me to inform us that he�d spoken to Lou and that he said that we�re ALL suppose to attend this dinner party. It�s filled with important business people and he wants us all there no matter what condition we're in. His words according to Johnny was quote: "I don�t care if they are dying. Get them there. All five of them, including the Noick!"

"You�re fucking not serious? Have you seen the kid?" AJ felt anger rise up inside of him. "He wants us to drag Nicky who is so sick that he is puking his guts up to a dinner party?" The rebel shook his head, "He�s freaking crazy!"

"That�s what he said. Yes."Kevin sighed heavily. There was silence in the room as the men were all taking in what had been told.

AJ was the first to break the silence. "So what are we gonna do about it then? I mean we can't drag a sick teen that is running a high fever to a dinnerparty, can we?"

"No we can�t." Howie responded. Turning to the younger man he asked, "Didn�t you say that your mom was gonna come here soon? When was that?"

"My mom?" he looked confused. What did Denise have to do with anything? "Uh yeah?"

"When was that?" Kevin pressed on.

"She said that she would come here tomorrow. If the plans haven�t changed." AJ frowned. "Why?"

"Maybe she can talk to Lou you know. Make him to change his mind."

AJ smiled palely, "D I�m happy you think that about my mom but let me tell you that she doesn�t have that power. You know as well as me that when Lou has his mind set on something he goes through with it."

Howie nodded. "It was just a thought."

"Yeah but not a very good one."

The Latino stared sourly back at his room mate, "Then YOU come up with something better."

"I will and.."

The rebel started to mouth back when Kevin rose his hand, "Stop it! You�re not making the situation any better by fighting with each other. We�ve gotta find a solution but not this way." The oldest had spoke again.

"Maybe we should call his parents?"

'God what was it with Howie and family' AJ thought irritated. "And do what? What can they do that we can�t?" Shaking his head he continued, "D you�re honestly that stupid that you think that they are gonna come on a plane just because their kid has the flu?"

"My mom would," Howie defended a bit hurt over how AJ made his suggestion sound stupid.

"Yeah maybe yours but not Nicks. Definatly not Nicks. Trust me on that one."

Howie glared back but said nothing more.

� Kevin rose from the bed.

"Where you�re going?"

"To talk to Brian and see how Nick is doing. If he is still feeling like crap, which I think he is, then I�m making the call." He looked at his two friends, "He won�t have to go and I�m staying with him. Period."

"You�ll get shit out of this Kev." AJ shook his head.

"Doesn�t matter. I know what I gotta do and that is what I�m doing." With that he opened the door. "I�ll let you guys know what happens. All right?"

"'K." None of them had anything to add. As soon as their big brother had left the room AJ turned to Howie, "You think he�ll do something stupid?"

"Like what?" Howie had grabbed the towel, getting ready to take a shower.

"You know disobeying Lou's order and all."

"Well, if he does it�s his choice not yours or ours." Howie said wisely before walking into the bathroom. Turning on the light he shouted, "Heck Jay it�s like a sauna in here." Looking at the younger man's innocent face he continued, "I hope you didn�t use up all of the hot water."

The eighteen year old said nothing, even if he inside couldn�t help but smiling even if the situation was pretty bad. Howie would find the answer to that question soon enough. It didn�t take long before a loud yell could be heard in the hotel room; "Shiiiiiiitttt Ajeeeeeee. It�s freaaakiiiinggggg coooooooooooooold!!"

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 12

He needed a drink! Desperately!

This day had been nothing but pure hell ever since the moment he opened his eyes in the morning. Now he needed something to relax him. Tiredly Kevin ran a hand across his face while trying to decide what he should do about the situation that they were getting themselves involved in. Talking to AJ and Howie he�d been very settled on disobeying Lou's orders but now he wasn�t so sure anymore. There was a strong possibility that if he acted too much against the management's wishes he would be kicked out of the group and that was not something he could afford to do. Not even for someone like Nick.

Yet there was no way that he could let the kid get dragged to a dinner party in the condition he was in right now. That would be much too inhuman. The possibility of staying with him was pretty much worn out too and no matter how he tried to save the situation and mostly Nick he would end up as a looser. The trick was to know where he would loose the most.

After getting back from the guys he�d walked back to Johnny in a hope of trying to talk some sense into him but came back empty handed. The black manager had told him that he understood the situation but as it was right now he couldn�t let Nick off even if he himself thought it would have been a wise decision. According to Johnny, Lou had been very firm in his quest that ALL boys were expected to attend the dinner party. There were too many hotshots from the business to pass up such an opportunity.

Kevin's only shot was to get Johnny to understand that Trans con would look bad if Nick did something like barf all over the place or pass out. But it could turn out to be futile too as Lou rarely budged a bit and Johnny was just the guy that followed the orders. It would be another dead end!

As if things were not bad enough he�d tried calling Kristin to talk about what had happened earlier just to be met with the answering machine. He hadn�t left a message since he didn�t know what to say. Somehow sorry didn�t seem to cut it and he�d hung up, intended to call later on.

Scanning the small minibar in his room he searched for something to drink. Anything that could take away the pain that he felt deep inside. The grief of loosing the woman that he loved was becoming too much and to tell the truth the entire reason for deciding to put his ass out for Nick wasn�t just because the teen was unwell. No, it was probably more cause he couldn�t cope with meeting that many people tonight. Tending to a sick kid was all he could handle right now.

Pulling out a small bottle of scotch he poured it into his glass and then took a large gulp. It tasted strong and burned his tastebuds as it went down into his stomach. Strangely there was a comforting feeling too and for a moment he toyed with the idea of getting really drunk. Plastered and then see what Lou had to say about it.

But that would be too immature and the guys depended on him. At first this big brother image, daddy figure, was something that the media as well as the management had set upon him. But as the years past something had changed. Being the oldest in the group left him with lots of responsibilities and even if the other guys, especially Nicky, got on his nerves he still loved and cared for them. Today at the interview he had slipped. He�d been rude to Nick for no reason what so ever. It was like the teen got a touch of his own bad mood and this had him without even suspecting that Nick felt sick teasing him infront of the camera. The reporter had been right. He was rude and he had no reason to be.

Taking another taste of the drink he was disturbed by a knock on the door. "Come in" he yelled not bothering to go and open it.

The door opened and AJ let himself into the room. "Sorry to bother you but..." he stopped himself, "What? Are you drinking?" He sat down on the bed next to Kevin who moved over to the armchair instead.

"Kinda." Kevin waved with his hand, "Ok go on.."

"I just wanted to let you know that I think its very stupid of you to risk your neck for Nick, you know. But at the same time great too" Kevin frowned as the younger man fidgeted as he said the words. Without waiting for any answer he continued, "Why the hell are you drinking Kev? I mean it�s not like you to take a drink and weren�t you supposed to go and see how Nick and Brian were doing? At least that was what you told us before you left."

Kevin sighed, feeling defeated. "For the first it�s my business if I drink or not. Second yes I�m on my way to talk to B and Nick. But right now I wanted a moment of peace and quiet and that I still do." He hoped that AJ would get the drift.

But he didn�t.

"So what are you going to do then? Talk with Lou again or Johnny or what?"

Feeling pressed and not knowing what to say or do Kevin snarled back, "I have no idea, but if you could leave me alone maybe I would have some time to think something out."

"Like what?" AJ opened the minibar too and pulled out a small liquor bottle. As he was about to open it Kevin yelled at him, "Don�t touch that one."

Surprised but also a bit hurt over getting treated like a kid AJ looked at him, "What�s the matter with you today? I was just going to take a taste when you started to yell at me."

"You can�t drink and you know it. Your underaged."

AJ snorted. "Bah."

"Besides you have to go to that dinner and be presentable and.." He was cut off by the angry rebel.

"And what Kev? What do you want me to do? Sit there with a bunch of suits pretending that I�m having the time of my life?" His voice rose an octave, "Do you have any freaking idea how freaking tired I am tonight? And tomorrow we have a show to do," he snapped. "Man management is running us all too hard and it�s no wonder that Kaos is getting sick again. Hell we�ve been on break for just a week and now we�re back on the road again. I�m telling you that it has to stop or we will all break down."

Kevin looked at his younger friend. There were not many times when such heated words about the situation at hand had came across his lips. It surprised him that the teen was feeling that way. "And what do you want me to do about all this then?" he asked tiredly.

"Nothing Kev..you can�t do a damn thing that is why I think it�s stupid of you to risk your ass for Nick in the way you�re doing now."

Kevin sat silent for a while, rolling the scotch in his glass. Putting the glass down on the table he asked, despair evident in his voice, "I loose whatever I do. I mean I can�t just ignore the fact that Nicky is in no shape to go to a dinner party and if Johnny is too stupid or too blind to notice at least someone has to act and do something about it!" His tone was heated.

AJ picked up the phone handing it to Kevin, "Make that call then. Tell Johnny how bad off you think Nick is and all that crap."

The older man looked at the rebel. "You don�t think I have tried to tell him that?"

"Yeah I do, but apparently not hard enough since he didn�t budge" He pressed the phone into Kevin's hand, "Call him. Johnny ain't so bad. He�ll listen."

"Maybe to you..but sure as hell not to me."

The younger boy frowned, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You tell me..I�m not the one that is dating his daughter" Kevin sneered.

"So?" AJ cocked his head to the side. "Besides what does that have to do with anything?"

Kevin looked him sternly in the eye, "Heck Jay don�t come and say that it doesn't matter. He is practically your father in law!"

"He is not!" Now AJ was starting to get mad over the road the conversation was taking. "What�s the matter with you today?"

"What do you mean?" Kevin asked taking another mouth of the scotch, swishing it around in the mouth before the strong liquid seeped it space in the stomach.

"You�ve been like a bitch all day. Bitching and nagging about everything" The older man opened his mouth to speak when AJ cut him short. "What you were saying to Nick was pretty uncalled for too and you�ve been acting like something is eating your ass all day" Looking at his friend he continue, "What�s wrong? Did something happen?"

"NO!" Kevin's words came a little too fast for AJ�s liking. The rebel frowned, not believing him.

"Yeah right!"

Kevin looked him sternly in his eyes, "Nothing happened and nothing is wrong. And even if it was you wouldn�t be the one to hear about it."

Not satisfied with the answer AJ pressed on. "I don�t believe you. You�re the one that is drinking before going to work and even if you can be a true bitch sometimes Kev, it�s not like you to act this stressed" Noticing the older man shifting uncomfortable in his chair he asked, "Did something happen before you left? With Kristin?"

The older man jerked upon mentioning the words. What was AJ? Some kind of mind reader? "No" he said this time slower, "I told you before and I'll tell you again, nothing is wrong with me. I�m just tired and have a lot on my mind that�s all."

"It�s about Nick or..??"

He was cut off by Kevin who said annoyed, "Not everything is about Nick you know. I don�t know what you�re playing at Jay but whatever it is do me a favor will ya. Stop acting like a shrink!"

"Okay," AJ held up a hand in defense, "Dude just don't go pissy on me" Looking at Kevin he continued, "But you know dude that if there is something eatin' ya, you know you can always turn to daddy Bone with your problems" He grinned widely at Kevin's annoyed _expression.

"When hell freezes over!"

"Man you sure are a happy face today!" It was said with a sarcastic tone and it was the last thing that had Kevin keep his calm posture together

"That's it I don�t need you coming into my room telling me what a bitch I am today. If you don�t like it..then you can get the hell out of here" He pointed to the door, "You know your way out."

Surprised over the sudden outburst AJ stood up, "Ok Kev if you wanna be a nag..then be one but don�t come blaming me when you do something to fuck it all up!" With that he slammed the door hard behind him.

"Punk" Kevin muttered quietly as he opened another bottle of scotch. He was sick and tired of it all and didn�t care what the result would be. Nick and the rest of the guys were not his problem and if they thought he was going to act like a dad for them they were coming to the wrong conclusion. He didn�t care if he had obligations to tend to, if he made people disappointed. Right now all he had in his mind was to escape....escape from it all. In other words get totally punch drunk...

********************************************************************************************************************************************************** "Nick come on. You gotta let me in!" Brian knocked on the door to the small bedroom. He�d been standing outside for what seemed like forever and the sounds that could be heard frightened him as well as made him feel disgusted. A loud groan had him knocking harder on the door. "Open up. Now!"

"No. Leave me alone..let me die in pea.." The weak pathetic words were quickly drowned out by the sound of his friend being violently sick again. This was some kind of flu Nick had managed to catch.

"Man not again." Brian scrunched up his nose, wincing in disgust. Hearing someone get sick was not his cup of tea, but then was that to anyone? If he�d only listened to Kevin and let him be the one to stay with Nick instead, but oh no he had to do the opposite way. As always.

Being the stubborn human being he was born to he had a habit to neglect his cousin's words and then paying the price for it. This was no different from when he and Kevin played and Brian had decided to see if he could jump from the highest top of the barn. At that time he hadn�t been scared of heights and Kevin's futile tries in getting him to reconsider his actions had been wasted. He�d jumped only to discover that a concussion wasn�t that fun to have, especially when his other cousins and friends were allowed to play outside and he had to spend the weekend at the hospital. Ever since then Brian hated heights.

He should have listened then and he should have listened now. Ever since Kevin had left the room Nick had been getting worse. He�d complained about the headache and then the nausea set in and now he was vomiting. After much coaxing from Brian's side he�d managed to drag the sick teen into the bathroom to be allowed some privacy but also to block out the unwanted noise and views that came with sickness. Nick had barely made it in time and upon hearing his friend turning his stomach inside and out he had just as difficult to swallow down the bile that burned in his throat. Noticing this, Nick had responded with closing the door and then locking it before Brian had a chance to object. Probably in an attempt not to gross out the older boy too much.

At first Brian felt relieved by the action but as time passed and the sickness showed no signs in slowing down he�d got seriously concerned trying to get the teen to open up. Either Nick refused cause he was sick or stubborn since nothing happened and Brian had to spend his time outside, banging on the door, wanting to get inside.

The groans and moans and whimpers that could be heard left him feeling helpless. His first thought was to call Kevin or any of the other guys and get them to come down and help him but then he�d remembered the previous conversation that went on with his cousin earlier in the evening. He�d told very firmly that he didn�t need his help and that he could manage very well thank you on his own. Now one hour later he realized it was nothing but bullshit, yet he was too stoic to confess how desperate he felt. Especially not to Kevin who was always butting into his life one time or the other.

Growing up in the midst of Kentucky he�d spent a lot of time with Kevin and his other cousins. Their grandparents had a farm and they used to spend the summer there. Kevin, who was one of the oldest of the cousins was the leader and he was the one that decided on the rules too. As a kid Brian was often very sickly and everyone, including Kevin acted very overprotective of him because of his heart defect. Deep inside he hated this and at one time he decided that when he grew up he wouldn�t allow people to be overprotective of him and treat him like a kid. Especially not Kevin. Luckily for him Nick turned out to be the baby in the group, the one everyone had to look after.

Biting back his pride he mumbled to the closed door, "Frack man, you want me to get someone? Kevin? Howie?"

No answers to that question could be heard and instead a harsh sound of sickness filled the room. Brian had to steal himself from not escaping that was how bad it was. Yet he stayed. Nick needed him.

"God it huuurrtttsss," the teen whimpered, his voice choked up with tears and pain.

"It does? Where does it hurt? Your stomach?" Nothing. "The headache?" A small whimper... Brian was doing his best to try and remain calm but when all he got back was a sob he quickly lost his calm surface. "Nick you�re scaring me" he said with a shaky tone, "Let me in. Now."

Another whimper could be heard and then the sounds of more heaving. This was starting to get scary. "I said open up!" Brian urged as he pressed his shoulder hard against the door in a stupid as well as fruitless attempt to break in. But his body wasn�t exactly Arnold Schwarzenegger and it proved to be nothing but dumb. All he got was a sore shoulder. Just when he�d decided to go and get Kevin, he could see the lock to the door being turned and was finally being able to get inside the room.

"Nick?"

The sight that met him had him even more concerned than before. There on the cold tiled floor sat Nick, his head next to the toilet and his arms wrapped around his legs like it was providing him some comfort. His head leaned against his knees and it looked like it was pure will that was holding him up straight. The face was unnaturally flushed and tears as well as sweat streamed down his cheeks, leaving marks of stripes. His hair was tousled and wet no doubt from the strain he was putting himself through and in the dusk of light, Nick hadn�t turned on the lamp, he noticed how sickly his friend really looked. His red rimmed eyes filled with pain.

Squinting against the light that beamed in from the rest of the room Nick mumbled weakly, "Turn it off..please."

"Turn what off?" For a second Brian felt confused.

"The light," he covered his eyes with his hand, "Turn it off. It hurts my eyes."

"It does?" This was some kind of awkward bug that Nick had managed to catch. Turning off the lamp he apologized. "I�m sorry, but you can�t sit here in the dark you know." Despite the disgusting smell that lingered in the room he sat down beside his friend, stroking away the sweaty bangs that clinged against Nick's forehead. "Hey buddy, how are you really doing?"

The reply he got was not something he expected when the teen quickly leaned over the bowl again, vomiting violently what little was left in his stomach. Brian winced. This was worse than he�d ever imagined. Once again he had to fight his own gag reflex since sharing the bowl was not on his list right now. As in a miracle he managed to cope once again and the nausea went on a rebound. Feeling better he concentrated on supporting the blonde instead by stroking his back in that same way that he�d seen Kevin do so many times in the past. Whatever it was with this motion it made the younger boy relax. "That�s it," he cooed, "Try to calm down. It was easier said then done since Nick was now shivering so violently that he was wracked with chills.

He was getting worse by the minute. Or at least so it seemed.

"I can�t stand it anymore..it�s so bad" Nick sobbed and tears ran down his cheeks, streaking his skin in the process. He spat into the bowl as the worst bout subsided. It feels like my he..head is.. abo..about to expl..explode" The words were hard to say and he moaned as the dry heaves began again.

"Oh man" The older man didn�t know what to say. He was so grossed out yet he couldn�t do anything but watch his friend being this sick. "That bad huh?"

The teen didn�t respond, instead he concentrated on dry heaves and when it was finally over he leaned back against Brian, all wiped out.

"You think you�re done?" Brian asked as Nick let all his weight lean on Brian. He was heavy, especially since now when he wasn�t throwing up anymore sleepiness had set in and the older man had a hard time holding him up.

"Yeah" He swallowed hard. "I think so."

"Good" Brian started to stand, "Come on then. We�ve gotta get you into bed. Get you some rest."

Nick hesitated, "I don�t know." His voice was weak. Flushing the toilet he looked at the swirls, like in transfixion. It was no doubt that his friend was very tired. More tired than he tried to let on.

"What don�t you know?" Brian was half sitting, trying to hold Nick up while he was judging whether or not he would manage the teen on his own, back to bed. Nick was tall, much taller than he was and this adding to the fact that he was almost unconscious now when he wasn�t dry heaving any longer made Brian realize that it would be a hard task getting him into bed.

"If I�m done. It just hits me so fast. The nausea. Especially when I move" He blushed despite the fever.

Brian could sense that his friend had a hard time talking. It was like every word was a gigantic struggle.

"Maybe we need to get you to a doctor then" The older man frowned. "I mean if it�s that bad, as you say it is."

"No" The teen snapped open his eyes, wide. If there was one thing Brian knew his friend hated it was going to the doctor. Why? He had no idea. After all it was something natural and being often sick as a kid the older boy had nothing against it. The same couldn�t be said for Nick.

"But what if it�s something serious?" Brian knew his words sounded weird but sometimes it was better to scare the teen a bit so he would understand the seriousness.

"Well, it�s not." The blonde groaned, sitting up straighter on the floor. "It�s just the flu" He made a move to stand, like the small rest had given him some strength. "And like I said. No doctors. I�ll be fine."

This had Brian in for a fit. "No you�re not," he hissed. "Puking ain�t fine. Having a headache that feels like your head is going to explode ain't fine. You need medical care."

His friend gave him a dark eye. "Don�t" he warned when the Kentuckian opened his mouth to object again. Knowing that the battle was over and that he�d lost Nick could be a hard cookie to convince about something and today proved to be such a situation.

"Ok well," he said with a sigh. "At least let me help you back to bed. Here you can�t lay, on the floor. It�ll get cold." Surprised but also a bit worried that there were no comments, he helped Nick to stand. The teen looked at once dizzy and for a moment Brian feared that there would be another trip back to the porcelain bus. Luckily the nausea seemed to settle down when he steadied his hands against the basin and soon they could continue their journey back to the bedroom.

They had just about made it to the bed and was about to sit down when there was a knock on the door and Howie came into the room, "Oh let me help you." The Latino was instantly by their side and helped Brian set their friend down. Without any words Nick laid down his aching head on the cool pillow, closing his eyes immediately

"Thanks man, he�s kind of heavy." Brian smiled paley.

Howie nodded as he asked, "How is he doi.." Changing his mind he turned to Nick, "How are you doing buddy?"

"Not so good." The teen croaked weakly as he rolled to his side, his face buried in the soft pillow.

"Yeah," Brian nodded, "He�s been throwing up non stop." There was a grimace. "Man I didn�t know that someone could be this sick."

"Oh." Howie looked sad. "That bad huh?"

"Mmmm." Brian was the one that was filling in for the words. "He's also complaining of a headache. Saying that it feels like his head is gonna explode."

"Awww." Howie looked with compassion at his friend. "That sucks buddy" He patted Nick's warm cheek gently. Turning to Brian he asked, "Did you give him any Tylenol? Aspirin?"

"Yea earlier on when Kevin was here." Brian nodded, "but I don�t think it would stay down right now anyway" The words had both Nick as well as Brian wincing as they remembered what had been going on in the bathroom minutes ago. A repeat performance of that didn�t sound too tempting.

"Ok."

"Anyway...what are you doing here? Aren�t you supposed to go to the dinner?" Brian asked a bit confused seeing his buddy so well dressed up.

"Yup," the Latino fidget a bit. "As a matter of fact that is why I am coming. We�re ALL supposed to go the dinner" He emphasized on the word all.

"And who is going to be with Nick then?" Brian said at once sounding a bit irritated. "You can�t expect us to leave Kaos alone can you? He's way to sick to be left alone."

Howie fidgeted even more like he was nervous to spell the words out loud. "Don�t you see.....Lou expects us ALL to be there..Nick included."

Upon hearing the last words Brian was silent before he added, "You�re not serious are you?"

"Yes." Howie sighed heavily. "That�s what Kevin told me and he�d spoken to Johnny who talked to Lou and Mr. Pearlman's words were that we were all expected there."

"I don�t believe it!" Brian was suddenly very stubborn. "There is no way Nick can go to a dinner party the way he is feeling right now." The Kentuckian's voice had gone up several octaves. "For crying out loud, look at him!" He gestured towards the teen that had crawled up in festering position. "He can�t expect us to drag him with us. That would be insane."

"I know" Howie twiddled his thumbs. Looking at the pale teen that had his eyes closed and that looked more dead then alive. His breathing was a bit labored and there was no telling if he was asleep or not. "But those were the words that Lou said and Johnny is following him too so.." He was cut off by his upset friend.

"You can�t mean that Nick is actually going? What is Kevin saying about all this? Does he know about it?" Brian looked like a pitbull getting ready for a fight.

"He knows all right and he tried talking Johnny into letting him stay, he even said it would be a disaster but neither of the managers are paying attention to this" Brian started to interrupt him again when Howie held up a hand, "No wait..let me finish..Johnny said that there would be some big shots from the business out there and they wanted to meet all five of us. That�s why we cant back out of this now."

"This is stupid!" Brian was so upset that his face was all red, walking over to the phone he picked it up "I�m calling Kevin."

"NO!" Howie's tone was a bit too desperate which had Brian suspicious

"Why can�t I call Kev?" He eyed his friend carefully.

"Eh..uh..I don�t think that is a good idea." The Latino had always been bad at lying. "You know..eh..he is getting ready."

"Well then..even better that I call him cause we can't let Nick go this sick to a dinner party. That would be like killing the kid off."

A moan could be heard from the bed, apparently Nick wasn�t asleep just yet. He moved restlessly like he was in severe pain.

"Now you�re waking him up too," Brian said annoyed over the way Howie had shouted.

"I�m not asleep." Nick croaked from his side of the room. His voice was barely recognizable. "I have such a headache."

"Oh." Both of the men were by his side instantly, forgotten about the argument that they had earlier on. "You want me to get you something?"

"Yes, please..." Nick mumbled as his fingers rubbed furiously at his temples. "a new head!"

"Ok other than that?" Brian chuckled despite the fear he was feeling. "I think you have a pretty good head as it is Frack." "I don�t." He sounded so small. "It hurts and I feel sick." Both Howie and Brian's eyes went big. "You gonna puke again?" There was fear in the Kentuckian's voice as he automatically reached for the trashcan that stood beside the bed.

"No" Nick mumbled to both men's relief , "I just feel iffy. My back hurts too and I can�t lay still. It�s hot in here" He made an attempt to sit up but had to lay back again since the dizziness became too much. This action gave even more fuel to Brian's argument that Nick was in no shape nor form to get up from bed.

"See he can barely sit up without passing out" There was despair in the younger man's voice. "How are we supposed to get him ready to go to a dinner party?" Brian ran a hand through his hair. "It would be a disaster."

Howie nodded. "You�re right, but I don�t know what to do." He scratched his head like he was thinking. After a moment of silence the Latino opened his mouth to speak. "I know that this might sound farfetched but.."

"But what?" Brian interrupted him, being impatient.

Howie frowned. "Like I said I don�t know but maybe Johnny needs to see him in this state so he knows that we�re not exaggerating. You know so he knows how bad off he really is" The Latino paused. "Although I think he needs to go to a doctor."

Brian wasn�t fast enough to object to the last words, telling his friend how much Nick hated the doctors issue to be brought up which had the youngest open his eyes again. "I said no doctors..I�ll be fine..just let me rest" With that he buried his head into the pillow, hoping to block out the small light that was coming from the lamp on the opposite side of the room.

"But I.." Howie started only to be met with a dark eye from Brian and a silent mouthing "don�t"

"Ok." The older man acted defeated. "Well, at least let me get Johnny then.." He walked towards the door. "He needs to see what he is doing to the kid if he is dragging him along."

Brian nodded, looking relieved. "Yes that would be an idea. I�m sure he�ll change his mind if he sees what state Nick is in."

"I hope you�re right." Howie's last words were before disappearing out of the room. As soon as they were left alone Brian sat down on his bed. Suddenly feeling very tired. There was no way he could muster some strength to go to the dinner party. Why hadn�t Johnny and the rest of the management realized that they were all pretty beat after traveling for hours and all they needed right now was to get a few hours shuteye, not pretending that they were in a festive mood.

"Frick!" Nick's weak voice could be heard across the room.

"Yes?" Instantly Brian was at his side. "What is it? You feel sick again? You want me to help you to the bathroom?"

"No" The teen shook his head weakly, looking at him with glazed red rimmed eyes, "Do you think it�ll work out?"

"Work what out?" Brian asked calmly, stroking a damp strand from his friend's sweaty forehead.

Licking his dry lips Nick made another attempt to talk. "Do you really think I get to stay?" The words were weak, strangled. Pain evident in his voice.

Brian sighed. He didn�t know what to say to Nick. Didn�t know what to expect. Usually Johnny wasn't such a hardass to deal with but then they had never really done something against his wishes before. He was sure that the black manager would realize that it would be stupid to drag a sick kid out to the city, especially someone who's fever was rising by the minute and that looked like he would drop out from earth all the time. Yet he knew that Johnny was not someone to disobey orders especially Lou's or Trans con. So the results had yet to be seen.

Not wanting to disturb the teen even more he stroked another string away, whispering silently, "I hope so little man, I really do"

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 13

The moment Howie set his foot inside the room he noticed that something was wrong. AJ laid on the bed, zapping with the remote controller and when the Latino arrived he turned his head. A dull _expression in his eyes.

"What happened? Why are you laying there?" Howie asked a bit annoyed. They were late as it was already and the last thing they needed was AJ refusing to go. "Why are you not ready?"

A deep sigh could be heard from the bed. The channel on TV was changed and then the eighteen year old said with a face. "You have to ask Kevin about that!"

"Kevin?" Howie's face was a question mark. "What does he have to do with anything?" Not waiting for an answer Howie pointed at the watch. "In about ten where supposed to be downstairs going to a dinner and now you�re just laying here being lazy." With a snarl he added. "Don�t you dare to make this any harder than it already is."

"I�m not." The teen sat up in his bed. "Besides I�m not the one you should bitch about..do that to Kevin instead."

"Kevin again?" Howie frowned. "Why do you keep bringing him up all the time?"

"Go to his room and ask him and you�ll find out."

Howie sighed. What was it with everybody today? If they were not irritated they were playing charades with his mind. It was annoying that was what it was. "Ok and why should I go and ask him?" For a second the Latino's face lit up. "Did he talk to Johnny? Is it ok for Nick to stay at home?"

"No" AJ shook his head, "I wish it was that simple."

"OK..then what?" Howie, the calm one in the group was starting to loose his temper. He was just as tired as the rest of them and wasn�t exactly looking forwards working in the evening. Johnny had them running on a tight schedule, sometimes a bit too hard then they could cope with and to tell the truth he had wished that they had a few more weeks free time since he longed to be with his family a bit more. Family and friends.

"He's drinking."

"Drinking?" Howie couldn�t believe his ears. "Are you saying what I think you�re saying?" Ok he knew that Kevin was an in a bad mood and that was the main reason for keeping Brian out so there wouldn�t be any arguments, but this, this was worse than he�d ever expected.

"Mmmm." AJ hadn�t turned his attention away from the TV. "Yeah he is getting drunk right now. On scotch."

"You serious?" A feeling of fright hit his veins. Kevin couldn�t be doing that, could he? No not today. Not when they needed him the most. Needed his leadership.

"Yeah I am and if you don�t believe me you can check it out yourself." AJ sounded tired. Beat.

"Why?"

There was an annoyed chuckle. "How the hell should I know. He's been acting like a bitch all day and when I was asking him why he was so upset he kept bitching at me again and told me to leave." The teens voice was filled with irritation. "I could care less what he does now."

"Don�t say that Bone." Howie scolded him.

"Well, I am telling the truth ain�t I and if you don�t believe me go and ask him. Maybe you have more luck with his moody ass." AJ spat.

"Did he talk to Johnny or something? You know when he was getting this upset?" The twenty four year old was fishing for clues.

"Yeah but I don�t think it�s what caused it." AJ sighed. "Kevin is getting weirder each day. I don�t know if the business is that good for him. He�s changing."

"We all changed. Even you Jay" Howie said being the wise person as he was. "I�m sure something would have happened for him to act this way. Did you hear if he was experiencing something bad on his break?"

"Yeah? Like what?" AJ sounded very uninterested. " The dude probably has PMS that�s why he is acting like this. Either that or he haven�t got a fuck for a long time!"

"Jay!" Howie was on his case again. "That was uncalled for. Not nice at all" He looked sternly. "Don�t say something like that."

"Well, then stop asking all those stupid questions. Go and see the dude instead if you�re that interested or concerned for him. "

"I will."

"Good." AJ laid down on the bed again, flipping on another channel with the remote. Just as Howie was about to leave the room he caught himself like he was reminded of something. "D?"

"Yeah?" The Latino stopped by the door post.

"Did you go and see Nick?"

A nod. "Mhmmm."

"And?" AJ was impatient. "How was he then?"

"Not so good."

"Oh." There was genuine concern in the almond eyes.

"Yeah he was throwing up and stuff. Not good at all. His headache is really bad."

AJ frowned. "That shitty huh?"

"Aha. He has no business working today either. He needs to stay at home and rest."

"It�s fucked up that management are the only ones that don�t realize that."

The Latino nodded. "You�re right. That�s why I�m going to talk to Johnny."

"You are? I thought you were going to talk to Kevin?" The teen asked in surprise.

"I am and I will, but I have to talk to Johnny too. The way Nick looked it would be fatal to have him attending a dinner party. It�s bad when he is well so what would it be when he is sick?" Howie opened the door. "If Johnny calls while I am at Kevin's tell him to go and see Nick at his room."

"In his room?" AJ asked but settled for that when his friend showed no sign of explaining anything for him. "Ok I�ll do that. And when you talk to Kev tell him to get a grip on things too. That he can�t fuck up like this. We need him."

Howie smiled palely. AJ could be so right sometimes. Kevin couldn�t go get drunk, not at a time like this. They needed him too much. With those words he was out of the room getting ready to talk some sense into their oldest Backstreet brother.

Swallowing hard he waited a couple of minutes, gathering his strength and then knocked on the door. At first there was silence then he could hear shuffling towards the door, a few cusswords as something fell down and then the door opened.

Howie couldn�t believe his eyes. Kevin was standing there, blear-eyed from alcohol and smelling like a whole liquor store. "What do you want?" he slurred as he opened the door to let Howie in.

"Oh my goodness what happened?" The Latino burst out as he caught the sight of the hotel room. There was a mess inside and he could see small bottles littered all over the bed. By the look of it he�d raided the minibar completely. This was definitely not the Kevin Richardson he knew; he was being way out of character.

"Hello to you too D." Kevin said with a sarcastic smile as he wobbled back to his bed, holding up the glass to his lips. "You coming to check on me? Did AJ rattle?" He balled his fist, "Cause if he has then I�m.." He couldn�t finish the sentence as Howie cut in.

"Eh..uh..No." Howie could feel himself blushing. He was a terrible liar.

"D I don�t know how to say this but you�re a terrible liar." He shook his head, "Not that it matters anyway. And to answer your question nothing or should we say everything happened." He grinned widely at his own joke. "but mostly I�m getting trashed." Holding up his glass towards Howie he asked, "You wanna have a drink too?"

"No." The Latino was shocked. What was wrong with his brother? Why was he acting so moody? This was not like him, not at all. It was almost like he�d flipped.

"Good 'cause I ain�t got anything more." He held the last bottle towards his mouth, shaking out every drop before asking mostly to himself "You think they give out drinks at the dinner party too? Cause if they do I will be one happy guy."

Surprised over the strange question Howie mumbled, "I don�t know..maybe."

"Great then I�m getting some." Tossing the empty minibottle aside he took a large gulp from the glass. "You�re coming to get me? To the dinner I mean."

The younger man felt stunned, not knowing what to say. "Eh..uh I don�t" he started before changing his mind. Kevin was in no shape or form to go to a dinner party and it would be a disaster if he turned up there. Even more than if Nick came along. "Kevin you can�t go to the dinner party."

"Why not?" The older man tugged at his clothes, acting like a drunk teen. "Is it because of my clothes?" It was clear that he wasn�t thinking straight.

"No, Kevin." Howie shook his head. "Your drunk."

That last sentence rose heat. "I�m NOT drunk. A little tipsy maybe but not drunk." He set his eyes into the younger man. "I�m 25 so I should be allowed to drink." As he rose his glass to his mouth he missed it and instead swished out some drops onto the bed and onto himself. "Shit" he mumbled, "I�m clumsy today." Standing up he made his way out to the bathroom.

"Where are you going?"

"To get a towel and wipe up the mess I made." Seconds later a loud crash could be heard and the a laughter.

Thinking that something bad must have happened, although he could hear Kevin's giggle he rushed into the small bathroom just to find the oldest member sitting on the floor, completely trashed with mountains of towels and toilet paper all over him.

Howie started to laugh. This was some sight.

"What a piece of junk!" his friend muttered as he tried to free himself from the towels.

"Oh Kevin." Howie sighed as he gave a helping hand. Once he got Kevin to his feet he lead him out of the room. "Just how much have you been drinking tonight?"

"Not much at all." Kevin laughed. "Just a few bottles" He gestured towards the small mountains of mini bottles that occupied the bed. Noticing this Howie saw that he had really been through the mini bar. Opening it up he found that it was empty.

"How did you manage to drown all of those?" Howie asked as he was taking in the oldest member, the one that always talked about not drinking too much was punch drunk and there was no one to take charge of the situation.

"No idea..but it was good." Kevin poured the rest of the alcohol into his mouth, swallowing it in one swift move. "You sure you don�t want something D? I mean you�re not the one to say no to a real and honest drunkenness?"

"No." Howie shook his head. "And neither should you. Come on," he added as he held his grip around Kevin's waste. "We gotta get you sober. You have any coffee in the room."

Kevin's eyes suddenly darkened. "Don�t tell me what I should and shouldn�t do. If I wanna drink I will drink and if I wanna stay sober I do that too. I�m a grown man and I do what the hell I wanna do with my life. Including drinking my ass off." He spat as viciously as a poisonous snake. "And for the record I don�t need any coffee."

Howie sighed. This was a nightmare and soon Johnny would be banging on the door. Helping the tall man to sit down on his bed he said with defeat. "This is not a good time to get drunk Kevin. We�re supposed to be downstairs soon and the way you�re acting right now you cant go to the dinner and then management will be totally pissed and.."

"Screw the management!" Kevin said, shrugging Howies hand off his shoulder. With a grin he added, "And I drink to that!"

The whole situation was starting to get awkward and Howie felt at a loss what to do. "Kevin come on..try to reason with me.."

The older man looked at his friend, "Reason with you? What do I have to reason with?" His voice was slurred and suddenly it looked like he was having a hard time sitting straight.

"This is so not like you to do something like that." Howie could hear himself whining, "Especially not in a situation like this."

"A situation like what?" Kevin gave him a bleary eye.

"With Nick being sick and all." Howie went silent for a second. "You know he is getting worse Kevin and..and he needs you." The words sent the older man in for a reaction.

"Need me?" He spat. "Have you guys ever thought that I�m sick and tired of always having to deal with all kinds of situations that you guys fuck up with? To be the most responsible one in the group?" He glared at Howie that looked mostly nervous, biting his lip. "The media, management and even you guys act like I�m some kind of big brother or even worse," There were a short pause before he spat out the word like it burned him, "Dad!"

Surprised over the sudden reaction Howie did his best to calm his friend down but it only served to give more fuel to the situation. "Don�t touch me. I�m an adult and I know what I�m doing and saying." His words were hard. "And if I want to act like an ass I will, there is no stopping me."

"Ok." There was nothing more Howie could say. Obviously his friend was much too trashed to reason with and this left out the option of having to lean on him for support. Standing up he decided that it was useless to try and get Kevin on a different path as the older man continued to cuss out words about his situation and how he was sick and tired of baby-sitting brats that weren�t even diaperdry.

Suddenly the calm and ever peaceful Howie had enough. "Stop it!" He yelled getting Kevin to shut up in the process. "AJ is right. You always nag and bitch about everything, saying that we�re so useless and all but have you ever stopped and think about how you�re acting?"

Kevin opened his mouth to answer, anger shining in his eyes, but Howie stopped him. "No wait..now �t�s you that has to listen to what I have to say.." Shocked over the sudden change in the Latino Kevin nodded, mouth wide open in surprise.

"We�re all tired of that attitude of yours. Ok you can be a really nice and supportive guy when it comes to that but mostly you go around and nag about things these days. Especially today." Once again Kevin did attempt to speak and was shut down by Howie's words. "I told you to listen didn�t I?"

"Huh..ok go on." Kevin looked at him confused. If he was out of character so was Howie too.

"Anyway as I was saying you can�t go around acting all moody and then not tell us what is up with you today. And even if you�re an adult you still have responsibilities to do, to the management and also to us in the group. If something is bothering you so bad that you have to drink to deal with it it�s better that you come out loud and say it, instead of hiding from it."

The older man looked at the Latino, confusion as well as surprise visible in his _expression. "Hey D where did you learn all that wisdom?"

"From you. That is what you say to us all the time."

"Oh." Kevin slapped himself in his head. "Man no wonder that I recognized the words." He tried to grin but when there were no smiles back he stopped his action. "Ok I know..I interrupted you..go on."

"There�s not much more to say but that we�re here for you if you wanna talk and if you don�t please don't make a fool of yourself by getting drunk. It will look bad on us, but mostly on you."

The last words had Kevin silent. With a sigh he set down the glass on the small table "I�ve been acting like an ass, haven�t I?"

"In a way..yes."

"Ok..yeah you�re right. It�s stupid of me to get drunk at a time like this but you know there are limits to everything and things were getting to me and I know..I slipped." He looked at the younger men with regret in his eyes. "I�ll make it better..I�ll promise."

Not listening to the drunkard Howie went on, "It would be much easier to understand you Kevin if you could come out and say what is bothering you today. Why you are such a grouch."

"Kristin left me." The words were spat out so fast that Howie barely heard them.

"She did what?"

"She left me." Kevin held his hands to his face as he started to tell his friend about the morning from hell and how he�d suspected that she cheated on him and that he was now loosing the only woman that he loved. The woman that he wanted to marry and have his children with. It was the words of a drunken man but also from someone that was really down and depressed

All the anger Howie had felt was gone with the wind and he sat down next to his friend, holding an arm around his shoulders as Kevin let out his despair. "Man that is bad" he mumbled not knowing what more to say or do.

"Yeah. Can you believe it? She cheated on me and when I called her on it she denied it. Telling me that I was a liar, that I was making up things." His shoulders were hunched and he was talking with a monotone voice. "But the worst part is that now I�m starting to regret my actions and when I try to call her all I get is the answering machine." He cried silently. "And now I don�t know what to do."

'Neither do I' thought Howie as he looked at his watch.. Now both Nick as well as Kevin had to be let out from the dinner party, different reasons since non of them were fit to attend any festivities

His thoughts were interrupted by Kevin's dark voice. "I�ve screwed up didn't I?"

Howie nodded. What else could he do? "Yeah and like I said before you can't go to a party punch drunk. There will be top business man and you�re the one that usually leads the conversation."

"Sorry." Kevin had genuine remorse.

"It�s ok buddy." Howie patted the older guy on his shoulder. "You know I�ll tell Johnny that you come up with the same disease as Nick and then he have to let both of you off."

"You think it�ll work?"

"It has to. He can�t be that stupid that he sends both of you off. It would be like sending a person into the Lions den."

"Ok." Kevin laid down on his bed. "I�m tired anyway. I�ll think I am gonna get some shut eye" With that he closed his eyes and was gone seconds later. Snoring away."

Howie shook his head. Man if he�d knew that it was in his job description to baby-sit the groups oldest and the youngest member then he would have thought twice about signing up. With that in his mind he picked up the phone, calling Johnny to inform him about the new situation...

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 14

"What the hell are you saying McLean? Is Richardson drunk? "Johnny Wright fumed as he was being told about the new situation that had come up so suddenly." Is this some kind of joke Dorough?" Turning to the older member he hoped that he would say that it was just another of those jokes that AJ and Nick could pull on him but seeing the sad look on the Latino's face made him think that it was the truth.

"No," Howie shook his head. "Me and Bone went over to his room and he was drinking and.."

"And then he passed out." AJ chipped in while he was taking in the dark haired reception clerk, flashing her a big smile. She seemed very pleased as she smiled back at him.

The manager didn�t spare his words... When he was done cussing out the older member, as well as the youngest who always got a shovel of reprimands even if he hadn�t done nothing, like this time, Howie was the first to pipe up.

"Don�t go too hard on him Johnny. Kevin�s been having a really tough time lately."

"Oh yeah? And tougher it will get if he continues acting like this." The manager showed no understanding. Glaring at them he muttered, "Right now I don�t care whatever his reasons may be since this is damned irresponsible for him to act this way. Especially when I told him specificly that Lou wanted all of you for this job. In person!"

Sadly the others could do nothing but agree. Johnny was right. This whole scene was so out of character for Kevin but there was not much that they could do about it now. Just wait for him to wake up from his drunkenness and then be responsible for his actions.

Adding more fuel to the already tensed situation AJ dropped the next brick. "B called. Nick is still feeling like hell and there is no way he�ll be fit to come to this meeting." Bad news often came in clusters.

Johnny frowned, "Don�t come and say that the blonde is ignoring orders too!" His tone sounded anything but happy. "No he�s not. I told you he was sick didn�t I?" AJ snarled.

Johnny glared back at him.

Finding it was best to clear up the situation Howie explained, "Brian told me that Nick is complaining of a very bad headache, so severe that he is throwing up and he also has a rather high temperature." Looking at his manager darting his eyes back and forth nervously he added, "Since he keeps getting worse instead of any better I think that it would be best if you sent a doctor to take a look at him."

"Oh really? You do, do you Dorough?" Johnny had a habit of naming them all by last name to prove his point of being the management of the group. "Well, then I have news for you. There is no way I�m calling a doctor to come and take a look at Carter just to hear that he has caught another of those flu bugs that he is so prone to anyway." Mumbling he added, "Hell, sometimes I wonder if the boy is a living blotting paper since every single germ seems to attach to him."

Frowning Howie looked displeased. "But Nick needs a doctor that could..."

He was cut off by his manager. "Dorough I don�t care what you think but one thing is for sure and that is if we were supposed to call for a doctor every time the kid had some kind of ailment or feeling under the weather ALL of our salaries would go to pay hideous amounts of doctors bills!" He shook his head. "So for now that is out of the question. Understood?"

Howie dropped the subject knowing when he had stretched the subject as far as he could and had reached the limit. There was a moment of silence as the manager took in what this kind of news meant for tonight's upcoming event. As it looked by now only three out of five Backstreet Boys were to show up even if Lou had been firm that they would come as a whole team.

Jonny was the one that was going to make sure that Mr. Pearlman's ideas went to action and if he fucked up, his own ass would be toast. "This is fucking unbelievable," he growled, twisting his hands in anger. "So this means that now both Richardson as well as Carter is down for the count. Lou will be really pleased."

That�s the situation yes."

When Johnny had finally come down from his anger trip he muttered in frustration, "If Littrell is dropping out too I�m kicking his ass!"

No one said anything as they were all waiting for Brian to come down to the lobby, and when he hadn�t showed up in the length of time as was common for him the manager barked to the two young men. "Ok and where the hell is Littrell then? Don�t say that he is skipping work too? "

No..No" Howie was the one to answer as AJ was being way too busy indulging in a brief conversation with the receptionist whose name was Shauna. "He�s not dropping out as a matter of fact he said that he would come right down when I called and told him that we had to leave and that he was expected at the dinner too."

"Good. " The reply was short. Looking at his watch the manager mumbled to himself, "Where the hell is he then?" That very same moment the young Kentuckian appeared around the corner which had everyone in the band breathing a sigh of relief. There hadn�t been much to show up if only two out of five members had showed up at the dinner and the executives in the entertainment industry in Canada expected more out of them. This was something Johnny was well aware of and it was also the reason why he had pressed the boys to come to the dinner even if he knew that there were reasons for them to be let off today. But Lou had been really specific that all five of them were to show up or he would get on Johnny's ass for that.

"Littrell I thought I told you to be down at the lobby at 7 pm sharp. Not 7.15! What�s your excuse for being late?"

Brian didn�t answer immediately and instead glared back at the manager, giving him a dark eye. Howie, the ever ending peace maker in the band was the one to walk up to his friend... "Thank God you came!" He smiled at him with relief.

But no smiles got returned.

"Why wouldn�t I?" He sneered. "I was told to do so, wasn�t I?"

"Yes Littrell that is called following orders!" The manger growled which had the young man opening his mouth to defend himself only to be cut off by AJ.

"What happened? Why are you late?" Shauna had to leave due to a phone call and now he was doing his best to change the conversation since his gut told him that if they didn�t stop this bickering they would be even more late to the dinner and that was something they couldn�t afford right now.

"Nick puked." Brian sounded at once very tired.

"Again?" AJ shook his head with disgust. This was getting worse and worse by the minute and they had no business leaving the kid alone in the hotel room. Kevin had been right Nick needed someone by his side.

Brian nodded."Yup."

"You gave him any more meds?" Howie asked.

"I tried." The young man ran a hand across his face in a tired gesture, "but it�s worthless. He can't seem to be able to hold anything down right now. Not even water and his headache keeps getting worse and worse."

"Oh!" The managers guard went down instantly, joined by the others worried glance. "Is he doing ok?"

Looking at the tall man Brian said slowly while doing his best to control his rising temper, "What do you expect Johnny? He�s been puking ever since we came to the hotel and now he is running a really high temperature. He�s also complaining of a headache all the time. So no the answer to your question is NO. He�s not doing alright. At all!" The tone rose in the end. "And he needs someone to look after him. A doctor!"

"Take it easy Bri," Howie said planting a comforting hand on his friends arm only to notice how his body was shaking with anger. "It won�t do you any good being this worked up, besides Johnny was just asking you a simple question. There is no need to get upset about that."

" Brian glared back but made no comment.

The manager sighed. "Brian I know that you don�t think that I care that Nick is sick but believe me I do." Even though the blonde replied with a snort he went on, "D is right. Getting us all fired up won't do anything for the kid's health. This is a stressful situation for all of us but we have to deal with it the best we can since both Richardson and now Carter are down for the count and.."

Brian stiffened. "What did you say?"

"I said that we have to deal with the situation the best way we can," Johnny repeated annoyed before continuing with his speech again.

"No..No.." Brian shook his head. "That other part about Carter and Richardson being down for the count..." His tone went shrill. "What�s wrong? Something happened to Kevin?" He was talking fast. "Don�t come and say that he got what Nick has now too."

"No."

Johnny frowned and AJ and Howie looked very uncomfortable. Howie tightened his grip on his friends arm like he was expecting him to blow up in anger. This only left Brian even more irritated and he shrugged away.

"No? You didn�t tell him?" The manager asked the two boys. AJ shook his head.

"Tell me what?" Brian wanted to know. "What haven�t you told me? What�s up with him? Why isn�t he down here?" Howie who did another attempt to cool him down by gripping his arm again but this time it was useless instead he decided to tell the truth.

"Kevin is in his hotel room. Drunk!"

"What??" Brian didn�t believe his ears. "What are you saying? Kevin is drunk?" Shaking his head he continued," I don�t believe you. That�s not something my cousin would do!" Brian often used the word cousin when he wanted to state that Kevin was close family to him and someone that he cared about very much.

"Believe what you want, but D is right." AJ said. "Your cousin is in his hotel room right now, drunk out of his witts. Trashed and passed out."

Brian was in no mood for such an answer. "You�re crazy," he yelled directing his statement towards AJ who was starting to look more and more pissed over not being believed. Eyeing him suspiciously he continued, "You�re on something or what? The last thing we need right now is you being on drugs."

It was clear that Brian wanted to remain in denial.

"Why the fuck are you accusing me of doing drugs when I�m the one sober and your cousin is in his hotel room getting drunk off his ass?" AJ�s tone was heated. His eyes suddenly dark from anger. "You�re the one that�s too afraid to cope with the truth!"

Johnny watched the scene unfold in silence as Howie was doing his best to act like the leader in the group. "There is no need for you to yell at each other and those words about drugs were totally uncalled for especially since we aren�t all alone here in if you haven�t noticed." Looking Brian in his eyes he said with a frown. "Yes, unfortunately Bone is telling the truth. I went up to his room and there he was, drinking, and I tried to talk him out of it but he was so drunk that he passed out." The young man draw back his breath. "That is why he isn�t here right now.2

"Oh." The comment was short like all the air had popped out of Brian like a balloon.

At that very moment Johnny decided to cut in."Ok ladies" he said "I don�t wanna disturb this fun situation but.." Sarcasm could be noted. "We�ve have to get going or the high up executives will be seriously upset if we don�t show up in time. And right now showing up three is a lot better than not showing up at all!" Brian wasn�t in the mood in getting interrupted. Turning to Howie he said slowly, "Suppose that Kevin is getting as drunk as you all say what do you think has happened that made him this upset." His tone was sad, questioning.

"No idea," AJ mumbled. "Probably girl trouble." He shrugged his shoulders, "Who knows? It could be just about everything."

Giving the rebel a dark eye he told him to shut up. "I really don´t know." But Howie knew. Still there was no way he would tell anyone since he�d promised Kevin and the Latino was someone who could be trusted and kept his mouth shut most of the time. It wasn´t for nothing he was ruled out to be the bands counselor. Nick had joked that if D ever got unemployed he could always be a social worker. To this Howie had smiled cause deep inside he wouldn�t have that much against it, but that was something he kept private.

"Why didn�t you do anything to stop him?" This time the tone was accusingly.

The Latino opened his mouth to answer, his eyes filled with sadness, when AJ came to his rescue, "Knock it off Brian, It�s not like the world is ending. Kevin is just drunk and it�s not like it hasn�t happened before anyway and you know it."

"It never happened when he was supposed to work." Brian cut in.

"Listen bro, I know that you�re pissed but it won�t do you any good in blowing up at D. He did all he could do and the one you should be yelling to his face is Kev and right now he isn�t in any shape to deal with getting scowled at. So therefore I suggest that you cool it down and swallow your anger. There is not much you can do about it right now anyways." AJ reasoned.

Brian glared at his younger brother with dismay. If there was one thing he disliked it was when someone told him what to do and how to act. This time it was AJ that was stepping his foot in the wrong pot. Feeling like this was a bit too much Brian lashed out with rude comments only to notice that it didn�t effect his friend.

"Chill out buddy. There is nothing you can do but relax and take it easy." For a short moment AJ laid a comforting arm around his shoulder, feeling his older bro sagging with defeat.

Johnny nodded. "Bone is right. We have to get going now or we will seriously be late." He started to walk out of the room when Brian stopped him.

"No wait!" Brian held up his hand as a sign.

"What?"

"There�s gotta be something we can do." Brian questioned. "I mean we can�t leave them all alone here. Someones gotta stay."

Johnny sighed heavily. "And who would that be? Kevin is a mature man, or at least as mature you can be for someone that is getting drunk when they have obligations to do." More sarcasm. "and what Carter is about well..it seems like the kid has caught another of his famous flu bugs and I�m sure he can manage too on his own and doesn�t have to be baby-sat all the time."

And what do you think Nick's parents would say about all of this?" Brian spat.

The other two men looked at him since bringing up such a topic was like walking on thin ice. Howie shook his head, trying to stop the 22 year old who was really upset now. He had to give Brian credit for bringing up Nick's parents but deep inside he didn�t think it would matter anyway. It wasn�t exactly like they would jump on a plane and go to see their sick son for something as common as a flu bug. Since Nick was the oldest of all of the siblings they also thought he was old enough to take care of himself which left him often without any guardians on tour. To the media it was another story, there they told them that he had always a chaperone when the truth was something else. Howie didn�t question that they didn�t love their son, no it was more that they were too involved in Nick's other siblings and were hoping that they would make it in the music industry too. He was jerked out of his thoughts when the managers loud voice boomed in the lobby, not caring if anyone heard how upset he was. That was Johnny's way of showing who was in charge and that no one was entitled to question his actions.

"You leave Nick's parents out of this!" the manager fumed. "Now get your ass going or we�re gonna be late and then you will REALLY have something to worry about! And that is called unemployment!"

Brian was being bold. "You�re threatening us? Maybe we should stay at home like the others. Then what would you do?"

"Call it what you like Litrrell and yes I am threatening you. As a matter of fact if you three don�t go to the dinner tonight you can all kiss your asses good-bye to make it on the Canadian market." The managers words were harsh.

Brian opened his mouth to interject since for some peculiar reason he always had a habit of mouthing off to the management. It was like he had this thing for authority. This time however AJ stopped him before a war broke out. "It won�t do you any good B. Come on let�s go." He whispered, We�ll deal with Johnny later.

The blonde gave him a dark eye, but for once AJ was right. There was no use in getting all worked up over the situation, finding faults and mistakes all over again even if he�d always thought that his friend was a tad too management friendly and that he suspected that Johnny taking a liking to him was because Bone was dating his daughter and that the black manager wanted him for a son in law.

Biting back a comment he shrugged and then went along with his two friends. The situation was anything but good there was not much he could do about it and all he could do was hope that both Nick and Kevin would be fine and that things would look differently when he returned from dinner. Deep inside however he had a nagging feeling that it wouldn�t and instead it would get worse!

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 15

It was hot, much hotter then he ever felt before.

Waking up from a restless sleep Nick discovered that he was drowned in his own sweat and the sheets were clinging next to his body. The heat was making it hard to breath and the pounding in his head made it impossible to think. Groaning in discomfort he did his best to clear out the cobwebs that occupied his mind and trying to adjust to the small light that shone from a lamp on the desk nearby. It hurt his eyes as well as his head and mentally he debated whether or not he had the strength to get up and turn it off.

His head felt as big as a basketball and every move he made sent several twinges radiating from his skull, down his spine all the way to his feet. It was pure hell that was what it was.

"Brian?" He called out, stunned over how weak his voice was, only to be met with silence. "Bri?" This time it was a bit louder, hoping, praying that his friend would hear him since if there was one thing he disliked it was being alone, especially when he felt as sick as he did right now. It proved to be all in vain. Either he was all alone in the hotel room or his buddy had fallen asleep on him. Hoping for the latter he slowly started to realize that no one was there for him and this made him feel a bit scared.

What would he do if he needed help? Who would now help him when he had to go to the bathroom? The way he was feeling right now pretty much everything that had to do with him doing something on his own was out of the question. It hurt too much.

In the dimmest of the fever he tried to remember why Brian had left him so sudden when it dawned upon him. Hadn�t he mentioned that they were supposed to go to some dinner party? Everything was nothing but one big blur and as he strained his head to think he winced from the pain he felt. It was unlike anything he had experienced before and as if things were not bad enough chills were starting to wrack his body again.

"Oh God."

Another twinge of pain shot through his skull, making him feel nauseous in the process. When he�d made sure that nothing worse would happen he sat up slowly in the bed. Squinting he tried to see what the time was but was too sick to even read out the numbers on the travelers clock. His neck hurt something devious and as he was doing another attempt to read the numbers he tried to figure out what he�d done to make his neck so stiff. "Most be the plane ride," he debated when his eyes could finally focus on the digits.

9:04 pm.

Too weak to sit up he fell back to the stack of pillows. All he could do was to settle down, moaning and feeling sorry for himself. He hopes that someone would hear him and come to comfort him was out of the window and right now he did all he could to stay conscious since the fever made him want to get back to sleep again. It wouldn�t have been such a bad idea if it wasn�t for the fact that his head hurt so much that all he could do was whimper and hoping, praying, that the pain would let up so he would at least be ok to get a few hours shut eye.

This whole afternoon had been one big blur and even if it had only been hours since he was starting to feel this bad it felt like an eternity. Whatever flu bug he seemed to have caught seemed to make a fast progress, making him feel worse by the minute. He had a vague memory of Brian helping him but that could also be a fiction out of his own imagination or he could have dreamed it, The foul taste in his mouth told him that his stomach had revolted to whatever bug he´d caught and the dryness in his throat made him wish for something to drink. Water.

Glancing to his side he noticed a tall glass with liquid in it standing there on the small bed table. Reaching out with shaking hands he tried to take it only to discover that he was too weak to do such a simple task and instead slumped back on the bed again. Out of frustration but also from feeling so sick tears started to form in his eyes and he did nothing to blink them away. Instead he let them fall and the more he cried the more sorry he felt for himself. More sorry than he´d ever been feeling in the past.

"I wan�t my mom," he mumbled in between his sobs. Not caring that he was sixteen and acting like a baby.

Being hundreds of miles away from home made him long for his mother's secure embrace and the more he thought about home and his family the more homesick he got. Memories of his parents taking care of him when the flu struck him in the past flashed up in front of his eyes. He longed for that home cooked chicken soup and for the comfort that his family provided. The more he thought about it the worse he felt... He had never been the one to show emotions like this to strangers and besides his family and the guys he rarely cried in the open. Tonight however he was too weak and sick to care if anyone saw or heard him.

A sudden noise caught his attention and he looked at the direction to which it had come from. Maybe it was the guys, maybe they had decided to go back to be with him. When no one entered the room he sighed heavily. The fever was doing a number on his brain and as the pounding in his head kept increasing all the time, how that could be possible, it got tougher to think straight. Knowing that he must be running a pretty high fever he recognized that tingling strange sensation in his body. It was almost like he had a hard time laying still when in reality he knew he didn�t even have the strength to lift his arm. There were also the sensation of walking on a cloud and during one of his strange thoughts he was wondering if this was how it was to be high. High on a cloud.

Smiling despite his pain he decided that he was acting silly. Another sign that he was being pretty sick since whenever he had a fever he would start thinking all these ridiculous thoughts like wondering how many flowers it was on the wall pattern or how many times he sang this or that song. That was if he wasn´t busy trying to hold on so the bed wouldn�t tip forward since dizziness was something that plagued him from time to time and it felt like he was rocking in a boat.

Nick liked boats and since his family lived by the ocean they were often going out with them. It was only one dark cloud on the sky which was, he was prone to motion sickness of all kinds and therefore often found himself suffering from that ordeal. Aaron had even told about this on an interview and Nick had about died when he read it. It was way too embarrassing to be printed out in words. But no matter how lousy he felt he still loved the water. In a strange way it had a comforting sensation and whenever the seasickness gave away the water would lull him to sleep.

The thought of being able to sleep without getting disturbed from the thunderstorms inside his skull was something that he could only dare to dream of today... He�d been dosing in and out ever since he got to lay down in the hotel room, yet it had only been a restless sleep when he had dreamed strange feverish dreams that either woke him up being cold or sweaty or nauseous. At that moment his stomach decided to do a somersault and he bent quickly for the trash can. Dry heaves wracked his body as it was trying to get rid off whatever had been bothering him all day, But he was empty from the last bouts and all he could do was heave and gag and spit while it felt like his head was going to explode.

"I can�t take this any more," he sobbed once the worst was over. He had to get some help. Someone. Somewhere. With that mission in his mind he sat up. Dizziness washed over him like a bucket of cold water and cold sweat broke out on his forehead.

"I can´t do this," he cried in desperation as he realized that this was too hard of a task to achieve. There was no way he would be able to get up and get down to the lobby and ask for someone to help him. Instead he opted for another solution and laid down on the bed again. Curling up into a ball he cried freely, hoping that someone would hear his misery and come to his rescue. But no one came and soon Nick fell into another restless slumber.

***************************************************************************************************************************************************************

The dinner was taking longer then they expected. Not only was it a three course meal they were also supposed to entertain the executives. Normally that was something they did on a drop of a dime but today it wouldn�t go as smooth as it normally did.

Johnny had told the business men that Nick and Kevin were both suffering from a nasty case of food poisoning and he hoped that they would still get a picture of what the boys sounded like.

"Let�s do Quit playing games," AJ whispered to Brian as they entered the stage. With a nod Brian took the lead and the sweet tones of the Backstreet boys, at least 3/5 of them, could be heard in the ballroom. After they were done singing acapella the crowd cheered and wanted a repeat so they sang "As long as you love me." This time it was AJ taking the lead since Nick was a no show. Even more applause and this time there was also a satisfied smile on their manager's lips. They had done pretty good even if they were a few men short.

"Well done boys," Johnny greeted them as they sat down at the table again, waiting for the desert to come. Both Howie and AJ seemed engrossed in talking to the high up executives while Brian was mostly checking his watch, trying to figure out how much longer he had to stay here before he could go back to the hotel room. Johnny had made sure that none of them could leave beforehand and excuses like "I�m tired!" wouldn�t cut it.

Brians thoughts kept wandering off to how Nick and Kevin were doing and no matter how he tried he couldn´t seem to enjoy the dinner at all. Sticking his hand in his pocket he found his cell phone, just waiting for him to pick it up and give his friends a call to make sure that they were doing alright

Leaning over to Howie who was engrossed in a conversation with one of the executives for a top leading record label he whispered, "D I have to go the bathroom..be right back." With that he stood up to leave the room, hoping that he wouldn´t make too much noise pulling the chair back.

Ok. Just make it quick. It�s soon time for desert." Howie whispered back as he continued to talk about what music groups that were hitting the Canadian market and which one to invest in if he had the money. Brian couldn�t help but grin. Howard was such a businessman and he wouldn�t be too surprised if the Latino would invest in the stock market if they would make it in the future.

"Where you´re going Rok?"

Annoyed that AJ had picked up that he was leaving he whispered red in his face. "To the bathroom." There was no way he wanted the whole world to know that he was leaving the room.

"Cool..hold on I come with you," AJ said with a grin on his lips. "I have to drain the lizard too." The rebel was talking with a loud and clear voice, not concerned that people were looking at his direction. "I�ve been dying to piss all night."

"Can´t you keep it silent," Brian muttered as he strolled out of the room, AJ hanging behind him like a tail.

"I�m embarrassing you Rok?" The younger man grinned obviously very content that he managed to get his friend to blush.

"No. The only one you embarrass is yourself."

As soon as they were out of sight to the others Brian stated. "I don´t have to go to the bathroom."

"Oh." AJ looked confused. "Then why were you going out then?"

"I�m going to call Nick." A brief moment of silence.

"You think that it�s a smart thing to do?" AJ didn�t sound too thrilled. Surprised over his friends words he mumbled, "Yeah..why wouldn�t it?"

"You're just gonna wake him up and everything and then you find out that he is still feeling like shit and that will make you feel bad cause you can�t leave the place and then.." AJ was talking fast.

"Stop it!" Brian said with a firm tone. "I don�t know if you figured it out Jay but I do care about Kaos and.."

He was cut short.

"Yeah and so do I and therefore it�s best not to call since there is not much we can do about the situation anyways."

Brian sighed. Despite what people thought AJ had a habit of being practical. " Wouldn�t you want someone to call to you if you were laying there in the hotel room feeling like crap?"

"Probably but that is not the point..If you hear that Nicky is sick as a dog, which chances are that he is, then you would want to go there and like I said I don�t think that Johnny would be too happy about it. Sometimes its better not knowing anything you know."

"Brian shook his head. "Man I swear sometimes you can be so stupid!" Closing his cell he muttered, "What do you want me to do then? Call the reception and ask them to check on him?"

AJ thought for a moment. "We gotta find something better than that but first I really gotta take that leak. Why don�t you come with me and we can figure something out."

Brian frowned but followed his friend into the men's room. The teen went into a stall, shutting the door behind him. "Man what a relief," he groaned when the sound of swirling water could be heard in the washroom.

"Gross Jay!" Brian scrunched up his nose. "I�m leaving."

"God B I swear you can be so anal sometimes. No wonder that you and Kev are cousins." AJ muttered through the stall.

"Maybe but I can�t stand here all night waiting for you to make up your mind what we should do about all of this."

There were a sound of the toilet flushing and his friend walked out zipping up his fly. Walking over to the washbasin AJ said, "I think I have a clue what we can do about the situation." Turning on the water he took his time as he washed his hands like he was waiting for Brian to grow impatient.

"Ok what?"

"You sure you wanna hear what I have to say?" AJ teased.

"Yes!" Brian grew more and more irritated by the second. "You know if you don�t wanna hear it I can.."Grinning the younger man looked like he was enjoying his older friend squirming like a worm on a hook.


"Spill it!" There were threats in Brian's tone.

"Ok..Ok." AJ held up his hands in defense. "I was just thinking that.." He talked slowly.

"Ajjjeeeeeee!" Brian whined impatiently. Patience had never been a strong side for him and today he was being more upset than normally.

"Call Kev!"

Brian didn�t believe his ears. Had Bone gone totally insane. "Call Kev? Are you for real? Didn�t you say that he was drunk and had passed out?"

"Yeah but B someone isn�t drunk forever you know." AJ wiped his hands with a paper towel. "You ready to go back? Dessert is waiting."

Ignoring that last comment Brian continue, "How can I call him when you said he passed out? I mean isn�t that the reason why he is not here tonight?" The tone was annoyed beyond belief.

The rebel grinned widely. "Wake him up then. Don�t make such a big deal about it!"

"I can�t." Brian's tone rose a knot. "besides even if I would be able to do that he would still be too drunk and not be able to go and see how Nick is feeling."

"B!" AJ sighed heavily. "I think you really underestimate your cousin. Ok Richardson can get drunk that I have to admit but he rarely suffers from hangovers." He added with a mumble, "That lucky son of a bitch."

Brian looked at him with disgust. Acting like he hadn�t seen the glare AJ went on. " You know Kev is usually a good drinker and I have seen him do his obligations like nothing had happened even after a hefty amount of alcohol the night before.."

"That�s different. Those times he was drunk the night before and wasn�t suppose to work." Brian chipped in. "Tonight he is drunk out of his senses, at least according to you."

AJ shrugged. "Doesn�t matter. Kev recovers fast." He wasn�t about to give up his idea. "Besides what do you have to loose? At least if you call him and he goes over to see Nick you have someone there for the kid. Otherwise you will have to wait until we come back and," he nodded towards the door, "judging by how much those executive seemed to like our music I�m sure that there will be a repeat performance."

Brian groaned. Bone was right. There was not much for him to loose. Picking up his cellphone he opened the lid. "Ok I�ll do it then. I�m calling him."

"Good." AJ opened the door to the men's room. "Let me know how it goes. Ok? I�m heading back to the dinner. They are soon serving dessert. And I heard it was chocolate cake and icecream." His mouth was watering.

Before Brian had a chance to react he was out of the door. Picking up a a piece of paper from his pants pocket with the phone number to the hotel on it, he dialed the number and after speaking to the receptionist he was finally connected. The signals were coming through loud and clear but no one was on the other line picking it up. Biting his fingernails, a nasty habit that he had done his best to kick, he waited for Kevin to answer.

And waited And waited.

"Please Kev," he begged loudly. "Please pick up the phone." But his prayers was not being heard. Just when he was about to hang up he heard a male voice coming through. "Kevin?" Hope lit in his eyes.

"No." the voice said. "You have been connected down to the reception and unfortunately there is no answer to Mr. Richardson's room. Can I take a message?"

Brian groaned. What was he going to do now? AJ�s plan had so carelessly been flushed down the drain. "No that´s okay," he started only to change his mind seconds later. "Yes as a matter of fact there is one thing you can do. I would appreciate it if you could go up to Mr. Richardson's room and leave a message for me that I want him to go and look after Nick." Brian could hear the confusion in the other mans voice.

"You want me to leave a message on his door?"

"No..knock on it until you get him to open. Kevin is in there. Drunk." Ooops he knew that he had said a bit too much when there were a cough on the other line. The reception clerk however found his situation fast.

"I�ll do that Mr.?"

Littrell and please tell him to give me a call as soon as he have spoken to Nick." With that they said good-bye to each other and Brian hung up. Closing his eyes he was mentally convinced that he had done the right thing. Hoping that AJ was right, that Kevin would be fit for doing such a task he walked back into the ballroom, to eat and join the others.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 16

Nick had been dosing on and off the whole evening. One time he was sweaty the next cold and he had every sign that accompanied a high fever or even worse a bad case of the flu. His headache increased all the time and moving restlessly in his bed he had a hard time finding a good position mainly because his back hurt so much and it was getting harder and harder to move his neck. The nausea that had been his companion hadn�t lessened much and he was constantly alternating between a dry and a salty salivating mouth.

It was a real effort turning his head and he had to do his best to read the small digitals on the clock since his eyes hurt all the time, especially looking at lights and his brain was all mushed from the high fever. He had a vague memory of Brian leaving him earlier on in the evening, telling him that he would be back soon, and if he wanted he could call him, but he had no idea how much time had passed since then. All he knew was that he hurt so badly and that he needed something, anything, stop this pain.

The headache was worse than all the migraines he had in his line. Combined. That wouldn�t mean little since Nick was prone to having bad migraines, a treat he inherited from his mother, especially during stressful situations and when exhaustion set in. He�d even got a prescription for it but didn�t take it very often since it made him feel all loopy, almost high, and that was not a nice feeling at all. Tonight however when he needed the bottle he�d left it back home which was in a way pretty good since the way he was feeling he would probably had digested it all. Death seemed to be the only way out form the discomfort he so cruelly seemed to be a victim off.

Shifting in his bed once again, like he�d done umpteenth of times that night, he found that the sheets were all crumpled and wet from his sweat. It was nasty and the feeling of the wet sheets clinging to his body made him feel cold again. Shivering he reached for the water glass on the bed stand that Brian had left for him only to discover that it was dry and that he didn�t have the energy to get up and get another glass. Instead he had to suffer. Bad.

There had been many times that evening when he had been close to calling Brian, asking him to come back, but he�d stopped himself every time. It would be an unprofessional act to do since the guys were working and it would only serve more fire to the rumour that Nick acted like a spoiled brat, besides he was used to handling things on his own. Being the oldest of five had left him spending too much time alone at home, much more than would be good for the media to find out. Not to mention being alone with the guys on the road. The chaperone that his parents had talked so highly of and that they said was something they aimed for was often nothing but a vision. They were much too busy taking care of his siblings and even if he knew that they wanted to be with him they couldn�t spend the time travelling because his sisters and Aaron needed them as well. This often left him with his uncle Joe but also with Johnny, Donna and sometimes Aj´s mom Denise to be in charge of him. Even though he loved having the guys with him, he would have preferred that his family followed him on the road, but had as usual very little to say on this subject. Much out of danger from loosing his spot in the group His parents depended on him since he was the one that paid their bills and made it possible for his family to live in their big home in Ruskin. There were obligations connected to being in the group and they were set to follow them. No excuses were allowed.

With tears in his eyes he decided that he had to be the loneliest person in the world when a shot of pain shot through his head, blinding him for a minute. Rolling to his side he grabbed his head and then rocked back and forth in hopes to lessen the pain. This was getting worse and worse and as if things were not bad enough another dizzy spell swept over him. Cold sweat pearled down his forehead and in between his sobbing he wished he would pass out from the pain so he would finally reach some kind of comfort.

Either that or get some help!

But no such relief came and instead the pain in his head and neck kept shooting at him like flashes and he moaned in despair. When the pain was so bad that he had a hard time breathing he reached for the phone in an attempt to call Brian. But the fever in his body made it hard for him to remember the digits and no matter how he tried he couldn�t remember the last two. In despair he had to hang up the phone and instead opted to try another way to get the relief that he wanted. Briefly he thought about calling his mom, maybe she could help him, but decided against it. He would only upset her and she had so much more to think about besides what could she do being thousands of miles away anyway? No he had to deal with this situation alone, like so many other times, if he only could find out how to get the help he needed so badly.

A thought struck him. Maybe he should call a doctor or something since surely it couldn�t be right having this kind of headache, could it?

Sitting up he cradled his head with his hands while gathering his strength to call down to the reception to ask for help. Picking up the phone he dialed zero only to find the line busy. "Oh No not that too," he groaned. Since he was feeling too weak to even talk right now he hung up which seemed like a wise decision to make at that moment. With the luck he had in communication it would probably only serve to be a misunderstanding so therefore he had to take his own actions.

Once again a wave of dizziness swept over him and with that accompanied the hated nausea and a sudden urge to throw up. Leaning over the trash can he dry heaved several times while he mentally screamed, "Please God. If you�re out there, please make this stop." He prayed in despair. He knew he had to sound pathetic yet he couldn�t help it. Puking was never fun but doing it when it felt like your brain was about to explode was pure misery. Someone up above must have been his friend since the dry heaving lessened as soon as they came and the urge to vomit passed momentarily. Once again he felt renewed strength to make it downstairs, since that was the only option he had left. He had to get down the elevator and down to the reception or at least find someone in the hallway.

While he made another attempt to stand up he noticed that his legs were very shaky and with panic he wondered if he would even make it to the door. He could never remember feeling this sick before. Not even when he had the measles as a small kid and had to stay at the hospital overnight or when he at last year�s tour suffered from pneumonia. Those times were nothing compare to this.

Taking another shaky step he felt cold sweat rinse down his neck from pure exhaustion. It was getting harder to breath and walking hurt so much that he wanted to give it all up and instead sink down on the floor, rolling himself up in a small ball on the floor and willing himself to sleep. Nick was so tired and ached so much that it would be nothing but bliss if darkness could take him away for a while, at least until the headache lessened. "I can�t take much more of this," he sobbed when he realised that there was no way he could even walk a step further, much less make it to the door and out in the hallway. Sinking down on the floor, defeat washed all over him and for the first time that day he gave up. Gave up against his sickness and crumpled up to a small heap on the cold stone floor.

"I�m so tired," he mumbled out loud, "I need to sleep. Just a little bit and Then maybe I will feel a bit better." With that he rolled into a fetal position and allowed the darkness to come over him, wrap him up in a cold dark blanket. Finally giving him the bliss he so badly needed.

******************************************************************************************************************************************************************

"I said hold your horses didn�t I?” Kevin yelled at the loud knock on his door. Wiping his eyes he did his best to grip the situation at hand. He woke up minutes ago from his drunken stupor by someone furiously knocking on the door. At first he�d done his best to ignore the intruder but since the knocker seemed to be awful persistent he had no other option then get up and see what they wanted.

It was probably Howie or Brian to come and check up on him. They were the bands care takers and for some strange reason felt it was their task to look after everyone in the band and make sure they were in good shape. Kevin snorted. It could be so annoying sometimes. Another knock on the door and then a "Mister?" could be heard.

With a groan Kevin sat up on the sofa. A loud throbbing sensation in his head, as well as the taste of what could have been him swallowing a rodent, told him that he�d fallen asleep drunk off his ass and was now suffering the nasty consequences of indulging liquid beverages. In other words being drunk as hell.

Grabbing his jeans from the chair he did his best to jump into them as fast as he could but it was not easy since he was still intoxicated and felt a bit wobbly. Then finally he made his way towards the door, even if that was a hard task to achieve. Steadying himself against the doorpost he opened it only to stand face to face with one of the hotels portieres.

"Mr Richardson?" The man asked, dressed in the hotels uniform. The man took in Kevin from top to bottom and it was no doubt that he noticed the drunken condition that the young man was in.

"What do you want?" He sneered in a much too slurred voice to pass for just being a little buzzed. He was in no mood being played with since his head hurt so bad that he was starting to think that a sledge hammer was doing its best to hammer through his skull. "What the hell did I drink?" he pondered, closing his eyes briefly.

Instead of answering his question the man said, "Mr Richardson do you know a man named Mr Littrell?"

Upon hearing his cousins name being mentioned Kevin could feel his heart beating faster and his pulse raised a knot. "Yes. He's my cousin. Why?" Drawing back his breath he added, “Did something happen? An accident?” His throat constricted with fear.

"No," The portiere reassured. "It�s nothing like that." Then he started to explain the reason for his visit and when Kevin heard that it was Brian who had called him to make sure he checked up on Nick he shook his head in disgust.

“Figures.” This was so much like Brian. Feeling his temper rising he muttered to himself that it was a typical act of his cousin to check up on HIM and not Nick. 'I bet that he is pissed over me getting drunk and all,' he decided and then firmly told the portiere that he would take care of things before shoving the portiere out of his room and closing the door with a slam.

Once he was alone in the hotel room he thought about calling Brian and ask him what the fuck he was doing when his body decided otherwise and his stomach starting doing somersaults. Swallowing hard he did his best to will the nausea to go away but when that didn�t help he found himself head over heals in the bathroom emptying his stomach from the alcohol. After three violent bouts he felt well enough to leave the bathroom, this time feeling so much better and a lot more sober too.

Now when part of the scotch was out of his system and he was able to think more clearly shame rinsed all over him. What had he done? Getting drunk when he was suppose to work was not something he�d done very often in the past but then it was not an ordinary day either. The fight with Kristin bothered him more than he would admit but it was no excuse for him to get this drunk either. His behaviour today was very much out of character and he wished it had never happened. He felt like he�d let the guys down and he guessed that they would be just as mad at him as the management would be. He�d acted very unprofessional and also jeopardized the group’s future by missing out on the dinner.

Returning back from his guilt trip he was suddenly reminded of what the portiere had told him earlier. That Brian had called and wanted him to check up on Nick. That had to mean that the kid at least got to stay at the hotel since he had a vague memory of the teen being very ill. With a sigh he pulled on his shoes and then grabbed a sweatshirt. Luckily Kevin had the spare key to Brian and Nick�s room since they often slept in, especially Nick, and he was supposed to go and wake them up. Ok it wasn�t exactly the full truth since in reality it was Howie who did the wake up calls, but tonight, for some strange reason, D had left him the key card and that was before he started to drench his sorrows in the bottle. It was like the Latino had a notion that something bad would happen.

His headache as well as the unsure feeling in his stomach reminded him that he was battling one hell of a hangover and after throwing down a couple of Advil�s together with a cold glass of water he thought about calling Brian, only to decide against it the next minute. They were probably still busy at the dinner besides it would do him no good to call his friend since it would only upset his cousin further.

Opening the door to the hallway he found that it was silent outside and the lighting was dusk. It was an old hotel and it showed on the floors red carpeting which looked like it had seen better days. Every step he took made him wish that he had never touched those bottles and for a moment he feared that he would have to go back to his room for another bout of nausea. Luckily it passed. Hangover was a bitch but being hangover by scotch was a true nightmare and he swore that he would never again touch a drop, at least not in the closest range of time.

Stopping outside Nick�s room he knocked softly, waiting for Nick to open up. When no response could be heard he knocked a bit harder. The kid had been suffering from a fever so he wouldn�t be too surprised if he was asleep and didn�t hear him. When no signs of movement could be heard from the inside Kevin pulled the key card from his pocket and stuck it into the door. He waited a few moments while the card clicked green and then opened the door up slowly.

It was dusk, almost dark in the room and an unpleasant smell hit his nostrils. The smell of sickness. Frowning he opened the door a bit further and walked inside. At the first sight the room appeared empty. Almost deserted.

"Nick? Hello? You in there?" He called out. No one responded. "Weird,"he muttered. 'I thought that Nick didn�t go to the dinner why else would Brian call me?' His thoughts were interrupted when his foot suddenly connected with something large and soft on the floor. Turning on the lamp he was met with a sight he�d never forget!

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 17

"Please God," Kevin whispered. "Please say that he isn’t dead!" There on the floor was Nick. He was curled up into a heap, pale as a sheet, looking more dead than alive. Gasping, the older boy sank down next to his brother, feeling his pulse. It was steady, a bit high which would be expected since he was suffering from a fever. Relief flooded over him. The kid was just asleep, not passed out or even worse dead. But his relief didn’t last long when his hand connected with Nick’s warm skin.

"Oh man you’re really burning up!" he gasped when he felt the fever radiate through his fingers. The kid was hot as a stove. Quickly he scooted on his feet and then ran into the bathroom to get a wet towel. Coming back he placed it over his friend’s forehead only to be met with a small moan seconds later.

"Nick? Nicky you’re awake?" Kevin mumbled softly.

"Mo..Mom? Dad?" The teen opened his glazed blue eyes, looking confused at him. "Brian?"

"No it’s me. Kevin." The older man did his best not to act worried but his furrowed eyebrow told Nick otherwise.

Licking his lips Nick searched for an answer. "What are you do..doing here?"

Ignoring his friend's question the older man did his best not to act worried but his frown told Nick otherwise. "How you doin' little man?" He hadn’t called Nick that for ages.

"No..Not so good,” his friend croaked then coughed briefly, wincing at the pain that radiated through his head. He moaned, "My head hurts and my back and my eyes." Closing his eyes again he mumbled, "Please turn off that lamp. It hurts my eyes so much."

"It does?" Kevin asked, and then quickly did as his friend asked of him. "I guess being sensitive to light has to do with that high fever of yours." He was always trying to find reasonable explanations to everything.

"Mmmm..Maybe." Nick rubbed his forehead.

"You took any medications for that headache recently? Tylenol? Something else?"

"I don’t think so. I don’t remember." Nicks voice was weak. "It wouldn’t help much anyways. It won’t stay down. Nothing’s staying down." He whimpered when another flash of pain shot through his skull like a bullet. "You have no idea how bad this is."

"Is it like when you have those bad migraines?" Kevin asked carefully.

"No worse. Much worse." He coughed, gagging. "I feel sick."

Kevin’s eyes widened. "You gonna throw up?" He rose on his feet to fetch the trashcan.

"No." Nick stopped him with his arm. "There is nothing in my stomach to throw up from. I just feel sick. Dizzy." He rolled to his side again.

"Ok." Kevin watched his friend in silence for a moment, the alcohol making it hard to think straight. "Why are you laying on the floor and not in bed? You passed out?" Concern was evident in his tone.

"I don’t know but don’t think so. "Nick winced while trying to remember why he was laying curled up in a ball, freezing his guts out on the hard stone floor in a hotel room. "I guess I fell asleep or something, you know when I tried to get some help." It was hard to talk; the pain prevented him from thinking clearly.

Kevin furrowed his eyebrows."You�ve actually tried to get help? Real help? Like a doctor?"

"Mmm." Nick nodded but regretted his movement seconds later. "This hu..hurts so badly." He did his best to blink away the tears but it was useless since they kept rolling down his cheek. The teen gasped when another string of hot searing pain struck him, blinding him momentarily.

Upon seeing his friend in such discomfort Kevin felt panic dwell up inside him. . Usually he was the one that could handle emergency situations but today, maybe due to the amount of liquor he had inhaled, he couldn’t think straight and therefore had no idea how what to do. "Heure Buddy," he reached out his hand. "Let me help you back to bed."

The teen yelped when he tried moving him. "Nooo.. Don�t touch me. It hurts and I wanna stay here" He curled into a ball again.

"But you can�t lay on the floor. You’ll get cold and then make yourself sick again.” Kevin reasoned while he making another attempt to get him up from the floor.

"No. leave me alone!" He shrugged the hand off. "It’s so much cooler down here," he mumbled placing his cheek against the floor, hoping for some comfort. "I’m so hot."

"That’s the fever talking. Listen Nick, I know that you feel bad, but you'll just end up feeling worse if you don’t let me help you back in bed." He did his best to get Nick to sit up but when there was no co operation from his friend he simply lifted him up in his arms. Surprised over how light the kid felt he carried him into the bed.

Nick protested widely. "You don’t have to do that Kev. I’m not a baby you know."

"I know Nick. Believe me I know." Kevin chuckled softly. "But you’re too sick to walk and like I said you need to get off the floor. Right now."

"'k." Nick gave up a little too fast for Kevin’s liking, which told him that he was feeling worse than he let on. As soon as he was settled back in bed Nick rolled to his side and then tried to pull the sheets up to his neck. This action failed when his hand was shaking too much to accomplish such a task.

"Let me do that for you," Kevin offered and then pulled the blanket over his sick friend. "Do you know if Brian took your temp before he left?"

"Eh..No idea." Nick looked up with an apologetic expression, like he was feeling embarrassed for not remembering much from the evening.

"That’s Ok." Kevin smiled gently at him and stroking back a strand of sweaty hair from his friend’s face he continued, "You’re really hot. I’m guessing that your fever is pretty high right now with or without a temp to confirm it." He picked up the wet towel and placed it on his forehead. "We need to get it down."

Nick blinked at him. "Kevin?"

"Yes?"

"How come you’re not with them? You know at the promotion dinner?" It was strenuous to talk but his friend seemed urgent to get an answer to his question.

Swallowing hard Kevin tried to think of something to say. "Because..Beacuse I decided to stay in."

"Oh! You did that for me?” Nicks eyes lit up for a second.

Not wanting to spoil the hope that he’d stayed in for him Kevin avoided the answer. "You thirsty? You want me to get you a glass of cold water?" He got up and walked to the bathroom, glass in hand. "I’ll be right back."

When he was in the comfort of the bathroom, all alone, he stared at the mirror. "You’re such a bastard do you know that Kevin?" he said loudly to the reflection in the mirror. Never before had he felt so bad for drinking, but then he was the one that made sure that he never screwed up either. He felt stupid for telling Nick the real reason for him missing out on dinner. That he’d been drunk off his ass!

Coming back with the fresh glass of water he placed it on the bed stand.

Nick, not satisfied with his sudden escape asked, "Why Kev? Why did you stay?" Sniffing in the air he stopped himself. "It smells like alcohol in here." His eyes widened. "You have been drinking haven’t you? That was the reason for staying in!" There was accusation in his tone. "You didn’t do it for me. You’re just being drunk!" He spat out the words with disgust.

The older man swallowed hard. He didn’t like the tone Nick used when he brought up the subject or his disappointed expression when it dawned upon him the real reason why Kevin was there. He hadn’t thought that the teen had noticed the smell, especially not since he had already purged most of the alcohol out of his system. While trying to find something to say Nick whimpered loudly. The attacks were coming closer now.

"It hurts. It hurts..My head..Oh man please make it to stop," he moaned, rocking back and forth trying to sooth the discomfort he was feeling. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he kept whimpering over and over again for the pain to stop.

Not being able to stand seeing his little brother this sick Kevin decided to take action. Picking up the phone he called down to the reception.

"What are you doing?" Nick panted when the worst spell had passed.

"I’m calling the hotel doctor." Kevin was short with his words and when the younger man started to object he held up his hand to stop him, "Hush it’ll be just fine. You'll see." Bedside manner had never been Kevin Richardson’s strong side. Nick didn’t have a chance to respond since the clerk downstairs answered on the other line and Kevin started explaining that he needed to be in contact with a doctor, and fast.

He was told that the hotel doctor would call him as soon as he got in and satisfied with that Kevin hung up.

"Was that Brian?" the teen asked suddenly, acting like he hadn�t listened to a word Kevin had said.

"No. Brian’s still at the dinner. The clerk is going to leave a message for the doctor and then he will call soon." The older man frowned. Nick was acting weird.

"Dinner?" It was like the pain had erased Nick’s memory more than usual.

The question surprised Kevin greatly. "Yes you know the promotion dinner that the fella’s are at this evening." He was doing his best to be patient even if he felt more and more worried over Nick’s strange and erratic behaviour.

"Oh yeah." A blush crept onto the teens pale cheeks. "I�ve forgotten. Sorry."

"That’s all right." Kevin smiled but deep inside he was worried. Nick acted a bit confused from time to time. More confused than he was usually and he suspected that it had to have something to do with the high fever he ran. "The doctor will be here soon and meanwhile you should try and get some sleep. You sure look like you need it. After tucking Nick in, like he’d done when he was younger and homesick, Kevin sat down in the armchair. The alcohol as well as the day�� s hectic events made themselves known and he closed his eyes while waiting for the doctor to call. Before he knew it he’d dosed off.

What seemed like seconds but had to be more than half an hour later, judging by the time on the clock, Kevin was awakened by a loud ringing. Confused, disoriented, he looked around in the dark room when he realised it was the phone that woke him up. Fumbling out of the chair he heard a weak voice mumble from the bed, "Phone’s ringing."

Glancing at Nick’s direction he found his friend looking at him, eyes glazed and cheeks red from fever. "You awake?" He murmured, while picking up the phone and answering the call.

"You snore." The word said it all.

Kevin had no time to defend himself since it was the hotel doctor on the other line. At first the doctor didn’t seem too concerned when the older man explained about his Nicks flu like symptoms but when he mentioned the severe headache, sensitivity to light, stiff neck and confusion the doctor told him that he would be up immediately and then hung up.

"That was fast," Nick mumbled when Kevin was done talking. "What did he say?"

"He's coming up straight away." The Kentuckian was short in his words but concern filled his mind. He didn’t like the way the doctor had sounded and he was starting to think that maybe Nick was sicker than he first got the impression of. He was also a bit scared what would happen when it came out that he had been drinking and there was no saying what would happen if the media would find out about this incident.

A loud knock was heard minutes later. ‘That was fast!' He thought while Kevin opened the door. Outside was a tall dark man, dressed in a suit and the only thing that revealed he was a doctor was the bag he was holding in one hand and the legitimation in the other.

"Good evening. I’m Dr Blake," he presented himself; "I presume that you are Mr Richardson?"


"Ye..Yes." Kevin reached out his hand too.

"Good. I’m sorry that I’m coming dressed like this but I was at this dinner party in the hotel when I got the call." Noticing Kevin’s frown he added, "It’s my night off actually but luckily I haven’t been drinking any of the cocktails they served since I’m the driver for the night." He chuckled.

"Ok." Kevin felt a bit uneasy. Did the doctor notice that he had been drinking? Then he decided that if he did he did a good job hiding it and there would probably be no harm done. But one could never be too careful.

Stepping inside with one foot the doctor spared no time in getting down to the point. "Where is that sick young man you were telling me about?"

"He’s over there." Kevin pointed at the bed where Nick lay and the doctor stepped up to the kid.

"Hey there," he said and sat down on the bed next to the teenager. "So you’re the one that is sick tonight huh?" He smiled gently while feeling on Nick’s forehead. "You’ve got yourself quite a fever there kiddo."

Nick nodded quietly. He’d never liked doctors very much. They only tend to ask stupid questions and probe him in places he would rather forget existed.

"I know it most suck, doesn’t it?"

"Yeah."

"Well then Nickolas," the older man started only to be cut off by Nick moments later.

"Nick. It’s Nick!" the teen corrected him. "And that," he pointed at Kevin. "That’s Kev!"

"Ok Nick then," the doctor chuckled. "Kev here..."

"Kevin!" Kevin corrected. He had never liked when anyone called him Kev and certainly not by someone that he hardly knew at all.

"I�m sorry, ok Kevin then." The doctor seemed a bit annoyed but he was doing his best to stay patient. It was probably no fun being dragged from a dinner party to go on a sick call anyway so Kevin didn’t blame him for sounding uninterested. "He told me on the phone that you have been feeling sick all day, complaining of a headache so bad that it makes you want to pass out. Is that correct?"

"I guess."

"Can you then tell me something about the symptoms that you’re experiencing?" The doctor went on.

"Sure."

Nick tried sitting up on his elbows but was instantly pushed back by both the doctor and Kevin. "No Nick. You need the rest. Just tell the doctor what hurts the most," Kevin advised.

"Oh Ok." To his surprise Kevin noticed that his friend obeyed easy tonight and this was not something he did very often. As a matter of fact he could be quite a stubborn head from time to time. As well as a pain in the ass!

"I’ve got this mother of a headache." Kevin frowned upon the selection of words but said nothing to stop him. "It’s really bad at sometimes and it feels like my head is about to burst! You know explode!"

"It is?" The doctor frowned while he felt around Nick’s temples. "How would you describe the pain? Does it come and go? Is it sticking like pain or is it a more dull pain?"

"It feels like flashes being ripped through my skull. And it comes in attacks." Nick could be so dramatic when he wanted and he usually did it without an eye twitch.

"That bad huh? Ok then what number would you says it is on a scale from one to ten?" He continued to feel on Nicks head, especially on the base of his skull. "Does it hurt when I put pressure there?" He asked pressing on a spot.

"Not really. It’s kind of numb and on the scale..I don’t now. Sometimes an eight but then it’s a twelve!"

"When would you say it started?"

Kevin felt like he had to butt in.”Nick started to complain about a headache I think around dinner time this evening." He was instantly cut short by Nick who corrected him.

"I’ve had a headache since last night but it only started to get worse this evening."

Kevin felt like a fool. He knew he had been very annoyed with the teen but if he had known that Nick was this sick he would have gone easier on him. But then his friend often complained about one ailment or the other and it was not easy to know when he was really sick, was it?"

After the doctor was done asking about his headache he continued asking other questions. "Are there any other symptoms beside a headache?"

"Yeah." The teen was starting to get tired. He wasn’t very talkative tonight.

”Ok. Can you describe them for me then?" The doctor was doing his best being patient and Kevin admired him for it. It was not an easy task to take on Nick when he was not feeling one hundred percent. He either complained or clamped up like a shell and you couldn’t get out anything from him. Tonight he was doing the shell version.

"I feel nauseous all the time and I’ve been throwing up all evening and then my neck is really sore." Nick paused briefly, "It’s kind of stiff and it hurts when I move. But it can be because I was sitting kind of weird in the plane earlier this morning or maybe because I had to do those stupid dance moves while on rehearsal the other day." He was trying to come up with possible explanations for his on set of symptoms.

The doctor looked confused. "Dance moves? You’re in a circus? A theatre? Dancers?"

Kevin threw him a glare while Nick was too tired to even lift his eyes any more. "We’re in a pop group. The Backstreet Boys, if you ever heard of them," he explained.

"Yeah..That�s right." The doctor smiled at once. "I thought I had seen you guys somewhere. My teenage daughter just loves you. She has your poster up in her room."

"That’s nice." If Nick seemed to like this guy Kevin did not. He was just too annoying and Kevin had never been a fan of annoying people. Nick on the other hand seemed to be drawn to them. The doctor didn’t seem to acknowledge his words instead he concentrated feeling Nicks neck and asking when and where it hurt.

After Nick had told him about how his eyes hurt and Kevin had filled in on that he thought the teen was confused at times not to mention the dizzy spells that he seemed to suffer from the doctor said with a frown. "I think I have a handle on things but I would like to do a brief examination on you as well as take your temperature. You think you can sit up for a bit and take off your t-shirt I want to listen to your chest?"

"Sure." With the help of Kevin Nick did his best to sit up but when he did the throbbing in his head seemed to increase as well as the pain in his back. He made a face that the doctor instantly took notice of

"Your head hurts more when you sit up?"

"Mmmm..A bit.. Yeah..But my..my back hurts too."

"Your back? Ok." The older man picked up his stethoscope and then said, "This will be a bit cold on you but I'll try to make it fast. Breathe in when I say so and then breathe out when I tell you to do that."

"Uh huh." Kevin could see how the teen tensed when the cold object was pressed against his warm skin. Nick shivered slightly.

"That sounds good," the doctor mumbled to himself. "No congestion in your lungs. Have you had a cold recently?"

Nick nodded.

"When doesn’t he?" Kevin muttered from his side. He was starting to get annoyed over the fact that the doctor didn’t say anything of substance and he wanted to know what kind of ailment his friend was suffering from. "Doctor what’s the matter with him? What kind of nasty bug have he caught this time?"

Frowning, the doctor ignored the question and instead said, "Nick, I’m going to feel your glands and then I’m going to shine with this torch." He pulled up a small black flashlight. "In your eyes. I want you to say if it hurts. Ok?"

"'k." Nick did like he said and flinched when the light hit his eyes. "Ouch that hurt." he shielded away.

With furrowed eyes the doctor put the device away and scribbled something down in his note book. "You doing just fine Nick," he said gently. "Now I’m going to take a blood pressure on you since your pulse seems to be a bit raised, but that can be because of the high fever you seemed to be suffering from. Is that ok?" Dr Blake was taking it all very pedagogical and if Kevin hadn’t been so pre occupied with his own thoughts that the doctor would ask him something about him drinking he actually could have thought that he wasn’t too bad..

When the examination was almost over the doctor pulled out a thermometer from his bag. "I’m done soon Nick, and then you can lie down and rest, but first I need to take your temperature. The good thing however is that you can lie down during that procedure." He placed it in the teen’s mouth before Nick had a chance to object. Then they all waited in silence, the doctor scribbling down notes on his pad, Kevin waiting to hear some news and Nick waiting for this whole torture to be over and done with.

Three minutes later the device beeped and the doctor pulled it out of Nick’s mouth. Reading it they could both see a frown etched on his forehead. "Nick, do you know if you have a low or a high temperature normally?"

"Huh?" Nick looked like a question mark.

"I mean do you get high fevers very easily?"

"He’s a low temp I guess.” I think he is rather prone to high temps, aren�t you Nick?" Kev filled in. He felt like a parent giving away all this information. And the only reason for him being able to do that was because he got himself drunk. Life could play its weird game sometimes.

"I don’t know. I don’t remember. My head hurts too much to think." Nick moaned, not wanting to get into a conversation any more than he had to do.

"That’s all right." The doctor smiled. "It’s perfectly understandable since you have a temperature of 103.8."

Kevin gasped. "What?" He thought Nick felt warm but not THAT warm.

Nick on the other hand acted like he hadn’t heard a word that had been said. His eyelids were heavy and they could both see that it was a struggle holding them up. In other words Nick Carter was about to fall asleep.

"It isn’t the flu then is it?" Kevin said with fear in his eyes.

Ignoring the Kentuckian Doctor Blake went on, but this time only turning to his sick patient. "Nick I can tell you feel really sick and judging from what you told me about the headache, the pain in your neck and back and also the high fever I have a clue what you’re suffering from. However I won’t beat around the bush young man and the condition you describe to me sounds like it can be serious."

"Serious? You mean really serious?" Kevin repeated, sounding like a parrot.

This time the doctor looked at Kevin as well. "I don’t want to take any chances and therefore I want you Nickolas to go to the hospital. I’m going to call for an ambulance to take you down there."

Kevin was taking in the words while Nick uttered weakly, "A hospital? You think that’s really necessary? What is he suffering from that can be that bad?"

"Yes I do." The doctor looked sternly at him. "If this is what I think it is, and judging from the symptoms you described it can very well be, you would need to perform some tests and then you might need medical treatment at the hospital depending what the results show."

Nick looked pale, paler then he did before and he swallowed hard. Not knowing what to say Kevin filled in for him, "What do you think it can be then? What are you suspecting Doctor?"

Looking at both of the young men the doctor drew his breath back before saying in a serious tone. "It’s not confirmed with tests so therefore my words can’t be seen as one hundred percent positive and I can be wrong.." He dragged out on his words getting Kevin even more impatient then he used to be.

"Yes?"

”Judging from your symptoms I do believe however that you Nickolas could have meningitis."

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 18

"No messages?"

Brian turned on his cell phone again after they were done with their short stage performance. They were standing outside in the hall since Johnny had made it perfectly clear that no cell phones were allowed in the dining area.

"No. Nothing." The twenty one year old shook his head. "That portiere has left me a message though, saying that he got Kevin up and that Mr Richardson will take care of things." He sighed, rubbing his hand tiredly over his eyes. "You would at least think that Kev would call, but nope!" There was a disappointed expression on his face.

"He's prolly just pissed that you called that guy and asked him to wake him up and all." AJ said being as comforting as he could be. "But don’t worry, I spoke to Johnny and he said that we won’t be here for long." He grinned widely. "Then you can go back to the hotel and spend your night with a pukey Nicky. Sounds like loads of fun, huh?"

Brian glared back. "It’s not Nick’s fault that he is sick again. He can’t help it you know."

"Yeah." But admit it; it’s getting kind of old. He catching every damn bug there is on this universe."

"It’s the tight schedule we have. "We never get time to stop and relax anymore and this leads to those viruses that can’t be beat down."

"Yeah I think you’re right. Johnny and Lou, especially Lou is running us too damned hard like we’re some kind of animals."

Before Brian had a chance to comment Howie barged in. "There you are! Johnny has been looking for you." Noticing his friend’s gloomy faces he added, "Why are you standing out here all alone? What are you talking about?"

Looking at each other Brian and AJ said in unison," Nick!" It was like the name explained it all.

"Oh." Howie went silent. "What did he do now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?" The Latino looked confused. "Then why are you two standing out here in the hallway? Johnny wants us back inside again. He says that we’re going to wrap it up soon but until then we have duties to tend to. Obligations."

AJ muttered in disgust, "Those damned obligations." He was really in a mood. Turning to Brian he asked, "So you’re gonna call him or not?"

Brian shrugged. "I don’t know."

"I think you should."

"Call who? What’s up with all of you tonight?" Howie looked confused, shaking his head. "Come on let’s get back inside."

" Kevin. That’s who we’re calling." AJ explained. "Listen D. Rok called this guy who would wake Kevin up since he was still passed out and then B wanted him to go and check on Kaos you know. In case he was still sick and all." He paused briefly. "And now we’re waiting for Kev to call in."

"Uh huh." Howie looked like he’d understood about half of it since AJ had a habit of talking fast as always. "Did he call then?"

AJ shook his head like he thought the older man was nothing but stupid while Brian sighed. "Nope. And there were no messages either." "Oh." Howie thought for a while before he said in a false, cheerful tone. "B look at it from this side. No calls and no messages are good news."

"Huh?"

"Kaos is probably still asleep and knowing Kevin he didn’t think it was necessary to call in and disturb us." He looked pleased with his own answer. "Yes that has to be it!"

"Maybe or he is still passed out." AJ sputtered, receiving a dark eye from his friend.

Ignoring AJ�s last comment Howie turned to Brian, "Besides you turned your phone off so how would you know that he hasn’t tried calling you?" Putting his arm around his friends shoulder he added, "Come on buddy let’s get back inside again. Don’t you worry. I’m sure thing’s will turn up just fine."

"'k." Brian was about to follow D when his cell phone broke the silence. Instantly everyone looked at the phone, almost like it was something devious and no one wanted to pick it up.

"You’re going to answer or what?" AJ asked when Brian had stared at it long enough. "It might be Kevin!"

Nodding the Kentuckian clicked his cell phone open. "Brian here."

"B it’s me. Kevin." His cousin’s dark voice boomed on the other line. "I need to talk to Johnny. Can you put him on for me? It’s urgent.

"Kevin! Why didn’t you call earlier?" Brian burst out, accusations evident in his tone.

"I really don’t have time to talk right now." He sounded stressed. "Just get Johnny for me. Ok?"

Ignoring his friend’s request he went on, "You’re still at the hotel? How’s Nick? Did you get to talk to him?" The questions were many. Brian could hear someone talking in the background. "Who’s there with you? A girl?" Nothing surprised him anymore concerning his cousin. Not after that drunk stunt he pulled earlier on.

"No!" Kevin snapped. ”It’s not a girl. I�m..I�m in an ambulance." A gasp could be heard from his cousin when he added quickly, "Nick spiked a rather high fever so I’m taking him to the hospital."

"Oh no. Is he all right?" Brian knew that the words sounded dumb, after all his friend was taking their little brother to the hospital but he had to know that it wasn’t something serious. The others looked his way, waiting for some kind of news.

Ignoring the last question Kevin went on. "I need to talk to Johnny since he is the one in charge of him. Can you put him on for me? Now?" This time he pleaded.

"Is he all right? Is it bad?" Brian repeated, still in shock. The words only spiked more curiosity from his friends and when AJ mouthed, "What is it?" but Brian chooses to ignore it.

"He’s as ok as he can be under these circumstances and to answer your second question; the doctor thinks it might be meningitis." Kevin sounded at once very tired and Brian noticed that there was not much trace from his previous drunkenness.

"What? You sure?" Brian’s tone went shrill.

"Ye..Oh I don’t know." His cousin acted stressed again. "Listen I really can’t talk right now. We’re soon at the hospital and I have to follow Nicky inside so can you go and get Johnny for me?" He paused before booming, "NOW. IT�S URGENT!!! This time it was more of a demand than a request.

"Ok." The younger man turned to Howie who was waiting together with AJ anxiously for an answer. "D can you get Johnny for me? Kevin wants to talk to him and he says it’s urgent."

"What is it? Something serious?" AJ cut in but Brian shook his head.

"I can’t say right now but I’ll tell you guys later. For now just go and get him." "But..but."Howie started when Brian interrupted him.

”Stop asking so many questions. I told you it was urgent didn’t I?" He looked at Howie. ”Hurry up, I’ll explain later." It had to be either the tone in his younger friend’s voice or his expression in his eyes that made the Latino realise the seriousness since he went inside to get the manager without further questioning.

AJ on the other hand felt inclined to know what was going on. "B what’s up with you? Something happened with Nick? Why does Kev wanna speak to Johnny? What’s so urgent?"

Brian held up a hand. "Not now Bone."

Returning back to his talk with Kevin his cousin instantly asked him,”You got a hold of Johnny for me?"

"No. Not yet."

There was a loud groan on the other line. "Brian I don’t have time for this."

"D is getting him." Brian said before he continued. "So tell me about Nick. What happened? How is he? Is he conscious?" Upon mentioning that last word AJ raised his eyebrows. It was clear that it bothered him not knowing what went on with his little bro. Brian had a hard time talking. It felt like his words stocked up in his throat but still he had to find out how bad it was. How sick Nick was.

"Listen Bri I can’t talk right now. We’ve arrived at the hospital now and I have to follow Nick inside. But ask Johnny to call me at the..at... hell I don’t know where we are... hold on." He disappeared.

Brian bit his nails, nervously. This was a habit he had when things were getting too stressed out or he was nervous about something. Like right now. He could hear his cousin asking something to the drivers and it felt like an eternity before he came back.

"Tell Johnny to call me at Quebec General Hospital. OK? I gotta go." Then he hung, leaving Brian standing there. Shocked.

AJ was the one to get his thoughts back in track. ”What happened? Tell me!" The rebel urged, shaking his arm. "What’s up with Nick?"

"He..he... For some reason the words were stocked up in his throat, leaving him with a hard time talking. "Kevin is on his way to the hospital."

"Oh shit!" The younger mans face fell. "Is it bad?"

"I don’t know." Brian rubbed his temples, fending off an impending headache. "But Kevin told me that the doctor thought he might have meningitis."

"Man." There was a brief pause when AJ took in the words. "Meningitis you say? Isn’t that something you die from?"

"Not sure but..but I..I guess you can do that. Yes." Brian ran his had through his hair, suddenly feeling very tired. Drained. The news came like a slap in the face. Violent and unexpected.

AJ thought for a moment before he said. "Did Kev say what hospital they went to?"

"Mmm." Brian nodded. "Why?"

"'cause we gotta get to them." The rebel looked like he had the greatest idea all of a sudden. ”Let’s get a cab!"

"You’re crazy! We can’t do that!" Brian objected when Howie returned, Johnny in a tow. The black manager looked nothing but pleased.

"What the hell does this mean Littrell and McLean?" Why are you standing out here like two idiots when you are supposed to be inside entertaining the dinner guests? Don’t you know by now that this is a job and you can’t just skip work because you feel like it?" The manager barked.

"Nick’s at the hospital." AJ spat before Johnny had a chance to say anything more.

"What?" Johnny looked like he didn’t believe his ears and neither did Howie. "If that’s your idea of a joke McLean it’s not funny."

"It’s not a joke." Brian said slowly," Jay is telling the truth. Kevin just called from an ambulance and he is taking Nick to the hospital."

"The hospital?" Johnny boomed. "What kind of crap is that? Because of a flu bug?"

"No." Brian shook his head. "They spoke to a doctor and.."

Johnny interrupted him. "What you’re saying boy? Did Richardson call a doctor? Who gave him that kind of permission?" The manager was very upset now. Muttering he went on, "That costs plenty of money and I wonder how he thought we can afford to pay that." "If you paid attention to what B is trying to say here and not interrupting all the time you would know why Nick is going to a hospital." AJ was also very upset too.

Johnny glared at him, and then turned his attention back to Brian. "Ok spill it. What happened?"

"Yes," Howie piped up. "Why is Nick at the hospital?"

"His got meningitis!"

"What? What does he have?" The manger boomed.

"You heard me; He's got that disease, right B?" AJ turned towards his friend.

"Yes. At least that is what the doctor thinks it can be." His voice was quiet as he spoke. "It’s kind of bad. I think."

Once Johnny had taken in the news he said to them. "Ok this is what we will do. I’ll call down to the hospital like you said Kevin wanted me to do and meanwhile you guys go back to the hotel...”

"The hotel why?" AJ asked in surprise.

"Yes why? I want to go to the hospital too." Brian sounded like a small kid. Johnny shook his head.

"No I don’t want that much attention over this. Maybe it’s nothing, just a flu bug and then it’s unnecessary that media and the fans finds out. Therefore I would like us to keep a low profile until we know for sure what Nick is suffering from and meanwhile I will try and sort some things out." "Sort what out?" This time it was AJ who interrupted.

"God why do you guys keep interrupting me all the time?" Johnny sighed. It was clear that the news he just received was not what he needed right now, not when they were about to tour in Canada, and he was as always trying to work out a solution. "Anyway like I said before you two interrupted me," he stopped and looked at Howie, "You have something to say too? Then spill it!"

The Latino looked surprised while defending himself. "No, No."He shook his head. "I have nothing to say."

"Good then maybe you can let me go on with my plans...”

"Yeah..Yeah," AJ urged him only to receive a hard stare from the rest of the boys. The manager looked like he was going to stop once again when he changed his mind.

"This is how we do it. You guys go back to the hotel, I call in and then if things are not any better we go down to the hospital. But for now we will have a low profile. Don’t say anything at the dinner table. Ok?" He glared at the three young men. "Any objections?"

"No." They all shook their heads. But deep inside they wanted nothing more than go to the hospital to see how Nick was doing and it bothered them that they had work to do first.

"Fine! Then let’s all go back inside and finish this dinner and remember. Low key." With that the manager walked into the ballroom again leaving the rest of the guys outside.

"Bullshit." AJ said once Johnny was out of view. "He can’t rule our life’s beside it will take too long before we get to see Nick and I wanna go down to that hospital now." Looking at Brian who seemed down he said, "Let’s skip this crap and get a cab instead." Placing his arm around Brian’s shoulder he urged, "Come on buddy, and let’s go."> Howie�s eyes widened. "You can’t do that!"

"Oh yeah?" AJ challenged. "And who’s gonna stop me? You? Johnny?" He laughed. "Well he can kiss my ass!" Before Howie had a chance to object his both friends they were out of the building. Brian, too numb to think straight, just followed AJ�s hunches and before he knew it he was whisked inside a waiting cab.

After AJ and Howie had a quick debate they decided that the Latino would go back inside and explain their hasty departure with that Brian was not feeling well and they were going back to the hotel. They all knew that neither Johnny nor the dinner guests would be pleased but they really didn’t have much choice. The reason why Howie was the one selected to go back and talk to the manager was mostly because he had a good hand with everyone in the management and he could calm them down, especially Johnny. "Where are you heading?" The cab driver asked once they had closed the door.

"To the hospital!" AJ was the one taking charge.

The hefty cabdriver chuckled. "Which one? There are several."

"Oh shit!" Turning to Brian he asked, "Rok where was it? Where did they go?"

Brian who had been sitting mostly quiet, thinking about all the worst thoughts in his mind mumbled, "I think it was Quebec General Hospital or something."

"Ok. You’re not from around here, are you?"

"Nope we’re American’s," AJ said proudly. "From Florida to be exact."

"That sounds pretty nice to me." The cab driver chuckled. "I’ll bet it’s better than the cold weather we’re having over here." "Can we please go now?" Brian groaned when he thought that the conversation between the cabdriver and AJ had been taking much too long. He was also afraid that Johnny would come bursting out from the entrance when he found out that they had ditched him.

"You got it!" With that the driver started the car and to Brian’s relief they headed for the hospital.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 19

Once Nick had arrived at the hospital he didn’t have to wait long before he was whisked into an examination room and a doctor named Greenheart preformed a quick examination on him. He got a good deal of drugs pumped into his system, hoping to fend off the virus that attacked his blood cells and also lower the fever that was still way too high. Kevin, who came back from a short trip from the restroom where he'd tried to sober up with a dash of cold water, opened the door only to find the doctor leaving the room in a hurry. Doctor Greenheart had been paged with an emergency call.
Nick was some sight where he sat on the bench, dressed in a hospital gown looking all forlorn. He had a dishevelled appearance and seemed genuinely tired. “Nick I thought the doctor told you to take it easy and rest.” Walking up to his friend he tried gently to push his friend to lie back on the bed again.

“No..Don't...It hurts my head too much to lie down.” Looking at his older brother with fever and panic shining in his eyes he added with a mumble, “Kev…do you know what they are going to do? to me?”

“No Nick I don't.” The older man shook his head but judging from his friends scared expression he guessed it wasn’t too nice.

“They are going to perform a lumbar test on me!” Nick was talking like he had been told the deed of doom. Shivering violently, and it wasn’t just because of the fever, he went on. “The doctor told me that they are going to put a spinal tap and take fluid and such.”

“They are?”

“Yeah.” Nick grimaced. “And it’s so gross!”

Kevin had no doubt that it would be a pretty nasty procedure but that was not something he would reveal to Nick who looked more and more frightened where he sat on the bed. Trying to get the young group member to relax he sat down next to him on the bed. “It’s probably done very quickly and I’ve heard that it isn’t that bad.” He was doing his best to sound reassuring but it didn’t help much since Nick shook his head violently despite his effort.

“No you don’t understand!” he said loudly. “They are going to use needles. Big ones!”

If the younger backstreet boy hadn’t been so sick the Kevin would have told Nick that he was a wuss but this time he felt much too sorry for the teen and instead laid his arm around his friends shaking shoulders. “Hey little man, relax. Getting you all worked up won’t make that headache of yours any better. ”

The sick boy looked up, his eyes bloodshot from illness. “That’s easy for you to say, You’re not the one that’s gonna have your whole innards getting sucked from you into a needle.” He mumbled weakly, a green tint appearing on his face as he uttered the words with disgust.

Kevin sighed. Nick was right. He was the lucky one that didn't have to endure such procedure and whatever he said didn't help his friend out much. Feeling the heat from the young boy's body he continued, "I think you should lay down and try to relax for a while." When Nick opened his mouth to obhect he added, “You’re still much too warm despite the medicine the doctor gave you and I’m sure that you’re really tired by now.” He awaited another objection and when none come said with a comforting tone. “I know this scares you but I’m going to be here beside you all the time and until it’s time to do the test I suggest that you try and get some rest.”

For a short moment the teen obeyed and laid down on the hospital bed, closing his eyes. Just when Kevin was sure that he was starting to dose off Nick’s eyes suddenly shot open. “Kevin?”

“Yes?” The older man looked down at the sickly boy.

“You know what a spinal tap is? A lumbar puncture?”

Kevin sighed. He thought Nick was done with that topic. “Yeah sort of.”

“Then what is it? “ The teen’s feverish eyes looked at him.

“Don’t you know? I mean you told me before and...”

“No.” Nick cut him short. “It�s not that…”

God the kid was starting to get on his nerves and for a moment he wished he hadn’t went into the hospital room and instead had waited outside. Nick was not making much sense right now and he was starting to get too tired to sit and listen to the teen’s gibberish. Trying his best to stay calm he asked, “Nick what do you mean?”

“Are they going to drug me? You know so I won’t feel a thing?” Nick’s voice rose a knot while he sat up leaning on his elbows.

“Probably.” Kevin nodded. “Yeah I think so and like I said it won’t take that long…I think.”

His friend looked like he didn’t believe him. “I don’t want to do that.” Looking at Kevin with begging eyes he continued, “Isn’t the doctors words enough that I have that meni...meningi...” His voice was whiny and it was starting to give the older man a headache. A hangover headache.

“You mean meningitis?” The Kentuckian corrected him. “And to answer your question; no it’s not enough. You need to do the test so they know what kind of germ or virus that they are dealing with and so they can give you the right kind of antibiotics.” He looked sternly at the kid who had laid down again. “They probably want to make sure that it’s not the worst part of meningitis that you got. The bacterial one. That one is bad.”

Even if Nick knew that Kevin was right. That they were doing it to make sure that he wasn’t on the verge of dying this was one procedure that he was scared of going through. Nick wasn’t a wuss. He just didn’t like needles that people stuck into him. The more he thought about it the more panic he felt and soon he found himself yelling at Kevin. “You don’t see…I don’t wanna do it!” Ignoring the headache that was more or less threatening to rip his skull apart he tried to get out of bed. “I wanna leave!” When Kevin pressed him back down he muttered, “You can’t hold me here. You’re not my mom or dad!”

Upon hearing these words the older man had to do his best not to snap. Nick could be such an ass at times, especially when he was in a pressed situation. Holding back his impatience he said, “You’re sick and they need to find out what is bothering you and that in turn means that you have to perform certain tests so they can help you with the right medication.” Sighing he decided he was tired of playing bedside manner with Nick and he started to regret not going to the dinner since it would have been so much easier to deal with. But then who would have discovered Nick and taken him to hospital? Maybe it was fate; maybe it was the meaning for him to get drunk on a day like this?

“I don’t care. I still won’t do it.” Nick was being stubborn despite the high fever he spiked and that his head felt like it would explode any second now. Tears pooled in his eyes and Kevin couldn’t decide if it was from being sick or something else.

“Don’t be stu...” Kevin stopped himself from telling Nick what a wuss he thought he was. The teen wasn’t stupid. He was just scared and why wouldn’t he be? Being sick and all in a foreign country far away from home and his family. Getting admitted to a hospital wasn’t fun either. There were times when Kevin had to remind himself that Nick was just a teen. He was sixteen and was doing a job of an adult, it was no wonder he was a bit childish at times. “Calm down little man,” he said, placing a comforting hand over Nicks hand, just to discover seconds later how warm it was. . “It will be just fine. It’s nothing to be scared about.” He smiled softly.“

Nick looked up with a nervous glance, “You sure?”

“About the test not hurting; yes.” A white lie wouldn’t hurt, would it?

Nick seemed to settle down for a moment. “Promise?”

"Promise." Kevin nodded. Feeling a bit guilty for not exactly telling the truth he said, “If you want I can stay with you while you do the lumbar puncture.” "You would do that to me?"

"Yes." He regretted his words once he’d said them. The prospect of having to endure such a procedure in close view made him feel disgusted and he wished there hadn’t been a satisfied smile on Nick’s lips.

“Thanks Kev,” Nick whispered hoarsely. “You rock, you know that?”

The older man blushed for a second or two, “It’s nothing. You would do the same for me if it was me in that bed, wouldn't you?.

“Maybe.” Nick smiled paley. "But I doubt that. It�s needles you know." He looked a bit applogetical.

Kevin chuckled. "Yes I know... And it's ok too." Noticing that the teen had closed his eyes he asked softly, "You're feeling bad?" He'd became at once worried when he saw how pale his friend was becoming again.

“Mmmm a little… my head hurts.” Swallowing hard he went on,“ And I I feel a bit sick too.” He had a hard time talking again and didn’t want to sound so whiny but suddenly he was feeling a lot crummier then he did five minutes ago.

“You want me to get someone?” Kevin rose to stand.

“Nah... It's ok. I think the worse is going away. I'll be fine if I don't move too much.” He held the older backstreet boys hand like he was afraid to let go of the grip and when Kevin was trying to lessen it so he could get some circulation back into his fingers his eyes shot open again and he said with panic in his voice. “You won’t go, will you?”

“No.” The Kentuckian shook his head in an attempt to calm his friend down. “I’m going to stay with you, don’t you worry.”

“Ok.” Satisfield over the answer Nick closed his eyes again. It was obvious that he was very tired and the sickness was starting to get the best out off him.

Stroking the teens sweaty strands out of his face Kevin whispered, “Just you relax buddy…I�m going to sit here beside you and I won’t leave.” To his satisfaction the wrinkles that had been evident on his friend’s forehead had ceased and finally for the first time that day Nick slept peacefully.

Behind the Lime Light - Chapter 20

The waiting had been long and Kevin had started to think that they had forgot all about them in the midnight rush when the door opened and a young nurse walked into the room, holding a chart in her hand “I’m sorry that you had to wait so long,” she said with an apologetical smile, “I’m here to take Mr. Carter down to surgery.” Her dark hair was put up in a loose ponytail and if she hadn’t carried her name tag which said she was a nurse Kevin would have thought that she was a college student. Tops. She looked young enough.
There was no immediate response from the sick bed even if Kevin suspected the teen to be awake. He felt it in place to say something and smiling back at her he said lightly, “For a moment I thought you had forgot all about us.”

“No,” she giggled nervously. “It’s just that it’s been very busy down here tonight. Lot’s of emergency calls and...and...” Kevin cut her short.

“That’s ok. I understand.”

The nurse seemed to relax a bit. “I’m here to take your brother to do a lumbar puncture.” Kevin opened his mouth to object when he heard a groan, “He’s not my brother.”

Startled that the body in the bed had moved they noticed a pair of dull, glassy eyes looking up at them. “He’s not my brother,” Nick repeated once again which had the nurse bushing a bit.

“Oh…I’m sorry…you’re a friend then?”

“Yeah…He’s Kevin. And he is the one that is going to stay with me.” Nick’s tone was forced and they could tell that he was in a great deal of pain but there were a determination in there also.

“Oh. So you are not relatives then?” The nurse looked a bit confused probably because only relatives were allowed to stay during such a procedure. The older man felt it was fit to give an explanation.

“We’re playing in this band together and we know each other pretty well and he wants me to stay with him since his parents are still back in the states. I hope that is ok with you?” He added one of his smiles that often made a girl’s heart melt and to their relief it worked this time too.

“Ye...Yes,” the young nurse stuttered. “I guess we can do that, but normally only relatives are allowed to accompany.”

“He is my relative,” Nick groaned from the bed.

“But I thought you said…” the nurse started when Nick cut her off, annoyance shining in his voice.

“He takes care of me like an older brother but he isn’t one. Ok” A deep sigh could be heard... “Are you just going to stand there or wheel me to do that surgery so we can get this over and done with?”

“Nick!”

Kevin was about to correct him when the teen mumbled, “My head is killing me and I don’t know if I can stand it anymore.” Upon hearing this, the nurse took some heavy actions and before they knew what hit them she had taken charge of the situation again.

“Just let me go and get the wheel chair and then I’ll wheel you over to surgery. Ok?”

“’k .” Nick wasn’t much talkative which didn’t account for Kevin.

“A wheel chair? You're going to move him in a wheelchair?” His tone raised a knot. “What’s wrong with moving him by bed?”

Nick groaned. The last thing he needed was Kevin to stall the situation any further.

“The elevators are kind of small,” the nurse explained nervously. “It’s better to take the wheelchair since I’m not too sure that a bed would fit that easily and the larger elevators are kind of busy at this hour.”

Kevin opened his mouth to object when Nick groaned loudly. “Kev, leave it. I’ll be fine. Just get me that damned wheel chair so we can get this over and done with.” He sat up slowly in bed and if it wasn’t for the fact that the older man noticed the pain etched on his face he would have gotten a reprimand for his behaviour. Instead the Kentuckian reached out a hand to steady his friend who looked like he was ready to pass out.

Nick’s bad mood in a situation like this was well known. The youngest in the group had a habit to be such a grouch whenever something had to do with his health. AJ used to tease him that he was allergic to everything that resembles doctors or hospitals and to be honest Kevin didn’t think it was that farfetched. Every time it was time for the flu shot Nick was like a thunder cloud so he wasn’t that surprised when the lumbar puncture would bring out his worst side either. When the doctor had told them that the meningitis could cause the patient to be a bit agitated Kevin had nodded thinking that they wouldn’t be able to tell the difference but now he wasn’t so sure anymore. Even if Nick was impatient for his nature he was never rude to anyone outside “the family” and today he had been a pain in the butt.

Making an attempt to calm Nick down, he mumbled comfortingly, “Hey Buddy I know that this scares you…” He was instantly cut off by a sneer comment.

“I’m not scared. I just want this over and done with so I can get some sleep. I’m tired and feel like crap!” Upon hearing the words the older man couldn’t help to feel sad for his friend. Nick was much too young to having to endure all this alone without his parents. He couldn’t help that yet another illness had managed to strike him but it wasn’t fair that he had to suffer without the comfort of his mom and dad. If Kevin was feeling as bad as his friend did right now he would want his mom by his side so he figured the case was the same for Nick too. The bad mood the teen showed could be because of this too and as soon as the sick boy had fallen asleep Kevin intended to call his parents and ask them to come and stay with him. Nick needed his family not just his “brothers.”

“Here you go.”

The nurse was back with the wheelchair and she gestured towards the seat for Nick to come and sit down. Stubborn as always the blonde didn’t want to show how sick he was feeling and how close he was to fainting which led for him standing up on shaky legs. When he swayed dangerously Kevin was there with a helping hand.

“Whoa there man, take it easy.”

But Nick didn’t want any help.

“I’m fine.” The teen shrugged his arm off even if it was evident that he was very dizzy and on the verge of passing out any second.

“Don’t be stupid Nick,” Kevin said tiredly. “Just let us help you.”

“No I can manage on my own.”

But Kevin wasn’t so sure about that and not before he thought it the teen tilted dangerously and they both reached out to steady him.

“I think you should lay down again so you don’t pass out. We can take the bed if you’re feeling that dizzy.” The nurse made an attempt guiding him back to bed again. But Nick was way too stubborn for his own good and he sneered despite feeling like shit.

“Lay off!”

Once again Kevin was there with his help. “No Nicky you’re not well. Listen to the nurse. You’re not thinking clear.”

“Should you say.” The teen snarled. “I’m not the one getting punch drunk this evening and then missing out of work.”

Kevin looked at him with a puzzled but also hurt expression. The nurse acted a bit uncomfortable but she made no comment. If Nick hadn’t been as sick as he was the fist would have hung high in the air but now he found no words to say and it didn’t help when he saw the tears gleaming in the corner of his friends eyes.

“I didn’t mean that Kev,” Nick said silently, biting his lip. He looked genuinely remorseful. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me today.”

“That’s Ok. You’re sick and the fever is doing a number on your brain.” Kevin forced a smile but it didn’t help since Nick was desperately fighting tears. Confused over the sudden change in mood he pat his shoulder comfortingly. “Come on little man; let’s get you into the wheel chair.”

The nurse had watched the drama unfold in silence and now she was springing into action again. “Yes. Let’s get this over and done with so you can get situated into a room and get good nights sleep.”

There was no answer coming from Nick as they both guided him into the wheelchair and the nurse placed his feet on the stand. Kevin sensed that he felt really bad from being so moody and especially for felling that comment about being drunk. Yet there was not much he could do about the situation and the fact that the teen was scared out of his wits didn’t help it all either. Now all he could do was be a support to Nick and stay with him like he’d promised before. His friend needed to feel safe and he was going to provide him that safety no matter what.

*************************************************************************** The ride up to the surgery went without complications and Nick was silent all the way. Kevin could see that he was desperately fighting his tears and he kept swallowing hard to block them away. Once they were up in surgery Kevin was handed a green shirt and green trousers and Nick was handed a green grown.

“We look like we’re ready to get drafted.” The older man joked but there was no smile back. Instead the teen mumbled with fright in his voice.

“Kev I don’t know if I can do this. What if it will be bad?”

“Buddy didn’t we go over this before?” Kevin asked with a sigh. “I know that it can be a bit uncomfortable but it’s nothing that you can’t handle; besides I’m going to sit next to you like I promised earlier on. It’ll be fine. You’ll see.”

Nick was being moved over to a bed and once he was settled in a woman’s voice broke the silence. “Hi Nickolas I’m Doctor Brown and I’m the one that will perform the lumbar puncture on you.”

Looking up the teen was met with a pair of warm brown eyes and a toothy white smile. He blinked several times having a hard time focusing since the fever was doing a number on his brain again. He could feel the fever rise in his veins and his head was aching so badly despite the drugs that had been pumped into his system earlier on. In a way he felt anxious for this procedure to be over and done with so he could finally relax and get some well needed sleep. Kevin was holding his hand and he could feel the bed moving as they went into the surgery room. He had to swallow constantly to keep the tears that were threatening to spill over a bay.

Kevin and the doctor talked but he had a hard time figuring out what they said since it was all one big murmur. His blood was rushing to his ears and for a moment he feared that he would pass out . Closing his eyes he steeled himself, hoping that it would do the trick as well as lessen the dizziness that was threatening to overwhelm him.

“Nickolas do you know how a lumbar puncture is done?” The middle aged woman asked while she was preparing him for the test.

“No,” He shook his head. “Only that it will hurt like a bitch!”

“Nick!” Once again Kevin was there with a reprimand but he didn’t care. The test scared him more than he wanted to let on. He wasn’t an easily scared person and squeamish was not something anyone could accuse him for yet he hated doctors and hospitals and needles. Those things as well as flying in planes were the worst thing he knew, that was if you didn’t count big fast roller coasters. Howie had his own idea why those things were not high on his list and shrink Dourough said it had to do with control. That he had a hard time dealing with anything that control of his life and where he couldn’t escape even if he wanted too. Nick thought it was nothing but bullshit, even if that was not something he said out loud since it would only hurt Howie and that was the last thing he wanted to happen.

“I don’t think it will hurt that much.” There was a slight chuckle. “But I won’t lie to you. It will feel a bit but nothing that you can’t handle.”

He let out a small moan which none of them took into consideration. “Nick as your friend told you wanted to be called, I want you to lay on your side, your knees drawn up a bit.” He did as she said and she uttered a pleased, “That’s it. Now I want you to lie like this during this procedure. Nurse Creed will hold your head during the procedure, that is so you don’t move and your friend here,” she nodded towards Kevin, “has volunteered to keep you company. However I must add that if any complications occur or I need to take his place I will send him out of the room. Is that clear?”

Nick nodded. His head felt like mush and the drugs he had been given were starting to cling off. That meant that he would start to feel sick soon and it was not something he was looking forward too.

“Will there be any side effects?” Kevin asked suddenly and he could hear the doctor telling him that there could be a headache, much like a migraine, as well as nausea. This had Nick groaning. Not that it would feel much different from what he felt right now, that he was sure of, but he had kind of hoped that once the test was done the severe headache that had accompanied him for what seemed like an eternity would disappear. And now the doctor told him that he would getting even more headaches. Then what was the use of doing this test if he was going to feel like hell from it too? In his fevered brain it made no sense. Nothing did make much sense today.

“I also want you to lay your head on that pillow.” She helped him to lie further up on the cot. “Now I’m going to feel on your spine with my fingers and prep the area by pressing on your spine several times. It won’t hurt but it might be a bit uncomfortable so I want you to tell me if you feel dizzy or nauseous.

“’k.” He was starting to dislike this test more and more for each second that passed on. Biting His lip he held Kevin’s hand. Hard. His older friend sat on his side all dressed in a surgery scrub and Nick could swear that he saw nervousness shining in his eyes. Yet the backstreet boy remained as calm as always.

Nick could feel the doctor finger his spine several times and even if it felt a bit ticklish he still tensed, afraid that it was going to hurt. Snapping on a pair of sterile gloves she continued, “Now when I have prepped your spine I’m going to give you some anaesthetic to numb your area.”

The words made him tense up. “Anaesthetic? As in needles?” He shivered suddenly, but from fear but also from the fever he felt was rising again. A drape was placed on his legs but it did not provide much warmth at all.

“Yes, this might sting a little but it shouldn’t be that uncomfortable.”

When the injection was over all Nick could say” Was that all?” It hadn’t been too bad and if that was the worse he had to endure he was certain he would survive.


“I’m afraid not. As soon as the area is numb I’m going to perform the test.”

“Oh!” This time Nick didn’t answer. He knew that the worst was yet to come and there was no option than to endure the pain. He couldn’t be a wuss and chicken out. That was not up to him to decide.

“Did you feel that?” She pressed against his spine and he shook his head in response.

“No.”

“Good.” With that Nick could hear her preparing the injection and then she said. “This might hurt a little as well as feel a bit uncomfortable but if you lay still the test won’t take too long.” “Ok.” He squeezed his eyes shut while waiting for the sting to come and when he felt the needle pricking his skin he squeezed Kevin’s hand too, cutting out the little blood circulation there was. An urge to scream crossed over him when the needle stretched into his spine, drawing fluid. It was the most nasty feeling he’d ever felt and it made him feel both dizzy and nauseous.

“God please,” Nick whimpered over and over again. “Please stop…it hurts.” Tears rolled down his face when the torture proceeded and no matter how many comforting and soothing words Kevin told him he was still frantic. As the needle stretched further into his body he wanted to cry out but stopped himself from screaming out loud. Instead he cried openly.

“Nick I need you to hold still,” the doctor said firmly and even if he wanted to he couldn’t. It hurt too much and now he was starting to feel even more nauseous too. This sucked big time.

“I fee…feel si..sick,” he mumbled only to gag seconds later.

“I know that it’s not comfortable but try to hold on. You also need to stay still. Then it won’t take that long.”

Swallowing hard this proved to be easier said then done and soon the nurse as well as another nurse that had come to assist where holding him down and to his despair Kevin was whisked away out from the room.

His only safety.

“Noooo!! Not Kevin.” Panic had set in and all he wanted was to get away from the torture and they kept holding him down.

“What we’re going to do?” He could hear the nurses talking over his head and the doctor told them that she couldn’t stop now. Just when he was certain that he would pass out or even worse die from a panic attack firm words told him to get it together.

“Nick listen…I know that this is hurting you but there is nothing I can do about it. All I ask is for you to lay still for a moment so I can continue with this test. I’m just going to go in there one more time.” Now she had changed her tone to a more soft approach. “Think you can handle that?”

The doctor looked him sternly in his eyes and even if he wanted he couldn’t answer since tears filled his throat, making it constrict in the process. She must have taken it as a yes because seconds later he could feel the needle penetrate him again and soon there was another draw back of fluid making him feel like his whole body was sucked through the small hole. Just when he was certain that this was it! That he couldn’t take it anymore the doctor said the magic words;

“Nick you did great. It’s over now. I’m only going to dress a gauge on the wound and then you going to get an injection so that you can sleep tonight. We’re also going to keep you for observation here in the wake up room up in ICU.”

Being too tired and exhausted to talk all he could do was nod. His back hurt so badly and the headache wasn’t any better but at least the nausea had left him without any vomiting spells this time. At least he could feel gratitude for that. Even though he managed by some miracle way to survive he still couldn’t calm down. Not without his friends by his side.