Chapter 1

It had been six months since anyone had seen or heard from Amber well, all except Caitlin, who talked to Amber any free time they could get. Caitlin could tell there was a change in Amber but it was for the better. I mean, she still was the same lovable person but just more...grown up. They talked about there lives and stuff along those lines but never once had Amber mention the guys or A.j. Caitlin didn't know if she was doing this to forget her past or not but she decided not to push it. Amber seemed more full of life and happy whenever Caitlin spoke to her, she was more relaxed and calm. She had just about finished her autobiography and was quite happy with herself and her achievements.

"So when are you coming home?"

"Caitlin, we go through this conversation every phone call." Laughed Amber. "And it's starting to get old."

"Amber you have to come back! The guys are on tour and I'm here all by my lonesome."

"Why didn't you go with Nicky then?"

"I can't be around him for that long, I'd go crazy! I mean, don't get me wrong I love the man and all but sometimes a girl needs to be Carter-free." Caitlin giggled.

"I can't believe it! You must be the only girl, well besides me." Amber laughed. "Who can't stand to be around Nicky boy all the time."

"Yeah, but ya gotta love him." Caitlin smiled and Amber agreed. "He's one of a kind."

"Thank god!" Amber joked and they laughed.

"He wanted me to come but I had to stay here."

"Why?"

"What I didn't tell you?" Caitlin asked.

"Tell me what?"

"I'm moving in with Nick."

"Really? When did this happen?"

"A few weeks before he left on tour. I told him since you where gone I would go back home be he insisted that I move in with him."

"Oh, so now your stuck trying to organize everything." Amber smiled. "Caitlin and Nicky sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g." Amber teased and laughed.

"You got that right!" Caitlin laughed. "That's part of the reason why I need you here, to help me get settled in this big old house of his."

"It's your house to Cate." Amber smiled.

"I'm gonna have to get used to calling this place home huh?"

"Sure are missy." Amber laughed. "God, I miss Florida."

"I have a simple solution that will fix everything."

"What?"

"Come back! Amber you've been gone six mounts! So much has happened and it's not every funny. You've been gone long enough to find yourself so bring your ass back here." Caitlin said all in one breath.

"Aww ya miss me that much?" Amber smiled.

"Amber. I need you here to keep me sane ok?" Caitlin laughed. "They've been gone on tour for....two and a half weeks and I'm already starting to loss it." Caitlin joked. "It's so quite, I need company." Caitlin whined, Amber laughed.

"Would it brighten your day if I was to tell you to pick me up at the airport tomorrow?" Amber smiled.

"You’re coming back?"

"Well not anymore, you sound like you changed your mind." Amber joked.

"No I haven’t, I'm just surprised that's all." Caitlin smiled. "Great, now I have somebody to go crazy with." Caitlin and Amber laughed. A few more minutes later they got off the phone and Amber began packing for her trip. After six mounts Amber was ready to come back home. She had learned a lot form herself and was happy to return home tomorrow. Her mind drifted to A.j for a minute.

"I wonder if he still loves me?" She thought to herself, already feeling heartbroken at the thought that he didn't. "What are you saying Amber? When you left yeah he said he loved you but he still was with Krista and the time...I wonder it their still together? I wonder if he chose her?" Amber just shook off these feelings and took a shower and went to bed, tomorrow she would be home, talking to Caitlin and having starting a new life, one that was going to take place with or without A.j.....But she really hoped it would be with.

~*~*~*~*~*

"Yo Bone! Pass me a soda!" Nick yelled from his spot on the floor of the entertainment room on the buss.

"What am I your maid? Get it your damn self. Besides, I'm not even going to the frig." A.j smirked and walked right pass the frig and laughed as Nick glared at him.

"That was cold man!"

"Then put on a sweater." A.j joked and placed him arms around a familiar young lady. He kissed her neck and she smiled. "I missed you."

"Miss me?" She smiled. "Alex I haven’t gone anywhere today, I've been with you." Krista smiled and leaned back into his embrace.

"Yeah you did." A.j began to fool with Krista's tank top.

"When?" She giggled at the contact his lips were making with her neck.

"Just a minute ago, when you got up to come in here." A.j smiled. Krista turned around and they kissed.

"Hey! There will be none of that while I'm around!" Nick said, walking to the frig and grabbing a Sprite.

"No one told you to come on to my bus in the first place Nicky." A.j continued his assault on Krista's neck.

"What? My T.V is broken." Nick whined. "Besides I knew you wouldn't mind."

"Under any other circumstance I don't but I have a need right now Nicky, and your killing it." Krista giggled.

"Now Alex play nice with Nick." Krista smiled and looked into his eyes.

"But I don't wanna play with Nick, I'd rather play with you." He flashed her a seductive smiled. Nick took that as his cue to go back to playing his Nintendo.

"Alex." Krista blushed and he laughed. "Is that all you think about?" A.j pretended to think for a minute.

"When it comes to you...yeah." He passionately kissed her. "I love you Amber." He whispered and Krista pulled back and gave him a funny look.

"What did you just say?"

"Krista? I love you Krista." A.j spat out quite. Why did he call Krista Amber? This was not the first time he had made that mistake but lucky for him Krista never really caught on to it but now.

"No you didn't you said Amber." Krista never once raised her voice. "You called her name in you sleep last night and come to think about it you called her name almost every night. Why?" Oh shit, she had caught him there. He never realized he was calling out for Amber in his sleep let alone Krista hearing him. Ever since the day Amber left he had dreams about her, about what they could be together, how happy they would be...but why? He didn't have any problems with Krista, she loved him and he loved her with all his heart. But then why was he calling out for Amber? Yeah he told her he loved her but in the end he just thought of it as the spur of the moment type of thing. Oh well. He hadn't seen of heard form Amber in six mounts. Maybe she found out what her heart wanted and it was obvious it wasn't him or so he thought. It was far past time for him to move on with his life and be with Krista and stop all these dreams that did nothing but torment him. But deep down he knew he still needed her, but he would have to learn how to let that go.

"I'm sorry Kris, I guess I just miss her that's all."

"I don't get it why don't you just call her?"

"It's not that simple babe." A.j ran his fingers thru his hair/

"Why?"

"Because I don’t know exactly where she is, she kinda just up and left."

"Oh. When is she coming back?"

"I don't know." But A.j hoped for some reason it would be soon. No matter what he did he knew he would all ways love her, need her, and want her. But there was no telling how she felt about him, if she even felt anything at all. A.j laid in his bunk staring at the darkness as sleep came to him. "Goodnight baby girl, come back to me." A.j fell asleep as those words softly played off his lips and he dreamt the same dream every night, seeing her again. But that was imposable, she was never going to come back to him...or so he thought.

Chapter 2

Amber sat in the airport searching the crowd for a familiar face. She was tired from her long flight and wanted to get back home. She had loved her time in Hawaii, I mean who wouldn’t? It’s beautiful over there. But nevertheless she wanted to come home and see Caitlin and the guys. Amber looked again only to be met with a smiling Caitlin.

“Amby!” Caitlin squealed and hugged Amber tightly.

“Caitlin?”

“Yeah.” She smiled, still hugging Amber.

“I know you’re happy to see me and all and I’m happy to see you as well but your cutting off my air supply.” Amber laughed and Caitlin let her go and smiled.

“Sorry, I just missed you girl!”

“I missed ya to.” Amber smiled. They picked up her bags and made it to the car.

“So Amby, anything exciting happen in Hawaii your not telling me?” Caitlin asked and Amber smiled.

“Nope.” She simply answered, still smiling. “Nothing at all.”

“Oh come on! You don’t expect me to fall for that do you?”

“Well…yeah.” Amber and Caitlin laughed.

“Ok, spill it.” She smiled.

“I did meet somebody.” Amber confessed. “He was extremely sweet and it didn’t hurt that he wasn’t that bad looking.” Amber smiled.

“Anything happened between you to?”

“Naw, I told him I wasn’t ready for a relationship. I mean, I still do have feelings for…you know.”

“A.j?” Caitlin asked.

“Yeah. By the way how is he?”

“She doesn’t know?” Caitlin asked herself. “How could she not know the A.j and Krista were still together.”

“Cate? Cate, are you ok?” Amber asked, snapping Caitlin from her daze.

“Huh? Oh yeah, just thinking about Nicky.” Caitlin scolded herself on the inside for lying but she couldn’t help it. She didn’t want to see Amber get hurt again and leave, this time maybe even for good and she didn’t want that. “Speaking of Nick, he called last night.” She hoped to change the subject.

“Really? What did he say? Or do I even wanna know?” Amber joked and Caitlin giggled.

“Just the same as every other conversation we have.” She smiled.

“So basically you spend forever on the phone being all loving?” Amber smiled and Caitlin nodded. “I’m happy for you Caitlin, I really am but just promise one thing?”

“What’s that?”

“I get to be the maid of honor if you and Nicky decide to tie the not.” Caitlin laughed.

“Sure Amber, ok. But I have to warn you that Nicky and I don’t see wedding bells in our future yet.”

“Yet Caitlin. “Yet” is the key word in that sentence.” Amber giggled as they pulled into her driveway and Caitlin helped her unpack her stuff. Amber unlocked her front door and set down her bags.

“Home.” Amber sighed. “It’s good to be back.” She smiled.

“Well it’s good to have you back.” Caitlin smiled. “What do you say I help you unpack?”

“Naw that’s ok, I’ll do it later.” Amber sat on the couch.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I just want to get some sleep. We all know those plane are the most comfortable place for a nap.” Amber said with sarcasm.

“Ok. I guess I’ll see ya later then?”

“You can go as soon as you answer my question.”

“What question?” Caitlin started to worry.

“About A.j and the rest of the guys. How are they?” Amber really wanted to know about A.j but was worried about what the answer would be.

“The guys are fine. I don’t know if you want to know this but Brian is kinda dating someone.” Caitlin waited for Amber’s response but got nothing so she continued. “Her name is…

“Alicia.” Amber finished for her.

“Uh…yeah. How did you know?” Amber smiled.

Chapter 3

“I was out shopping and heard about it on the radio. I’m happy for them, he deserves so much more then I could ever give him.”

“Oh, so your ok with it?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well for one thing Alicia is nothing but a gold digging whore, all she wants is his money.” Amber sat up and looked at Caitlin in disbelief.

“What? How do you know?”

“Brian called for Nick one day but he wasn’t home so he and I had a little conversation. He asked me if I would hang out with Alicia for a while, just till she got used to being around everyone, I said yes and took her to the mall. Some how we got separated and when I found her she was on the phone talking to someone. She told them she was planning on marring Brian and then in a divorce get all the money she could get her slimy little hands on.”

“No way.”

“Yes way! Amber that bitch is bad news, she doesn’t love him, she’s just using him for her own personal gain.”

“I’ve only been back for two hours and all ready drama has unfolded right before my eyes.” Amber giggled. “What do you propose we do?”

“I don’t know what we can do! She has him wrapped around her twisted little finger.”
Amber laid back on the couch again and sang.

“No more drama! No more drama!”

“Thank you Mary J, but for real.” Caitlin couldn’t help but laugh, Amber smiled.

“I don’t know what to do. It wouldn’t be a smart thing for us to just attack him with this info, hell I just got back.”

“Yeah I know. Wait, I have an ideal!”

“What is it?”

“I don’t know if you’ll be up to it though, I mean Brian won’t be the only one we’d be surprising.”

“How so?”

“Well…I was thinking that maybe we could, I mean if you wanna and if you don’t I understand.”

“Caitlin, you’re not making any sense.” Amber giggled. “Try again, but this time go slow.”

“I was thinking that maybe we could go join them.”

“Join who?”

“Backstreet boys Amber! Who else?”

“Oh no! I don’t think I can do that.”

“Why not! You get to see the guys again and I know for a fact that they all miss you a lot, hell Kevin tried to pay me to get me to tell him where you ran off to but I told him I didn’t know. They’ve all been worried sick about you.”

“You should have told them I was fine.” Amber smiled.

“I did! But they still wanted to hear it from you in order to believe it. They really love you Amby.”

“Hey they love you to.”

“Yeah but I was here with them for the last six months and you weren’t. We don’t have to stay the whole tour just a week or so.”

“Yeah ok, I’ll go.”

“Great. I’ll go call Nick and tell him.”

“Tell him not to mention it to anyone, I want it to be a surprise.” Amber smiled and Caitlin nodded.

“Will do, see ya later Amby.” Caitlin opened the door.

“Bye, call me later k?”

“Ok, bye.” And with that Caitlin left to make the reservations. “God I hope this plan works.” Caitlin said to herself aloud as she punched in a familiar number.

“Hello?” A tired voice answered after the forth ring.

“Brian?”

“Oh hey Cate, what’s up?”

“Nothing much, it’s all set up. Amber and I are coming out to spend a week with you guys.”

“Great.” Brian smiled on the other end.

“Bri, refresh my memory and tell me why are we tricking Amber into coming out there when there is no Alicia?”

“I want Amber to be happy. A.j is still with Krista and it doesn’t make any sense for her to still love him if he doesn’t love her.”

“But how did you make up this girl and get away with it? Especially with the public.”

“The paparazzi doesn’t care if it’s real or if its fake, whatever puts money in their pockets.”

“I hope you know what your doing.” Caitlin warned.

“Don’t worry, I do.”

Chapter 4


“How do you know A.j doesn’t love Amber?”

“Well I don’t know for sure, but what I do know is if he really was in love with Amber then he wouldn’t be with Krista right now.”

“You got me there. I’m just scared it will hurt her and she’ll run again and never look back.”

“Amber won’t run again, I won’t let her! I need her more then she’ll ever know, I love her Caitlin, I really do. And maybe if I can get her out here can I show her that.”

“Well we’re coming so don’t worry, that part of the plan is done but how are you gonna keep A.j away?”

“Don’t worry about that. Krista will be attached to him wherever he goes. He’s not gonna play with Amber’s heart. He has Kris so he should just be happy and leave what happened with them in the past where it belongs.”

“I understand where you going with this Brian but what if he does?”

“Caitlin.” Brain whined. “Can you at least pretend to be on my side.” Caitlin giggled.

“Ok.”

“Thank you.” Brian laughed.

“So what are we gonna do when she asks about Alicia?”

“I’ll just say she had to leave or something, it shouldn’t be that hard cause Alicia doesn’t even exist.”

“I feel bad Bri, we’re lying to Amber here.” Caitlin pulled into Nick’s Driveway and shut off the car.

“I know, do you think I’m jumping up for joy? I know this may be selfish but people throw object and reason out the window when they’re in love.”

“You must really love her.”

“More then you’ll ever know.” Brian smiled. “So I guess I’ll talk to you when you guys come out here, when are you guys coming?”

“Maybe next week or so.”

“Great, see ya soon bye Cate.”

“Bye Bri.” Caitlin looked at the phone in her hands and sighed as she placed it back on its cradle. Caitlin sat her keys down and made her way to her bedroom, she still refuses to sleep in the same room with Nick, not that she didn’t love him because she just didn’t want to.

“I have a bad feeling about this.” She said to herself.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Amber was lying in her bed trying to sleep but it just wouldn’t come to her. In the back of her mind was A.j and going out to see him and the guys. On her little vacation Amber had realize she was in love with him and that was it. Her heart told her that and she knew it wouldn’t stir her wrong. But what if A.j’s told him something different? No, she couldn’t think like this, it was no good but why build up hope only to be let down?

“Get a grip Amber!” Amber yelled out loud. “If he doesn’t feel that way anymore, just move on.” She sighed as she turned over on her back staring up at the ceiling. “Who am I kidding? He’s probably with Krista right now.” Amber felt a small tear escaped her eye and brushed it away. “Why do I need you so much Alex?” Finally after an hour Amber found a dreamless sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Do you love me Alex? I mean really love me? I have to know.” A.j walked up and wrapped her in his arms.

“I love you baby girl, with everything I am.” A.j pulled back to look into her tear-filled eyes and smiled. “I love you.” He whispered and leaned in and kissed her.

“God, it seems like I’ve waited forever for this moment.” A.j cupped her face and she closed her eyes.

“You don’t have to wait anymore baby.”

“I never want this to end Alex, I need you.”

“It will never end babe, you have me and I have you, that’s all we’ll ever need.” He kissed her.

“You won’t leave me will you.” She opened her eyes and tears ran down her cheek and A.j brushed them away and smiled.

“I’ll never leave you, I love you so much Amber.”

A.j bolted up out his bunk; he had just had one of his dreams about Amber. These were becoming more and more frequent. Why was he having the same dream every night? Was it a sign? God he hoped not but then again he wanted it to become reality. A.j got up and walked thru the dark tour bus and into the bathroom. Once he locked the door he looked into the mirror.

“What’s happening to you McLean?” He asked himself softly so Krista wouldn’t wake up and hear him. “You should be dreaming about your girl not Amber.” A.j placed his pointer and middle finger to his lips. Even though he knew it was a dream it always felt so real to him. How come he could always feel her kiss’ even in a dream? Amber mesmerized him in many ways. “Why do I need you so much Amby?” A.j asked himself. After that A.j made his way back to his bunk but first he checked Krista’s bunk across from his and she was fast asleep, he smiled, got in his and drifted off to sleep. But little did he know Krista was far from sleep. She had heard A.j in his sleep once again call out Amber’s name and whisper a silent I love you and it broke her heart. Krista reached over and picked up her diary and a pen. When she was sure A.j was sleeping she made her way to the kitchen and switched on the light. She looked out the window at the passing trees as the rain poured down and sighed.

“Match’s my mood completely.” Krista whispered and sat down at the table and opened her diary.

Dear Diary,
I don’t know how much longer I can put up with this. Alex called out for her again tonight but this time he told her he loved her. Dairy does he really or am I acting a fool? I don’t know, but I have a feeling I’ll find out soon, I hope it doesn’t involved getting my heart broken. I love him so much dairy and I know he loves me but sometimes I wonder when he sees me does he see me? Or does he see Amber? I shouldn’t worry to much, Amber isn’t around and hasn’t been for a while as Alex puts it but then why do I still feel uneasy? Maybe I’m just being paranoid; yeah that’s it. Goodnight diary.


Krista made her way back to her bunk and tried to sleep, which didn’t come easy. Something was going to happen and it was going to happen soon.

Chapter 5

A week passed by rather quickly and Amber and Caitlin were getting situated in their hotel room.

"God, don't you just love New Orleans?" Caitlin asked.

"Yeah, its ok." Amber smiled and lied on her bed.

"Amber?"

"Hmm?"

"How do you feel about Brian?"

"What do you mean? I already told you I don't care if he has a girlfriend, it's for the best."

"Yeah but if he didn't, then how would you feel?"

"I don't know, why?"

"No reason."

"There has to be a reason you asked Caitlin."

"It's just, I think you and Brian make a really cute pair, that's all."

"Well not anymore. He has someone."

"But if he didn't would you give him another try?"

"Caitlin, what's up with all these questions?" Amber laughed.

"Just curious, that's all." Caitlin smiled. "Hey, do you wanna go out to eat or should I order in?"

"Out, we might meet some hotties tonight." Amber laughed. "This is the city of love ya know."

"Amber, Paris is the city of love." Caitlin giggled. "I think all these plane rides you've been taking have finally fried your brain." Amber giggled.

"Probably. So where do you wanna go?"

"My friend Heather suggested this place called La Renace (AN: My own little made up place.) Or something, she said the food was awesome but you pay a pretty penny for it."

"Ah so it's expensive."

"Yep." Caitlin walked into the bathroom to freshen up.

"I don't care, as long as I get food in this stomach of mine."

"Ditto." Caitlin and Amber left 15 minutes after that to go eat at La Renace.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A.j watched Krista as she walked into their hotel room; she had been gone for most of the day. Come to think of it she was hardly ever around A.j for more then needed.
A.j got up and hugged her from behind and kissed her neck.

"Hey baby." He whispered in her ear and Krista could feel herself melt, she knew she couldn't stay mad at him for long.

"Hi."

"How’s everything? Is everything ok?" Krista nodded. "Good. I have a surprise for you babe." He smiled as she turned around to face him.

"What is it?"

"Remember that new place that opened up here?" Krista thought for a minute then it came to her.

"La Renace?"

"Yep, we're going tonight." He kissed her hand.

"But I thought you had a show tonight."

"Tomorrow baby." He smiled and she returned it. Krista leaned in and kissed him passionately and he returned it. He made sure not to say you know who's name, he was gonna make it up to Krista. He knew how much he was hurting her by calling her Amber and tonight he was going to make up for it.

"I love you." Krista whispered and he smiled.

"I love you to."

“So what time are our reservations?” Krista asked as she sat on the bed.

“Eight.” A.j answered and Krista looked at the clock, which read 7:27.

“Damn McLean. Don’t even give a girl time to get ready.” Krista laughed and headed into the bathroom to take a quick shower.

“Want any company in there?” A.j yelled from the bedroom.

“No McLean! The last time I had company in here it took us forever to get out.” Krista giggled.

“And your point is?” A grin forming on A.j’s face as Krista walked back into the bedroom to get a towel.

“My point is you don’t know how to behave your self mister.”

“I can behave myself.” A.j placed his hand over his heart and gave her the best puppy eyes he could.

“Sure you can.” Krista giggled. “Hey! Where are all the towels?”

“What? We don’t have towels?” A.j asked grinning.

“No we don’t. Now how am I going to dry myself off?” A.j laughed. “What’s so funny?”

“I have a solution for your problem love.” He smiled. “I could lick the water off you.”

“I’m sure you would like that very much, wouldn’t you?” Krista smiled as A.j began to play with her top.

“Bonedaddy wants some love mama.” He whispered softly in her ear. Krista giggled.

“Sorry but Bonedaddy is just going to have to wait.”

“Why?” A.j whined.

“Because if we start something now we won’t make it to the restaurant on time.”

“So?”

“So?” Krista mocked him. A.j stopped and looked at her. Krista just kissed his nose and went next door to borrow a towel from Nick. As she shut the door A.j’s cell phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Alex, sweetheart. How are you?” A cheery voiced asked.

“Hi mom, I’m doing ok and you?”

“I’m great. Guess what I found out today.”

“What?”

“Come on Alex guess.”

“I don’t know ma.” A.j laid back on the bed and closed his eyes and pictured Krista and smiled.

“Fine.” Denise laughed. “You never where one with patience.”

“I know.” A.j laughed with her.

“Amber is back.” At this A.j shot straight up. “Alex? Alex are you still there?”

“Y-Yeah mom I’m still here. What did you say?”

“Good. I said Amber is back.” The day at the airport came running back to him and memories of her that he was trying to erase began to resurface.

“Amber.” He whispered. “Well how is she? Did she ask about me? Is she okay? How was her trip?”

“Whoa Alex, calm down.” Denise laughed. “Anyway why don’t you call her and ask her yourself?”

“Yeah, maybe I will.” A.j ran his hand thru his hair, for a change he skipped to wild colors and went with his natural one.

“I know you have missed her a great deal sweetheart and it will do you some good to talk to her.”

“Yeah.” A.j didn’t know what to think. Sure he had missed her, he dreamed about her every night. Sometimes just lying in his bunk thinking about her and why he felt the way he did about her or is it how he feels about her? A.j hung up the phone with his mom as Krista walked back into the room.

“Are you ok J? You look like you’ve just be hit by a truck?”

“Huh? Oh Kris, I’m fine just a little tired that’s all.” A.j just sat there staring out into space.

“Are you sure?” Krista sat next to him and felt his forehead. “Maybe you’re coming down with something.”

“I’m fine, really. I think I just need some rest.” A.j closed his eyes and imminently an image of Amber popped into his mind. “God why is this happening to me now?” He thought to himself.

“So we’re not going out tonight are we?” Krista asked.

“I’ll make it up to you Kris, I promise.”

“No, its ok. I’d rather stay here and take care of you.” She smiled as she turned out the lights and got in the bed with to him.

~*~THE NEXT DAY*~*

“What time are you going to meet the guys again Cate?” Amber called from the bathroom.

“Uhh…around 7:30, their concert starts at 6 and ends at 7.” Caitlin answered.

“Are we still going to the concert?”

“Yep.”

“Do you think they’re going to be mad at me for just up and running do you?” Amber asked as she walked back into the bedroom to pick out an outfit.

“Amber, just tell them you needed a vacation. They all know you work hard on your writing and will understand why you had disappear for awhile.”

“You right.”

“I know.” Caitlin smiled.

“Sometimes I don’t know if Nick has the bigger ego or you.” Amber joked.

“Definitely Nicky, the boy goes insane if he loses a video game for crying out loud.” Caitlin laughed.

“Well that’s Nick for ya.” Amber laughed.

“Yeah, and I wouldn’t have him any other way.” Caitlin smiled and picked up her cell phone and dialed seven familiar numbers. After about two rings the person picked up.

“Hello?” Asked a tired voice.

“Aww. Don’t tell me your still asleep baby, I came all this way for nothing.” Caitlin smiled while she played with the phone cord.

“Caitlin? Baby is that you?” The voice sounded more awake now.

“Good guess.” She beamed.

“Where are you?”

“New Orleans.”

“Right now?” He asked.

“Yep.”

“Which hotel?”

“The Marriott.”

“Really?”

“Yes really.” She laughed and looked at Amber who was mouthing who is it. “Nick.” Caitlin whispered. When Amber realized it was Nick she smiled.

“Hi Nickelodeon!” Amber yelled and heard Nick laughing on the other end of the phone.

“So Amby’s back huh?” Nick asked as Caitlin put her ear back to the phone.

“Yeah, but remember you can’t tell anyone.”

“Why?” Nick was confused.

“We want to surprise the rest of the guys.”

“Oh yeah.” A sound of remembrance washed over him.

“Oh yeah.” Caitlin mocked him and Nick laughed. “I can’t wait to see you.”

“I can’t wait to see you to babe, I’ve missed you.” Caitlin smiled.

“I’ve missed you to. See you later okay?”

“K.”

“I love you.”

“I love you to.” Nick replied.

“Love you more.”

“No, I love you more.” Nick heard Caitlin giggle on the other end and smiled.

“How about you love each other equally?” Amber yelled and caused Caitlin and Nick to laugh.

“I can live with that.” Caitlin smiled.

“So can I babe, so can I.” After that Caitlin hung up the phone and looked over at Amber who had the biggest grin on her face. “What?” Caitlin asked but Amber just shook her head. “Amby tell me.” Caitlin whined.

“Once again your acting like Nick with all that damn whining.” Amber joked and Caitlin laughed.

“Tell me Amby.”

“Tell you what?”

“Don’t try to play innocent with me young lady.” Caitlin laughed.

“Fine. If you must know.”

“Yes I do.” Caitlin smiled.

“I was just thinking of how luck you where to have someone who obviously cares a great deal about you.”

“Yeah.” Caitlin replied in a dreamy voice.

“Must be a nice feeling to have.”

“Aww Amby. Don’t feel blue, I have a feeling your going to meet someone here that’s going to turn your whole world upside down.” Amber smiled.

“You think so?”

“No. I know so.” Caitlin smiled and hugged her friend.

“And how do you know? What makes you so sure?” Amber asked.

“Da Card don’t lie child.” Caitlin imitated her best Miss. Chloe voice. Her and Amber busted out laughing.

“What would I do without you Caitlin?” Amber laughed.

“I don’t know, I don’t know what I would do without you here to act a fool with.” Caitlin giggled. “We’re two of a kind.”

“Partners in crime.” Amber laughed and so did Caitlin.

"You do realize you need to calm down right?" Caitlin laughed at Amber, who had been jumpy, the whole cab ride to the arena.

"What? I'm as calm as they come." Amber tried to cover up.

"Right." Caitlin smiled. "That's why you’re shaking."

"Huh?" Caitlin pointed down at Amber's hands. "Ok, ok so maybe I'm just a little nervous. There’s nothing wrong with that, it's a perfectly normal human emotion."

"True, but why? Why are you so nervous about seeing the guys again? It's just them."

"But you see that's it." They got out the cab and Caitlin gave the man 20 bucks and a smile. "Caitlin!"

"Thank you." The cab driver smiled and Caitlin returned it as he drove off.

"Caitlin you gave him twenty dollars for a four dollar ride?"

"Well the poor man had to listen to you babble about why you shouldn’t have come here for the whole ride so I thought I'd give him something to ease the pain." She joked. "Now come on and stop your bellyaching! I want to see Nick before the show." Caitlin beamed, grabbed Amber's hand and headed backstage.

"Ah, Caitlin."

"Hey Tom, how’s life as a security guard treating you tonight?" She asked as she and Amber showed him their passes.

"Well let's see, six girls tried to bribe me, two tried the whole 'I'm a family member and I really need to talk to Howie' routine and to top off my night well over two thousand fans chased us into the arena." Caitlin giggled. "So yea, my night has been just dandy." Tom smiled.

"Aww Tommy."

"You think that's bad? You should have been here last night! But that's a whole other story." Caitlin laughed.

"I'm sure it is. See ya Tom!" Caitlin yelled over her shoulder and drugged Amber along. We they got backstage they saw people running around like chickens without heads.

"Where’s Nick? Jack have you seen Nick?" One called.

"Dressing room eight Tailie!" Booker yelled.

"15 minutes to show time!" Someone yelled over all the madness. Caitlin and Amber looked at each other and laughed.

"So glad I don't work here."

"I second that motion." Caitlin smiled as she felt a pair of familiar arms go around her. "Nick." She whispered and turned in his arms.

"I missed you." Nick smiled and placed a tender kiss on Caitlin's lips. "What took you guys so long?"

"Outfit crises." Amber smiled. "Hey sexy."

"Hey yourself missy! Now where's my hug huh?" Amber smiled and gave Nick a big bear hug. "Leave me for half a year and don’t call!" She giggled.

"Well?"

"Well?" Nick mocked her and she playfully slapped his arm.

"Aren’t you going to tell me you missed me to?"

"Amby, you know we've missed you! All the guys have been going crazy over you, why didn't you ever call? Even if it was just to let us know you where alright?"

"Oh Nicky it's over and done with and I'm fine. Besides I'm here now and that's all the counts." She beamed.

"True. It's good to see you again Amby." Nick gave her one last smile and focused his attention back to Caitlin. "Now where were we?" Nick smiled and leaned in for another kiss.

"Oh god." Amber covered her eyes in mock horror. "Here they go again, I see that some things never change."

"Nick! There you are, I've been looking all over for you!" Nick pulled away from Caitlin and looked into the face of a very irritated Hailie.

"Hailie, I can explain."

"You know Nick, any other day I'd love to sit here and listen to your excuses, but news flash, this ain't one of them."

"Hailie." He pleaded and Amber snickered while Caitlin stood there confused. She was about to ask who this Tailie was but Amber shook her head not to, this was a funny scene to watch.
"Nick you have T minus 3 seconds to get your ass over to Jack so he can wire you up for the show ok? Unless you plan on going out into the audience and singing in every girls ear." She raised an eyebrow at Nick and he sighed.

"Yes ma'am." Nick gave Caitlin and Amber a small hug and left to over where Jack was standing, amassment written all over his face.

"That's the third time this week Carter." He laughed.

"Yeah I know." He joined in on the laughing. "And you think that after that nice little speech she gave A.j about the pyro I'd learn not to mess with her."

"Well she’s a pretty tough cookie!"

"You got that right." Nick agreed as Jack hooked up the last three wires.

"A tough cookie with a nice ass." They laughed and high fived.

"And they swear I can't hear them." Hailie shook her head and smiled at a laughing Amber. Nick and Jack froze on the spot and looked over at them. She pointed to her headset and Jack, getting the drift, looked down at his, which was on.

"Shit!"

"That's the beauty of microphones gentlemen, now lets get moving!" She clapped her hands.

"Come on lets go!" Booker yelled with laugher in his voice.

"You’re going to watch right?" Nick asked.

"Well Nickelodeon." Amber smiled and placed an arm around his shoulders. "We didn't fly 1,000 miles for nothing." He laughed and took his place with the rest of the guys.

Chapter 7 "Come Cait, lets go find our seats." This time it was Amber dragging Caitlin. "What's wrong?" Amber asked as they made it to their seats, waiting for the show to start. "Whose Hailie?" "Backstage manager. The girl is around our age, super sweet and nice...well in till you get on her bad side." Amber laughed. "Oh." "Don't worry, she’s doesn't have a thing for your man." Amber smiled, reading Caitlin's mind. "Last I heard she had a thing for Brian." Caitlin smiled. "That's a relief." Amber giggled as the lights when dark and the journey into the backstreet world began. Half way thru the show Amber and Caitlin where having a great time. They were singing and dancing to all the songs, some of the fans looked at them and laughed. "That's Nick's girlfriend." One pointed. "What's her name?" "Caitlin." She smiled as she overheard most of what they where saying but the music was too loud to hear anything else. "What are you smiling for?" Amber laughed. "Nothing." She smiled even wider. "Lair! You’re cheesing so damn bad." Caitlin let out a small laugh. "Somebody scream!" A.j yelled in his mic and Amber and Caitlin along side thousands of other girls screamed at the top of their lungs. "I doubt we'll be able to hear tomorrow, let alone talk." Amber joked but was over powered by the pyro that was going off on stage. The show was completely awesome, and it got even better as one by one each of the guys came out and did their solo numbers. A.j took a sip of his water bottle and wiped his face with his towel before going back on stage for his number. "I want to know how ya'll feeling out there?" A.j yelled and the girls never missed a beat. Thats when he saw her. "Oh! oh! AJ's looking right at me!" Someone screamed. Caitlin and Amber laughed at the scean. "Amber," Caitlin smiled. "I think you have an admirer." She laughed at pointed towards the stage. Amber locked eyes with A.j...all the sound seem to drown out, as if.... "Amber!" Caitlin shook her friend. "What?" "Stop drolling." She joked but Amber didn't dare tear her eyes off A.j. "I wrote this song for a very important lady out there...you know who you are." And with that A.j sang sweet words of forever into Amber's heart. ****************************************************************************** "Amber," Caitlin smiled. "I think you have an admirer." She laughed at pointed towards the stage. Amber locked eyes with A.j...all the sound seem to drown out, as if.... "Amber!" Caitlin shook her friend. "What?" "Stop drolling." She joked but Amber didn't dare tear her eyes off A.j. "I wrote this song for a very important lady out there...you know who you are." And with that A.j sang sweet words of forever into Amber's heart.

When you go, I'll start the clock I won't ever, let this moment stop Time is stealing you from me But it can never take this memory

"Amby?"

"What?" She asked looking at Caitlin when she didn't say anything.

"Do you think hes talking about you?"

"Who?" Amber tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Nows not the time to play stupid Amber! AJ!"

"Cate, we're at a concert...they sing to all their fans." Amber reasoned.

"Oh really?"

"Yes!" Amber snaped.

"Then why is he fixed on you." Before Amber could reply Caitlin jerked her around to the stage and was caught once again in AJ's eyes.

Till the stars fall from the sky, Till I find a reason why And even as the years go by Till there's no tears left to cry Till the angels close my eyes And even if we're worlds apart I'll find my way back to you By heart

AJ made his way across the stage to sing to the other fans but he would glance every now and then in Amber's direction.

"Ya know, for someone hes not singing to hes eyein ya pretty damn bad...but hey what do I know."

"Sorry...I gotta go, I'll meet you back at the hotel." Amber said quickly and was about to make her way thru the crowed.

Please dont run...hold me close, baby please Tell me anything, but that you're gonna leave As I kiss this fallen tear I promise you, I will be here.

"Caitlin..."

"Your going to have to see him sooner then later so why not get it over with now! I'm sick and tired of you beating this around the bush...all you guys ever do is talk talk talk and I'm sick of it! You and him need to get your shit together..."

"Caitlin...I.."

"No buts!! It's far past time that you and AJ face the music." She stated as all the guys come back and where beggining to proforme 'Everybody'.

"Caitlin!!"

"I don't care if I have to drag y.."

"Caitlin!!" Amber scremed and shook her friend. Caitlin stood there waiting for what she had to say so damn badly. "As I was saying before you went insane." She laughed. "I know..and your right." She sighed. "I have to face him...get this thing all worked out no matter what, good or bad."

"Amber!" Caitlin whined. "I had a pretty good speech to." Amber giggled. "Just had to ruin my glory moment." Caitlin laughed along with Amber. "So after the show right?" Amber sighed. "Good." Caitlin smiled. "Considering were going to be with them for most of the tour we had better." They laughed and continued to watch the boys.

"After the show." Amber thought to herself as she looked at AJ and giggled as he humped the stage causing the girls to scream.

"Hey Amber." She looked over at Catilin who had amusment written all over her face. "Be the stage." Amber laughed.

"I plan to be." She smirked and laughed at the look Caitlin gave her, one of amusment and pure shock. "Shh." Amber giggled and they watched the end of the show.

After the show was over the girls made their way back stage.

"Ladies, how are you this crazy evening."

"A bit better then you Tommy boy." Calitlin laughed.

"It's not easy being sercurity." He smiled. "I've heard just about every excuse in the book." They laughed.

"Well we got five guys waiting for us, catch ya later!" Caitlin and Amber waved and made their way down the hall twords the boys dressing rooms.

~*~Meanwhile~*~ "Where is she?"

"Oh Nick, pop a midol." Howie snicked and was met by the pillow Nick thru.

"Do you think she got lost? Maybe she didn't make it..maybe.."

"Maybe you need to relax." Kevin laughed and Nick sat down fuming. "I don't know what shes done to you Nicky boy...she got you whipped though."

"Am not, i'm my own man." Brian laughed.

"Right...you keep telling yourself that Nick."

"Hey! Your supposted to be on my side...or does frick and frack mean nothing to you?"

"Chill Nick." Brian laughed. "I'm always on your side." He smiled at his younger brother. "It's just that ever now and then I make an exception." He laughed, Nick was about to say somthing but the knock at the door stoped him.

"One day Bri." Nick glarled at him and Brian blew him a kiss. Nick ran his fingers through his hair and opened the door.

"Caitlin." Nick beamed and scoobed her up in his arms causing her to laugh.

"Nick...you act like its been forever." She smiled. "I saw you before the show."

"Yeah, but that wasn't nearly enough." He sighed and kiss her.

"Well, i've had enough." Howie broke their kiss and gave Caitlin a bear hug.

"Hey!"

"Nick, you have to learn to share...you can't hog her all the time."

"Yeah, besides you talk about her non-stop...we all feel like were dating her." Brian smiled and gave her a hug.

"Yeah but your not so move."

"Hey you!" Kevin hugged her and placed a small kiss on her cheek.

"Kevin!!"

"Nick relax damn!" Kevin laughed and Nick wrapped Calitin in his arms.

"Nick...I...can't...."

"You can't what babe?" He kissed her neck.

"Breathe!!" Nick let her go.

"Thank you." She smiled and turned to the guys. "I have a surprize for all of you."

"What is it?" Howie asked.

"Well, it's more of a person." Caitlin smiled and made eye contact with Brian.

"Who?" Caitlin headed to the door and looked out confused.

"What's wrong?" Kevin asked when Caitlin steped back in.

"Shes not here, I left her right there." Caitlin looked again.

"Who?" Howied repeated.

"Amber."

"Amber!, shes here!" Kevin beamed.

"She was here...I told her to wait right here while I talked to you guys...but she must have let her cold feet get the best of her."

"Shes nervous." Howie concluded. "Theres no reason why she should be, we're the same old guys she grew up with."

"Yeah...I wonder where she went." Caitlin sighed and closed the door.

"Maybe just to get some air....who could blame her with me being this damn sexy." Nick smirked.

"Keep on dreaming Carter." Howie laughed.

~*~Meanwhile~*~ Amber walked down the many hallways backstage to clear her head a little for she saw...him.

"Amber?" A voice asked and she looked up.

"Hey Marcus." She smiled at the man who returned it. "Hows it going?"

"Kinda slow tonight..." He joked.

"Ahh, no fans bothering ya?"

"Naw..I sent them all to Tom." He laughed.

"Is..."

"Yes." Marcus answered with a small smile. "And no matter what anyone says...rather he admits it or not he love you...deeply." Amber gave him a weak smile. Marcus moved from in front of AJ's door to let Amber by. She took a deep breath and opend the door.

Amber walked into the dressing room to find AJ sleeping on the couch. She closed the door and walked slowly over to him, siting on the table next to him. He looked so peasefull yet so troubled. She gently touched his face...the curves in it so fimillar to her yet different. Amber sighed, she knew she has missed him but it was only now when she was in arms lenth of him did it really hit her. She was fighting with herself if werther she should stay or go....her scared side must have got the best of her for she stood up and headed for the door.

"Wait." Came a whisper and Amber froze on the spot as a warm hand touched her shoulder. "Don't go, don't leave me again." Amber turned and faced the eyes that had done so much to her over the past months. Before she could say anything AJ wrapped his arms around her...sighed in contentment. Amber smiled and returned the hug, she could deney it till the end of time of she wanted to but she knew, she knew she loved him....the question is does he still love her?

"Alex...." Amber pulled back from the embrace first. "God I've missed you." She sighed as a small tear excaped her eye. AJ smiled and kissed it away.

"I've missed you to Amby."

"I'm sorry."

"What do you have to be sorry for?" AJ face filled with concern. "You havn't done anything."

"Thats the point Alex." Amber tried to pull away from him but he refused to let her go. "If I had of just told you in the first place all of this wouldn't of happend...it's all my fault all this damn drama is happening."

"Told me what?" AJ rubbed her back gently. Amber bit her bottom lip and looked at the floor. "Told me what?" AJ repeated.

"I really thought that when I came back that these feelings would have left me in some way but the truth is they havn't...they havn't Alex!" Amber cried. "No matter how I look at it..it all comes back to you..and I don't know how to stop this feeling."

"Amby..."

"And I'm not sure if I want to..." She finished in a whisper and wiped her eyes. "I'm not sure I want to." She repeated.

"Amby..." AJ tried again but Amber placed a finger on his lips.

"Alex please..let me finish...I'm afried that if I don't I'll never tell you this." AJ nodded.

"You want to sit?" Amber shook her head no.

"Alex...remember the day I left?" AJ nodded. "Well the minute I got on that plane I relized that I loved you...I wanted to run back but it was to late and I wanted to give you some time to yourself."

"Amber I love you to." AJ smiled and traced her lips with his thumb softly. "In the back of my mind I think I've always have it's just there where put on hold and never really caught back up with me till I was with my mom...how much I thought about you...I missed you."

"What about Krista? Doesn't she mean anything to you?" AJ sighed.

"I'm not going to lie to you and tell you I don't have feelings for her...I made a promise that I wouldn't hurt her and if..."

"If what AJ?.....if we're together?" Amber sighed. "I knew it was to good to be true...i'm to late....maybe we should just accept it."

"Accept what?"

"We just don't fit together." Amber reached for the door again but AJ grabed her. "Alex..."

"Shh..." AJ whispered and kissed her forehead...then the side of her mouth till he reached her lips. Amber didn't return it at first but soon found herself lost in this man. Her arms found their way around AJ's neck and her fingers toyed with the little hairs there causing AJ to moan....a moan that was lost in and found in Amber's mouth. AJ pulled her closer to him...he wanted to feel her...breathe her. His left hand left the small of Amber's back and gentaly masaged her hip. "We fit." He whispered. "In more ways then one." AJ pulled back from the embrace first leaving tiny butterfly kiss' on Amber's face till she opened her eyes...they held so much confusion.

"We...we can't Alex, we can't do this."

"Why not?"

"You love Krista to." Amber sighed. "And I don't want to have to sneek around behind everyones back." AJ looked at the ground...finding it enteresting for the moment.

"I know."

"The only thing it will end up coming down to is you....you'll have to choose sooner of later....but I'm not going to hang around for the later Alex."

"Thats nothing new." AJ looked her dead in the eye as his arger broke thru. "Poor little Amber....you can never do any wrong! I told you I loved you and what did you do? Riped my heart out!"

"Well what did you want me to say? That I loved you back when it wasn't true!"

"Did you honesty thought I would wait for you? Drive myself crazy over you? I did what you told me to do Amber....move on!"

"Your a hypocrite!" Amber yelled.

"That doesn't even make sense! Your right, there is a hypocrite in this room and i'm looking at her!" Amber stared at him in shock...pure shock. She didn't have a comeback for that one thats for sure.

"This is why I left Alex." Amber said softly. "This is why I didn't want to come back in the first place." She pointed between them. "I didn't want to fight with you...hell I still don't but the situation that were in now isn't helping." AJ sighed and ran his fingers thru his hair. After about ten minutes the dangerous slince was broken.

"Look Amber....I'm sorry, for all thats been happening this year and for yelling at you, I just don't knkow what to do with myself and it would be so easy for me to say fuck off....but I can't." He closed his eyes for a brife moment then reopend them. "I can't tell you that becasue I love you....no matter how many times I've tried to shut it out it just comes back a million times stronger and your right, I do love Krista...I'm not the first man to be in this spot." Amber nodded.

"Do you love her or are you in love with her?" She stressed the word in. "Love and in love are two different things Alex."

"Amber don't...."

"I'll make this even easir on you then.....if you had to pick right here and now.....which one of us would it be?"

"I don't see how making me answer this is going to make this any better Amber I really don't...what will you get out of this?"

"The truth...if I don't desereve anything else from you then I think I can have to the truth."

"But you know..."

"Just answer it Alex!!" She sighed and calm down. "Please?"

"Krista." He smiled.

"What's going on guys?" Krista smiled and took at good look at who was talking to AJ. "Oh, hey Amber." She held her arms out and Amber turned back to AJ.

"Thought so." She blinked back tears and made her way out of the dressing room.

"What was that about?" Krista asked, confused about Amber's cold shoulder. AJ sighed and shook his head. This was going to be a long tour.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Amber?" A voice asked as she turned the corner. "Is that you?" She raised her head.

"Brian?" Amber gave him a weak smile and hugged him, god did it feel good to be back there with him. "I've missed you." He smiled.

"And I you." He gently kissed her forehead and pulled back from the embrace. "You look beautiful." Amber blushed.

"Thank you."

"But still you hold so much sadness in your eyes." Amber focused on the ground. "You saw him?" Brian whispered, Amber jerked her head up meet his sad eyes.

"Brian.."

"Shh, it's ok...I'm ok." He reassured her and she laughed.

"So I've heard." She smiled. "You and your new girlfriend." Brian blushed. "I don't think I've ever seen you go beat red before Bri, she must be pretty darn special." She imitated his country accent and they both laughed.

"Well, I have a little confession to make." He smiled.

"Uh oh." Amber joked.

"I don't have a lady friend at the moment."

"But Caitlin..the magazines showed..."

"Aww damn Amby...you should know by now that..."

"It was only a rumor." She laughed and Brian nodded in agreement.

"Caitlin and I where going to go thru this whole plan but...I don't know, I just couldn't do it." Amber laughed at his southern accent that seeped through. "I'm sorry, I really am. I just wasn't thinking straight at the time."

"Aw, your far to sweet Frick!"

"You know that no one will ever compare to you...not in a million years."

"Oh yeah? What about two?" Brian pretended to think and Amber slapped his arm.

"Naw, I'm just playing with you." He smiled and they made their way to the dressing room to talk to the rest of the guys. After that the night went on a little more smoothly, AJ and Krista where no where to be found and that worried Amber a bit but she didn't show it. Soon after that their bodyguards told them it was safe to leave the arena and head back to the hotel. Once outside Brian slipped his hand into Amber's and she just smiled, out the corner of her eye she could see AJ and Kris getting on his bus. They made eye contact for a split second before Nick said something stupid to Caitlin causing her to scream and Amber laughed at the two when Cait chased him up the steps to his.

"I keep telling you Carter, I'm not the one to mess with!" Caitlin yelled after Nick.

"Come on." Brian pulled me up to Nick's bus. "We better get in there before she kills him." They laughed. They got on and made their way to the back where Caitlin was standing tapping her foot.

"What did he do this time Cait?" Amber giggled.

"Acting like a little hornball what else!" Caitlin giggled and Nick opened the door waving a pair of his white boxers.

"I come in peace." He laughed and Caitlin rolled her eyes.

"We should only hope so." Brian muttered and the girls laughed, leaving Nick glaring at Brian.

"You'll regret that!" Nick threw at him and Brian laughed like a little school girl.

"I can see why all the girls like you Nicky." He talked in his best girl impression.

"Brian..." He warned.

"Your so damn cute when your angry."

"That's it, you me and the Nintendo right here right now!" Nick smirked.

"Oh god do they ever quit?" Laughed Caitlin and Amber shook her head no. "Thought so."

"And to think I thought you'd be used to it by now."

"I know." She smiled and they sat up front in the kitchen. "So.."

"So what?"

"So what happened when you went to see AJ?"

"I didn't..."

"Amby." Caitlin reasoned.

"We talked, we kissed..."

"You kissed!" Caitlin smiled. "That's always a good sign."

"Yeah we kissed." Amber smiled remembering the way their lips moved together. "I don't know, when I kissed him it felt...I don't know but I know I felt something."

"Love?"

"Well, I know I love him Cait, but it's so complicated." She sighed in frustration.

"Krista?"

"Yep, she walked in on us." Amber laughed at Caitlin's shocked expression. "She didn't see the kiss though."

"Do you want me to smash her face in for ya Amby cause you know I will." Caitlin went to stand up but Amber pulled her back down and they laughed.

"No."

"Well, the offer stands." She giggled.

"Thank you." Amber smiled as they pulled up to the hotel.

"Come on little ladies!" Brian smiled and held his arms out to Caitlin and Amber.

"Hey!" Nick protested.

"Shh!" We laughed and headed to the back entrance of the hotel, not that they didn't love to the fans just they where extremely tired. As the last ding of the elevator rang and the doors opened they all made it to their rooms for the night saying their goodnights they all turned in.

"I take it your not sharing our room with me tonight Cait?" Amber giggled.

"Naw, I'm gonna sleep with Nicky boy." Amber laughed. "Not like that!" Caitlin giggled.

"Suuuuure." Caitlin gave Amber the finger, laughed and said goodnight. As Amber walked in she was greeted a single white rose and attached with it was a small white evolve. She went into the bathroom, showered and got in the bed holding these items. She opened the small evolve to revile a short note.

Just wanted to say I love you.

Amber smiled down at the card and smelt her rose, no one knew she liked white roses, no one but AJ but she didn't want to get her hopes up just yet.

~*~Meanwhile~*~

“So Missy your going to sleep in here with me tonight huh?” Nick smiled as Caitlin reached and pulled back the covers.

“Yes Mr. Carter.” She giggled. “That is unless you have an objection to that.”

“No no, please be my guest.” Caitlin smiled and got in the bed with Nick. “Thank you.”

“For what Nicky?”

“For being here with me, like this.”

“Ohh don’t think just because I’m in the same bed as you your going to get lucky.” Caitlin joked.

“Damn.” Nick mocked hurt and Caitlin play smacked his arm and laughed. “No. What I mean is thank you for coming out here to see me, I’ve missed you a lot.”

“I missed you to.” Caitlin smiled and kissed the soft spot behind Nick’s ear.

“Whoa there, don’t do that unless you mean it babe.” Nicky joked.

“I’m I turning you on Nick?” Caitlin leaned on him.

“Yes.” He smiled.

“Good.”

“And what are you planning to do about it?” He asked, gently rubbing her arm.

“Nothing.” Caitlin giggled and cut off the lights and tried to sleep.

“Women.” Nick laughed and placed his arms around Caitlin and soon fell into sleep himself.

The next couple of days are what you could call tense. Everyone knew something was up but didn’t want to talk about it seeing it would involve hurting people. Caitlin and Nick where together non-stop, so where Krista and A.j, Amber avoided them as much as possible. She didn’t want to see A.j because then he would be with Krista, which made it that much harder to focus.

“Hey you.” Came a soft voice and Amber looked up to see Brian before her. She smiled.

“Hey.” She returned the softness in tone.

“I brought these for you.” Brian handed her tulips. Amber smiled and took the flowers and smelled them.

“Their my favorite.”

“I know.”

“But why?” Amber asked and place down the flowers on an empty seat next to her. Brian shrugged.

“You’ve been kind of down for the last few days and I wanted to do something nice for you.” He smiled and Amber returned it. “See? There goes that smile that we all know and love. You should try it more often.” Amber laughed. “Ladies and gentlemen did we just hear Amber laugh?” Brian joked and they both laughed.

“It feels good to laugh again.”

“Yeah, but why haven’t you?”

“I haven’t had much to smile about recently.” Amber sighed. “Do you think I’m stupid for still wanting him when I know I can never have him?”

“No.”

“You don’t?”

“No, because I know how you feel. To love someone with all of you and never experience that love back…it’s painful to watch them in love with another.” Brian sighed and looked up and Amber who was looking at the stage.

“Hey Yo Rok? Get your ass up here, rehearsal starting.” Kevin yelled from the stage. Amber laughed.

“Duty calls.” Brian smiled and kissed her cheek. “Come on Nicky boy. You two can suck face later.” Brian laughed and pulled Nick on stage where everyone was waiting to start. Caitlin made her way over to where Amber was and took the seat Brian had been sitting in.

“So, what’s up?”

“Long time no see.” Amber laughed and so did Caitlin.

“Yeah I know, I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s ok.” Amber smiled.

“So how are you holding up? Really.”

“I’m fine I guess.”

“You’ve worked everything out with A.j?”

“No, there’s nothing left to work out between us.”

“Oh really? Then why haven’t you two talked at all in the last two days huh?”

“He’s busy.”

“Busy with what.”

“The tour and stuff…Krista.”

“Oh.” Caitlin said softly.

“Yeah so…he has bigger issues then us.”

“Yeah maybe. But you know you can’t avoid him forever.” Amber looked at Caitlin.

“I’m not avoiding him…”

“Bullshit and you know it.”

“Fine. Maybe I have but so? What am I supposed to do? Sit around in la la land and pretend I don’t have feelings for him when I do?”

“No. Did you tell him you still loved him?” Amber nodded. “What did he say?”

“He loves me and wants to be with me as much as I want to be with him.” Caitlin was confused.

“Wait and minute, hold the phone. You mean to tell me he loves you and you love him and your not together?” Amber nodded again.

“Why!?!” Caitlin screamed and everyone looked at her. Amber giggled and Caitlin felt her cheeks flush. “Don’t mind us guys, girlie gossip.” Caitlin laughed nervously and ran a hand thru her hair. The guys went back to rehearsal and Caitlin turned back to look at Amber. “Why?” She asked in a more appropriate tone.

“You know why Cate.”

“Krista? Girl we could get rid of her a quick.” Amber smiled. “Let me take her on I’ll…”

“Hold on Cate.” Amber laughed.

“I’ll show her the true meaning of the words ass whooping.” Caitlin pretended to be mad only to have a laugh.

“I’m sure you would Cate, I’m sure you would.” Amber’s smile faded. “He loves her and I understand and respect that, I…I just don’t want to ruin his life anymore then I already have you know?”

“I don’t get it, how did you ruin his life?”

Amber sighed. “Maybe I should spell it all out for you. Remember when A.j told me he loved me for the first time?”

“Yeah.”

“Well he had just got over a breakup and I didn’t want to be his rebound chick and ruin our friendship but I did, I broke his heart and I told him over and over again to accept Brian and I and to move on…and he did. He found Krista, she gave him something I couldn’t return to him at the moment…love.”

“Yeah but your heart told you later that you loved him right?”

“Yeah. But it’s not that simple, he loves Krista on some level and I know that the last thing on this earth Alex will do is hurt her.”

“Do you think he loves her the same way he loves you?”

“I don’t know, I don’t care. You know…I went away to free myself of all this pain and heartaches and when I come back it’s all waiting here for me like I’m back where I started.” Amber sighed.

“It will get better Amby, I promise.” Caitlin hugged her.

“Oh and I found out about your and Brian’s plan to get me back together with him.” Caitlin looked down at the floor.

“Are you mad?” she asked softly.

“No.” Amber giggled. “I found it quite amusing.” They both laughed.

“It was all Brian’s ideal.” Caitlin stressed the word all.

“Don’t worry I know. Poor thing told me everything. I find it cute.” Amber smiled and waved at Brian who smiled and waved back.

“All right guys lets try this one more time.” Fatima yelled and the guys got back into place with their dancer. “That’s it guys, I think it’s finally starting to sink in.” She smiled and the guys did to.

“Does this mean…”

“No Nick you can’t get out of rehearsal early.” The rest of the guys laughed.

“But…but…”

“But what Nicky?” Nick smiled and turned to point at Caitlin, who was busy laughing at something Amber had said.

“Oh, sorry Fatima. Nicky’s girlfriend is here and you heard how much he talked about her when they were apart.”

“All he did was talk my ear off about her.” Fatima laughed and so did the guys, all except A.j who was watching Amber. Her smile was something he could only remember in his dreams. A small smile played on A.j’s lips as well when she looked at him and smiled, he returned it. For the first time in two days they had made some sort of progress that was a promise for a friendship in the end, who knows…maybe even more.

“Hey Yo Bone!” Howie yelled and A.j was pulled out of his thoughts, he looked over at Howie who was heading off the stage.

“Rehearsals over man.” He laughed. “Whatever dream world you’re in come back to reality.” Howie disappeared behind the stage. A.j looked back over to Amber in time to see her and Caitlin leaving with Nick and Brian. He looked down and sighed. He had to let her go, for Krista’s sake. A.j looked up and saw Kevin coming towards him so he met him half way and set down in the first couple rows of seats.

“How you hanging’ J?”

“I don’t know, not to bad I guess.” A.j played with his sunglasses. “Ohh.”

“Yeah. Sad huh? I can’t even tell the woman I care for I love her without breaking the others heart.” A.j sighed and closed his eyes.

“Complicated situation. But you know no matter what you do your going to have to hurt someone in the end.” A.j nodded. “Your not only hurting Amber but yourself by staying in a one sided relationship.”

“It wasn’t always one sided, you know that right?” Kevin smiled.

“Yeah J, I know that you really cared for Krista…at one time.”

“The real question is will she understand?”

“Well, Krista is a strong girl…she can handle it but it’s better if you tell her it’s over then by her finding out that you love Amber from someone else.”

“Yeah I know, I just have to find a way to let her down.” A.j sighed and rubbed his tired eyes. “Well you better do it soon, your not the only one who has these feelings for Amby.”

“Who? Kev you don’t…”

“No. Don’t get me wrong, Amber is wonderful inside and out but I don’t see her in that way.”

“Then who?”

“Bone if you have to ask then…”

“Brian.”

“Bingo. Now I love my cousin and I want more then anything to see him happy but I know that what you and Amber have is the real thing and neither of you can live without the other by your side.”

“How?”

“Oh come J, it’s always been there just…hidden. Some place inside of you guys you were in love and didn’t even know it but the time came for you to discover it and you have. Just don’t let it go or you’ll live to regret it.”

“Yeah I know. When she left it tore me apart but deep down she needed a break from all this mess so I let her…I let her go.”

“And that was probably the best thing for both of you. To figure out some things on your own without interference.” A.j nodded.

“I just feel that I lost her as a lover and only gained her as a friend…she wants more, I want more…we both do.”

“And after you break the news to Krista you two can be together. It’s your call J.”

“But a tough one to call but I have to.” A.j stood up and brushed invisible lint of his pants and Kevin stood to.

“When are you going to tell Kris?”

“Now I guess.”

“Better to get it all over with.” Kevin offered a small smile. It wasn’t as if Kevin didn’t like Krista, he did…a lot but he wasn’t going to ruin her relationship with A.j so he kept it quite. A.j and Kevin walked out the arena. What they didn’t know was they weren’t the only people in there. They where so caught up in their conversation that they didn’t notice Krista sitting a couple of rows behind them on the far left. She had heard the whole thing and wasn’t too happy about it.

“He’s not leaving me for that tramp.” Krista stated through gritted teeth. “Over my dead body.” An evil glare flashed thru Krista’s eyes as she thought of a plan to keep A.j and Amber away from each other.

The concert that night was better then ever. The guys did a awesome job as always, not that it would of matter because the fans would have loved them regardless. At the end of the show the boys rushed into their tour bus’ and off to the next city. Nick, Caitlin, Amber and Brian where all on Nick’s bus, while the others where on Kevin’s bus.

“So what can we do now?” Brian asked.

“Play Nintendo.” Nick grinned and went for the controller but Caitlin grabbed it before he could. Nick looked up at her with a very puzzled expression. “Yes?” He smiled.

“No Nintendo tonight.”

“But why?” Nicky whined.

“Nick Carter! I can all this way to see you cause I got so damn sick of your whining of me not being here and when I get here all you want to play is a video game.” Caitlin was being so dramatic and Amber and Brian laughed at the two.

“Caitlin…where have you been all Nicky’s life?” Brian laughed. “We’ve been waiting for someone to come along and break him of his obsession on Nintendo.”

“Oh really?” Amber asked with a grin.

“Yep yep.” Brian smiled.

“I wouldn’t talk if I were you Littrell.”

“Your not suggesting that I have problems with the Nintendo.” Brian asked being very dramatic which caused Amber and Caitlin to laugh.

“Between you and Nick, I don’t know who’s the worst.” Caitlin giggled.

“Yeah yeah.” Nick mumbled as he continue to play with Brian. Amber sat back down next to Caitlin.

“You’re thinking about him huh?”

“Yeah I just…who? I’m not thinking about anything.” Amber tried to hide her thoughts about A.j.

“Look, I’m not dumb…but I’m not going to push the issue anymore…I just want you to be happy.”

“Don’t we all.” Caitlin smiled at her and they watched Nick and Brian compete in the worlds biggest video game challenge”, or so they called it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ A.j sat up front in Kevin's bus by himself. He needed time to think alone about how he was going to break it off with Krista and get Amber in his life permently.

"I wonder if she's thinking about me?"

"Boo!" Amber jumped at the voice and turned around to see whom it belonged to.

"Brian!" She playfully hit him on the arm and he motioned for her to stay quite. "Sorry."

"It's okay." Brian smiled. "I'm kinda ditching security."

"As in you have no kind of bodyguards what so ever?"

"Bingo." Brian smiled and pulled his cap down a little. "Don't want to get recognized."

"But I thought you loved your fans Bri." Amber smiled.

"Oh believe me when I say I do but if we don't keep a low profile all hells going to break loose." Amber giggled. "What?"

"Nothing Bri, nothing." Amber continued to giggle as she made her way out the hotel to catch a cab.

"And where are we off to on such a lovely evening dear Amby?"

"I don't have a planed agenda for today so I guess just to go and have fun."

"Oh well then can I join you? I'll buy you dinner."

"You don't have to bribe me Bri." Amber smiled. "Of course you can come, it's nice to have some company." A cab rolled up and Brian gave him directions. Brian then sat back and looked at Amber.

“What?” He asked innocently. “Do I have something stuck in my teeth?” Amber giggled.

“No.” She smiled. “I’m just wondering as to where you’re taking me.”

“Ahh I see, has anyone ever told you that actions speak louder then words?” Brian smiled.

“Yeah.” Amber replied slowly. “But what does that have to…” Brian silenced her with a finger.

“In all do time you shall know.”

"Brian what's gotten into to you?" Amber smiled.

“Love.” Brian whispered in Amber’s ear and picked up her small hand in his own and planted a feather light kiss on it. “Love.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ “Nick what are you doing?” Caitlin giggled at Nick as she put up her hair in a ponytail.

“Nothing…just admiring you.” Caitlin rolled her eyes.

“Cornball.” Nick rolled off the bed to stand behind her.

“But you love this cornball don’t ya?” He nuzzled his nose in the curve of her neck and she smiled.

“Yes I do.” She turned in his arms and gave him a small peck on the cheek.

“Can Nicky have a little bit better kiss then that?” Nick asked as if he was a small child asking for candy. Caitlin smiled and kissed him more passionate. Nick pulled her small form closer to his body and ran his hands up and down her back. He pulled away to trace her jaw line with butterfly kiss’ and gently sucked on the soft spot between Caitlin’s right ear. “You taste so good.” Nick mumbled against Caitlin’s smooth skin. Caitlin felt her knees get weak and her mind foggy.

“Nick…” She whispered but was unable to finish her sentence. Nick brought his lips back to hers. He slowly traced Caitlin’s lips with his tongue to ask entrance…entrance that Caitlin wouldn’t deny him in a million years. Their tongues met in a warm embrace…almost like a dance to a tuneless song. Nick slowly pulled back from the kiss and a placed two small feather kiss’ on both Caitlin’s eyelids and one last one on her lips as she opened her lust filled eyes.

“Marry me.” He whispered. Caitlin stared at him in complete shock. “Please say something…anything.” His eyes pleaded.

“I…I…” Caitlin backed away from Nick.

“Baby please…” The pounding on the door cut off Nick. “Caitlin I…”

Chapter 13

“Nick! Nick open the door!” Yelled Kevin.

“You better get that.” Caitlin forced out. Nick sighed and went to open the door.

“Well thank you Nick for taking your dear sweet time, really I was in no hurry.”

“Sorry.” Nick muttered.

“Yo Nicky I was just playin.” Kevin smiled then looked at Caitlin. “Am I interrupting something? I can come back later.”

“No! Kev…it’s all right. I was leaving anyways so…” Caitlin grabbed her purse and bolted out the door leaving a tearful Nick and a puzzled Kevin. Nick made his way back to the bedroom with Kevin on his heel.

“I don’t want it to seem like I’m prying and if it does stop me but did…”

“I asked her.” Nick whispered. “I asked her to marry me.”

“She said no?”

“Not exactly, but she didn’t say yes either.”

“Then I did interrupt something.” Kevin sighed.

“No. In a way I think she was relived you interrupted us…maybe even happy.”

“Nick don’t think that way, there could have been a number of reasons why she didn’t responded and you know it.” Kevin reasoned.

“Yeah? Like what?”

“Shock! If anything that should be at the top of your list, ever thought of that? Maybe she’s scared or nervous Nick, marriage is not a step to be taken lightly.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” Nick snapped and looked at Kevin.

“For the last couple of months the only thing that I ever think of is her, all I see is her, all I breathe is her…all I want is her.”

“I understand that Nick, we all do. But why marriage?”

“I love her ok? She loves me. What else is there?”

“Don’t you think your rushing things a bit?”

“No!”

“Nick calm down.”

“No! I can’t believe your saying this and to my face no doubt.”

“Nick your only 23 and have so much to live for, why don’t you give it more time and thought?”

“You of all people I thought would support me on this but I guess I was wrong…very wrong.” Nick ran out the room and shut the door leaving Kevin speechless.

“Just giving you my honest opinion.” Kevin sighed and left the room. *~*Meanwhile*~*

“Brian.” Amber giggled. “Can I open my eyes now?”

“One more minute.” Brian smiled and picked her up.

“Brian!” Amber squealed in delight. Brian smiled but then it quickly faded as he saw a figure in the near distance. "Brian?" Amber asked and slowly opened her eyes.

"What?" He asked and followed Amber's gaze. "Caitlin? Is that you?" Brian and Amber slowly approached the young woman and as they got closer they realized it was indeed Caitlin.

"Caitlin what's wrong?" Amber asked and placed an arm around her friend.

"He-he." Caitlin took a deep breath. "He proposed."

"Nick?"

"Yeah."

"What did you say?" Brian asked softly.

“I didn’t say anything…I couldn’t.” She wiped her eyes.

“It’s ok.” Amber tried to comfort her friend.

“No it’s not ok.” Caitlin stood up. “Nick probably thinks I’m unsure of my feelings for him.”

“Cait look at me.” Brian reasoned. “You and Nick belong together…I’m guessing he’s hurt over this just as much as you are, maybe more.” He sighed. “But if I know one thing is for sure it’s that he loves you. You know that I know that hell, the world knows it!” Caitlin looked at Amber for reassurance.

“It’s true.” She confirmed. “In all my years of knowing that little monkey and all the girls that have blown thru his life…you’re the one.” Amber smiled.

“If only you could see the look in his eyes when he talks about you.” Brian chipped in. “I never thought he’d find someone to love him, I mean really love him…for who he is not only on the outside but for the man within.”

“I do love him…I love him with all my heart it’s just.” Caitlin sighed. “I don’t know…maybe I’m just being stupid.”

“No.” Amber giggled. “Your in love.” She ended in a whisper as a glimpse of A.j flashed thru her mind and she smiled. “Hopelessly in love.”

Chapter 14

“Nick?” Came a voice above the loud music.

“Who wants to know?” Nick slurred and finished the rest of his drink and quickly ordered another. “Look if you’re a fan I love ya and all but not-fucking now.”

“What crawled up your ass and died?” She laughed. “And I hate to burst your bubble but I’m not a crazed fan.” Nick took a closer look at the blonde.

“Yeah whatever.” He mumbled. “Your not the one who just got dumped are you?” He shot back and the blonde’s face changed to hurt but that quickly faded away.

“Hey don’t go around judging me Mr. Backstreet Boy, you don’t know shit about me.” She snapped and Nick looked her over once more. She wasn’t bad looking at all. Nick wondered if she was always this fiery.

“Do you always go around acting like a bitch?”

“No.” She replied simply and twisted a piece of hair around her finger. “It’s just your lucky day.” She turned her gaze to the dance floor as Missy’s “Work It.” Filled the room. “Fancy a dance?” Nick was about to blow her off when she dragged him out to the dance floor. **************************

“You know you guys don’t have to hang with me.” Caitlin whispered as they sat in a small restaurant.

“Nonsense. We’re your friends.” Brian took her hands in his and smiled. “We can’t help it if we care.” Caitlin looked over to Amber and smiled. “What?” Brian asked.

“Your so sweet Bri.” The girls laughed in unison.

“I find that very cute.” Amber smiled and placed a small kiss on his cheek.

“Are you blushing?" Caitlin giggled and caused Brian to blush even more but in embarrassment.

"Ladies, ladies." A voice spoke and they turned around to be met with a smiling A.j. "I assure you that even though Brian is a cutie." A.j mocked a girly voice and pinched Brian's cheeks. “I’m so much better!” He joked.

"Oh, quit it." Brian laughed and swatted his hand away. They all sat there having a friendly conversation when Amber glanced over at A.j, who had been surprisingly quite since he arrived. She noticed him staring at her, for once he didn't have on those sunglasses and she could see right thru him...to his soul. Amber didn't know but that was exactly what A.j wanted her to do...see him and feel his feelings so that then she couldn't deny them if she tried.

“Hey.” Came a soft whisper and Amber looked back over at A.j who smiled and moved closer to her side of the booth. Brian was to busying making Caitlin laugh to notice.

“What’s up?” The words left Amber’s lips in the same tone.

“A lot.” A.j sighed and ran a hand thru his hair. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking…” He paused. “You could call it soul searching.” Amber nodded. A.j began to play with the end of his shirt. He was nerves as shit about now…who wouldn’t? Explaining how you feel isn’t always easy to do. Amber gave him a soft smile and placed her hand over his.

“You want to go someplace more quite?” She offered and A.j’s head shot up.

“Yeah…if you don’t mind. We really need to talk, this whole “everything is fine” method were on isn’t….”

“Say no more, I understand…completely.” Amber smiles and A.j returns it. “Ugh…guys?” Amber break into Caitlin and Brian’s laughing fit. “I’m tired…I’m going to head back to the hotel.”

“Oh…what me to come with?” Brian asks.

“Naw…that’s ok.” Amber and A.j rise from their seats. “Alexander has volunteered for that job tonight.” She smiled and hugged Caitlin goodnight, she had missed the slight pain that flicked thru Brian’s eyes. “Night B.” Amber and A.j waved as they made their way out the restaurant. Brian let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding.

“Still got it bad for her I see?” Brian turned back to face Caitlin.

“Yeah…and in the worst way.”

“Aww…B.” Caitlin rubbed his back, which caused him to smile. “You know if I wasn’t so caught up on Nick I could fall for ya!” She joked.

“Really?” Brian played along.

“Oh yeah.” They laughed. “In a heartbeat!”

“You are far to much Caitlin…far to much.” Brian smiled. He had only known Caitlin for a little while but already knew that they would grow to be great friends.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She smiled, which only made Brian laugh.

“Nothing just…I know why Nick is so crazy about you, he told me he couldn’t live without it…if I was him I’d feel the same way.”

“Really?” Her eyes sparkled and Brian nodded. “And what does he love about me the most?”

“Easy…your essence. You bring new meaning to his life. I never knew you could fall so fast and so hard but whatever you did you have that boy hooked.” Caitlin smiled.

“I never expected to find him either but…”

“Destiny had other plans right?”

“Yeah.” She giggled. “I’m thankful for it to.”

Chapter 15

“Are you really tired?” A.j asked after a while of walking with Amber. The night was cool and music could be heard all over the place.

“No…you?” A.j shook his head. A few more minutes passed and A.j suddenly pulled Amber's arm and started running. “Where a-are we going?” Amber asked, trying to keep up with A.j. “Are we being chased?”

“No.” A.j replied simply and stopped once he reached his destination.

“You had me run, in heels no less, to see a deserted beach?” Amber laughed and A.j rolled his eyes.

“It's quite here…I used to come here a lot on other tours when I needed to think. No ones ever around, it's nice to have peace once in a while and you know with my life style that comes about every blue moon.”

“Wish I could say I do but I've never been a Backstreet Boy.” She joked but A.j didn't hear her. Instead he took her hand and they began to walk down the beach into the darkness. Soon they grew tired and A.j laid his jacket in the sand for him and Amber.

“This year has been pretty crazy huh?” A.j broke the ice.

“Yeah…a lot of shocking surprises.” Amber smiled and wrapped her arms around herself as a cool breeze came thru. A.j noticed and moved over closer and placed his arms around Amber.

“Better?” He whispered in her ear. Amber trembled under his touch no long cold just scared…scared of her feeling. Being this close to something you know you can't have was driving her crazy.

“Yea.” Her reply was carried in the passing wind. “God he smells good”, Amber thought to herself. A.j sighed continently as he held her. He had held Amber many times but this time was different…much different. They just sat there watching the wind dance upon the ocean under the night sky. “What are we doing?” Amber asked after sometime.

“Hm?” A.j had closed his eyes and was nuzzling her hair.

“You and I…w-what are we doing?” Against her better judgment and the fact that she didn't want to move from his embraces but did. “One minute we say it's better if we don't…”

“I never said that.” He whispered and moved a piece of stray hair in her face. “You did.”

“Your right…I did, only because I think it's for the…”

“Please don't say the best.” A.j pleaded. “You and I both know that what's best is for us to be together…I want you…I…”

“No…don't say it A…”

“I love you.” Amber wiped away a tear that had escaped from her eye. “Baby girl…don't cry, I hate to see you cry…especially when it's because of me.”

“Krista Alex, Krista.” Amber spoke with all the strength she could find at the moment.

“I don't want her! I thought I did but I don't…I have always loved you Amby. I know we could both go our separate ways in life and eventually be fine but why? Id never stop thinking of you. You're more then just a woman I love…you're my best friend. The one I can always depend on to pick me up no matter how deep I fall.” He paused and lowed his voice. “I pray to god I haven't lost her.” A.j wiped away some of his own tears.

“You say that now but what if down the line you find out that I'm not the one.” She matched his tone. A.j meet her eyes and in the distance a song played. A.j pulled Amber back into his embrace.

"No." He sighed. "Your going to love me....like I know you do."

"I'm scared though Alex." She confessed into his shirt.

"Aren't we all? I was scared of my feelings for you Amby! Scared of loving you when I know you deserve so much better...someone like..."

"Brian?" AJ nodded. "AJ...Brian's a wonderful man and any woman would be lucky to have him but...he'll never be you."

"I'm gonna love you all my life," AJ whispered and placed a gentle kiss on Amber's ear, she let out a soft laugh. “What's so funny?” He asked, a little amused himself.

“Your goatee…tickles.” AJ chuckled.

"Sorry." Amber looked deep into the eyes of a man that she no longer could doubt she was in love with.

"I want you." She whispered. "No matter how I look at it or try to deny it I know it's true...it's only been to clear to see..."

“Right in front of us.” AJ lightly tapped Amber's nose and she giggled. The laughter soon died down as the two just stood taking in each other. AJ cupped Amber's cheek gently memorizing every inch, every curve of her face never breaking eye contact.

"What are you thinking?" AJ sighed.

"Nothing...just trying to remember this moment."

"I know the feeling." She smiled but AJ didn't return it, instead he just looked at her...studying the way her eyes light up when she's happy, little things he didn't even notice before where all showing themselves to him.

"I love you." He whispered for what seemed forever and gently captured her lips with his own. Not shocked nor scared Amber returned his kiss. I love you to was a response lost within his mouth. AJ pulled her closed, afraid to let go, afraid that he would awaken from another cruel dream, but a dream this was far from.

AN: Hey dancinpacer03, I've been meaning to write you and thank you for all your wonderful reviews and thanks for referring sweet18_2003 to my story as well. Your the only reason I still post on here now so thank you sooooo much *smiles* I'll update soon! Destiny