“I want it right here,” Bianca Parker said as she turned around and lifted her tank top, exposing the small of her back.

The large man placed his hand on her back as if making a silent observation and then nodded. Motioning toward the chair across the room, he disappeared before coming back with an outline of the Chinese characters Bianca had chosen to be the permanent mark on her body. They meant Strength and Love; the only two things Bianca thought anyone could ever need in the world.

Sitting down in the chair, she rolled her tank top up enough for the guy to put the outline on her skin. After a few minutes, he let her know that it was on and asked her if it was in the right spot.

Bianca looked down, but as much as she turned and twisted, she just couldn’t see it. “I dunno…what do you think Holly? Does it look okay where he put it?”

Briefly looking up from the magazine in her hands, Bianca’s long time friend, Holly Michaels sighed. “Why don’t you get up and look in the mirror?”

“Because I thought it would be easier to have you tell me since neither of us would have to move,” Bianca said with a mega watt grin that caused Holly to roll her eyes.

“You’re one lazy bitch,” she joked good-naturedly. “Yeah, it looks good there. So, what do you think Dale is gonna think of the tattoo?”

Bianca’s smile faded at the question. “Why should I be worried about what he thinks?”

Holly just shrugged. “I thought you might get a little input from your boyfriend. I mean, if it were AJ, I could understand.”

The words had left Holly’s mouth before she realized it, and Bianca stiffened. “Well, just so you know, Dale and I broke up.”

She hadn’t really wanted to talk about it, but she figured there was no better time than the present. Ever since her break-up with Backstreet Boy AJ McLean, her love life had been on a steady downhill track. The current man in her life, well, ex man, had been NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. The two had met at one of his races and had been dating roughly a month before Bianca decided that they didn’t work well together.

“Sorry,” Holly gave her a sympathetic look.

Bianca just shrugged and smiled at the man seated beside her.

“Ready?” he almost grunted.

“Yep,” she said and took a deep breath as she waited for him to begin.

---

“You know what? This is fucked up,” Nick Carter yelled across the room at his fellow band mate, AJ McLean. “If you could get with the program, we could get outta here sometime today!”

“Look, when little Nicky can grow up just a tiny bit come get me, okay? I’m gonna go have a cigarette,” AJ looked pointedly at Brian and Kevin before walking out of the studio room.

“He’s such an asshole,” Nick mumbled before leaving as well.

“Well, that’s great, don’t ya think?” Brian said and looked at Kevin and Howie.

They were both sitting quietly on the couch. Kevin looked rather disinterested in the events taking place around him and Howie just looked very uptight. They had been in the studio for two weeks now, but they had gotten next to nothing accomplished. The obvious tension between AJ and Nick and Kevin’s severe lack of interest in the group had proven that it would be much harder to get anything done at all.

“Well, okay then,” Brian said to himself. “I’m gonna go call Julie. If they come back before I’m finished, come get me.”

Making his way outside, Brian pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed the number to his closest friend. After three rings, he heard her answer. “Hey Jules.”

“Heya Duckie!” she greeted happily. “What are you doing? I thought you were busy, busy, busy?”

“Yeah, well, too much drama going on to actually get anything done. Nick and AJ are at each others’ throats and Kevin’s mind is just not here. I decided I would do something productive.”

Julie could practically hear him grinning and she laughed. “Well, thanks.”

“So, have you given any thought to what I asked you the other day?”

“Oh, well, I dunno, Duckie.”

“Okay,” Brian sighed, unable to mask his disappointment. A few weeks earlier he had asked Julie to fly out to L.A. to visit him while he was there with the Boys. At first she had just been hesitant, but now she seemed like she didn’t want to come at all. “It’s okay, I understand that you’re busy.”

“Brian, it’s not that I don’t wanna come, but I don’t want to get in the way when you’re out there to work,” she explained quickly. “It just seems like you have enough distractions.”

“Julie, I want you out here,” Brian said almost pleadingly. Clearing his throat, he sighed. “I mean, it would be really nice to have someone here that I don’t feel any tension with. I need a break from these guys, and I’m not gonna get one any time soon.”

“Okay, Duckie,” Julie said quietly. She could tell he was being completely serious about needing a break. “I’ll come visit.”

“Great,” he said excitedly.

---

AJ walked into warm May morning and sucked in a deep breath. He was fuming, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to let anyone else know that. Pulling out his pack of cigarettes, he looked at them for a second before slipping them back into his shirt pocket. He had been trying to quit for months now, but it never failed…he would always break down and have one. And it always went from there. At least it’s smoking and not drugs and alcohol, he thought thankfully.

When he heard the door open, he turned and found Howie staring at him with a concerned expression on his tanned face. “You okay man?”

AJ turned back and looked out at the smog covered city and rolled his eyes. He did his best not to let out an irritated groan as he gave a short nod. “I’m peachy. Can’t you tell?”

Howie grimaced at his friend’s thick sarcasm. “Sure. So, are you coming back in there soon? I think Nick cooled down a little.”

“What Nick needs to do is grow up,” AJ snapped before he could catch himself. Damn it. “I’ll be in there in just a few minutes.”

“Okay,” Howie’s voice was uncertain, but AJ heard the door shut and knew he was once again by himself.

Nick and AJ had been going at each other for months now, and it was usually initiated by Nick. Ever since he and Nick had gotten into a fight in the middle of a popular Manhattan club eleven months earlier, Nick had done his best to provoke AJ. Trying to get him to the breaking point. Luckily, AJ’s fuse was a lot longer than it used to be and he was able to put up with the crap Nick did or said.

All because of a woman, AJ thought sadly. Bianca. He hadn’t seen or heard from her since that fateful night in June, but he had heard about her. Ever since he walked away and Nick walked out on her, Bianca seemed to have gone wild. From various tabloids and entertainment shows on television, AJ gathered that she was the female Colin Farrell; it seemed like every time he turned around there was a new guy on her arm.

And he also knew that she had started drinking. Even though he hadn’t had any contact with Bianca, he knew from friends that had seen her out and about that her wild side was in full swing. Unlike Bianca, AJ had calmed down quite a bit. He wasn’t dating anyone seriously and although he had been out a few times to movie premiers or other events, he wasn’t being a celebrity man-whore. He had grown past that stage in his life; at least that’s how he felt.

Stomping out the cigarette he had subconsciously pulled from the pack and started smoking while he had been lost in thought, AJ let out a breath and turned to head back inside. He was sure that he would have to retreat out of the studio room later in the day. After all, it was only 9:30 am.

---

“Nick, what is your problem?” Brian whispered to the 23 year old blond who hade come back and sat down beside Kevin on the couch.

“Why is it always my problem?” Nick started defensively. “Why don’t you blame AJ sometimes?”

“Because, Nick, you started this today. What has gotten into you?” Howie asked as he entered the conversation.

“Where do you get off? Are you my fucking mother?”

“No, I’m not, but-”

“That’s damn right, you’re not. Keep that in mind,” he said in a bratty voice.

“Look, Nick, all I’m saying is that you need to let some things go and move on, okay? What happened months ago is over and it’s really sad that you’re still hanging onto that,” Howie said and watched as Nick’s cheeks began to turn an angry shade of red.

“What do you know about what happened?”

“Enough,” came Howie’s curt reply.

“Fuck you,” Nick yelled.

“That’s it!” Brian cried and got between the two men who were now standing toe-to-toe. “I’m sick of this bullshit! You go over there and look at a magazine or something. And you,” he motioned to Nick, “come with me.”

Nick huffed angrily, but followed Brian from the studio room and down the hall to an empty conference room. Going into the dark room, Nick slumped down in a chair and looked at the glossy, cherry table in front of him as he waited for his lecture.

“What’s up with you, man?” Brian asked patiently as he sat beside his friend. “You’re not being yourself, Nick.”

“Well, what do you want me to do?” Nick asked hatefully ignoring Brian’s sympathetic glances.

Brian knew that the last few months had been hard for Nick. He had walked out on Bianca calling that one of the hardest decisions of his life. And although Brian knew it was hard and he loved Bianca like a sister, he was glad Nick had decided to do what he did.

They both needed time to grow up and become their own person and he knew that if things were meant to work out, they would. But there was no telling Nick that. “Come on, man, you know you can talk to me.”

“Look, Brian, I’m really thankful that you care, but there’s nothing to talk about,” Nick’s tone was even as he stood and waited for Brian to “dismiss” him.

“Okay,” Brian nodded sadly and watched the younger man leave the room.

Kevin picked his cell phone up off the table and looked around at the eyes staring back at him. “Look, since we are obviously not gonna get anything done here today, I’m leaving, okay?”

“See, that’s what I’m talking about,” Nick’s voice came over the mic from the other side of the glass. “He’s bailing out now. Why not just scrap the whole album if you can’t stick around?”

“Well, maybe I would want to stick around if you didn’t pick a fight with someone every five seconds,” Kevin retorted quickly as he glared at Nick. He watched as Nick mouthed his new favorite words—‘fuck you’—and just sat in front of the mic with a scowl on his face.

“C’mon man, we have a lot to do, and not a lot of time to do it,” Brian said in a pleading voice. He knew that their time in the studio was bound to run out if they kept this up. “Why not just stay and we’ll work on different stuff?”

“No. I’m sick of being around children,” Kevin replied rather snidely and watched as a look of hurt flickered in his cousin’s eyes. “Why don’t we just take the rest of the week off and come back and try and start fresh on Monday?”

“Fine,” Brian said with a short nod.

Kevin forced a tight lipped smile and turned around, quickly exiting the studio room before anyone else could try and get him to stay. He was in no mood to deal with the constant battle being waged between Nick and AJ. He just wanted to be alone and ignore the rest of the world like he had been doing since the summer.

At first, it had been all too easy to put on his celebrity mask and be all smiles for the media, but it was becoming increasingly harder with each passing day. He hadn’t seen his ex-fiancée or his daughter since early June of the year before. After the tension that had started building between his two younger band mates had finally come to a head, Kevin had gone home where he expected to find his future wife and daughter safe and sound in the comfort of their cozy Kentucky home. Instead, all he found was a bare cabin that showed no signs of a loving family. The only traces left of his family were a picture of Kyra and a short note from Brianna.

Kev,

I’m sorry to do this to you, but I can’t keep doing this. I need stability right now, and that’s something that I just can’t get from you. I love you deeply…don’t ever forget that! But I just need to do my own thing right now. I’m so sorry, baby. I love you.

Bree

After nearly destroying the home he had designed just for them, Kevin sank to his knees in front of the fireplace. On the mantle was the only other picture of his family. Taken the previous May outside on the large wraparound porch, Kevin and Brianna stood holding their daughter; both smiling brightly at the prospect of starting their new life together. All those hopes and dreams were gone now, and all Kevin felt anymore was emptiness. How could it be fair?

Pulling into the busy Los Angeles traffic, Kevin tried his best not to let his emotions take over. All he needed was to forget and he knew exactly what would help.

---

“Hey, Bean, have you seen this?” Holly asked as she flipped through one of many supermarket tabloids.

Bianca glanced at her friend as they waited in line in the small grocery store in her home town. “No, what is it?”

They had spent a better part of the afternoon checking out Wilmington before coming home and now they were getting the cream Bianca would need to take care of her new tattoo. Bianca gave her friend a strange glance when she gave a nervous laugh and bit her lip.

“Give me that,” Bianca said and pulled the tabloid from Holly’s grasp. She quickly skimmed the page when the article caught her eye.

In big bold letters the headline read: Bianca—Buck Wild. Miss Parker is all for Hollywood…

“Oh my god,” she said quietly as she skimmed the article.

While most people think Bianca Parker is the average, squeaky clean Pop Princess, we beg to differ. It’s been reported recently that the 21 year old chart topper has been spotted leaving several midnight hot spots on the arms of various high-ranking Hollywood heart-throbs. The most recent has been NASCAR hunk Dale Earnhardt Jr. Parker has also been rumored to have been dating Incubus front man, Brandon Boyd and resident bad boy Eminem. The rumor mill has been in full swing about the singer’s current status since her highly publicized break-ups from Backstreet Boys Nick Carter and AJ McLean—to whom she was also engaged.

A source close to Parker stated that “Bianca has been headed downhill very quickly since her break-up with AJ. Her moods fluctuate a lot and she’s been partying to cover it all up.”

The rest of the article was filled with the same nonsense, but the last sentence caught her attention.

Miss Parker declined to comment when contacted.

“I was never contacted about this,” she cried.

“Excuse me, if you aren’t gonna pay for your stuff, I would like to pay for mine,” a woman huffed in an exasperated tone and pushed past Bianca and Holly.

“Go ahead,” Bianca said and stepped out of the line. “And who was the ‘source’ that’s so damn close to me?”

Furious, Bianca dropped everything onto the empty check out counter by the automatic doors and stormed out to Holly’s car. She had a feeling she knew who might be behind this and there was only one way to find out.

---

Howie looked over at Brian who was seemingly lost in thought. After Kevin walked out for a long weekend, Nick and AJ had gone their separate ways until Monday so he and Brian decided to go grab something to eat. Now they were stuck in traffic with no signs of getting out any time soon.

“You okay, Brian?” Howie asked as he inched the car forward a few inches.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, I’m great,” Brian smiled and ran a hand through his dirty blonde curls. “I just wish this traffic would let up.”

“Come on, Bri, I know you. Don’t try and pretend that nothing is bothering you,” Howie looked at him with a serious expression.

Brian sighed forlornly and shrugged. “I dunno…I just feel like everything that can go wrong will. I was so excited about us getting back in the studio and now nothing is working. And then there’s Julie. I dunno what’s going on, but she just seems really reluctant to come visit me out here.”

“Well, first, I know what you mean about getting back to work. I was really happy to be working again, but AJ and Nick need to get past their problems and Kevin needs to sort through his situation before we can all be as focused as we need to be. And about Julie, I’m sure she just doesn’t want to intrude on us. Not that she will, but maybe she feels like she will,” Howie said with a smile. “I think maybe you just need to talk to her.”

“I have. I called her today and she finally agreed to come visit for a few days or so, but I still don’t feel like she wants to come. You know?”

“I wouldn’t think that she doesn’t want to see you though,” Howie replied and sighed gratefully when the traffic began to move a little more.

“Anyway,” Brian said after a minute of silence. “Are you still seeing, uh, what’s her name?”

Howie laughed at Brian as a slight blush crept across his cheeks, but nodded. “Yeah…Mia. And don’t worry, I know you and the other guys haven’t really met her yet.”

Brian laughed, but he was still embarrassed about not knowing her name. “So, you are going out again?”

“Yeah, sometime this weekend. It’s nothing serious or anything though,” Howie said casually.

Brian nodded. He was just happy that his friend was finally getting back into the dating scene. He knew that Howie had been having a hard time after losing his girlfriend Ivy almost a year and a half earlier, but he had finally learned to cope with it and he was moving on.

“I will be so glad to get out of this traffic. I’m starving,” Howie mumbled.

Suddenly, the shrill sound of Brian’s cell phone sliced through the air startling both of them. Checking the caller ID, Brian saw the block letters that read BEAN’S CELL.

“Hello?”

“Brian?” Bianca questioned, the angry tone in her voice was evident.

“Yeah, what’s up, Bean?”

“What is Nick’s new cell phone number? I really need to talk to him.”

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked concerned.

“I just need to talk to Nick and I would really appreciate it if you could give me the number,” she answered as she began to lose patience.

“Okay, okay,” Brian said quickly and then rattled off the familiar digits. As soon as the final number was out of his mouth, Bianca had ended the call leaving Brian very confused.

“What was that about?” Howie asked. His expression seemed to mirror Brian’s.

“I have no idea, but she was pissed about something.”

“It’s about time,” Howie said quietly as the traffic finally began to pick up. “Maybe we’ll get to have dinner before midnight.”

---

Nick walked into his hotel suite and flopped across the bed, letting himself relax. Sitting up to look around the spacious room, he groaned and realized that he should have accepted Howie and Brian’s offer to get some dinner. Instead, he was stuck here alone. Bored out of his mind.

He entertained the thought of dragging out one of his game consoles, but decided against it. Picking up the room service menu, he glanced over it and decided he was pretty hungry. After ordering a cheeseburger and fries and a large banana split, he changed into an old t-shirt and shorts and made himself comfortable on the bed, flipping through the channels on his television. While he waited for his dinner, Nick scanned the movie channels and decided he wanted to see Daredevil.

“I’m all set for the night,” he smiled happily to himself. “I don’t need anyone else to keep me occupied.”

After his cheeseburger was brought up and he was just getting into the movie, his cell phone began to ring. Groaning to himself he picked it up and answered without checking his caller ID.

“Hello?”

“You son of a bitch! What the hell is your problem?” Bianca’s voice rang loudly in his ear.

“Bean?”

“How could you pull something like that?” she cried, obviously upset.

“How could I do what?” Nick asked, thoroughly confused. “What’s going on?”

“Have you seen the Enquirer?”

“No, I haven’t. Why?”

Bianca then began to read the article to Nick. “Why do I get the feeling you were that source, Nick?”

Furious and trying his best not to explode, Nick took a deep breath and let it out very slowly. “Look, Bianca, I don’t know who told them that, but it wasn’t me. Besides, don’t you know not to believe everything you read?”

“I don’t believe you, Nick,” she yelled and he had to pull the phone away from his ear.

“Well guess what?” he cried, finally losing all patience. “I really don’t give a rat’s ass what you believe. I didn’t go and tell some tabloid anything about you, but whoever did sure gets my approval. They should have talked about what a spoiled little brat you are. How you always have to be a diva!”

“Fuck you, Nick.”

“No thanks, baby,” he replied with a smirk he was sure she could hear through the phone. He listened as she let out an irritated shriek and then hung up.

Switching off his cell phone, Nick leaned back against the headboard of the bed and clenched his fists. Where did she get off calling and accusing him of spilling that information to a sleazy tabloid? He was going to kill Brian for giving her his new number.

(This chapter is dedicated to my buds Joolligan and Soosie! Hope ya love it! =P)

AJ walked into his darkened suite and dropped his card key on the table by the door. Since Kevin had left the studio earlier that day, the guys had all agreed that he had been right. A few days away from one another were definitely what they needed, and AJ was more than happy to be away from Nick. Constantly fighting was not how he wanted to spend the next few weeks, but he knew that the way things were going it was bound to turn out like that.

Plopping down on the large sofa, AJ grabbed up the remote control and began channel surfing. What a great way to spend my days off, he thought with a cynical snort. After passing countless infomercials about weight loss remedies and get rich quick schemes, he settled on a rerun of Newlyweds on MTV.

“A marathon…great,” he mumbled to himself as the show faded from yet another dimwitted remark from Jessica Simpson to a far too long string of commercials. Laughing to himself he shook his head. “If only beauty equaled brains.”

Just as he was about to turn the television off and head to bed, one of those vacation commercials flashed onto the screen. It was almost like a light bulb had been turned on and he snatched up the telephone. He knew just how to spend his long weekend. After a quick phone call to make arrangements, AJ dialed Kevin’s cell phone and waited to see if he would answer.

“Hello?” came Kevin’s stiff voice after five rings.

“Kev, man, what are you doing?” AJ asked in a bright tone.

“What do you want AJ?”

“Look, I know that you thought you were gonna have a nice weekend alone, moping in your hotel or in some bar, but you are so wrong.”

“What are you talking about?” Kevin asked in an exasperated tone of voice. “Shouldn’t you be doing something other than bugging me?”

“Okay, yes, you have a point Kevin,” AJ said quickly so Kevin wouldn’t hang up on him. “I just called to tell you to back a pag.”

“AJ, have you been drinking?” Kevin deadpanned.

“What?! No! Sorry…PACK a BAG, man.”

“Pack a bag? Are you out of your mind, AJ?”

“Do you even have to ask me that, Kev? C’mon, man, don’t ask questions…just do as I ask, okay? Listen to me for once.”

AJ listened closely as Kevin grew quiet. He knew that even though Kevin was a big hard ass, being told to pack a bag had intrigued him. But had it intrigued him enough to actually listen to AJ? Come on, Kev.

“You’re not gonna go and get my ass arrested are you?” Kevin finally asked.

“Well, you know…if I can, I will,” AJ grinned to himself.

---

Bianca rode in bored silence as she picked at her perfectly manicured fingernails. Letting out a sigh, she turned to stare out the window, wondering why she had to leave tonight instead of in the morning. After a few minutes, the car finally lurched to a stop in front of the airport.

Madd Dog quickly climbed from the front seat of the car and opened the door for Bianca. “Why do you look so pissed tonight?”

“I’m not pissed,” she huffed and rolled her eyes. “I’m just tired.”

“Uh huh,” the burly bodyguard raised a skeptical eyebrow but let the subject drop for the time being.

Bianca let out a tired sigh as she plopped into her first class seat and waited for the plane to take off. Red eye flights were definitely not at the top of her favorites list, but in this case, she really didn’t have much of a choice. LA then Vegas…that was her schedule for the next few days. Interviews, small concerts and hardly any time to herself that was what her life consisted of nowadays. But it was everything she had ever wanted, so she wasn’t going to start complaining.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Madd Dog’s booming voice broke into her thoughts.

With a curt nod, Bianca turned her face to the dark window and pretended to be asleep. In a few hours she would be in Los Angeles ready to be Miss Celebrity, but until then, she only wanted to be left alone.

---

Nick woke up to bright beams of sunlight shining in his eyes. Sitting up, he groaned and scrubbed a hand over his face before checking the clock. 8:11 Nick bolted from the bed in a sudden frenzy. He was going to be late; the guys would kill him. Then, as suddenly as he had come off the bed, he remembered that he didn’t have anywhere to be. A long weekend via Kevin’s orders.

Breathing a quick sigh of relief, Nick fell back onto the king sized bed and draped an arm over his eyes. After a few minutes, he realized that he wasn’t going to be able to fall asleep again and he decided to get dressed and go for breakfast.

Not wanting to be stuck in his hotel alone all day, Nick decided to walk to the small café just down the street from his hotel. After he ordered his coffee and a muffin, for lack of anything better, Nick picked up a newspaper and headed for a table near the back away from everyone.

Taking off his baseball cap, Nick ran his hand through his disheveled hair. I need to get a haircut soon, he thought. Just as he began to skim over the headlines of the morning newspaper a commotion at the entrance of the café caught his attention and he turned to see what was going on. He nearly choked on his muffin when he caught site of what was happening.

Bianca had just walked in, but she wasn’t alone. It would have been better if she had been alone; he would have been able to ignore her. Turning around quickly, Nick hoped they hadn’t spotted him in his corner.

His shoulders slumped in disappointment as he heard the ever familiar voices behind him.

“Yo, dawg, look who it is!” a nasal voice cried over the other people. “Yo, Bean, it’s Nick.”

Nick groaned loudly as he turned to find Bianca staring at him and none other than Justin Timberlake on her arm. “This is a new low,” he mumbled to himself and gathered his things so he could make his way out of there; suddenly, there was not enough space for him.

“Nick,” Bianca’s cold voice was suddenly behind him.

He stood up and turned around, plastering a huge smile onto his face. “Hey Bean, nice to see you and you’re new friend.”

“I believe you know who he is, right Nick?” Bianca’s voice had taken on a sudden hint of snobbishness.

“It’s just Justin,” Justin said as he came and wrapped his arm around Bianca’s waist.

“I would have to say this is a new low for you,” Nick said as Justin was distracted by something on the other side of the coffee shop.

“Oh, do I sense a hint of jealousy, Nick?”

Before Nick could give her his reply (“Me jealous? Of HIM?”) Justin cried out excitedly.

“Look!” he said pointing across the busy street. “Drums!”

Bianca gave him a quizzical look and just nodded.

“Here,” Justin said thrusting something at Bianca. “Hold my jacket.”

Bianca and Nick just stared after Justin as he ran quickly from the café.

“Yeah,” Nick said with a short nod. “I’m really jealous.”

Bianca blushed furiously as Nick pushed past her and out the door.

---

“Man, this is the life,” AJ mumbled sleepily as he awoke in his king sized bed. Sitting up, he looked around at his suite and smiled. Leaning over to the bedside table, he picked up the phone and dialed the number to Kevin’s suite and waited for him to answer.

“What?”

“Wake up call,” AJ tried his best to make himself sound like a woman.

“AJ, you’re a dick,” Kevin’s voice was still thick with sleep.

“Hey, man, don’t resort to name calling, okay?” he sounded offended. “But if you wanna sleep this wonderful Las Vegas day away, you go right ahead. I’m going down to the casino to test my luck.”

“Just don’t lose it all,” Kevin said and hung up.

“Yeah, right,” AJ said to himself as he got up and got dressed. “Luck is my middle name.”

Brian sighed to himself and aimlessly flipped through the television channels, finding nothing on. Surfing past all the movie channels, he gave the telephone a sideways glance almost willing it to ring. This is ridiculous, he thought as he snatched up the receiver. He dialed the number, hesitating before punching in the last digit, and then gave a defeated sigh. If I call, I’ll just seem desperate, but if I don’t, she might think I don’t want to talk to her.

Silently berating himself, Brian placed the phone back on its cradle and resumed his boring task of channel surfing. He had been contemplating all day about whether he should call Julie or not, and all day he had not been able to get the entire number dialed. What was his deal? It wasn’t like this was someone he was calling for the first time. Damn, why was he suddenly so nervous about talking to her?

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his door. One of the guys had most likely come to bug him until he agreed to go out or play a video game. Begrudgingly, Brian stood up and slowly made his way to the door. Whoever was on the other side had become impatient and decided that he wasn’t coming fast enough.

“Yeah, yeah, hold on. I’m coming,” he called before opening the door.

“Duckie!” Julie cried, throwing her arms around his neck when she saw him.

Immediately, Brian’s mood brightened. “Jules, what are you doing here?”

“Well, if that’s the greeting I get, maybe I should just go back home,” she teased and lightly pushed him out of her way. “I thought you wanted me to come visit.”

“Well, yeah, I did, but I thought you would have to get it cleared with your supervisor.”

“Eh, yeah, I had some vacation days saved up, and Janet said it would be fine if I took a few days off. And hey, I decided I would surprise you.”

Brian smiled in amazement as Julie walked around the gigantic suite. Stopping in front of the French doors that led out to the balcony, she stared in awe of the view. “So, what have you been up to, Duckie?”

Smiling, Brian just shrugged. “Not a lot, really. Kev decided we would take a few days off, so I’ve been going out of my mind being bored.”

“Hmmm,” Julie tapped a finger against her chin. “I guess this is your lucky day, then, huh?”

Brian only cocked his head giving her a curious look.

“You know there’s no WAY you can be bored with me here,” she grinned and plopped down on the sofa.

Shaking his head, Brian laughed and sat down beside her fully prepared to not be bored.

---

When the large elevator lurched to a stop, Kevin moved forward and waited for the doors to slide open. Stepping back, he let a younger woman step out before him and surprised himself when he caught himself admiring her. Smiling, he straightened his posture a bit and strode through the casino to the hotel restaurant. It was still early in the day, so thankfully there weren’t too many people around to recognize him. Spotting the woman he’d shared the elevator with, Kevin smiled in her direction. His across-the-room flirting was cut short when a waitress walked up.

“Hi, can I get you anything?” her voice was soft and southern and strangely familiar.

Glancing quickly over the menu, Kevin found something that sounded appetizing and looked up. That’s impossible! He thought as he shut his eyes and opened them again. The waitress wasn’t looking at him, but he couldn’t mistake her if he wanted to. Even with short, light brown hair she was as recognizable as ever.

“Do you need a few minutes?” she asked without looking at him. When he didn’t answer, she finally let her eyes meet his, and the surprise on her face was evident.

“Brianna,” he whispered as he stood up.

Brianna’s eyes grew wide as the realization of the situation completely dawned on her. “Kevin…what are you doing here?”

Finally over the initial shock of seeing her, Kevin regained his composure and narrowed his eyes at her. “I could ask you the same thing.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know what I mean, Bree.”

“Actually, no, I don’t. Look, it was great seeing you, but I really need to get back to work. My shift is actually almost over so I’ll just have another waitress come over. That way you won’t have to wait long,” she said quickly as she tried to get away from Kevin.

“Oh, well, if your shift is almost over, then you could let me see my daughter. I don’t have anything planned for today,” Kevin said blocking Brianna’s path.

“Well, no, I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” she said breezily.

“Why the hell not?”

“She doesn’t know you, Kevin.”

“And whose fucking fault is that? Surely you aren’t blaming me,” he boomed.

“Stop yelling,” Brianna whispered frantically. “Look, I have to go now. I’m sorry.”

Kevin stood there, amazed and furious, watching as Brianna quickly skirted away.

---

AJ, on his way to relax by the pool, smiled at a passing hotel staff member. As soon as he woke up that morning, taking a swim and just lounging by the pool was all he could think about. Well, that and winning some money, but he didn’t want to risk losing any, so he would settle for the more relaxing of the two activities. Letting out a content sigh, he continued on with his trek.

Just as he was making his way through the lobby (the glorious pool in his sight!), he heard angry voices. Curiosity got the best of him and he turned to find a young woman furiously pointing across the counter at a frantic looking man. A big black man was also standing beside the young woman, gently placing a large hand on her shoulder which she promptly pushed away.

“No, don’t tell me to shush or to calm down. This idiot lost my reservation! And on top of that, he booked my room! This is the fucking Bellagio for hell’s sake!”

The large black man pulled the dark haired woman away from the counter and said something that sounded like “You’re causing a scene; people are starting to stare.”

“Let them stare then,” she replied angrily as she turned her back on them.

“M-miss, I’m very sorry about the mix-up and I’d be happy to accommodate you in any way I can,” the man behind the counter blubbered, but she wasn’t listening anymore.

No, now she was staring at AJ with a sarcastic sneer plastered on her pretty face. “Well, if this day hasn’t just fucked me over for the third time today.”

Recognition setting in, AJ rolled his eyes and tried to turn away, but before he could, Bianca was approaching him. Forcing a smile, AJ made a show of bowing in front of her before dropping his shades to the end of his nose. “Bianca, I didn’t recognize you before.”

Bianca rolled her eyes. “I thought you guys were supposed to be in Los Angeles; I saw Nick this morning.”

AJ only shrugged. “We’re taking a few days off.”

She tried to look bored talking to him, but AJ could tell she was uncomfortable. “If I could get into my room, I would be closer to my day off, but that jackass,” she motioned over her shoulder to the man at the front desk, “lost my information and booked my room to someone else.”

“That’s too bad,” AJ commented. “I actually got a great room. Penthouse suite on the 32nd floor.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“No…” he said slowly.

“You have to be fucking kidding me. They gave YOU my suite!”

AJ had to bite his tongue to stifle a laugh. This was actually quite ironic and funny. Of all the people they could have given Bianca’s room to, they gave it to HIM. Could it get any better? “Well, I hope you get everything straightened out,” he offered a wide smile and nodded to Madd Dawg before heading back toward the pool. He didn’t look behind him, but he would have been willing to bet that Bianca was seething. Yes, it could get better.

The sun was beating down on him as he drove through the posh neighborhood, completely at a loss for something to do. Being cooped up in a fancy hotel for four days wasn’t exactly his idea of fun, so he decided to go for a drive. Now, here he was driving with the top down in an expensive “custom rental” with no where to be but here and no one to please but himself. Life was good.

“Who the fuck am I kidding?” Nick grumbled to himself as he signaled and made a left hand turn. “This is just as damn boring as being stuck inside. Driving just isn’t fun by yourself.”

His cynical thoughts were cut short by the ringing of his cell phone. Quickly, he glanced down to see who was calling. Howie. Did he want to answer or not? After the fourth ring, he decided he would or his voicemail would pick up.

“What’s up?”

“Hey, man,” Howie’s voice was cheerful. “What’s goin on?”

“Nothin much, man,” Nick answered as he came to a stop at a red light. “I decided to go driving, but it’s not quite having the effect I thought it would.”

Howie chuckled. “What would that be?”

“Oh, I dunno. Something peaceful or some other equally lame bullshit like that.” That elicited a loud laugh from Howie. “What are you up to?”

“Not a damn thing. Who knew L.A. was this boring?”

“Yeah.”

“Hey, man, you wanna go grab some lunch?” Howie asked brightly.

Nick thought for a second considering whether or not he was really hungry. As if on cue, he felt his stomach rumbled lightly. He laughed to himself. “Sure. Want me to come pick you up?”

“Absolutely! Knowing you, you got some sweet ride that anybody else would be crazy to pay for.”

“You know it! Okay, I’ll be back at the hotel in a few.”

---

AJ stretched out by the pool and closed his eyes, smiling to himself. “Now this is the stuff that I never get tired of,” he mumbled quietly to himself.

“Really?” a soft voice asked quietly. “I thought that would be having your choice of women.”

Opening his eyes, AJ had to squint because of the harsh sun. Standing at the end of his chaise lounge was a tall blonde. At first, he almost didn’t recognize her, but upon closer inspection he realized the woman (and she was damn good looking in his opinion) standing over him, was in fact, his ex. Cassie McKenzie. It was no surprise she was nearly unrecognizable for her once long light blonde hair was now chin length and dark blonde. She was also more tanned and shapely than AJ remembered.

“Well, you’re being quite rude,” she offered a teasing smile as she gracefully stretched out in the chaise lounge beside AJ. “Is this any way to treat an old friend?”

AJ narrowed his eyes at her and smirked. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t aware that we were considered old friends. You’ll have to forgive me.”

“Oh, Alex, come on. What happened between us is in the past. We’ve both grown up since then, right?”

AJ nodded.

“Good,” she gave a satisfied smile.

Looking at her in amazement, AJ had to wonder how she could be so nonchalant around him. While she did have a point, thinking about what she had done to him still made his face burn with humiliation. “Will you excuse me for a minute?”

“Sure,” she smiled again, this time almost seductively.

Getting up, AJ headed back into the hotel headed for his room. Stepping into the elevator, he heard a woman calling for him to hold the doors.

“Thanks,” she said breathlessly without looking up.

“Yeah.”

“Oh, AJ…” she said quietly.

Glancing up, AJ was face to face with Bianca for the second time that day. “Bianca,” he said coolly.

He heard her take a deep breath and saw her turn toward the front of the elevator hesitantly. Suddenly, she turned to him again. “Look, I know things were kind of awkward between us earlier. And—”

“Really?” he interrupted, “I didn’t notice.”

She took an impatient breath. “I just wanted to apologize for causing a scene. I still want us to be friends… like we were…”

AJ rolled his eyes. “That’s a sweet gesture, Bean, but I dunno if that will work.”

“Well, let’s just take things slowly. Let’s go out for dinner tonight. Can we do that? Kind of like starting over,” her voice was soft.

AJ thought for a moment. “Yeah, okay,” he finally conceded.

“Good,” she smiled slightly. “I have a 7:30 reservation at Cili? Is that okay?”

“That’s fine,” AJ answered as the elevator doors opened on his floor. “See you then.” He wasn’t sure why he agreed to go to dinner with Bianca, but for some reason he said yes. Stepping into his suite, AJ found his suitcase and plundered through it until he came up with his iPod. “Maybe she’ll get the hint…” he mumbled to himself and journeyed back to the pool.

---

“So, Duckie, what are you gonna do to entertain me?” Julie asked as she followed him into his bedroom and plopped herself down on his oversized bed.

“Well,” he paused to get his shoes out of his closet, “I was thinking I could cook you dinner here. Of course, I’d have to go get groceries, but that’s okay. Unless you’d rather go out,” he added quickly.

“No,” she laughed. “Dinner here is perfectly fine with me. I’m still a little jet-lagged to be totally honest, so the thought of having to dress up to go to a fancy-schmancy, stuffy old restaurant kinda makes me cringe.”

Brian chuckled. “You are right. Is there anything special that you want?”

Julie thought for a minute before answering. “Actually, I’ve been craving some potato soup lately.”

Brian smiled. Uh oh, he thought. I hope I can pull that off. “Okay, I can do that.” I hope.

“Yay,” she grinned and clapped her hands together excitedly. “This is awesome… I can’t remember the last time a guy cooked for me. And I don’t think you’ve ever cooked for me before you slacker!”

“Well, I will make up for that tonight,” he grinned and slipped his shoes on and stood up.

“Want me to go with you?” Julie questioned.

“Nah… I’ll go. You stay here and get rested up, okay?”

“Sure,” she grinned.

Forty-five minutes later, Brian was all stocked up on ingredients for potato soup and a romantic evening. Smiling to himself, he entered his hotel suite as quietly as possible. It was quiet inside, so after putting the groceries in the kitchen he went to check on Julie. He found her in the same spot he left her—on his bed. Only now she was sleeping. He smiled, not wanting to wake her, but knowing he had to.

“Jules?” he said quietly as he gently shaking her.

She stirred and finally opened her eyes. “Hey.”

“Have a nice nap?”

“Oh god, it’s not morning is it? Did I ruin dinner?”

“No, no… I was just waking you up before I start on dinner. I thought you looked a little stressed and tense, so I booked you for a massage and some other girlie stuff while I make dinner. Is that okay?”

Her eyes went wide. “Is that okay?” she repeated his question. “Heck yes! That is perfectly okay with me.”

Brian grinned and nodded. “Okay. Well, you can go ahead and go. You only have to go downstairs. Mark can show you where to go,” he said referring to his bodyguard.

“Wow,” Julie whispered and placed a kiss on his cheek. “Thanks, Duckie.”

---

“I’m sorry, Mr. Richardson, I can’t give you that information,” a short, pudgy woman with glasses said firmly. Leveling her gaze at Kevin, she frowned.

“Look,” Kevin paused to glance at her nametag, “Rose, I know you are only following company policy, but you don’t understand how important this would be for me.”

“While I do sympathize with you, Mr. Richardson, I’m still not allowed to give out employee information. To anyone.”

Kevin felt his face growing hot with rage and he sucked in a breath to try and calm himself. “Well, can you tell me when her next shift is?”

“Mr. Richardson, I think you need to be going now. I would hate to have to call security,” Rose said as politely as possible.

“Damn it,” he yelled and slammed his fist down on the marble counter top. “I’m not asking for fucking money or any shit like that. All I want to know is where I can find Brianna Chambers. Or, hell, I dunno, her fucking schedule?”

Startled by his outburst, Rose narrowed her eyes. “I’m quite aware that you are use to getting everything you ask for because of who you are, but that is not going to happen today. And if you have another tantrum I will have no choice but call someone to escort you out of here.”

“Un-fucking-believable!” he roared again, this time sending a vase of flowers flying off the end of the counter.

Rose quickly jumped to her feet and grabbed the phone off its cradle, but just as she was talking to someone to get a guard to come and take care of the situation, Kevin stormed toward the elevator.

When the elevator doors opened, Kevin ran into AJ.

“Dude, why do you look so mad?” AJ quickly spun around expecting Kevin to stop and talk.

“Fuck off,” he growled darkly and stepped into the elevator ignoring the astonished expression on AJ’s face.

“I didn’t think you were coming back,” Cassie’s voice sliced into AJ’s thoughts quite suddenly. Where had she come from?

“I just had to get something,” he answered while trying not to look at her. That, however, was proving to be harder than he expected.

“Oh.”

Concentrating on his iPod was becoming harder to do when he realized Cassie was lying on her side staring at him. Focus, McLean, he told himself.

“So, J, are you up for some catching up time?” Cassie asked casually with an almost seductive smile.

“Catching up time?” AJ repeated, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

“Yeah. You know… it’s been so long since we’ve seen one another and I just thought it might be nice to go somewhere and talk. Privately,” her smiled was enchanting as she leaned over and placed her hand on his forearm. “What do you say?”

“Well,” he hesitated unsure whether he wanted to open that can of worms or not. He decided to answer truthfully, “I really don’t know if that’s such a good idea, Cassie.”

“Fair enough,” she said with a short nod as she stood up and turned to walk away. Before she got more than a few feet away, she turned around and smiled. “For the record, I’m not trying to set you up for anything. I just thought it might be nice to talk.”

AJ watched as she turned back around and sauntered away. Her last comment fluttered back into his mind and before he could stop himself, he was on his feet going after her. “Cassie,” he called just as she was almost inside the hotel.

“Yeah?” she asked.

“You know, you’re right, we haven’t seen each other in a while and it would be nice to talk.”

A slow smile spread across Cassie’s pretty face. “So are you up for dinner tonight? 7:30 sound okay?”

“Sure,” he nodded and returned her smile, the plans he’d already made completely slipping from his mind.

---

Resting her head on her left hand, Bianca impatiently drummed her fingernails on the table. AJ had planned to meet her at Cili at 7:30 and it was nearing 8. She was sure she looked quite pathetic sitting by herself; it had to be obvious she was waiting for someone that wasn’t going to show up. With a sigh she checked her watch again to see that only three minutes had passed. Pathetic.

“Can I bring you and appetizer?” the waiter appeared and seemed to be giving her a most sympathetic gaze.

“No thank you, I think I’ll just be going,” she answered and placed some money in his hand.

“You ready to leave now?” Madd Dawg questioned as she walked quickly past.

“Yeah, you just wanna hit McDonald’s or something?”

“Whatever you want,” he said simply. Once inside the car he turned to look at Bianca, “Are you okay?”

“Peachy.”

“Maybe something came up,” Madd Dawg knew it wasn’t the best thing to say to try and make her feel better, but he was willing to give AJ the benefit of the doubt. “Things happen.”

“Sure. But we’re also talking about AJ and he has a tendency to do some things out of spite.”

“You don’t—”

“He stood me up,” Bianca tried her best to sound nonchalant and act as though she didn’t care. But the truth was that she DID care and it had hurt her to be treated like this. Of course, part of her couldn’t blame AJ at all, but still, she thought maybe they were past petty bickering and childish actions. She wanted to move past the tension and try and get back to where they had been before everything that happened in New York a year earlier.

“Look, I know you don’t want to hear this, but AJ is still really hurt. When a man’s ego is bruised as badly as his was, he will take extreme measures to pick himself back up. And I’m not taking his side, I’m just trying to let you know why he might have done this even though that doesn’t make it right,” he placed his hand gently over hers, “Just give things a little more time, I’m sure everything will get back to normal.”

Bianca smiled through tear filled eyes. Somehow Madd Dawg always knew what to say to make her feel better. He may have been her bodyguard, but right now, he was the best friend she had.

---

“Oh, I haven’t laughed this much in a while,” Cassie giggled holding her stomach. Grinning, she playfully shoved AJ and kept walking toward the hotel.

“Me neither,” he laughed along with her. “I had fun tonight.”

“Me too. I’m glad you decided to come with me.” An awkward silence settled between them as they neared the Bellagio entrance. “Well, Mr. Man Whore,” she laughed and traced a finger across the words on his black t-shirt, “I’m a little tired so I’m gonna go up to bed. See you tomorrow?”

“Okay,” he nodded and smiled.

“Good,” Cassie leaned forward and softly placed a kiss at the corner of his mouth. “Night.”

As Cassie disappeared inside the hotel AJ checked his watch. 11:25. He wasn’t really feeling tired at all because he had relaxed most of the day and he didn’t want to go back to his suite yet. “I wonder if I can watch the fountains this late?” He hadn’t even thought about watching the fountains and didn’t know when the show times were or when they ended, but it was worth checking out. To his good fortune, a fountain show was just beginning.

He was relieved to see that there weren’t many people standing and watching the fountains this time of night. There was a young couple (probably newlyweds) standing close together and occasionally leaning in for a soft kiss. The only other person he saw was a young woman who didn’t really seem to be watching the fountains. Walking up to the rail, AJ leaned over on it and cast a quick glance at the woman. His closer look told him that the woman was crying (only leaning over to make it less obvious) because he could see her just barely see her shoulders shaking. Every now and then she would reach up and brush a stray hair out of her face as she wiped her eyes. He felt like he might have been intruding, but seeing her so upset bothered him. What if something terrible happened and she needed someone—albeit a complete stranger—to talk to.

Stepping closer, AJ leaned in and whispered, “Are you all right?” He was taken completely by surprise when the woman turned sharply and he saw that it was Bianca. She had indeed been crying, her eyes were red and puffy and tearstains were prominent on her cheeks. “Bean, what’s wrong?”

She quickly wiped her face even though she knew it was no use. “Nothing.”

He narrowed his eyes and took a step closer. “I’m not buying that. Now what’s the matter?”

“You know, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t patronize me AJ. You don’t have to stand here and pretend like you care why I’m upset,” her tone was harsh and she turned to walk away but he stopped her.

Taking her arm in his hand he shook his head furiously. “Don’t even try and make me look like a bad guy for no reason, Bianca.”

She jerked her arm from his grip and narrowed her eyes. “Look, I said I’m okay now if you’ll excuse me…”

“No!” he took her arm once again. This time his voice was urgent, “Did something happen? You’d tell me, wouldn’t you?”

Bianca’s gaze softened for a moment at the sincerity in his voice, but she quickly pushed away her feelings of forgiveness. “No, AJ, nothing happened.” A blanket of silence fell over them and they both just stood staring at the beautiful fountains. It was minutes later before either of them spoke again. “You know, I really thought we were past our harsh feelings,” she finally offered quietly.

“What are you talking about?”

“AJ, you know what I’m talking about. This childish desire to get back at me for what happened… I thought it was gone and we were gonna be able to move on. I guess I was wrong because you obviously had an urge to humiliate me tonight.”

AJ started to question what she was talking about when he suddenly remembered his promise to her earlier in the elevator. He had planned on meeting her for a 7:30 dinner, but then he’d made plans with Cassie and completely forgot. “Oh god, Bean, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“I really didn’t mean to stand you up. I met up with… with an old friend and forgot. I swear, just because I’ve been upset with you that doesn’t mean I would just not meet you somewhere I said I would.” She only nodded. “I’m serious, Bean. I just wasn’t thinking.”

“It’s okay,” she whispered softly. “I guess I’m just being stupid and blowing this all out of proportion.”

“I really am sorry,” he said sincerely. “Can I make it up to you?”

“I guess,” she nodded and felt him take her hand.

“Okay,” he smiled. “How about breakfast?”

Julie walked out of the elevator and proceeded toward the suite she was sharing with Brian for the next few days. Glancing over at Brian’s bodyguard, Mark, she smiled. “So, how long have you been working for Brian?”

“About a year and a half,” Mark said simply as the turned the corner that led to the end of the hall where Brian’s room was.

“Oh, okay,” she tried to think of something else to say, but before anything came to her mind, they were at the end of the hall and Mark was slipping his card key into the slot. Smiling again, she mumbled a quick ‘thank you’ and stepped inside the dimly lit suite. She stopped right inside the doorway and listened. There was soft music playing—most likely Brian McKnight or Boyz II Men—and she could hear Brian softly singing along with the lyrics. As quietly as possible, Julie tiptoed to the end of the hall and leaned her head against the doorframe, smiling at what she saw.

Brian stood over the table in the dining area of the suite arranging a vase of flowers. There were candles strategically placed all around the room and here and there she could see more flowers that were left out of the arrangement. The table had been set and Brian kept checking his watch, expecting her to be back any second. Standing up a little straighter, Julie walked into the dinning room and grinned.

“Well, hello,” Brian broke into a wide grin and pulled a chair out from the table motioning for her to have a seat. “I was beginning to wonder if you’d gotten lost.”

Julie looked up at Brian and found herself lost in him for a second. The candlelight was flickering brightly and she found herself gazing at him in a way she never had before. Shaking her head slightly, Julie forced her thoughts out of her mind and smiled up at him. “Everything looks great.”

“I hope it is as good as it looks,” Brian said with a wink. “Here you are madam.”

She watched as he placed a bowl of homemade potato soup down on the table in front of her then went on to pour her a glass of wine. “Wow, Brian, you’ve really outdone yourself.”

“Wait till after dinner and if we’re both still living, then you can praise me,” he joked playfully.

---

Bianca looked down at her half empty coffee cup and ran her finger slowly around the rim. She glanced across the table at AJ to find him staring back at her, his head cocked to the side and his arms folded atop the table. “What?” she asked feeling a little insecure.

“Nothing,” he shrugged.

“Thank you for breakfast,” Bianca mumbled for lack of anything else to say. She felt like she should be trying to keep the conversation going, but she was having a hard time thinking of things that weren’t uncomfortable to talk about with AJ.

“You don’t need to thank me,” he said before lifting his coffee cup to his lips.

After a few minutes, Bianca looked back at AJ who was now staring down into his plate pushing the half eaten food around with his fork. She opened her mouth to say something, but immediately stopped herself.

“What’s on your mind?” Though he was no longer looking directly at her, AJ was paying very close attention to Bianca.

“I…um…” she took a breath and tried to force the question out. “Do you wish it had turned out differently?”

He didn’t need to ask what she meant; he knew she was talking about them. He could have made the situation hard for Bianca, but he didn’t. The answer to that question was as evident as the blood flowing through his veins. “Yes.”

Lowering her head, she tried to discreetly reach up and wipe her eyes. She felt so stupid crying about something that was entirely her fault and could have been different. If it wasn’t for me, it WOULD be different. She was startled suddenly when AJ slid into the booth beside her and tipped her face toward his.

“Did you know that I think about you every day?” his expression was serious yet his eyes were tender. His fingers were still under her chin and his thumb was gently gliding across her cheek catching the tears that were still falling from her pained blue eyes.

At his question, Bianca closed her eyes and leaned into his soft hand, gently nuzzling against his warm palm. She couldn’t find the right words to say to answer that question. But before she could say anything, he followed his question with another.

“Marry me?”

Her eyes flew open and found a completely sincere look in AJ’s soulful brown eyes. She searched his face for any sign of playfulness, but knew instantly he was completely serious. A million thoughts suddenly filled her mind as she tried to find the right answer to give him. Let him down easy? Laugh as if though was a joke? However, before she could form a complete answer in her mind, she heard herself say, “Yes,” and watched as a slow smile crossed AJ’s face and he slowly brought his lips to hers.

---

Nick sighed to himself and threw himself over then arm of an overstuffed chair in the sitting area of his room. He picked up the remote control and started channel surfing for lack of anything better to do. Here he was, supposedly having a relaxing weekend away from the guys, and he was alone in his room bored out of his mind. He’d hung out with Howie for the better part of the afternoon and while they were at lunch, he’d had the pleasure—well, scratch that, he wouldn’t really call it a pleasure—of meeting Howie’s current girlfriend Mia Dennison.

It wasn’t that she was a stuck up bitch, she was as nice as she could be. He would never tell Howie, but there was just something about her that Nick didn’t really like. He just couldn’t put his finger on it. He’d had a hard time keeping conversation going at lunch so he finally decided that he’d stick strictly to eating. And he had to admit that he was thankful when she’d declined Howie’s offer to come with them after lunch, opting instead to just meet up with Howie later for dinner.

Now, here he was alone with nothing to do but watch television. Brian had a friend visiting so Nick knew that he wouldn’t feel like hanging out, he’d already been hanging out with Howie, and Kevin wasn’t even in town. Glancing around the messy suite, Nick frowned to himself. When had his life gotten so boring?

“Hell, I think I’d even go to Vegas and get married just to have something to do,” he mumbled to himself as he resumed his task.

---

“Okay, I think it’s safe to say that you really have outdone yourself tonight, Duckie,” Julie leaned back in her chair and placed a hand on her full belly. “That was great. Not as good as my Mom’s,” she paused to wink, “but you have great potential young Padawan.”

Brian burst out laughing at Julie’s Star Wars reference and bowed his head slightly. “Why thank you Master Yoda…”

She only grinned. “So, Duckster, what do you have planned for the rest of the night?”

“I dunno,” he shrugged. It was still early, but he hadn’t really planned past dinner. He had been hoping that dinner would be romantic, and while the setting had been romantic, the dinner itself hadn’t really been. Not because he hadn’t tried, but when it came down to it, he was clueless about how to be romantic with Julie. He racked his brain trying to think of something they could do. Go swimming? No, he didn’t really feel like going down to the pool only to be recognized by younger fans that were bound to be there. Leave the hotel and go shopping? No, again, he would be faced with being recognized and that wasn’t something he felt like dealing with at the present moment.

“Hey, what do you think about going down to see the fountains out front? I only saw them for a minute before I came up,” she suggested with a smile. “I know it’s not the same as the Bellagio, but we could always pretend.”

Brian laughed and nodded. That did sound like a good idea; it definitely had the potential to be romantic. “Great idea, Jules.”

A few minutes later they were standing together in front of the fountains. She was right, it was nothing like the Bellagio, but there was something about it nonetheless. Glancing to his right, he looked at Julie taking in her soft features. She reached up and tucked a strand of her sandy blonde hair behind her ear and glanced back at Brian, suddenly looking rather insecure.

“What’s wrong? Do I have something on my face?” she asked quickly.

Brian laughed and looked down at his feet, shaking his head no. When he looked back up, Julie was still casting a wary glance at him. Finally, she turned her attention back to the fountains, but after a minute he saw her reach up and lightly brush her hand across her cheek. Leaning forward on the rail, Brian felt a few drops of rain splash onto his cheeks. “Hey, Jules, it’s starting to rain. You think—” he stopped to look at her again and he saw she was leaning her head back, a wide grin on her face.

“God, I love the rain,” she grinned at him when the drops started to come down harder. She suddenly took his hand and pulled him away from the rail. “Don’t you? It can’t get any better than this.”

Brian let her drag him away from the fountains and they stood getting drenched in the unexpected downpour. He couldn’t think of anything to say as he looked at her. Something inside him clicked and after a moment, he tenderly took her face in his hands and placed his lips on hers. It took a moment, but Brian finally felt Julie respond to the kiss.

This could be it, I think I'm in love
It's love this time
It just seems to fit, I think I'm in love
This love is mine

I can see you with me when I'm older
All my lonely nights are finally over
You took the weight of the world off my
shoulders (the world just goes away)

Oh, when you kiss me

I know you miss me
and when you're with me
The world just goes away
The way you hold me
The way you show me that you
adore me--oh, when you kiss me
Oh, yeah*

Lost completely in the moment, everything around them seemed to fade away. Brian’s kisses were feather soft on Julie’s lips and his hands became entangled in her wet locks of hair. Brian wanted nothing more than to have the moment go on and on, but he knew eventually it would have to end. And when it finally did, he still held her face in his hands and stared into her eyes as the rain continued to fall down on them.



*“When You Kiss Me” by Shania Twain

“Your little friend Nick was rather quiet at lunch yesterday,” Mia Dennison said between sips of her orange juice.

Howie only nodded. “He can be shy sometimes. But don’t let him hear you call him little,” he joked. They hadn’t had a chance to have dinner together the night before because something came up and Mia couldn’t make it, so they decided to have a nice quite breakfast together. “He just needs to get to know you a little better; all the guys are looking forward to meeting you.”

Mia smiled and placed her hand on Howie’s cheek. “Well, I’m looking forward to meeting them, too. With the way you speak of them, they all seem wonderful.”

“You could meet them Monday if you want,” Howie suggested before taking a bite of his omelet.

“Actually, that will have to wait,” she said quickly, lifting the linen napkin from her lap to dab her full, pink lips. “I’m going out of town on business Monday morning. Batting her eyelashes, she pouted a little, “I’m sorry sweetie I wish I could meet them.”

“That’s all right, baby,” Howie said as he leaned over to place a kiss on her cheek. “You can meet them later.”

---

Kevin slowly walked out of the elevator and bypassed his room heading straight for AJ’s. He’d been out on the town most of the night just going from casino to casino having nothing better to do. After he had successfully gambled away all of the cash he’d been carrying, he found an 24 hour ATM then proceeded to get rip roaring drunk and get into a fight with some huge man that didn’t give a rat’s ass that he was a celebrity. So far this getaway had not gone as planned and he thought it would just be best if they got a flight out this afternoon instead of Sunday.

Leaning against the door, he knocked twice and waited to see if he could hear movement from the inside. After a few minutes, he gave up grumbling to himself that AJ was probably already down by the pool or doing something equally relaxing. He stifled a yawn and reached into his back pocket for the key to his room. The elevator opened at the end of the hall, but he didn’t give it a second thought; he knew it wouldn’t be AJ coming back upstairs.

“Kevin?” a reluctant female voice called out behind him.

He groaned inwardly and lightly banged his head against the door. How the hell did a fan get up here? Plastering on what he hoped was a genuine looking smile Kevin sucked in a deep breath and turned around to face the woman. “What can I do for you? Bree?”

“I just wanted to come by and give you this,” she told him stiffly and placed a scrapbook in his hands. “I’m leaving town for a while and I thought you might want it.”

Tears sprang to his eyes when he opened the book and started flipping through the pages. It was full of pictures of his daughter from the past year. Suddenly very angry he looked at Brianna with disbelief. “You’re leaving town, huh? Doing what you do best then.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know damn well what that means, Brianna. You’re running. Again.”

“I am not running,” she turned defensive as she crossed her arms over her chest and looked at her feet. “I just have things I need to do.”

“Well, you know what, Bree? I’m not gonna make you let me see Kyra right now because eventually, your guilt will catch up with you. But don’t come running to me when your little boy toys leave you hanging because I don’t ever want to see you again. Not unless you’re bringing my daughter to me.”

Brianna stood watching Kevin with tears brimming in her eyes. When she didn’t say anything, Kevin stepped inside his room and slammed the door shut.

---

AJ’s eyes slowly fluttered open. A smile formed on his lips as the night before came flooding back to him; the smile grew wider when he took a moment to realize that Bianca was still asleep in his arms. Brushing her long, dark hair off her shoulder, he gently leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on the newly exposed skin. Just thinking about her made his heart swell and waking up with her in his arms made it nearly burst out of his chest. And now, she was his wife. “My wife,” he repeated softly to himself. God, it sounded perfect to him. Bianca mumbled something in her sleep and rolled over in his arms. Staring down at her peaceful face, AJ was overwhelmed by the need to kiss her. Gently as could be, he slowly lowered his face to hers and captured her lips in his. It was a moment before he realized Bianca was now wide awake and returning his kiss.

“Morning,” he finally said as he swept her hair off her forehead and placed another gentle kiss on her lips.

“Now I could get used to waking up like that,” she smiled and ran a hand through his short hair. And she wasn’t just saying that to make him feel good, she genuinely meant it. Something about waking up warm in his arms with his lips softly gliding against her own just felt… right. She hadn’t woken up this happy in quite a while.

“Well, you’d better get used to it, cause I plan on waking you up like this as much as possible,” his brown eyes sparkled.

Their moment was broken too suddenly by the phone. AJ reached over and lifted the receiver and was greeted by Kevin’s loud voice. He sounded pissed and AJ had to hold the phone away from his ear until the yelling came to a stop. “You done?”

“You had a great idea coming to Vegas, pal. I’ve really had a wonderful time,” Kevin replied sarcastically.

“I take it you haven’t had a good time?”

Even through the phone Kevin could hear AJ smirking and it pissed him off even more. “Damn it AJ, no, I haven’t had a good time. I was just calling to let you know that we’ve got a flight back to LA at 3:30.”

“Fine. But I think you might need to get one more seat reserved on that flight.”

“Who the hell for?” Kevin’s patience was growing thin. He just wanted to get packed and leave as soon as possible.

“For my wife,” AJ told him simply and hung up. “Looks like we need to pack.”

“What for?” Bianca gave him a quizzical glance.

“Mr. Richardson apparently booked an early flight back to LA,” he slid from beneath the covers and began searching for his boxers.

“Oh, well, I can’t go back today baby. I’ve got a full schedule and I’m not free for another day or so.”

AJ slipped a t-shirt over his head and nodded. “Okay, I forgot about that. Will you come back to LA when you finish?”

“Absolutely,” she grinned and wrapped the sheet around her body before standing up and walking over to him. Leaning against him, she sighed and wrapped her arms around his waist. She lowered her voice to a soft whisper. “I love you.”

“Ditto,” AJ smiled and placed his chin atop her head. “Oh, I guess I need to call Kevin. He probably already added the extra reservation on the flight so he’s gonna be pissed. God, what a great way to start off my day.”

Bianca just laughed and kissed his neck before going to find her clothes and shower.

---

Julie quietly slipped out of Brian’s arms as he slept, praying she wouldn’t wake him up. She felt so guilty about what she was going to do, but she didn’t really feel like she had a choice. She couldn’t help but feel like she and Brian made a huge mistake the night before and she wanted to avoid an awkward morning by getting out of there before he had a chance to wake up. Making sure she had everything she came with, she stopped at the table by the door where she was sure to find a pen and pad of paper. She found what she needed and quickly jotted a short note, placing it somewhere Brian would easily find it, and left the suite. The cab would be there by the time she got downstairs.

Brian, a smile playing on his lips, was just waking up as the cab pulled away from the hotel. Rolling over, he reached out to pull Julie closer and found her side of the bed was empty. Sitting up, he listened for the shower. Nothing. “She’s probably fixing herself some breakfast.” He stood up to stretch and looked around the room. Something didn’t look right about it. Running a hand through his messy curls, he began to realize that Julie’s stuff was gone. Everything she’d brought with her was nowhere to be seen.

Just to be sure he was right, Brian walked into the bathroom. After all, she could have been taking a bath instead of a shower. To his dismay he found nothing at all. The kitchen was next on his list, but it was the same scenario. It was almost like she had never been there at all. Like their dinner together followed by a night of lovemaking was nothing more than a dream. He threw himself down on the sofa and rubbed his hands over his face. Glancing up, he saw a note taped to the television and he leaned forward over the coffee table to retrieve it.

Duckie,

I’m really sorry I just left the way I did. Please don’t be upset with me. I just felt like I had overstayed my welcome and it was time for me to go home. I’ll call you later.

Jules

That was it. No mention of their time together and nothing that indicated whether or not she’d had a good time. She just had to go. He let out a heavy sigh and looked at his watch. 8:23. When did she leave? It couldn’t have been too long ago, could it? “I wonder…” he trailed off as thoughts raced through his mind. Could he catch her at the airport? “I have to at least try!” he jumped up and ran to the door. “Mark, I need to get to LAX… Let me go put some jeans and shoes on and meet me downstairs with a car, okay?”

Half an hour later, Brian found himself running through the crowds in the airport followed closely by Mark. He was just praying that her flight hadn’t taken off yet. He saw the departure gate just ahead of him and sped up considerably, leaving Mark behind in the sea of people. When he reached the counter, he was out of breath and the woman just stood there looking at him strangely. “Can you… please… tell me… if flight… flight… 700 to… Or…Orlando has… left yet?” Doubled over with his hands on his knees, Brian glanced up and gave the woman a hopeful look.

“I’m sorry sir, the flight left ten minutes ago.”

Brian closed his eyes and tried to subdue the prickling sensation he felt at the corners. Pinching the bridge of his nose he mumbled a thanks and turned to find Mark standing there looking sorry for him. “Let’s go,” he said simply and walked past the people that were now waiting in a line behind him.

---

*Monday Morning*

“Morning everybody,” Kevin’s tone was even as he poured himself a cup of coffee. “Good weekend?”

“Sure,” Brian’s tone matched Kevin’s as he flipped idly through a magazine.

“Where’s AJ?” Howie asked sliding his mug in Kevin’s direction.

“No idea,” he answered.

“Well, while we’re waiting on him, I’m gonna watch some TV,” Nick said and jumped over the back of the sofa on the other side of the room. Surfing through the channels, he stopped at MTV seeing the new Jennifer Lopez video. “Damn, her ass gets bigger every time I see her.” After a minute or so, the video ended and it cut to one of the news. “And we have some news on everyone’s favorite pop diva… Apparently Bianca Parker has tied—” At the mention of her name, Nick immediately began flipping through the channels again.

Kevin watched him closely, gauging his reaction. He knew what the VJ had been about to say, but he didn’t know how Nick would take it when he finally found out. Kevin looked to his left when he felt an elbow sharply nudge into his ribs. Howie and Brian were staring wide-eyed at him.

“That sounded like they were about to announce Bianca got married or something,” Brian whispered.

“How do you think Nick would handle that?” Howie lowered his voice as well.

“I don’t think he’d take it well.”

“No, he won’t,” Kevin answered shaking his head. “Especially when he finds out who she married.”

“Oh God.”

“Who?” Brian questioned eagerly before taking a sip of his coffee.

“AJ.”

In that very instant, the coffee that had been in Brian’s mouth was now all over Kevin’s unhappy looking face. He was hacking and coughing, trying to get air into his lungs, but between hot coffee and utter shock, he was having a hard time. Howie finally started patting him on the back to help Brian compose himself.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Nick asked as he picked up a bagel.

“Nothing,” Brian whispered, still sounding strangled.

Just then, AJ walked through the door grinning like a complete idiot. “Hey.” Kevin, Brian and Howie mumbled a quiet hello as they averted their eyes from AJ while Nick just acted as though he wasn’t there. “What’s up?”

“Nothin’,” they all answered in the same demeanor.

AJ raised his eyebrows just shrugged. “Well, are y’all ready to get to work?”

“Sure,” the three answered again.

“What the hell is wrong with you three?” Nick questioned obviously annoyed.

One of their producers came in before anyone could answer. “You five wanna get this show on the road?”

“Yes, please,” Nick spoke quickly.

“Oh, by the way congratulations AJ,” the man said with a smile.

“On what? Getting here on time for once?” Nick cracked sarcastically. He missed the looks that were passed between Kevin, Brian and Howie.

“Well, that is a feat in itself, but nah, I was talking about his wedding this weekend.”

“Oh God,” Brian moaned under his breath. Kevin and Howie just sat stock still waiting for the shit to hit the fan.

“Thanks man,” AJ grinned and shook his hand.

“Wait, you went to Vegas and got married?” Nick seemed highly amused.

“Yeah.”

“Who’s the poor girl? Someone you picked up by the pool? Or did you find her in a casino?”

“Actually, she was staying in the same hotel as Kev and me,” AJ told him flatly.

“Oh God,” Brian groaned again. This was going to be bad… maybe they should take cover under the table or something.

“Hope you got her good and drunk,” Nick sneered.

AJ turned to face Nick tired of his pissy attitude and snide remarks. “You actually might know her.”

“Really? Highly doubtful if you found her in some hotel in Vegas, but try me.”

“Oh God,” this time Kevin and Howie joined in.

“Her name’s Bianca,” AJ stated matter-of-factly.

Nick just looked at him for a minute before the answer hit him. “You’re kidding me, right? You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” He turned to the other three with clenched fists and ragged breathing. “Is he fucking for real?” They all stood up and walked toward Nick, but he only took two steps back. “He’s serious?!”

Kevin, Howie and Brian could only nod.

“You fucking bastard,” Nick screamed as he took a swing at AJ’s jaw.

AJ, however, was anticipating this and ducked, instead sending Nick’s hand into the wall. Obscenities came pouring from Nick’s mouth and AJ threw him hard against the wall. “You have no right to be pissed at me over this. YOU pushed her toward me the first time… but this time we found our way back to each other. And there isn’t a damn thing you can do to change that, you understand me? If you really did love her, you would’ve tried harder.”

“Who are you to fucking tell me I didn’t try? You don’t know the first thing about me,” Nick cried as tears clung to his eyelashes. Shoving as hard as he could, he watched as AJ stumbled back and fell on the floor. “None of you know me anymore.”

“Wait, Nick, don’t leave mad,” Brian started after him, but stopped when Nick turned on him.

Pointing at all of them he took a deep breath and tried to compose himself before going outside. “I don’t want to see any of you, so don’t follow me.”

“When are you coming back, Nick? We have a schedule to follow,” Kevin said sternly, reminding him that they still had work to do.

“Fuck the schedule I have a better idea. How about we just call all this shit off. Then the four of us would all get to go home and be happy while AJ gets to be with Bianca. That way everybody wins,” he smirked hatefully and left them all standing there looking shocked.

Kevin, Howie, AJ and Brian all sat around the quite studio exchanging worried glances. It had been three hours since Nick stormed out and he hadn’t called them or anyone else that they had contacted, but they also hadn’t heard any reports of a Backstreet Boy gone mad on the news. That had to be good, right?

“Maybe I should go look for him,” Brian suggested leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees. Squeezing his eyes shut he let out a long breath and looked back at the others, “One of us should don’t you think?”

“Where would we start looking?” Howie’s brown eyes were filled with concern.

“He could be anywhere by now.” They all turned to look at AJ and they knew he was right. He shrugged and leaned back against the cushions of the sofa, “But I bet he’s back at the hotel, lying on the bed just staring at the ceiling. Or playing a game. I doubt he left LA.”

“I dunno Jay,” Brian’s voice was doubtful, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him like that before. He’s really hurt and angry and I think—”

“Look, I know that he’s pissed at me, but I don’t want you to think that I did any of this to get back at Nick. As much as he pisses me off, I would never intentionally hurt him. But I love Bianca. There’s nothing I can do to change the way I feel about her and I don’t think we made a mistake by getting married.”

“AJ, we know how you feel about Bianca,” Howie quickly replied before anyone had the chance. “You don’t have to explain what you did or why and we aren’t blaming you for any of this, so you don’t have to feel like you should explain yourself to us.”

“Howie’s right,” Kevin spoke for the first time. “I think Nick just needs some time to calm down and then maybe you two can sit down and have a civil conversation about all of this.”

“Sure and pigs will fly out of your ass,” AJ mumbled under his breath.

“Come on guys, let’s get going. Nick is obviously not going to come back here so there’s no reason for us to stay,” Kevin said ignoring AJ’s comment all together.

---

“You did what??”

Bianca jerked the phone away from her ear at the sound of Holly’s shrill voice, “Do you think you could be a little less ear splitting, Holly? I said AJ and I got married over the weekend.”

“I cannot believe you just up and got married!” Holly’s voice was dramatic.

“Well, it’s not like we planned a huge ceremony. I mean, we just decided to do it on a whim,” Bianca felt herself sigh. Checking to see if she could switch lanes, she quickly did so and focused her attention back on the road in front of her. “It was something that just kinda… happened. I can’t even explain it, Holly, but I don’t regret it for one minute.” Glancing down at the plain gold band shining on her slender finger, Bianca smiled widely. She still couldn’t believe it.

“Well, you know I love AJ to death and all,” Holly began sounding a little nervous.

“But?” Bianca asked expectantly.

“But do you really think it was a good idea to just up and get married after being apart for almost a year? And Bean, let’s be honest don’t you remember why you didn’t work out the first time?”

Bianca was growing angry at where the conversation was headed. “Why don’t you tell me what’s really on your mind, Holly.”

“Okay, well… what I’m getting at is… well, do you think you’re really ready for this? I mean, the reason it didn’t work out in the first place was because you weren’t entirely over Nick. And Bianca, you never really went through that grieving process.”

Bianca drove in a stunned silence trying to let her friend’s words sink in. Finally, she was able to find her voice. “I didn’t need to grieve, Holly. I’m over Nick, okay? If I had known you felt this way, I wouldn’t have bothered to tell you about it.”

“Wait, Bean, you’re taking this the wrong way. I don’t mean that I’m not happy for you and AJ, it’s just that—”

She quickly interrupted Holly, “Look, I’ve gotta go. Driving in Los Angeles isn’t easy, add talking on a cell phone to the equation and you’ve got one dangerous mixture,” Bianca tried to sound chipper.

“Just wait a second Bianca,” Holly said.

Bianca cut her off again. “Bye.” Flipping her cell phone closed, Bianca tossed it into the back seat of her rental car and pushed her sunglasses a little further up on her nose.

I AM over him, she thought with a huff and pressed the gas pedal down further. The California sun was lowering quickly in the sky and she didn’t have much time to get where she needed to be.

---

“You’re sure she won’t be here until 7?”

“Positive, man.”

“Good. Then I have some time to elaborate a little,” he grinned.

---

Kevin stopped outside his hotel room when he saw a note was taped to his door. Not Brianna again, he thought heavily. He didn’t know how much more he could handle today. With the group falling apart and his heart shattered into a thousand pieces, he thought this might be the straw that would break the camel’s back. Not giving the folded paper a second thought, he ripped it from the door and slipped his key into the lock and let himself into the dark room. Tossing the room key along with the wadded paper onto the table by the sofa, he kept walking toward his bedroom. He needed a hot shower and maybe a stiff drink.

Half an hour later, Kevin emerged from his bathroom in a cloud of steam feeling much better than he had earlier. He had finally decided against turning to alcohol for comfort because he knew all too well that it wouldn’t do any good. Instead he sat in an overstuffed chair and propped his feet on the table positioned between the sofa and the television. Rubbing his tired eyes, he made a quick survey of the room; the wad of paper caught his eye more than once. The more he sat in the chair, the more the mystery note seemed to daunt him. He could almost hear it saying, “C’mon Kev, you know you’re dying to read me…”

Finally, feeling as if he might go crazy if he didn’t find out what was scribbled on the paper, Kevin stood up and snatched the ball of paper from the table. Upon opening the note, he didn’t recognize the handwriting. It definitely wasn’t Brianna’s and he didn’t know who might have left this taped to his door. Maybe the person who left it, made a mistake? Closer inspection once again proved him wrong, it was definitely addressed to him: Mr. Kevin Scott Richardson. Realizing that he could not stall any longer, Kevin began to slowly read over the words that were neatly written on the page:

Mr. Kevin Scott Richardson,

I’ve been trying to track you down for some time now, but you are quite an elusive man. That mystery was something that definitely attracted me to you the first time we met a few years back. I know you must be wondering why I’m leaving this letter now, but I’ve realized that I should have left it long ago. I would much rather discuss the matter in person if you don’t mind. If you don’t, please meet me at the address below at 8:30 tonight. If not, I can’t say that I blame you. Hope to see you soon.

Tara Wellman

Reading over the address penned in the same cursive handwriting, he only had one question floating through his mind. Who the hell is Tara Wellman?

---

Bianca entered the revolving glass doors of the recording studio in a hurry. She was going to be late if she didn’t hurry. She took the elevator to the fourth floor then made her way down the long corridor taking a left at the end of the hall. Just as she was nearing the studio, she could hear the faint sounds of a beautiful song playing. Stepping into the doorway of the studio, the song got louder.

When all our tears have reached the sea
Part of you will live in me
Way down deep inside my heart
The days keep coming without fail
A new wind is gonna find your sail
That's where your journey starts

You'll find better love
Strong as it ever was
Deep as the river runs
Warm as the morning sun
Please remember me

Looking around, she spotted a figure sitting stooped over in a chair. Their body was shaking with unrelenting sobs, but Bianca could just make out the sound of their voice mixing with the voice on the radio. It was such a heart wrenching sight…

Just like the waves down by the shore
We're gonna keep on coming back for more
'Cause we don't ever wanna stop
Out in this brave new world you seek
Oh the valleys and the peaks
And I can see you on the top

You'll find better love
Strong as it ever was
Deep as the river runs
Warm as the morning sun
Please remember me

She watched as the figure, obviously a man, raked a hand through his hair and took a breath. He’d clearly been through something awful and needed comforting, but Bianca knew she wasn’t meant to be here. Though this person was hurting, she felt like an intruder to a very private moment. The lyrics were enough to tell her that. But still… she couldn’t make herself leave.

Remember me when you're out walkin'
When the snow falls high outside your door
Late at night when you're not sleepin'
And moonlight falls across your floor
When I can't hurt you anymore

You'll find better love
Strong as it ever was
Deep as the river runs
Warm as the morning sun
Please remember me
Please remember me*

She took a quiet step inside the door and waited to see if he would realize someone was there with him. She could hear him weeping more clearly now, and he was almost familiar to her though she still couldn’t see his face because of the darkness and his posture. She felt her own eyes mist over as he feebly sang the last few lines of the song and the music faded leaving nothing but this poor man’s anguish. Bianca took another step forward then another, getting closer to the grief-stricken man. She knew that he could hear her footsteps now without the music, but she didn’t care. She was compelled to comfort him. Placing a hand softly on his shoulder she waited for him to speak first.

“I, uh, heard some news today I wasn’t expecting,” his voice cracked as another sob racked his body.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered blinking back her tears.

“Expect the unexpected, right?” Nick looked up at her through his tears. When she pulled him in to comfort him, he didn’t protest.



* “Please Remember Me” by Tim McGraw

AJ nervously paced around the roof of the hotel before checking his watch again. He’d had everything set up for the last half hour and now he was trying to wait patiently to put his plan into action. It was ten minutes after seven and he had been expecting Bianca to be there before or right at seven. He figured that she would have called and let him know if she was going to be late and she didn’t have her cell phone on, so he couldn’t reach her. Looking down at his black suit, he nervously brushed away imaginary lint as he tried to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat.

Sitting down at the piano, he started picking out notes to a song he’d been working on since the night before. It wasn’t his best because he’d been in such a rush to get his feelings down on that paper, but it came straight from his heart. He knew that was all that mattered.

He turned quickly when the door opened a nervous smile playing on his lips. The smile faded when he saw that it was only Howie who was sticking his head out of the corridor, a curious expression on his face.

“Oh, hey D,” AJ couldn’t mask his disappointment.

“I was just coming to check on you,” Howie answered. Sensing AJ’s anxiousness he placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I’m sure she’s just stuck in traffic Jay.”

“I know. It’s too early to start worrying, but I just can’t help it.”

Howie nodded and stood there uncomfortably not knowing what to say. “Well, I’m probably gonna be meeting Mia soon so you’ll have to let me know how everything goes,” he finished with his famous wink. “See ya later.”

“Yeah, later, bro,” AJ forced a smile. “Have fun.”

After Howie was gone, AJ went back to picking out the notes on the ivory keys. He tried to shake the growing anxiety that had settled in the pit of his stomach, but there was no use. Until he heard something from Bianca, he was going to be worried.

---

“Hey this is Julie. I’m not home right now, but you know what to do…”

Brian listened to the sound of the tone for what seemed like the thousandth time that night, but once again, instead of saying anything he only hung up. Frustrated with himself, he scrubbed a hand over his face. He hadn’t shaved that morning and he was already beginning to notice the stubble on his chin. He made a mental note to not forget to shave when he got up in the morning.

Expelling a deep breath, he let his fingers remain on the receiver for another moment. He wanted so badly to call Julie and find out what was going on in her mind, but he just couldn’t bring himself to leave a message. Well, how is she going to know it’s you? He snorted aloud at the thought. Even if she didn’t have caller ID, it wouldn’t take a genius to know who had called and hung up that many times.

Standing up, he walked to the fridge and grabbed a can of soda and took a long sip before looking back at the phone. He knew he needed to at least leave a message to make sure she got home okay. Maybe she would call and let him know that much. Taking a deep breath, he picked up the phone with a trembling hand. Why am I so nervous?

After the standard three rings, he heard her voice once again… “Hey this is Julie. I’m not home right now, but you know what to do…”

“Uh… Hey Jules, it’s me… Duckie. I, um, I was just calling to, uh, make sure you got home okay. If you want, you can… you can give me a call later,” Brian took a breath and hesitated before finishing his though, “Love you Jules.”

***

Julie sat in the corner of her sofa with her knees pulled up to her chest and her arms wrapped tightly around her legs. She’d been there to hear every time her phone rang and knew that every time it was Brian. She didn’t need to check her caller ID to know. The way she left him in LA was wrong and she was sorry for hurting him that way, but she didn’t know what else to do. There had been so many emotions running through her mind that night it was completely overwhelming and the only thing she could think to do was run. Which was completely opposite of everything she had ever done in her life. She was not one to run away from anything… ever. But she did this time. Why?

“Because I’m scared of losing him again,” she answered the question aloud.

It hadn’t been easy watching him walk out of her life so many years before and now here he was again. And after what happened between them, watching him walk away again would be damn near impossible. Especially after she realized how she really felt about him. It was absolutely undeniable; she still loved him. A tear slipped down her cheek and she placed her forehead against her knees. She took a shaky breath and slowly let it out. What was she supposed to do now?

---

Kevin walked up to the door of the tiny restaurant feeling a little nervous. Tara Wellman, whoever she was, had certainly made him curious with her vague letter. He had to go and find out what this was all about. Standing in the doorway of the quiet eatery, Kevin glance around looking for someone he might even remotely recognize. Finally, he saw a tall redhead motion for him to join her in the corner. He hesitated for a moment and figured if she was the only one waiting for someone, she must be who he was here to see.

“Hi Kevin,” she offered a warm smile that he returned.

“Tara. How have you been?” he questioned politely hoping that she wouldn’t see right through him and realize that he had no idea who she was.

“I’ve been great, actually,” her smile was genuine and she wrapped her arm around a shy looking little boy sitting to her right. He couldn’t have been any older than two or three years old.

“Hey,” Kevin smiled at the little boy who seemed very bashful.

“You don’t remember me, do you, Kevin?” Tara asked with a small smile.

As soon as she asked that question, Kevin felt his face blaze with embarrassment. Clearing his throat, he shook his head. “No, I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay,” Tara said quietly as she looked down at the little boy and ruffled his hair. “We really didn’t have a chance to get to know one another and things kind of got started and ended on a bad note all in the same day.”

Confusion washed over Kevin. He had no idea what she was talking about because he was almost positive that they had never met before. He would remember her if they had. “I’m sorry, I really don’t mean to be rude, but how do we know one another?”

“I wouldn’t exactly say we know one another,” she kept her eyes down. “We only met once.” Kevin watched as she continued to run her fingers through the little boy’s hair refusing to meet his curious gaze.

“When?”

She looked up almost ashamed. “A few years ago.”

Kevin forced himself to try and remember. She was pretty and he was sure he would have remembered her. There was something familiar about her the more he gazed at her, but he really couldn’t put his finger on what it was. She was tall but not too slender; you could tell she’d had a child. Her skin was fair and her eyes were hazel. Not a supermodel, but she was someone who could turn heads walking down the street.

“It was a really bad time in my life and I’m guessing in your life, too,” she said quietly. “I’m not here to try and use you because I’ve moved on from what my life was back then, Kevin. And I knew you probably wouldn’t remember me, but I really needed to see you tonight.”

Kevin watched as a sad expression crossed her face. “Why would I think you were trying to use me?”

She looked down at her son and back up at Kevin, tears forming in her dark hazel eyes. “Kevin, I just wanted you to meet Christopher.”

Kevin, feeling a little nervous, looked at the little boy who was now peering from behind his mother’s arm. “It’s nice to meet you, little man.”

“Kevin, Christopher is your son.”

---

Bianca looked at Nick with tears in her eyes and a familiar ache in her heart. She didn’t know what to do or say now that the room was completely quiet. The only light came from the hallway and it seemed to cast an eerie glow on the two of them. Lowering her eyes to her hands, she became slightly uncomfortable.

“I didn’t expect you to come here,” Nick said quietly as he raked a hand through his already disheveled hair.

“I thought I was supposed to meet someone here,” she said absently.

“Your husband?” the words came out as if they had a bad taste.

Bianca squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed the lump in her throat. The anger in Nick’s voice hurt her and she hated it, but why? Why did it matter what he thought? Because you weren’t entirely over Nick… Holly’s words came back to her suddenly. She shook the thought away and let her eyes drift over to Nick. He looked horrible. She bit her bottom lip and then quietly stood up. She didn’t know if there was anything she could do to help him because it was her fault he felt like this in the first place.

“I’m sorry, Nick,” her voice trembled ever so slightly and she prayed to God he didn’t notice it. Just as she was turning to leave, she felt his hand close around her wrist. Surprised by this sudden action, she turned and saw that Nick was now standing over her, his brilliant blue eyes still filled with pain. “I should really get going.”

Nick shook his head. “No…”

“I… I really do have to go, Nick,” she whispered wishing she could break free of his grasp.

Then the unthinkable happened.

Before she even had time to react, Nick had fallen to his knees, slid his arms around her waist and pressed his head to her stomach. Her only reaction was to place her hands in his hair. She gently brushed some stray hairs away from his forehead and shut her eyes, willing the tears to go away.

Finally, Nick spoke. “Tell me one thing that would make you stay. I’ll do anything to keep you here.”

When you love someone - you'll feel it deep inside
And nothin else can ever change your mind
When you want someone - when you need someone
When you love someone...

When you love someone - you'll sacrifice
You'd give it everything you got and you won't think twice
You'd risk it all - no matter what may come
When you love someone
You'll shoot the moon - put out the sun
When you love someone*



* “When You Love Someone” by Bryan Adams

Bianca felt hot tears gliding down her flushed cheeks. Had she heard him right? Was he actually on his knees, his face nuzzling her stomach? Begging her to stay with him? She could feel the hair on his chin scratching against her skin as he let his lips glide over her navel. She tried to keep her composure as a tingle ran down her spine.

“Nick…” his name came out barely above a whisper. She tried clearing her throat, “Nick? Please… don’t do this.” She looked down into his eyes and saw that they held the same agony. “This is wrong, Nick.”

He pressed his face into her warm skin and tried not to lose control of his emotions. Taking in a soothing breath, he looked back up to see her eyes were still focused on him. “Bianca, I—”

“No,” she said firmly as she began to tug at his large frame wishing he would cooperate and stand up on his own. He did finally stand up, but he didn’t relinquish his grasp on her. She sighed, “Nick, we’ve been over this a hundred and one times. We can’t keep coming back to the same spot every time.”

“Why? Maybe someone’s trying to tell us something by bringing us back here! Look, Bean, I know I fucked up, okay? And I’ve been kicking myself ever since, so you don’t need to jump on that bandwagon. I just… I don’t understand…”

“What don’t you understand, Nick? AJ and I are married now. Things aren’t as simple as they used to be.”

The hurt flickered in his blue eyes, but he wasn’t willing to give up that easily. “You love me, Bianca! I can read it on your face. So please, stop lying to me!”

“I never said I didn’t love you!” she yelled and pounded her fists into his chest before falling against him in humiliation. “Is that what you wanted to hear? That I caused my first love to walk out of my life and never got over it? Well, there, now you know. But that doesn’t change the fact that there is also someone else with his heart on the line. This isn’t something any of us have any right to be selfish about because our hearts aren’t the only things at stake anymore.”

“You think I don’t realize that? I know what’s at stake, Bean, I really do, but don’t you see that I don’t care? I gave you my heart a long time ago with every intention of it belonging to you forever. That’s not a promise many people are willing to make anymore, but I did. And Bianca, I don’t back out on a promise like that.”

---

“I’m sorry?” Kevin asked with wide eyes. He laughed lightly and looked at Tara as though she’d grown a second head. “I think you might have me mixed up with someone else.”

“No, Kevin. I know this might look bad, but I wouldn’t have contacted you unless I needed to. I don’t need money or sympathy, and I sure as hell don’t want any fame. I just wanted my son to meet his father. Is that too much to ask?”

Kevin stared at her in shock. How was someone supposed to react to a situation like this? He couldn’t blow up and completely humiliate Tara because she had done nothing to deserve being treated that way. But he also didn’t know if he believed her story or not. He couldn’t even remember ever sleeping with her for heaven’s sake! Yet, here she was sitting in front of him and introducing him to Christopher, the bashful little boy that was supposedly his son. My son? He thought for a moment. My son, he thought again liking the way it sounded. He’d always wanted a son and now he was faced with that very possibility. But was it true?

“I don’t mean to offend you, Tara, but we’ll need to have a paternity test done just to make sure,” he said in a voice that was much calmer than he’d anticipated.

She finally smiled again and hugged Christopher close to her. “I understand, Kevin. And thank you. So much.”

Kevin offered a smile and nodded. He didn’t really know what to say and he didn’t know how he should be feeling. What if he really is my son? he asked himself as he started at the little boy a small smile still tugging at the corners of his mouth.

---

AJ sighed and looked out over the city. He had candles surrounding the setting he’d prepared for his romantic night with his wife though he had yet to actually light them. Their dinner was probably lukewarm and maybe even bordering on cold by now. All of the flowers he’s placed around the rooftop didn’t seem quite as spectacular anymore, and he himself was feeling pretty down. He closed the notebook with his songs in it and began to slowly play the melody of the song he’d prepared. He was so sure that the night would be perfect, and yet somehow he’d been wrong. He stopped only once to light a single candle atop the piano and then he softly began to sing:

The soft scent of your skin
And the gentle touch of your hand
Even when I’m far away
Thoughts of you draw me in

When things go wrong
And I fall down
When I’m trapped and can’t break free
You are the one
You make me the man I want to be

Hanging his head, he let the silence consume him.

“That was beautiful,” Bianca’s soft voice startled him. He turned to see her leaning against the frame of the door in the stairwell. She bit her lip and slowly made her way over to him and gently took a seat beside him. Reaching up, she tenderly caressed his cheek. “Sorry, I’m late… When I got your message to meet you at the studio I failed to listen to my other messages,” she explained with a sheepish smile. “Forgive me?”

“I wasn’t mad,” his handsome face broke into a smile and he brushed her hair away from her face and winked. “I just thought I’d been stood up for someone more handsome.”

“Aww, baby, you know there isn’t anybody more handsome than you,” she said quietly and placed a loving kiss on his lips.

“I love you,” his voice was filled with emotion and he wrapped his arms around her. “Do you know that?”

“Of course, but I never get tired of hearing it,” she said with a sly smile. She turned serious, “I love you, too, Aje.” She let him bring her closer and she snuggled comfortably against his body. They sat in silence for a moment before Bianca finally spoke again, “So can I hear the rest of that beautiful song?”

---

Brian was lying on his bed channel surfing without really paying attention when he heard a light knock on his door. He rolled his eyes wondering who was there to bug him. He wasn’t really in the mood for visitors. The person knocked again and Brian reluctantly stood up and slowly made his way to the door.

”Hey man, what’s up?” Kevin smiled and stepped inside the hotel room without waiting to be invited.

“Not a lot,” Brian shrugged. “Just bored.”

Kevin nodded and looked around. “You wanna hang out for a while? Go grab a bite to eat or something?”

Brian looked at his older cousin with his eyebrows raised. He hadn’t really been in the “hanging out” mood in the last few months and this was a surprise to him. “Yeah, sure. That sounds cool,” he smiled, “let me just grab my shoes.”

“Okay,” Kevin nodded and took a seat in the chair.

“All right, I’m ready,” Brian came out of his bedroom and grabbed his room key. “Where do you wanna go?”

Kevin shrugged, “Doesn’t matter to me. We can just ride around till we see somewhere that looks good.”

“Cool,” Brian nodded and checked his watch. 8:46. He started to grab his cell phone but hesitated. Nah… she won’t call. “Well, then, let’s get going.”

***

Julie sighed and pressed the “end” button on her cordless phone. It was almost midnight and Brian hadn’t answered the phone in his hotel room or his cell phone. “I guess I’ll just try back later. Way later,” she said miserably to herself as her cat jumped up her lap and got comfortable. “Looks like I really messed up this time, Mocha.”

She sat there for a few minutes rubbing Mocha behind the ears and staring out her apartment window. It looked like Brian was ignoring her now. “Okay, time for bed, Mocha.”

***

“I’ll just have a cheeseburger with fries and a Pepsi please,” Brian said to the waitress.

“I’ll have the same, please,” Kevin said. “Thanks.”

“So, what’s with the whole “I wanna be social now” thing?” Brian grinned and leaned back in the ragged booth. “Oh, nice place by the way.”

Kevin only laughed at his cousin and shrugged. “Hey, just cause it isn’t as fancy as what you’re used to doesn’t mean the food’s not good. And what do you mean the “I wanna be social now” thing?”

“Oh, come on Kevin,” Brian scoffed, “you know you haven’t exactly been overly friendly to anyone in a while. I’m just wondering what changed?”

“Let’s just say I had an eye opening experience,” Kevin answered vaguely before changing the subject. “What’s with the peach fuzz?”

“Peach fuzz? Hey, just cause I don’t have as much,” he paused to clear his throat, “facial hair as my cousin doesn’t mean anything. Nick’s the one with the fuzz.” They both laughed at the expense of their young friend and were pleased to see the waitress coming their way with their orders.

“Here you go fellas,” the older lady smiled and placed their food in front of them. “Enjoy.”

“Well, whatever happened, I’m glad you finally decided to get your ass back in shape,” Brian laughed and bit into his cheeseburger.

Kevin watched as his younger cousin took a sip of his soda. “I got to meet someone tonight.”

“Oh really? Who?” Brian asked with his mouth full. He stopped to take another sip of soda.

“Actually, that’s why my attitude has changed.”

Brian continued to drink his soda while looking at Kevin expectantly. At that moment, he reminded him of the little boy he used to be.

“Well, I’m not exactly sure yet, but he may be my son,” he answered with a smile. Before he knew it, the Pepsi that had been in Brian’s mouth came flying out and was all over Kevin and the table between them. “Damn it Brian! You do realize that’s the second time you’ve spit all over me today, don’t you??”

Brian didn’t know whether to laugh or just gawk at Kevin. He chose to ignore the irritated expression on his face and instead press for more information, “Did I just hear you right? Your son? Can you elaborate a little?”

“Well, see, that’s the thing. I can’t elaborate because I’m not even sure if it’s true yet or not. I don’t remember the woman, and the little boy is only about two or three…”

“But you would have been with Brianna…”

“That’s the other thing,” Kevin looked down at the table and then back at his cousin. “I’ll admit, there was a time that I wasn’t exactly faithful to her. It was when she left. I wasn’t really at a high point in my life and I wasn’t really doing things that I should be doing, so there is a possibility.”

Brian just sat in silence letting the news sink in. “Wow,” was the only word he could think to say.

“I know this doesn’t exactly make me look good,” Kevin said with an embarrassed chuckle, “but we all make mistakes, right? I just wanted to tell someone and I knew that person was you. I mean, I knew that you’d understand and at least be able to reassure me.”

Finally, Brian was coming out of his shocked state and he nodded. “Well, you know I support you no matter what happens, Kev. And you obviously seem kinda happy about the news, so if you’re happy, I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks,” Kevin smiled and stared down at his Pepsi-coated food.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about the explosion,” Brian laughed. “How about we get something to go?”

Kevin laughed out loud and nodded. “As long as you’re paying and you don’t spit on me anymore.”

“Deal.”

---

Howie smiled at his girlfriend Mia across the table as they sat in one of the finest Los Angeles restaurants. “I’ve had a really good time tonight,” he smiled and lifted her hand to his lips.

“Me too,” she said quietly and giggled as he continued to place feather light kisses on her hand. “You really are too sweet.”

“Well, you know, I try,” he grinned. “Would you like to dance?”

Mia smiled. “I would love to, but I need to go powder my nose first,” she leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his lips. “I’ll be right back.”

Howie smiled to himself as he watched her saunter off in the direction of the restrooms. He was finally beginning to feel normal again and he really enjoyed the time he got to spend with Mia. Of course, he still missed Ivy more than anyone knew, but he knew that she would have wanted him to be happy. Looking around the posh restaurant he smiled to himself again. Things were finally starting to look up.

***

Mia admired her reflection in the mirror of the women’s bathroom for a moment before turning around and leaning against the large marble counter. “Look, I know that you’re getting a kick out of this, but it’s not you that has to keep this act up all the time.”

“Just be patient, Mia. Remember… this was your idea in the first place.”

“I know, I know. It’s just I’m having a really hard time being patient with this. I’m ready to just be done with it so I can come home to you.”

“All in good time, Love. All in good time. Now go back out there and dance your sexy ass right into his bed… and his heart. Cause you know that’s what will get you his wallet.”

Mia giggled. “Consider it done. On both levels. Later, baby. Love you.”

“You too, babe.”

Flipping her tiny silver cell phone shut, she took one last glance in the mirror and adjusted her dress. “Okay, let’s do this,” she said quietly to herself and headed back to Howie. When she saw him, she smiled sexily and leaned down and let her lips linger over his ear. “Time for that dance now, Mr. Dorough.”

Kevin, Howie, Brian, AJ and Nick all sat around the large cherry table in the conference room. They were currently having a meeting with their managers and record label to discuss what direction the group would be heading in from here. At the moment, conversation had come to a very tense halt.

“Now, let’s not just make a decision that anyone will regret,” one of the suits said in a stuffy voice.

“We’ve all discussed this over and over,” Kevin spoke and his four band mates nodded gravely.

“Look, fellas, I think the five of you just need some more time to think about the decision you’re making. This is a big thing and you need to be 100% positive that this is what you want to do. Besides, don’t you think you should at least do one more album together for old time sake?”

“No, you look, we have already talked all of this over and we’ve come to the conclusion—as a group—that it’s time we took a break. We’re not saying that we’re breaking up, but we’re also not saying that we’ll ever record another album together. This is something we all need to do right now. So, whether you accept it or not, that is how it’s going to work,” Kevin said in a dangerously calm voice. “We all have things going on in our lives that need to take priority over our careers, and if you don’t understand that, too damn bad.”

The other four watched in stunned silence as Kevin stood up and stormed out of the room, leaving everyone speechless.

Finally, Brian cleared his throat and stood as well. “Uh, I think it’s safe to say that the meeting is over.” The other three nodded and slowly filed out of the conference room.

The record executives just sat in silence looking around the room. “Okay, so how are we gonna handle this?”

---

*Two Months Later*

“Are you sure that’s a good idea Howie?” AJ asked as he drove down the street toward his home. “I mean, all of us together in the same room… four of us will get along great, but I can think of one person that would object to the idea.”

“C’mon Jay, you and Nick really need to put this all behind you.”

“Well, tell that to Nick because I’m not the one holding a grudge,” AJ stated simply. “Anyway, just give me the time. You know Bean and I will be there.”

“Great. You guys be here at around 7 on Friday.”

“Sounds good, D. I’ll see ya later,” he said and ended the call. Perfect timing, he thought with a smile as he pulled his Mercedes into the gated driveway. Entering the large house he referred to as “his kingdom”, AJ made a run through the kitchen to grab a snack before heading into the basement studio where he knew he would find his wife.

“Hey AJ,” Matthew Davis, Bianca’s new manager, greeted.

“What’s up, Matt?” he asked as he took a seat to watch Bianca through the glass.

“She’s recording a hit, that’s what,” Matt grinned.

AJ just smiled at Bianca and felt his heart warm when she smiled back as she sang the lyrics she’d written.

Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I’d just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray

Trying hard to reach out
But when I'd try to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I pray
I could breakaway*

After she finished singing, she took a long sip from her water bottle and grinned. “Okay, Matt, I think I’ve earned a break.”

“Well, I guess. Just don’t get too used to this kind of treatment since your husband is here,” he said with a wink. “I’ve got a few calls to make, so I’ll just let you two have some privacy.”

Bianca came out of the recording booth and slid her arms around AJ’s neck. Placing a tender kiss on his awaiting lips, she smiled. “So, how is your day going?”

“It just got better actually,” he grinned and pulled her in for another kiss. “Sounds like yours is going great, too.”

She looked down and smiled. “Well, I don’t want to brag, but I think this could be a really big song for me. I’m really excited about it.”

AJ smiled and watched as she beamed. He sighed contentedly, and sat down in a chair, pulling Bianca onto his lap. “I’m really excited for you, Bean.” After a few minutes of comfortable silence, he nuzzled her neck. “Howie invited us to his place for a small get together on Friday night since everybody is going to be in town.”

“That’s great, I know you really miss seeing the other guys,” she smiled and lovingly brushed her thumb over his cheek.

“Yeah, I’m looking forward to seeing them. It’s already been two months.”

“Amazing how time flies when you’re having fun, huh?” she smiled devilishly.

---

Kevin sat in silence staring down at the unopened envelope on his desk in front of him. He was afraid to open it, not because of what it might say, but because what it might not say. In the past two months, he had become very used to the idea of having a son and now he was scared that the possibility would be snatched away. He took a deep breath and lifted the seemingly innocent envelope from the desk and ripped the end open then carefully slid the folded letter out. This was it. In a matter of seconds he would know whether or not Tara Wellman was telling the truth. He tried to swallow the lump of emotion that had risen in his throat. He had waited two months for this moment and now he couldn’t seem to have the courage to go any further.

After he met with Tara back in Los Angeles, Kevin tried to get used to the idea of having another child. He had always wanted a son; he wanted the type of cherished relationship with a son that he’d once shared with his own father. After insisting that there be a paternity test to be sure, Tara informed him that she also wanted the test but she first had some personal business to take care of back home in Alabama and she would be gone for at least a month maybe a little longer. After six and a half weeks, she contacted Kevin to let him know she would be coming to Florida if that was okay with him.

Now, almost a week later, Kevin finally had the results to the question that had been in the back of his mind for almost two months was about to be answered. If only he could unfold the paper and see for himself whether or not what he’d been telling himself was true. Come on Kevin, you have to do this now, he kept saying to himself. The telephone next to him began to ring, jarring him from his thoughts. Without a second thought, he reached over and lifted the receiver only to drop it right back into place. I have to do this. He looked at the picture on his desk; would he be able to get Kyra back into his life, too? If God did bless him with a son, would he let him have his daughter back? Just as he was about to open the letter, his cell phone began to chime. Like he’d done only moments earlier, he silenced the shrill ringing without answering the call. Another deep breath and he finally felt ready.

As he was unfolding the paper, he noticed for the first time that his hands were trembling. Scanning down the page he blinked once. Twice. Dropping the paper back onto his cluttered desk, he let his head fall into his hands as tears sprang to his eyes. He finally had his answer.

---

“So, are you coming to Howie’s on Friday?” Brian questioned as he finished topping off his sandwich with pickles. “I mean, it would be a shame if you didn’t show up…”

Nick switched his cell phone to his other ear and tried not to scowl. Was he going to Howie’s? That was a good question. He honestly didn’t know yet. “Not sure.”

Brian made a face but didn’t comment right away. “You know, it really wouldn’t hurt to come and try and have fun, Nick. It’s been two months since any of us have done anything together. Besides, it’s not going to kill you and it might actually do you some good. Who knows? You might even enjoy yourself!”

Biting back a comment that wasn’t very nice, Nick just expelled a breath and propped his feet up on the table in front of him. Leave it to Brian to make him feel like he had to go. He rolled his eyes. “I guess I’ll go if nothing else comes up.”

Brian snorted. “And what would that be? A movie at home in your pink footed jammies with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s? Come on, Nick, you know you don’t have anything to do so stop trying to make sorry excuses.

This time Nick did scowl. How the hell did Brian know if he had other plans or not? Sure, he didn’t, but that wasn’t the point. Brian didn’t know. “Like I said if nothing else comes up.”

This is fun, Brian thought with a smirk as he took a large bite of his sandwich. Not bothering to swallow he continued on with his next idea, “You know, Howie would probably be offended if you didn’t come for at least a little while.”

“Jesus, Brian, didn’t you mother ever teach you not to talk with that much food in your mouth? You sound disgusting.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Brian said in a bored tone, “So, are you coming or not?”

“Do I really even have a choice?”

“Nope.”

“Then I guess you already know that answer, don’t you?”

“Guess so,” he made sure Nick could hear his cheeky grin through the phone, “Just make sure you change out of your pink jammies before you leave the house, okay?”

“Brian?”

“Yeeeesss?”

“Eat shit.”

“Naaah, I think I’ll stick to my sandwich since it tastes better,” he said before he heard the click as Nick ended the call. Grinning to himself he shook his head. Sometimes annoying Nick was just so much fun.



* “Breakaway” by Kelly Clarkson

“Soon,” Mia whispered into her cell phone and looked to make sure she was alone in Howie’s den. “Look, I shouldn’t be talking to you now because I’m not alone. I’ll call you later.”

“Who are you talking to?” Howie asked as he handed her a glass of lemonade and made himself comfortable on his leather sofa.

“Oh, that was just a friend of mine,” she smiled and snuggled next to him. “So, are you looking forward to tonight?”

“I am,” Howie smiled. Brushing some stray hairs from Mia’s face he smiled, “I can’t wait for you to meet everybody.”

“I can’t wait either, baby. I just hope they like me,” she said with a nervous pout. “That’s the only thing I’m worried about. What if they don’t like me, Howie?”

“Mia they will love you,” he reassured her and pulled her closer to him on the sofa.

Mia fought the urge to groan. Howie wasn’t a problem; in fact, she actually found herself growing somewhat fond of him. His friends were another story. She knew she would eventually have to meet them all, but what if they were able to see through her? What if they suspected something? Those thoughts kept springing up in the back of her mind and they were becoming harder and harder to ignore.

Suddenly, Howie’s voice brought her back to the present and he was looking at her with an expression of concern. “What’s the matter?”

“Nothing, why?” she asked and shifted uncomfortably.

“You were frowning,” his face was still showing his concern.

“Oh,” she said quietly, “It’s nothing, I just have a headache.”

“Well, why don’t you go to my room and lie down for a while? That might help you feel better,” he placed a kiss on her forehead.

Mia nodded and smiled. “Okay, I’ll go rest for a little bit. Come get me in about an hour, okay?”

“Absolutely,” Howie smiled and kissed her cheek.

---

“Well, if you hadn’t decided to change a thousand times then we wouldn’t be running late, now would we?” AJ chided Bianca causing her to playfully swat his arm.

“I only changed twice and you know it,” she poked her tongue out as she tapped on Howie’s front door.

“You look beautiful, by the way,” he whispered as he softly kissed her shoulder.

“Okay, enough with the PDA’s people,” Brian loudly broke up their tender moment. “Don’t you two get enough of one another at home? God!”

Bianca laughed at his silly grin and leaned in for a friendly hug while AJ slapped his shoulder in a brotherly manner. Glancing into the den he saw that there were already plenty of people there. “So, are we the last to arrive?”

“Pretty much,” Brian laughed and moved aside for them to step into the house, “I wonder who we should blame for that?”

“I can’t believe this,” Bianca feigned anger, “I only changed twice. You know what? I will not stand here and take this! I’m going to find someone who will be nice.”

Brian and AJ just laughed as they watched her disappear into the crowd of people flooding Howie’s den. AJ shook his head and motioned toward the room, “Let’s go mingle, Rok.”

“Mingle? Are you kidding? I’ve been mingling for the past twenty minutes, I’m gonna go find some food!”

AJ just shrugged and stepped into the throng of people. He immediately spotted Howie by the stereo and started maneuvering his way over to greet his friend. He finally reached him and caught the older man in a hug. “Some shindig you got goin here, D.”

“Yeah, you could say that,” he laughed. “We have Mia to thank; she’s one helluva party planner.”

“Mia, huh?” he questioned with raised eyebrows, “Gotta love her taste.”

***

“Excuse me,” Bianca yelled above the music as she pushed her way toward the kitchen. Bumping into someone else, she turned and offered an apologetic smile, “Sorry.” Finally inside the spacious room, she walked over to the refrigerator and retrieved a bottle of water.

“What do you think you’re doing?” a female voice startled her.

Taking a sip of the refreshing water, Bianca kept the smirk off of her face. This must be Mia. “Hi, I’m Bianca. You must be Mia,” she extended her hand.

Mia just stood there with her arms crossed over her chest staring at Bianca like she’d just committed an awful crime. “Well, Bianca, what do you think you’re doing going through someone else’s stuff like that? Especially when there are refreshments provided for you in the other room.”

Bianca could no longer hide her smirk. “I didn’t think Howie would mind since it’s only a bottle of water. Anyway, it was nice to finally meet you.” Yeah, nice. Right. Shaking her head, she wandered back into the den where the music was still going and everyone was still having the time of their lives. Spotting AJ standing with Howie, she walked over and slid her arm around his waist. “I hope you don’t mind that I stole a bottle of water.”

“Not at all,” he winked, “Anyway, if you two will excuse me, I’m gonna go find Mia.”

“This should be interesting,” Bianca rolled her eyes when Howie was out of earshot.

***

Kevin didn’t bother knocking on Howie’s door before entering the packed house; no one would hear him anyway. Stepping into the room he was surprised at just how packed the house was. Scanning the room, he quickly spotted Brian standing on the far side of the room with Bianca. They seemed to be immersed in conversation and didn’t notice he’d joined them.

Finally, feeling someone standing next to him, Brian turned and saw his cousin standing there with a broad grin. “Hey, man, what took you so long to get here?”

“Business,” he said simply and smiled at Bianca. Moving closer he gave her a warm hug, “Hey, Bean.”

“Hey, Kevin. How are you?” Bianca smiled.

“Pretty good,” he nodded, still smiling. “Staying busy that’s for sure.”

“Kev!” AJ and Howie called in unison as they joined the others in the huddle.

AJ grinned and knocked him in the shoulder. “How are things?”

“Good,” he said with a nod. “So D, why didn’t you have all this at Tabu instead?”

“Well, I didn’t actually know that this many people were going to show up,” he said with a laugh. “I didn’t know how many people Mia invited until today, so by then it was too late to change locations.” Spotting Mia across the room, Howie smiled. “Speaking of Mia... I’ll catch you guys later.”

Looking around the still crowded room, Bianca noticed that the group of people that had been seated on the sofa was now getting up to leave. “C’mon guys, lets go sit down.”

AJ, Bianca and Brian all settled onto the sofa while Kevin made himself comfortable in a nearby chair. They all remained silent for a few minutes before Brian finally spoke up.

“So, what kind of business made you late?”

Kevin inhaled deeply. At the moment, Brian was the only one that knew he was awaiting results of a paternity test. He had planned on telling everybody, but he didn’t know if this was the time or place. Clearing his throat, he decided it was as good a time as any. “I had a few phone calls to make since I got the results of the paternity test back the other day.”

Brian’s eyes went wide, “Well?”

“Whoa… wait a minute… paternity test?” AJ asked. He and Bianca were both obviously shocked.

“Long story,” that was going to be all the explanation Kevin would offer for the night and they knew that by his tone.

“So? What’s the deal?” Brian interrupted impatiently.

Kevin smiled and nodded. “Chris is my son.”

Brian reached over and clasped his cousin on the shoulder silently congratulating him. He knew how Kevin wanted the results to turn out this way and he was truly happy for him.

“Well, damn man, that is great!” AJ stood up and gave Kevin a brotherly hug.

Kevin kept grinning and nodded. “I know. It is.”

***

“I was beginning to think you were gonna be a drama queen and stay at home in your footie jammies,” Brian grinned as he greeted Nick. “What’s up with the whole “I’ll be an hour late” diva thing man?”

“I was doing stuff,” Nick rolled his eyes at his friend. “Got a problem with that?”

“No problems at all.”

“Hey baby,” a tall leggy blonde came up and linked her arm through Nick’s. “Sorry that took so long.”

When the girl was looking the other way Brian wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. He laughed to himself when Nick narrowed his eyes and tried to look menacing.

“Well, Nick, I’m heading home. Uh, have fun. And it was nice meeting you…”

“Tasha,” she smiled.

“Nice to meet you Tasha. Keep this boy in line for us, okay? Later, man.”

Nick scowled and turned to walk the other way when he heard his date gasp. “What’s wrong?”

“Isn’t that Bianca Parker?”

He groaned inwardly and turned to look. Sure enough, Bianca, hand in hand with AJ, was heading in their general direction. Great. “Yeah, that’s her.”

“Do you think I could meet her?! I’m a huge fan!”

He snorted. Of course you are. “Sure.” When Bianca and AJ were just a few feet away, he pushed his way past the people that were standing between them. “Hey guys.” He noted that his voice sounded a little too cheerful and his smile was more than a little forced. Surprisingly, Bianca and AJ didn’t seem to notice that.

“Hi,” Bianca greeted hesitantly while AJ just stood staring as though Nick’s head had started spinning 360 degrees.

“Hey,” Tasha spoke up eagerly.

“This is my date Tasha—”

“I’m a HUGE fan,” she gushed before Nick could explain.

Nick felt his face turning a furious shade of scarlet as he watched AJ smirk. Bianca only smiled politely and offered her thanks.

“It was really nice meeting you!” Tasha said with grin.

“You too,” Bianca nodded. Looking at Nick she smiled, “It was good seeing you.”

“Yeah,” he mumbled, “you too.”

“Bye!” Tasha called eagerly as she and Nick disappeared into the still partying crowd.

“Well, THAT was interesting,” Bianca said as she and AJ made their way out to their car.

“This whole night has definitely been interesting,” AJ laughed and kissed her the side of her head.

It was a couple of weeks after Howie’s party and Bianca was down in her studio trying her best to focus on her music. She looked up from what she was doing when she heard someone coming down the stairs into her studio. She couldn’t help but laugh when Matt peered around the corner and offered a grin. “Why do you look like you’ve done something wrong?” she asked and motioned him over.

“I haven’t done anything wrong. I just wanted to make sure you were in a good mood… I never can tell when you’ll be riding your broom.”

“Ha ha…” she said dryly. “So, are you just here to annoy the fucking hell out of me or does your visit serve a greater purpose?”

“A little of both actually. I have a list of events that we need to go through and make decisions on. You, my dear, are a coveted young woman.”

Bianca only smiled. “So, what kind of events are we talkin’ here?”

“Several,” Matt mumbled as he ruffled through the papers he’d brought with him. “I see something about the National Anthem at a sporting event… some kind of auction… Those look like the most interesting.”

Bianca thought about it for a second. “I could definitely do the sporting event, but what kind of auction are we talking? Cause those have always seemed a little stuffy to me. And I’ve never known them to need entertainment for that type of thing.”

“Well, it’s not the traditional auction really,” he answered. “It’s more the kind where you’re the item being bid on. It’s just to raise money for charity.”

“No way,” Bianca shook her head. “Not gonna happen, Matty.”

“Why not? It’s all for fun and a good cause. You should at least think about it, Bean,” he tried to reason with her.

“Sorry, but I just wouldn’t really be comfortable with it. You understand that, right? But hey, put me down for the sporting event definitely. And remember, football is my preference,” she finished with a wink. Ignoring his pout, Bianca just shook her head, “Anything else I might be interested in?”

Realizing that she wasn’t going to change her mind, he admitted defeat and began sorting through his papers again. “There might be something here…”

---

Kevin checked his watch as he paced anxiously around his living room. Tara and Chris would be arriving any minute and he was more than a little nervous. Tara called him that morning to let him know she was back in town after a trip home to Alabama and asked if he wanted to spend the afternoon with Chris. She had a few errands to run and knew Chris wouldn’t be up to being carted all over town.

Expelling a long breath, Kevin stole a glance at the clock above his mantle. Two minutes had passed. He took a seat on his sofa and instantly began to nervously bounce his legs up and down. He couldn’t deny exactly how nervous he was with this being his first day alone with his son, but as nervous as he was, excitement seemed to fill his entire being. He felt a smile creep onto his face at the thought of the afternoon ahead. Chris, he realized suddenly, was at that fun age where he was becoming his own little person. We’ll be able to do tons of things together, Kevin thought happily.

Another glance at the clock above the mantle surprised Kevin; he’d been lost in thought for nearly twenty minutes. Standing up, he walked over to the window and glanced out. He couldn’t ignore the nervous ball that had formed in his stomach when he spotted Tara’s SUV nearing the gate. Before Tara could get her window down to press the button, Kevin had opened the gate and stepped outside to greet her. He raked a shaking hand through his jet black hair and stepped around her vehicle to open the driver’s side door.

“Hi,” Tara smiled wearily as she stepped out of SUV. She placed a soft kiss on Kevin’s cheek and opened the door to get Chris.

“Hey little man,” Kevin stooped down so he and Chris were level. He couldn’t hide his grin as Chris threw his tiny arms around his neck and squeezed with all his might. He tried to swallow the knot of emotion that had suddenly formed in his throat as he stood up. He was very aware of the grip Chris had on his finger.

“He’s really excited about today,” Tara said smiling.

“He’s not the only one,” he replied gazing down at the toddler. Glancing back to Tara, Kevin’s face filled with concern. “Are you okay?”

“I know I look like crap,” she said with a laugh and shrugged her shoulders. “I just haven’t been sleeping well and I’m feeling a little run down I guess, but I’ll be okay. Anyway, I’ve got a bag with all the stuff you’ll need. Chris already had lunch and then he took a quick nap, so he’s good for a while. He’s got another change of clothes in case you two wanna get dirty in the yard,” she grinned. Tapping her chin she tried to think of anything she might have forgotten. “I just have a few things to do, but I have my cell phone and I left the number in the inside pocket of the bag so if something happens and you need to get me, you can.”

“Tara, we’ll be fine. This isn’t the first time I’ve spent the day with a child.”

Tara’s face began to turn pink and she offered a sheepish smile. “Sorry… you know how a parent will worry.”

“That I do. But we’ll be fine. We’re gonna have a blast, right Chris?”

They both laughed as Chris just grinned up at the both of them.

---

Brian huffed to himself as he shuffled into his kitchen. Walking into his pantry he grabbed a box of cereal and frowned when he realized it was nearly empty; there was enough for a small serving, but he’d been looking forward to a huge bowl. Oh well… Opening the refrigerator he lifted the milk carton from its place on the shelf and his frown returned. Empty. He had wanted a bowl of cereal because he didn’t feel like cooking or ordering something from somewhere and he certainly hadn’t felt like going anywhere. Yet, here he was with a nearly empty box of Cookie Crisp and no milk to eat it with. This is just my luck, he thought miserably as he dropped the empty milk carton into the trashcan and started for the door. Grabbing his keys, wallet and cell phone, Brian climbed into his car and grudgingly headed for the place he hated more than anything on earth: the grocery store.

He was relieved to see that the parking lot wasn’t packed, but instead of taking a chance, Brian reached into his glove box and pulled out his baseball cap. He pulled it low over his eyes and started inside. Grabbing a shopping cart, Brian expected to tug it out of place and be on his way, but he had no such luck. The cart didn’t move. Pulling a little harder, Brian swore under his breath when the cart still would not budge. Just as he was about to have another round with the damn cart, a woman came up and placed her purse inside before easily pulling it out of place and heading through the automatic doors and disappearing around the corner.

“Well, now don’t I feel like a jackass?” he grumbled and grabbed the next shopping cart. He was relieved that he had no problem with this one and could only hope that no one had seen his fight with the first cart. Still grumbling to himself Brian set off, hoping it would be rather painless.

Half an hour later, Brian was standing in line with his shopping cart rounded over and nearly toppling. He was still in a sour mood and only wanted to get home so he could have one measly bowl of cereal. He really didn’t think that was too much to ask… He was uninterested as the smiling teenager began scanning the items in his shopping cart; he could tell that she was trying to place him and he just wanted her to hurry before she actually recognized him. Finally, Brian found himself pushing his shopping cart full of groceries out to his car. He had made sure he wouldn’t be shopping again for quite some time. Just as he was loading the last bag into his trunk he realized he’d forgotten the one thing this trip had been about.

“Son of a bitch,” he drug a hand through his curls. “I forgot to get milk.”

With a heavy sigh and a scowl on his handsome face, Brian went back into the store. One item… surely he’d be in and out in no time. The dairy aisle just happened to be on the other side of the store, but he already knew what he needed; nothing to distract him… He grabbed a gallon of whole milk and turned to go check out. Just as he turned the corner, he suddenly collided with someone causing groceries to fly in all directions.

“Damn! I’m really sorry,” Brian said quickly, his mood souring even more.

“It’s okay,” the brunette said flustered. “I wasn’t paying attention either.”

“Here, let me help you,” he quickly began gathering her items. They both finally looked up when he began dropping what he’d picked up into her basket.

“Brian?”

Almost instantly, he felt his bad mood begin to melt away and a smile replaced the frown on his face. “Nicole?”

She tilted her head to the side and smiled. “Fancy meeting you here, stranger.”

---

Nick stumbled downstairs trying to figure out exactly what woke him from his nap. Rubbing a hand over his face he made a mental note to shave the next morning. Finally, he realized someone was knocking on his front door. How the hell did they get inside the gate? he asked himself as he suddenly became more coherent. He looked down at himself and noticed that he’d forgotten to grab a t-shirt before coming downstairs. Opening the door, he found himself face to face with Tasha.

“Hi, Nicky,” she smiled sweetly and tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder as she pushed past him into the foyer.

“Um, Tasha, I don’t want to be rude or anything, but what are you doing here? And how did you get inside the gate?”

“Silly Nicky, I told you this morning I was coming over and you gave me the code to get in.”

“Oh…” Nick silently cursed himself and made another mental note—this time to change the code to the gate. “Tasha, I really don’t feel like doing anything tonight. I’m tired and need to catch up on some sleep.”

Turning to look at Nick, she ran a hand down his bare chest, stopping to trace one of his tattoos. She let her hand rest on his waist and leaned in to kiss his neck. She paid special attention to the spot on the right just above his collar bone and smiled to herself when she felt his body relax. “Do you really want me to leave? We could have so much fun, Nicky.”

Nick composed himself and pushed her away from him. As easy as it would be to give in to her and just go upstairs (where he’s sure they would stay all night), he couldn’t do this anymore. “Look, Tasha, this just isn’t a good idea, okay?”

“No, it’s not okay,” she said as her eyes turned cold. “What am I to you? Am I just someone you call when you need a good fuck? That’s it, isn’t it? I’m nothing more than someone who will warm your bed at night.”

“Tasha…”

“No, Nick, you tell me the fucking truth! What am I to you?”

Finally, having had enough, Nick snapped. “Nothing Natasha! You’re nothing to me! Okay? Everything you just said is true! I don’t care about you, and I’m sorry. My heart belongs to someone else and that’s not gonna change anytime soon!” Before he knew what happened, her hand met his cheek with enough force to bring tears to his eyes.

“You can go to hell, Nickolas!”

“I’m already there,” he mumbled as he watched her leave, his blood boiling and his face burning with shame.

Bianca sped down the deserted highway with tears in her eyes and no regard for safety. She was too upset to pay attention to anything going on outside of her BMW. There was a voice in the back of her mind telling her she should slow down and pay attention to the road in front of her, especially since rain was coming down steadily and didn’t look like it would be letting up anytime soon. She glanced down at the speedometer and chose to ignore the nagging in her stomach; she was already going 85 mph and only pressed her foot harder on the accelerator.

She was trying her best to figure out what had happened between the time she’d been talking with Matt in her studio and the time AJ got home. He hadn’t been in the best mood for whatever reason, but she didn’t think they would start fighting. She couldn’t even pinpoint what their fight had even been about! All she knew was AJ had been in a bad mood and they’d suddenly started screaming at one another. The next thing she knew, she’d grabbed her car keys and tore out of their driveway not knowing exactly where she was going.

Bianca still didn’t know where she was going. It was getting dark and raining harder, but she had no intention of returning home just yet. She would definitely say more things she’d regret later if she went back now. She smirked to herself when she thought about how pissed AJ would be when he tried calling her cell phone, only to hear it ringing from the next room. Serves him right, she thought huffily as she continued to floor the accelerator. As angry as she was, she felt more hurt than anything. She just wanted answers to the questions that plagued her mind. Why had he been so angry? What had she done? Would he be over it by the time she got home? As angry as she was, she couldn’t help but hope that her leaving would be good for both of them and not cause another fight.

Suddenly, Bianca realized that she had no idea where she was. She hadn’t seen another car for miles and the only building in sight seemed to be an old, run down gas station that looked like it had been out of service for years. “This is great. Let’s top off my day by adding me getting lost to the list. Serves me right,” she mumbled as fresh tears slipped down her cheeks. Taking her eyes off the road ahead, she glanced in the rearview mirror not surprised to see nothing but dark clouds and rain. A loud sound suddenly brought her attention back to the highway stretched out in front of her and she gasped in surprise. While she’d been paying attention to the scenery behind her, a car had come out of nowhere and now, she was swerving not to hit it. Unfortunately, she still clipped the side of the other car and screamed as her BMW began to hydroplane into a spin. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut and just began to pray until she felt the car come to a sudden stop. Taking a deep breath, she was almost afraid to open her eyes. When she finally did, she saw that her car was now in a ditch. “Great. Good going, Bianca.”

---

Nick sang along to the song on the radio and tried to keep himself from feeling like the complete jerk he knew he was. After Tasha left, he felt like everything was just closing in around him and he couldn’t take it anymore. Nothing a long drive won’t cure, he’d thought to himself as he grabbed his keys and set out for the open road. He didn’t have anywhere to go and as much as he wished it would work, this drive wasn’t taking his mind off the things he’d said to Tasha.

The scene kept playing over and over in his mind.

“No, it’s not okay,” she said as her eyes turned cold. “What am I to you? Am I just someone you call when you need a good fuck? That’s it, isn’t it? I’m nothing more than someone who will warm your bed at night.”

“Tasha…”

“No, Nick, you tell me the fucking truth! What am I to you?”

Finally, having had enough, Nick snapped. “Nothing Natasha! You’re nothing to me! Okay? Everything you just said is true! I don’t care about you, and I’m sorry. My heart belongs to someone else and that’s not gonna change anytime soon!” Before he knew what happened, her hand met his cheek with enough force to bring tears to his eyes.

“You can go to hell, Nickolas!”

“I didn’t have to be so mean about it, did I?” he rubbed a hand over his scruffy chin feeling that much worse. Tasha was a nice girl and God knows Nick enjoyed the time they spent holed up together in his bedroom, but he just couldn’t keep jumping into a relationship that he couldn’t put his heart into. How many women had he been with to try and take his mind off her? Too many…

The rain was coming down harder now and he knew he would need to get back home soon. It was nearly nightfall and with the storm clouds rolling overhead, it was already dark. Maybe he still had time to go and beg Tasha’s forgiveness. He didn’t care if she never wanted to see him again, but he just couldn’t live with what he’d told her; he knew he had to apologize to her for that no matter what.

Peering through the rain, Nick spotted another car coming his way. Looks like I’m not the only one who needed to get away from the city, he thought miserably. Taking another look, he saw that the speeding BMW was swerving terribly and he laid down on the horn. He watched as the driver tried to get back into their lane, but it was too late. Next he felt the collision as the BMW caught the back end of his Mercedes; he tried to control the car as it went into a half spin. He watched in horror as the other car hydroplaned and crashed into the ditch. “This is just great…”

---

Bianca groaned and reached down to unbuckle her seatbelt. The only smart thing she’d done all day was remember to put that on. Now that the car was stopped she was able to take in the situation. Why had she been so stupid? Driving the way she did? Reaching up, she felt blood trickling down her temple and she noticed that her right ankle felt stiff. “God, I hope I didn’t break it…”

From outside her car, she heard someone yelling.

“Are you okay?”

She tried to open the door, but it was stuck. Wonderful… I really fucked up. Rolling down her window, she looked up and didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Nick was staring at her wide eyed and open mouthed.

“You’ve gotta be fuckin kiddin me!” he cried and threw his hands in the air. “Where did you get your driver’s license, Bianca, the fuckin dollar store?”

“Excuse me?” she tried to think of something else to say, but words were failing her right now. This could not get any worse.

“You were drivin like a bat outta hell, swerving all over the fuckin road and shit! Were you even paying attention to the road? What the hell were you doing anyway?”

“Fuck off, Nick,” Bianca screamed through her tears. She was in pain and she couldn’t get out of her car… the last thing she needed was Nick yelling at her. She tried once again to open her door, but it was obviously stuck. Her only other options were crawling over the console and trying the other door, or climbing out through her already open window. Well, just call me Dale Jr., she thought hatefully as she attempted to pull herself up and through the window.

“What are you doing?” Nick called annoyed.

“What does it look like, Einstein? I’m trying to get out of this car,” she winced as her right ankle hit the seat. Before she knew what was happening, she felt Nick reach into the car. His right arm circled her waist and his left arm went under her knees as he lifted her from inside the car. It took some effort, but he managed to pull her out without hurting her further.

Putting her down, Nick noticed she looked like hell. There was a large cut above her left eye and another on her neck, probably from the seatbelt she’d been wearing. Her right ankle was also swollen.

“Thanks,” she avoided his eyes and began to limp in the direction she’s come from.

“Where are you going?” Nick called over the drenching rain as he followed her.

“Home.”

“You’re kidding, right? You can’t possibly walk home from here in your condition. Have you lost your mind?”

“Quite possibly.” Turning to look at Nick, she frowned, “Why are you following me anyway? Taking pity on me? Or just pissed cause I hit your car?”

“Well, for one, you look like shit and you don’t need to keep walking when I have a car. If you wanna call it taking pity on you, whatever, but I would feel pretty shitty if I just got in my car and drove off leaving you to fend for yourself out here. And yeah, okay, I’m pissed you hit my car cause you obviously don’t know how to fucking drive,” he said matter-of-factly. Grabbing her arm, he turned her to face him. “Stop being a stubborn bitch and get in my car.”

“Fuck you, Nick.”

“Bianca, don’t make me pick your prissy ass up and put you in the car, because I will.”

Huffing loudly, Bianca limped behind him and slid into the front seat of his Mercedes. Rubbing her arms she tried to warm herself, but it was no use; she was chilled inside and out.

“Shit,” Nick mumbled as he got into the car.

“What is it?”

“My tire’s flat.”

“Well, you have a spare, don’t you?”

“Of course I do.”

“Well, okay, what’s the problem?”

“I don’t have the tools to change the tire.”

Bianca laughed sarcastically. “This is just great.”

“Don’t get pissy, Bean, it’s your fault we’re in this mess anyway,” he sighed. Leaning over on the steering wheel, he spotted the old gas station just up the road. “Look, you stay here. I’ll be right back.”

“Not so fast, Blondie. Where are you going?”

“See that old service station over there? Well, I thought maybe I might be able to find some tools to change that damn tire so we can get you to the hospital.”

“Don’t even begin to think that you’re leaving me in this car by myself, buddy. I’m coming with you.”

“You need to stay off that ankle, Bianca. I’ll only be gone a few minutes.”

“No way, Nick! I’m not staying here. What if some crazy psycho killer comes out of nowhere and murders me while you’re looking for tools? Absolutely not!”

“Fine. God, you’re such a damn drama queen.”

“Whatever.”

Stepping back into the icy rain, Nick sucked in a breath. The temperature was dropping fast. Looking over at Bianca, he saw her face contort with pain as she began to limp toward the old abandoned building. “Wait,” he said and walked over to her.

“Yeah?” she asked just as Nick hoisted her up over his shoulder. “What are you doing?”

“Look, you’re in pain, and I’m fine. The least I can do is carry you so you don’t have to walk on that foot, okay? So just shut up and deal with it, Bianca.”

“I cannot believe this. Nick, you are crazy…”

“No, I just felt sorry for you, okay?”

He continued walking, completely ignoring Bianca. He was thankful when he tried the door to the service station and found it unlocked. Walking inside, he sat Bianca down on the dusty counter and began to look around.

“What exactly are you looking for?” she asked after a few silent minutes.

“A jack and a lug wrench,” he answered absently and continued looking. He had a feeling he wasn’t going to find the tools he needed. Finally giving in to the fact that there weren’t any tools, he walked back over to Bianca and surveyed her injuries. The gash above her left eye was still bleeding and her ankle had swollen to more than twice its normal size already. Reaching up he wiped away some of the blood that had trickled down her face.

“Oww…” she moved back away from his hand.

“Sorry,” he said quietly. Looking around for something he could use to clean up her cut, he didn’t find anything opting instead for the white t-shirt he was wearing beneath his Santa Monica sweatshirt.

“What are you doing?” Bianca asked, alarmed when Nick stripped off his shirts. She watched in confusion as he began ripping the plain white t-shirt into strips.

“Just chill out,” he said quietly as he began wiping the area around the cut above her eye. “I wish I had some alcohol or something.”

She winced as he pressed the cloth against the open wound. Closing her eyes and biting her bottom lip, she felt a tear slip from her eye.

Nick noticed this, too, and reached up with his left hand to gently brush it away. “Why are you crying?”

“It just hurts,” she whispered quietly and kept her eyes tightly closed.

Yeah, it does, Nick thought sadly. “Here, just keep pressure on it, okay? That will help until we can get you to the hospital. It looks like you might need stitches. How’s your ankle?”

“Hurts like a bitch,” she muttered dejectedly. The situation had suddenly turned awkward.

Lifting her right leg, Nick gently pressed the area just above the swelling and caused Bianca to recoil. “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”

“I know,” Bianca nodded. She remained silent for a moment before turning to look at Nick, “I’m really sorry about all of this. I was just really upset and wasn’t paying attention at all. I feel like a complete moron because I knew better than to be out in this kind of weather driving like a madwoman.”

Nick turned to look at her and moved so that he was standing right in front of her with his hands on her thighs. “It’s okay, Bean. I overreacted back there and I’m sorry. It really scared me when I saw you in that car, and I didn’t know how to handle that,” he reached his hand up to brush back the wet tangles of hair falling into her face. “I don’t know what I would have done if it had been worse…”

Bianca leaned into his palm savoring the warmth for longer than she should have. “Nick…”

“Bean, I love you and I can’t help that. I can’t just make myself stop… it’s second nature to me.” Another tear slipped down her cheek, but this time Nick kissed it away. He noticed the shudder that coursed through Bianca’s body as he did this. “I tried letting go, but there’s no one that gets to me the way you do.”

Opening her eyes, she looked into his, the oceans of blue consuming her. Before either of them knew what was happening, they were locked in a fiery kiss that warmed them to the core.

Breaking away, breathless, Nick pulled her closer to him. “Can you deny what we have? When we kiss… the fire between us… it’s still there, Bean.”

“Nick…” her voice broke with emotion. She tried to deny it for so long… “I never stopped loving you, I just stopped letting it show…”

Bianca lay on a hospital bed in a private room in the busy emergency room wrapped in a thick blanket while Nick was sprawled in the chair in the corner, his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes closed. A chill coursed through her body and she pulled the blanket closed more tightly. She had wanted to say something to Nick for the longest time, but she couldn’t find the words. Trying to find the right thing to say had proven impossible. Closing her eyes she relived the moment of the passion they’d shared just a few hours earlier. His lips on hers, their bodies melting together as thunder crashed in the distance…

“Are you okay?” Nick broke her thoughts, concern written on his handsome face.

Bianca felt her cheeks being to warm and only nodded as she avoided meeting his eyes. She was weak when she did that, and right now she couldn’t afford to be weak.

Suddenly, the doctor came into the room and smiled. “How are you feeling?”

Bianca only smiled politely and nodded.

“Well, it looks like you don’t have any fractures in your ankle,” he said pointing to the x-ray, “but you do have a severe sprain. You’ll need to stay off your feet as much as possible and keep ice on the injury. I’ll have the nurse come to fit you for a brace and we’ll get you some crutches.” Another nod from Bianca and the doctor was on his way again.

Suppressing a sigh, Bianca tried to occupy her mind. She’d asked the nurse to call AJ as soon as they’d arrived at the hospital and again after she’d gotten stitches for the gash over her left eye. There was still no word from him. The room she was in didn’t have a telephone and they assured her that if they had any news from AJ or if he arrived, she would be the first to know. She was growing restless and jittery; she couldn’t even turn over in the hospital bed because her right ankle was propped up so high.

“Can I do anything for you?” Nick asked quietly, noticing Bianca’s agitation.

“No, thanks.”

Nick nodded and began twiddling his thumbs. Bianca’s silence spoke volumes and while he didn’t regret anything that they had done in the last few hours, he knew she did. She was worried about AJ, understandably, but he couldn’t shake the jealous feeling that had settled in his stomach. At the end of the day, nothing had really changed after all. They had shared their feelings and more, but as soon as that car stopped to see if they were okay and offered to bring them into town, everything that was happening between them came to a sudden stop. Bianca wouldn’t even look at him now and that broke his heart all over again. Rubbing his hands on his jeans, Nick stood up.

“Well, Bean, I’m gonna get going if you’re okay. AJ will probably be here any minute and then you’ll get to go home.”

Bianca bit her lip and willed the tears that were stinging her eyes to go away. With a short nod she whispered, “Okay. Sorry, again. For everything…”

Staring straight into her eyes, Nick shook his head, “I’m not.”

Bianca turned her head to the wall and tried to discreetly wipe away the tears that had escaped. She turned just as he was leaving the room, “Nick… I…”

He stopped but did not turn around to face her. He waited for a moment to see if she would say anything else, but she never did. “Goodbye, Bianca.”

---

Brian laughed and ducked out of the way of a french fry that Nicole had hurled at him from across the table. They were seated inside a nearly deserted, cozy little café enjoying each other’s company. Smiling, Brian picked up a fry from his plate and popped it into his mouth just as a comfortable silence settled between them.

“You know what’s really funny?” Nicole questioned as she took a sip from her glass, absently staring out the window.

“What’s that?”

“I was thinking about you this morning. How good it would be to see or hear from you.”

Brian’s smile grew wider. “Is it everything you’d hoped for?”

Nicole laughed and tossed another fry at him. “You’re so crazy… and yes, it’s really good to see you. I guess I didn’t realize it until today, but I’ve really missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too, Nikki.”

This time the silence that fell over them wasn’t quiet as comfortable and they both felt the tension. Taking a final sip from her glass, Nicole regretfully stood up. She straightened her denim skirt and pushed a strand of dark hair from her face. “Well,” she said slowly, letting Brian’s smile warm her, “I really should get going. I’ve got a ton of things I still need to do.”

Brian stood and nodded slowly. “Same here.” He pulled her into an embrace that seemed to last longer than it should have and they both seemed to linger in each other’s arms a little longer than normal. Brian took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet scent that was so familiar to him and closed his eyes. Nicole pressed her forehead against his cheek and felt herself sigh contentedly. Finally, Brian realized they’d been standing this way for quite some time and reluctantly pulled back to look at Nicole. They both chuckled slightly.

“We must be a sight.”

“Would you like to go get some dinner with me tomorrow night?” Brian asked, his eyes twinkling.

“I’d love that,” she grinned.

---

Kevin smiled at Chris as they sat on the floor of his living room playing with Chris’ toys. It was amazing how quickly Chris had warmed up to him. As he rolled the little red fire truck in front of his son, Kevin couldn’t help but think how much he’d missed out on in Kyra’s life so far.

Shaking that thought from his mind, he tried to imitate the sound a truck would make and watched as Chris sat mesmerized. Finally, after a few more minutes, Chris looked up at him and stood up.

“I’m hungwee…” Chris said quietly as he placed a tiny finger on Kevin’s tanned cheek.

“Okay, sport, let’s go see what we can find to eat.”

“Daddy?”

Kevin never imagined that one simple word could catch him off guard so suddenly, but it did. And before he realized what was happening, his eyes had filled with tears. Realization hit him and he knew that Chris was staring at him expectantly. He cleared his throat, “Yeah, buddy?”

“Can we get a happy meal?”

Kevin laughed out loud and lifted Chris above his head before bringing the small child in for a tight embrace. “We can get whatever you want.”

---

“Can I get you anything?” AJ asked quietly as he carried Bianca’s things into their bedroom while she hobbled over to the bed.

“No,” she stated flatly, “I’m fine.”

AJ stood in the middle of the large master bedroom not knowing what to do with himself. He felt as though he should make himself useful, but Bianca had made it clear that she had not forgotten their fight earlier. He also couldn’t forget it; he couldn’t help but think that had they never started fighting she never would have been in an accident. But they did and she was, and the only thing he could do now was apologize and hope she would forgive him. Cautiously, AJ went over to the bed and helped Bianca get settled in. He made sure she had enough pillows behind her back and that her ankle was elevated. He was beginning to feel out of place once again.

“I’m fine, AJ,” she said quietly as she reached over and picked up the television remote. Her intention was to completely ignore him for now; it might make her feel less guilty about the day’s events if she remained angry with him.

“Okay,” he nodded. Taking her obvious hint, he headed for the door. Stopping for a moment he looked at her with sad brown eyes. He came back to the bedside and placed a tender kiss on her forehead, “Baby, I’m really sorry that this happened. I was a jerk today and I feel like it’s my fault. If you need me, I’ll be down the hall.”

Bianca watched AJ leave the room and suddenly felt everything closing in around her. She felt like the most horrible person in the world at that very moment. She had never been more confused in her entire life as she turned on her left side and cried herself to sleep.

---

Nick drove home in complete silence. He felt absolutely heartbroken yet again… not to mention confused as hell. Bianca hadn’t pushed him away earlier; she’d given in to their desires as easily and completely as he had. Yet, she wouldn’t own up to the fact that there was definitely still something between them. She’d even said herself that she still loved him…

“Nick…” her voice broke with emotion. She tried to deny it for so long… “I never stopped loving you, I just stopped letting it show…”

He raked a hand through his already disheveled hair and decided that he would never understand what was going on between them. All he knew was that she was the only thing that made perfect sense in his life, and she was gone. It didn’t seem quite fair. The more he thought about it, the angrier he became. What right did she have to play these games?

As quickly as the anger flared up, he felt the hurt taking over. And as badly as he was hurting and hating Bianca at that very moment, the only question that clouded his mind was: When will I see her again? He knew he shouldn’t want to see her, but he only felt whole when they were together… Even if it only means being in the same room…

When can my heart beat again
When does the pain ever end
When do the tears stop from running over
When does "you'll get over it" begin
I hear what you're saying
But I swear that it's not making sense
So when can I see you

When can I see you again
When can my heart beat again
When can I see you again
When can I breathe once again
And when can I see you

When does my "someday" begin
When I'll find someone again
And what if I still am not truly over
What am I supposed to do then, babe...
Do you see what I'm saying
Even if, if it's not making sense
So when can I see you

When can I see you again
When can my heart beat again
When can I see you again
When can I breathe once again
And when can I see you again

Yeah, baby
Do you see what I'm saying
Even if, if it's not making sense, baby
So when can I see you again

When can I see you again
When can my heart beat again
When can I see you again
When can I breathe once again
And when can I see you again*

Brian stood in front of a mirror and ran his hand through his untidy curls. I’m way overdue for a haircut, he thought and cast a skeptical look at his unruly hair. Waaay past due. Feeling satisfied with himself, he turned and grabbed his keys making sure he hadn’t forgotten anything.

It had been two months since he and Nicole had literally run into one another in the grocery store. After they had lunch together and then dinner the next night, things seemed to pick up where they had left off. It almost seemed as though nothing bad had happened between them. He and Nicole were definitely back on in a big way, and every time someone mentioned her name he would feel himself beginning to grin like an idiot.

He was happy, but he couldn’t deny that his thoughts did wander to Julie more often than he cared to admit. He hadn’t seen or spoken to her in months and he had long since given up trying to get her to pick up the telephone. Every now and then, Brian would find himself dialing her number but he would always end the call before it even began. It just wasn’t meant to be. Shaking the thought from his head, he climbed into his car and glanced at his watch. It was only 6:39 and he had plenty of time to make it over to Nicole’s to pick her up for dinner.

***

“This is really nice,” Nicole whispered as she laced her fingers through Brian’s across the table.

He just smiled, taking in her beauty. She was stunning in a simple black dress that came off the shoulders with her hair elegantly swept up and away from her face. Her brown eyes sparkled in the candlelight and her smile warmed him to the core.

“If you don’t mind, I’m gonna go to the ladies room,” she stood up. Dropping a quick kiss on Brian’s lips her smile widened, “I won’t be gone long.”

Brian watched Nicole until she disappeared around the corner and leaned back in his chair. Tonight was perfect and would only get better, he was sure of it. After a moment the maitre d’ appeared at his side and offered a smile.

“Mr. Littrell, you have a telephone call.”

“Okay, thank you,” he nodded. “If Nicole comes back before I do, let her know where I am, okay?” He didn’t wait for an answer as he rounded the corner. Trying to figure out who would be calling, he wasn’t paying attention as he brushed past a couple on their way to a table. It wasn’t until he heard a soft “oooof” followed by an angry “excuse me” that he realized he’d more than brushed past them; he nearly knocked the woman over.

“Sorry,” he said as he turned to face them apologetically. “I wasn’t watching—” surprise registered on his face and his excuse was forgotten.

“Oh, hello Brian,” the irritation in Julie’s voice had been replaced by a cool tone.

“Julie, hi,” he didn’t know what to say. It had been so long since he’d seen or heard from her, that he didn’t know what to say. He noticed she had called him Brian which was something rare, and she was obviously not pleased to see him. He took a moment to survey her; he was glad to see that she looked well.

Julie cleared her throat and brought Brian back to earth. “This is Tyler Jenkins.”

Brian forced a smile and extended his hand, which Tyler shook firmly. He tried not to narrow his eyes as he gave Tyler the once over. He was tall—taller than him—with dark wavy hair and bright blue eyes. He’s not really her type… Clearing his throat Brian nodded to them, “It was nice meeting you, man. Good to see you, Jules.” Wanting desperately to get away from them, Brian headed back to his table completely forgetting about his phone call. He tried his best to ignore them, but still managed to hear when Tyler asked who he was. The worst part came with Julie’s nonchalant answer: “Just someone I used to know.”

---

Bianca leaned back on her king sized bed and smiled to herself. He should be coming through that door at any moment, she was sure of it. She’d left a message on his cell phone to be there as soon as possible and a note for him downstairs. Now, she was waiting patiently knowing that he would not be expecting the romantic setting when he got there.

She ran a hand through her dark hair, feeling a nervous ball forming in her stomach. Why she was starting feeling this way she didn’t know. She slid further back on the bed and adjusted the pink satin robe she was wearing. Was he going to like all of this? She was suddenly very unsure about what he was going to think. Was it too much? No, he’s going to love it.

Listening closely, she thought she heard the faint sound of the front door shutting. The nervous ball began to dissolve into a flutter of pure excitement. She was feeling much better about this now that she knew he was actually there. She smiled to herself again when she heard him ascending the stairs; it was only a matter of moments now. She heard him call her name; his voice was filled with concern.

She slid to the end of the bed and stood up when she heard him right outside of the room. Making one final adjustment to her hair and robe, she was pleased to see the surprise register on his handsome face. “Hey you.”

“Bean?” relief filled his voice followed by confusion. “The message you left made it sound like something was wrong.”

“No,” she shook her head and bit her lip. “I just wanted to see you.”

He looked as though he wanted to say something, but instead chose to keep it to himself. “Well, I should probably get going. Since you’re okay and everything…”

“Wait,” she called desperation evident in her voice.

Turning slowly, a pained expression flashed across his face. “What are you doing, Bean? What do you want?”

Bianca walked over to him and without saying a word she guided his hands to the tie on her robe. Without breaking their eye contact, she whispered in a sultry voice, “I needed to see you.” She kept her hands on his as he slipped the thin fabric from her shoulders.

“Wh-what do you want?” he asked again quietly. Though he tried, he couldn’t make himself leave.

“You, Nick. I want you. Make love to me,” she demanded gently before pressing her lips to his.

At that very moment, Bianca jerked awake and looked around the dark room. Casting a nervous glance beside her, she was filled with relief. There lay AJ, with his back to her, sound asleep and snoring lightly. “Oh dear God,” she whispered to herself and brought her hand to her eyes. Shaking the very real dream from her mind, she took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Sliding across the satin sheets, she spooned against her husband and draped her left arm across his body. As much as she tried to rid her mind of what she’d just been dreaming, it was still crystal clear. The only question she could ask herself was: why?

---

Nick stood on his deck of his Florida mansion staring out into the dark night. The tide was out and the beach seemed to stretch on forever as the silver moon hung low in the sky. Millions of stars sparkled like diamonds against the clear ebony sky. A cool breeze coming off the water occasionally ruffled his blonde hair and kissed his cheeks.

A forlorn sigh escaped Nick’s lips as he continued to gaze out at the picture perfect night. He had it all. Fame and fortune, the adoration of millions of fans, women willing to do anything for him at any time… He was never alone, yet he always felt so lonely. Empty. Staring down into the crystal glass in his hand he swirled the amber liquid inside before finishing it off.

Two months had slipped by since his world had been turned upside down. Bianca’s confession on that rainy, passion filled late September afternoon had sent his heart surging with hope. False hope. Now, here he was drowning his sorrows in Jack Daniels and wallowing in self pity. He loathed himself with every fiber of his being. What had happened to him?

His body tensed uncomfortably as the busty redhead he’d chosen for the night—Melanie…Missy… He couldn’t even remember—snaked her arms around his waist. He sneered in disgust with himself as she placed a tender kiss on his bare shoulder. As much as he hated himself at that moment, he knew he wasn’t going to break his routine tonight. He knew that after a few minutes his desire would take over and he would lead the girl upstairs and spend the rest of the night pleasuring her into oblivion only to send her packing the next morning.

It was always the same these days. After a long night of sex, the woman left with the misguided idea that he was genuinely interested in her; that he would be calling her for another date. After he was sure she was gone, he’d take a scalding hot shower trying to rid himself of the intense shame he felt. Questions plagued him and his heart ached with overwhelming loneliness as his tears mixed with the water cascading over his naked body.

Her kisses brought him out of his thoughts and back into the present. Something in the back of his mind clicked and the loathing he felt for himself intensified. He had to break the monotonous routine tonight. Not tomorrow or next week… right now. If he didn’t it would keep going and he was sure it was going to lead to his disastrous downfall. It’s time I finally let go and move on. It’s time I pick up the pieces and grow up.

Unfortunately, she had other plans for him as she turned him to face her. She placed kiss after kiss across his chest and neck—paying special attention to his collar bone. Her hands roamed his body and Nick felt himself losing control to wanton desire. Sadly, he gave into the realization that tonight would be no different from the rest…

---

Mia paced the dark room nervously while Howie lay sleeping in his king sized bed. How could two months have passed with no progress whatsoever? Mitch was growing more impatient as each day passed, but there was nothing she could do. All she knew was that eventually she was going to run out of time.

Dropping into an overstuffed chair, she began chewing on her manicured fingernail. Something had changed over the last few months and she wasn’t sure exactly what she was doing anymore. Somewhere deep in the recesses of her heart, beneath all of the armor she’d built up, she felt a vaguely familiar pang.

“What the hell is wrong with you, Mia? Get a fucking grip!” she whispered to herself. She cast a glace at Howie; he was so peaceful looking. Pushing herself back to her feet she tried to think of something she could do to rid herself of the guilt that had bubbled to the surface of her heart. She didn’t have a clever idea this time.

She had tried biding her time, but as Mitch’s patience wore thin, his anger grew. He was now calling her every day, and she was running out of excuses. Don’t make me do something I’ll regret, Mia, he spat hatefully just hours earlier. If you fuck this up, you can bet your ass that I will fuck you up. Now do your job you stupid bitch.

The callous words rushed back to her and she could feel her eyes welling up with tears. “I need to stop being such a baby and do this already,” she mumbled as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “I’m Mia Dennison for fuck’s sake.”

---

Kevin smiled as he and Tara sat on his sofa talking. It was the end of November and they had spent the day together with Chris decorating for Christmas and just having a good time. After getting all of the decorations up, Kevin invited them to stay for dinner. After a delicious home cooked meal—spaghetti and meatballs with garlic bread—they had spent the rest of the time playing with Chris until he fell asleep against Kevin’s broad chest. Now, after putting Chris to sleep in the big boy bed Kevin bought for him, he and Tara were laughing together.

“This has been a really great day,” she gushed with a genuine smile.

“It has. Chris had a really good time.”

“I’ve never seen him look so excited than when you lifted him up to put the star on top of the tree,” her eyes sparkled with emotion. “He really loves you, ya know.”

“I hope so, 'cause I’m crazy about him,” his smile faded temporarily.

Tara knew his daughter had just crossed his mind and she placed her hand over his on the back of the sofa. “She’ll come around. Just give her time.”

He shook his head sadly. “I’ve given her time, Tara. You don’t know Brianna… and to be honest, I don’t know her anymore. I used to, but that was before everything happened. She was my whole life.”

Tara’s heart ached for Kevin as she watched his emerald eyes shimmer with unshed tears. He was such a good man and she just didn’t understand why Brianna was keeping his daughter from him. “Eventually, she’ll realize what she’s doing. You’ll get your daughter back.”

“What if it’s too late?”

Tara shook her head defiantly and squeezed his hand. “Kevin, it’s never too late.”

Something was wrong. He could feel it, but he couldn’t pin point exactly what was bothering her. Each time he inquired, Bianca would smile and shake her head insisting “everything is perfectly peachy” with a bright smile before dropping a quick kiss on his full lips. Now he was watching her as she carried on an animated telephone conversation with her mother who happened to be three thousand miles away in North Carolina.

AJ leaned against the door frame and watched her intently. Before he met Bianca, he was the typical hard partying bad boy everybody expected him to be. Now, he was nothing but a big softy who was head over heels in love with his wife. She was oblivious to his soulful gaze as she tucked a strand of mahogany hair behind her ear.

He smiled, but something tugged at his insides. He wished he knew what was going on with her. He knew there had to be something bothering her because she never would have suggested they move out to California. She loved her career, but he knew perfectly well that Bianca hated Los Angeles more than anything. She didn’t mind going to L.A. for business, but she always said that she would hate living there; she was purely an East Coast girl born and raised in the South. Her soft southern drawl brought him back to the present.

“Bye Mama. I love you too,” she ended the phone call and turned. She gasped in surprise when she found AJ staring at her with a seductive smile plastered on his handsome face. “Gah, you really know how to scare the hell outta somebody, don’t ya? How long have you been there anyway?”

AJ’s smile grew wider as she busied herself with tidying the room—a habit she’d no doubt picked up from her mother. “Long enough sweet cheeks.”

Bianca rolled her eyes and leaned against the desk. She suddenly felt timid under his intense gaze and quickly tore her eyes from his, afraid that he would somehow be able to read her thoughts. That was the last thing she needed.

Noticing her discomfort, AJ frowned inwardly. Have I done something to upset her? Pushing the thought out of his mind he closed the distance between them and placed his hands on her hips. Reaching up he pushed a tendril of dark hair off her face and cupped her quivering chin. Looking into her cerulean eyes, he silently willed her to open up to him. Talk to me, baby… don’t close your heart to me. Tenderly, AJ captured her lips with his wordlessly asking her to open up to him and let go of whatever she was holding on to.

Finally, Bianca gave in to AJ with a breathless sigh. She let him pull her body closer to his as he dropped whisper soft kisses below her ear and down her neck. Squeezing her eyes shut, Bianca cursed herself. He is too good to me and I don’t deserve him… especially not after what I did…

---

Brian sat on his plush sofa absently flipping through various television channels. He raked a hand through unkempt curls, his breath coming out in a disconcerted sigh. Still, he continued to change channels choosing to ignore his uneasiness for now. Who am I kidding? Not satisfied with anything he’d seen, Brian finally clicked the television off and dropped the remote beside him.

Looking around the quiet room, Brian’s thoughts drifted back to the night before. After he’d bumped into Julie he’d become distracted and withdrawn causing Nicole to become frustrated and suggested that they head home early. Although he had been somewhat relieved when she recommended calling it a night, he couldn’t suppress the guilt he felt surge through him when he kissed her goodnight. Not because he felt bad about killing their perfect evening… it had more to do with the fact that after seeing her, all he could think about was Julie.

Now, here he was, still in the clothes he’d been wearing, feeling more confused than ever. With a hand in his pocket, he felt the black velvet box beneath his fingers. Last night was supposed to be the night he finally set the rest of his life in motion. He’d envisioned dropping to one knee in front of the entire restaurant at which point a misty-eyed Nicole would burst into full fledged tears. Smiling and nodding her acceptance while pulling him up into her embrace, the onlookers would ooh and ahh their approval as the young couple celebrated the joyous occasion.

Yet, here Brian was feeling rather dejected with himself. Nicole, he knew, was upset when she disappeared inside her house and had yet to call him. It will probably be a cold day in hell before she calls me. He glanced toward the window and saw that the morning sky was murky and gray, mirroring his attitude. Scratching his scruffy chin, he reached over and picked up the telephone dialing Nicole’s number. Might as well go ahead and clear things up now, he thought as he began to mentally prepare himself for what was coming.

---

Nick eyed Mia wearily as she sat cuddled next to Howie, a much too wide smile plastered on her pretty face. He’d been happy when Howie called to see if he wanted to hang out; it had been a while since they’d done anything together and he was looking forward to it. Until he actually got there and found out Mia would be there as well. He would never admit it to Howie, but he didn’t care much for Mia at all. She seemed a little sneaky and definitely phony. He shifted uncomfortably and looked around the spacious room trying desperately to find a topic for conversation.

He had hoped to have the chance to talk to Howie about some of the things that had been bothering him in the last couple of months, but there was no way in hell he would bring up anything in front of Mia. Howie might have been in love, but Nick didn’t trust her as far as he could throw her. In that case, I might need to trust her cause I could probably throw her scrawny ass a good distance, he smirked to himself.

“What’s so funny?” Howie questioned with an amused smile.

“Uh…nothin’. Just somethin’ I heard on the radio earlier. You know those morning deejays are funny as hell,” the lie stumbled from his mouth. He hoped it was convincing. Clearing his throat, Nick glanced back and forth between Howie and Mia. “Hey man, you wanna go get some lunch later? I kinda—”

“Ooh, that would be great, guys. I know a nice little place across town that makes the best—”

“Uh, well, no offense or anything, Mia, but I kinda have some stuff that I need to talk over with Howie. You know… guy stuff.”

Mia tried hard to hide her scowl. “Oh sure.”

“Yeah, that would be cool,” Howie added. Placing a soft kiss just above Mia’s temple, he smiled. “You don’t mind right, baby?”

“No, not at all,” she forced a smile and planted a kiss on his lips all the while shooting daggers at Nick with her eyes.

---

Bianca made sure the bedroom door was locked as she emerged from her bathroom. AJ was out and about town running some errands and tending to a few business matters, but she knew that he sometimes liked to sneak back and surprise her. She couldn’t let him do that today; she had to be prepared. Just in case. Pacing the large room, she nervously chewed on her bottom lip and checked the clock. Three more minutes. She expelled a nervous sigh and brushed her hair off her forehead.

She stopped in the bathroom doorway and cast an anxious glace at the pregnancy test lying harmlessly on the bathroom counter. Bianca knew this was something she should have done a month ago when she was obviously late and completely missed her period, but she was in denial. After she started getting sick during the day, she knew she couldn’t delay this any longer. Sure, she eventually wanted to have a family, but a baby was not exactly something she needed right now with an upcoming tour. She swallowed the lump in her throat and once again glanced at her watch. One more minute.

She had resumed pacing back and forth in front of the doorway occasionally glancing toward the counter. When the timer chimed, her breath caught in her throat and she felt as though her legs were made of lead. She wanted to look and see the results, but she was terrified as to what she would see. Short shallow breaths escaped her lungs and her heart began to pound in her chest as a nervous ball formed in the pit of her stomach. This is it…

Bianca tried once again to swallow the ever growing lump in her throat, but her mouth had gone completely dry making it impossible. With trembling hands, she reached out and picked up the pink plastic test kit. She closed her eyes momentarily and said a short prayer before looking to see the results. A gasp hitched in her throat as she stared at a pink plus sign. A plus sign… that meant…

Slowly, she walked back into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the mattress. Her hands were still shaking when she lifted the telephone from its cradle. She dialed the number she’d retrieved earlier and listened as the phone rang before a friendly voice echoed on the other end. “Dr. Wilburn’s office, this is Angela.”

“H-hi Angela, this is Bianca Parker. I need to make an appointment as soon as possible, please.”

Kevin smiled at Tara as she emerged from her vehicle and began to remove their son from his car seat. Meeting them halfway, he couldn’t contain his grin as Chris sprinted toward him as fast as his little legs would carry him. Stooping down, he scooped the toddler up into his arms and began tickling his belly. Hearing Tara’s melodic laughter, Kevin looked up and immediately frowned. She looked tired with dark circles beneath her dull hazel eyes. Her hair was swept up in an unkempt ponytail and she wore no makeup on her pale skin. He also noticed that seemed rather out of breath.

“Are you feeling okay?” he questioned her quickly. She looked like death warmed over.

Tara nodded feebly and smiled. “I’m fine. I just didn’t sleep well last night and I think I might be coming down with a cold. That’s all.”

Kevin wasn’t entirely satisfied with her answer. He’d never seen lack of sleep and a cold make a person look that run down, but he didn’t push the subject. Reaching out he took the bag she was holding and slung it over his right shoulder, while holding onto Chris with his left arm.

“So, you have everything, right? My cell phone number and my Mom’s number in Alabama?”

Kevin nodded. “I have them on the fridge. But everything will be fine so you don’t need to worry,” he winked and added, “Get some sleep maybe, but don’t worry.”

She smiled sheepishly and shrugged. “Sorry, but that comes naturally when you’re a parent. You know that.” Turning her attention to Chris she fussed over him for a moment. “Now you be good for Daddy. I’ll be home in a couple of days.”

“Bye Mommy!” Chris cried happily and leaned into her. He placed a sloppy kiss on her cheek and grinned.

“I love you, baby.” Ruffling his hair she turned to Kevin. “Thanks again for keeping him on such short notice. If you need me call me.”

“Will do,” he nodded. Giving her a quick kiss on the cheek he smiled again. “I’m serious about getting some rest. You look like crap.”

---

Breaking apart a roll, Nick glanced up at Howie who seemed very surprised at his confession. Not only surprised, he now seemed a little nervous and Nick sensed he might even be feeling slightly disappointed. Nick shifted uncomfortably in his chair noticing the tension that had settled between them.

“So… AJ doesn’t know?”

Nick shrugged and averted his eyes feeling ashamed. “I don’t think so. I mean, I’m still alive aren’t I?”

Howie remained silent for a moment. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped as if he were trying to make sure he would say the right thing. “Have you talked to her since? I mean, have you tried to sort out what happened?”

“Not since that day, no,” he shook his head. Fiddling with the cloth napkin on the table, he continued to avoid Howie’s questioning gaze. “She doesn’t want to talk about it and I can’t call her. It would be suspicious.”

Howie only nodded.

“Hey look, man, I’m sorry I just kinda dropped all of this on you. But I felt like I was gonna lose it if I didn’t talk about it.”

Howie’s attention snapped to Nick. “Don’t apologize; I’m flattered that you trusted me enough to tell me. Don’t think that I’m judging you because I’m not. I’m just trying to put myself in your shoes, but I’m having a hard time doing that. I have to be honest, man, I don’t know if I would want to be in that position.”

Just as Nick was about reply, his cell phone began to ring. Glancing at the caller ID he was more than a little surprised to see Bianca’s number flashing across the screen. He looked at Howie and excused himself from the table. “I need to take this call.” Making his way toward the bathroom, Nick stepped inside and answered the call before his voicemail picked up. “Bianca?”

On the other end, Bianca sat with her back pressed again the headboard of her bed and her knees hugged to her chest. Wiping her eyes, she tried to control her sobbing. “Nick! I’m so glad you picked up.”

His mind racing with possibilities of things that could have happened, he tried to force his heart from his throat. He had not expected to hear her sobbing uncontrollably on the other end. “Bean what happened? Are you okay? Did something happen with AJ?”

“N-no… nothing like th-that,” a cry hitched in her throat.

His breath came out in a relieved whoosh and he felt his heart beginning to resume a normal rhythm. “What happened?”

“Nick… I-I… I don’t know what t-to do!” she had been sobbing so badly that she was now beginning to hiccup.

“Okay, baby, calm down. Take a deep breath and try to tell me what’s going on, okay?”

“Mmhm.” He listened as she sucked in a deep breath, still hiccupping, and expelled it slowly. “I didn’t know who to call, Nick, but I couldn’t call AJ yet.”

“It’s okay. You know I’m here… just tell me what’s happening,” he probed gently.

She took another deep breath and tried to force back a fresh wave of tears. “Nick… I’m… I’m p-pregnant.”

Nick felt himself begin to choke, but quickly regained his composure. Clearing his throat, it was his turn to take a deep breath. “How far along are you?”

“I dunno exactly. If I had to make a guess, I’d say about seven or eight weeks.”

Nick felt the color drain from his face as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. Turning on the tap, he splashed cold water on his pale face and braced himself against the counter. “You’re sure?”

“I just took an at home test and it’s positive… no mistaking that,” her eyes welled up with unshed tears. “I called my doctor and made an appointment, but it’s really not even necessary. I’m pregnant, Nick. I know I am.”

---

Brian placed the telephone back on its cradle and nodded to himself. Talking to Nicole had gone better than he had expected and things seemed pretty normal between them. As far as he could tell, she wasn’t angry with him for the way he acted before dropping her off the night before. She did admit, with good reason, that she had been a little disappointed that the wonderful evening ended so abruptly. Still, he had a nagging feeling in his stomach. Things with Nicole may have been fine, but he felt that things with Julie were unfinished.

Once again he reached for the telephone, but this time he dialed Julie’s number. It only took three rings before she picked up.

“Hello?” her voice seemed cautious.

“Hey Jules,” he said quietly.

“Brian.”

He winced at her cool tone, but made sure he sounded unaffected. “I just wanted to call and… well, ya know… just check on you.”

“I’m fine,” she said sounding confused. “I don’t want to be rude, Brian, but why are you really calling?”

Brian sat shocked for a moment, trying to put it into words. “I… well… after last night I just… I wanted to make sure you were okay. Things felt a little unsettled last night, you know? I don’t want things to be weird between us after what happened…”

Julie absorbed his words, but remained quiet. How could things not be weird? They had already crossed that line and it’s not like they could go back and change what happened. “Well, things are fine I promise. I’ve really got to get going, but thanks for calling.”

“Jules wait!” he called although it was too late. She had ended the call.

Across town, Julie leaned against the wall cursing herself. Swiping a tear from her cheek she took a deep breath and ignored the pain swelling inside her heart.

---

Mia quietly slipped into Howie’s office after she made sure he was still in the shower upstairs. She was almost never by herself and this would be her only chance to get what she needed for Mitch. He was adamant that if she didn’t get moving with their plan, she would be sorry.

As quickly as possible, Mia began shifting through the papers that lay scattered across the large oak desk. Every so often, she would fold something up and slip it into her purse. When she felt satisfied that she had retrieved enough of what Mitch would need, she made sure everything was back in its proper place. She cast one final glance around the roomy office and nodded to herself. Mitch would be pleased.

“Hey babe,” she heard Howie call from the top of the stairs. “Since you didn’t get to join Nick and me for lunch, do you wanna go to dinner tonight?”

“Sure. That would be nice.”

“Is there a special place you’d like to go?”

“Uh… no. Anywhere we go will be special to me, baby,” she called back sweetly. “I’m gonna go back to my place to get ready, though. Do you want me to meet you back here or what?”

“I can pick you up,” Howie offered. “If you want.”

“Okay. I’ll go ahead and get going then and I’ll see you in a bit.”

Once outside in the cool air, Mia took a deep breath. She’d gotten everything they would need to pull this off and she knew Mitch would be delighted. This had to take off some of the stress he’d been putting on her for the last few weeks. Smiling to herself, Mia slipped into her car and started home. She would have to look especially good tonight since it would be her last night with Howie.

Nick was slouched in a chair by his bedroom window overlooking the beach. It was nearly dawn and he’d been sitting in the same spot for hours watching as the sky turned from black, lightening to a dull gray as clouds rolled in from the west. Absently twisting the hem of his shirt, he felt as though he had a million thoughts crowding his mind and though he was exhausted, he couldn’t bring himself to leave his spot.

Confusion and shame swept over him like the waves crashing onto the shore below. What if the baby was his? He had yet to figure that out. What if the baby was AJ’s? He felt his cheeks burn with shame as the answer to that questioned surfaced…he would be jealous. Nick scrubbed a hand over his face and tried to swallow the lump of emotion that formed in his throat. As much as he wanted to deny it, deep in his heart, hope swelled that he was the father.

The silence suddenly seemed overwhelming as he watched an early morning jogger making his way down the strand. Nick felt a surge of envy. It must be nice not to have a care in the world. For the first time in several hours, he shifted his weight and felt this stiffness beginning to settle over his body from sitting in the same position in an uncomfortable chair for so long. Leaning forward and placing his elbows on his thighs, he rubbed his burning eyes. Exhaustion swept over his body, but sleep would not come easy for him, he knew. Why bother even trying? Standing up for the first time in what he guessed was four hours Nick stretched his tired body and began to slowly pace the length of his bedroom. He glanced over at the clock on his nightstand. 5:53.

“I need a shower,” he mumbled as he stripped off his shirt and strode into the large bathroom. He reached into the shower and turned on the water before shedding his remaining clothing and stepping beneath the steady stream of hot water. He rubbed his hands over his face and then began to massage his temples. He could feel his tense muscles relaxing as the water cascaded over him and he realized that he might actually be able to get a couple hours of sleep after all. Then he would start making decisions.

When the water started to turn cool Nick finally stepped out of the shower. He wiped through the steam on the mirror and surveyed his distorted reflection; he hadn’t shaved in a couple of days and was now sporting a noticeable five o’clock shadow. There were also dark circles beneath his dull blue eyes. Disgusted with himself, he turned away from the image staring back at him; the man in the mirror wasn’t him anymore…just someone who resembled him. Someone he hated.

After pulling on a pair of boxers, Nick slipped between the covers of his king sized bed. He felt himself relax completely and he willed his body to give in to the warmth that was enveloping his mind and lulling him into a deep slumber. He felt a faint smile tugging at his lips when an image of Bianca crossed his mind and before he knew it, sleep had finally taken him.

---

Bianca neatly folded another sweater and placed it inside her suitcase before pulling the zipper closed and lifting it from the bed and placing it next to the door. Her flight would be leaving in just a couple hours and she had to remind herself to take enough winter clothing. She was scheduled to sing the National Anthem at the Carolina Panthers football game on Sunday, but she was leaving early to spend time with her family.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you? It’s not too late for me to get a flight,” AJ said as he entered the room.

Bianca smiled as he slipped his arms around her waist and shook her head. “No, I understand that you have things going on here, baby. Plus, I’ll be fine. It’s no big deal.”

“Well, I’ll miss you,” he murmured against her hair. He dropped a soft kiss on top of her head with a sigh. “Let me know if you change your mind.”

Bianca turned around in his arms and smiled up at him. She absently traced one of the tattoos on his arm before leaning into him completely. Closing her eyes, she felt a rush of guilt; something she felt quite often when she was with AJ. “I will, but I promise you I’ll be fine. I’m not telling you that you can’t come with me, baby. I just know that you have things scheduled here that are important. Besides, it’s only for a few days.”

“You’re right.”

“I know,” she grinned.

Giving her another squeeze, AJ reluctantly released his hold on Bianca and sat down on his side of the bed. He watched as she made her way back and forth between her backpack and the bathroom. Glancing over at the nightstand, he saw that there was an old message still on the answering machine. He lingered over the delete button for a moment and he decided to listen to the message just in case Bianca left it for him to hear.

Bianca, this is Doris from Dr. Wilburn’s office. I was just calling to let you know that we have the results of your blood test back. If you could, please give me a call at your convenience. Thank you.

AJ looked up to see Bianca staring at him wide eyed. Dr. Wilburn’s office? He wasn’t an expert when it came to all of Bianca’s doctors, but he was pretty certain that Dr. Peter Wilburn was an OB/GYN. Shaking his head, he replayed the message in his mind and then looked back at his wife. “Bean? What blood test?”

Bianca offered a nervous smile and quickly dropped her toiletries in her bag before taking a seat next to AJ. Running a hand through her hair, she looked down at her feet and slowly lifted her gaze to meet his questioning brown eyes. “Well…see…”

AJ waiting patiently for her to find the right words for her explanation, but his patience was quickly fading. “Bianca, could you please let me in on your little secret?”

Oh god. He looked disappointed and hurt. This was killing her, but she didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t planned on telling AJ just yet. Just in case… “Well, baby, I was gonna surprise you when I got home since I just found out today,” she felt sick as the lie tumbled effortlessly from her lips. “I wanted us to be able to celebrate and all…”

AJ looked shocked for a moment, but remained quiet. He silently urged her to continue because he wanted to hear her say it. He needed to hear it.

“Baby, I’m…we’re…pregnant.” Bianca watched as a mix of emotions crossed his face. She wasn’t able to tell what his reaction would be right away.

“Pregnant?” he asked in a quiet voice. “We’re seriously gonna have a baby?”

She only nodded. Oh god, he’s not happy about it. He’s upset. Oh god. What am I gonna do?

Suddenly, AJ jumped up and pulled her into his arms, swinging her around delightedly. “We’re gonna have a baby? Oh my god, we’re gonna have a baby! I’m gonna be a daddy!” he cried joyously and dropped to his knees in front of her. Lifting her shirt, he placed a kiss on her bare belly and nuzzled his face into her skin. “Hey, Lil Bit, it’s your Daddy…”

Bianca squeezed her eyes shut and forced back the tears that were threatening to spill onto her cheeks. She ran her hands through his short hair and sighed. What am I gonna do if this is Nick’s baby?

***

This is Nick. Leave a message.

Bianca took a deep breath and tried to think of what to say. “It’s me. Give me a call tonight after about 7 your time. I’m on my way home, but I need to talk to you about something.”

“Are you ready?” AJ asked. He had a permanent grin on his face and seemed to be absolutely glowing. “Who was that?”

“Oh, just calling Holly to let her know I would be back home for a few days.” Another lie and another wave of nausea. “But yeah, I’m ready.” She smiled and turned off her cell phone; she didn’t want to take any chances that Nick would call while she was with AJ. She would never be able to lie her way out of that one.

---

Howie looked up from his desk when his telephone rang, expecting to see Mia’s name on his caller ID. He felt a pang of disappointment when he saw that it was Kevin. “Hello?” he answered.

“Hey, how are you man?” Kevin asked.

He suppressed a sigh and thought over the question. “I’m okay. Busy, but okay. What about you? Is Chris still with you?”

“I’m great actually. Yeah, Chris is still here. Tara won’t be back for another couple of days, so it’s just him and me. That’s why I was calling…I thought if you weren’t doing anything you’d wanna catch a movie with us or something. I know you have Mia and all, but man, I need some grown up time. I love spending time with Chris, but I just caught myself groovin’ to Barney. Something like ‘Finding Nemo’ I can deal with, but Barney? I’m way too macho for that.”

Howie laughed at Kevin’s honesty and mulled over the offer. Mia hadn’t called him all day and she wasn’t answering her home phone or her cell phone. He’d left one message on both voicemails telling her to call him, but he wouldn’t leave any more. She was a big girl, and he knew she was probably just relaxing. She had been feeling a lot of stress from her job in the last few weeks, and she was probably just spending some quality time with herself and the girls. Besides, they weren’t a clingy couple who had to check in with one another every second of every day and he would have his cell phone with him if she did call.

“Sure, I’m up for it. What movie should we see?”

“Man, I don’t care. Chris is amazingly attentive when it comes to watching television so as long as it’s something geared toward him, he’ll be happy. And as long as there are no purple dinosaurs, I’ll be perfectly happy.”

Howie laughed aloud, but couldn’t help but agree. That would be one for the rumor mill: two ex-Backstreet Boys taking a toddler to see a giant purple dinosaur that sings? Yeah… people would definitely speculate their sexual preferences after that one. “I’ll meet you in an hour or so.”

“Sounds good. Chris is already excited,” Kevin laughed. “See ya in while.”

---

If you love someone…

Brian paced back and forth in front of the hospital entrance. He probably looked like some crazed lunatic because he had been mumbling to himself the entire time. He knew Julie was working tonight because he’d seen her car when he passed the hospital earlier. After going inside to see if she was still there, he found out she was on her lunch break and he’d just missed her. His breath caught in his throat when he saw her car entering the staff parking lot.

“Get a grip on yourself, Brian,” he grumbled causing an older lady to give him an odd look.

“Brian? What are you doing here?”

Brian abruptly stopped pacing at the sound of her voice. What am I doing here? Good question. He suddenly couldn’t think of a good reason to give her, so he decided that he might as well offer the truth. “Do you have a few minutes before you have to get back to work? I thought it might be good to talk.”

Julie sighed. She didn’t really feel much like talking, but she couldn’t exactly turn him away after he’d tracked her down at work. She knew how he hated hospitals. She gave Brian a curt nod and motioned for him to follow her, but didn’t say anything. Passing by the triage station, Julie opened the door and looked at the heavy set nurse currently taking someone’s vitals. “Gail, I’ll be just a few extra minutes, okay?”

“Sure thing, hon. I brought my dinner tonight, so you take your time,” the older woman smiled sweetly.

“Thanks,” Julie smiled appreciatively. Turning to Brian she said, “Follow me.”

Brian remained quiet as they entered the lounge and Julie walked over to a locker. He wasn’t sure what to say or if she even wanted to speak to him. He almost got the feeling that she only agreed so he would leave her alone.

“Look, Brian, I’m not trying to be rude, but I’m at work. Gail told me to take my time, but I would feel awful if I kept her from going to lunch for too long.”

“No, I understand completely. I…uh…I’ll be honest. I don’t know exactly what it is I want to say to you, but I just feel like there is a lot of tension between the two of us. We’ve never had that before, and I don’t like it at all.”

Ya think? “Brian, I don’t like tension either, but… ever since… it’s just different now. Things change. People move on. Obviously, we both have.”

No, we both haven’t. “But I feel like we need to resolve the matter, Jules.”

“What is there to resolve, Brian? Things are fine.”

“Do you really believe that?”

“Yes,” she mentally kicked herself for sounding weak.

Brian felt his shoulders slump when he realized she wasn’t going to answer any differently. “Well, I guess I should get going so you can get back to work,” he took a step toward the door. He hesitated for a moment contemplating the words he wanted to say to her. “I don’t know why you ran, Jules, but I wish you hadn’t. I don’t for one second regret what happened between us, and I really believed that we could have made us work. I genuinely believed that.”

Julie choked back a sob, but did not turn to face Brian. When she heard the lounge door close and she knew he was gone, she finally let herself break down. She couldn’t stand how hurt he sounded, but it was for the best. But she couldn’t help but wonder why, if it was the best thing for them, it hurt so much.

…Let them go.

Bianca stepped off the plane and smiled when she saw her family waiting for her. They were standing together talking happily and hadn’t noticed that people were emerging from the terminal, but it only took a second before they realized she was standing before them. Her mother threw her arms around her daughter, squeezing the breath out of her. Stepping back, Bianca looked at her mother and smiled before placing a warm kiss on her cheek. She laughed when her brother spun her around and lifted her from the ground in a big bear hug.

“Welcome home, brat!” he laughed and placed her back on the ground. His welcome didn’t end there as he placed her in a loose headlock and proceeded to give his little sister a noogie.

“Hunter! Don’t ever mess with a diva’s hair!” a familiar voice called from behind Bianca’s mother. Bianca turned and found Holly standing with her hands on her hips and a playful smirk plastered on her pretty face. “Cause you do know she’s a diva!"

“Hey!” Bianca cried and the two friends threw their arms around one another. Feeling a pang of guilt, Bianca gave Holly a squeeze and whispered “I’m sorry for being such a bitch.”

“No sweat, girl. I don’t take you seriously anyway.”

“So, tell us how things are going,” Shirley linked her arm through Bianca’s and smiled. “I want to know all about big city life out in California.”

“It’s busy, but I’m glad to be home, Mama.”

“And where is that husband of yours? Shouldn’t he be traveling with you? I mean, it’s not like he has a job anymore,” Hunter deadpanned as they made their way to baggage claim to round up Bianca’s luggage.

“You’re so sensitive, bro. Really. And you wonder why I never bring him home?” she rolled her eyes.

“Hey, I’m just being honest. Would you prefer me to lie instead?” he asked as he lifted her suitcase from the conveyer belt.

“No, Hunter, I’d just prefer it if you’d be nice to my husband.”

“Y’all stop fighting,” Shirley drawled sternly.

Obeying her mother, Bianca pulled her cell phone from her pocket and powered it on. The voicemail notification came up immediately and she felt a knot form in her stomach. Dialing in the number she listened to the robotic recording, following its prompts until she was in her mailbox. You have three new voicemail messages and four saved messages. To play your messages press one. Bianca pressed the button and listened.

“Hey baby. I know you’re not home yet, but I wanted to call and leave you a message just because. I miss you already and can’t wait till you come home. Call me tonight when you get in. I love you.”

Bianca felt a pang of guilt followed by a rush of longing. She didn’t realize she would be homesick if she was coming home. But then again, this wasn’t home anymore, was it? AJ was home, and right now, all she wanted was to be with him. She missed the smell of his cologne and the tickle of his facial hair when he kissed her neck. Most of all, she missed how she felt in his arms. Saving the message, she pressed the button to go to the next.

“Bianca, it’s Matt. Duh, you knew that, right? Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I won’t be getting to North Carolina until Saturday. I’ll meet you at the stadium at 2:00. Be good until I get there, okay? Call if you need anything.”

Bianca only laughed and deleted this message, going to the last.

“Bean…hey. I know you said to call after 7, but your message kinda got me worried. It’s a little after… 4 here. I hope everything’s okay. Call me as soon as you get this message, okay?" There was a long pause and Bianca thought Nick had ended the call. She was about to delete the message when she heard Nick take a deep breath. "I love you, Bianca."

She sucked in a deep breath and her finger lingered over the button to delete the message. She changed her mind at the last second and chose to save the message instead then flipped her phone shut. Looking at her family she smiled. “Okay, y’all I’m starving after that long ass flight. Let’s go get something to eat.”

They all agreed and she followed them out to her brother’s car. She sighed and climbed into the backseat next to Holly who broke the silence. “So, Mrs. Diva, where are we gonna eat? You know you need to use some of your celebrity status to get us free food tonight, right?”

“I second that,” Hunter called loudly as he started the car.

“You two should be ashamed,” Shirley said shaking her head. She tried to sound stern, but Bianca saw the smile on her mother’s face.

“Hey, I’m just the passenger tonight. You pick the place and I’ll work my magic,” she said with a wink.

***

Bianca sighed to herself and flopped across the full sized bed she slept in all through high school and looked around the room. It still looked the same as it did before she moved out. Hunter had just dropped Bianca and her mother off at home. She was happily stuffed from a wonderful dinner and ready to sleep, but first she wanted to call AJ and check on him. Flipping open her cell phone, she hit the speed dial for home and listened as the phone began to ring. She checked the time; it would only be 7:30 in L.A. She was startled by AJ’s soft voice.

“Hey baby.”

“Hey handsome,” she said savoring his voice. “I miss you.”

“Ditto. This house is huge without you. I’d been wandering around all day trying to figure out what to do, so I finally decided to go grocery shopping, and boy was that an experience. You shoulda seen me!”

Bianca laughed at the image he created in her mind and again felt the twinge homesickness. “I bet you were a sight, huh? Did you even know what to do without me there?”

He feigned offense. “I’ll have you know, it only took me twenty minutes to figure out how to work the U-Scan.”

“Well, babe, you’ve got one up on me then, cause I never use that damn thing.”

AJ laughed out loud, but then grew quiet. “I love you, you know? I can’t wait for you to come home. Or...” he paused for a moment, “I could always catch a flight out there.”

“Aww, Aje I love you, too. And you don’t have to do that because it’s only a few more days… I’m flying back to L.A. on Sunday afternoon. And then we’ll be able to hole up in the house for days and days… just the two of us. I can’t wait.”

“And neither can I,” he growled. After a quiet moment, he sighed reluctantly, “Well, sexy, I know you must be exhausted so go get some sleep. Rub your belly and tell Lil Bit I love him, okay?”

Bianca felt her eyes begin to burn when he said this and smiled despite herself. “You’re gonna be such a great Daddy. I love you so much.”

“Back at ya, Bean,” his voice broke with emotion. “I’ll call you tomorrow. Night sweetheart.”

“G’night.”

Bianca listened as AJ ended the call and swallowed the lump in her throat. She took a deep breath and bit her lip as she dialed Nick’s number. She brought the phone back to her ear and waited for him to answer. After four rings she heard his answering machine pick up and she contemplated leaving a message, but decided she would call his cell phone first. If he didn’t answer, she’d call back and leave a message on his home answering machine.

After dialing the number, it started clicking and she thought it was going to go straight to voicemail, but suddenly it began to ring. Two rings in, she heard his familiar voice.

“I didn’t think you were gonna call back,” he said matter-of-factly.

“Hello to you, too, Nick.”

“Sorry, I’ve just been really worried. Your message really did make me think something was wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong, Nick. I didn’t have a chance to call before now because I was with my family. Call me crazy, but I just don’t think they would understand why I would be calling my ex.”

“Did you call me just to fight? Because if you did, then I think we need to go ahead and end the call now, Bean. You don’t need to be stressed out because it’s not good for the baby.”

Tears once again sprang to her blue eyes and she took a shaky breath. Reaching up, she pinched the bridge of her nose and squeezed her eyes shut. “I didn’t call just to fight. I had a purpose. I wanted to talk to you about… about the baby. I’m not proud to say this, but we both know that I don’t know for sure if the baby is AJ’s or if the baby is yours so I was wondering if you would mind having a paternity test. It’s not like I can ask AJ to do it, you know? I was thinking maybe I could fly to Florida and we could go to a doctor there. I don’t really want to use my doctor because of AJ. I just don’t know when we could schedule a time to do this, but it should be soon. I’m two months now, and according to what I’ve read this is a good time.”

“Yeah, well you could do that. Or…” he trailed off.

“Or what? Do you have a better idea?” Bianca snapped before she could stop herself. Closing her eyes again she frowned. “Sorry, Nick. I’m just really worried.”

“What I was gonna say is we can figure this out in the morning when I get there.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re… wait! What? When you get where?!”

“North Carolina.”

“North Carolina? Are you insane, Nick? You can’t come here!”

“Well, too bad Bean cause I’m about halfway there. As soon as I got your message today, I packed a bag and jumped in the car and I’ve been driving ever since. So, I’ll be there in about five or six hours I would guess.”

“Nick! I’m serious, how are we going to explain this?”

“We’ll figure it out,” he said quietly. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

Bianca was about to protest just when he ended the call. Fighting the urge to scream, she quickly dialed his number again, but this time it did go straight to voicemail. “Ugh, the bastard turned off his phone!” Angrily, she turned hers off and tossed it to the chair on the other side of the room and fell limply to the mattress. “Oh God, what am I gonna do?”