“November 13th, 2005

It’s an ordinary Sunday… not much for us to do than to sit here on this god damn bus and wait to arrive at our next destination. Shit, we’ve been to so many places and done so many things, I can’t even remember where we’re making our way to right now! All I know is that AJ is sleeping in my damn bunk, and I’m stuck out here, sitting in this small dining area, looking at the TV, who is in return watching Kevin slowly drift to sleep! I swear… that Kentucky man and his damn old western movies!

I can’t help than to chuckle, his head is slowly falling back, and every now and then, he would jerk his head forward, open his eyes and continue watching the movie. But before you know it… his head is lolling back once again! It’s quite funny to tell you the truth… hopefully he’ll just sleep out here so I can take his bunk… that would be great!

Why can’t I take AJ’s bunk might you ask? Well… being the nice dumbass I am, I decided to let my brother be apart of our tour! We were looking for opening acts, and so I said, “Hey… why don’t Aaron open for us?” and they agreed! At that time, Aaron wasn’t ready to tour, so he didn’t have a tour bus to travel with, and… you can pretty much figure out the rest of the story! We had to share our tour bus with him, stupid AJ decided to give up his bunk for God knows why, and he was supposed to take the sofa out here in the living room… but nooo… he decided to take my bunk instead.

Anyway… why the hell am I swearing so much? It’s not like I’m mad at the fact… sure, I’m irritated, maybe even agitated, but I’m not angry! Well… I’m getting tired now… I’m gonna hurry my ass up and jump into Kevin’s bunk before he awakes… *hehe*…”

He closed his hard cover journal book and had swiftly but quietly rose from where he was seated. He slowly passed in front of Kevin, whose eyes were half open, half closed. Nick stood there for a while, waving his hand back and forth, making sure that Kevin was out for the count. When he realized that he wasn’t going to get a response, he continued his journey to the bunks.

When he passed by his own bunk, he stopped for a while to stare at the sleeping form which was occupying his space. Without thinking or mercy, he chucked his book at the body, snickering when he heard AJ mutter “mother fucker” under his breath.

Hopefully he’ll wake up and read all the nasty things I had to say about him… Nick thought to himself as he climbed onto Kevin’s bunk, which was above Howie’s. He settled in and had drawn the curtains close, closing his eyes and allowing the darkness to engulf him for once. But just as fast as he closed his eyes, he found them snapping open again, and he felt the bus swerving from left to right. Before he could even jump out of the bunk to see what was going on, he was thrown forward off the bunk due to the impact of something slamming into the side of their bus.

He gasped when he felt the wind being knocked out of his lungs and had cried out when he felt a stinging sensation burst through his forehead. He placed his fingers above his brow and had winced when he felt his fingers come in contact with his warm blood.

“What the fuck is going on?!?” AJ shouted as he tore the bunk curtains open. He looked around and had seen Nick on the ground. He would’ve laugh, thinking Nick had rolled off the bunk bed once again, but the blood that was pouring from his forehead told him otherwise.

“What in the hell happened to you?” AJ had asked him, but Nick was still disoriented to say anything.

When he realized that he wasn’t going to receive an answer, he took it upon himself to get up and get Nick a washcloth to stop the bleeding. “Um… stay here, I’ll go get something to get that cleaned up!”

Nick had watched as AJ began to make his way towards the back of the bus, to the bathroom. All of a sudden, something had slammed into the bus yet again, causing it jerk right and swerve slightly off the road. AJ was tossed off guard, crashing into the side of the bus.

“What the hell is going on up there?” AJ had asked as he tried to regain his balance.

Nick had noticed that AJ wasn’t looking at him when he asked the question, so he turned back to see who he was referring the question to. There Kevin stood in the door way, a small, barely visible cut on his forehead.

“Someone’s trying to run us off the road…” Kevin replied as he cautiously made his way towards Nick, who was still on the ground. “You alright?”

Nick was finally able to gain his comprehension back. “Yeah… I think so… but, what happened to you?”

“I was thrown forward and had slammed my forehead into the corner of the TV stand.” Kevin explained. “And I’m taking it that you were thrown from the bunk?”

“What gave it away?” Nick had replied sarcastically. “I really don’t know how Howie and Bri can sleep through this shit!”

“Rok comes to a surprise to me, but D. … he doesn’t surprise me at all, that man can sleep through an atomic bomb. Who you should be thinking about is Aaron…”

Nick had totally forgotten that Aaron was on the same bus as them. Kevin had rose from the ground, stretching his hand out. Nick had took his outstretched hand and had allowed Kevin to pull him to his feet. “I’ll check up on Aaron… just make sure that D. and Rok’s alright.”

Nick nodded and had reached up towards the bunk that was across from the bunk he had fallen out of. He pulled the curtains open and had seen that Brian was still sleeping, his back facing him. Just as he reached out to wake Brian, whatever it was that was trying to run them off the road had succeeded, running their bus right off the road.

Nick was pressed into the bunk, and he could feel Howie’s body slam into the back of his legs, causing his knees to buckle. From there on, he felt the bus fall sideways down a hill and darkness had engulfed him once again, and this time for good.

His eyes drifted open again, a feeling of déjà vu washing over him. But instead of waking up in his bunk, he woke up to find himself laying on top of the bunk that was across from him. He tried to move, but an unbearable pain had exploded through his whole body, something was on top of his back, pinning his body into the bunk.

The lights that once lighted the bus was now flickering, causing the painful effect of walking through a club with a strobe light going off and on. He looked forward and seen Brian still lying within his bunk, but instead he was lying on his back.

“Brian…” Nick tried to call out, but his voice was gurgled out by blood which was now flooding his mouth.

He spat it out onto the bunk before him, the blood mixed with saliva now staining the sheets. He tried to move again, but froze when he realized what kind of position they were in. He remembered trying to wake Brian up, and then the bus falling sideways. He then remembered Howie rolling out of his bunk and knocking into his lower legs, which only meant that the bus was resting on it’s right side.

He felt something, more like someone shift beneath him. “Howie?” he called out.

Silence was all that came in return, but it was long till Howie responded. “Nick… I’m here man!”

Nick sighed in relief. “Are you alright D.?”

Howie took a deep breath in and shuddered, “I don’t really know… I can’t move.”

Nick continued to look around at his surroundings, thinking of a way to escape. “Look, it’s the bunks that’s pinning us here. What we need to do is try to push the bunks back to it’s original position.”

Both Howie and Nick began to push the bunks back, but their attempts failed. Nick had forgotten that the bus was resting on it’s right side, which would make it impossible for them to move the bunks anywhere.

“Hey Nick… this is what we gotta do… I need you to push the bunks back again and hold it back as long as you can, okay? Meanwhile, I’m gonna crawl out from where I am. I’ll then hold the bunks back while you grab Brian and you both get out, okay?”

Nick nodded and began to shove the bunks back again. As soon as Howie felt the cramped space open, he began to crawl quickly to the other side. Nick yelped when he felt a hot pain shoot through his back, and Howie felt the bunks slowly begin to smash him again because Nick was losing his strength.

“Whatever you do Nick… just hold those bunks back, please… I’m almost there man, just hold on for a little longer, okay?”

Nick nodded, not able to acknowledge him. Howie began to crawl even quicker, until he got to the other side. He wasn’t sure of the injuries he sustained, it was as if he could feel a thing. But as soon as he pulled himself up, he gasped at the sight. The bus was severed open, meaning that the back part of the bus was somewhere else. All Howie could do was pray that AJ, Kevin and Aaron was near the front of the bus when the crash happened.

“Howie… D., what’s going on man? Are you okay?”

Howie turned back towards Nick, “Yeah… I’m fine… the whole back part of the bus is gone though.”

“WHAT?!?” Nick had all of a sudden screamed. Howie’s face turned pale and his blood ran cold… it was as if he had felt his heart just drop out from his chest. “NO… NO… NO… FUCK NO… HOWIE, I NEED YOU TO SEE WHERE THE BACK PART OF THE BUS IS!!!”

Nick was completely freaking out now, and Howie knew why. He had the strangest feeling that Kevin, AJ and Aaron happened to be near the back of the bus when the accident happened, and Nick had only proven his suspicions to be correct.

“No Nick… I need to get you and Brian out of here first, then we’ll go check on them.” Howie had tried to say, but was interrupted by him.

“No… you need to go see where the hell the back of the bus is! AJ and Kevin was in the back of the bus! Just please Howie… do it, please!”

It had hurt Howie to hear Nick beg him in such a way. If he could, he would go look for the back part of the bus, but there was no way in hell he would leave Nick and Brian here by themselves. “We’ll look for them as soon as I get you and Brian outta here…”

There was no point in arguing with him. Nick began to shake Brian, trying to see if that would wake him up. “Brian… c’mon man, wake up.” As Nick continued to shake his still form, Brian’s head had rolled to the side, and Nick slightly gasped. There was a large and deep gash that ran across his forehead, his head must’ve slammed on the inside of his bunk when the bus had crashed.

“Shit man… he’s out for the count!” Nick had informed Howie.

Howie remained silent for a while, thinking of what they should do. “Alright, your gonna have to get him outta there, wedge him between the bunks and walk him out. Can you do that?”

Nick stared at Brian’s unconscious form, “Wait… if he’s injured, aren’t we like… not suppose to move him? I mean, we don’t know what kind of injuries he sustained, and if it’s something major, we could paralyze him if we move him.”

“Well, it’s either we leave him here to die or pull him out, your choice!”

Nick had glanced at Howie for a while, and then had looked back at Brian. “Pull the bunks apart…” was all Nick said in reply.

Howie nodded and had pushed the bunk to the side, as far as it would allow him to go. Cautiously, Nick had grabbed Brian’s body and began pulling him out of the bunk. Howie winced as he felt his muscles being strained under the weight of their bunks. Someone, anyone remind me to tell management to construct wooden, light weight bunks for our new bus! Howie thought to himself, So incase we decide to get into anymore bus accidents, the bunks won’t be such a problem!

As soon as Nick was able to wedge Brian between the bunks, he froze. “How do I do this now?”

“Think of a way, anyway… just please, hurry up!”

Nick just lifted Brian’s body up partially and began walking him down the isle, towards Howie. As soon as they got towards the end, Howie had released the bunks, heaving for air, and Nick had placed Brian down on the little ground they had left.

As soon as Nick turned to survey the damage, he gasped. The whole back part of the bus was gone and was nowhere in sight. Both AJ and Kevin were near the back of the bus at that time. He looked up and noticed that one of the bunks was severed in half… AJ’s bunk. If AJ was in that bunk… God knows what would’ve happened to him! Nick thought to himself, but then something had hit him… reality had hit him so hard, he began to hyperventilate. AJ wasn’t in his bunk… because he was sleeping in my bunk! AJ was in my bunk because Aaron was in his bunk! Aaron was sleeping in AJ’s bunk when the crash happened!

“AARON!!!” Nick shouted and was about to jump out of the bus, but Howie had stopped him.

“Nick, what in the hell are you doing?” Howie had asked him as he continued to hold his struggling form. “We will go find them as soon as we all get off this side of the bus, but we can’t have you jumping off into god knows where like an idiotic fool!”

Nick started to cry hysterically. “You don’t understand… and look at this fucking bunk!” he pointed to AJ’s bunk. “It’s cut in half… AJ wasn’t in that fucking bunk, Aaron was! I need to find them…”

Howie tightened his grip on Nick, but he was able to rip away, and he jumped off. “Nick!” Howie shouted at him, but when he looked out, he Nick standing below him.

“Stay here and watch Brian… I’ll go look for Kev, Jay and Aaron…”

Before Howie could say anything, Nick began to walk away, deeper into wherever they were. “Shit…” Howie silently swore to himself.

Nick continued to walk through the woods, keeping his eyes open for the back part of the bus in the blinding dark. He looked down a little further into the hills and spotted something rather large. He skidded down the hill towards it and realized that it was the back of the bus.

“Aaron!” Nick had shouted, walking inside the half back part of the bus. “Kevin!”

Nick stopped when he felt his foot come in contact with someone’s hand. He looked down and seen Kevin wedged between the mangled bunks. Unlike the upper part of the bus, where the bunks were intact, these bunks were busted and all over the creation.

“Kevin…” Nick knelt down towards him, surveying the damage done to him. There wasn’t much he could see, the only thing that was visible was the dark crimson blood that stained his face.

He heard twigs snapping in the forest, as if someone had followed him. He could feel eyes watching him, as if watching to see if he made another move. He could feel their presence looming above him, sensing that whoever it was would strike if he made another move.

Nick quickly rose and whirled around, and he gasped. “Damnit D., didn’t I tell you to stay up there with Brian?”

“Brian’s fine, where could he possibly go?” Howie replied. “It’s them we need to worry about.”

Before Nick could say anything, something, more like someone had wrapped their arms around Howie’s waist, hoisting him into the air. Nick continued to stare at the man who was holding Howie captive.

“One more step and I’ll blow his fucking brains out!” shouted the man.

Nick rose his hands in surrender, staring at Howie to make sure he was holding up okay. “Get in that bus…” the man demanded.

Nick hesitated, but sprung into action when the man’s grip on Howie tightened and he fingered the trigger. As soon as Nick had turned his back to walk into the bus, he heard a sickening slap sound that made him turn around.

When he turned around, he had seen Howie lying on the floor, unconscious, and the man was standing above him, aiming his gun at him. Nick lunged himself towards the man, but the only thing he received was a kick in the face. As soon as he dropped to the ground, he could feel the man continue to beat the living shit out of him, only to have everything, mostly his senses, fade away from him.

His eyes fluttered open, everything coming in as a blur to him at first. He looked around the dark room he was in, why couldn’t he remember anything? He looked down at his wrist and noticed that there were wires hooked up to him, IV’s to be exact. The scenario of him going through heart surgery played through his head, but there was no possible way of that happening. He already had heart surgery 7 years ago, he wasn’t reliving the past, nor was he dreaming. He was in the hospital for a different reason, but why?

He tried to move his right hand, but he noticed that someone else’s hand was on top of his. He looked down to his side and seen a blonde woman resting her head by his side, he hand on top of his. He tried once more to move it, seeing if he could wake the young woman up, and he succeeded.

The young woman opened her eyes, staring at the blank wall. She could’ve sworn that she felt something; more like someone move her hand. She slowly rose her head and had turned to look, seeing her husband’s eyes open and alert.

“Oh my God…” she cried out, tears spewing from her fatigued eyes. “Brian…” was all that she could say as she grabbed his hand and held it to her face.

Brian continued to stare at her, his face slightly taking on a puzzled look. Why was she crying? Brian had thought to himself. She looked up once more and had continued to hold his hand, feeling that if she let go, she would lose him for good this time.

“Baby… Bri babe, can you talk? Can you say something?”

Brian continued to stare at her, wondering what to say and why he couldn’t respond so quickly to her question. “What happened?” was all that came out, and his eyes widened. His voice was so low, almost taking the octave of AJ’s low and raspy voice, but deeper and scratchier.

Leighanne hesitated for a while, she wasn’t sure if she should tell him now or wait till later. She didn’t know how he would react and if he would be strong enough to receive such devastating information. Brian just stared at her, waiting for her response. “Tell me…” he whispered, moving his hand so that he now held her hand, and he gave it a gentle squeeze.

Leighanne busted into tears once again, she didn’t have the heart to tell him, but he needed to know. “You guys were involved in a serious bus accident. The tire of your guys’ bus popped and the driver lost control of the vehicle. When the paramedics and police arrived at the scene, they discovered that the accident caused your guys bus to be severed in half… you were the only one located near the front of the bus, where there was little to no damage done. Unfortunately, the rest of the fellas weren’t so lucky. They were all located in the back when the bus crashed.”

This caught Brian’s attention. He wasn’t expecting to hear this. He sat up a little straighter in his bed, regretting it as the pain hit him seconds later. “Are they alright?”

Leighanne just stared at him through glassy eyes, staying silent. No… this can’t be happening. Brian thought. “I… I don’t know much. Howie, Kevin, AJ and Nick are okay… Aaron… isn’t… he isn’t…”

She began to stutter. Brian’s eyes widened, what was she trying to say? Why couldn’t she get it out? “Aaron… what about Aaron? What happened to him?”

Before Leighanne could say anything, someone had opened the door and had peered in through the crack. Both Leighanne and Brian turned to see his father, Harold standing by the door. As soon as he opened the door the rest of the way, his mother Jackie and his brother Harold also stood there, with little Baylee in Harold’s arms.

“My baby…” Jackie had whispered as she began to make her way towards Brian’s bed. She cupped his face and had planted a kiss on his forehead, staying there for a while. “I was sooo afraid that you weren’t gonna come back to us.” she had whispered into his ear.

Brian closed his eyes, realizing how close he was to losing his life, again. He had to stop putting his family into this predicament, where he basically put them on edge because his life was on a balance.

Both his father and brother stood behind Jackie, watching silently. Little Baylee began to bob up and down in Harold’s arms, antsy to get down. “Hold it little buddy… I can’t let you down here, there’s too much dangerous stuff around.” Harold said as he hiked him up with one arm. “Did you say hi to daddy?”

“Hi daddy!” Baylee wailed, waving his hand by opening it and closing it.

Brian smiled, his eyes getting watery. “C’mere little man…”

Harold had walked forward to place Baylee down onto the hospital bed. As soon as he had set him down, Baylee began to crawl towards Brian, and both Leighanne and Jackie had to move the wires of the IV so Baylee wouldn’t pull it out of Brian’s arm by accident. “Daddy… do you have an owie?” Baylee had asked him, pointing to his bandaged head.

Brian had felt his wrapped, bandaged head for the first time. “Yeah… daddy got beat up pretty good… but not to worry, daddy will be up and outta here in no time!”

Baylee crawled up a little further and had planted a wet kiss on Brian’s cheek. “I love you daddy…”

Brian closed his eyes as a single tear seeped out. “I love you too kiddo…”

Jackie had scooped little Baylee into her arms. “Well, we better get going… there’s only so much people that can be in one room at the same time. Leighanne, you should go home and get some rest…”

Leighanne had looked up, “No, it’s alright Jackie… I’ll be fine, Brian and I have a few things to talk about.”

Brian looked over at Leighanne, clueless by what she meant by that. He turned and had looked back towards his mother who had his son in her arms. “We’ll be back tonight sweetie…” Jackie said as she leaned down to kiss Brian once more on the forehead. Little Baylee kissed him at the same time to. “Bye daddy!”

Brian waved to him, “Bye Baylee… be good for grandma!”

His father was next in line, and he just stood there, glancing him over. He leaned down and had gently embraced him in a hug. “Glad your back sonny…” he whispered before he rose and had walked back to where his wife stood with his grandson.

His brother, Harold, was the last. He just stared at him, kind of the same way his father had stared at him, and he began to shake his head. “What do you prefer, a handshake or a kiss?”

Brian chuckled and shook his head, grabbing his older brother and pulling him in for a hug. They stayed like that for a while, before Harold pulled away. Brian laid there, watching as his whole family, except his wife, filed out of his room. As soon as the door closed, Brian turned back to look at Leighanne, who smiled at him in return. Now, what were they talking about before?

“Do you at least know the status of them?” was all that came out of Brian’s mouth.

Leighanne looked up, her face paling. She knew he was going to ask about them again, she just didn’t know if he was ready and able to handle what he was about to hear. “Well…” she took a deep breath in. “First off, you and the others have been unconscious for more than a week or so… as far as I know, you were the first out of the bunch to wake up. You sustained less threatening injuries… you suffered from a concussion, which caused you to fall into a coma. What would explain the concussion is the nasty gash you suffered on your forehead, it took 12 stitches to close the laceration. Both Howie and Nick also sustained non-life threatening injuries, but their injuries were more severe than yours. Howie suffered from a deep cut on his forehead as well, that took 15 stitches to close, he also suffered a slight chip in his skull, which luckily didn’t cause any sort of brain damage. Nick, on the other hand, suffered a broken nose, cracked ribs, and he also had a gash on his head that needed to be stitched close. They are both still unconscious, but are said to awake any day now and are expected to make a full recovery.”

Brian remained silent, allowing the news to sink in. He noticed that she didn’t mention anything about Kevin, AJ and Aaron. He gave himself time to compose himself before he asked her to continue. “What about AJ, Aaron and Kevin?”

Leighanne remained quiet, slightly shaking her head. “I… I’m not sure if I should tell you this now…”

Brian interrupted her by grabbing her hand and tightening his grasp on it. “No… please baby, tell me… I need to know now!”

Leighanne began to cry once more, how could he put her into this situation, why did she have to be the bearer of bad news? “Both AJ and Kevin took the brute of the accident… sustaining injuries that placed them both in ICU. They are both in critical condition, due to the fact that they were both in the back during the crash. Kevin had fractured the upper part of his left leg, broke three ribs, his head was banged up pretty good… he had to go into surgery to drain the liquid in his head so it wouldn’t swell around the brain. AJ… broke his ribs, he had a gash on the back of his head that needed to be stapled shut, he dislocated his left shoulder, one of his broken ribs punctured his lung, and the shin of his right leg was shattered. Luckily, there were able to stop the bleeding eternally in AJ… but both he and Kevin lost a large amount of blood, the doctors can’t guarantee anything. I’m so sorry Brian…”

Brian had given her an shocked look, she was talking as if they were going to lose Kevin and AJ, and there was no way in hell that was going to happen. She didn’t mention anything about Aaron, and he had forgotten to get back to him. “What about Aaron?”

Leighanne glanced away quickly, he wasn’t handling the news about Kevin and AJ too well, how on earth could she tell him about Aaron? “Listen baby… you need to rest, we’ll talk more later, but you need to get all the rest you can get, okay?”

“No…” was all Brian muttered. He stared at her, shaking his head. He knew what she was going to say, well, not going to say, but what she had to tell him. She was procrastinating in telling him about Aaron, which meant something bad had happened. “He’s… gone, isn’t he? He… he can’t be gone, please baby… tell me he’s alright… tell me he’s okay…”

Leighanne cried even harder, the hardest she’s ever cried since she found out about the accident. “I’m sooo sorry sweetie… I… I can’t…”

“Just tell me!” Brian snapped, a pleading look plagued his eyes.

“Aaron… he…” she began to shake her head. “He didn’t make it baby… I am so, so sorry…”

Brian closed his eyes, not believing what he was hearing. Aaron couldn’t be dead… it was just some sick joke his wife was playing on him, in fact, some sick joke they were all playing on him. Any time now, Kevin, Howie and AJ will walk through the door laughing, and both Nick and Aaron will pop out of somewhere, confessing their prank. He looked over at his wife, envisioning her laughing, but it didn’t come, everything was the same. No one came through the door, no one popped out of anywhere, and Leighanne was still crying hysterically.

Brian took the hand an IV was stuck in and he covered his eyes as tears seeped out. Leighanne reached over and had touched his arm, but he jerked away. “Get out…”

Leighanne quickly drew her hand back, taken by surprise by his behavior. She understood that he was mad, she couldn’t imagine how Nick will feel when he finds out, but why was he pushing her away? “Just leave me alone… please…” he mumbled, his hand still covering his eyes.

Hesitantly, Leighanne rose from her seat, staring down upon him. She made a bad choice by telling him, and now it was all her fault that he was turning away from him. She reached out to touch him again, but she withdrew. He needed time… if only she knew how much time he needed exactly.

She walked over towards the door, turning to glance once more at her husband. She opened the door and had walked out slowly. As soon as she closed the door, she had rested against it, wiping her tearstained cheeks, then covering her eyes which was drowning in her salty water. Meanwhile, Brian had continued to silently cry to himself, wishing that he could wake from this god-awful nightmare.

He had heard someone flicking channels, though the sound was faint, it was hard to mistake the constant sound. He opened his eyes slightly, looking at his surrounding through slit, blurry eyes for the first time. He looked to the left side of him and seen that someone was occupying the bed beside him, and they were the source of flicking channels.

He tried to raise up from his bed, he was still confused as to where he was. He seen a needle protruding from his right hand, and various scabbed cuts and bruises decorated both of his arms. He was now puzzled more than ever, why was in such a condition, and why was he in the hospital?

“Howie?”

Howie turned to the source of the voice, finding that the man he was sharing his room was Brian. “Brian…” he croaked out. “What’s… going on?”

Brian aimed the remote control towards the TV and had shut it off. “Look man… I don’t really know much myself… all I know is that we were involved in some major bus accident about a week ago…”

Howie’s eyes widened. “A week ago? How long have I been out?”

“A week and four days…” Brian replied. “I’ve only been out for a week… today is Thursday, I’ve been awake since Monday.”

Howie stared at him, things were getting more confusing to him. “I… I don’t understand! So… I’ve been unconscious for the past week and four days, you’ve been unconscious for the past week… what about the others?”

“AJ, Kevin and Nick are still in a comatose state… the doctors say Nick will most likely be the next one to pull through and wake up, give or take a day or two… but they hadn’t said much about Kevin and AJ.”

Howie shook his head, this couldn’t possibly be happening to them. “Are they alright?”

Brian took a deep breath in before he began to explain everything to him, everything his wife had told him four days ago. Howie was left in utter shock, his mouth slightly agape. How did this happen to them… how could it happen to them? They were the Backstreet Boys for crying out loud, they were inseparable, they were unbreakable. Brian continued to stare at him… he hadn’t mention anything about Aaron, which probably meant that he forgot that Aaron was even on the bus. He decided not to tell him for the sake of his health… he didn’t want Howie to go through the same ordeal he had to go through when he found out about Aaron’s death.

“How… how did this all happen?” Howie had questioned in a soft, barely audible voice.

Brian shook his head and shrugged. “I’m not too sure… no one is telling me too much of anything! All I know is that they said speeding and drunk driving wasn’t a factor, and there was no evidence of foul play. They suspected that our bus tire popped, and our driver had lost control of the vehicle… and that’s when the accident happened.”

Howie remained silent, glancing down to stare at the cold, tiled floor. “Do you think they’ll allow us to see them?”

“Don’t know…” Brian replied with a shrug. “there’s a good possibility that we could see Nick… Kevin and AJ on the other hand… they’re both still in ICU and are still in critical condition.”

Howie nodded. They both fell silent for a while, but the silence was interrupted when someone had opened their door. “Ah… Mr. Dorough, you awoke…” the doctor had said as he walked into the room and had closed the door behind him. “That’s very good to know… I’m Dr. McNorton” he introduced as he held out his hand.

Howie slowly rose his hand and had shook it, “Hi…”

“I just came by to check up on your stats, and to see how Mr. Littrell was doing.” he walked closer to Howie’s bed, inspecting his IV connection, and writing a few things down on his clipboard. He then began to look over the monitor which was recording Howie’s status, writing down what he saw. “Do you mind if I check some things?”

Howie shrugged and shook his head, “Be my guest…”

Dr. McNorton had placed his clipboard down near the edge of Howie’s bed and began to check over his injuries. He unwrapped the gauze that had dressed Howie’s head, and had stared at the stitched wound that ran across his forehead. He then began to overlook the top of his head, to make sure everything was all right.

“Alright, I want your eyes to follow this light…” he said as he pulled out a pocket light and had flashed it in his eyes. He shone it to the left, then to the right, then up and down. Howie’s eyes steadily followed, but Dr. McNorton noticed that his reactions were quite slow.

He grabbed his clipboard and began to write once more. “I’ll have a nurse come in and redress your head…” he said as he continued to write a few more things down. “Everything seems to be going well, the only thing I have a problem with is your reaction, but not to worry, it’s not like it’s something we can’t work with! Due to the chip in your skull, your reactions to certain things may be slower than normal. A heads up, you will be suffering from chronic headaches, and you will feel lightheaded and dizzy most of the time. We recommend that you don’t get up for anything unless you absolutely have to. And don’t worry about sleep… you falling asleep most of the time will not be abnormal… both your mind and body needs all the rest it can get.”

He slipped Howie’s files back into the folder at the foot of his bed. He turned and had walked over towards Brian’s bed, grabbing his files out of the folder. “Lets see Mr. Littrell… how’s the head feeling?”

Brian shrugged, “Same I guess… sore, tender, I feel dizzy and nauseous.”

The doctor nodded as he wrote down everything Brian was telling him. He began to inspect all of Brian’s monitors as well, making sure everything was proper. When he was finished, he placed Brian’s files back into the folder at the end of his bed. “Well, I’m gonna go call a nurse in to re-bandage your wound Mr. Dorough, and I shall see you two later on tonight…”

“Wait!” Howie had called out just as he was making his way out of the door. “We wanted to know if we could go visit Nick… since he’s not in ICU or anything.”

“Mr. Dorough, I had just suggested that it would be best for you to stay off of your feet,” Dr. McNorton tried to explain, but Howie had interrupted him.

“I’ll go in a wheelchair… Brian and I just want to see him, please?”

Dr. McNorton fell silent for a while, thinking it over. “Well… I’m not suppose to be doing this… but hell! Look, I’ll make you two a deal… since you just awoke not to long ago, I advise that you stay here, and let yourself rest up properly. Brian, you on the other hand, I’ll let you go visit Nick for a little while. Come tomorrow, I’ll check up on you Howie, and we’ll see what’ll go on from there. If your all good, I’ll let both you and Brian go see him, if not… well, your just gonna have to wait.”

Brian looked over at Howie, “Well, I might as well wait till tomorrow…”

“No…” Howie had interjected. “I want you to go Brian… he needs you now more than ever.”

Brian stared at him for a while, unsure if he should go or not. “Go…” Howie urged.

With the help of Dr. McNorton, Brian rose from his bed and had got into a wheelchair that was positioned in the corner of the room. Brian glanced at Howie once more before Dr. McNorton began to wheel him out of the room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dr. McNorton had wheeled him in front of Nick’s room, pausing to see what Brian’s reaction would be. Brian simply stared at the closed door, taking in a deep breath and releasing it, shaking. Dr. McNorton grasped the door knob and had twisted it slowly, finally pushing the door open. Brian could only peer around the small crack of the door as the doctor continued to push the door open slowly. He sighed, realizing the worst part was yet to come, he could barely see Nick’s body.

Dr. McNorton began to push Brian in, situating him on the right side of Nick’s bed. As soon as Brian looked at Nick, he gasped. He had a white bandage that was wrapped around his head, and a butterfly band aid covered his dried bloody nose. Both of his hands we positioned by his side, and a mask covered his mouth, helping him to breathe.

“I’ll be back in a few…” Dr. McNorton said as he walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Brian stared at the closed door, but then turned to look at Nick once again. He remained silent for a while, observing Nick’s fragile body. Hesitatingly, he rose his left hand and had grasped Nick’s cold and limp right hand. “What are we doing here?” Brian said to himself, but addressing the question to Nick. “I mean… this is not where your supposed to be man… this is not where we’re all supposed to be…” he froze when he remembered about Aaron, thinking about what was to happen once he finds out that his younger brother is gone.

Brian shifted within his wheelchair, grasping Nick’s hand a little tighter. “I know you can hear me Nick… I know somewhere in you, your awake and you can hear every word I say. You need to wake up man… Howie and I are waiting for you guys. If you wake up, I promise, we can go play basketball and I’ll let you beat me.” Brian chuckled to himself, but his smile slowly faded. “Only if you promise me that you’ll come back…”

He stared at Nick long and hard, before he released his grasp on Nick’s hand. Just as he did so, Dr. McNorton knocked on the door two times, slowly opening it and peering in through the crack. “You ready?”

Brian turned to look at Nick once again, giving his doctor a nod. “We’ll be back tomorrow…” Brian whispered before Dr. McNorton wheeled him out. As soon as the door closed, Nick’s hand had twitched, a tear slipping down his cheek.

“So… how was it?”

Brian grunted as the nurse had helped him back into his bed, leaning back into his plumped pillows and releasing a sigh. “Wasn’t as bad as I expected it to be… there’s a bandage around his head and on his nose.”

Howie nodded and looked away, not knowing what else to say. Brian continued to stare into nothingness, letting reality sink in for once. “What are we doing here?” Brian asked. Howie turned his head towards him. “That’s what I asked Nick… what are we doing here? This wasn’t supposed to happen…”

Howie continued to stare at him, thinking of how right he was, but also, how wrong he was. Brian, of all people, should know that God never promises us tomorrow, and we can never expect the outcome of the next day. Anything can happen to anyone, no matter who you are within this world. It honestly seemed as if Brian was losing his faith.

“Have you prayed?”

Brian’s head snapped towards Howie, his eyes wide at the question that was addressed to him. Yes… Brian’s mind screamed. “No…”

Howie glanced away, there was his answer. Brian closed his eyes and had shoved his head deeper into the pillow. “What’s wrong with me…”

Howi quickly turned to face him, thinking that there was something physically wrong with him, but he could tell he was battling his inner demons, the demons that had surfaced as soon as the crash occurred. “Nothing is wrong with you Brian…”

Brian’s eyes began to flutter close, events of what had happened before the crash playing through his mind. He remember sitting in the lounging area, playing Halo 2 with Aaron, AJ and Nick. He remember when they took a pit stop, both he and Aaron began playing one-on-one basketball outside. He remember watching Aaron as he made his way towards AJ’s bunk to sleep, and not long after, he followed suit to his bunk. He remembered hearing something crash, and hearing both Kevin and AJ make their way towards Nick to help him with whatever he needed help with. What in the hell is going on up there? AJ shouted. Someone is trying to run us off the road… Kevin replied. The tire of your guys’ bus popped and the driver lost control of the vehicle. Leighanne had told him. Oh god… they all had the story mixed up. It was attempted murder, not an accident.

“Brian… Bri, wake up man!”

Brian slowly opened his eyes, which widened when he realized that it was Howie who was trying to frantically wake him up. “What time is it?”

“You slept the whole day…” Howie responded. “But Dr. McNorton came not too long ago, he said that Nick is conscious.”

A small grin had slowly crept up on his face. “Are you serious?”

Howie smiled, “Yeah… he said he was waiting for us man!”

He quickly shot up from his bed, regretting it seconds later as the pain kicked him for doing so. With the help of Howie, he got off his bed and had stood on wobbly legs. Once they were both standing, they both looked down at the one wheelchair that was positioned in front of them.

Brian gestured for Howie to take a seat. “Go man… I’m not as weak as you, no offense… plus, I need to walk this off.”

Howie simply obliged, sitting down on the wheelchair and had waited patiently until Brian was ready. Brian looked up forward towards the door, something kicking in his mind. There was something that had happened before he fell asleep, but for the life of him, he just couldn’t remember what. With regret, he pushed the thought aside, and began to push Howie out of their room and into the hall. They stood there for a while, watching as nurses and a few anonymous patients pass their way, not paying them any mind.

Hesitantly, he began to push Howie towards Nick’s room, a sick anticipation slowly growing within him. Half of him wanted to bust through Nick’s room and just embrace him, but his other half wanted to run away and never face Nick again, there was a splitting image of Aaron within Nick, that’s what everyone said.

Before he knew it, both he and Howie stood before Nick’s room, the door was wide open, with nurses bustling back and forth.

“Go in…” Dr. McNorton said from behind them, both he and Howie turned to look at him. “He’s been waiting for you guys…”

Slowly, Brian pushed Howie into the room, situating him on the left side of Nick’s bed, while he took his place on the right side of his bed.

Brian sighed in relief, a little ounce of color had came back to his flesh. The bandage around his head and on his nose was new, no sign of fresh blood seeping through. He was staring up at the ceiling, as if not even realizing that they were there, but all of a sudden, Nick’s head slowly craned to the side, his eyes glazing over towards Brian.

“Hi…” he croaked.

For once since the crash, he smiled his famous warm grin. “Hi Nick…”

Nick slowly turned his head towards Howie. “Hey D…”

“Hey there buddy…” Howie replied with a smile. “How you holding up there? You gave us all quite a scare…”

Nick sighed, turning his head back so that he was staring up at the ceiling. “Didn’t mean to… but I’ve had better days… I think we all had…”

Brian continued to stare at Nick, who was busy talking to Howie at the moment. Images of Aaron began to flash through his mind, which made the fact of him being in the same room as Nick even harder. Nick’s voice wasn’t even the same, his voice sounded stuffed up and low, he knew it was because of his broken nose, but it was as if this wasn’t even Nick.

As Howie continued to talk with Nick, he glanced over at Brian, who seemed to be in his own little world, fighting his inner demons once again. That’s when it hit him, when he looked back over at Nick, Aaron flashed through his mind. Nick didn’t even know that his little brother was dead, it was as if Nick forgot that Aaron was on their bus when it crashed. He could see what Brian was seeing, he could feel what Brian was feeling, he was thinking exactly Brian was thinking about.

“Where’ Kevin and AJ?”

Nick’s question broke both Brian and Howie of their thoughts. “They’re sleeping…” Howie replied. Nick stared at him for a while, wondering if he really meant it or if he was talking to him as if he was some sort of kid that didn’t understand what death was. He remembered when he was a kid, whoever had passed away, his mother would tell him that they went to sleep, and they would be sleeping for a very long time. He couldn’t help than to think that that was Howie’s way of telling him that they were dead, he was no longer a kid.

“What do you mean they’re sleeping? Are they dead? If they are, just tell me, I’m not a fucking kid anymore D… you can tell me!” Nick snapped, he didn’t mean to sound so mean, but he was scared and he was waiting for them to tell him that yes, both Kevin and AJ were dead.

“No…” Howie shook his head. “They’re not dead Nick… no one died…” Howie bit his tongue as soon as he said that, and Brian simply snapped his head up at him with wide eyes. Howie could feel his own blood fill his mouth, it was painful, but he swallowed the bitter, thick liquid.

Nick relaxed a bit, allowing his head to fall back on his pillow. There was something else he wanted to ask them, but he just couldn’t think of it at the moment. Whatever it was, it was kicking him in the head, nagging at him, which made his headache even worse.

Brian quickly turned away from Nick, hoping he didn’t see his alarmed look. His eyes fell to the corner of the room, and he gasped. There sat Aaron, in the empty chair in the corner of the room. “Why didn’t you tell him?” Aaron had asked him. “Why aren’t you going to tell my brother that I’m dead?” Brian began to shake his head, this wasn’t happening, he was hallucinating. “He needs to know, how long are you going to keep him in the dark? He’s my brother Brian… my big brother, why are you doing this to him?”

“He’s not ready to know…” Brian muttered.

Both Howie and Nick looked towards Brian, who was staring at absolutely nothing in the corner of the room, just an empty chair. “Who’s not ready to know what?” Nick had asked him, but Brian ignored him.

Both Aaron and Brian had turned to look at Nick and Howie, who was staring at him, dumbfounded. Brian turned towards the corner of the room once more to look at Aaron. “He needs to know…” Aaron told him again. “You can’t keep it from him forever… he will find out that I am gone, but the question is, when are you going to allow him? Tell him Brian…” and in a blink of an eye, he was gone.

Brian began to hyperventilate, he needed to get out of that room, and he needed to get out of there now.

“Rok…” Nick called out to him, but Brian continued to ignore him.

This time, Howie rose from his wheelchair and slowly crept his way towards Brian, who was staggering his way out of the room. “Brian…” Howie called out. “Brian, answer me.”

Brian continued to make his way out of the room, he only turned to glance over his shoulder, and when he did, instead of seeing Nick on the bed, he saw Aaron. “Tell him… now.”

Brian shook his head and continued walking, but as soon as he took another step, his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he felt himself falling, face first, towards the hard tiled floor. Without thinking, Howie quickly lunged at him and had prevented his head from hitting the ground.

“Call a nurse Nick…” Howie shouted.

Nick nodded and had pressed his emergency call button, and within seconds, three nurses had filed into Nick’s room, finding both Howie and Brian on the ground.

“What happened?”

Howie shrugged, “He was trying to get out of here, and then, he just fell unconscious and collapsed.”

Dr. McNorton then walked into the room, scooting the crouching nurses away. He placed his two fingers on Brian’s lolled neck, checking for a pulse. “He’s just unconscious, his body is too exhausted, my guess is that stress is wearing him out too much, both physically and mentally. Not to worry though, we’ll just give him some shots to keep him calm when he awakes. For now, he’s just gonna have to get as much rest as he can get.”

Two male nurses had walked into the room and had lifted Brian’s limp form off the ground, placing him on a stretcher they had brought in with them. Howie had turned back towards Nick, who was watching everything in puzzlement. “You alright Nick?”

“Go…” was all that Nick said. “He needs you, don’t worry about me.”

Howie nodded, and with the help of the nurses, he got back into his wheelchair and was wheeled back into their room.

Howie awoke to the feeling of someone injecting liquid into his IV, a burning sensation coursing through his veins. He looked to the side and seen that Dr. McNorton was the culprit for the pain.

“Ahh, Mr. Dorough, how are you feeling?”

Howie yawned, rubbing his hand over his face. “Fine… what was that you just put into me?”

“Morphine,” he replied, discarding the syringe. “For the pain, you don’t remember, do you?”

He shook his head, “No… remember what?”

“Well, Brian had fallen unconscious, and you, had sacrificed yourself and took a dive to break his fall. That instant it happened, your body seemed to be in shock, actually becoming numb to the pain your body was really protesting. As soon as we got you two back into your room, you felt the immerse pain and fell unconscious, kind of like a delayed reaction. Your body is in no condition to be doing anything beyond the extreme, both you and Brian.”

Howie turned to look away, he didn’t remember falling unconscious. “Is Brian alright?”

Dr. McNorton nodded, “Yeah, he’s just getting his required rest. I have some good news, and some bad news…”

Howie’s heart rate quickened, which caused the machine hooked up to him to blare in alarm. “Calm down Mr. Dorough,” Dr. McNorton urged, resetting the machine so it would stop the screeching sound. “If you keep this up, I won’t be able to release any information to you until I know your capable of withstanding it.”

“Sorry,” he softly apologized. “Just getting a little to excited…”

“Excited or worried?” he had asked him. Both, he thought to himself. “well, the good news is that Mr. Alexander James McLean is conscious.” Howie’s eyes widened. “The bad news is… he doesn’t remember anything, and we aren’t too sure if he remembers anyone.” Howie’s heart sank. “That’s where you come in. You see, when Alex became conscious, he had, what we would like to call an outburst episode.”

“An outburst episode?” Howie had repeated.

He simply nodded, “Yes… a part of Alex’s brain was damaged, and we aren’t sure if it had damaged his short term memory, or his long term memory.”

“What’s the difference?”

Dr. McNorton sighed, “If he damaged his long term memory, he will not remember anything that had happened in the past, which means, he won’t remember who you all are, his career, everything is basically wiped clean off his slate. If his short term memory is damaged, he’ll remember everything in the past, but he won’t be able to turn his short term memory into long term memory. So, for example, he seen me today when he became conscious, but as soon as he falls asleep tonight and wakes up tomorrow, he won’t even remember what happened yesterday, and everything would be new to him, including him meeting me again. But then again, I could be wrong about both. Maybe the concussion to his head only affected him in a way where he forgot about the bus crash incident. He’ll remember stepping onto that bus, but everything else from that point will be nothing.”

Howie sat there in shock, letting the new information sink in. “So… your taking me over to him to see if he remembers us?”

Dr. McNorton nodded, “That is, if your up to it…”

Howie fell silent for a while, thinking it over. There was no question that he wanted to see AJ, but what made him think was if he was ready to see his best friend in such a state, what if he didn’t remember who they were? He turned towards Brian, “Hey Rok…”

But Dr. McNorton stopped him, “I don’t think that’s a good ideal. You see, I’m guessing when he saw Nick yesterday, it was in a way, traumatizing for him, being that Nick could have been a reminder of the crash. People receive things differently, and people cope with things in different ways. You seem to show no complications in coping with the incident, but Brian, on the other hand, is struggling with handling what had happened to you all. Certain things from now till god knows when can become a painful reminder of the crash to him, and I don’t mean to sound pessimistic, but you will all have your little episodes somewhere down the road, it’s just that, it’s wearing Brian down more than I had thought.”

Howie had nodded and just stared at Brian, watching his chest rise and fall. Part of him felt bad for leaving Brian here, because they both agreed that they would go in and see Kevin and AJ once they became conscious, but the other part of him knew that Dr. McNorton was right, Brian needed all the rest he could get, and he just wasn’t ready to face certain things like Howie was.

His eyes were heavy, but it slowly drifted open, heavy and painfully. Who knew it took so much to lift open a flab of skin? He could feel his eyes fluttering now, and finally, he was able to keep it open, a burst of white light shining through. Once his vision cleared, he seen an older female nurse looming over him, adjusting something that was above him.

Where am I? he thought. Who is she? He took a deep breath in, and for once, felt something lodged into his throat. He began to panic, the tube down his throat becoming too much for him. The nurse quickly jumped away, realizing that he was conscious and was fighting against the tube that was feeding him air. She moved forward and had tried to remove the tube, but he wouldn’t allow her to touch him. He ripped the tape off of his mouth and began to pull the tubing out himself, gagging and coughing, his lungs feeling blank and empty without the tube. As soon as he pulled it out, vile came to follow, splattering onto his bed sheets, a few splats on the elder nurses’ scrubs.

He then ripped his IV out, dismissing the fact that blood was flowing freely from his punctured vein. He jumped off of his bed, but due to the fact that the shattered bones in his right leg was trying to heal, he collapsed to the ground, pain coursing through him. He quickly backed into the corner of his room. The nurse dashed out of his room, and instead of her returning, an older male had returned.

“Hey…” he calmly called out. “are you alrgiht?”

The man started to walk towards him, but he only shied further into the corner. The man stopped. “Do you know where you are son?”

Son?!? He’s not my father! He shook his head. “Your in the hospital…” the man explained. “I’m Dr. McNorton… what’s your name?”

Name, name… what is your name? He shook his head instead, as if refusing to tell him his name. Dr. McNorton began to inch his way towards his, and every step that was taken, he would push himself further and further into his little corner. He knelt down before him, observing his bloody hand. “Your bleeding…” Dr. McNorton told him, but he didn’t say anything. “Mind if I take a look?”

He abruptly tried to rise from his corner, and he pushed Dr. McNorton away from him. Putting his weight on his left leg, he remained in the tight corner of the room, wishing that if he had pushed himself a little further, he would fall right through the wall and disappear. Dr. McNorton rose from his crouched position and had walked away, right out of the room. Watching him leave had put him at ease for a while, there was no one else in the room, no one except for him, and he wanted to keep it that way.

He looked to the side and had seen a closet. He ripped the doors open and had seen airtight bags hanging on hangers. He pulled one of the bags off and had ripped it open, finding clothes that seemed to belong to him. He pulled the other bag off the hanger and had ripped that one open as well, pouring out jewelry and a wallet. He dismissed everything and had opened the wallet. Nothing but a few 20 dollar bills, credit cards, and an ID. He pulled the ID card out and looked at it carefully. Alexander James McLean. He stared at the picture hard, and then had looked up at a mirror that was on the wall across from him. It was him, that’s for sure, meaning his name was Alexander James McLean, and that was all his belongings.

He tossed the wallet down and had grabbed the clothes, ripping off his hospital garments and replacing it with the clothes that were in the airtight bag. As soon as he got dressed, he stopped what he was doing when some other older male had walked into his room, it wasn’t Dr. McNorton, he knew that for sure.

“Hello…” the man said. “My name is Dr. Seid, and you are…”

He stared at the man, and then had looked down at the open wallet he had discarded, seeing his ID card there. “Alex…” he replied, his eyes widened a bit when he noticed just how deep, raspy and scratchy his voice seemed.

Dr. Seid nodded, “Yes… Alex, well I’m a specialist in neurology, basically what they call a neurologist, and I was appointed to study the nerves within your brain, well, your brain activity.”

Alex continued to stare at him, wondering why on earth he wanted to study his brain activity when all he wanted to do was grab his stuff and go home, wherever that may be. As soon as Dr. Seid took a step forward, he took a step backwards. “Don’t…” Alex warned.

Dr. Seid held his hands up, showing that he was no harm. “I won’t… but where do you think your going?”

Alex ignored and continued grabbing the rest of his belongings, stuffing his wallet into his pocket and placing his jewelry on. He looked up at Dr. Seid, who just stood there, watching his actions. “Move.” he demanded.

Dr. Seid simply shook his head. “No can do Alexander… we can’t let you go.”

“I said move…” he shouted a little louder this time. If the man didn’t move, he was bound to do something drastic.

“I’m sorry Alex, we can’t let you go anywhere, you don’t understand what kind of condition your in, for pete’s sakes, you can’t even remember what had happened to you.”

“Because there was nothing that happened to me!” Alex bellowed. “It’s just you f***ed up people who kidnapped me and are conducting these weird… f***ed up experiments on me! You all made me this way, you made me forget s***, didn’t you?”

“Alex, you don’t know what your talking about…” Dr. Seid began, but Alex interrupted him.

“No… I do know what I’m talking about! Now, get the f*** outta my way!”

Once again, Dr. Seid shook his head, but as soon as he did, Alex had rushed him, ignoring the fact that his leg was protesting in pain, and he pushed the older man out of his way. Dr. Seid stumbled backwards, falling to the ground, watching helplessly as Alex began to hobble out of his room. As soon as Alex opened the door, he found himself facing two pairs of chest, and when he looked up, he was looking at two stern faces which belonged to two huge bodies. Before he could react, one of the large security guards had grabbed him by his waist, lifting him off the ground and bringing him back into the room, meanwhile, the other security had closed the door.

Alex began to kick and scream, rant and rave, anything he could do to get the large man to let him go. He felt like a caged animal now, not understanding what had happened and why this was all happening to him. The man had placed back onto his bed, pinning his shoulders down while Dr. Seid approached him, a syringe in hand.

Dr. McNorton opened the door, revealing two large men holding AJ down to the bed, and Dr. Seid looming over him, about to inject something into him.

Howie averted his eyes up to Dr. McNorton, “What in the hell is going on here? They’re hurting him!”

“Dr. Seid!” Dr. McNorton shouted. “Let him go…”

Dr. Seid had backed away from the bed, gesturing so that the two security guards could move back as well. AJ quickly snapped up from the bed, staring wide eyed at all of them. He stared at Howie for the longest, wondering why they brought in a guy in a wheelchair.

“AJ?” Howie softly called out.

Great, I just learned that my name is Alex, and now, I have some guy calling me AJ? He thought to himself. He got off the bed and began to hobble towards the door, but stopped. They weren’t going to move, and there was no way he was going to push the man in the wheelchair away.

“Where are you going?” Howie asked him.

“Getting away from you people…”

Howie closed his eyes, the moment of truth was finally revealed, and what a way to reveal it. He didn’t remember who his best friend was, he didn’t remember anything or anyone. “AJ, you can’t leave…”

“My name is not AJ!” He shouted, interrupting him. “Don’t call me that, don’t refer to me as if you know me!”

Howie slowly rose from the wheelchair, Dr. McNorton’s arms dashing out, but Howie eased them away. “Alex… my name is Howie, do you remember me?”

AJ stared at him long and hard, for some reason, there was something telling him that he should know who this guy was, but the question was why? The man did look familiar, but as for remembering who he was, there was nothing there but a blank slate. “I wanna go… I just wanna go home, that’s all.”

“And where do you think home is?”

AJ fell speechless, he didn’t know, all he knew was that he couldn’t stay here, he didn’t even understand why he was here in the first place.

“Alex, your in a hospital,” Howie explained. “Do you know why your in a hospital?”

He shook his head, “Stop asking me so much damn questions… I don’t know what happened, I don’t know why I’m in a hospital, I don’t know who you all are, I don’t know anything anymore!”

Howie glanced up at Dr. McNorton, who only looked down at him helplessly. AJ grabbed his head, squeezing his eyes shut. “Why can’t I remember anything? It hurts so much to try to… I need to get out of here!”

He tried to walk towards the door again, but was stopped when one of the large security guards grabbed him from behind, dragging him back. It was déjà vu all over again, the security guards struggling to keep him under control, AJ kicking and raving, trying his best to get them to let him, and Dr. Seid approaching him with the syringe once again.

Howie watched helplessly as the two security guards literally slammed AJ’s small form onto the bed. “Can they not see that they’re hurting him?”

Dr. McNorton shook his head, “No, they’re not hurting him, nor are they trying to. Dr. Seid is simply giving him a sedative so he can take him to get a cat scan done, he needs to take a look at his brain activity.”

Howie stared at Dr. McNorton, and then looked over towards the bed, watching as AJ continued to kick and thrash. He walked over towards the foot of the bed, hoping to God that he could calm him down somehow.

“Alex!” he called out. “Alex, look at me, you need to calm down, they’re not trying to hurt you, they’re trying to help you, let them help you!”

AJ looked up and over towards the foot of bed, truly seeing who Howie was. He was a sincere kind of guy, the peacemaker, a sweet guy. Those traits were familiar to him, but why, and why could he pinpoint those traits only on Howie? That’s when it hit him like a Mac truck, Howie was his best friend. He’s known him since he was a kid, his first and only true best friend.

“I remember…” he muttered. “Howie, I remember, you were my best friend!” he shouted. Howie’s eyes widened. “The Latin carnival, we were acts then at a talent show they were holding! I remember you Howie… D… help me, please!”

But before Howie could stop them, Dr. Seid had injected the liquid into AJ’s arm. “You guys called me AJ…” he continued to babble, feeling the medicine kick in, making him drowsy, but he was determined to get out the fact that he remembered everything now. “Bone… you all called me bone… four more guys… I remember them… I remember you…” his eyes drifted close, he was out for the count.

Brian awoke to the sound of his voice, his once angelic voice singing. So many words, for the broken heart. But the question was, who was singing? It’s hard to see, in a crimson love. It was certainly not him, he didn’t have the voice anymore. So hard to breathe. He didn’t have the will to sing anymore. Walk with me and maybe…

He opened his eyes and looked over to the side of him, seeing Howie lying in his bed, tears falling from his eyes. He was staring at the TV, and when he looked up to see what he was watching, he seen their music video, Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely.

Nights of light, so soon become. Why was he crying? Wild and free, I could feel the sun. Why was he watching one of their music videos and crying? Your every wish, will be done. Did one of the guys die? They tell me…

“Howie?” Show me the meaning of being lonely.

Howie turned towards Brian, quickly wiping his tears and giving him a small grin. “Hey Rok…” Is this the feeling, I need to walk with.

“Why are you crying?” Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are.

Howie shrugged, “I’m not crying anymore…” There’s something missing in my heart.

“Well, why were you crying?” Life goes on, as it never ends.

“Didn’t we use to have it all?” Eyes of stone, observe the trends.

“Yes Howie… but that doesn’t answer my question.” They never say, forever gaze.

“That’s just it… we used to have it all.” If only…

“We still have it all, right? I mean, Kevin and AJ will pull through, Nick is fine…” Guilty roads, to an endless love.

“But, for long will we have it, have them? What about Aaron?” There’s no control, are you with me now?

Brian cringed, he forgot about Aaron. “He’s in a better place D., you know that.” Your every wish, will be done.

“Funny, you weren’t saying or thinking that before.” They tell me…

Brian fell silent, he was right. “What’s wrong D?” Show me the meaning of being lonely.

“I seen AJ today… he doesn’t remember us Brian.” Is this the feeling, I need to walk with.

“He’s conscious? He’ll be okay?” Tell me why I can’t be there where you are.

Howie shrugged. “Yes he is, but I don’t know, time will tell. He didn’t even remember who I was, until they injected him with a sedative that is.” There’s something missing in my heart.

“What do you mean until they injected him with a sedative?” There’s nowhere to run…

“I meant exactly what I said, he was freaking out because he couldn’t remember anything or anyone, but right before they injected him, he remembered.” I have no place to go.

“So, where is he now?” Surrender my heart…

“They’re doing a cat scan on him.” Body and soul.

“So, do you mean that he’s lost his memory forever?” How can it be your asking me to feel…

“No, I’m not sure… he was beginning to remember who I was.” The things you’ve never shown.

Brian fell silent once again. Show me the meaning of being lonely…

“He wasn’t the same person Brian…” Is this the feeling I need to walk with.

“I know D., and he won’t be.” Tell me why I can’t be there where you are?

“Didn’t we once have it all?” There’s something missing in my…

“Yeah… we did.” Heart…

He closed his hard cover journal book and had swiftly but quietly rose from where he was seated. He slowly passed in front of Kevin, whose eyes were half open, half closed. Nick stood there for a while, waving his hand back and forth, making sure that Kevin was out for the count. When he realized that he wasn’t going to get a response, he continued his journey to the bunks.

For some reason, something was telling him not to go straight to his bunk, that he should go all the way towards the end of the bus. He looked over towards AJ, who was sleeping in his bunk, and then glanced at Aaron, who was sleeping in AJ’s bunk. He bypassed Kevin’s bunk, following his instincts and going towards the back of the bus.

He opened the small door that led to their lounge room, and looked around. Everything was as it should be, nothing seemed out of order, so what was it exactly that had led him here? Just as he was about to turn to make his way towards the bunks, two headlights in the window had caught his attention, it was nearing the back of their bus faster and faster. Just when he thought the car was going to slam into them, it swerved to the side, speeding right past them.

He sighed in relief, but all of a sudden, something had slammed into the side of their bus, running them partially off the road. He quickly turned to alert the fellas, but he found himself frozen. He was standing there, that much he was certain, but at the same time, he seen his own body fly out from Kevin’s bunk, his head slamming into the bunk across from him. He found himself wincing, actually feeling the pain in his head as if he was really there when he flew out and had hit his head on the bunk.

AJ had awoken around this time, and he tore his bunk curtains apart. He was looking down at him, “What the fuck is going on?”

He watched his other self as he looked up at AJ, not responding, but simply touching the blood that was pouring from his head. AJ’s eyes had widened. “What the hell happened to you?”

He knew he wasn’t going to respond, for some reason, he knew he wasn’t. He continued to stare at his self, watching the blood trickle down, gasping when the pain in his head was slowly becoming too much. He put his hand to his forehead, feeling no blood, but when he brought his hand down to look at it, there was blood that stained his fingertips. What the hell is going on? he thought to himself.

“Um… stay here, I’ll go and get something to get that cleaned up.” AJ had told him as he got up from his bunk and began to make his way towards the bathroom, near the back.

The car had slammed into the side of their bus again, throwing AJ off guard. Nick had thrown his arms out to try and catch him, but AJ fell right through, crashing into the wall. “What in the hell is going on up there?” AJ shouted to Kevin.

“Someone’s trying to run us off the road.” Kevin responded. He watched Kevin as he bent down towards his other self, making sure if he was alright. Meanwhile, AJ was in the bathroom, pushing everything aside in search for a washcloth.

“I’ll check up on Aaron… just make sure that D. and Rok’s alright.” Kevin said as he rose from his crouched position, walking towards the back, towards where Aaron was sleeping.

He remembered everything now. The car was going to slam into them one more time, running them completely off the road this time. They will tumble down a hill, and the bus will be severed in half. He, Howie and Brian will be the only ones in the front part of the bus, while Kevin, AJ and Aaron remain in the severed back part of the bus. He had to get them away from the back.

“Kevin… go back!” he shouted. Kevin reached up towards Aaron’s bunk to awake him.

He turned towards the bathroom, AJ was now soaking the washcloth. “AJ!” he screamed. “Get outta there… go back to the front of the bus!”

But they couldn’t hear him, nor could they see him. That’s when it happened. The car had slammed into them once more, running them off the road. Everything was set into slow motion from there. The bus tumbled down the hill, tossing them all around. They were falling at such a fast and hard rate, that once they crashed into a large tree, the whole bus severed in half, the front part of the bus came to a stop, but the back part continued to tumble down.

Everything went black from there on, there was only the faint glow of the bus lights flickering. He looked up through hazy eyes, seeing that everything was a total wreck. The bathroom area was completely smashed in, trapping AJ inside. He seen a body on the ground, wedged between the bunks, it was Kevin.

“Aaron… Kevin!” he heard his other self shout. He was looking down towards the ground, he had accidentally kicked Kevin’s hand. He bent down to survey the damage, then quickly arose to find Howie behind him.

“Damnit D., didn’t I tell you to stay up there with Brian?” he heard himself say.

“Brian’s fine, where could he possibly go?” Howie replied. “It’s them we need to worry about.”

His eyes shifted to the person standing behind Howie. He wasn’t anyone he knew, and with the evil gleam in his eyes and the berretta protruding from his waistband, he knew otherwise.

“D., watch out!” he screamed, but he forgot, no one could hear or see him.

The man wrapped his arms around Howie’s waist, hoisting him in the air. The other him had whirled around, freezing when he seen the man holding Howie captive.

“One more step and I’ll blow his fucking brains out!” the man shouted, pulling his gun out and slamming it into Howie’s temple.

He was frozen on the spot, not making another move. “Get in that bus…” the man demanded. Just as he turned to walk inside, the man had took his gun and had whipped it across the back of Howie’s head, knocking him unconscious. He turned around once again, seeing the man aiming his gun at Howie, preparing to fire. Without thinking, he had lunged at him, but the man had kicked him in the face, knocking him to the ground.

He touched his nose, that’s how my nose broke , he thought to himself, it wasn’t from the crash. The man continued to beat on his unconscious body, until he completely fell limp. The man finally rose, staring at the bloody mess he created. He aimed his gun once more, this time at his body and was preparing to fire, but stopped when he heard sirens nearing.

“Fuck!” the man swore. “I’ll be back to finish this off…” he said before he dashed into the dark forest.

He began to walk towards his unconscious body, looking down at his bloody face. For some reason, he was feeling sleepy, and an immense pain began to course through his whole body. He didn’t understand what was happening to him, and he could barely make out what was happening around him. Things were slowly growing dim, and all he could hear were voices.

“There was a severe accident involving one bus, the Backstreet Boys tour bus to be exact.” someone had reported.

“Where’s the other half of the bus?” a police officer had asked.

“Down here!” another had replied. “Quick, get the paramedics down here, there’s a few over here!”

“Approximately how much was on the bus?”

“Six males sir, only one was found up there.”

“We found three more, there’s two missing…”

“Oh god…”

“What is it?”

“I’ve found one sir… or, what’s left of him.”

“What in the hell do you mean?”

“Sir, I only found half of him, the top half to be exact. His body was severed in the crash sir.”

“My god, which Backstreet Boy is it?”

“He doesn’t appear to be a Backstreet Boy sir… this one looks young.”

“Who the hell else was on their tour bus?”

“… Aaron Carter sir, Nick Carter’s younger brother…”

“Aaron!!!”

He jolted awake, wailing in his hospital beds and setting off the alarms of the machines that were hooked up to him. Nurses had filed into his room, trying their best to calm him down, but they couldn’t.

“Aaron!” he continued to shout. “Aaron!”

Dr. McNorton walked into the room, trying to restrain Nick’s flailing arms, but was having a hard time in doing so. “Grab a sedative!” he shouted to any one of the nurses.

Nick continued to kick and thrash, being unable to wake from his nightmare. “Nick…” Dr. McNorton calmly called out. “Nick, calm down son, your having a dream.”

“Aaron!” he continued to scream, this time, tears was streaming down his face, he knew he wasn’t still sleeping, he was wide awake, but all he could do was scream his brother’s name. There was no way he could be dead, Howie told him that no one had died. He was alive, he had to get to him now, he was probably scared.

Dr. McNorton had grabbed the syringe from the nurse and had ripped the cap off with his teeth. He pushed Nick arms down once more and had injected the liquid into his neck, quickly injecting the sedative and pulling the needle out when Nick continued to struggle.

His eyes grew heavy, he couldn’t fall asleep again, he didn’t want to endure another nightmare. His hand shot out and he grabbed Dr. McNorton by his forearm. “Where’s Aaron?” he had asked him, his voice beginning to slur as he felt the drug take a stronger affect on him. “Tell him… that I said… not to be, scared… I’m here… for… him.” and then he was out.

Dr. McNorton gently pulled his arm out of Nick’s softening grasp. One of the nurses looked up at him. “Who’s Aaron?” she asked him.

He sighed, feeling heavy sympathy Nick. “Aaron was his brother…”

“Wait, Aaron Carter? The one who was…”

“Yes!” he quickly answered, not wanting to hear it, the pain of this whole situation was affecting him more than he thought. “Yes… that Aaron.”

“He doesn’t know that he’s… he’s dead?”

“No,” he answered, sighing again. “He doesn’t know yet.”

“You guys aren’t going to tell him?”

Dr. McNorton turned away, walking towards the door. “He needs time…”

“Why did you just sit there? Did you forget the moves or something?”

Brian shrugged as he continued to observe their music video, Backstreet’s Back. Both he and Howie had nothing better to do than to sit there and watch all their music videos, reminiscing the good times, and the days where they once had it all. “I don’t really know… I can’t even remember if I forgot the moves, or if I just gave up!”

Howie chuckled, “I’m surprise Fatima didn’t get on your ass for that!”

“Me too!”

There was a knock on the door, and then it slowly opened, Dr. McNorton’s head peeking in. “May I come in?”

“Sure!” Howie responded.

He walked all the way in, closing the door behind him. “I need to ask you guys a question.”

Both Howie and Brian exchanged glances. “What is it?”

“Have you guys told Nick about Aaron?”

Howie shook his head, “No… it was as if he forgot that his brother was even on the bus. None of us wanted to mention anything to him, we felt he wasn’t ready to know.”

“Why do you ask?” Brian questioned.

“Well,” Dr. McNorton had grabbed the chair that was in the corner of their room and had situated it in front of their beds. “he awoke not too long ago, from a nightmare he was having. Of course we had to sedate him, due to his erratic behavior, but he kept screaming Aaron’s name. As soon as I gave him the sedative, he grabbed me by the arm, asking me where he was, and to tell him not to be scared, that he was here for him.”

At that being said, Howie’s heart dropped, while Brian’s heart rate quickened. He was staring at the door, and there stood Aaron. Tell him now… he needs to know! Aaron said to him, and then disappeared.

“I can’t…” he mumbled.

Both Howie and Dr. McNorton turned to look at him. “You can’t what?”

Brian began to shake his head. “I… I can’t tell him.”

“Fine,” Dr. McNorton said with a shrug. “I can tell him if you want.”

“No!” Brian shouted. “No, you can’t tell him, he’s not ready to know yet.”

“Look Mr. Littrell, I understand the fact that you don’t have the heart to tell him because you think he’s not ready to know, but how long will you keep him in the dark?” Aaron had asked him the same question. “He will find out sooner or later, and the longer you keep it from him, the more devastating it’ll be as soon as he finds out.”

“We’ll tell him when he’s ready…” Brian replied softly. “You don’t understand Nick… he’ll hurt himself even more physically if we tell him now, and he’ll never allow his body to heal properly. I want to at least wait until we know he’s strong enough, both physically and mentally.”

Dr. McNorton couldn’t fight with him there, Nick needed all the time he could possibly get to heal, and dropping this devastating news on him now would only prolong the process. “I understand…” he quietly said as he rose from his seat, leaving their room.

Kristin walked through the hallway, a bouquet of flowers in hand. She stopped in front of her husband’s door, staring at it, hesitating to go inside. Through the window in the door, she could see a nurse tending to him, adjusting some of the machines and checking his IV connection. When the nurse was done, she grabbed her clipboard and made her way out of the room. As soon as she opened the door, she was greeted by Kevin’s wife.

“May I help you?” the nurse had asked her.

“Hi, my name’s Kristin Richardson,” she introduced with a warm smile. “I’m Kevin’s wife, I was just visiting, that’s all.”

The nurse smiled back, “Oh, why hello. You sure are one lucky gal to be married to handsome man such as him, I swear, old women like me just don’t know how to find a man such as yours! You may go inside though, I was only checking his stats. The good news was that his heart and brain activity improved from yesterday, in fact, they have been improving over the days this week. I’m on my way over to Dr. McNorton to report the good news, he should be pulling through in no time. Do you have a vase for those flowers?”

Kristin had looked down at her bouquet, “Oh, no…”

“Here sweetie, let me take it, I’m on my way over to the desk anyway, and I’ll grab a vase for you.”

“Thank you so much,” Kristin said as she handed the flowers over to the nurse.

“No problem…” she said as she began to walk away. “Oh, and in case anything happens or if you need anything, don’t hesitate to hit the nurse button, it’s on the right side of his bed.”

Kristin nodded, turning to face the room. She slowly walked in, closing the door behind her. She stood there for a while, trying to bring herself to walk towards his bed, she just couldn’t. She turned and had grabbed the door knob, wanting to run out of the room, but something was pulling her to stay. She released her grasp on the door knob, turning to look at his still body. Hesitantly, she began to walk towards the right side of his bed, glancing over all the machines that were hooked up to him.

As soon as she was at his bed side, tears sprung to her eyes. There was a bandage that was wrapped around his head, and his face seemed stern and a bit swollen. She slowly rose her hand and began to gently run her fingers through his hair, tickling his scalp.

“Hey baby…” she whispered. “the nurse said you should be pulling through in no time… you don’t know how glad I am to hear that. You’re the only one we’re all waiting for… both Howie and Brian are healing fine, Nick too… AJ’s conscious, now we’re just waiting for you baby. I know you can hear me… can you open your eyes for me sweetie?” she waited for something, anything, but he remained still, his eyes shut.

She gently grabbed his right hand, being careful not to disturb the IV needle that was there. “C’mon honey…” she said as she gently squeezed his hand. “open your eyes for me.” she waited once again, and only got the same results.

She sighed, “I know… it takes time, I’m just… I’m just anxious to see you babe, I can’t wait any longer to see your eyes… to hear your voice. I need you Kevin… and I don’t mean to sound selfish, but I need you now, so does your mother, your family and fans… the fellas.” She fell silent for a while. “I’ve brought you flowers honey… the nurse took it to go and put it in a vase of water, which I should go and check to see if she’s coming back with it…”

She had released her grasp on Kevin’s hand when she said that, but then, she felt pressure on her hand, his hand was grasping onto hers. She leaned in closer to his bed, hovering above him, waiting to see if his eyes would open. His eyes fluttered open slowly, and the monitors that were hooked up to him began to beep faster. As soon as he was able to keep his heavy eyes open, he slowly glanced over towards his wife, who was near in tears.

“Baby?” she softly ask, making sure that he was really conscious and that she wasn’t just envisioning it. “Baby, if you can understand me, I want you to squeeze my hand, can you do that for me?”

Kevin continued to stare at her, not doing what she had asked. It wasn’t till later he began to respond, squeezing her hand to let her know that he could hear her. Kristin’s smile grew even bigger as more tears spewed from her eyes. She reached over the railing on the side of his bed and had clicked the nurse call button. Within seconds, two nurse had entered the room, and Kristin had tried to back away to make room for them, but Kevin refused to let her hand go.

“You can stay there,” the nurse had told her. “We’re just going to remove the tubing from his lungs.”

Kristin nodded and had walked back towards the bed, squeezing his hand. They took off the tape around his mouth and began to pull out the tubing. As soon as it was out, he began to cough and wheeze for air, grasping his wife’s a bit too hard. Once the tubing was out, his grasp began to relax a bit, until it sort of fell limp. Both the nurses exited the room, leaving Kristin alone with her husband once again.

Kristin began to gently run her fingers through his hair once again, watching him as he took in gulps of air. Once his hissing, aching lungs had gotten enough air, he looked over towards his wife and grinned, “Hi…” he croaked, and then began to cough.

She placed her finger on his lips, suppressing his coughing spasms and preventing him from saying another word. “Shh… don’t say anything baby, just breathe…”

A few minutes passed, then Kevin was able to suppress his coughing fits. He looked up at her and reached his hand out, shaky but slow, he caressed her face. She simply let her eyes drift closed and smiled when she felt her husband’s touch for the first time in a long time.

She grabbed his hand and brought it away from her face. “Baby,” she took a pause to kiss him on his palm. “I’ve missed you…”

He smiled, “How could you miss me when I’ve been here for the whole time?”

There was a knock on the door, and both of them turned around to find Dr. McNorton peering in. “I hope I didn’t interrupt anything.”

“No,” Kristin replied. “Come on in doctor…”

Dr. McNorton pushed the door open more fully and had walked in, walking towards the other side of Kevin’s bed. “Sorry,” he apologized. “Just came here to check his stats, I promise I’ll be out in a quick minute.”

He pulled out a small flashlight from his coat pocket and clicked it on. He began to shine it in Kevin’s eyes, observing the way his pupils would shrink. “Hi Kevin I’m Dr. McNorton, do you know where you are?”

“The hospital” Kevin replied in a monotone voice.

“Do you know who this woman is on the right of you?”

Kevin looked over towards Kristin, “My wife.”

“Do you remember what happened?”

Kevin faltered to reply. When he became conscious, he wasn’t aware of his surroundings and situation at first, until Dr. McNorton asked him questions. He tried really hard to think, but come to think of it, he couldn’t, for the life of him, remember what had happened, why he was there, what had got him there. “No.”

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

Kevin thought for a while, his mind backtracking as best as it could. “I remember… a bus… leaving somewhere on a bus…”

Dr. McNorton nodded, writing down a few things on his clipboard. “Uh huh… go on.”

“I remember… we were at a venue, weren’t we? The fellas and I had gotten done with a show, and we left on a bus to the next city… don’t know where though.”

“Okay,” Dr. McNorton continued to nod. “Do you remember when this was? The date of your last concert?”

His head began to hurt as his mind continued to dig deep through his memories. “November… November 13th I believe…”

“I see… and is that all you remember?”

Kevin fell silent for a while, was that really all that he had remembered? “Yes… why doctor? What is this all about?”

Dr. McNorton stopped writing on his papers. He looked up at Kevin, and then had glanced over towards Kristin, as if making sure it was all right for him to tell Kevin what happened. Kristin simply nodded. “You were involved in a severe accident… your bus crashed to be exact. The tire of your tour bus popped and the bus driver lost control of the vehicle.”

Kevin’s eyes widened, they’re tour bus crashed?!? “Wait, what… when did this happen? Where’s Brian and them? Are they alright, are they still alive?”

Dr. McNorton held up his hand to prevent him from blabbering anymore. “Please Mr. Richardson, calm down. The four of them are fine, but if you don’t calm down, I won’t tell you anything more.”

Kevin nodded like a little child. Dr. McNorton began to discuss the injuries each of them suffered from the crash. Kevin could only stare at the doctor, wide-eyed at the new information he was receiving. He glanced over at his wife, who was silently crying, and then had looked back at the doctor. “Wait, there was someone else on the bus…
someone else was with us…” he tried his hardest to remember who it was. “It was… Aaron, that’s it! Aaron was with us as well, what about him? Is he okay?”

Both Dr. McNorton and Kristin looked at each other. “I’m sorry,” Kevin’s eyes closed. “Aaron was… he didn’t make it.”

Kevin remained silent for the longest, eyes shut tightly. Kristin grabbed his hand and began to squeeze it. “Baby?” she called out. “Baby, please… don’t shut us out like this. Please, talk to me Kevin…”

Kevin’s eyes opened, revealing glassy, green orbs. “Thank you doctor.” he mumbled, squeezing Kristin’s hand in return.

Dr. McNorton nodded and turned to walk out of the room, leaving the two alone once again.

“I’m sorry sweetie…” Kristin whispered, raising Kevin’s hand to her lips, kissing the top of it softly and gently. “Are you okay?”

Kevin continued to stare at the closed door, not wanting to allow the new information to sink in. “I’m okay… I’ll be fine, I just need to rest some more, that’s all.”

Kristin nodded and had leaned down to kiss him on his forehead. “I’ll leave you be… I’ll be back to check on you later, if you need anything, just hit the nurse button on the side of your bed.” She kissed him on his cracked lips, tasting a bittersweet mixture of dried blood and salty tears, mixed with the sweet taste of the lips she had been longing to kiss again. “I love you Kevin…”

Kevin licked his lips, tasting his wife on them. “I love you too baby…” he whispered, watching her as she made her way out of his room. As soon as the door closed, his eyes drifted close as well. He was now beginning to regret ever waking up.

Brian awoke to the feeling of someone stroking his hair, slow and lovingly. He opened his eyes, thinking he’d be greeted by his wife Leighanne, but instead, he saw Kristin.

“Hey…” she said with a smile. “Didn’t wake you, did I?”

He stretched out his arms and yawned. “No, I was waking up anyway.” He began to push himself up, propping himself so he was sitting up. “When did you get here?”

“Not too long ago,” she replied. “I just left from seeing your cousin…”

Brian stared at her, “And…”

She couldn’t hold it back no longer, she broke out into a full smile. “He’s awake!”

Brian continued to stare at her, but it didn’t take long for a grin to creep up on his face as well. The only thing he could do was reach out and grab her in a tight embrace. Kristin was taken by surprise at first, but she quickly melted into the arms of her husband’s cousin. Once they parted, Brian turned towards Howie, who was still sleeping.

“Howie!” he called out. “Hey D.!”

Howie shifted, but didn’t awake. Both Brian and Kristin chuckled, “That man can sleep through anything.” Kristin retorted.

Brian could only laugh in reply. “I’m glad to know that he’s okay though…” an awkward silence had befallen them, until Brian decided to break it. “How are you holding up?”

“I’m doing okay, now… knowing that everyone is alright.” she replied. “Who I’m worry about though is Leighanne.” Brian’s heart stopped. “You need to talk to her Brian…”

He totally forgot that he had literally iced his wife out the day he awoke. It was just that so many things were running through his head, he was angry at everyone, especially himself. The last thing he told her was to leave her alone, since then, she hadn’t came back to visit him, not even to check up on him. She did exactly what he asked her, and now, he was regretting for ever saying that.

“I know,” he sighed. “I… I didn’t mean to snap at her like that, it just… it just happened, you know? I really didn’t want her to stay away, I just needed to be alone at that time, to get my thoughts together. But now, my thoughts are together, and… what I wouldn’t give to have her with me right now.”

Kristin pulled up a chair and had situated it next to Brian’s bed. She grabbed his hand and held it in hers. “The day she came back from the hospital, she called me, crying. She felt as if you no longer loved her. She wanted to be there for you, she didn’t want you to go through this whole ordeal by yourself, but she had no other choice than to give you what you wanted. To tell you the truth Brian, she said she didn’t want to see you again… and she felt like she wouldn’t be able to face you, even when you came out of the hospital. She hasn’t been getting any sleep, she hasn’t been eating much of anything. Heck, your mother even had to take Baylee outta her hair for a while… she was becoming a wreck.”

All because of me… Brian thought to himself. “She needs you,” Kristin continued. “more than you need her.”

“How?” Brian snapped, he didn’t mean to sound so harsh, but all he was feeling at that moment was guilt, guilty for the fact that his beloved wife was now a wreck all because of him, and she felt like she had no one to turn to. “Do you expect me to miraculously recover and walk up to her with a bouquet of roses and box of chocolates in my hand?”

Kristin sighed and shook her head. “I don’t expect you to do anything Brian… I’m not expecting you to do what’s right… you should be expecting yourself to do that. You’ll think of something, I know you will… although a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates wouldn’t be a bad ideal, what she really needs right now is her husband… what she really wants right now is for her husband to come back to her.”

Kristin rose from her seat and leaned over to kiss Brian on the forehead. “I’ll be back later…” she said as she began to walk out of the room.

“Kristin!” Brian called out.

Kristin turned around once she opened the door. “Yes?”

“Thanks.” he simply replied.

Kristin grinned and nodded, “No problem Bri… both Leigh and I were ‘this’ close to losing our husbands, and we’d be damned if we lose them again.” and with that, she walked out and closed the door behind her.

Brian continued to stare at the closed door, thinking of how right she was. Only now did he realize how close Kristin and Leighanne were to losing their husbands, how close they all were to losing their lives. He glanced over at the phone… he’d be damned if he lost his wife, forever.

The sound of monitors beeping continuously woke him from his deep induced slumber. He opened his eyes and tried to move his arms, but found that they were restrained to his bed. The beeping noise of the machine started to blare as his heart beat began to beat rapidly. He was panicking, he didn’t know where he was, why he was there, and who was keeping him there.

An older man then approached him, a clipboard in hand. “Now don’t struggle Alex, you’ll only make the restraints tighter. My name is Dr. Seid, do you remember me?”

AJ stared at the man long and hard. “Yeah… you were that bitch that sedated me.”

Dr. Seid’s eyes widened in amusement. “What’s with the foul language? I will release you from these restraints, only under one condition.”

Things fell silent, and AJ just stared at him. “Yeah? And what’s that?”

“You won’t try another great escape… your body is in absolutely no condition to be doing the activities you were trying to perform earlier.”

AJ had let himself fall back onto the bed, relaxing. “Okay… I’m calm, I promise I won’t do anything, can you just get these damn things off my arms?”

Dr. Seid nodded and placed his clipboard down at the foot of AJ’s bed. He walked to one side and unfastened the leather belt that tied his arm down, and then had walked to the other side to unfasten the other restraint. Once AJ was free, he brought his hands in front of him and began to clench and unclench it, making the blood pump through his veins and gaining feeling in them once again.

Dr. Seid grabbed a chair from the corner of the room and had sat himself down in front of AJ. “Well, since you were sedated, we were able to perform a cat scan on you and get the information we needed. There’s good news, and bad news.”

“What’s the bad news?” AJ immediately asked.

“Well,” Dr. Seid said with a sigh. “The bad news is that you have a mild case of amnesia. The good news is that you should gain your memory back… all in due time. You see, from what we observed from your brain activity, it seems as if your memory will serve as a TV show.”

AJ stared at the doctor as if he was crazy. “A TV show? Look, I don’t understand all this fancy… medical lingo!”

Dr. Seid chuckled. “It’s not medical terminology, it’s a simile, figure of speech. It’s as if your brain is now a TV, and your memory is a TV show. TV shows normally consist of episodes, it’s not one solid film, it’s broken up into different parts so it can be viewed or displayed at different times. Well, that’s exactly how your mind if working now. Like I said before, your memory will come back to you, all in due time, and the way it will come back to you is in episodes. With the help of different objects or things, it should help bring your memory back to you. You won’t remember everything at once, some things will come back to you, and though some of the memories will be incomplete, another episode of your memory should solve the puzzle. Just, don’t force yourself to remember everything at once… that process can become extremely painful, even lethal. Just allow your brain to process your memory as it will, and go along with it.”

“So…” AJ slurred. “What your saying is that my memory can come back to me at any time, in any form, but it’s not as if I will gain my full memory back just like that?”

Dr. Seid nodded. “Exactly. Would you like to know the condition your in?”

Ever since he awoke, he felt a terrible stabbing pain in his abdomen. “I was going to say no, but this pain in my stomach is telling me otherwise…”

“Well,” Dr. Seid said with a sigh, “You suffered a couple of broken ribs, they were healing quite well until you decided to jump out of your bed and fight us like a mad man. What I’m surprised you don’t feel is any pain in your leg.”

AJ rolled his eyes, “Oh I feel it alright, I was just getting to that pain!”

“That pain is due to the fact that your tibia in your right leg, that too was healing quite well, but you decided to walk… I should say limp on it. One of your broken ribs had punctured your lung, but we were able to repair that and control the eternal bleeding. Your mother was gracious enough to donate her blood to make up for the amount of blood you lost. Your left shoulder was indeed dislocated, but it seems as if your doing fine with the movement and rotation of your arm, don’t be alarmed at the discomfort, nothing rehabilitation can’t fix.”

AJ’s mind all of a sudden went blank. His heart rate began to increase, the word ‘rehabilitation’ had struck something deep within him. Flashes of images appeared in his mind, empty bottles of Jack Daniels, cocaine substance in zip block bags, his temper was out of control, especially when he was drunk. His grandmother had died, the cause of his depression and anxiety attacks, driving him deeper into the bottle. He could taste the bitter liquid filling his throat, burning and suffocating him. He admitted he had a problem, he went to rehab. Many endless nights were spent sitting up in his room alone, he was silently battling his demons by himself, facing his alter ego for the first time.

“No!” he shouted. “I don’t want to go back to rehab… don’t make me go back there!”

Dr. Seid stared at him, amused with his response. “That, Alex, was a memory episode. The word ‘rehabilitation’ brought back the memory of you going through rehab when you had your drug and alcohol addiction. Not to worry though, this isn’t that kind of rehab, you can believe me on that. The rehabilitation center I’m requiring you to attend is a physical rehabilitation, to help you gain full use of your left arm and right leg again. A couple of exercises, and you should be back to dancing in no time, without the feeling of discomfort. Now, the mild case of amnesia was caused from a deep laceration in the back of your head. We stapled it shut, and for the next couple of days, maybe even weeks, you will suffer from severe headaches, I’m not going to lie, but we have you on morphine to help dull the pain and discomfort.”

AJ fell silent for a while. “There was a man… that came in to see me…”

“Do you remember who he was? His name?” Dr. Seid asked him.

“Howie…” he replied softly, not looking up to look Dr. Seid in the eye. “His name is Howie… he was and still is my best friend.”

Dr. Seid nodded. He grabbed his clipboard off the foot of the bed and was about to make his way out, until AJ called him back.

“Doctor!” he called out. “Do you know where he is?”

“He’s in his room, both he and Brian are sharing a room together.”

Who’s Brian? He thought to himself, but he couldn’t think about too many things at once. Right now, he was thinking about the whereabouts of Howie. “Could I… see him?”

Dr. Seid sighed, “No…” AJ’s face fell. “But he can see you.”

AJ looked up, his lips curved upwards, slowly revealing a grin. “Thank you.”

Dr. Seid smiled as well, opening the door and walking out. As soon as he closed the door, he stood there for a while. He chuckled and shook his head, maybe AJ wouldn’t be a lost cause after all.

He turned on his side, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep in, but nothing seemed to work. He finally gave up, opening his eyes and seeing Brian staring at the hospital phone. He pushed himself up on his bed, yawning and stretching his arms out.

“You know, the phone isn’t gonna answer itself.” Howie said.

Brian looked over at him, and grinned. “I gotta make a call.”

“And what are you waiting for?” he asked. “It’s not hard to pick up the phone and punch in seven digits… plus the area code.”

There were two silent knocks on their door, and it slowly opened, revealing Dr. McNorton. “Hey fellas.”

“Hey doctor” Howie replied. “What can we do for you today?”

“Well,” he began, tucking the clipboard underneath his arm. “Someone became conscious again, and they would like to see you Mr. Dorough.”

Howie gave him a puzzled look. It couldn’t be Kevin, he hasn’t heard any news of him ever becoming conscious. Nick could be a possibility, but why would he want to see only him? Of all people, wouldn’t he want to see Brian? That’s when it dawned on him, it was his best friend.

“AJ?”

Dr. McNorton smiled and nodded. “That’s if, you’re up to it…”

The smile on Howie’s face never left him. “Of course I’m up to it…” he paused and looked over at Brian. “But… what about Brian? Can’t he see him too?”

Dr. McNorton shrugged, “Well, you see, Alex only remembers you so far. Speaking of which, we have the results of Alex’s cat scan. Unfortunately, he has a mild case of amnesia; he doesn’t remember much of anything from his past. What he has remembered so far was you Mr. Dorough, and his trip to rehab. Not to worry though, he will regain his full memory back, but it will take some time. Certain things, such as music, words, faces and such will strike something within his brain, and bring back his memories in episodes.”

“Episodes?”

“Yes, episodes. You know how you watch a TV show; it is comprised of episodes which are shown every day or week. That’s how his mind will be acting as, a TV show. You must make sure not to force everything onto him all at the same time. The results can be extremely painful, even lethal in his case. But nonetheless, it is important that you try to bring things to him to help his memory come back. He will be a lot more edgy and short tempered, but you must understand it’s because he’s having a hard time remembering, and it becomes stressful for him. Whatever you do, just remain patient with him… think of him as a child.”

Howie nodded, not liking the new information on his best friend. He didn’t want to think and treat him as a child, nor did he want him to endure this pain. He looked back over at Brian, who was smiling at him and nodding for him to go. “Go on, I have to make a call anyway, I’ll be sure to see him later, when the time is right.”

Howie smiled, and with the help of Dr. McNorton, he got off of his bed and was about to sit down in the wheelchair, but he stopped himself. “I’ll walk it doc…”

Dr. McNorton eyed him for a while, not sure if that would be the best thing to do. “You sure?”

“Yeah,” he replied with a nod, and with that, they both walked out of the room, closing the door behind them.

Brian sighed, his head lolling back on the pillow. He found himself staring up at the ceiling; everything was silent, too silent for him. He grabbed the remote that was attached to the side of his bed and had clicked the TV on.

Immediately, the DVD menu came on, and whatever was in the DVD player began to play. It was their Greatest Hits DVD, and it had picked up from where he and Howie left off when they were watching their music videos. Ironically, it picked up on “I’ll Never Break Your Heart” music video.

From the first day, that I saw your smiling face. His eyes drifted close and memories of when he and Leighanne first met flooded his mind. Honey I knew that we would be, together forever. It was on the set of “As Long As You Love Me”, her brilliant smile striking blonde hair caught his eye. When I asked you out, you said no, but I found out. He would always act so strange whenever she was around, but he later realized that acting strange was better than not having her around at all. Darling that you’d been hurt, you thought that you’d never love again.

He was just a crazy fool, a fool who was in love. He couldn’t explain quite well to the fellas, all he knew was that he saw eternity within her eyes. I deserve a try honey, just once, give me a chance and I’ll prove this all wrong. He took the plunge; he asked her out, which was the first step into forever. You walked in, you were so quick to judge, but honey he’s nothing like me.

He needed to call her now. I’ll never break your heart. But for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to even pick up the phone to make the call. I’ll never make you cry. He took a deep breath in, and picked up the phone, punching in the area code, followed by the seven digits. I’d rather die, than live without you. His heart rate quickened, someone picked up the phone.

“Hello?” I’ll give you all of me, honey, that’s no lie.

“Leighanne?”

He took it slow, step by step, passing by other wandering elder patients who would smile at him. He would smile back of course, thanking God that they were older and oblivious to the fact that they were superstars.

“Here we are.” Dr. McNorton announced, taking out his work card and swiping it through a pad that was on the side of the door. He punched in a few numbers and then there was a “click” sound, which indicated that the door was unlocked. He grabbed the knob and twisted it, pushing the door open far enough to allow Howie to walk through.

“I’ll be right out here if anything.” Dr. McNorton said, closing the door.

Howie nodded and had turned towards the bed that held his best friend. He slowly began to walk towards the bed, observing all the machines that were hooked up to AJ. As soon as he reached the side of the bed, he noticed that AJ was fast asleep, his chest rising and falling slowly. His appearance had changed over the weeks, no doubt about that. The goatee he would normally keep nicely trimmed was no longer there, his facial hair was growing freely. His normally tanned skin was now a bit pale, and his lips were cracked, the dried blood evident.

As he continued to observe his features, he didn’t realize that AJ was now awake, staring blankly at him. He looked up and seen AJ’s eyes open, and he backed away a bit, fearing that he would have another “outburst” episode.

AJ continued to stare at him, wondering why he had backed away. He slowly licked his cracked lips and cleared his throat. “D.?” he asked.

Howie froze from moving backwards, and a slow grin crept up on his face. “Jay?”

AJ smiled as well, “The one and only!”

Howie then walked back towards the bed, wanting to hug him, but not knowing what he could do without hurting him. AJ raised his hand slowly, holding it out towards him. Howie took his outstretched hand and shook it.

“Glad to have you back man.” Howie said with a smile.

AJ shrugged, “Well, feels good to be back…” he fell silent for a while, not really knowing what else he could say. “Look, I just want to apologize for how I was acting earlier… I, I don’t what got into me…”

Howie silenced him. “I’m not looking for apologies… don’t worry about it. But, if you don’t mind me asking, what do you remember so far?”

AJ fell silent; he had a feeling that that question would arise. “Well, I remember you… we have been best friends for as long as I can remember. For some reason, I remember going to rehab…” he fell silent once again.

“Is that all you can remember?”

AJ tried to think harder, but he remembered what Dr. Seid told him, and decided not to push it. “Well, beside the obvious, yeah… Dr. Seid did mention something about a Brian, I don’t know if I should know him or something.”

Howie closed his eyes, he remembered everything before the start of their career, and the only he was able to remember after the start of their career was going to rehab. He began to explain everything, from who Brian, Kevin and Nick were, to the explosion of their career as a vocal group, and most of what had happened in his life after that. He tried to explain to him the necessary things, without pushing all this new information onto all at once.

“Whoa…” AJ said, stunned at the chunk of his life he was oblivious to. “We finally made our dream come true, didn’t we Howie?”

Howie smiled and nodded, “Yeah… we did it buddy! Well, I’m gonna go back to my room now, let you get some more rest… but I’ll be back to see you, okay?” he grabbed AJ’s hand and shook it once more before he turned to leave the room.

“Howie, wait!” AJ called out. He was scared to let his best friend go, he didn’t want to lose memory of who he was again, and due to the fact that he was suffering from amnesia, he felt like he was facing this world all alone, and that’s the last feeling he wanted, the feeling of being all alone.

Howie turned just as he reached the door. “Yeah?”

AJ hesitated to say what he wanted to say, he didn’t want to sound childish, but he also didn’t want to stay here by himself. “Do you really have to go?”

Howie smiled. He was acting somewhat like the young kid he knew him to be years ago. AJ would always pull him to stay, he spent nearly his whole childhood alone with his mother and grandparents, and when he found Howie to be his best friend, he did everything he could to make sure that he would never lose his best friend and be alone again. “Yes, I do… but I will back, I promise you.”

“When will you be back?”

“Later on today…”

“When will I get to meet Brian, Kevin and Nick?”

“Whenever your ready buddy.”

AJ tried to think of one more question, and Howie could only chuckle at the antics he was pulling to try to keep him to stay. “One more question…”

“Yes AJ?”

“When can we go home?”

Howie’s heart dropped, he didn’t have an answer to that. “Time will tell Jay… time will tell.”

As soon as he hung up the phone, he took in a deep breath and had let his head fall back onto his pillow. There was a slight knock on the door, and a young looking nurse peered in through the crack of the open door.

“There’s someone here to see you.”

Brian stared at the nurse, puzzled. Who could possibly want to see him? It couldn’t be his family, they flew back to Kentucky to take care of family business, it couldn’t be Leighanne because he just got off the phone with her. The door was pushed all the way open, revealing Nick who was sitting in a wheelchair. Brian simply smiled, but his smile faded when flashes of Aaron came into mind.

“Hey Rok!” Nick said with a smile, the nurse pushing him into the room.

“Hey.” Brian whispered, not wanting anymore surprise visits from Aaron. “What are you doing here?”

The nurse situated his wheelchair beside Brian’s bed. He shrugged to his question, “I had to get out of that damn room… I asked my doctor if I could visit you and Howie, and he said yeah, said it’d be good for me to get out for a while without overdoing it. Speaking of which, where’s Howie.”

“He went to visit AJ… he’s conscious you know.”

“Really?” Nick asked him, a smile beaming through. “Is he going to be okay? How is he?”

“From what I last heard, he doesn’t remember much of anything. He doesn’t remember the accident, he doesn’t remember our career. He remembers everything that happened before our career, which includes Howie. As for us, it’ll take him time to remember who we are. The only recent event he remembers is his trip to rehab.”

Nick just stared at him in shock, this wasn’t possible. “What do you mean it’ll take time for him to remember who we are?”

Brian shrugged, “Well, from what Dr. McNorton says, he’s suffering a mild case of amnesia, and even though he doesn’t remember some things, it’s not as if he has lost his memory forever. Things will come back to him in due time, and from what he says, his memory should come back to him in episodes.”

Nick shook his head, not liking Brian’s newly learned medical lingo. “What? What do you mean episodes?”

“He said that we need to think of his brain as a TV show, and his memory as the episodes. Certain words and objects should bring back his memory. He told us that he had said the word “rehab”, and that word alone brought back AJ’s memory of his trip to rehab. He told us it’s good to bring up things to him, it’ll help him to remember, but he also told us not to push everything on him at once. Forcing him to remember can be painful for him, even lethal.”

Nick looked away, not wanting to believe the new information. “Whoa… you have got to be kidding me!”

Brian shook his head, “Nope… wish I could say that this was all a joke myself…”

“So… he only remembers Howie because he had met him before we became famous?”

“Yups.” Brian replied, nodding his head. “I’m just glad that he hasn’t lost his memory forever. How about you though? Did the doctor say anything about you?”

Nick shrugged, “Well, he didn’t say much. My ribs are healing quite well, I can move normally, I can turn slightly to the sides, but bending my abdominal area is the problem. My broken nose will heal, even though I will continue to sound like some weird stuff-up kid for the next couple weeks or so.” They both chuckled. “And in a couple of days, I should be able to remove the stitches from my head. What about you?”

“Dr. McNorton said that he will remove my stitches either tomorrow or the next day, and after that, he said he’ll keep me in for another day or two to observe, and then he’ll be able to discharge me.”

“That’s great news!” Nick said with a smile, but deep inside, he didn’t want Brian to leave. For some reason, he felt that it wouldn’t be safe if he left while the others were still in here. Plus, he wanted to leave the same time as he did. “What about Howie?”

“Same for him… they’ll remove his stitches, keep an eye on him for a day or two, and then release him. Looks like you, Kevin and AJ will be in here for quite some time.”

Nick groaned, “Oh hell no, I’m gonna go ask the doctor if they can release me the same day as you and Howie. Ain’t no way I’m gonna be staying here…”

Brian laughed, “Hey, did you know that Kevin was conscious as well?”

Nick nodded, “Yeah, I had asked the nurse about you guys when she came to get me. She said that both you and Howie were doing fine and Kevin was conscious. She didn’t know anything about AJ, so she wasn’t able to tell me.”

Brian nodded as well and looked away. Nick tried to look him in the eyes, but Brian kept avoiding his look. “Hey.” Nick called out, trying to catch Brian’s attention. “What’s the matter Rok?”

Brian looked back up at him and shook his head. “Just thinking about how this all happened, you know?” he lied. He couldn’t tell him that he was actually thinking about his dead younger brother. “I mean… it all happened so fast.”

Nick chuckled, “Hey man, at least you were asleep through the whole ordeal, both Howie and I…” he froze mid-sentence, his memory of the accident flooded his brain. Both he and Howie had carried Brian’s unconscious body out from the bus wreckage. He then jumped out to look for Aaron, and Howie had followed him. They both got to the bottom, where the back half of the bus was, looking for Aaron, Kevin and AJ. They found Kevin on the ground, but AJ and Aaron were nowhere to be seen.

“Oh god…” Nick gasped.

Brian’s eyes widened, fearing Nick’s new odd behavior. “Nick… what’s the matter?”

There was a man standing behind them, he was holding a gun to Howie’s head. Nick turned around and was about to lunge at him, but the man threatened to kill Howie. He was ordered to turn back around and walk into the bus, and when he complied, the man struck Howie in the back of the head with the butt of his gun. Nick turned around just in time to see the man aiming his gun at Howie’s head, preparing to shoot. He ran full force towards the man, only to be kicked in the face. The man continued to beat him up until his body fell limp, little did the man know that it took time for him to fall unconscious, and he had heard everything that was said.

“This was no accident.” Nick finally replied. “Brian, someone tried to murder us.”

Brian just stared at him as if he was crazy. “What are you talking about? Who tried to murder us?”

“I don’t know!” Nick snapped back. He didn’t mean to sound harsh, but he was irritated with the fact that Brian wasn’t believing him. “All I know was that we were ran off the road, the bus didn’t lose control from a popped tire. This man, whoever the hell he is, popped our tire after the incident to make it look like an accident. The bus was wrecked so bad, officials wouldn’t have thought anything more of the situation. It looked like it was a complete accident, he planned this out so well.”

Brian was afraid of the way Nick was talking now. How in the hell did he know all of this? “He’s gonna be back…” Nick continued. “He said he’d be back to finish us off. He started this, he was the cause of all of this, and he won’t stop until he finishes what he had started.”

Brian was about to ask him another question, until a memory of his had flooded back. He remembered hearing Kevin and AJ’s voice. His eyes were closed, but his senses were alert. He heard AJ asking Nick what had happened to him, and then had said something about getting up to get a cloth to clean off blood on Nick’s head. The bus jerked again when something had slammed into it’s side, throwing them off guard. AJ had asked what was going on, Kevin said that someone was trying to run them off the road. “Oh god, your right.” Brian muttered.

Nick nodded, turning to look at the closed door. “I need to go and check on Aaron.” Brian’s heart stopped. “I need to make sure that he’s okay.”

There was a loud beeping noise that filled the room all of a sudden. Nick quickly turned back towards the bed, seeing Brian’s body tense up. Brian was hyperventilating, he couldn’t breathe, it was as if the room was slowly closing in on him. That’s when he realized that his heart had stopped, literally, or at least trying to. He could feel his eyes begin to roll in the back of his head, his chest began to hurt so much.

“Oh my god, Brian!” Nick shouted, shooting up from the wheelchair to reach for the nurse call button. He frantically pushed the button over and over, never breaking his attention from Brian. He grabbed Brian’s face in his hands, forcing him to look at him.

“Brian… Brian, look at me!” Nick exclaimed, trying to capture his attention.

But Brian didn’t respond. His eyes remained in the back of his head, white orbs being revealed through the slits of his eyelids. “Breathe Brian, breathe…” Nick encouraged, noticing that Brian was preventing himself from taking a breath in. He knew Brian was going into cardiac arrest, he just didn’t know what he could do to help him until the doctors came.

He turned towards the closed door, later realizing that no one was coming. He took a deep breath in and rushed over towards the closed door, ripping it open. “Help!” he shouted. “Someone help me.”

An elderly patient was in the hallway at the time, passing by the room. “What seems to be the problem child?” the elderly woman asked him.

“My friend’s gone into cardiac arrest, I need help, now!”

The woman gasped. “Oh dear.” She turned around, looking for someone she could call to help, that’s when she seen her personal nurse running towards them.

“Mrs. Peters, what did I tell you about leaving your room by yourself?” the male nurse asked, gently grabbing her by the arm to help her back to her room.

“No.” she said, pulling her wrinkly arm out of his grasp. “This young man needs help Charles, his friend has gone into cardiac arrest.

Charles, the male nursed looked at Nick with wide eyes. “Is this true?”

Nick nodded, “Yes, he’s in there, he won’t breathe.”

Charles pushed past Nick, walking into the room towards where Brian was. “Sir, do me a favor and stay out there with Mrs. Peters.” he pulled out a walkie-talkie from his pants. “I need a doctor to room G103 stat. We have a patient in cardiac arrest, I repeat, patient in cardiac arrest.”

Couple seconds later, a doctor and a female nurse rushed into the room. Nick began to back away until he felt his back hit the wall, tears began to prick his eyes. Dr. McNorton then ran into the room, observing what was going on. When he noticed that the other doctor was getting things under control, he walked back out, towards Nick.

“What happened Nick?”

Nick shrugged, his eyes becoming glassy from his welling tears. “I don’t know, we were talking, and then he just tensed up. I didn’t know what was wrong with him at first, but when I realized that he was keeping himself from breathing, that’s when I realized that he was going into cardiac arrest.”

Dr. McNorton nodded. “Well, we need to get you back to your room.”

But Nick shook his head. “No… I’m not going anywhere until I know that he’ll be okay.”

Dr. McNorton wanted to protest, but he knew there was no use in doing so. He simply sighed and nodded, agreeing to let him slide this one time. He turned and had walked back into the room, closing the door behind him. Nick closed his eyes, finally allowing the tears to slip out. He began to pound the back of his head on the wall behind him, later regretting it when pain began to course throughout his whole body.

Mrs. Peters looked up at him, “Don’t beat yourself up over this boy… you need to believe that your friend will pull through.”

Nick licked his trembling lips, knowing that the lady was right. Brian was a fighter, he’s pull through many obstacles in his life, why should this be any different? “I know…” he whispered.

Mrs. Peters stood there for a while, not knowing what to say or do. Finally, she reached her hand out towards his, grabbing it and squeezing it gently. Nick sighed when he felt her wrinkly hand squeeze his, feeling her warmth and support. “Not to worry son… I had to sit there and watch my husband suffer heart attacks almost everyday. I remained by his side, until his dying day. My husband was a fighter, always defining the odds, but one day, he finally decided to answer God’s call, and all I could do was sit there and help guide him towards the light. You boys have so much ahead of you, believe me, it’s not his time yet. But if you run away, he just might answer God a little too early, thinking he was left all alone.”

More tears began to fall from his eyes, what this woman was saying made a lot of sense. The door open, revealing the two doctors and the two nurses. Dr. McNorton and Charles approached them while the other doctor and nurse walked away, going back to wherever they were before.

“How is he doc?”

Dr. McNorton sighed, “Well, we were able to bring him back and stabilize him. Right now he’s resting of course, and we want to keep him as calm and tranquil as possible.”

Mrs. Peters looked up at Nick and smiled, “You see son? God works in marvelous ways… your friend is just like my husband, a true fighter. And your just like me… a true friend. Hang in there honey, and may god bless you both.”

She reached out and grabbed Charles’ hand, allowing him to walk her back towards her room. Nick smiled, watching as both Charles and Mrs. Peters began to walk down the hall, but then he looked back towards Dr. McNorton. “Do you know what caused this?”

Dr. McNorton shrugged, “Stress could be a high factor, but I just don’t know. Just whatever you do, try to keep him as calm as possible, and make sure that he doesn’t get riled up in anyway. Now, lets get you back to your room.”

As soon as Howie closed AJ’s door, he sighed. There was so much going on for them right now. Not only did they have to worry about AJ”s amnesia, but they also had to worry about Nick and how and when they were going to tell him that his younger brother was dead. He began to walk away, realizing that Dr. McNorton was no longer there. He shrugged it off though and decided to walk his way to his room by himself.

As he continued to walk, he stopped in front of another ICU room, the room that belonged to Kevin. He hadn’t heard any news on him yet. He stood in front of the door, looking into the room through the window in the door. He couldn’t see much, just Kevin lying on his bed, still unconscious. All of a sudden, the door opened, revealing a doctor.

“Can I help you sir?” the doctor asked.

Howie shook his head, “No… just stopping by to check up on my friend, that’s all.”

“Oh, and which Backstreet Boy would you be?”

“Howie Dorough.”

The doctor smiled and reached out his hand. “Mr. Dorough, I’m Dr. Seid, and I’m the neurologist who has been keeping watch over Mr. Richardson and Alexander McLean. Those two are quite some interesting fellas. They’re both pulling through fine, and they’re both expected to make a full recovery.”

Howie’s eyes widened. “You mean to tell me that Kevin is conscious again?”

Dr. Seid smiled and nodded, “Yes sir, he has awoken from his comatose state earlier today. He’s talking and moving slightly, doing better than I expected. The only thing we’re keeping a watch on is his head, since we had to drain fluids and all. His leg and ribs seem to be healing quite well, and it’ll take some time till both he and Alex will be released.”

Howie couldn’t wipe the grin off of his face, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “If it’s not too much, do you mind if I go in and see him?”

Dr. Seid shook his head, stepping to the side. “Don’t mind at all. He’s been resting for a while, it’ll be good for him to awake to seeing a friend. I’ll have you know, unlike AJ, he remembers his past, the only thing he doesn’t remember is the accident and everything that happened before it. We explained to him what had happened of course, but it’s not as if he would be able to tell you exactly what happened, because he doesn’t remember a thing. Other then that, his memory is still in tact.”

Howie nodded and began to walk into the room, Dr. Seid closing the door behind him. Kevin opened one eye, peeking through the slit. “Hey D.” he whispered hoarsely.

Howie smiled and approached his bedside. “Hey big guy… how you holding up?”

Kevin shrugged, “Pretty good, if I do say so myself. I just feel a constant throbbing sensation in my head, leg and ribs… you know, pain I can deal with.”

Howie chuckled, “Yeah, you can deal with anything! So, who did you see so far?”

“My wife… she had left though, said she’d be back. Other than her, you were my only other visitor for today.”

“Well, don’t I feel special!” Howie replied with a grin. Kevin laughed. “We were all waiting on you buddy, Brian, Nick and I have been conscious for quite some time now, it was you and AJ who gave us the biggest scare. AJ had pulled through and had woke up before you though.”

“What and who does he remember so far?”

“Well,” Howie sighed. “He remembers his life before we started our career. The only recent event he remembers is his stint in rehab.”

Kevin began to frown. “So… he doesn’t remember us?”

“The only person he remembers is me… due to the fact that we had befriended way before the explosion of our career. I had to explain what we did, how, why and when we became a vocal group and what we have accomplished together in our lives so far. But not to worry, AJ hasn’t lost his memory forever, he’s only suffered a mild case of amnesia, losing his memory only temporarily. In time he will gain his memory back, not all at once, but in segments. It is our job to help him remember by showing him things. Anything can strike his brain and cause his memory to come back at any second. Anything from music, to saying a simple word. It is important though that we remain patient with him. We can’t feed all this information to him at one time, it can become painful for him, even lethal.”

Before Kevin could say anything in reply, the door to the room opened, both Dr. Seid and Dr. McNorton standing behind it. “May I have a word with you Howie?” Dr. McNorton had asked.

Howie’s eyes widened. “Why, what happened? Did something happen to somebody?”

“Calm down Mr. Dorough.” Dr. Seid said. “He just needs to have a word with you in regards to Brian Littrell.”

“Brian Littrell?” Kevin repeated. “Look, whatever he has to say to Howie about Brian, he can say it in front of me because Brian is my cousin.”

Dr. McNorton took a deep breath in and sighed, shoving his hands into the pockets of his white lab coat. “Brian suffered a heart attack not too long ago.” Both Howie and Kevin gasped. “Not to worry though, he’s stabilized and is resting right now, but we wanted to know if it’d be a problem if we moved you to room with Nick. Brian needs all the rest he can get, and we feel it’d be best if he spent his time alone.”

Howie shook his head, shocked at the new information, but relieved with the fact that Brian was still okay. “There’s no problem doctor…”

Dr. McNorton nodded, “Great, if you don’t mind, I’d like to get you situated in your new room while Dr. Seid works with Kevin.”

Howie turned back towards Kevin and shook his hand, “I’ll be back to see you later man.”

Kevin smiled, “Well, I’ll be here… you know good and well I ain’t go nowhere!”

Howie smiled as well and shook his head at his crazy antics. Both he and Dr. McNorton began to walk down the hall towards the elevator. Once they entered and the door slid shut, he began to think of what he had gotten himself into by agreeing to room with Nick. What was he to say if he decided to ask him about Aaron?

His eyes fluttered open, the rays of light piercing through his closed eyelids. He was lying on something hard and warm, the warmth feeling exquisite, but the hardness was a pain. He pushed himself up from where he laid, realizing that he was in the middle of a basketball courts.

“What the…” he muttered, standing up and looking around, finding no one in sight. He turned in a complete circle, seeing no sign of life, no birds, no bugs, nothing.

“Heads up.” a voice suddenly said.

He turned towards the source of the voice, only to have a basketball chucked at his chest. It was tossed at him quite gently, so he was able to catch it within his arms. He continued to stare at the basketball he had in his arms, but when he looked up, he saw Aaron standing there, smiling at him.

“What’s the matter?” Aaron had asked him, his smile beaming through. “Getting too old for basketball?”

Brian had let the basketball drop from his arms, staring at Aaron with wide eyes. “Aaron?”

Aaron walked towards him, bending down to pick up the basketball. “In the flesh… what’s wrong Brian? You’re looking a little pale, you okay?”

“But, but…” Brian began to stutter. “You’re dead!”

Aaron chuckled, “Well, thanks for reminding me! You know, people perceive ghost totally wrong. I remember I used to think that ghost were nothing but evil spirits that would linger in your closet or under your bed, and they would pop out and scare you by saying ‘boo’! But that’s not the case at all. I mean, look at me!”

“Why do you keep doing this to me?” Brian had asked him. “Why am I the only one who can see you, and you only show up when they bring up the fact that we should tell Nick about your death. Nick gave me a damn heart attack because he mentioned your name, do you enjoying doing this to me?”

The bright smile fell from Aaron’s face, and was replaced with a stern look. “No Brian, I don’t enjoy causing you pain. I don’t mean to scare the hell out of you when you see me. It wasn’t Nick who gave you a heart attack… it was yourself. He thinks I’m still alive, and he can’t help it if he’s own best friend won’t even tell him that I’m gone.”

Brian shook his head, “I can’t do that… I can’t tell him right now. You don’t understand Aaron; he’s not strong enough to bear with the fact that you’re dead. You of all people should know how Nick is. I will tell him when the time is right; he’s just not that strong right now.”

Aaron just stared at him, but then turned to look away. He tossed the basketball to the side and walked over towards a bench, sitting down on it and stretching himself out. “Funny… when you went into cardiac arrest, Nick was strong enough to get up and try to help you. He even ran out of the room to look for help. Nick is stronger than you think he is. He’s your best friend Brian, he didn’t care about himself at that moment, all he cared about was helping you. Why won’t you be his best friend and tell him the truth? I don’t think it’s the fact that Nick isn’t strong enough to know, I think you’re not strong enough to tell him.”

Brian remained silent, he was right. Aaron continued, “If you wait any longer to tell him, you will lose him.”

Brian looked up at him. “What do you mean I’d lose him?”

“What do you think it means?”

He rose up from the bench, bending over to grab the basketball he had tossed to the side earlier. “So, are you up for a little one-on-one?”

Brian smiled for the first time. “You know it!”

Nick closed his eyes, trying hard to fall asleep, but the earlier events wouldn’t allow him to do so. Watching Brian go into cardiac arrest was scary as hell, but the conversation they had before was even scarier. Knowing that there was a killer on the loose, looking for them put him on the edge.

His thoughts were broken when the door opened, revealing Howie and Dr. McNorton. “Here you go Howie, all set and ready for you.”

Howie nodded and began to walk towards the empty bed beside Nick while Dr. McNorton closed the door. Nick just watched Howie as he slowly and steadily got himself into the bed, trying to make himself comfortable. Once he was situated, he looked to the side at Nick, “Hey!”

“Hey.” Nick replied with a smile. “Don’t mind staying with me, do you?”

Howie smiled as well, shaking his head in response. “Not at all… you need some company anyway.”

They both fell silent for a while, not knowing what to say. “What happened?” Howie finally asked, breaking the silence.

Nick looked over to him and shrugged, “Wish I could tell you, Dr. McNorton doesn’t even know the reason, though he says stress could very well be a good reason. Both Brian and I were just talking to each other, and before I knew it, he went into cardiac arrest. What I want to know, if it was stress that caused this, then what had got him so worried and worked up.”

“Maybe the affect of the accident was getting to him.” Howie suggested with a shrug.

“That could be a…” Nick froze mid-sentence. “D.,do you remember anything from the accident?”

Howie tried to think. “To tell you the truth, no… how come?”

“Cause both Brian and I remember everything… well, most of everything. After the accident, both you and I became conscious, and we had helped Brian out of the bus, do you remember that?”

Howie remained silent, thinking harder and trying to retrace back to the accident. “I do remember that, but that’s about it.”

“There was someone after us Howie, he was the reason why our bus crashed. He caused the accident himself, running us off the road, and then he popped the tires to make it look like a accident. Both you and I went towards the back half of the bus that was a little further down from where we were, and the guy had held you at gun point.”

Howie’s eyes widened. “Your right… he knocked me in the back of the head with the butt of his gun.”

Nick nodded, “He then beat the living shit out of me, the only thing was that I didn’t fall unconscious right away. I was conscious enough to hear what was said. He said he’d be back to finish things off, then he darted off. Everyone thinks that this whole thing was an accident… we need to tell them that someone tried to murder us.”

“But who?” Howie had asked him. “Who’ll believe us? They’ll probably just think that we’re delusional and we don’t know what we’re talking about.”

But Nick shook his head, “No… someone’s gotta listen. They weren’t there when the crash happened, we were… now that most of us remember bits and pieces, we’ll put it together and create one hell of a story they won’t deny. We just need to talk to AJ and Kevin.”

“They both don’t remember anything of the accident.”

Nick rolled his eyes and sighed, he forgot about that. “Well, it’s up to us three… just you, me and Brian.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Are you sure this is all that you remember?” Dr. McNorton had asked, writing down everything Nick and Howie had to tell him about the accident. “It’s crucial that you tell me everything right now, so I can alert authorities.”

Both Howie and Nick nodded. “That’s about it…”

Dr. McNorton placed his pen down on his papers and began to massage his temples. “I’ll tell you fellas right now, the scene of the wreckage truly looked like it was all an accident. It looks exactly how people are perceiving the story to be. The bus tire popped, the driver lost control and swerved right off the road, tumbling down.”

“Well, we’re telling you right now doc that this was no accident. Brian, Howie and I remember mostly everything that either happened before, during or after the accident. Brian remembers hearing Kevin tell AJ that someone was trying to run us off the road. Howie remembers this guy knocking him in the back of his head with his gun. I remember this man beating the hell out of me and saying that he’d be back to finish his business.”

Dr. McNorton nodded, gathering his papers and placing it in his clipboard. “I did not say anything about not believing you. All I’m saying is that this story will be hard to present to the officials without them questioning you all severely. I don’t think any of you are ready and willing for a bunch of officers cramping into your room to juice answers out of you. Not only will it be mentally tiring for you all, but physically as well. If you ask me, your all not ready for this sort of thing.”

He had a point. But at the same time, Nick was also trying to make his point, and that was the fact that their killer was still on the loose. “I understand that Dr. McNorton, but if you ask me, I’m willing to go to any extent and take any chances if it means that it’ll keep us protected from whoever this man is.”

Dr. McNorton continued to stare at them, then he rose from his seat, which was situated between the two beds. “As you wish…” and with that, he walked out of the room.

A couple days passed, and both Howie and Nick were discharged from the hospital. The doctors decided to keep Brian in a little longer, due to the fact that they wanted to keep an eye on his heart.

“So… where are we going now?” Howie had asked.

Nick shrugged, “I don’t know… where you do you want to go?”

“Well, my parents are flying in tomorrow to come and see me… I won’t be going with them, but at the same time, I want to stay somewhere near here… and must I need to tell you the reason why?”

Nick shook his head and sighed, they weren’t going far away from their brothers, knowing that their killer was still out there, looking for them. “Well, we can rent a place or something… we’ll think of something later, right now I gotta make a call.”

Nick began to walk towards the payphones that were in the hallway of the hospital waiting room, Howie following close behind. Nick patted his pockets, looking for spare change, but he came out empty handed. He looked over to Howie. “What in the hell happened to all our stuff on the bus?”

Howie shrugged, “They might’ve salvaged what they could…”

Nick shrugged as well and picked up the phone, deciding to call collect. He waited as the phone continued to ring and ring, soon an electronic recorder came on. “Please say your name in which you want the caller to identify you by after the beep.”

“Nick Carter.” he replied after he heard the beep.

Once again, everything fell silent as the phone continued to ring. Finally after what seemed like minutes, someone picked up the phone. “Nick? Is that you?”

Nick could only laugh as he heard his sister’s voice. “Yes Angel, how are you baby girl?”

The phone fell silent and he could hear sobs wrack his sister’s body. “God Nick, we were all so worried about you… mom hardly got any sleep, and dad came back to help her out. We’re sorry we couldn’t fly down there to see you, there’s just been so many things that were going on at the same time…”

Nick tried to calm her blabbering down. “Sweetie, sweetie… it’s okay, honestly… I know you all were going through a lot. I just called to say that I was discharged from the hospital today… is mom around by any chance?”

“No, she and dad is at the funeral home…”

Nick’s face twisted in confusion. “What would she want at the funeral home? Did somebody die?”

Angel fell silent. “Nick… you don’t remember what happened?”

Nick was starting to get scared now. “No Angel, I don’t remember what happened… I don’t even know what your talking about. Just explain to me what this is all about, because your starting to scare me.”

Angel began to cry hysterically, she couldn’t get a word out of her mouth. Nick pulled the phone away from his ear and just stared at it as if it had bit him. “Angel.” he called out. “Angel, c’mon now… calm down and tell me what happened.”

“Aaron is dead Nick…”

Nick’s heart stopped, the world began to spin around him. “Funny Angel… now really, give the phone to mom, I’m not in the mood to play games.”

“It’s no f***ing joke Nick, Aaron is dead!” she shouted.

Nick could only stand there, frozen to the spot. “When… when did this happen?” he stuttered.

“The accident… your bus accident. He was on the bus with you guys… he died instantly.”

Howie could only turn to look away, he knew that Angel had just told him that Aaron was dead, has been dead for a while now. Nick’s chest began to heave, there was so much emotion running through him at that moment, he didn’t know if he wanted to cry, yell, scream, or get angry. The phone simply fell out of his hands and he began to hyperventilate.

“Nick…” Howie whispered, slowly making his way over towards Nick’s trembling form.

As soon as Howie got by his side, he immediately dropped to the floor, Howie darting his arms out to catch him. He began to do everything at once, yell, scream and cry. Howie tried to hold him, but Nick kept pushing him away.

“Get the f*** of me D.!” Nick shouted as he pushed Howie away and shot up from the ground. He picked up the dangling phone and began to slam it into the wall, not caring that people were staring at him as if he was crazy. Howie rose as well and tried to grab the phone out of his hands, but Nick kept pushing him away.

Once Howie was able to take the phone out of his grasp, Nick began to punch the wall, wanting to feel physical pain to take away his emotional pain.

“C’mere Nick…” Howie said as he grabbed him in a tight embrace, trying to calm him down.

“No!” Nick shouted, shoving Howie roughly away. “You told me no one died… you f***ing told me that no one died Howie… you f***ing lied to me, how the f*** could you not tell me that my own f***ing brother was dead?” Nick screamed in his face.

Howie felt tears prick his eyes, but he refused to let it fall before Nick. “I… we were gonna tell you Nick, but we didn’t…”

Nick put his hand up to stop him from talking. “Save it… just f***ing save it D., cause I don’t want to hear what you f***ing have to say. You lied to me… that’s that… you all f***ing lied to me.” and with that, he resumed punching the wall again, letting out his anger, sadness and frustration.

It wasn’t long till a security guard and a doctor approached them, but Howie waved them off. “Your gonna have to pay for that damage, you know.” the doctor retorted.

Howie only nodded and grabbed for Nick again, and this time, Nick didn’t fight him off. Instead, he melted within his arms, crying hysterically and letting it all out.

“I’m so sorry Nick…” Howie apologized. “Both Brian and I…”

But Nick cut him off by pushing him away. That name hit his heart hard… his very best friend didn’t even bother to tell him that his younger brother was dead when he knew this whole time. He began to walk towards the elevator, leaving Howie behind. As soon as he got on the elevator, he thought of what he was going to say and do once he got to Brian’s room.

Brian snapped his head when his door busted open and he seen Nick standing there, anger and sadness dancing in
his eyes.

The nurse that was in the room taking Brian’s stats looked up as well, startled. “Can I help you sir?”

“Out, now!” was all Nick said in reply, never breaking his glare from Brian.

The nurse hesitated to leave, but Nick’s hand shot out and grabbed her by her upper arm, pulling her away from the bed suddenly but gently.

“Have you lost your damn mind?” Brian asked him, trying to raise himself up off the bed.

Nick pointed towards him. “You stay right there…” he turned back to the nurse. “Out now… and make sure no one comes into this room.”

The nurse looked back at Brian, as if waiting for his answer. Brian simply nodded, letting her know that everything would okay and that she could leave. The truth was everything was not going to be okay and he did not want her to leave anywhere. As soon as the nurse walked out of the room and had closed the door behind her, Nick rushed up to the bed.

“I thought you and Howie left already.” Brian remarked, not knowing exactly why he was there and not saying anything, so he took it upon himself to say something.

“Yeah well, I thought you were my best friend.”

Brian continued to stare at him in puzzlement, what did he mean he thought he was his best friend? He was for crying out loud, or at least the last time he could remember. “What are you talking about?”

Nick grabbed the collar of Brian’s hospital gown and had yanked him forward, pulling him in close to his face. “You know damn well what I am talking about… what; did you think I would never find out that my own brother was dead?”

Brian’s eyes widened. “No Nick… I was going to tell you, but…”

“But!” Nick exclaimed, cutting him off. “That’s all I heard from you and Howie… but this, but that! What are you gonna say? You were gonna tell me when the time was right? You knew I was looking for him Brian! This whole time I thought he was alive while both you and Howie knew he was dead all along! He was the only hope I had left Brian… the only reason I looked forward to getting discharged so I could visit him and make sure he was safe, but no, this whole time he wasn’t okay… he was f***ing dead! And you both kept it from me… you both lied to me, telling me that no one died. How could you f***ing do that to me Brian?”

At this point, tears were flowing freely from Brian’s eyes. “I didn’t mean to Nick, I swear to you. If we would have told you while you were still recuperating, we knew you would’ve beaten yourself up over the situation. You needed to give your body and mind time to heal, and we knew if we told you at that moment you wouldn’t have allowed that process to happen.”

Nick roughly pulled Brian up off the bed, dismissing the fact that the IV was literally ripped out of his arm. He tried to stand Brian up on the ground, but when he realized that Brian’s legs were too weak to support his weight, he pinned him up against the wall. “Don’t you f***ing tell me what’s best for me… your not my f***ing parents. You’re supposed to be my best friend, someone who would never keep anything from me, especially when they know your brother’s dead. So I’m asking you again Brian… how the f*** could you do this to me?”

Brian fell silent; he didn’t have a true answer. On second thought, he did. He was too busy telling Nick that he wasn’t ready, when this whole time; he wasn’t ready to tell… Aaron had made him realize that. “I was afraid to tell you…” he whispered.

Nick pulled him forward and had slammed him back into the wall. Brian winced when he felt the back of his head hit the wall full force. “I didn’t hear you! What the f*** did you say?”

“I was afraid to tell you!” Brian shouted this time, crying hysterically. “I was afraid to tell you because I didn’t want to lose you… I didn’t want you to shut me out Nick. I know you better than anybody in this damn group, and I knew how you would’ve been if I had told you earlier. I didn’t want you to go through more pain when you were busy dealing with what had happened. I was going to tell you Nick… I swear to you.”

Nick began to cry as well, but he held his grip on Brian’s collar, keeping him pinned to the wall. “You already f***ing lost Brian…” he sneered. “You f***ing lost everything from me… my trust, my friendship, and most of all… you f***ing lost me!” and with that, he used the other hand he wasn’t holding Brian with and had punched the wall behind him, right near Brian’s head.

Brian shut his eyes tightly, wincing when he heard the sickening crack of Nick’s knuckles meeting the wall. It was so close to his head, that the sound alone sounded like a gun shot. The force of his fist was so hard, he could feel the vibration in the back of his head from the wall, and the wind from the impact was tremendous. He released his grasp on Brian on purpose because he knew his legs weren’t strong enough to support him. He simply stood there and watched as Brian immediately collapsed to the ground, not caring to help him back up onto his bed. He turned and roughly pushed the door open, briskly walking past the nurse and Howie who was standing there in shock.

Howie sprung into action and rushed into the room, kneeling down before Brian, meanwhile the nurse slowly walked in, surveying the damage.

“Hey…” Howie whispered, trying to break Brian out of his trance. “Brian, look at me man… what happened?”

Brian didn’t say anything for a while. He simply remained silent and continued to stare straight forward, not bothering to look at Howie or the nurse. “Who told him?” was all he asked.

Howie sighed, “Angel… he called home and had asked for his mom. Angel told him that both her and Bob was at the funeral home, from there on she explained everything to him.”

“Oh god.” The nurse suddenly gasped.

That broke Brian out of his trance because both he and Howie looked up to see what had made the nurse so startled. She was staring at the bed, and when they looked down to where she was staring, then seen a pool of blood staining the sheets. Their eyes followed the trail of blood, which lead from the bed, down off the side and to the ground and straight to Brian’s bloody arm.

Howie gasped as well and gently grabbed Brian’s arm, trying to see where he was bleeding from. “What in the hell did he do to you?”

Brian pulled his arm away and began to wipe the blood away with his bare hand. “Nothing, the IV was just pulled out from my arm, that’s all.”

The nurse walked up with a hand towel, handing it to Brian. “He’s bleeding a lot because the needle was pulled so roughly from his vein… nothing life threatening, we’re just going to have to stop the bleeding and probe your other arm for a vein we can place the IV in.

While Brian was busy wiping the blood off his arm, both Howie and the nurse began to clean up the mess, Howie wiping the blood off the floor while the nurse took off the bloody sheets and replaced it with fresh, warm, crisp sheets. Howie helped Brian off the ground and had walked him to the bathroom to clean him up. Once they were able to get the blood under control, they changed him into a new hospital gown and had helped him back into bed.

Howie looked to the side and seen a gaping whole in the wall. Brian looked over towards the wall as well, “He punched it…” he replied, as if answering Howie’s thoughts.

Howie looked back at him, watching him as his eyes began to drift shut. “Where did he go?” Brian had asked in a barely audible voice.

Howie shrugged, “I don’t really know…”

Brian’s eyes were becoming heavy by the second. “Please keep an eye on him Howie…” and with that, he fell asleep.

Howie grabbed Brian’s hand and squeezed it slightly. “Don’t worry… I will.”

“Here you go sweetie, meatloaf with rice and vegetables!” the nurse enthusiastically said as she placed tray of hot food before AJ.

AJ cringed as he caught whiff of his generic meal. The way the nurse had made it sound like it was the best food in the world had made him sick to his stomach. The nurse lifted up the lid off his plate, which revealed one scoop of rice, steamed mixed vegetables, and two slabs of brownish, red meat drenched in gravy. If he hadn’t known better, he would’ve thought this to be crap mixed with diarrhea.

AJ looked up and gave the nurse a crooked smile. “Thanks.”

The nurse smiled back. “No problem.” And with that, she walked out of the room.

AJ stared at the door when he noticed that she didn’t close it, she simply stood there talking someone, but the half closed door was blocking his view of seeing whom she was talking to. A couple seconds later, the nurse pushed the door open again and had allowed Howie to walk in.

“Hey!” AJ said as the nauseating thought of his food was dismissed.

Howie approached his bed and smiled. “Hey yourself. How you doing?”

AJ shrugged and looked down at his plate of food. “Could be better if they didn’t have to feed me this s*** they call food. And how about you? How does it feel to be free from the hospital?”

Howie sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Not as good as I thought it would feel. You remember me telling you about Nick?”

AJ nodded, “Yeah, that his younger brother was killed, right?”

“Yeah… well, he just found out not too long ago about his death from his younger sister. He completely lost it and is mad at both Brian and I.”

“What?” AJ muttered, grabbing his fork to probe at his food. “How could he be mad at you and… Brian? It’s not your guys fault that his younger brother died.”

“I know, but…” he sighed once again. “He’s mad at us because we lied to him. We didn’t tell him that his younger brother was dead while this whole time he believed he was still alive. I had told him that no one died…”

“What?” AJ asked him in shock. “Why would you tell him something like that?”

Howie shrugged, “I don’t know… I wasn’t thinking, it just kind of slipped out. We couldn’t tell him that Aaron was dead, he needed all the time he could have to rest up and heal.”

AJ continued to stare at his plate of food, sticking his fork into a mushy broccoli. He twirled it around in the thick meatloaf gravy for a while before bringing it to his lips and eating it off the fork. He cringed as the bitter taste exploded within his mouth. “Did you guys apologize?”

“Over and over…” Howie replied in a phase. “He wouldn’t hear it though… to tell you the truth, I don’t blame him.”

AJ shrugged and stuck his fork in another broccoli tree. “Man, what I wouldn’t give for McDonalds.” They both fell silent and AJ slowly looked up towards Howie, a slow grin creeping up on his face.

Howie looked up at AJ as well and began to shake his head. “Oh no, I am not going to get you McDonalds, you know you can’t eat that.”

“Please!” AJ began to beg. “What they don’t know won’t hurt!”

Howie continued to stare at AJ, begging helplessly. He finally gave in with a sigh. “Fine, whatever… only this one time though! And I’m only doing it cause I have nothing better to do, and I feel sorry for you!”

AJ smiled a cheesy grin. “Thank you…”

Denise walked in through the sliding doors of the hospital, stopping to take everything in. She still couldn’t believe that her son, her five sons she has grown to love were here, in the hospital. The whole situation seemed surreal to her, she was used to seeing them on stage, live and energetic, but now, she would be seeing them bedridden, weak and listless.

She approached the front desk of the office; five bunches of bouquets in hand. The elderly receptionist stopped typing on the computer and had looked up. “Can I help you ma’am?”

Denise smiled, “Yes, can you tell me what room Alexander James McLean would be in?”

The receptionist nodded and began to type on her computer, her wrinkly fingers dancing gracefully over the keyboard. “Ah, a Backstreet Boy. And your relationship with this person would be…”

“His mother.”

“May I see some identification please?”

Denise placed her bouquets down and raised her purse up on the counter. She began to rummage through her bag, looking for her wallet. As soon as she found it, she pulled out her driver’s license and handed it to the older lady.

The receptionist pulled out a clipboard and began to scribble the information of her driver’s license onto a form. She then opened a cabinet in her desk and pulled out a nametag. “He’s in ICU unit number 5, present this tag to the staff of the ICU unit, it gives you clearance to the room. It’s the third floor and just follow the signs that direct you to the ICU unit. Remember, his unit is number five.”

Denise smiled and nodded, grabbing her driver’s license, nametag and her bouquet of flowers. “Thank you.” And with that, she began to make her way towards the elevators.

As soon as she stepped onto the elevator, the doors began to close when someone shouted for her to hold it. Quickly, she darted her hand out, preventing the doors from closing and causing it to reopen again. A young woman had stepped on, a young boy trailing behind, holding her hand.

“Thank you.” The woman muttered.

Denise smiled and pushed the third floor button. “Which floor?”

“Same as you… taking him to see his daddy.”

Denise looked down at the young boy and smiled. When the young boy looked up, Denise’s eyes widened. The young boy looked exactly like her son when he was little. Big eyes with curly eyelashes, chocolate colored eyes and hair, and most of all a smile that could melt anyone’s heart.

“Handsome son you have.” Denise remarked.

The woman looked down at her son and smiled. “Thank you… he takes after his father in so many ways.”

Denise looked up and stared at the closed elevator doors. She began to think of her late husband, of how everybody said that Alex took after Robert in many ways, but at the same time, she thought of how his father was never there for him.

There was a “ding” sound that rung out and the doors slid open. The woman walked out first, dragging her son along. The young boy looked back at Denise and smiled, waving goodbye, the pacifier in his mouth preventing him from saying anything. Denise smiled as well, waving goodbye before she walked out of the elevator herself and began to make her way towards the ICU unit.

Once she reached the ICU area, she stayed outside for a while, staring at nurses and doctors bustling back and forth through the glass doors. She took a deep breath in and pushed the glass door open, slowly walking in.

“May I help you ma’am?” a big, burly security guard had asked her.

Why does everyone have to ask me that? Denise thought to herself. Does it look like I need help?!? “Um, yes I’m here to see my son… Alexander James McLean.” She replied as she handed him the tag the receptionist had given her.

The security guard grabbed the tag and looked at it. “Alright, go ahead.” He said as he handed the tag back to her. “He’s in unit 5, just keep going straight and look for room 5.”

Denise nodded and began to walk straight down the hall of the ICU unit. She glanced by every room she passed, looking at the patients that were occupying the rooms. She began to think back when she first received the call of the accident. She nearly fainted when she was informed that her son and Kevin were in critical condition. She actually fainted when they told her that Aaron didn’t make it. After the accident, she couldn’t bring herself around to seeing them in the hospital. It was only weeks later when she realized that she was being selfish in not wanting to see them in the state that they were in, especially her son. Kristin Richardson had called her to tell her about AJ’s mild case of amnesia that only prolonged her distance from the hospital.

She found herself standing outside the door; half of her wanting to go in, the other half wanting to walk right back out. She grabbed the doorknob and twisted it, slowly pushing it open. She peered in through the crack of the door, seeing Howie standing beside the bed. She pushed the door further open and had walked in, catching both Howie and AJ’s attention.

Howie smiled warmly, “Hi Denise.”

Denise smiled back, “Hello Howard… how are you?”

Howie walked over towards Denise and had grabbed her in a hug. “I’m doing great, both Nick and I were discharged earlier today. Just thought I’d drop by and keep your son company, but now I’ll leave you two alone.”

But Denise shook her head, “Oh no dear, please stay. This is my first time seeing him, well, all of you since the accident and I…” she faltered, not knowing what else to say.

“Mom?”

Both Howie and Denise turned to look at AJ, who looked like a little lost pup. His eyes were slightly big; he had a small grin on his face, making him look young again. He didn’t have any facial hair; he insisted that the hair on his face was a bit grungy, and his short hair was a bit messy and ruffled.

“Hi Alex.” Denise choked out. “How are you doing sweetie?”

AJ’s small grin broke out into a full smile and he held his arms out to her. Denise began to cry as she walked towards the bed, allowing herself to be braced in her son’s arms, holding her tight and never letting her go. Howie simply stood there and stared at the scene before him, the smile never leaving his face. A minute or so later, the hug finally broke and Denise began to wipe away her tears with the back of her hand.

“Gosh Alex, thanks for making me mess up my mascara.”

AJ chuckled, “Anytime mom, anytime…”

“Oh,” Denise suddenly said, remembering about the bouquet of roses she had brought. “I brought flowers for each of you.”

She handed AJ a bouquet of roses and then turned to give Howie his. “Um, mom… don’t you think we’re a bit… manly for flowers?”

Denise looked back at her son and scoffed, “No man is ever to manly for flowers. Now give me that so I can place it in a vase.”

“There’s a vase right on the sink in the bathroom.” AJ replied, pointing to the bathroom.

Denise nodded and walked into the bathroom, grabbing the crystal vase off the sink and filling it with cold water. She ripped off the cellophane that was wrapped around the bouquet and placed the dozen of roses into the vase. “I was looking for yellow roses, but all they had was white.” She said as she walked out of the bathroom, placing the vase on the desk near his bed. She looked down at the food tray that was by the bed and seen a crunched up brown McDonald’s bag.

“Alex.” She said in a scolding tone. “Are you supposed to be eating McDonalds? Who got this for you?”

“Uh…” AJ froze, thinking of an excuse. Howie quickly glanced away, not wanting to get caught. “A secret admirer got it for me. I guess it was okay that I ate it because the nurse delivered it to my room herself.”

“So the nurse got it for you?”

“No, a secret admirer brought it for me… the nurse only delivered it.”

Denise cocked an eyebrow. “I see…” she turned to look at Howie, who was busy avoiding her look. “And you wouldn’t happen to know anything of this, would you Howard?”

Howie quickly shook his head, and Denise could only laugh when she realized that she caught them in their lie. “Well, I’m gonna go pay a visit to Kevin and Brian… where’s Nick?”

Howie looked away, “He left…”

Denise continued to stare at Howie, knowing he was hiding something from her, but she didn’t want to press on. “Oh, okay. Well, when you see him could you give this to him for me.” She asked, handing him a bouquet of roses. “I’ll see you later sweetie.”

Howie leaned forward, accepting the kiss Denise gave him on the cheek. “Bye Denise.”

She turned back towards her son and smiled. She leaned forward and had placed a kiss on his forehead. “I’ll see you later on tonight baby… you get some rest, okay?”

AJ nodded, “Yes mom… bye.”

Denise began to walk out of the room, but stopped and turned around. “Oh, and no more McDonalds Alexander… and I mean it!”

His eyes was closed, but he was alert, only being semiconscious. He could feel a presence in the room, not a spiritual, but an actual person. A familiar scent had caught his senses, sending them into overload. His eyes fluttered open, he found himself staring a beautiful woman he considered his goddess.

“Leighanne?”

Leighanne smiled, tears brimming in her eyes. She walked from the door straight to his bed and embraced him, never wanting to let go. Brian could only close his eyes and inhale the scent that surrounded him. How could he push away her lovely smell, her gentle arms, her sweet lips, her radiant eyes, her golden locks, the love of his life. He made a mistake that time, and he was to make sure he wouldn’t do it again.

“I’m so sorry baby…” Brian apologized. “Please forgive me.”

Leighanne released him and placed a finger upon his lips, preventing him from saying anything more. “I’m not looking for an apology. I just want to hold you… that’s all.”

Brian nodded and grabbed at her again, squeezing her in a tight embrace this time. They remained like that for a while, before Leighanne decide to break away, the awkward position of the hug was straining her back. “I was waiting for you to wake up… and I couldn’t help than to notice this big… hole in the wall. Do you mind if I ask what that was all about?”

Brian sighed, “Nick punched the wall… he was discharged earlier today and he had found out about Aaron’s death only now. He was upset at both Howie and I for not telling him…”

“What?” Leighanne questioned him, a bit shocked. “why didn’t you guys tell him? That was his brother, he had a right to know as soon as possible.”

Brian turned away to look at the hole, he really didn’t want to talk about the earlier events, but at the same time, he didn’t want to push his wife away again. “I know… but, I felt he wasn’t ready for such news… especially since he was recovering and all. The truth is, I was assuming he wasn’t ready, and at the same time, I was too busy saying how unfit it would’ve been to tell him at that moment when in actuality I myself wasn’t ready to tell him. Now, he’s mad at us and went off the god knows where… and it’s all my fault.”

“Oh sweetie.” Leighanne sighed, “This isn’t your fault… I’m sure Nick would’ve been the same way if Harold had died. He would’ve thought about your health and condition first. Knowing Nick, if he had found out while he was still here in the hospital, he would’ve literally beaten himself up over the whole situation, which would’ve only made matters worse.”

“That’s what I’ve been thinking. But I also realized that I had been selfish this whole time… blaming him for not being ready to know when it was me this whole time who wasn’t ready to tell him. I lost him already Leighanne.”

Leighanne grabbed his hand and brought it towards her lips, kissing the top of it gently. Brian closed his eyes as it brought back memories of her doing exactly that when he first awoken, finding her to be the only one that was at his side. “You didn’t lose him Brian. He just needs time to think things through… you know Nick, he can’t stay mad at you forever, he’ll come around, just give him time. Now, what you need to do is stop beating yourself up over this situation and get the rest you need so you can get out of here faster. I heard you went into cardiac arrest.”

Brian tensed up when she said that. “Yeah… the weird thing was, it was me and Nick were talking. He was talking about Aaron, how he had to see him and tell him that everything was going to be okay, and hearing him say that literally gave me a heart attack.”

“You see, your getting yourself worked up over so much honey, you need to take it easy. You keep doing this, you’ll never be able to leave the hospital. By the way, your management has rented out a hotel not far from here for you guys to stay in, for security reasons.”

Brian snapped up to look at her. “They believed us?”

“Believed what?”

“We told Dr. McNorton that this whole situation wasn’t an accident…”

“Ahh yes,” Leighanne interrupted him. “Johnny was explaining that to me. That’s why Howie told them to rent out the nearest hotel for you… discharged people to stay in, which will be heavily guarded by a team of security guards.”

“What about AJ and Kevin? They’re both in ICU, and I’m sure I’ll be discharged before those two.”

“That’s just it… they’re in ICU, which is heavily guarded anyway. But I was informed that in a day or two they will be downgraded to a regular hospital room, they still will be watched by a security team 24/7.”

Brian nodded and grabbed both of her hands in his, causing her to stare straight into his eyes. “I want you to go and stay at my parent’s house… there is no way in hell…”

But Leighanne silenced him. “It’s okay sweetie, that’s all taken care of already. Your family, as well as the rest of the fellas families are being guarded as well. Not stop worrying about everything so much.”

Brian smiled and looked to the side, seeing a vase of roses for the first time. “Who’s that from?”

Leighanne turned back to look at the roses as well. “From Denise… she came by earlier to drop it off, but you were sleeping, so she just left it and told me to tell you that she loves you and will see you later on tonight.”

Brian nodded. “So… how’s Baylee doing?”

“He’s with your mother… has been for a while, driving her up the wall, but of course she doesn’t mind. They should be flying back down here in a day or two to attend Aaron’s funeral.”

Brian’s heart skipped a beat. “When’s Aaron’s funeral?”

“Sunday.” Leighanne replied. “The doctors are hopeful that you’ll be released before then, and as for Kevin and AJ… they’ll allow them to attend if they want to, but they must come back to the hospital after it’s done.”

Brian rolled his head to the side and found himself staring up at the ceiling. “God Leigh… what have I done?”

Leighanne brushed his hair out of his face and began to run her fingernails down the side of his face. “What any best friend would’ve done…”

Two days passed, and Brian was released from the hospital. He met up with Howie at the hotel, finding it awkward to only see two Backstreet Boys occupying two rooms when it was normally five of them, running through the hall and bothering each other. None of them had heard from Nick, but come to find out, he had caught a cab back to his parent’s house the day he was discharged from the hospital.

Brian walked into his vacant hotel room, not really wanting to stay there by himself. Normally, Nick would be pounding on his door, planning out how they could spend their time together, but this time, that wasn’t the case. This time, he was at his parent’s house, helping them plan his younger brother’s funeral, which was tomorrow. His family should be landing anytime now, and Leighanne along with his personal bodyguard had gone to the airport to pick them up. Howie’s family was already here, they were occupying the floor of rooms below them, that’s where all their families would be staying.

Brian didn’t even seem to notice that Howie had slowly opened his hotel door and was peering in, looking to see what he was doing. “You okay Brian?”

Brian turned around, embarrassed that Howie had found him just standing there. “Yeah… just kind of phasing out.”

Howie sighed and pushed the door all the way open. “I know what you mean… but your feeling okay, right? Your not feeling lightheaded or anything…”

Brian chuckled at Howie’s “mother hen” behavior. “No mom…”

Howie laughed, “Real funny. Well, I just came by to ask you if you wanted to go and get something to eat… I know you must be happy that you no longer have to eat the hospital’s generic food… I know AJ would be happy. Could you believe he made me go and get him McDonalds?”

“He made you or you gave in?” Brian asked with a snicker. “At least we know AJ hasn’t lost his taste in McDonalds… cause if he did, I know that would’ve made national headlines!”

“So true.” Howie laughed, shaking his head. “Well, if you want, there’s a restaurant downstairs that we can dine in…”

Brian shrugged, “Sounds good to me.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Howie watched Brian as he simply used his fork to push his vegetables back and forth on his plate in silence. They ordered the buffet line, and Brian hadn’t grabbed much to put on his plate. Just some vegetables, shrimp, a slab of roast turkey and mashed potatoes.

Howie sighed and placed his fork down on his plate. “Okay… what is wrong with you Brian? You’ve really been out of it all day, tell me… what’s going on?”

“Aaron’s funeral is tomorrow…” was all Brian said in reply.

Howie slowly nodded, waiting to see if he was going to say anything else. “Yes… I know that, we all do.”

“Do you honestly think Nick would want us to be there?” Brian had asked him, stabbing his fork in a baby corn and drowning it in the gravy and mashed potatoes. “I mean… do you honestly think he would want to see the people who didn’t even tell him that his brother was dead?”

Howie sighed heavily this time. “It’s not about him Brian… it’s about Aaron. Who cares if we’re the most hated people on his list… we’re going to be there for Aaron and to pay respects to his family… we’ll deal with Nick later. There’s no way Nick can keep us from going to the funeral… he may not want to see us, but like I said, it’s not about him.”

Brian remained silent, continuing to play with the food on his plate.

“We were hoping to catch you two here…” a voice suddenly said.

Both Howie and Brian looked up to see both of their families standing there. “You guys aren’t done eating yet, right?” Paula had asked.

Both Howie and Brian looked at each other, but Brian broke his eyes away. “Well actually…”

Leighanne walked up towards Brian and touched him on his shoulder. “Sweetie, you haven’t eaten a thing on your plate, your not getting sick are you?” she asked him, placing her hand on his forehead.

Brian shook his head, gently grabbed his hand to bring it away from his head. “No, I just wasn’t in the mood to eat… didn’t really have an appetite, that’s all.”

“How could you not have an appetite?” his brother, Harold asked. “I know how the hospital’s food can be… and lets just say that there’s no gourmet chefs working there.”

Brian just stared up the families that was now creating chaos in his head. His mother was busy talking to Howie’s mom while the two dads were talking. Harold was holding Baylee and talking to John and Pollyanna, while Leighanne was checking to see if he was okay, invading what little space he felt he had left. Howie could only stare at him in helplessness.

Brian abruptly pushed away from the table and rose from his seat, causing all of them to stop talking and to look at him. “I’m gonna go now…”

But Leighanne grabbed his arm, stopping him in his tracks. “Why honey? We all just came to join both you and Howie for dinner.”

“Well, I’m done eating, you guys can stay and eat with Howie… he’s not done with his meal yet.”

He began to walk away again, but his mother called him back. “Brian!” Jackie called out. “Where are you going?”

Brian took a deep breath in. “I’m gonna go back to my room… I’m just feeling tired is all.” and with that, he left them all standing there, staring dumbfounded at him.

He brushed past the security guards that were guarding the front entrance of the restaurant and had walked right towards the elevator. As soon as he pushed the button, the doors slid open and he walked in quickly, pushing the seventh floor button, praying to god that the doors would close before his bodyguard came onto the same elevator.

“Brian, wait!” Earl, his bodyguard said, but the doors were already closing, and Brian did nothing to stop them.

He allowed his head to fall back, hitting the wall of the elevator. He needed to get away from everything and everyone, needed to clear his thoughts and rid himself of the mental pain that was ruining him. As soon as the doors opened, he walked off and walked straight towards his room, swiping his card through and pushing his door open. Once he walked into his room, he kicked off his shoes and had shut off all the lights, wanting his room, his world to be completely dark and cold.

He didn’t bother to change his clothes, he simply fell onto the bed and curled up into a ball, enjoying the feeling of the cold air embracing him. He was staring off into the darkness of his room, and slowly, black was drenched on top of black as his eyes drifted close and he fell into a deep world of slumber.

The next day was long and treacherous. The world seemed to be going at such a fast pace, but time seemed to take longer than usual. He took his time putting on a tuxedo the group’s personal fashion designer had brought. Once he buttoned up his top vest, he sat down on his bed and placed on his black shoes, tying the laces in knots. He looked up and seen a basketball on the ground, which wasn’t there before. He grabbed the basketball and brought it up towards him, tears beginning to fill his eyes.

“Hey Brian, are yo…” Howie stopped mid-sentence and just stared at Brian, who was staring at the basketball in hands. He sighed and made his way towards him, sitting down on the bed beside him.

He took in a deep breath and sighed. “It’s time Rok.”

Brian didn’t break his stare on the basketball, he just simply sat there and had let his tears fall freely, not caring that Howie was there to see him cry. “It seems like just yesterday when I used to carry Aaron on my shoulders… I remember the day both Nick and I tried to teach him the fundamentals of basketball… and either Nick or myself would lift him high up on our shoulders so he could make a slam dunk. Now…” he paused as he began to choke on his sobs. “we’re going to his funeral, celebrating the end of his life and the end of the many things we were once able to do with him.”

Howie was at a lost for words. Nothing he could say anymore could snap Brian out of the phase he was in. “We need to go now… the limos are out there waiting for us.”

Howie rose from the bed and made his way out of the room. Brian just stared at the open door, watching Howie leave. He got up off the bed as well and placed the basketball down on the bed before he began to walk out of the room. Couple seconds later, he turned around and walked back into his room, grabbing the basketball off his bed, and then he walked out of his room, closing the door behind him.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The funeral was awkward. The chapel was packed, mostly with family, and there was not a dry-eyed person there. The Backstreet Boys were sat in the front pews, in the third row. Near Aaron’s casket sat the immediately family, Bob Carter, Jane Carter, Angel, Leslie and BJ Carter, and last but certainly not least, Nick Carter.

Bob’s eyes were red and puffy, but he remained solemn and straightforward. Jane just sat there, staring at her son’s casket, holding a balled up tissue to her mouth as her sobs continued to wrack her body. Angel and Leslie were crying hysterically while BJ held them both in her arms, tears falling freely from her eyes. Nick just stared, not turning to look at anybody, not even blinking. His eyes were puffy and glossy, and his face took on a bright cherry red color. He looked as if he didn’t get sleep at all, dark circles appearing below his eyes, his cheeks swollen and stained with burning, salty tears.

Brian turned and looked to the side of them, down the line of the three Backstreet Boys. Both Kevin and Howie had tears in their eyes, and even though AJ was confused as to who Aaron was, he even had glassy eyes. Brian turned to look at the closed casket again. He didn’t know if he was crying or not, his face was so numb, he couldn’t feel the tracks of his hot tears running down his face.

He stared at the casket long and hard… he knew why they decided to have a closed casket. When they found Aaron at the crash site, his body was severed in half from the crash. Not many people knew that, and he was glad that it was kept that way. Many people were rude enough to ask Jane why she had decided to have the casket closed, and she simply told them that “he didn’t look the same.”

Everything was drowned out for a moment, from what the priest way saying, to the mourning people behind him. He looked back over towards the family and gasped at what he saw. There was Aaron, sitting next to Nick. Aaron was staring at his mourning family, shaking his head, and then he had turned to look at Brian. “He’s already lost me Brian… don’t let him lose you too.” he said before he disappeared.

Everything literally fell silent after that, the priest had stopped talking and the mourners tried their best to conceal their sobs. Nick then rose from his seat and had walked to the altar, taking the place the priest once was. He adjusted the microphone and had placed a stack of papers before him. Aaron’s eulogy.

“When I was younger, I always seemed to enjoy the finer things in life. Before the year of 1987, it was only BillIe Jean, Leslie and I, living with our parents, Robert and Jane Carter. Being the eldest boy wasn’t easy. I wanted everything my way, I wanted the attention to be on me at all times… that was, before BJ and Leslie had came into this world, but once they was born, I always felt as if all the attention was diverted to them because they were the girls of the family. Seven years later, my parents had broke down the news that my mother was pregnant by asking me, “how would you feel if you had two more siblings?” Me, still being young and spoiled, I exclaimed, “What?!? I don’t want another brother or sister… you already have me and BJ and Leslie, I want a dog!” Of course, they ignored that demand and had themselves twins, another girl and a boy, who would forever change my life. Angel and Aaron Carter was born on December 7th, 1987. After my brother was born, I dropped the fact that I wanted a dog… whoever knew I would like the role of being the biggest brother in the family? Here I was, complaining of not being the only child in the family, but gaining three younger sisters, especially a younger brother had changed my perspective on things. Of course there was nothing I could teach my sisters. In the younger days, I was infatuated with comic books, bugs and water… for girls, this world was unheard of. They had better things to do, like makeup and talk about boys. Just when I felt like I was losing my title of being the “oldest brother”, Aaron stepped in and wanted to learn… from me. I was able to teach him everything, from how to catch and dissect bugs, to how to depict limited edition comic books.”

There were muffled chuckles that erupted throughout the chapel, but everything remained silent. Nick continued, “By the year of 1992, I was 12 years old and little Aaron was five. We were living in Tampa then, and I remember coming across some flyers that were posted up almost everywhere. A wealthy man by the name of Lou Pearlman was looking for young boys to audition for a boy band he wanted to put together. I had auditioned and was selected along with two other boys to be apart of the band. At first, it was only me, Howard Dorough, and Alexander James McLean.”

Brian had looked to the side and AJ and had seen him staring at Nick in confusion, he knew AJ was wondering why Nick had said his name. “But not long after, two Kentucky cousins by the name of Brian Littrell and Kevin Richardson joined the group, thus creating the Florida-based Backstreet Boys. My little brother Aaron was always there, watching us every practice, every show, even coming along with us when we first started touring. When we would have sound checks, I remember he would run up to the stage and stand in the middle, belting out any song he could think of. The fellas and I could only stand there and laugh at his antics. As the years passed, the Backstreet Boys was sweeping the land, and Aaron was slowly but surely coming out of his shell. During one of our concerts, we had Aaron to be an opening act for us. After the whole show, I remember most of our fans rushing to backstage, not to ask for our autographs, but to ask us who the blonde bombshell was that stole the show. The fellas and I looked at each other, dumbfounded, wondering how a little kid could possibly steal the show. Sure enough, when Aaron walked out of his dressing room, the crowd of girls went crazy for him. As soon as I turned to look at my brother that night, that’s when I realized that he was truly to be a man of his own… no one would no longer refer to him as “Nick’s little brother”… they would now know him to be Aaron Carter.”

Brian’s mind blanked out when memories began to flash before his eyes. All that Nick had reminisced on about Aaron was coming back to him. He could still hear Nick’s voice, reading the eulogy, but with every detail he gave of his memory, he could visually see it. Seeing Aaron once more, happy and carefree was what made his heart ache. Everything fell silent all of a sudden, and when Brian had snapped back into the real world, he realized that Nick was done with reading the eulogy and was now seated in the same seat he was in, near Aaron’s casket.

At the end of the funeral, many of the mourners left the chapel and went to the dining area to help themselves to refreshments. Meanwhile, Jane and Bob Carter walked outside to talk to the fans and the press that were there, thanking them for all the support through their trialing times. The four Backstreet Boys remained in the pew, staring at Nick, who held his head in his hands. Finally Brian rose from his seat and stood in the isle, waiting for Howie, Kevin and AJ to do the same. Nick rose his head a bit and glanced at them, watching them as they just stood there for a while in the isle.

Just as Brian took his first step forward, Nick rose from his seat as well and walked over to the closed casket, staring down upon it. Brian froze in his tracks and just stared at Nick’s trembling form, wanting to go up to comfort him, but couldn’t because he knew that Nick was no longer his friend. Nick slowly placed his hands on the closed casket and began to cry hysterically, almost collapsing forward.

When Brian saw this, he lunged forward, pulling Nick back gently into his warm arms. Nick allowed himself to fall backwards into the welcoming arms, but quickly pushed away when he realized that it was Brian who was trying to comfort him. “Don’t f***ing touch me!” he snapped, not even turning around to look at him.

Brian sighed, “C’mon Nick… I’m just trying to comfort you man. For god sakes, you almost fell onto your brother’s casket…”

“Shutup!” Nick screamed, whirling around to glare at all four of them. “Just shut up and leave me the f*** alone. I told you that I was tired of you guys thinking you know what’s wrong with me and thinking you know what’s best for me. You guys are even lucky I had let you attend my brother’s funeral…”

“You couldn’t keep us away Nick…” Kevin said, not liking the way Nick was acting.

“You think I couldn’t keep you away? Funny… you guys were able to keep the news that my brother was dead away from me… still think I can’t do anything? You see, that’s your guys problem… you assume so f***ing much! You know what… I don’t even know what I’m doing standing here, wasting my time on you all…”

He turned to walk away, but Brian caught him by the arm. “Nick, wait…”

Nick quickly whirled around and shoved Brian backwards, which sent him hurling into Howie. “Have you lost your damn mind?” Kevin exclaimed.

“No!” Nick snapped, walking up to Kevin, his face inches away from his. “I’ve lost more than that…” and with that, he left the chapel.

The next day was just as long and grueling, today being Aaron’s burial date. Again, everyone was there, Nick, his family, their extended family and friends, and his bandmates. The press and fans were locked outside of the graveyard due to privacy, they could only stand outside of the gates and watch in silence as they would lower Aaron’s casket six feet beneath the earth. Brian stared at the casket in a trance, Nick’s words echoing in his ears, replaying through his mind.

“Have you lost your damn mind?”

“No… I’ve lost more than that.”

He looked up towards the Carter family and seen Jane crying and reaching out to her sounds lowering casket, Bob was holding her back. Angel was crying as well, Leslie trying to hold her trembling form. BJ had rose from her seat and stormed away from the site, tears falling freely from her eyes and anger ripping her apart from the inside out. Nick only glared at the casket as it was being lowered. This was the last time he would be seeing his brother… on second thought, the last time he ever saw his brother was before the accident.

The priest made the sign of the cross as the casket finally came to rest in the hole, and the graveyard workers began to shovel the dirt back into the hole. Jane snapped up from her seat and was about to jump into the hole after her son, but Bob pulled her back and began to carry her away from the site. Leslie and Angel rose from their seats and followed their parents out. Nick broke his stare from the sight of his brother being buried and looked up to glare at Brian. He stared at him long and hard, his eyes low and red, his mouth twisted in a tight line. Brian tried his best to avoid his glare, but he could feel Nick’s eyes burning into the core of his soul. Finally Nick snapped up from where he sat his seat flying backwards as he did so. Brian could only watch Nick as he left, following his hysteric family to the limo.

“Brian.” Howie whispered, touching his shoulder.

Brian looked up at him. “Yeah?”

“C’mon, lets go...”

But Brian shook his head. “Just give me a few minutes out here… I’ll meet you guys at the limo.”

Howie was going to protest, but refused to when he seen the hurt and guilt in Brian’s eyes. He sighed and patted his on the shoulder, “Stop doing this to yourself Bri… no matter what Nick says, this isn’t your fault…”

Brian didn’t say anything in reply. Howie turned away and started to walk back to the limos, knowing he wasn’t going to get through to him, no matter what he did. A minute or so later, everyone left the burial site and the workers were through with filling the hole with dirt. Brian knelt down by the mound of fresh dirt and placed his hand on it, silently saying a prayer. All of a sudden, he felt a drop of water land on his head, and when he looked up to the sky; rain began to fall, pelting his body and face. He looked back down at the grave and reached behind him to grab the basketball he had brought with him.

“I forgot to give this to you yesterday…” he said, placing the basketball on the mound of dirt. “Save a spot on the court for me, will ya…” his voice cracked, and he just sat there, letting it all out. His tears mixed with the drops of rain that was running down his face. He placed his two hands on the dirt and began to claw at it. “I should’ve told him Aaron… I should’ve listened to you… this is all my fault.”

“Brian!” a voice shouted. “Brian!”

Brian slowly looked up and saw Aaron standing over his grave, smiling down at him. All of a sudden, he felt a pair of arms wrap around his body and tried to haul him in the air. Brian fought back against the grasp and landed back down on the now soggy dirt, caking his tuxedo with the dark red mush.

“Brian, c’mon now… get out of the rain.”

Brian turned back to the voice and seen Howie standing there with their chauffer under an umbrella. “I told you to give me a few minutes out here alone…”

“It’s been more than a few minutes Bri… your drenched man, do you want to catch something and go back into the hospital?”

Brian didn’t answer him. He raised his hand towards Howie and had allowed himself to be pulled up from off the muddy ground. Howie wrapped his arms around Brian’s shivering shoulders and drew him closer to him, trying to get him as warm as possible. Once they got into the limo, Brian began to cry again, covering his face. Howie sighed and decided not to say anything; he just sat there and had let him get out everything he could.

“It’s all my fault D… I should’ve told Nick!”

“I already told you Rok, it’s not your fault. You can’t help it if you were looking out for Nick… you were simply doing what any best friend would’ve done.”

“No!” Brian all of a sudden snapped, taking Howie by surprise. “A best friend wouldn’t keep anything from them… a best friend would tell them anything… a best friend would tell someone if their brother died. I’m no best friend Howie… I kept it from him, because I wasn’t ready to tell him… while this whole time I was blaming all of this on him, saying that he wasn’t ready.”

Howie remained silent, truly being at a lost of words. Brian turned away to look out the window, wiping his tears away angrily. The rest of the ride remained silent, both Howie and Brian looking everywhere and anywhere but at each other. Once they arrive at the hotel, Brian quickly jumped out of the limo and made his way into the hotel, not even bothering to wait for Howie.

He punched the elevator button and waited impatiently for the doors to open. Howie slowly came up to him, making sure he stood at a distance. Once the doors slid open, both Howie and Brian stepped on, still not saying a word to each other. Howie finally broke the silence. “Why are you pushing me away?”

“I’m not pushing anyone away…” Brian replied in a monotone voice.

“Obviously you are, because you won’t say anything to me… you won’t even look at me.”

“You want me to look at you?” Brian asked, turning so he could stare Howie dead in the eyes. “There… I’m looking at you. And you want me to say something to you, well look, I’m saying something to you right now… there, you happy?”

“No, I’m not happy… what would make me happy is if you listen to me for once when I tell you that this is not your fault. You don’t even see what your doing to yourself Brian… this whole time, you were worried how Nick would react if you had told him that Aaron was dead, but now look at you… your not even worried about yourself and how your reacting when you should be.”

“This isn’t about me… I don’t care about me Howie, what I care about is Nick… my best frie…” he stopped in the middle of his sentence. “I just don’t care about me.”

Brian was cut short when he found himself pinned to the elevator wall, Howie’s hands grasping the collar of his shirt. He was taken aback when Howie slammed him into the wall, causing him to fall speechless. “Stop it!’ Howie shouted so loud, he could’ve sworn the elevator shook from the power of his voice. “I’m tired of seeing you do this to yourself… I’m tired of you blaming yourself for something you shouldn’t feel guilty for. I’m tired of hearing how you don’t care about yourself and everything. Just… stop it! Listen to me and listen to me good… this is not your fault. I don’t know what I can do to get it through your head.”

Brian glared at him all of a sudden. “Why don’t you hit me?” he asked him. “I know you want to hit me… I can see it in your eyes. Hell, it’s not like I wasn’t beaten up before… you seen what Nick did to me, why don’t you just join the club and do what your aching to really do Howard…” Howie cringed when Brian said his full name, venom dripping from his voice. “You’re only wasting your breath and time… if talking is obviously not getting through to me, why don’t you hit me as hard as you can… maybe, just maybe that’ll knock some sense into me. Hell, if you hit me hard enough, it might even give me brain damage and I won’t have to put up with this pain anymore… and you’ll no longer have to put up with my s***.”

Howie only stared at Brian in shock. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, but most of all; he couldn’t believe the words he was hearing was coming from Brian’s mouth. “No… I’m not going to hit you Brian. Maybe I’ll just let you go… let you think what you want to think, do what you want to do… just don’t come crying to me when you hit rock bottom.”

The doors slid open, and Howie quickly made his way out of the elevator. Brian just stood there, staring helplessly at Howie. He began to slide down the wall of the elevator, matching the tears that slid down his face. First he lost Nick, now Howie… who was next?

Days passed, and no one heard anything from Nick since the funeral. Both Brian and Howie had avoided seeing each other since their little dispute in the elevator. Brian had just locked himself up in his hotel room, sleeping the hours away, but today he decided to pay a visit to the hospital. Both AJ and Kevin were already downgraded to a regular hospital room and were soon to be released in a day or so.

Brian had stopped by at Kevin’s room first, but Stan, his personal security guard had told him that he was sleeping, so he made his way over to AJ’s room instead. As he neared the room, he realized that the big, burly African-American man he saw standing in front of the door was Marcus, AJ’s personal security guard.

“How’s it going Rok?” Marcus asked him with a smile.

Brian shrugged, “Things could be better… how’s Jay doing?”

Marcus turned to look at the closed door, “He’s doing better than expected. His memory is coming to him slowly but surely, but it’s coming back to him nonetheless. He remembers all of your names, the only problem he’s having is placing the names with a face. He’s up though, so there should be no reason as to why you can’t see him.”

Brian nodded and grabbed the doorknob, twisting it and pushing the door open. “Thanks Marc.”

As soon as he walked into the room and had closed the door behind him, AJ’s head rose and he just stared at him. “Nick… right?”

Brian smiled and shook his head, “Nope… Brian.”

“Sorry,” he apologized. “I always get you and Nick mixed up.”

Brian chuckled and grabbed a chair from the corner of the room, situating it beside his bed. “It could be the blonde hair and the blue eyes… how ya holding up buddy?”

AJ shrugged, “Fine I guess… Dr. Seid said that Dr. McNorton might release me tomorrow… I’m hoping to be released tomorrow, because I have to stay another day in this damn hospital with their nasty ass food…”

“I know what you mean.” Brian laughed. “But, not to worry… as soon as you get outta here, I’ll treat you to McDonald’s… just like the good ole days.”

AJ fell silent for a while, actually thinking over what Brian said. The good ole days. “How much am I missing Brian?”

Brian looked up at him when he asked that question. “What do you mean?”

“You know…” AJ faltered for a while, thinking of what he meant. “the things Howie tells me… it seems as if I missing out on a lot… and I hate it.”

Brian was taken aback when he seen silent tears trickle from out the corner of AJ’s eyes. “I don’t like the fact that I can’t remember the things I should know… it hurts to see you guys, because I always think of how I should know you, and no matter how hard I try to think, I just can’t remember.”

“You need to give it time AJ… it’ll all come back to you in time.”

AJ closed his eyes and began to clench his fists around a handful of his sheets. “That’s just it… I don’t want to give it time.”

Brian sighed, not knowing what he could say to reassure him that everything would be okay. “Look, as soon as you’re released tomorrow, I’ll come and get you and we’ll work on your memory.”

AJ’s eyes lightened up a little. “Seriously? But… how do you know I’ll be released tomorrow? The doctors said they might release me…”

Brian smiled and rose from his chair. “Don’t worry… they’ll release you, and I’ll make sure of that.”

Brian patted him on his shoulder and began to walk out of the room.

“Hey B-Rok!” AJ called out.

Brian stopped and turned around. “Yeah?”

AJ looked down for a while, but then looked back up and smiled. “Thanks… for everything.”

“Anytime buddy… and you see, your already starting to remember.” And with that, he walked out of the room.

AJ continued to stare at the closed door, wondering what he meant by that. It wasn’t till later that it hit him that he had called Brian “B-Rok”… a nickname they all called Brian… and he had remembered that.

As soon as Brian stepped into his hotel room, he seen Leighanne sitting on a chair near the balcony, staring out at the view through the sliding doors. Once Brian closed the door, Leighanne looked up and smiled.

“How did you get in here?” Brian asked her.

Leighanne rose from her seat and began to walk towards him. “Johnny gave me the spare key…” she stopped in front of him and looked off to the side, staring at the bed for a while. She then decided to sit on the bed and had patted her hand on the bed, wanting him to sit down next to her.

Hesitantly, he sat down beside her, making sure there was a small space between them. “We need to talk.” she began.

Brian’s stomach churned. Whenever women said those four words, “we need to talk”, it meant something bad was about to happen. “What do you mean we need to talk? About what?”

Leighanne shrugged. “I don’t know… why don’t you tell me. I only said we need to talk because there’s something on your mind… I can see it in your eyes, hear it in your voice, see it in your actions. Something’s bothering you, and your just keeping it in. I’m not here to force it out of you… I’m here because I’m your wife.”

Brian tried to force back the tears that were threatening to fall from his eyes. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

Leighanne grabbed his face in her hands and had forced him to look at her. “Look me in the eyes and tell me there’s nothing to talk about.”

Without even realizing it, Brian had let his tears go, and it was now flowing freely down his cheeks. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

Leighanne began to wipe away the trickling tears with the pad of her thumb, gently caressing his stained cheeks. “Funny… your tears are telling me otherwise. Brian, you don’t have to push me away… like I said, I’m your wife. Whatever your in, we’re in it together. I thought we made that clear to each other when we got married. Let it go baby…”

Brian literally broke down in her arms, grasping at her body as his sobs began to wrack his body. “What’s wrong with me Leigh… I’m losing everybody and everything right before me. First it was Nick, now it’s Howie… who’s next?”

Leighanne began to tear herself as she tried to hold her weeping husband in her arms. “There’s nothing wrong with you Brian… this accident is affecting everyone in different ways, it’s stressing you out more than anybody. You need to give Nick his time and space, he’ll come to forgive and forget… and Howie… sweetie, you know Howie. He’s the peacemaker… he can’t stay mad at someone forever. He’s trying to balance everything out right now, and he’s really feeling stressed because… I mean, look at it this way, Nick’s not talking to anyone, Kevin and AJ is still in the hospital, and your busy fighting your inner demons… who does it leave to take charge and make sure everything and everybody is okay? Howie. Wouldn’t you be stressed as well if everything came crashing down on you at once, and your trying to heal yourself at the same time?”

Brian thought over what she was saying, realizing that she was right. Here he was, being selfish again, thinking that everyone was turning their backs on him, when in actuality, he was turning his back on everyone else. “I need help… I can’t stand the person I’m turning out to be…”

Leighanne grabbed his face once again and rose it up to her. “Then stop trying to fight this by yourself. I’m here for you baby… here to help you. You need to remember that you don’t have to face each and every day by yourself… your not standing in this world alone. Just open your eyes baby and you’ll see me…”

Brian continued to cry and just clutched on tighter to his wife. He honestly didn’t know where he would be if it wasn’t for Leighanne keeping him sane. Leighanne grabbed him and had pulled him back onto the bed, both of them falling back lightly. Brian kept his hold on Leighanne as she began to kiss his tears away. She began to hum softly, and then sing into his ear, causing him to shiver as he heard her melodic voice and felt her breath tickling the shell of his ear.

“I’ll be the one, who will make all your sorrows undone… I’ll be the light, when you feel like there’s nowhere to run… I’ll be the one, to hold you, and make sure that you’ll be alright, cause my fear is gone, and I want to, take you from darkness to light…” she whispered.

Brian could only smile as her words hit his heart hard. He tightened his grasp on her body and nuzzled himself in the crook of her neck, drifting into a deep sleep.

The next day came quickly, and Brian had a cab drive to the hospital to pick up both Kevin and AJ. He wasn’t sure if Howie knew that they were both being released today, and he didn’t really care, he wasn’t ready to face him today, guilt was still pestering him. He walked in through the sliding doors and boarded the elevators, riding up to the fifth floor. As soon as he stepped off the elevator, he didn’t see Marcus guarding AJ’s door for some reason. Fear quickly settled deep within his stomach, he felt as if something was terribly wrong. He began to jog towards the room and quickly busted through the door, causing both AJ and Howie to look up at him, a startled _expression on his face.

Brian simply stood there sheepishly, wondering what Howie was doing there. Howie stared at him for a while, but then glanced away.

“Hey Rok.” AJ said with a smile. “I told Howie yesterday that I was going to be released today. Are we ready to go?”

Brian simply stared at them, more at AJ and avoiding looking over at Howie at any cost. “You can go back to the hotel with Howie… I’ll go get Kevin.” And with that, he walked out of the room.

“Brian, wait.” AJ called out, but Brian had closed the door already and just continued to walk to Kevin’s room, embarrassed by the way he rushed into the room.

As soon as he got to the room, he opened the door and seen a nurse helping Kevin off the bed and into a wheelchair. “Ready to go Kevin?” Brian asked.

Kevin looked up to Brian and frowned when he seen something in Brian’s eyes, something he had never seen before. “Um, yeah… I guess… I didn’t know you were coming down to get me too.”

Brian’s _expression turned puzzled. “What do you mean?”

“Well, Howie had come to pick both AJ and I up… I didn’t know you came with him, I mean… he didn’t say that you came along with him.”

Brian sighed heavily. “Great! I already got a freaking cab downstairs waiting because I was supposed to pick up you and AJ, but whatever… you can just go with Howie, I’ll see you back at the hotel.”

“Now wait just a minute Brian.”

Brian turned and reached for the door, but stopped when his cousin called out for him. “Since Howie is with AJ, he can take him back to the hotel… I’ll just go with you, it’s no big deal.”

Brian remained silent for a while, thinking over what his cousin proposed. “Fine whatever just come on and let’s go.”

The nurse began to wheel Kevin out of the room, but Brian had stopped her and took over instead, wheeling Kevin out of the room and over to the elevators. “What’s the matter with you Bri?” Kevin asked.

“It’s a long story.” Brian quickly replied as he continuously punched the elevator button, waiting impatiently for any of the elevator doors to slide open. As soon as the first elevator opened its doors, Brian quickly wheeled Kevin in and pushed the “L” button.

“Well, I want you to tell me this long story on the ride back to the hotel.” Kevin said in a monotone voice.
Brian sighed, knowing his cousin wouldn’t stop pestering him until he told him what the problem was. “It’s Howie.”

“What, you guys having a race on who can get back to the hotel the fastest?”

“No.” Brian accidentally shouted. He didn’t mean to sound so harsh, but he didn’t like the way Kevin was taking this situation so lightly. “Both Howie and I had gotten into it… the day of Aaron’s burial, and since then, we hadn’t said anything to each other. The reason I’m rushing out of this damn place is because I’m not ready to face him. I’m the reason why we fought in the first place, and I just feel guilty.”

Kevin fell silent for a while. “Well, that wasn’t a long story.”

Brian simply chuckled; glad his cousin could lighten up the situation just a bit for him. “I know… I just said that because I didn’t want to tell you. I figured if I told you it was a long story, you wouldn’t want to hear it… but I should’ve known better.”

The doors slid open and Brian wheeled him out towards the cab, which was parked right in front. He helped his cousin out of the wheelchair and had helped him into the back of the cab. He then pushed the wheelchair off to the side and got into the back of the cab himself. “Are you gonna apologize to him?” Kevin asked, staring out the window as they drove past the many trees.

Brian stared at him for a while, but then diverted his attention straightforward. “I will… I need to do a lot of things, and I’m gonna get it done.”

Once Brian had situated Kevin in his hotel room, he walked back to his room and opened the door, kicking it close behind him. He walked over to his bed and just collapsed backwards on it, taking in a deep breath in and releasing it heavily. There was a slight knock on the door, and everything fell silent once again.

“Come in.” Brian called out, hoping whoever it was had heard them and wouldn’t make him get out of his bed to
answer it.

The door squeaked as it opened, revealing AJ who was peering in. Brian raised his head to see who it was, and when he saw that it was AJ, he allowed his head to fall back on the pillow. “You can come in.”

AJ pushed the door open further and walked in, walking over to the bed. “Hey Brian… I just wanted to come over here and apologize for what happened earlier today. I really didn’t know Howie was going to come down and pick me and…” he paused as he tried to think over who the other person was that he was supposed to pick up. “Kevin up. I told him yesterday that we were going to be released, and he just showed up today… he didn’t tell me he was going to be the one who was going to pick us up, and I thought you knew about it, so I didn’t think it was going to be a big deal.”

“There’s no need to apologize AJ… and you’re right, it was no big deal. I myself didn’t know that Howie was going to pick you guys up, he didn’t say anything to me either.”

AJ fell silent for a while, wanting to ask him a question, but not wanting to upset him. “If you don’t mind me asking… how come you reacted the way you did when you seen that Howie was helping me out?”

Brian rose off the bed and just sat on the edge, clasping his hands together. “I honestly don’t know…” he fell silent for a while, licking his lips. “Both Howie and I had gotten into a little argument days ago and since then… we hadn’t said anything to each other. That’s why I was a little… surprised to see Howie there, picking you up.”

“So you’re not mad at me?”

Brian looked up at AJ and smiled. “Why would I be? I honestly don’t have a reason to be upset at anyone, not even Howie.”

“So… would right now be an okay time to ask you if you’re still going to live up to your promise?”

Brian simply chuckled. “AJ… anytime would be a great time. I’m ready when you are… and what better place to reminisce than your favorite fast food joint in America?”

A slow grin crept on AJ’s face, the infamous grin that always made girls squeal in chaos. “I’ll go get ready.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Brian grabbed the tray of food off the counter and began to walk over to the table that both he and AJ were seated at. Once he placed it down, he passed AJ his meal and took his own meal off the tray.

“You wouldn’t believe how much I was craving this.” AJ said as he took a bite of his sandwich, relishing the flavor. “Sure, Howie dropped by and snuck me in McDonalds, but nothing beats dining in and eating their food.”

Brian laughed as he took one of his French fries and bathed it in the tartar sauce which was on the side of his filet-o-fish sandwich. “Well, you eat and enjoy buddy…”

They sat there in silence for a while, finishing off their meal. As soon as AJ was finished with his sandwich, he grabbed a napkin from off the tray and began to wipe off any crumbs that may have been on his mouth. “Well, where do we start?”

Brian took a swig of his soda before he answered him. “Where do you want to start?”

AJ shrugged as he began to pick at his remaining French fries. “I don’t really know… that’s why I asked you. You know more than I do, so you start it off.”

Brian placed his drink off to the side and sighed. “Well… in the year of 1992, we all got together and a man by the name of Lou Pearlman created us, a boy band. Our band name was Backstreet Boys, taking the name from a local flea market in Florida. We began recording demos, giving it to various companies, and we caught the attention of one record label while we were doing a live performance. We signed with Jive Records and started to record professional songs. In the year of 1993, we released our very first single, Quit Playing Games With My Heart.”

“How does that song go?”

Brian cocked an eyebrow, not believing that he had actually asked the question. “Wait… you want me to sing it?”

AJ shrugged, “Well, sure… if it helps to bring my memory back.”

Brian sighed heavily, leaning in closer to AJ so his singing wouldn’t catch anyone’s attention. “Well… I’m not really sure if I sound so good, I mean, I haven’t sung… we haven’t sung anything since the accident.”

“And I guess we’ll never know how you sound until you sing…”

Brian chuckled, he had a point there. “Well okay… here it goes… Even in my heart, I see… your not being true to me… deep within my soul, I feel… nothing’s like it used to be… sometimes I wish I could, turn back time… impossible as it may seem… but I wish I could, so bad… baby… quit playing games with my heart.”

He fell silent, waiting for AJ’s reaction. “Is that all?” AJ asked.

“Well,” Brian slurred, “I was waiting to see if you would have picked up on anything.”

AJ shook his head. “Nope, keep going.”

“Quit playing games with my heart… with my heart… with my heart… with my heart… I should’ve known from the start… from my heart… from my heart… from my heart. And in my life, the way… to keep you coming back to me… everything I do, is for you… so what is it that you can’t see… sometimes I wish I could, turn back time… impossible as it may seem… but I wish I could… so bad… baby… you better, quit playing games with my heart… with my heart… with my heart… with my, I should’ve known from the start… from my heart… from my heart… quit playing games…”

AJ smiled, “You have a nice voice Brian.”

Brian laughed. “AJ, you weren’t supposed to be paying attention to my voice, you were supposed to be paying attention to the words. Now, I’m gonna say the next words, and I want you to sing it… however you think it should be sung. In the actual song, these next words is the part where you come in to sing, so just sing what I tell you, okay?”

AJ nodded. “Sure… but wait, what if I don’t sound as I’m supposed to?”

“Well, we’ll never know how you sound until you sing!” Brian mocked. “Now, sing these words… baby, baby… the love that we had was so strong… don’t keep me hanging here forever.”

AJ remained silent, thinking over the words Brian had told him and thinking of how he could, or would sing it to match the tune of the song. “Baby, baby… the love that we had was so strong… don’t keep me hanging here forever…”

Brian smiled. “Good… you see, you matched the tune of the song, and I didn’t even have to sing your part to remind you of how it should sound. Now, sing this… oh baby, baby… this is not right, lets stop this tonight.”

“Oh baby, baby… this is not right, lets stop this tonight…” AJ sung, matching the tune perfectly.

Brian could only continue to smile as he thought helping AJ getting his memory back wouldn’t be as hard as he thought. “Now, I’m gonna take it back to the chorus and I want you to jump in on your part, okay?”

AJ nodded as Brian began to sing. “I should’ve known from the start… from my heart… from my heart…quit playing games.”

AJ jumped in perfectly and on time. “Baby, baby… the love that we had was so strong… don’t keep me hanging here forever… oh baby, baby… this is not right, lets stop this tonight…”

Brian nodded. “Perfect. Now, sing the chorus with me and I’m gonna harmonize with it. You keep your voice straight, even if you hear me change my voice up a notch, okay?”

AJ nodded and began to sing the chorus with Brian. “Quit playing games with my heart… with my heart… with my heart… with my, I should’ve known from the start… from my heart… from my heart… from my heart…”

Brian gave AJ a high five, congratulating him on how he was getting his memory to work again. “How ‘bout we go back to the hotel and show off what you remember, what do you say?”

AJ smiled. “I say that sounds like a plan!”

Both Brian and AJ rushed to Kevin’s room and began to knock rapidly on his door. “Alright, hold on, hold on… hold your freaking horses!” Kevin shouted as he got up off his bed and made his way to the door, opening it and staring at Brian and AJ, who were grinning back at him. “Am I missing something here? Why are you two grinning like maniacs?”

“AJ wants to show you something… ready AJ?”

AJ nodded and Brian began to count down. They began to sing the song for Kevin, harmonizing the chorus and all, and when it came to the bridge, AJ belted out his part, his raspy, strong voice clearly shining through. A slow grin crept up on Kevin’s face, proud of the way AJ had remembered the song. “And may I ask what brought this on?”

“Well,” Brian began. “We were at McDonalds and he wanted me to sing the song for him. I did just that, but when it came to his part where he did the bridge, I only said the words to him and had him sing it back to me. I didn’t have to sing it to him or anything Kevin… he remembered how the part was supposed to go, and he matched it perfectly to the tune of the song, without my help.”

AJ nodded, agreeing with what Brian was saying. “I have to go get Howie and show him!”

“There’s no need to, because I was right here the whole time… and I heard you.”

The three of them turned around and seen Howie standing there, staring at them. “Take it from the top Brian…” Howie said with a smile, joining the small circle that was created in front of Kevin’s door.

Brian continued to stare at Howie and slowly smiled. “Even in my heart, I see… your not being true to me… deep within my soul, I feel… nothing’s like it used to be… sometimes I wish I could, turn back time… impossible as it may seem… but I wish I could, so bad… baby…”

They all joined in for the chorus and began to harmonize with one another, the way the used to back in their younger days. “Quit playing games with my heart, quit playing games with my heart… with my heart, before you tear us apart… with my heart, quit playing games with my heart… with my heart… I should’ve known from the start, you know you gotta stop… from my heart, quit tearing us apart… from my heart, quit playing games with my heart… from my heart.”

They all fell silent, as if awaiting for Nick to jump in, and realization had hit Brian hard when realized that time would not come, Nick wasn’t here with them to jump in. “I’m sorry you guys.” Brian quickly apologized and left them, walking back briskly to his room.

“Brian.” AJ called out, but Brian ignored him, continuing to walk away until he reached his room. He opened his door and walked in, closing it quietly behind him, not even bothering to lock it. The three of them remained rooted to where they stood, in front of Kevin’s room. AJ backed away, leaning back on the wall and Kevin began to walk out of his room to go talk to Brian, but Howie had stopped him.

“No.” Howie said, placing his hand on Kevin’s chest. “I’ll talk to him.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Brian quickly looked up when he heard his door open, and he seen Howie slowly walking in. “Hey Rok.”

“D.” Brian replied with a sigh. “I’m really sorry I just left… I just…”

Howie held up his hand, preventing him from speaking any further. “I was kind of looking for an explanation, but I’m not going to keep bothering you for one. If you want, you’ll give me one where your good and ready to… until then, I’ll just be here for whenever you need me.”

“It’s Nick.” Brian suddenly said. “I mean… he’s not the problem, it’s actually me, but the reason I left was because… I miss Nick. When we were singing, everything was fine… and when it came to his part, I actually found myself standing there, waiting for him to jump in as if he was standing right beside me or something. I must be losing it or something D.”

Howie sighed and began to walk towards the bed, sitting down on it, next to Brian. “Your not losing it Brian. To tell you the truth, I think we all stood there, waiting for him to jump in, as if he was there, you know? We’re just so used to each other, that’s all. Everything in our lives happened on cue, on a beat. When we were down, someone was always there to comfort us. When we were in trouble, someone was always there to help us out. If no one came the very next time we needed them, of course it would be awkward. Right now, Nick’s not here, and our lives are skipping a beat. We became so dependant on one another, that it feels awkward when one person is not here… and that’s expected Bri… it’s nothing abnormal, and nothing is wrong with you.”

“Well, what do I do then?” Brian had asked him helplessly. “I don’t know what to do anymore Howie. Almost everything reminds me of Nick, and brings back the nagging guilt deep within my heart. I need to talk to him again… I need to see him again.”

“Then you know what you need to do Brian.” Howie reached over to the desk beside the bed and picked up the hotel room phone and handed it to him. “You give him a call. After you get out what you’ve wanted to say, you simply let go, and let God.”

Brian hesitantly grabbed the phone and stared at it. Howie rose from the bed and began to walk out of the room. “Remember what I said Brian… and if you need anything or anyone, you know where to find me.” and with that, he left Brian alone, closing the door behind him.

Brian began to punch in the Carter’s house digits, waiting anxiously with every ring that was heard. Finally, a young female’s voice answered the phone. “Hello?”

“Hello, Leslie?” Brian asked. “Is Nick there?”

Leslie fell silent for a while, as if wondering is she should tell him the truth or not. “He is Brian, but I think he doesn’t want to talk to anyone right now.”

“Wait Les, please don’t hang up.” Brian begged. “I need you to do me a favor… just this one, simple favor. I need you to give the phone to Nick and tell him you don’t know who it is. Don’t tell him it’s me who’s calling. Can you do me this one favor sweetie?”

Leslie sighed and everything fell silent, he could hear her shuffling around as she handed the phone over to Nick. He could hear him ask her who it was, and Leslie did exactly what Brian asked of her, which was to tell Nick she didn’t know who was calling for him.

“Hello?” Nick’s gruff voice answered the phone.

“Nick, please don’t hang up buddy!” Brian quickly said.

“Who the f***? Brian… is this you? You have the nerve to be calling me right now.”

“I know that, but please don’t hang up… just give me a minute or so to tell you something… please Nick, I’m begging of you.”

“Well, hurry up, you’ve got one minute and it’s counting down now… 59... 58...”

“Okay, okay, okay!” Brian exclaimed, stopping Nick from counting. “Nick… I’m very sorry for what I’ve done to you. I know I hurt you deeply, and I’m really sorry Nick… please believe me. I did not mean to hurt you, I did not mean to lie to you. When you asked me why I never told you the truth in the first place, I was telling you the absolute truth when I said I wasn’t ready to tell you. I was afraid Nick… afraid that you would hate me for the rest of my life. I didn’t want you to shut me out Nick… especially during this time. I was going to tell you, believe me, I just thought you needed time to properly heal and everything. But in actuality, it was I who wasn’t ready to tell you from the beginning… and I only realized that now. I should’ve told you as soon as you became conscious, but I didn’t… and I’m sorry. I don’t want to lose you forever… you’re my best friend Nick… always have been, always will be.”

Nick kept silent, letting Brian’s words sink in. “You should’ve done a lot of things Brian… you had the chance to do those things, but you decided not to take those chances. That’s the problem with you Brian… you prefer to play it on the safe side, you’ve always been the one afraid to take chances, and that’s one thing you need to realize. Life is all about chances… and if none of them are taken, that what will you have learned? I always looked up to you Brian… ever since I was 12. I always thought you to be wise, smart, loyal… I always thought you to be my best friend. But best friends would never keep anything away from them. You’ve blinded me for years Brian… you kept me from seeing who you really were, but now I see who you are…”

Brian started to cry at this point. “Nick, I’m still the same person you’ve known for the past 14 years! I thought I was being your best friend by thinking what was best for you. Now, I’ve realized that I was being nothing but a coward for keeping you in the dark. Right now, I’m being your best friend by admitting my faults and apologizing. A best friend would literally break down to their knees and would beg, plead and cry for your forgiveness. I’ve let you beat me without resisting… I’ve let you yell at me without yelling back. I don’t know how else I can say that I’m sorry… if you want me to write it in blood, I’ll do just that. And Nick, if you hadn’t realized, I’m taking a chance right now… I took a chance by calling you, I’m taking a chance right now by telling you how I feel and apologizing over and over. Now, I thought you were my best friend because I thought you knew me better than that, but obviously, you don’t. You think of me to be the one who would always play on the safe side, never wanting to take chances. Well, to tell you the truth, I’ve took many chances in my life Nick… I’ve taken more chances than you will ever know.”

“Well, what do you expect me to do Brian? Forgive you and let everything go back to the way it used to be? If you hadn’t notice, this accident has changed all of us… things will never go back to the way it used to be. AJ can only remember his 12 years of existence for crying out loud. How can I forgive you for this Brian?”

Brian remained silent, thinking his question over. “I thought best friends are always forgiving…”

Nick scoffed. “But remember, your not my best friend anymore…”

“Well, if you were such a good friend, then why don’t you seem to remember that I am one who will never give up and let go, no matter what you do or say? I won’t let this accident take away the best of me… the best of us. I would rather die than to let this man think that he has the best of all of us.”

“Open your eyes Brian!” Nick snapped. “Don’t you get it? He’s already got the best of us. Everything has slipped from our grasp, we’re not in control anymore. Things will never go back to the way they were, no matter what you do or how hard you try. Look at us Brian, and where we are now… not only did this man get the best of us, but he’s also left our lives incomplete. You should just give up already…”

“That’s exactly what he wants!”

“I don’t care anymore…” Nick replied in a mutter. “Because he already has what he wants… you’ve passed your one minute limit… goodbye Brian.” and with that, the line went dead.

Howie remained there, standing by Brian’s ajar door. He had heard the whole conversation, and when they stopped talking, Howie glanced in and seen Brian sitting there, holding his head in his hands, crying. Howie turned away and walked back into Kevin’s room, seeing AJ lying on Kevin’s bed, flicking through channels, and Kevin sitting on the chair near the balcony, watching as AJ surfed through the channels.

“Is he okay?” Kevin asked, looking up at Howie and watching him as he sat down on the bed next to AJ.

Howie shook his head and sighed. “It was the thought of Nick that was bothering him… he called him, and from the way he just sat on the bed and cried, I’m taking it the conversation didn’t go that well.”

AJ decided to leave the channel on MTV, and he placed the remote down on the bed. “Dude, this whole… Nick situation is affecting him more than I thought, why is that?”

“Brian and Nick were the best of friends, and now…” Kevin paused, trying to think of the right words to say. “Well, things are changing now because of the accident.”

AJ rolled his eyes, “I don’t know why Nick is mad at Brian anyway… if you ask me, the only person he should be mad at is that bastard that ran us off the road and tried to kill us…”

Howie froze at what AJ said. “You don’t think… that guy would try to go after Nick, especially now because he isn’t with us, right?”

Kevin shrugged, “I’m not sure… I wouldn’t think so because he’s with his family, and all our families are being guarded as well.”

“But what happens if he goes somewhere… without his family?”

“Then Vince would follow him wherever he goes.”

“But Kevin, you know Nick… he knows how to get away from his bodyguard… he’s done it before, who’s to say he won’t try to do it now.”

Howie was making a good point, but Kevin shook his head. “What reason would he have to try and get away from his family… his bodyguard? He knows well enough that the killer’s still out there, I wouldn’t think he’d try and go somewhere by himself knowing that.”

“But that’s the thing… he’s not thinking clearly right now because of all that is happening. He is so mad at us and Aaron’s death, I think he’s forgotten that our killer is still out there.”

Kevin fell silent for a while, thinking over what Howie had said. Nick was always known for running of somewhere whenever he was mad or needed time alone, and he was good at escaping from his bodyguard as well as everyone else. “Then what do you suppose we do? Call him and tell him that he needs to come back here and stay with all of us at the hotel? I don’t think that’ll go over so well.”

Howie shrugged, “I don’t know, but we got to do something. For all we know, this guy could be watching our every move, and what if he knows that Nick is not with us? He would use that as the perfect opportunity to strike at Nick, when he’s alone and vulnerable.”

AJ shook his head, “He wouldn’t strike so soon, would he? I mean, if he knows that we’re all out of the hospital and are being heavily guarded, I really don’t think he’d try anything right now… if anything, I think he’s gonna wait, until this hype dies down.”

“If anything,” Kevin began. “I think the only person we have to worry about right now if Brian… Nick’s with his family, he’ll be fine… we all know Brian’s trying to fight this alone, by himself. I think he’s the person that’ll be more susceptible to leaving off somewhere by himself.”

“Well, what do we do?” Howie asked.

“I’ll call Johnny and tell him to heighten the security team for Nick, as for us, I want someone to be with Brian at all times, or at least keep an eye on him. I do not neither of us to go off somewhere by ourselves, and if we do, make sure you tell someone and bring a security guard with you wherever you decide to go. Do we have an understanding?”

Both Howie and AJ nodded.

“AARON!!!”

“Nick, what in the hell are you doing? We will go and find them as soon as we all get off this side of the bus, but we can’t have you jumping off into god knows where like an idiotic fool!”

“You don’t understand, look at this fucking bunk! It’s cut in half… AJ wasn’t in that fucking bunk, Aaron was! I need to find them…”

“Nick!”

“Stay here and watch Brian… I’ll go look for Kev, Jay and Aaron…”

“You need to stop replaying the accident through your mind…”

Brian turned around and seen Aaron standing there, staring at him. “Is this…”

“Another dream?” Aaron finished off for him. “Yeah, sure… but this dream would’ve been a nightmare if it wasn’t for me intervening. You really need to stop replaying this accident through your mind, it’s not healthy. I know it’s hard, because your not in control of your dreams and all, but you tend to dream of what is bothering you or what your truly thinking about.”

Brian sighed, “Well, if that’s the case, I should’ve been dreaming of Nick placing a gun to my head and pulling the trigger, because that’s what I feel like right now… like I’m dead to him.”

Aaron snapped his fingers and the dream changed. They were now standing in the middle of the ocean, on top of the water. Brian began to freak out when he looked down and realized that he was standing on water. Aaron simply laughed, “Geez, calm down Brian… it’s a dream, remember? Anything can happen. Now, take a walk with me.”

“To where?” Brian asked him, trying to get used to the feeling of literally walking on water. “We’re standing in the middle of the damn ocean!”

Aaron shook his head and chuckled to himself. “Just shutup and walk…”

They both began to walk across the water in silence, Aaron staring straightforward, but Brian looking down, seeing a school of fish follow every step he took. “So,” Aaron began. “you called Nick today, right?”

Brian nodded, “Yeah… and as you can guess, things didn’t go over to well.”

Aaron stopped in his tracks and looked at Brian. “Oh, I don’t need to guess… I already know. I know every single word that was exchanged between you and Nick. I seen what you did after Nick hung the phone up on you… I know what Nick did after he hung up the phone.”

Aaron began walking again, and Brian just stood there, staring at him. “What did he do?”

“He did the same thing as you did Bri… he cried.”

Brian started to walk again and caught up with Aaron, standing behind him. “He did?”

Aaron nodded, “Yups… he cried like a little baby. You see, this whole thing is affecting him more than you think it is. He’s putting on this tough, outer shell, but not to worry… those hard layers will shed away and you’ll have Nick back. But, do you want to know what’s the fastest way to shed his layers?”

Brian nodded. “You need to stop biting your tongue and say what you really mean. You need to start acting the same way he’s acting towards you. Be a jackass to him.”

“What?!” Brian asked him in shock. “What do you mean be a jackass to him, I can’t do that. That’s the last thing he needs right now.”

“And how would you know what exactly he needs right now?” Aaron asked him. Brian fell silent and thought about it. “You see, if you start acting to him the same way he’s acting to everyone else, he’ll see his reflection within you… he’ll feel intimidated, and he’ll break… and once he does, he’ll come crawling back to you, wanting the ‘old you’ back. I mean, I’m not saying it’s a bad thing to be nice to him, it is good… but sometimes he uses that as an advantage. While your on your knees begging and pleading for his forgiveness, he’ll use your weakness against you… wanting pity from anyone, especially you. You can’t give him pity… he’s old enough to deal with life, he’s not a little kid anymore. You need to put him in his place and stop biting your tongue. He’s breaking you apart, piece by piece by making you go out of your way to give him sympathy and pity. Don’t give him that Brian… because he’ll only make you keep doing what your doing, and you will break in time. You need to stand up to him, I know it’s hard because he’s your best friend… but if it’s what’ll bring him back, then by all means go and do it.”

Brian sighed, “But… I can’t talk to him anymore, I mean, he won’t talk to me anymore. There’ll be no reason for me to… act that way towards him.”

Aaron stopped walking and turned to face Brian. “There will be a reason. He’s going to do something radical, and that’ll be your opportunity to break him down. Now, wake up and go see what it is.”

Brian opened his eyes and found himself staring at his ceiling. He turned in his bed and looked over at the clock that was sitting on the small table near his bed. It was 9:25 am, he had slept almost the whole day yesterday after he had got off the phone with Nick. He rubbed his hand over his face and got up off his bed. He opened his door and looked out into the hallway, seeing no one in sight. He walked over towards Kevin’s room and knocked four times, waiting for someone to answer the door.

Kevin immediately opened the door all the way to allow Brian to walk inside. “Well good morning Sleeping Beauty.”

Brian rolled his eyes as he walked into the room, finding Howie on the phone and AJ sitting on a chair near the balcony, surfing through TV channels. “What’s going on here? You guys throwing a party without me?” Brian asked no one in particular.

“No.” Kevin responded. “We all gathered here because we were gonna go down to the café to get some breakfast… care to join us?”

“Well, I guess so since I’m up.”

As AJ continued to flick through the channels, something on MTV had caught his attention. He quickly switched it back to MTV and seen a picture of all five of them. “Hey you guys…” he called out. “Isn’t that us?”

Kevin, Brian and Howie turned their attention onto the TV as AJ turned the volume up.

“It’s almost been a month since the Backstreet Boys were involved in a serious bus accident that killed Aaron Carter and left all five members hospitalized. Today, Nick Carter, AJ McLean, Brian Littrell, Howie Dorough and Kevin Richardson are all out of the hospital and are healing quite well, but the only thing that doesn’t seem to be healing at all is the band itself. Nick Carter, the youngest member of the Backstreet quintet has went public today in announcing the disbandment of the Backstreet Boys. The cause of the breakup is still unknown, but it is said from Nick Carter that, quote: “Due to personal reasons, I have decided today that I am through with the band. We will have a meeting with our management today and come to a mutual agreement that the Backstreet Boys will be no more.” That is your news for now, for more on the breakup of the Backstreet Boys, login to mtv.com and click on MTV news. Stay tuned for more news every ten to the hour, right here on MTV.”

The four of them looked at each other in shock, AJ grabbing the remote and clicking the TV off.

“Um mom, I gotta go… no, everything’s fine, I’ll be sure to call you back later… okay… love you to… goodbye.” Howie hung the phone up and just stared at the TV, no one said anything.

There was a knock on the door, and they all turned around to see Marcus opening the door and peering in. “We need you all now down to the second floor, in the meeting hall.”

Kevin turned to look at the rest of them. “Lets go.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Once they arrived there, they seen Johnny seated at the head of the long table, and Nick was seated on the left side of the table, near Johnny. The four of them slowly and quietly walked into the room, sitting on the right side of the table, directly across from Nick.

“So,” Johnny leaned forward in his chair and clasped his hands together. “do we all know why we’re here?”

“Yeah, we heard the unfortunate news before Marcus came to get us…” Kevin replied in a monotone voice. “And I would just like to ask one question… Nick, who the fuck are you to go and breakup the band behind our backs?”

“I have my reasons Kevin…” Nick replied ever so calmly. “Reasons I’m sure you all know of, so I really don’t think you have the right to ask me who the fuck I am to go and breakup the band… and for your information, I didn’t breakup the band… I just quit.”

Howie’s face twisted in puzzlement. “But, it was announced on MTV news that you broke up the band.”

“And your gonna believe the media?” Nick asked in an eerie tone. “We’ve been in this business for how long Howie? You should know better than to believe the media…”

“So why do you want to quit?” AJ asked him.

Nick turned his look towards AJ, and his glare softened. “We’ve come to the end of the road boys…”

“Look,” Johnny interjected for the first time. “why don’t we just take another hiatus. Nick, you can’t disband this group by yourself.”

“You wanna make a fucking bet?” Nick asked.

Johnny shook his head, “No, but it says in the contract that the only way this group can be disbanded is if there’s a mutual agreement between all five members.”

Nick slammed his hands on the table, causing all of them except for Kevin to jump in reaction. “I don’t give a fuck what you all decide to do… all I know is that I’m out of this group… you guys can all go and fuck yourselves.” and with that, he snapped up from his seat and left the room.

Everyone remained where they were, staring at one another in shock. Brian glared up at Nick, watching him as he left the room. “There will be a reason. He’s going to do something radical, and that’ll be your opportunity to break him down. Now, wake up and go see what it is.”

Brian snapped up from his chair as well and walked out of the room. Nick was about to push the elevator button, but Brian rushed him and tackled him into the wall.

Nick’s eyes fell shut when he felt the wind being knocked out of his lungs. When he opened his eyes once again, he seen Brian standing before him, pinning him to the wall. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” Nick asked him.

Brian grabbed the collar of Nick’s shirt and pulled him forward, slamming him back into the wall. “No, the question is what the fuck is wrong with you. I’m tired of you Nick, I’m tired of apologizing, I’m tired of kissing your sorry ass, I’m tired of sitting back and allowing you to walk all over me. I’m fucking tired of it all already. No longer will I beg and plead for your forgiveness… you can be mad at me all you want, but there is no fucking way in hell I’m gonna let you break up this group, because it wasn’t them who refused to tell you about Aaron’s death, it was I.”

Nick tried to break the grasp on his shirt, but Brian only tightened it and slammed him back into the wall. “We aren’t the ones you should be mad at… if anything, you should be mad at the fucker who ran us off the road and tried to kill us all… he’s the one who put Aaron six feet below the earth, not us.”

“Let me go!” Nick screamed, tears streaming down his face. Deep inside, he knew Brian was right, but he didn’t want him to know it.

“I’ve been the one who’s been doing all the listening, now… your gonna listen to me this time. I’m saying this for the last fucking time… I’m sorry. You can take it or leave it, I no longer give a shit what you do. Now, the only fucking way you’ll be able to leave this group is to get to that contract and void it… and the only way you’ll be able to get to that contract is through me… and I hope you know that I never give up… and I never let go.”

Brian released his grip just a bit, and Nick took that as an opportunity to strike. He rose his left arm and launched his fist forward, connecting it with Brian’s temple. Brian staggered backwards, everything spinning around him. Nick tackled Brian to the ground and pinned him there, preparing to strike at his face again, but someone had grabbed his fist and had hauled him off of Brian. When he looked up, he seen Kevin squeezing his wrist, pushing him back away from Brian.

“You son of a bitch!” Nick screamed, but Kevin simply shoved him back into the wall near the elevator.

Meanwhile, both Howie and AJ were helping Brian off the ground. Once Brian stood, he seen Nick standing against the wall near Kevin, and he rushed at Nick, but Johnny and Howie grabbed him, pulling him back.

“That’s enough!” Kevin’s voice roared.

The elevator made a “ding” noise and the doors slid open. Brian broke away from the grasp Johnny and Howie had on him and walked right into the elevator, bypassing everyone. Before he got onto the elevator, he stopped beside Nick and glared at him. “I hope your happy…” he sneered before he got onto the elevator and the doors slid close.

Nick allowed his head to fall back and hit the wall behind him. Johnny, AJ and Howie walked away, back towards the meeting hall, leaving Kevin and Nick standing there alone. Nick opened his teary eyes and just stared at Kevin, before he too turned and left him. Nick began to cry, his sobs wracking his body. He allowed himself to slide down the wall until he was sitting on the ground, covering his face as tears continued to spew from his eyes. Now, he truly felt alone and only now did he realize that it was all his fault.

Brian went right down to the café and had ordered himself a cup of coffee. He sat at the table all alone, slowly sipping his steaming hot cup of brew. He slowly and gently touched the small cut on the left side of his cheek, feeling a dab of sticky blood.

“Mind if I join you?”

Brian looked up to see AJ standing before him. He shook his head, “No, not at all…”

AJ pulled the chair out and sat down in front of Brian, remaining silent for a while. “I would just love to know… where the hell that came from.”

“Where the hell did what come from?” Brian asked him back, taking another sip of his coffee.

“You know…” AJ paused. “the way you and Nick were going at it. I thought you two were best friends.”

“Were.” Brian punctuated. “We were best friends, not anymore. I’m seriously tired of begging for his forgiveness, I have more important things to do.”

“Oh.” AJ fell silent for a while. “Do you honestly think Nick’s gonna quit the group?”

“Nah.” Brian replied shaking his head. “So much is running through his mind right now, it’s as if he doesn’t realize what he’s doing or saying. Just need to give him time, that’s all.”

AJ looked away, looking over towards where they were serving food. As his eyes began to scan the room, one particular person had caught his eye. It was an older man sitting there in the distance, drinking coffee and staring at him. AJ continued to stare at the man, something was going off in his mind. The man continued to sip his coffee and he began to grin when he noticed that AJ was struggling to remember something he should know.

AJ’s eyes began to flutter close as he forced his mind to remember where he saw this man, why he seemed so familiar.

“Damnit D., didn’t I tell you to stay up there with Brian?”

“Brian’s fine, where could he possibly go?” Howie replied. “It’s them we need to worry about.”

AJ opened his eyes for a while to see both Nick and Howie standing there. He felt pain exploding through the lower part of his body, something was pinning his body in an awkward position. Though he was in the back, near the bathroom, he could still se right through the bunks. Someone had approached them from behind, but AJ couldn’t get a word out to warn them. The man wrapped his arms around Howie’s waist and had hoisted him into the air.

“One more step, and I’ll blow his fucking brains out!” the man shouted.

“Oh my god…” AJ rasped.

The man simply smiled, knowing AJ now knew who he was.

“What is it Jay?” Brian asked him, getting worried at AJ’s sudden odd behavior.

AJ didn’t respond. He simply pushed his mind further into remembering more about this man, he needed to remember more so that he could tell Brian that their killer was right there. All of a sudden, there was a sharp pain that shot through his head, causing his eyes to roll in the back of his head and for him to fall right out of his seat and onto the ground.

“AJ!” Brian shouted as he snapped out of his seat and went over to AJ’s unconscious form. “C’mon AJ, get up.” Brian began to pat AJ’s cheeks, hoping that it would wake him up, but it was no use. “Someone get me help please!”

Both Howie and Kevin busted through the two doors, rushing in and running up to the receptionist’s desk. “Can you tell us which room Alexander James McLean is in?”

The elderly receptionist looked up, “I’m sorry sir, would you please calm down and tell me the name again slowly.”

“Alexander James McLean.” Howie repeated slowly. “He was brought in here and there was another man with him, could you please tell me which room he’s in.”

The woman nodded and began to type on her computer. “Yes, he’s in room A101, what your gonna do is take this right and go right down the corridor, it’s the second room on the right side.”

They both thanked her before they left down the corridor to AJ’s room. Once they got there, they opened the door and seen both Dr. McNorton and Brian standing there near AJ’s bed, talking.

“What happened?” Kevin asked all out of breath.

“It seems as if Alex overworked his brain.” Dr. McNorton replied. “Remember when I told you guys not to force everything onto him at once, for it’ll work up his brain and it might lead to either painful or lethal consequences? Well, he just fell unconscious. When he awakes, he might not remember what happened or how it happened, so not to worry. He’ll be fine, I just want to keep him in at least until tonight to reevaluate his brain activity.”

Dr. McNorton turned to walk out of the room, leaving the three of them standing there in the room, staring down at AJ’s unconscious form.

“What happened?” Howie questioned softly.

Brian fell in a trance, staring at AJ’s body. “I don’t know.” he shrugged. “One minute, we were talking, then before I knew it, he just dropped out of his seat. He was staring at something and said “oh my god”… I had asked him what the problem was, but he didn’t answer me. He just continued to stare at god knows what, and then his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he fell out of his seat.”

“Something or someone?” Kevin asked.

Brian tore his look away from AJ and had looked over at Kevin. “Something, someone… I don’t really know. He was looking towards the food line.”

“You don’t think he was looking at someone in line or something?”

“I don’t know!” Brian snapped. He didn’t mean to sound so rude and harsh, but he was just as freaked out as they were, and having them ask him loads of questions he couldn’t answer wasn’t helping the matter. “Look, I’m sorry I yelled, but I just don’t know Kevin… if I knew he was staring at someone, I would’ve told you. He could’ve been staring at someone, but I wouldn’t be able to tell you if he was and who it was. I didn’t see what he saw, I wasn’t looking at what he was staring at, all I was worried about at that moment was him and his odd behavior. Does that answer all your questions?”

Kevin nodded and remained silent, not wanting to pressure his cousin further. Howie looked down at his watch, “C’mon you guys, we should be getting back to the hotel, we have another conference with Johnny.”

Brian turned towards Howie. “We have another what?”

Kevin sighed, “Johnny called another meeting, I don’t know what about, so don’t ask.”

“But… what about AJ? We can’t just leave him here without anyone.”

“Marcus drove Howie and I here… he’ll stay and we’ll drive the car back to the hotel.”

Brian turned to look at AJ once more, staring at him for a while. He nodded and followed Howie and Kevin out of the room.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“I don’t know about this Kevin… I mean, Johnny will really have my ass if he knew I let you guys take the car and drive back to the hotel by yourselves.”

“Then we’ll just say we snuck past you and took the car to get back to the hotel. He wouldn’t care anyway if we tell him that we did it so we could come back to attend his meeting.”

Marcus sighed and looked away, “Why can’t I just call Earl or something? I’ll tell him to come down here and pick you guys up.”

“What’s the use in doing that if the hotel is only a couple blocks down? Look dude, we’ll be fine, we’ll call you as soon as we get back to the hotel, I promise.”

Marcus rolled his eyes and remained silent. “And what car do you expect me to be driving?”

Kevin chuckled, “What car would you need to be driving if your job is to stay here overnight and watch AJ? We’ll be back tomorrow morning to get you guys once they discharge him.”

Marcus continued to stare at Kevin, thinking it over. With a sigh, he fished into his pockets and pulled out the keys to the SUV. “Here… and don’t worry about Johnny, I’ll take care of him. You guys are gonna go straight to the hotel, nowhere else! No detours, no shortcuts, nothing! Take the normal route to get back to the hotel, and I want you to call as soon as you get to the hotel, you got me?”

Kevin grabbed the keys and smiled. “Not to worry Marc… thanks a bunch!”

He turned and began to walk out of the hospital, Brian and Howie following suit. They entered the lower parking lot and had scanned the place, seeing that there were several large, black SUV’s parked in the place.

“Great.” Brian muttered. “did he forget to mention that we had to play hide-and-seek with the damn car?”

Kevin rolled his eyes and had rose the car remote, pushing the alarm button. The alarm to their SUV began to go off, and they found it to be in the far right corner of the parking lot. “What a place to park!”

Kevin unlocked the doors and they all got in, Brian sitting in the backseat, Kevin taking the driver’s seat and Howie sitting shotgun. He started the car and had pulled out of the stall, driving out of the parking lot of the hospital.

“Brian, what were you and AJ talking about before he fell unconscious?” Howie asked.

Brian was staring out the window, watching every tree they passed. “What’s with the 21 questions?”

Howie sighed, “I’m not asking you 21 questions, I simply asked you one question, hoping for you to give me a simple answer.”

Brian licked his lips, not meaning to be so cocky towards them. “We were talking about Nick… he was asking me if Nick was really going to leave the group before he had that little… episode.”

“And you say he was staring off to the food line?”

Brian growled under his breath. “Geez Howie, what in the hell is with all your questions? I already told you he was staring at something before he fell unconscious.”

Howie shook his head. “Correction Brian… he was staring at someone, not something.”

“And what makes you think that?”

“Think about it… Dr. McNorton said he was overworking his brain in trying to remember something. He had to be staring at someone and he tried to force his brain to remember something.”

“For all we know Howie, he could’ve been staring at the food and it brought back some sort of memory.”

“Some sort of memory of food that would frighten him?” Howie asked. Brian fell silent. “Just think about it Brian, he was staring at someone who might’ve struck his memory, and if he was staring at someone who struck his memory and made him frighten, who do you think he might’ve been staring at?”

“Our killer.” Kevin replied.

Howie nodded. “This is what I think happened. He looked off to the side and seen, him. Now remember, Dr. McNorton said almost anything can bring his memory back, whether it’d be people, an object, word, music, whatever! Lets just say that when AJ saw this man, he forced his brain to think of where he might’ve seen him before, and it brought back the memory of the accident. Put two and two together, you get a frightened AJ who overworked his brain in trying to remember something, anything about this man.”

Kevin looked over at Howie, “But… how can it be that he would remember anything of the accident? He was trapped in the bathroom when the accident occurred, how could he have possibly seen what this man looked like if he was trapped in the bathroom unconscious?”

“Then there’s gotta be something he’s not telling us…”

Before anyone could say anything, something slammed into their car from behind, causing them all to jerk forward. “What the fuck?” Kevin exclaimed as he looked into the rearview mirror and seen a black, tinted navigator behind them, preparing to ram into their car again.

“Speed it up!” Brian yelled, looking back just in time to catch the navigator running into the back of their car once more.

Kevin pushed his foot down on the gas pedal, causing their speed to increase to 60. The car behind them then swerved to the side, driving up to the driver’s side of the car and matching their speed. Kevin looked to the side and squinted his eyes, trying desperately to see through the window at who the driver was, but the windows of the car was all tinted. “This cannot be happening again!”

“Hit the breaks!” Howie suggested.

Kevin nodded and was about to slam on the breaks, but before he could do that, the navigator swerved to the side and had rammed into the side of their car, causing them to drift off road and tumble into a small ditch.

Kevin’s eyes shot open and he found himself dangling upside down. There was a tight pressure on his chest and stomach area, and when he looked down, he seen that his seatbelt was still latched. He looked off to the side and seen Howie strapped upside down as well.

“Is everyone alright?” Kevin asked.

“Yeah.” came Brian’s soft reply. Kevin turned his head slightly to see that his cousin was not latched into his seat, handing upside down. In fact, he was on his knees, the roof of the car now being the bottom.

“Why the hell are we hanging upside down?” Howie asked no one in particular.

“Our car flipped over and we landed on our roof top.” Kevin responded, reaching down his seat to unbuckle the belt.

Once he unlatched it, he immediately dropped from his seat, landing painfully on the shards of glass that was below him. “Shit.” he muttered, the pieces of glass protruding from his skin. “Howie, can you get free?”

Howie reached down to the buckle and began to unlatch it. “I think so.”

“Be careful” was Kevin’s only response before Howie dropped from his seat and landed on the roof top. Kevin began to kick the door open on his side, and after a couple of hard kicks, he was able to get the mangled door open. They all crawled out and had walked up out of the small ditch and onto the side of the road.

Kevin pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and had dialed Marcus’s number. After a couple of rings, Marcus finally answered. “Hello?”

“Hey man,” Kevin replied. “You want to do us a favor?”

“You guys made it to the hotel already?”

Kevin turned to look at the bust-up SUV that was now lying in the small ditch on the side of the road. “Well, not exactly…”

“Not exactly? What in the hell do you mean not exactly?”

“We were ran off the road… again.”

“What?!?”

“Don’t worry though… we’re all fine, nothing we need to be readmitted into the hospital for. We just need you to come and pick us up.”

“And how in the hell do you expect me to get to you guys? You guys took my car, remember?”

“Well, can’t you catch a cab out here or something?”

The other line fell silent for a while. “Fine, whatever! You guys stay right where you are, did you take the same route back to the hotel?”

“Yup, just drive until your SUV down in a ditch on the side of the road.”

“I want you guys to go back down to the ditch and stay by the car, in case that guy comes back around. If anything else happens before I get there, call me back immediately.”

Kevin nodded. “Will do… thanks Marc.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“I cannot believe this…” Johnny muttered to himself as he paced back and forth in Kevin’s room.

Both Howie and Brian were in the bathroom, busy taking out the small shard of glass that was stuck in their arms. Meanwhile, Kevin was sitting on his bed and taking out the glass that was stuck in his arms. “Yeah, we can’t believe it either Johnny.”

Johnny stopped his pacing. “You guys could’ve been killed Kevin! How can you take this situation so lightly?” he looked down at Kevin’s arm and seen blood ooze out the spot where Kevin removed the small piece of glass. “I’m taking you guys to the hospital.”

“This is nothing we need to go into the hospital for. Sure, this fucker ran us off the road, but he didn’t kill us… and we sustained non-life threatening minor injuries.”

Johnny turned and glared at Marcus. “This is all your fault!”

“Hey, hey, hey!” Brian interjected, walking out of the bathroom and in between Marcus and Johnny. “If you want to blame anyone, blame the three of us!”

“Two of them!” Howie yelled out.

Brian shrugged, “Okay, two us then… me and Kevin. It was our ideal to take the keys away from Marcus. It was our ideal to drive ourselves back to the hotel. This was all our doings, Marcus had nothing to do with it.”

“Bullshit!” Johnny scoffed. “Marcus is a big man, how in the hell could he let you guys bypass him and sneak the keys right out of his pocket?”

“Easy.” Kevin retorted.

Johnny turned to look at Marcus once more and pointed his finger at him. “Your fired.”

“What?! But… but why?” Marcus began to stammer.

“Now wait just a goddamn minute!” Kevin said, rising from his bed. “You have no right to fire Marcus, because his specific duty was to protect AJ, not us. He was doing just that before all this shit happened. I persuaded him to give me the keys so I could drive us back to the hotel, since we were only a couple blocks away. Now, if your gonna fire him, then you might as well say goodbye to the rest of us…”

Johnny fell silent for a while, thinking over what Kevin had said. He was upset with Marcus, but at the same time, he didn’t want to lose his band. “This is it! No one is to go anywhere by themselves. You will all have your bodyguards by your side at all times, no if, ands or buts about it.” and with that, he stormed out of the room.

They all remained silent for a while, before Marcus turned and pointed an accusing finger at Kevin. “I swear…”

“I know, I know…” Kevin interrupted him. “Never again Marc, we promise.”

Marcus sighed and looked down at his watch, checking the time. “Oh shit, I have to get back to AJ!”

AJ’s eyes fluttered open, the sound of someone shuffling about in his room had awoken him. The room was dark, there was a faint glow, but not enough to help him see if someone was in the room with him.

“Marcus?” he called out, but received no response.

He rose a little off his bed, only to be pulled back and a sharp blade placed at his throat. “Say one word or scream, and I’ll slit your fucking throat!” the voice threatened.

AJ tried to turn to see who it was, but the grip tightened harder, making him unable to move. “Look, I’ll give you whatever you want…”

The man pressured the blade deeper into his throat. “Didn’t I just tell you not to say one word? If you wanna give me what I want, then I want you to keep your fucking mouth shut so I won’t have to spew your fucking blood all over this damn bed.”

AJ nodded and tried to shy away from the blade that was painfully pushed into his throat, but it was no use. The man roughly yanked AJ off the bed and began to pull him to the door, but stopped when he heard someone outside the door, jingling the knob around.

“AJ… this is Marcus, open up!”

The man turned to look at AJ, but AJ remained quiet. He grabbed him by the back of the neck and began to shove him towards the window. “C’mon, we’re going out through the window…”

AJ stopped in his tracks, backing away so the man couldn’t push him anymore. “You… you were the one who ran us off the road, we’re you?”

The man turned and swiped his knife at AJ, slicing his arm. AJ quickly backed away, but not fast enough because he felt a stinging sensation coarse through his right forearm. He backed away until he hit the corner of the room, and he just slid down the wall, covering his arm. The man began to advance towards AJ once again, but stopped when he heard someone beginning to open the door. He quickly ran back towards the window and opened it, crawling out and running down the street.

As soon as the man left, the door swung open, revealing the hospital’s security guard, Dr. McNorton and Marcus. “Oh shit…” Marcus muttered as he seen AJ on the ground in the corner of the room.

He began to walk towards AJ and had bent down in front of him. “AJ, are you okay?”

AJ looked up and just stared at Marcus. “It was him… he got into my room somehow, I don’t know how though…”

Marcus began to scan his body, finding his right arm to be bloody. “Oh god, what in the hell happened? What did he do to you?”

AJ looked down at his arm and removed his hand, revealing a long slash which wasn’t deep at all. “He slashed me… I’m fine though, I just want to get out of here.”

Marcus rose from the ground and began to advance on Dr. McNorton. “How in the hell could you guys allow this to happen?”

Dr. McNorton began to back away from the larger man. “Your blaming us for this incident? It was your job to be here and protect him, not ours!”

“I had to go and attend something else that was important. I had paid one of your security guards to keep an eye on him.”

“That wasn’t one of our security guards…” a voice said.

Both Dr. McNorton and Marcus turned around to see the nurse that was appointed to AJ standing there. “What do you mean that wasn’t one of our security guards?” Dr. McNorton asked.

The young nurse looked up at both of them. “The man you paid doesn’t work here at all… I’ve never seen him around this facility before… at least not in my five years of working here.”

“And when in the hell were you going to tell me this?” Marcus snapped.

The young nurse began to cry silently. “I was there when you paid him… I was there right before he walked into AJ’s room. I saw the knife he was hiding in his pants. He threatened to kill me if I had told anyone of his intentions… he gave me your money because he wanted me to lock him in the room, I refused at first, but he threatened to kill me right there on the spot… I’m sorry.”

Dr. McNorton walked up to the young nurse and had embraced her in his arms, walking her sobbing form out of the room. Marcus turned around and seen AJ now standing, using the wall to support him. “C’mon.” Marcus sighed. “Lets get you out of here man…”

Kevin was about to walk into his bathroom to take a shower, but was stopped when Marcus busted into his room, carrying AJ along with him. “What in the hell happened?” Kevin asked, shock written all over his face. “I thought they weren’t going to release him until tomorrow…”

“Pack your things.” was all Marcus said in reply as he sat AJ down on Kevin’s bed. “We’re leaving, now.”

Kevin could only stand there and watch in puzzlement as Marcus brushed past him and went right into the bathroom, grabbing a white hand towel. “What do you mean we’re leaving now?”

“Just pack your shit now and lets go.” Marcus snapped. He didn’t mean to sound so harsh, but he knew he had to get the boys out of the hotel, now.

Kevin remained standing there, staring at them. He watched as AJ removed his hand from his right arm, revealing a bloody slash. Marcus handed him the hand towel he had grabbed out of the bathroom. “What in the hell happened?”

“That’s the reason why we’re leaving this hotel now.” Marcus replied. “This guy is striking closer and closer to home.”

Kevin’s eyes widened. “You mean to tell me that this bastard attacked AJ in the hospital?! But… how could this…”

“Look!” Marcus interrupted. “I’ll tell you the whole story once we leave, but I need you to do a couple of things right now. First of all, start packing your shit so we can leave. Second of all, do not ask me anymore questions until we get out of here. Third of all, you cannot let Johnny know what happened to AJ… he’ll really have my a**.”

“Then what would be our reason for leaving?”

Marcus paused for a while, thinking it over. “We’ll just say when he ran you guys off the road, he had followed us back to the hotel when I came to pick you guys up.”

“And where do you expect us to go?”

Marcus sighed, “Didn’t I say not to ask anymore questions?”

“Yeah, but these are questions that are not pertaining to AJ or the incident. We need to know where we’re going first before we even get there.”

“We’re going to bring you guys back to your homes… we’ll set up a security team to guard each house.”

“Do you really think going home is the best place to go? I mean, if this guy knows our every move, I would think he also knows where we all live and that we’ll be leaving the hotel tonight to go back to our homes.”

“That is why we’re going to sneak you guys out of here?”

Kevin cocked an eyebrow. “Sneak us out of here?” he repeated.

“Yes… sneak you guys out of here. I’ll tell Johnny my plan while you guys pack your shit. We’re gonna have the management team stay here, which means I and the rest of your personal security guards will remain here while the newly appointed team of bodyguards drive you guys back to your homes. If we stay here and the guy sees us, the management, he’ll think you four are all still here.”

“Do you really think that’s going to work?”

Marcus fell silent and just stared at Kevin. “I hope so.” he bent down before AJ, who was staring off into space. “Hey buddy, I need you to do me a favor. You cannot tell Johnny what happened tonight, okay? I don’t mean to make this situation like nothing happened, but if he finds out, he’ll fire me, okay?”

AJ nodded. “Yeah.”

Marcus rose and had turned back to Kevin. “Do you have a long sleeve shirt that he can wear for now, to cover his wound?”

Kevin nodded and began to rummage through his closet, looking for a long sleeve shirt or jacket that he could let AJ use. Marcus began to walk out of the room, “I’m gonna go tell Brian and Howie to pack their stuff, then I’m gonna tell Johnny my plan. I’ll come back for you guys once we have everything settled and are ready to ship you guys out.”

Once the door closed, Kevin handed AJ his sweater and had sat on the bed next to him. “AJ, can you tell me what happened?”

AJ slipped the sweater over his head and had looked over at Kevin. “Here was there… he pulled me out of the bed and was going to force me out the window, but I refused. That’s when he swung his knife at me, catching my right arm. By the time Marcus got into the room, he was gone…”

Kevin fell silent for a while, just staring at him. He then got off the bed and had walked over to his closet to begin to pull his belongings out so he could pack them.

“Kevin?” AJ called out.

Kevin stopped shoving his clothes into his suitcase and had looked up. “Yes Jay?”

“It was him.”

Kevin just stared at AJ in puzzlement, wondering what he meant by ‘it was him’. “What do you mean ‘it was him’? What are you talking about?”

“When I was with Brian earlier today…” AJ paused and looked up at Kevin. “He was the one I saw in the café.”

He drove up to Howie’s house, parking across the street, watching as they got out of the car and walked into the house. It didn’t take long for the security guards to go back into the car and drive away, leaving Howie and his personal bodyguard all alone. He grabbed his knife out of the glove compartment in his car and had shielded it in his pants. He opened the door and got out of the car, looking up and down the street to make sure no one was around to see what he was about to do. Briskly, he ran towards the house and hid behind the bushes, peering into the house to see what was going on. He could see Howie and his bodyguard walking upstairs, that’s when he took the opportunity to enter the house.

He swiftly opened the door and walked in, being careful not to make the slightest sound. He began to ascend upstairs, peering around the corner to see if they were there. When the coast was clear, he began to walk towards the bedroom, grasping the knife that was in his pants. He stopped and hid behind the wall when the bodyguard walked out of the room and had closed the door. Before he could turn around, the man took his knife and had slid it across his throat, gashing it open. The bodyguard began to gurgle on his own blood, grasping at the gaping wound in hopes to stop the flowing blood, but nothing worked. Within seconds, he dropped to the ground, the blood pouring from his throat creating a pool around him.

The man wiped the blood off on a white handkerchief and had placed it back in his pants before he quietly opened the door to Howie’s bedroom. He could see his small form wrapped up in the blankets curled up in a fetal position on the bed. He quietly crept towards the bed, taking his knife out again and raising it high in the air. Without thinking, he began to thrust his knife down on the bed, stabbing Howie continuously. After a while, he stopped and tossed his bloody knife to the side, panting hard and sweating. He grabbed the sheets and ripped away from the limp body, he gasped.

“It was a setup.” He said to himself.

When he pulled the sheets off, it revealed some other man who wasn’t Howie. He threw sheets back over the bloody corpse and grabbed his knife on the ground. He turned when he heard a herd of men rushing up the stairs and towards the bedroom. He ran over to the window and kicked it, shattering the glass into a million pieces. The team of FBI rushed into the room and raised their guns, spraying the area. The man quickly jumped out of the window, but wasn’t fast enough because a bullet ended up in his left arm. He landed painfully hard on his back, gasping for the air that was forced out of his lungs. He grasped at his bloody arm and pushed himself up off the ground, darting off just as the FBI agents began to shoot at him through the broken window.

“You guys are to stay here for now…” Marcus said as he opened the door to a new house which was located in a remote area.

The four of them walked into the room, carrying their luggages, which was packed with their stuff from the hotel. They placed their stuff in the parlor and began to wander the new house that was brought for them to hide out in. “We sent a team of FBI agents and body doubles to your homes,” Marcus explained to them. “So in case that man decides to pay a visit to any of your homes, he’ll be greeted by the FBI.”

“When will we be able to go back to our own homes?” AJ asked.

Marcus shrugged, “Who knows? We can’t tell you anything for sure until this man is caught. He’s coming dangerously close to hurting you guys again, and we’re taking every precaution to make sure that it doesn’t happen.”

“But what about Nick? Don’t you think someone should call him and tell him it’d be best to have him here with us?”

Marcus shook his head, “He’s with his family, nothing should happen to him because his family house is already being guarded by a team of security guards.”

“Would we be able to go back to our homes to get some stuff to bring back here?”

“I’m sure we can take you tomorrow, we have to…” Marcus was cut short when his cell phone began to ring. “Hold on.” He said before he walked off to the side to answer his phone.

AJ flopped down on the couch and had grabbed the remote from off the small table that was beside him. “This is going too far…” he said as he clicked on the TV, scanning through the basic cable channels they had.

Howie sat down on the couch next to AJ, while Kevin sat on the love seat and Brian sat on the chair near the TV.

“How does you arm feel?” Kevin asked.

AJ looked down at his wrapped arm, “It’s itchy as hell…”

Marcus walked back into the room, staring at all of them. “Looks like he already paid the FBI a visit.”

All of their heads snapped up to look at him. “What do you mean? They caught him?”

“Not exactly… he showed up at Howie’s house and killed one of the security guards and his body double. Unfortunately, he was able to escape before they could capture him… they did shoot him in the arm though, which will hopefully slow down his process in going after you guys and make it easier for us to find him.”

“How in the hell is this happening?” AJ snapped, tossing the remote control to the side. “This is one man we’re dealing with here, how is it he’s able to kill and hurt people? This kind of stuff is normally not possible unless they have some other people working with them…”

“So you think there’s more people behind this?”

AJ nodded, “Logically speaking, there’s gotta be!”

But Howie shook his head, “No… it’s the same man. You said the man you saw in the café was the same one who ran us off the road. He was also the one who attacked you while you were in the hospital. He’s doing this all by himself, and he’s actually smart enough to be one step ahead of the FBI.”

“Well, I gotta get back to the hotel, there’s a team of highly trained security guards surrounding this perimeter, so there’s no way for anyone to get into this area or get out, unless their apart of the staff of management. That means you four are on lockdown here. And I mean it, none of you are to go anywhere outside of this house.” and with that, Marcus walked out of the house.

Howie groaned and had allowed his head to loll back to rest on the couch. “I really don’t think any of us are be going to be getting any sleep…”

Nick walked into his room and had closed the door behind him, the fact that there was a team of security guards downstairs was beginning to bug him more than anything. He sat down on his bed and had looked up at the small table that was beside his bed, staring at the picture frame that was positioned there. He grabbed it and had brought it close, observing the photo. It was an old picture of him and the group, one of the first pictures that was taken of them when the group was starting out.

He pulled the picture out of the frame and had folded it, placing it in his pocket. He was about to place the frame back on the table, until another photo caught his eyes. Behind the picture of him and the group was an old picture of him holding Aaron when he was a baby. He pulled that picture out of the frame and held it up close to him, just staring at it. His eyes began to water as his mind began to reminisce the days he spent with his younger brother.

He crumpled the picture within his hand and had placed it back on the table, wiping the falling tears off of his face. An ideal then popped into his mind, which caused him to look over at the closed window in his room.

“Nick?!” Leslie called out, walking upstairs and towards his room.

She stood outside, knocking a couple times before falling silent and waiting for an answer. “Nick, it’s Leslie… mom wants you downstairs…” she fell silent again, waiting for a reply, but no one responded. Hesitantly, she grabbed the doorknob and had twisted it, pushing the door open wide.

“Nick?” she called out again, walking into his room. She passed by the bathroom and had glanced in, not seeing him in there. When she walked in, he was nowhere to be found. Her eyes began to scan the room, the open window happening to catch her attention.

“God Nick…” Leslie muttered to herself, turning around to walk out of the room. “What have you gotten yourself into?”

He walked into the cemetery, drops of water beginning to fall from the sky, but it wasn’t going to stop him from going to see his brother’s grave. With every second that passed by, the rain began to fall faster and harder, pelting his body like soft bullets. He seen a mound of dirt in the distance, and he knew instantly that it was his brother’s grave. As he neared, he noticed that there were sprouts of grass beginning to grow on the grave. He knelt down before the grave and placed his hands on the dirt mound, which was now beginning to slosh into a muddy mess because of the rain.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me…” he whispered. “It hurts so much Aaron, and I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve lost my best friend for good… but it isn’t my fault, is it?” he paused, as if waiting for an answer, but knowing one would never come. “He kept your death a secret, what best friend would do that? This all couldn’t possibly be my fault… I mean, Brian doesn’t even care anymore.” he pulled out the picture he had placed in his pocket earlier, unfolding it and staring at the group picture. “Then again… I was the one who pushed him away, I’ve pushed them all away. Brian was right… they’re not the ones I should be mad at for your death, they weren’t the reason the accident occurred in the first place.” he crumpled up the picture in his fist. “I just… I don’t know what to do anymore.”

He took a moment to pause from speaking, and that’s when he heard a twig snap, as if someone had stepped on it and broke it. He quickly whirled around, only to find no one standing there. The rain that was running down his face was beginning to blur his vision, but he shrugged the noise off, guessing it was an animal. Just when he turned to look at his brother’s grave again, a pair of arms had wrapped themselves around his chest, hauling him off the muddy ground. Nick began to struggle against the grasp, but whoever it was wouldn’t let up. The person behind him then pulled out a knife, preparing to thrust it into Nick’s stomach, but Nick whipped his head back. The man dropped the knife, but didn’t let go of Nick, instead he lifted Nick off the ground and had tossed him to the side.

Nick grunted when he felt his body slam into a tombstone, the wind being knocked out of his lungs. The man wiped away the blood that was dripping from his nose and had picked up his knife, advancing towards Nick again. Nick just laid there, trying to recollect the air that was forced out of his lungs. The man straddled Nick’s waist, lifting the knife high in the air and preparing to bring it down, but Nick reached out and had grabbed his arms, bringing the man’s knife away from him. They both struggled for a while in the rain, but Nick was able to shove the man away from him. He pushed himself up off the ground, screaming when he felt a burst of pain course through his leg. He looked down and seen the knife protruding from left thigh, and the man was scrambling to get up off the ground.

Nick didn’t wait for the man to stand; he simply took his fist and gave him an uppercut to the face, causing the man to fall back onto the ground. Once he knew that the man was dazed and wouldn’t be getting up anytime soon, he began to hobble away, the knife still stuck in his thigh. Once he got near the chapel, he hid behind the wall, making sure that the man couldn’t see where he was. He collapsed against the wall and began to slide down it, sitting on the ground. He looked down at his bloody thigh and slowly began to inch his fingers towards the protruding knife, but quickly pulled it away when a new wave of pain hit him. He winced but shoved his fist in his mouth, preventing any sound from coming out. He took a deep breath in and had grabbed the knife with two hands, quickly ripping it out of his leg. He quickly bit his tongue to keep him from screaming out; the only sound being able to escape was a small squeal. The bitter taste of blood began to fill his mouth when he realized that he had bitten his tongue harder than he expected to. He tossed the bloody knife to the side and had applied pressure to his leg, pushing down hard in hopes to stop the bleeding.

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and was about to call home, but decided not to because he knew that he would be in a lot of trouble if they found out where he went and what had happened. Hesitantly, he dialed AJ’s number.

“Hello?” a voice answered after the third ring.

“AJ.” Nick whispered. “Jay… it’s Nick.”

“Nick who?”

Nick closed his eyes, forgetting that he was still struggling in remembering who they all were. “You know… Nick… blonde hair, blue eyes.”

“Oh, that Nick. Dude, why are you calling me, I thought you were mad at all of us.”

“AJ, I need you to shutup and listen. I’m at the cemetery, and I need to know if there’s anyway you can come and get me. That fucker is here.”

“Fucker? What fucker?”

Nick sighed, “The one who ran us off the road. Look, I don’t have time to explain everything to you right now, I just need to know if there’s a way you can catch a cab to get me or something, and I need you to come by yourself.”

“I would Nick, I really would, but you see… we can’t leave the premises. Me, Howie, Brian and Kevin are in this house in some remote area and we can’t leave anywhere because we’re being heavily guarded. I could call a security guard to go and get you.”

“NO!” Nick shouted accidentally, and he quickly covered his mouth. “No… don’t call anyone.”

“What I mean is that I can call Marcus and have him pick you up. I’ll make sure he won’t say anything to anyone, and if you want I can go with him to make sure nothing is said to anybody.”

Nick closed his eyes as he thought over what AJ said. “Alright, tell him I’ll be hiding in the chapel because that man is still out there…”

“Okay, just sit tight Nick.”

“Who was that?”

AJ turned to look at Brian. “It was a friend. Hey, you guys wouldn’t happen to have Marcus’s cell phone number, would ya?”

“It’s in your cell phone.”

AJ looked down at his cell phone and began to scan through his phone book, looking for Marcus’s number. Once he found it, he pushed the call button and waited for him to pick up.

“Hello?”

“Hey Marc, it’s me… AJ.”

“What’s up Jay? What can I do for you?”

AJ fell silent and looked around; looking for somewhere private he could talk. He walked upstairs and into the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind him. “I need you to do me a favor.”

“Oh no AJ… I told you I was through with doing favors for anybody, the last time I did a favor, I almost got my ass fired…”

“Nick’s life is at stake… still don’t want to do the favor?”

“What do you mean Nick’s life is at stake? He’s at his parents house.”

“Apparently not. He called me and told me that he was at the cemetery, and so is that man.”

Marcus groaned, “Oh my god, you have got to be kidding me! No one is there with him? He’s at the goddamn cemetery by himself?”

“Yeah, but you cannot say anything to anybody… promise me that Marc…”

Marcus fell silent for a while, “AJ, this is really important. I need to tell someone what’s going on, we could capture the guy.”

“There is no fucking way I’m going to let you guys use Nick as bait.” AJ snapped, which caused Marcus to remain silent. “He does not want anyone to know anything right now… and I called you because I know I can trust you to keep your mouth shut. Please Marc… do me this one favor, I will be sure that you will not be caught… you will not lose your job, nothing will happen to you.”

Marcus sighed heavily. “Okay, okay…”

“Thank you so much Marcus! Now, before you go to the cemetery, you need to come and pick me up… I told Nick that I would go with you to pick him up.”

“Do the fellas know?”

AJ shook his head, “No… so when you get here, don’t say anything to them.”

“Okay… I’ll be there in a second.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Kevin, Howie and Brian were sitting on the couch, watching TV, but then looked up at AJ when he came downstairs and began to walk towards the door. “Where in the hell do you think your going?”

“Marcus and I are going to pick up something form the store, you guys want anything?”

The three of them just stared at AJ in puzzlement. “No…”

AJ shrugged and opened the door. “Suit yourselves.” and with that, he was out of the door and approaching the black SUV Marcus was in. as soon as he jumped in on the passenger’s side, Marcus pulled out of the driveway and began to drive down towards the cemetery.

“I cannot believe that I am doing this shit…” Marcus muttered.

AJ only smirked and began to look at the interior of the SUV. “Who the hell buys you guys these kinds of cars?”

“It’s not ours… it’s the managements.”

They both fell silent for a while, staring straight ahead. Marcus glanced down to see AJ scratching the gauze that was wrapped around his right arm. “Is your arm okay?”

AJ stopped scratching and had looked up at him. “It’s fine. The slice wasn’t that deep, so it’s scabbing pretty fast. Now, it’s just itchy as hell.”

Marcus chuckled, “I can imagine.” he replied as he turned into the cemetery. He parked in the parking lot and sat there, loading his gun with bullets.

AJ stared at the gun in shock. “You have a license to carry a gun? But… your just a bodyguard.”

“Bodyguards have more rights and licenses that you know.” He pulled out another loaded gun and handed it over to AJ. “I want you to stay in the car while I go and get Nick. If that guy is still here and tried to get to you, you do not hesitate to pull that trigger to shoot him. Lock the doors as soon as I get out of the car.”

AJ just stared at the gun Marcus handed to him. “But… but I’ve never shot someone, let alone shot a gun.”

“Just because you’ve never shot a gun, doesn’t mean you don’t know how to use one.” Marcus replied, and with that, he got out of the car and closed the door behind him.

AJ did just as he was told, locking the doors and staying in the car. Marcus began to walk towards the chapel, aiming his gun so in case he saw the man, he would just shoot him. He walked into the chapel and scanned the area, not seeing anyone in sight. “Nick?” he called out, not hearing anyone respond. “Nick?” he said a little louder this time.

Nick popped up from behind a pew. “Over here man…”

Marcus just stared at Nick, noticing that there was something wrong with him because of the way he was standing. “Man, are you okay? You look a little…”

“He got me… stabbed me in the leg.” Nick responded, walking around the pew so he was standing in front of Marcus, showing the bloody stab wound that was in his left thigh.

“Shit.” Marcus groaned as he placed his gun in the belt of his pants. “What in the hell were you doing out here by yourself anyway?”

“Well, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore…” Nick retorted, limping towards Marcus. “I didn’t know it was such a crime to come and pay my brother a visit.”

“No one said it was a crime for you to be here, but being here by yourself is… look, we told you five not to go anywhere by yourselves.”

Marcus slung Nick’s arm around his shoulder and began to walk out the chapel, but froze when they came face to face with a gun.

“Shit AJ, didn’t I say for you to stay in the car?” Marcus snapped.

“You guys were taking a little too long for my liking.” AJ replied, lowering the gun.

“What in the hell is he doing with a freaking gun?” Nick asked, confused as ever.

“I gave it to him to protect himself because he was supposed to stay in the car.” Marcus enunciated the last four words. “He wouldn’t be able to shoot it anyway, the safety’s on.”

“Oh, so you give him a gun that doesn’t even work to protect himself?”

“Can we just get out of here please!” AJ exclaimed. “I got out of the car to see what was taking you guys so long, and I can obviously see that you need help in getting Nick to the car, so can we just go?”

Both Nick and Marcus was staring at AJ, taken aback by his little outburst. AJ took Nick’s other side and helped Marcus walk Nick out of the chapel and towards the car. Marcus opened the car door and had placed Nick in the back, then both he and AJ got in.

“Look,” Marcus began, starting the car and pulling out of the graveyard. “I’m taking you to the hospital, and after that your coming back with us to this house we have in a remote area. I’ll call your parents and let them know what happened.”

“NO!” Nick shouted. “Look, I’ll go back with you guys to the house, but you cannot take me to the hospital, and you cannot tell my parents what happened. I’ll be fine, I’ve endured enough pain already, so this stab wound is nothing. Just please… don’t say anything to anyone… please Marcus.”

AJ turned to look at Marcus. “You promised me man…”

Marcus looked at Nick through the rearview mirror, staring at him for quite a while. “Well, what do you expect me to say when people ask what happened to your leg?”

Nick shrugged, “I’ll wrap it when we get to the house… I’m telling you, it’s not that painful…”

Marcus sighed heavily as he pulled into the driveway of the house. “What the hell am I getting myself into?”

Kevin, Howie and Brian snapped their heads up when the door opened, Marcus and AJ walking in, supporting Nick between them. “What happened?” Kevin asked, getting off the couch and approaching them.

“Nothing happened!” Nick replied bitterly, Marcus and AJ setting him down on the loveseat.

Brian got up off the couch as well and stood behind his cousin. “So you lied to us AJ…”

“I didn’t lie! We went to the store, look… I brought Cookies N’ Cream candy bar.” he replied, pulling out the candy. “You guys could’ve had something too and I asked you guys… but ya’ll said no!”

“So what’s Nick doing here?” Howie asked.

“We seen him on the side of the road and decided to pick him up.” AJ lied.

Nick sighed heavily, he knew that there weren’t going to stop asking questions, so he decided to tell them what had happened. “Look, I went out to the cemetery by myself and was attacked… stabbed in the leg. I called AJ, and he called Marcus and they both came to get me. I decided to come back here to stay, does that answer all of your guys questions?”

Kevin’s eyes widened. “You were stabbed in the leg?”

Nick groaned, “Yeah, but I’ll live. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go upstairs to clean up.”

Brian turned to look at Marcus. “And you didn’t bother to tell anyone?”

“Here we go… making me the criminal!” Marcus grumbled, turning away from them.

“No one is making you a criminal… but this is serious Marc!”

“Yeah, and so was the car accident…”

Nick turned to look at Brian. “You guys were in a car accident?”

“Yeah, that guy ran us off the road again, but that’s not the point! The point is that Nick was stabbed in the leg, the man attacked him at the cemetery, and if you told anyone, we could’ve caught this man and put him away for good.”

“You know what?” Marcus asked, turning back around to face Brian. “I’ve done this whole damn group a fucking favor, and it almost cost me my job! Maybe I shouldn’t have given you guys the keys in the first place, then the accident wouldn’t have happened. Maybe I shouldn’t have gone out of my way to pick you guys up, then AJ wouldn’t have been attacked. But you know what… I did all those things YOU GUYS asked of me! I gave you guys the keys because you convinced me. I left the hospital to pick you guys up because you didn’t want management to know what happened at that moment. I’ve done favors for everyone, and now I’m done! I don’t want any of you to ask anything of me anymore! I never seem to do anything right anymore… instead of doing things that might cost me my job, how about I just fucking quit already!”

“No Marcus…” Kevin quietly said, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “That is really not necessary…”

They all started talking at once, everyone except AJ and Nick. Nick was holding his head in his hands, and AJ was just staring at the chaos that was unfolding before him. “EVERYONE SHUT THE HELL UP!” AJ bellowed, causing all of them to fall silent and stare at him. “Nothing is said to anybody… got that? Marcus has done a shit load for us, so I really don’t know why the hell you guys are ridiculing him. Marcus, there is no reason for you to quit your job. Nick, go up stairs and get yourself cleaned up, I’m sure you can borrow some of Kevin’s clothes for the time being.”

They all remained silent for a while, taken aback by the new AJ who was taking charge.

“Uh… could someone help me upstairs?” Nick asked no one in particular.

Nick wrapped a towel around his waist, stepping out of the steamy shower. His leg was on fire, the warm water was burning his wound, yet soothing it. There was a soft knock on the door, and he reached over to open it slightly.

“Hey.” Brian said with a small grin. “Um, here’s Kevin’s clothes.” He passed Nick the neatly folded clothes.

“Thanks.” Nick muttered, grabbing the clothes and placing it on the counter.

“Do you need anything else? Help with anything?”

“No.” Nick sharply replied. “I definitely don’t need help from you.”

“Geez Nick, I know things are still not cool between us, but you don’t need to treat me like shit when I offer you help. It’s a simple yes or no question; I could really do without your sarcastic remarks!”

Nick scoffed. “Well, I could’ve done without a lot of the shit I had to put up with you.” He turned to walk further into the bathroom, but froze in place when he felt a sharp pain hit his leg. “Shit.” He growled through gritted teeth.

Brian rushed into the bathroom and helped him to sit on the toilet. “Would you stop pushing me away? I’ll help you, but after that I’m gone… I swear.”

“Which one would be, gone out of this house, gone out of my sight, or gone out of my life?” Nick retorted, venom dripping from his voice. “I would really want you to choose the third option.”

“Shut the fuck up Nick!” Brian exclaimed, causing Nick to fall silent. He knew whenever Brian cursed; he was either mad or annoyed. “I really don’t understand why you’re acting this way!”

“Yeah, you don’t understand… and you never will understand how it feels to lose a brother, your only brother at that!”

“You need to stop acting like you’re the only one who lost someone. We all lost someone Nick… I only have one brother, have you forgotten? I may not know how it feels to lose a brother, but I’ll tell you one thing, Aaron was like my little brother! He was all of our little brothers. We’re grieving just like you are… like I said, we all lost someone. And if you keep this up, Aaron won’t be the only one we’ve lost. We’re going to lose you too…”

Tears were streaming down Nick’s face at this point. “Then why did you lie to me Brian? You can’t expect to just say sorry, because that one word won’t erase what happened and what I feel towards you right now. You can’t expect to do what you did, apologize and just think we can be best friends again! Sorry Brian, it doesn’t work that way! You attacked me at the hotel for crying out loud, what best friend would do that?”

“I think that’s a question you need to ask yourself!’ Brian sneered. “What best friend would attack someone who’s in the hospital, still trying to recuperate? Have you forgotten that you attacked me too? Think about it Nick… your turning this whole situation around to make you look like the victim and I the criminal. This all isn’t about you… but your sure doing a good job in making it seem that way.” He took a pause for a while, giving Nick time to wipe his tears away. “Now, I’m gonna help you with this, and like I said, after this I’m gone. Not out of this house, not out of your sight,n and definitely not out of your life. I’m gone as in I’ll never cross your path anymore, never offer you help, I won’t say another word to you. I’m done with begging for your forgiveness, and I meant it.”

Nick sighed and raised the bottom of his towel a little so he could see the wound. Brian opened the cabinet under the sink and began to rummage through it, looking for the first aid kit. As soon as he found it, he pulled it out and opened the box, staring at the contents. He pulled out a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and a gauze bandage.

“Oh hell no.” Nick said, pulling his leg away from Brian. “There is no way I’m gonna let you pour that shit on my leg.”

Brian rolled his eyes, “Stop being such a wuss Nick! You were in a bus accident for crying out loud, this should be nothing. Now, just take a deep breath in and relax.”

Nick grabbed the upper portion of his leg and had squeezed it, causing a clear, red liquid to ooze from the wound. Brian uncapped the bottle and poured the liquid over his wound, causing it to sizzle and bubble. Nick gritted his teeth together, squeezing it tighter as the burning sensation became too much for him. He began to blow on it, but Brian slapped his uninjured leg. “Don’t do that…” he warned.

Nick sighed and had looked away, trying to take his mind off the pain. Brian took a small hand towel and began to dab away the excess peroxide that was running down his leg. He grabbed the gauze bandage and placed it on the wound, taping it down on his leg. He then grabbed an ace bandage and began to wrap it tightly around his leg. Nick winced when the stinging pain was replaced with a dulling throb.

“There… done” Brian muttered, gathering the first aid contents and placing it back in the box.

Nick tried to stand up, but the ace bandage was wrapped too tightly around his leg. “Dude, I don’t know who the hell taught you first aid, but are you sure your supposed to wrap the bandage this tight?”

“It’ll eliminate the pain and reduce the bleeding… I didn’t wrap it too tight where it’ll cut your blood circulation off.”

“It sure does feel that way.” Nick muttered, turning to the side so he could grab the clothes off the counter.

Brian began to walk out of the bathroom and turned to grab the doorknob so he could close it behind him. “If you need anything else, just let me know.”

“I thought you said you were gone after this?” Nick snickered.

Brian chuckled, “Keep being a smartass…” he turned and closed the door behind him, letting his head fall back against the closed. He grinned and shook his head; this could possibly be the first step in renewing their friendship.

“How’s he doing?” AJ asked as Brian walked down the stairs.

Brian shrugged, “Better, I guess… he’s dressing himself right now, I just got done wrapping up his leg.” He paused and looked around, noticing that Kevin and Howie were nowhere in sight. “Where’s D. and Kevin”

“Howie’s in the kitchen cooking and Kevin is talking to Marcus…”

“Mmm… what’s he cooking?”

“His famous spicy enchiladas and chicken quesadilla.”

Brian could feel his stomach rumble. “Can’t wait… when do you think…” he paused in the middle of his sentence when he heard someone walking downstairs. Both he and AJ looked up to see Nick limping down, dressed in Kevin’s clothes.

“Feeling better?” AJ asked.

Nick nodded and had walked over to the couch, collapsing down on it and propping his injured leg up so it was leveled. “Much… thanks again AJ…” he froze for a moment, wanting to thank Brian, but not wanting to say the words. “And… thanks Bri… for helping me.”

Brian smiled and nodded, “No problem Frack…” he bit his tongue when he said that name, and Nick winced a bit. He hasn’t referred to Nick by his nickname since before the accident, and Nick had already made it clear that they were no longer best friends, which would mean that they couldn’t call each other the nicknames they used to call each other.

AJ could sense the tension between them and decided to break it. “Okay, who’s ready for dinner?”

~*~*~*~*~*~

They all sat at the dining table, silently staring at one another, slowly eating their food. They hadn’t eaten together like this since the accident, and once again, AJ could feel the tension that was being passed between one another. “This is really good Howie…” he said, breaking the silence.

Howie looked up at AJ and nodded, “Thanks Jay… I was kind of scared on how it would come out because I hadn’t cooked this in ages!”

They all fell silent once again, picking at their food and slowly placing it in their mouths. AJ had looked around, not liking the silence that was surrounding them. He decided to break the mode by talking about what he had remembered. “Remember the way Nick would always pull pranks onus?” the four of them looked up and just stared at AJ. He continued, “And we decided to get him back by throwing him out of the dressing room in his whitie tighties?”

All but Nick cracked a grin and snickered. “Yeah, well remember when Howie lost his balance on stage and fell into AJ, and they both fell off the stage?” Nick fired back.

Now, it was only Kevin and Brian who were snickering. “That wasn’t funny…” Howie muttered. “That really did hurt!”

Nick chuckled, “Yeah, well… I was just as hurt when you all threw me out of the dressing room in my damn whitie tighties in front of that girl band!”

“Hey Nick, didn’t you jump Howie?” AJ asked.

Nick nodded, “Yeah, and lemme tell ya, I learned the most valuable lesson in my life! Never jump a Puerto Rican… let alone make one mad!”

“I’ll kill you man… I’ll kill you!” Kevin mimicked the way Howie had threatened Nick.

Howie rolled his eyes, “Dude, I didn’t mean it… I was angry then, I said words I didn’t mean to say. But now since we’re talking about everyone’s embarrassing moments… Kevin, you still didn’t explain yourself as to why you were wearing that skirt that one day!”

“It wasn’t a skirt man… and I really think you need to talk to AJ, because he was the one who had the full on skirt, blouse and boobs!”

AJ chocked on his drink. “I had what?!?”

“Yeah man, you dressed as a chick for your Johnny-No-Name gig. It was freaking hilarious!”

AJ fell speechless, and he looked over towards Brian, who was laughing. “I really don’t know why your laughing Rok, because remember that one time we had a show, and you tripped on those stairs in front of everyone!”

This time, Brian fell silent and everyone was laughing at him. “I did not trip on those steps, Nick tripped me from behind!”

“No dude, the only thing that tripped you was your own two feet!” Nick laughed.

They were all laughing at this point, the first time they laughed so hard together in a long time. Brian glanced to the side and seen Aaron standing in the corner of the dining room, staring at all of them and smiling. He then looked over towards Brian and gave him a smile and a nod. Brian smiled and nodded as well, now knowing that everything was going to be alright.

Days passed, and the tension within the house seemed to be a little more at ease. Nick and Brian avoided crossing each other’s path, but they did talk, only when necessary. AJ’s memory was coming back full swing, slowly but surely. Howie was learning how to deal with the whole ordeal they were going through, never disconnecting from his role as the peacemaker. And Kevin, well, he was still the same Kevin they all knew and love, being the father figure of the group.

AJ was sitting on the couch next to Nick, who was watching TV. He was reading a magazine in the meantime, skimming through the pages, looking to see if there were any recent articles about his group. He didn’t care about Jessica and Nick’s divorce, he didn’t care that Green Day won the award for Best Group for the Kids Choice Awards, he really could care less about the relationship Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz were having… but what do we have here? “Looks Like The Boys Won’t Be Hitting The Streets Anytime Soon.” Was the name of the article, and below the title was a picture of them as a group, obviously a picture that was taken of them before the accident.

He read further into the article. “That was what their manager, Johnny Wright announced to MTV news earlier this month. The band was involved in a serious accident where their bus driver lost control of the vehicle after the tire of the bus had popped. The unfortunate accident claimed the life of Backstreet Boy Nick Carter’s little brother, Aaron Carter. “The boys seem to be healing quite well.” Johnny explained to MTV’s John Norris. “They’re all at home now, resting and giving their bodies and minds proper time to heal. They’re all going through a great ordeal right now, and they all appreciate the support and love their fans have been showing them throughout this whole devastating situation. They just need time to settle down and get through this obstacle, and we’re giving them all the time they need.” As of when they’ll be back on the road again, Johnny said that their new album has indeed been postponed and it looks as if they won’t be back on the road touring anytime soon. For more on this story log on to starmagazine.com or mtv.com.”

AJ closed the magazine and had placed down on the coffee table that was in front of him. Both Brian and Howie walked into the living room and had flounced down on the love seat that was situated across from the couch. “What are you guys watching?” Howie asked.

“Spongebob Squarepants.” Nick replied, never breaking his gaze off the TV. “What were you guys doing? Where’d you guys just come back from?”

“We were outside talking to the security guards…” Brian answered, staring at the TV as well. It was the episode where Sandy was hibernating and both Spongebob and Patrick were locked in her domed house where it was snowing. They were busy playing in the snow, but were trying so hard not to wake her up.

AJ’s eyes scanned the living room; he noticed that someone was missing. “Where’s Kevin?”

“He’s on the phone with Marcus…”

“Welp,” AJ sighed, placing his hands on the sofa and pushing himself up. “I gotta go drain the main vein.”

Nick grabbed the pillow from the side of him and had chucked it at AJ. “Thanks for sharing, but we really didn’t need to know that you have to drain your straw.”

Both Howie and Brian busted out in snickers while AJ glared at Nick playfully. He grabbed the pillow Nick had chucked at him earlier and began to relentlessly beat Nick on the head. “And when was the last time you saw my big dick?” AJ joked as he continued to beat Nick on the head with the pillow softly.

Nick began to laugh and tried to push AJ away, trying to shield himself from AJ’s relentless attacks. “It’s not my fault your girl came running to me, telling me how you couldn’t satisfy her.”

Without a warning, AJ pounced on Nick, playfully tackling him on the couch. Both Howie and Brian sat there laughing, not even bothering to get up to separate the two, knowing that it was only harmless horseplay. But things turned serious when Nick yelped out in pain.

AJ quickly jumped off of Nick and backed away. “Nick… are you okay?”

Both Howie and Brian rose from the love seat and approached Nick, standing behind AJ. Nick continued to sit there, rocking back and forth, squeezing his injured leg tight. “I can’t believe you AJ… why would you do that?”

“I’m, I’m sorry…” AJ began to stutter. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, I had forgot about your leg…”

Nick shook his head and looked away, “I can’t believe you… how could you fall for something LIKE THAT?!?”

AJ looked up and saw Nick smiling. Before he could make a move, Nick shot up from the couch and had lunged at AJ, playfully tackling him to the ground. They both wrestled around a bit until Nick just stopped and left AJ alone. He laid there on his back, breathing heavily. “Okay… for real this time, lets stop… my leg’s beginning to kill me!”

AJ pushed himself up off the ground. “Well, you’re the stupid one that threw yourself at me!” he extended his hand out towards Nick and had pulled him up off the ground. “Now, I’m gonna go take a piss… without any disturbances.” he stressed out the last part of his sentence, looking over towards Nick as he made his way towards the bathroom.

Nick laughed and had flounced back down on the couch behind him. He lifted his injured leg and placed it on the coffee table in front of him. “Some things never change!”

Just then, Kevin busted through the front door and ran into the parlor where they all were. “You guys, change it on channel 3.”

Brian looked back over towards his flustered cousin. “Why Kev, what’s the matter?”

“Just turn it to channel 3 now!”

Nick picked up the remote and switched the Spongebob Squarepants cartoon they were watching earlier to channel 3, as Kevin requested. It was the news, but it was the headline that caught their attention. At the top of the screen was the title “BREAKING NEWS.”

“This is just coming into our studio now, we’re getting reports that there was standoff situation that involved one male. He was a 45-year-old male by the name of Jerico Rodriguez. The standoff ended just a couple a minutes ago, the cops had no other choice than to barge into Rodriguez’s home where he barricaded himself, but when they finally busted in, he was found dead at the scene. He had shot and killed himself minutes before the swarm of SWAT invaded his home. His family and friends are mourning and grieving at this time, saying quote, “Jerico was a sweet guy that wouldn’t hurt a fly. He was a loving husband and father to his wife and two sons, and we aren’t sure as to what had ticked him off so bad as to create a standoff. Jerico rarely got mad at anything or anyone.” Jerico’s wife, Paulina Rodriguez told officials that he was once involved with a gang known as MS13, but that was years ago when he was still a freshmen in high school. He wasn’t involved in another gang since, and has only been found guilty for a few misdemeanors, which involved stealing and possession of drugs. She said that this was all in the past though, and as soon as he turned 21 and had married her, his life dramatically changed and everything seemed to be slated clean off his past. Jerico Rodriguez is also believed to be a man that was most wanted by officials. Upon investigating the scene, they found various clues that led to the belief that he was indeed the man most wanted for stalking and harming pop sensational group, the Backstreet Boys. Stay tuned for more news on this escalating story.”

They all stared at the TV in shock, slowly turning to look at one another. “Does that mean…” Nick slowly said. “it’s all over with? We can go back home and go on with our regular lives?”

Sadly, Kevin shook his head. “It doesn’t necessarily mean it’s all over. Cops still have further investigate this situation, and as for us… well, Marcus said it would be best for us to stay put here until we know for sure that this is the man they were looking for.”

“Well, is it safe for us to go back to our house at least for a little while?” Brian questioned. “I just have to check something and get something from my house and that’s it, I’ll be back.”

Kevin fell silent for a while, thinking it over. “Well, I guess it would be okay. We can all go back to our homes to get something or do whatever, but under certain circumstances. One, we all have to go one by one, so as soon as Brian comes back, the other may go. Two, we all must return to this house. And thirdly, no trying to ditch your bodyguard, NICK.” he turned and stared at Nick as she said that.

Nick’s eyes widened. “What?!? Why are you looking at me when you said that?”

Kevin chuckled and shook his head. “Just, no pulling any fast ones, okay? We all know how you can get Nick…”

“Well, I’m gonna go now… I’ll be back.” Brian said as he left and walked out the door.

Howie turned towards Kevin. “Do you honestly think that was the guy?”

Kevin looked over at Howie and sighed. “I really don’t know… I pray to God that it is though.”

Marcus pulled up to Brian’s house, parking the black SUV in his driveway. “Make it quick Littrell!”

Brian nodded and jumped out of the car, walking up to his house while fishing out his house keys. As soon as he opened his door, he left it open and rushed over towards the security keypad to type in his password so the security alarm systems would shut down for now. As soon as he punched in his password, he turned around to face his empty house. Everything was left as it should be, or at least how it was left before the accident. He looked over towards his empty couch and envisioned his wife, Leighanne sitting there, crying because of the words he said to her when he first awoke from the accident. He shook his head and began to slowly walk up the stairs.

As he slowly walked through the hallway, he came across his son’s room… little Baylee. He stopped in front of the door and just stared at it, envisioning him and Baylee playing around, laughing and smiling. Again, Brian shook the image from his head, wishing they could just live their normal lives again. He walked into his room and sat on his bed, empty bed. He placed his hand on the mattress, slowly inching it towards the other side where Leighanne normally slept. What he wouldn’t give to be with her now, in this room, lying in this bed together, holding each other.

He stood up from off the bed and walked up to his dresser, pulling the top drawer open, revealing a mass of his clothes. He began to dig through it, reaching for something that was underneath all his clothes. He pulled out a small, black velvet box. He opened it, which revealed a platinum band with three emerald cut diamonds. He brought this ring a week before their accident. Before their little “mishap”, they were headed to the next venue which was in California, not far from where they lived. As soon as they had reached the next venue, he was going to go home and grab the ring. He was going to use that free time to get on his knees and ask Leighanne if she would renew their vows. But everything changed after the accident.

He closed the small velvet box and had placed it in his pocket. This time, he’ll surprise her by going to pick her up and taking her out to a fancy restaurant. Yeah… he had it all planned out now.

AJ walked out of the bathroom and sighed, he felt better now. As he walked out into the living room, he seen Nick sitting on the couch, both he and Howie were going through a stack of envelopes, and both Brian and Kevin were nowhere to be found, they must be outside talking to the security guards. He walked over to the loveseat and flounced down, staring at both Nick and Howie who were separating the stack of envelopes.

“Here, this is for you.” Nick said as he grabbed a stack of mail and tossed it over to AJ.

AJ tried to catch it all, but it ended up scattering all over his lap and falling to the ground. “Thanks a lot Nick you dick!”

He grabbed the envelopes and looked through it. It all had his name on it, all fan mail. He opened the first envelope and read the letter. “Hey AJ. I heard what happened to you and the boys. And I just wanted you to know that all of you are in my prayers at this time, especially Aaron. I hope all of you are doing well at this time, and please don’t take too long to come back to all of us, your truly devoted fans. With sincere love, your biggest fan, Vanessa Torrie.”

“Hi AJ. My name is Beverly Frank, and I am 6 years old. My brother had told me that your mind was a vegetable, and I am really sorry.” AJ chuckled at this. “At first I didn’t know what he meant by that, until he told me that your mind was basically messed up and now your stupid.” his face turned serious. “I am sorry for that. I hope you are doing okay now, because out of the five of you, you are my favoritist Backstreet Boy. Please take care and god bless. Love, Beverly.”

AJ laughed and rolled his eyes, placing that note on the side. As he continued to open the rest of his fan mail, Kevin walked back in, stuffing his cell phone back in his pocket. “Brian didn’t come back yet?”

Both Howie and Nick shook their heads. “Nope.”

AJ looked up at Kevin in puzzlement. “Wait… what do you mean Brian didn’t come back yet? Where in the hell did he go, and how could you guys let him go… wherever he went? I thought the agreement was that we all stay here in this house until this man is captured?”

“Oh yeah, you were in the bathroom.” Nick said, grabbing the remote from off the side. “Here, check this out man.” he clicked the TV on and channel 3 came on. It was the same female reporter that had reported the breaking news earlier.

“Many meteorologist believe that this year’s hurricane season won’t be as severe as last year, Hurricane Katrina being the worst hurricane of last year and the worst devastation to hit Louisiana in decades. In other news tonight, three Americans soldiers in Iraq are reported dead after a suicide bombing went off near the car the three soldiers were in at the time.”

“Change it to channel 14.” Kevin advised.

Nick grabbed the remote again and had switched it to channel 14, where they were talking about the standoff situation that had ended not too long ago. “The family continues to mourn the lost of a loving husband and a dedicated father after a standoff situation had ended just hours ago. A 45-year-old man by the name of Jerico Rodriguez had barricaded himself in his house where he held his own self hostage while his wife and two sons were out grocery shopping. As soon as the SWAT team busted into his home, he was found shot in the head, dead at the scene. It appears that he had committed suicide minutes before the SWAT officers busted into his home. Jerico’s friends and family members describe him to be a “loving person who wouldn’t hurt a fly. It was hard to upset him, for he had no grudges with anyone and he hardly got upset at anything or anyone.” His wife stated earlier that he was indeed with a gang known as MS13, but that was years ago when he was still in high school. He gave up his minor crime life and left the gang when he entered his sophomore year, and he dramatically changed as soon as he married his high school sweetheart, Paulina Robolino. It is believe that Jerico Rodriguez was the man wanted by officials for the stalking and harassment of pop legendaries, the Backstreet Boys. We have just received some photographic images of Jerico Rodriguez from his family.” they posted various pictures of Jerico with his family, from wedding pictures, to pictures with his son, and even pictures of himself.

AJ squinted his eyes as he stared at the TV screen long and hard. “Wait Nick, try rewind this and pause on his individual picture.”

Nick did as he was told and paused it on the individual photo. AJ continued to stare at the picture, his eyes fluttering close as memories flooded his mind.

AJ looked away, looking over towards where they were serving food. As his eyes began to scan the room, one particular person had caught his eye. It was an older man sitting there in the distance, drinking coffee and staring at him. AJ continued to stare at the man, something was going off in his mind. The man continued to sip his coffee and he began to grin when he noticed that AJ was struggling to remember something he should know.

“Oh my god…” AJ rasped.

The man simply smiled, knowing AJ now knew who he was.

“What is it Jay?” Brian asked him, getting worried at AJ’s sudden odd behavior.

AJ didn’t respond. He simply pushed his mind further into remembering more about this man, he needed to remember more so that he could tell Brian that their killer was right there.

The man that he seen at the restaurant was a Caucasian man, Jerico Rodriguez was a Puerto Rican man. AJ struggled to remember what the man at the restaurant looked like, and when he was able to recall the memory fully and put two and two together… he gasped.

Nick glanced over at AJ and noticed his odd behavior. “Hey dude… what’s up? Look, if this is affecting you too much, I can shut it off you know.”

At this point, both Kevin and Howie’s attention was caught and they were staring at AJ as well.

“No…” AJ shook his head, starting to breathing hard.

Kevin glanced over at Howie and Nick in confusion. “What do you mean ‘no’?”

“Where’ Brian?” was all that he asked.

“AJ… what do you mean…”

“Where’s… Brian?” AJ asked, a little louder this time.

Kevin sighed, knowing he wasn’t going to get anywhere with AJ until he told him what he wanted to know. “Marcus took him back to his house, he’s coming back though. Why does this all matter anyway? What’s the problem Alex?”

“Call Marcus now and tell him that they both need to come back ASAP.”

Kevin was now getting frustrated at the way AJ wouldn’t just come out and tell them what the problem is. “I tried to call him earlier, but he wasn’t picking up. Look AJ, would you just please tell me what in the hell is going on?”

“That’s not the man!” AJ shouted, catching the sudden attention of all three of them.

“What do you mean that’s not the man?” Nick asked slowly, not liking the sound of this, especially the fact that Kevin had said that he had tried to call Marcus earlier but no one picked up.

“Exactly what I mean… Jerico Rodriguez isn’t the man we’re looking for… he’s innocent. Which means…”

“Our killer is still on the loose.” Howie finished AJ’s sentence off.

Marcus continued to drum his fingers on the steering wheel impatiently, wondering what was taking Brian so long. He said all he was going to do was check on a couple of things and get something from his house, and he would be up and out of there, but he was nowhere in sight. He began to slam his hand on the horn, hoping it would catch his attention and cause him to hurry up. A minute or so passed, and he still didn’t see anyone walk out through the door.

Sighing, he opened his car door and got out. As soon as he stepped out though, he felt someone come from behind and grabbed him, pulling his large and burly body back. He didn’t have time to fight back because all of a sudden he felt a sharp blade being placed on his throat and being dragged across slowly, leaving him gasping and wheezing for air. The man backed away and wiped the blood off of his knife onto his pants. Marcus struggled to remain standing, but it was getting harder and harder for him to do anything. He was losing oxygen and blood quick, which was making his brain delusional.

His knees finally buckled and he dropped to the ground, watching the man through heavy, glazed eyes make his way into Brian’s house. He covered the gaping wound in his throat, squeezing it in hopes to stop the bleeding. He tried to scream out for Brian, to warn him that the man was now entering his house, but nothing came out but a wheezing sound and a mist of blood spraying out.

As soon as the man entered the house, he looked up towards the stairs and wondered if he should go up and surprise him or if he should just wait for him to come downstairs. Coming to the realization that the didn’t have much time, he decided to make his way upstairs and surprise him. He slowly climbed the stairs, making sure not to make too much noise. But as soon as he reached the top of the stairs, he found himself standing right in front of Brian, who had just got done closing his bedroom door.

Brian found himself rooted to where he stood, not a word or sound being able to leave his throat. None of them moved for a while, but it was the man who sprung into action first and lunged himself forward. Brian immediately snapped back into reality and dodged to the side, crashing right into a long table that was in their hallway. He ended up yelping when he felt a searing pain course through the right side of his abdomen. He didn’t give himself time to recover because he began to make a mad sprint towards the staircase.

The man turned around to see where Brian was going. He too began sprinting towards the stairs and caught the back of his hair, yanking him backwards. Brian winced when he felt his hair being tugged back roughly, but turned around and punched the man right in the stomach. The man quickly hunched over but swiftly pulled his knife out of his pants and slashed it upwards towards Brian, slashing him right across the chest. That sudden and painful moment caught Brian off guard, causing him to fall backwards and tumble down the stairs. The man simply stood there as he watched Brian’s body tumble down the staircase as if he was nothing but a rag doll. It didn’t take long for his body to come to a stop at the bottom of the staircase.

The man placed the once again bloody knife in his pants and made his way downstairs, as if nothing was wrong. He began to whistle as he made his descent downwards, and as soon as he came to the bottom, he bent down towards Brian’s limp body and placed two of his fingers on the back of Brian’s neck. He had a weak pulse, but a heartbeat nonetheless. He then leaned in close towards Brian’s mouth, waiting for five seconds to see if he could hear him breathing. He heard light and quick breathing, but he was breathing nonetheless, which meant he was still alive, but would be knocked unconscious for quite some time. Satisfied, he picked up Brian’s unconscious form and had tossed him over his shoulder, making his way out of the house.

Marcus’s eyes fluttered open just in time to see the man walking out of the house, carrying Brian on his shoulder. Marcus used his free hand and had grabbed the man by his ankle, trying to prevent him from going any further with Brian. The man simply looked down at kicked Marcus roughly in the face, knocking him unconscious. He continued to make his way towards his car and had popped his trunk open. Once he opened his trunk, he stuffed Brian’s limp body in the back and had slammed the cover close. He made his way around the car and jumped into the passengers side, pulling out a small notebook from his glove compartment and flipping the cover open to the first page. He also pulled a pen out and began to tap it on his steering wheel. He had five names written down like so.

Nickolas Gene Carter
Alexander James McLean
Brian Thomas Littrell
Howard Dwyane Dorough
Kevin Scott Richardson

He clicked his pen and drew a straight line through Brian’s name. “One down, four more to go.”

Kevin slammed the phone down on the receiver. “Damnit, no one is picking up the house phone.”

He looked at Howie, AJ and Nick, staring at them in helplessness. He felt as if this was all his fault, he let his own cousin leave the house, knowing good and well that they all didn’t know if their killer was really dead or not. He looked over towards the closed door, thinking of what they should do.

“Lets go.” was all that Kevin told the three of them as he made his way towards the door and peeled it open.

They all stared at Kevin in shock, wondering what in the hell he was doing, but both Howie and AJ helped Nick off the couch and helped him to walk out of the house, following Kevin towards another black SUV that was parked in front of the house. Kevin looked around, wondering where all their supposed security guards went all of a sudden. Shrugging it off, he made his way towards the car only to find it locked.

“Shit.” he swore out loud, not knowing what he should do now.

Nick looked to the side and seen a rather large rock. “Move out of the way.” he warned as he picked up the large rock.

Kevin turned around and found Nick standing there with a rock in hand. “What the hell…” he didn’t have time to finish the question because he found himself dodging to the side as Nick chucked the rock at the window.

It shattered into a million pieces, shards of glass raining all over Kevin. He looked up at Nick in shock and shook the small pieces of glass off of him. “What in the hell did you do that for?”

“What do you care about more, this damn car or Brian?” Nick asked, not even realizing what he had said. All the anger he kept pent up within himself was slowly diminishing, and he hated the fact that he only seen that Brian was right the whole time, he only realized it now, when Brian’s life was in jeopardy.

Kevin thought over what Nick had said and realized that he was right. He reached into the shattered window and pressed the unlock button, unlocking all the doors to the SUV. Both AJ and Howie helped Nick jump into the back, while Howie took the seat in the back as well next to Nick, and AJ took the passenger side.

Kevin began to frantically pat the visors and search the small compartments, looking for a spare key that their management might keep in all the SUVs.

“Forget about it Kev…” AJ said, knowing what he was looking for. “You probably won’t find it, and we don’t have enough time.”

Kevin nodded and pulled the wires out from underneath the steering wheel, rubbing the two wires together. Seconds later, the car started and he tied to two wires together so it would keep the car on. He threw the car into reverse and pulled out of the driveway, speeding down the road towards Brian’s house. He pulled out his cell phone and flipped it open, inputting Johnny’s cell phone number.

“C’mon… pick up John.” Kevin shouted as he was going onto the fourth ring.

Finally after the sixth ring, someone answered. “Hello?”

“Johnny! Johnny man, where you at?”

“I’m at the hotel. Kevin, is this you?”

“Yeah, but you gotta listen to me. Jerico Rodriguez is not the man we’re looking for.”

The other line fell silent for a while. “What?”

“Jerico Rodriguez is not the one. We think it was a setup, our real killer being the one that killed Jerico. All we know for sure is that Jerico is not our killer.”

“And how do you know this for sure?”

“AJ told us… they showed pictures of Jerico on the news, and as soon as AJ seen it, he knew it wasn’t him. He remembered what the man looked like from the restaurant.”

Johnny released a heavy sigh, not wanting to believe what he was hearing. “Okay, well I want all of you to stay in the house, lock up and stay there, don’t go anywhere, you hear? Marcus should still be there, the rest of the security team is down here at the hotel as well, but I’m gonna be sending them back up there to the house, just stay there, all of you, okay?”

“Well, you see that’s the problem. Marcus took Brian back to his house to pick up something after you told me to put it on the news. I told them all that we could go back to our house and pick up whatever we needed, as long as we came back.”

“You did what?!?” Johnny shouted.

Kevin pulled the cell phone away from his ear. “Look, I know it was a stupid move on my part, but I didn’t even know that Jerico was innocent. AJ wasn’t with us at the time we first saw the news, and Brian and Marcus was already gone by the time AJ saw the news and told us that Jerico wasn’t guilty. Look, we’re on our way to Brian’s house right now, so I need you to send backup to his house. I tried to call Marcus, he didn’t answer. I even called Brian’s house phone, and no one answered. You can yell at me later when we get back, all I know is that I’m on my way to get my cousin back.” and with that, he hung the phone up and placed it on the side.

As soon as he pulled up the house, AJ was the first to jump out of the car, seeing Marcus on the ground. He quickly made his way towards Marcus and found himself skidding to a stop, turning away from the gruesome sight. He began to hyperventilate, tears spewing out of his eyes as he realized that one of his best friends, his security guard was now dead.

“Oh god…” Kevin gasped as he pulled AJ away from Marcus’s limp body, knowing AJ was freaking out.

Howie approached AJ and pulled him away from Kevin, holding AJ’s trembling form. Kevin knelt down towards Marcus and placed two fingers on his neck, checking his carotid. He released a sigh when he felt a very weak pulse. He brought his ear down towards Marcus’s nose and heard hush breathing escaping every once in a while.

“He’s still alive.” Kevin informed them.

Both Howie and AJ turned towards Kevin, not believing that Marcus would still be alive after being slashed across the throat. Nick looked up towards the house and seen that the front door was wide open. He walked past all of them and up to the house, walking through the open door.

“Brian!” Nick shouted, his heartbeat pounding harder and faster with every second that passed by.

He wandered through the living room, seeing no one in sight. He walked through the kitchen and came up with the same results, no one was around. He finally came to the staircase and gasped, seeing a small puddle of blood on the floor.

“God… Kevin!” he shouted, causing Kevin, Howie and AJ to run over towards where he was standing.

Kevin could only stare down at the blood, praying to god that it didn’t belong to his younger cousin. He made his way up the stairs, stopping every once in a while to see light splatters of blood on the wall and steps. Once he reached the top of the stairs, he walked through the hallway, towards Brian’s bedroom. He peeled the door open, only to find no one in side.

Tears began to fall from his eyes, now knowing good and well that it was all his fault that his cousin was now gone, in the hands of a madman. AJ came to a stop behind Kevin, wondering why Kevin was just standing in the door of Brian’s room.

“Kevin.” AJ softly called out, worried about Kevin’s sudden odd behavior.

Without warning, Kevin slammed his fist into the wall next to the bedroom door, his large, curled fist going straight through the plastered wall. He continued to punch it, dismissing the fact that he would soon crack the bones of his knuckles. AJ snapped out of his daze and grabbed Kevin’s flying fist, pulling it back, preventing him from punching the wall again and causing himself even more pain.

Kevin pushed AJ away from him and made his way back downstairs, breezing past Howie and Nick who were left standing there, staring at him dumbfounded. Howie ran out of the house as well, following Kevin and wondering where he was going.

“Kevin, what in the hell are you doing?” Howie asked.

“Stay here…” was all that he said. “All of you. Wait here for Johnny them to get here. Call paramedics for Marcus.” he said as he jumped into Marcus’s SUV instead.

“And where do you think your going?” Howie questioned, not liking the way Kevin was acting now.

Kevin opened the glove compartment and pulled out a small handgun Marcus always kept on him. “I’m going to get Brian back.” He said as he cocked the gun. “I shouldn’t have let him go, but I did, and now… now I’m going to get him back.” he said as he started the car and pulled out of the driveway, speeding down the road and out of sight.

Howie could only stand there in helplessness, not believing what was going on right now. He couldn’t believe that he just allowed Kevin to leave off to god knows where by himself.

Johnny just sat there, his hands clasped tightly together. Both AJ and Nick were sitting on the couch, not saying a word but their eyes displayed a sense of nervousness. Howie was busy pacing back and forth, stopping to check his watch every once in a while.

All of their heads snapped up when they heard someone open the door, but their faces soon fell when they realized that it was only Vince, Nick’s bodyguard.

“Anything?” Johnny asked.

Vince shook his head and closed the door. “Nothing… they said it’ll take a while for the satellites to pick up his exact location, but they’ll be sure to call and let us know as soon as they discover his whereabouts.”

Johnny shook his head and scoffed, “I can’t believe this… what in the hell am I supposed to tell the public once this leaks out? We have one missing Backstreet Boy, but its okay because his cousin is out there on his own, searching for him.”

“For Christ sakes Johnny, would you shut the hell up?!?” Nick shouted, causing everyone to stare at him in complete and utter shock. “When will you understand that this isn’t about you? You’re sitting here more worried about your image and what you’ll say to the public once they find out that Brian is missing.”

They all fell silent when they heard someone at the front door again. Kevin walked through and tossed the keys to the side. He looked up and stared at Johnny, not saying one word. “Here you go.” He said as he chucked the small hand gun he had in his possession at him.

Johnny caught the gun and stared at it and Kevin as if he had completely lost it. “Have you lost your damn mind? What in the hell were you thinking, prowling the streets by yourself, looking like a goddamn maniac with a freaking gun!”

Kevin didn’t reply. He simply flounced down on the love seat and began to massage his temples, trying to ward off the migraine he was having at that moment.

“That’s it!” Johnny shouted all of a sudden, causing the four of them to look up at him. “You’re all on house arrest!”

“Yeah, what a great fucking plan!” Kevin shouted, rising from the love seat, overshadowing Johnny and intimidating him. “Lets all sit here and wait for this fucking maniac to come and get us. Better yet, let me sit here and wait to hear that they have found my cousin’s dead body!”

“Shut it Richardson!” Johnny warned, pointing his finger in emphasis.

“No, you fucking shut it John!” Kevin fired back, “I’ve had enough of your bullshit. You don’t care about us, you never did. All you cared about was the precious image you were establishing for us which is rolling in big bucks for you. And you’re willing to jump at whatever lengths to make sure that your products aren’t harmed in anyway, and it’s not for our wellbeing, it’s for yours! Well, you know what, I quit!”

“Stop being ridiculous Kevin.” Johnny sighed. “Do you even know what you’re saying right now? I know it’s hard to sit back, knowing that Brian is in the hands of a killer, but don’t take your frustrations out on me. How dare you accuse me of not caring for the group’s wellbeing, I have been nothing but a founding father to you all, and this is the respect I get in the end?”

“How many times do I have to say that this all isn’t about you?” Nick shouted, coming to Kevin’s defense. “We’re the ones on the run… our lives were put in danger, that fucking guy took my youngest and only brother away from me… there’s no way in hell I’m letting this guy leave our lives incomplete.”

Vince walked into the living room, bringing his cell phone away from his ear. “I just got a call from Eric, he’s at the hospital right now and Marcus is conscious.”

Johnny just stared at Vince, but then turned to look at the four of them. “Vince, I want you to stay here and keep a watch on all of them… till I get back.” and with that, he turned and walked out of the house.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Johnny walked into the hospital room, Eric walking away from Marcus’s bed and walking towards him. “How is he?”

Eric turned back to look at Marcus, who was lying in his bed, immobile. “He seems to be doing quite well right now, and the doctors say his healing process will be slow, but he will progress nonetheless.”

“Did he say anything since he woke up? Can he remember anything?”

Eric shrugged, “He didn’t say much when he woke up, all he asked was where Brian was.”

Johnny turned to look away, sighing in frustration. “I want you to stay with him, and when he starts to come around, I want you to ask as much questions you can, we need to understand what happened.”

He turned and began to walk out of the room, but stopped and turned to face Eric once more. “Oh yeah, and Eric?”

“Yes sir?”

“When he comes around… do me a favor and let him know that he’s fired.”

Before Eric could protest, Johnny left the room.

He awoke to the feeling of cool liquid being splashed on his face, causing his eyes to flutter open. He looked around, disoriented at first, but giving his eyes time to adjust to the darkness that was surrounding him.

He looked up and found himself staring face to face with the man that had caused them so much emotional and physical pain. “Why hello beautiful.” the man scoffed. “Hope you had a good sleep, because now your gonna help me find your friends.”

Brian winced when he felt the water that was splashed on his face earlier trickle down his chest, over the long gash that was now scabbing. The man reached into the back of the trunk and grabbed Brian by the collar of his shirt, roughly yanking him out of the trunk and tossing his body to the ground as if he was nothing but a rag doll.

Brian gritted his teeth together when he felt his elbows crash into the rock, hard pavement. The man didn’t give Brian time to recuperate because he pulled him up from the ground by his hair, dragging him towards the front of the car.

“Do you know where we are?” the man asked as he shoved Brian into the side of the car.

Brian looked up, not aware at first as to where they were. “No…”

“Wrong answer!” the man shouted as he slammed his fist into Brian’s midsection.

Brian gasped and collapsed to his knees, desperately clutching at his stomach, which was now doing summersaults within him. The man laughed as he pulled out a pack of cigarettes and shook a nicotine stick out, placing it in his mouth and lighting it with his lighter. “Why don’t you take a closer look?” he said as he grabbed the back of Brian’s head and forced him to look up.

Brian continued to squint at what the man was forcing him to stare at. He gasped when he realized that he did know where they were.

“Does this place look familiar?” the man asked, taking a long drag of his cigarette and letting out a puff of smoke.

Brian quickly began to shake his head. “No… I’ve never seen this place before!”

That answer only landed him another blow in the abdomen, causing him to completely buckle over and gasp for air. The man shook the hand he punched Brian in the stomach with while he used his other hand to place his cigarette back in his mouth. “You know, we can do this all night… it’s completely up to you. I honestly don’t have a problem with standing here, beating the living shit outta you.” he ended his sentence with swiftly kicking Brian in his side. “But you, on the other hand, will have a problem. Now, you have two options here, and we can do this the easy way, or the hard way. Option number one, you can tell me where the rest of your little friends are. Option number two, I can walk right into this house, dragging you behind me, and I will not hesitate to shoot your mother, father, brother, wife and son right in front of you. The choice is completely up to you.”

Brian spat out the saliva he felt collecting in the back of his throat. “And what makes you think I’m going to tell you what you need to know?”

“Well, seeing that your more of a family man, I made a proposal in which I thought you would easily choose your family over anything, but we can do things this way if you insist.” he pulled out a gun from his pants and cocked it. “I thought it would be more fun and interesting this way anyway. So, who should I take out first, your gorgeous mom or sexy wife?”

“Leave them out of this!” Brian sneered, “I’ll… I’ll tell you what you need to know, under one circumstance though… tell me, why are you doing this to us?”

“Since when in the hell did I appoint you to be a goddamn negotiator?” the man snapped, taking another long drag of his cigarette and flicking it out off to the side. “This isn’t a fucking win/win situation, and the sooner you realize this, the better off you’ll be. Now, you either tell me where the hell the rest of your friends are, or you’ll be attending your fucking family’s funeral. Maybe then you’ll realize the pain Nick went through.”

Brian glared up at the man and scrambled up from the ground, tackling him by his midsection. They both struggled for a while, until the man finally got the upper hand of the situation. He used his gun and pistol whipped Brian across the face, causing him to fall backwards. “Okay, I’m really getting tired of this. You’ve got five seconds to tell me what I want to know… five… four… three…” he cocked his gun and began to walk towards the house. “two… one…”

“Okay, okay, okay!” Brian shouted, tears streaming down his face. “We’re all staying at a house.”

The man smiled and brought his gun down to his side. “Alright, now we’re getting somewhere, but I could’ve guessed that you were all staying at one particular house, due to the fact that none of ya’ll are at your own houses and you guys set me up!” he held up his arm that was injured before. “Now, I’m not gonna ask you anymore questions, because I’m getting tired of your stupid sarcastic remarks. We’re going to get back into this car here and your gonna direct me how to get to the house. Now, lets go.”

“Yes sir, everything is secure.” Vince reported as he pulled back the curtains, checking the area outside.

“Okay, I need you to stay there because I won’t be sending Eric back to the house, he’s gonna be staying at the hospital with Marcus. As for me, I’m going back to the hotel, we have a meeting with management and FBI. Just… whatever you do, do not take your eyes off of them for even a second… we really don’t need another one of them missing.”

“You’ve got it sir.” Vince said as he hung up his cell phone and stuffed back in his pocket. He turned and walked back into the parlor, where they were all sitting there, watching TV.

“How’s Marcus?” AJ asked.

Vince looked down at him and sighed. “He’s doing better than I expected… he’s expected to make a full but slow recovery… Eric will be…” he stopped in the middle of his sentence, the sound of something heavy crashing catching all of their attentions.

Kevin rose from the couch, but Vince waved him off, signaling for him to sit back down. He pulled out his gun from the back of his pants and began to make his way to the door. They all remained sitting on the couch, staring at the door, waiting for Vince to come back. Vince came back, no gun in hand, but Brian was right behind him, following him into the house.

“God, Brian…” Kevin exclaimed as he sprung up from the couch, making his way towards his cousin, but he stopped himself when another male entered the room, following Vince and Brian, the only difference is that this man had a gun aimed at Brian’s back.

“Well, well, well… isn’t this interesting?” the man asked, taking his gun away from Brian’s back and aiming it at the rest of them. “Didn’t think I’d find you all here, right now, like this…”

All of a sudden, he turned towards Vince and fired his gun, shooting him right in the chest. The five of them jumped at the loud sound of the bullet being released from the gun’s chamber, and could only stand and stare in shock as they watched Vince immediately crumbled to the ground, a big red spot on his chest growing larger and larger.

He turned back towards the rest of them and rose his gun again. “We’re all gonna walk out of this house as if nothing happened and go into my car. We’re going to take a little ride. Now move!”

Brian was the first one to start walking out of the house, followed by Kevin, Howie and AJ. Nick only stood there and glared at the man, as if almost forgetting that he had a gun in his possession. The man looked over towards Nick when he realized that only four men passed his way.

He cocked his gun and aimed it at Nick. “I suggest you get your ass into gear and follow your friends.”

Nick only continued to glare at the man, the very one who took his only little brother away from him. He passed him by, never breaking his stare on him until he was out the door, standing behind AJ. The man walked out of the house and approached the car.

“Get in.” he demanded.

When no one moved, he reached out for the person that was closest to him, which happened to be Nick. He grabbed him by the back of his neck and yanked him over towards the car, opening the passenger side and shoving him in the car. As soon as he got him in, he slammed the door closed and opened the other back door.

“Get in the fucking car!” he exclaimed, using his gun to emphasize his point.

Hesitantly, they all squished into the back of the car, staying silent as they watched the man slam the door shut and jump into the driver’s side of the car. He threw the car into reverse and peeled out of the driveway, speeding down the road.

“Where are you taking us?” Kevin asked

The man glanced up in the rearview mirror and grinned. “You’ll see soon enough…”

Nick looked down at his leg and had grabbed it, squeezing it in hopes to relieve the dull pain. He looked over at the man that was holding them captive and just glared. There he was, sitting beside the very man who took the life of his younger brother. He noticed that his gun was in his pants. Right there and then anger took over, causing him not to think properly. He took this opportunity to strike. He grabbed the man’s arms and pulled it away from the wheel, causing the SUV to skid off the road.

The man didn’t have time to think because before he knew it, Nick’s fist flew into his face. He tried to push Nick away, but the uncontrolled car which was swerving all over the road wasn’t helping any. All of a sudden the large SUV slammed into a wall, causing all of them to viciously jerk forward. Even though he felt a strain in his neck, that didn’t stop him from going after the man, he continued to punch him in his face. The man reached behind him and had opened the car door, causing both him and Nick to fall out. Nick fell on top of him and continued to beat the living shit out of him, the same way he had done to him when the accident occurred.

Kevin, Howie, Brian and AJ had jumped out of the car, not knowing what to do. They knew that if they stopped Nick, the man would take that to his advantage and get the upper hand in things, but they also knew that Nick couldn’t hold him off by himself for long. Kevin soon jumped in and tried his best to help Nick subdue the man. AJ, Brian and Howie could only stand there helplessly, unsure of what they could do.

The man was finally able to grab his gun out of his pants. He kicked his legs out, which came into contact with Kevin’s head and caused him to falter back. He roughly grabbed Nick by the hair and held his gun underneath his chin, fingering the trigger.

“One more move and I’ll blow his fucking brains out.” he warned.

Brian was on the ground nursing Kevin while AJ and Howie just stood there. The man turned his attention back to Nick, “I will not hesitate to kill you like I did with your fucking brother.”

“You fucking bitch!” Nick screamed as he tried to turn around to grab the man, but he only tugged harder on his hair.

“Keep moving and I will pull this trigger, don’t think I won’t.:”

He pulled Nick up off the ground, all the while keeping the gun placed beneath his chin. “I’ve had it with you, get your ass in the fucking car, in the back asshole.”

When Nick refused to move, the man cocked his gun and aimed it at Brian. “I said get… in… the fucking… car.”

“Go ahead.” Nick sneered. “Shoot him, I don’t give a fuck.”

Brian’s eyes widened as Kevin tried to pull him down behind him.

The man only snickered. “You want me… to shoot your best friend?”

“He’s not my best friend, I don’t give a fuck about him. Shoot them all for all I care.”

He stood there, his gun never leaving Brian. He released a maniacal laugh, “You’re fucked up, you know that?”

He diverted his attention to Brian once again and fingered the trigger. Nick took that as an opportunity and ran to tackle him. The man suddenly turned around and aimed the gun at Nick this time, “And you must be fucking crazy to think that I didn’t catch on to what you were trying to do. Trying to make me divert my attention to them so you could do something. Clever, I’ll give you that much Carter. Now, get in the fucking car or I’ll pull the trigger on you. You guys are wasting my fucking time.”

Nick glared at him, but soon did as he was told. The man walked up to Kevin and pushed Brian away, “Get up.” he spat as he grabbed Kevin by the collar of his shirt and pulled him up from the ground.

“I want you three in the back, and you…” he grabbed AJ and pulled him close to him, placing the gun into his temple. “You’re riding shotgun with me.”

AJ didn’t even bother to fight back. He watched as Brian, Kevin and Howie got into the back of the car once more, and was startled when the man suddenly pushed him towards the car. “Get moving.”

AJ jumped into the front of the car and watched as the man walked around to get into the driver’s side. He turned around to face them and had placed the gun to AJ’s head again. “And if any of you guys wanna go and play hero again, I’ll kill him. Got it?” when he didn’t get any responses, he turned back around and started the car, pulling away from the wall they had crashed into.

Things were silent for a while, the only sound being audible was the weird sounds that the car was emitting. The man looked up into the rearview mirror, seeing that both Kevin and Nick were asleep while Howie and Brian were looking off into the windows.

“So, Alexander…” he finally broke the silence. “How’s your head? I um… heard you had amnesia or something.”

AJ glanced over at him but gave him no response.

“Do you remember anything at all?” he asked again.

“You know damn well what you did to me,” AJ finally replied. “What you did to all of us.”

The man looked over at AJ and just stared. He released a “humph” sound, “I’m sorry to hear that AJ… it’s a real shame that you don’t remember much. I mean, doesn’t it suck so bad when you’re trying so hard to remember something and yet nothing comes to mind? It’s stuck there on the tip of your tongue and you’re trying so hard to spit it out, but there’s nothing. Do you know how crucial memory is in life?”

“Does it look like I really give a shit about what you have to say?” AJ snapped, angered at the fact that he was trying to hold a conversation as if he was his best friend.

“Memory is so important to humans, it’s a natural ability to retain information and knowledge of past events. It’s so easy to create, but haven’t you notice how easy it is to take it away? Then, what are you left with? With no memory, there’s this gap in your life because you have nothing to grasp onto. Do you get what I’m saying AJ?”

“I really could care less.”

“You should care. Think hard Alex, it’ll all come to you.” he reached down below his seat and was searching for something, all the while driving. AJ suddenly became uneasy, unsure if he was reaching for a weapon. Finally the man found what he was looking for and pulled it out from beneath his seat. “Between you and I, here you go.”

He handed AJ a hardcover book. “What the hell am I suppose to do with this?”

“Take a look at it.”

AJ grabbed the book and slowly opened it; it was a journal but he was unsure of who it belonged to.

“ Turn it to the last page.”

AJ did as he said and flipped it to the last page, reading it’s contents. His eyes began to widen as he continued to read the book the man had give him.

The man looked over at AJ and smiled, “You see Alexander? Do you now understand how important memories are? A simple memory could save a life.”

AJ looked up from the book, eyes wide and mouth agape.

The man chuckled, “Shh… between you and I, remember?”

“Ah, here we are.” the man said as he parked the car.

AJ squinted, trying to see where they were through the darkness but couldn’t see anything. He turned to see that both Kevin and Nick were still asleep while Brian and Howie were looking out the windows, trying to determine where they were as well.

“Rise and shine pretty boys.” the man exclaimed in a cherry tone, causing both Kevin and Nick to awake in hell once again.

“Where the hell are we?” AJ asked.

The man took his gun out, “You’ll find out. Now, we’re all gonna get out of this car and you’re gonna follow me. Don’t even think about running away because I will not hesitate to shoot him.” he aimed his gun at AJ when he said that. “Do I make myself clear?” no one responded. “It’s really dark out, but if you guys follow me there should be no problem, now lets go.”

They all got out of the car and just stood there. The man walked around and grabbed AJ, “C’mon sweetheart. Everybody else follow close behind.”

Hesitantly, they followed the man who held AJ at gunpoint, letting him lead them into darkness. Everything was silent, the only thing being heard was their footsteps crunching on dead leaves and twigs. After a few minutes, the man finally came to a stop, bringing AJ to a halt as well.

“Stop.” he told them as he reached behind a large looking rock and had pulled something out. “Nick, do you know where we are?”

“If you haven’t notice, none of us can see a damn thing out here because it’s fucking dark. So, I’m gonna go on and say no… I don’t know where the hell we are.”

A sudden light illuminated the area, causing the five of them to squint and look away from the piercing light. when they turned back they seen the man there holding a lantern, but it didn’t take long for them to realize where the were.

“You son of a bitch!” Nick screamed as he began to approach the man.

He simply took out his gun and aimed it at Nick. “Back down Carter.”

“Why the fuck did you bring us here?” Nick bellowed, glancing down at his brother’s grave.

“Nickolas, I’m offering you a chance of a lifetime. I’m offering you redemption. I can’t imagine how it feels to lose the one you love, and I can’t imagine how great it’d feel to finally bring the guilty to justice.” he handed his gun to Nick. “A life for a life…”

Nick just stared at the man, anger and resentment dancing in his eyes. When Nick didn’t move to take the gun, he turned and aimed it at the remaining four. “The rest of you, get on your fucking knees now.”

The four did as they were told, going down on their knees before Aaron’s grave. The man turned his attention once more to Nick. “C’mon Nick, take it. A life for a life. You‘re finally bringing someone to justice for the death of your younger brother, why are you hesitating?”

Nick finally grabbed the gun, his hand shaking the whole time.

“C’mon, take your pick Nick.” he walked over to Kevin and roughly grabbed him by his hair. “Will it be Kevin, the one who always tried to pass off Aaron’s death as if it was nothing?” he walked over to Howie. “Or will it be Howie, the one who was unsure if he should tell you about Aaron’s death or not.” next, he sauntered over to AJ. “How about AJ? The one who can’t remember shit and could be holding a vital piece of information that could change everything.” finally, he walked over to Brian and just looked down at him and smiled. “Get up.” he said as he grabbed Brian by the back of his shirt and hauled him up off the ground. “What about Brian? The very one who didn’t say anything to you Nick. He knew the whole time that Aaron was dead, and yet he left you hanging, he let you believe that Aaron was still alive. I see the hatred in your eyes, ever since you found out about Aaron’s death and the way your best friend didn’t tell you anything, I could tell that you wanted to rid the world of Brian, there’s no denying it because I would feel the same way.”

At this point, Nick was in tears, the mind games that the man was playing was wearing him down mentally.

“Who will it be Nick? Brian lied to you, your best friend lied to you, he let you believe that Aaron was alive, he let you hold on to that little hope you had left, that little amount of false hope that shrouded your heart. What are you going to do about it Nick? Bring him to justice!”

Nick’s arm rose a bit, the gun not taking a particular aim.

“Nick, if you don’t pick someone soon, I’ll choose someone and do it myself.”

AJ glanced back and forth between the man and Nick. Even though Nick didn’t have a particular aim, he could tell that he wanted to raise his gun at Brian, what the man was telling him wasn’t helping any.

“Nick!” AJ shouted. “Nick, don’t do this…”

Nick looked over at AJ for a while, but then looked back at Brian, who had tears in his eyes.

“Nick!” AJ tried once more to catch his attention. “You can’t do this, don’t listen to him. There’s something you gotta know…”

“Shut the fuck up AJ!” the man yelled, knowing good and well that he was going to reveal the little “secret” they had between them. “Time’s running out Nick, I will choose someone for you.”

“Nick, listen to me… this guy…” AJ tried to say, but the man interrupted him once more.

“AJ, this is the last time I’m telling you, shut the fuck up!” he screamed. “Now Nick,” he grabbed Nick’s hand and brought it over to Brian, placing it on his temple. “A life for a fucking life… put an end to all this right now, bring him to justice.”

“Nick, don’t you do this… there’s no reason for you to do this because…” AJ stopped himself when he saw the man making his way towards him.

“Didn’t I tell you to shut the fuck up?” he bellowed as he backhanded AJ, knocking him off his knees.

Everything froze when the sound of a cocked gun filled the air.

“You’re offering me redemption, and I’m taking it.”

The man smiled, expecting to see Nick preparing to pull the trigger on Brian, but instead he found the gun’s aim on him.

“I choose you.” Nick said, his hand now steady and his eyes gleaming with anger and revenge. “You are the sick fuck who took my brother away from me, not them. You are the one who did this to us, and you’re right… it feels great to be staring into the eyes of the guilty and finally bring him to justice.”

The man rose his hands into the air, “You got me… but, there’s something I haven’t been completely honest about. You see, you think I’m the only one that’s after you guys… you have it all wrong! Do you honestly think I would have gotten this far if it wasn’t for the help of certain people? I have a shitload of people that work for me Nick, and killing me will only trigger these people to kill you, and they will not hesitate. If I’m dead, you’re all dead, got me?”

“How do I know you’re not fucking bluffing?”

“Think about it Nick… I had this all planned out for quite some time and I knew I couldn’t carry out this task myself. I have people everywhere, from the FBI to the coroners, and they do whatever I fucking tell them to do. I’m a man of money, more money than you fucks, and sad to say these people want the money badly. They don’t give a shit about you, they could fucking care less. In their eyes, you guys are nothing but a bunch of spoiled fucking brats who are worth a shitload to some, but you are worth nothing to me or them. So, ask yourself this question Nick, if you guys are worth nothing to me, then why couldn’t I have killed you guys off a long time ago? Believe me, I wanted to, but I wanted to show you my grand finale, the final act before I draw the curtains close.”

“Correction, this is my final act now and I’m gonna show you the fucking grand finale. Take a bow motherfucker, before I draw the curtains close.”

Before anyone had time to react, the man pulled out another gun and aimed it at AJ. “Here’s my final bow.” he said before he pulled the trigger.

AJ’s eyes widened as he felt a burst of pain explode through him. Everyone fell silent, all eyes were on him. He looked down and seen a spot of blood on his stomach, growing larger and larger by the second. All of a sudden he felt everything closing in on him, leaving him little to no space to breathe or react. His hand went to his stomach, trying to cover the wound and stop the bleeding, but there was nothing he could do. Time was slowing down for him, everything was coming in and out in a blur, he was growing weak by the second.

“YOU FUCKER!” Nick screamed as he fired his gun at the man, shooting him right in the chest.

The man gasped when he felt the bullet enter his chest. He dropped to his knees, gun still in hand, and finally dropped to the ground, taking in deep, shallow breaths. The four of them crowded around AJ, who now had blood trickling down the side of his mouth.

“Alex… Alex, look at me man.” Nick said as he grabbed AJ’s head and placed it on his lap, gently caressing his face. “Look at me buddy, stay with me okay?” he paused and looked around, they were in the middle of a cemetery. “Someone’s gotta look for help, someone go call for help now.”

Brian finally sprung into action, running to the car to look for a cell phone, but there was nothing.

“What the hell is going on out here?” a voice asked.

Brian turned towards the voice and seen the cemetery’s security guard approach him in a golf cart.

“Sir, you gotta help me. My friend’s been shot and he’s bleeding bad, we need you to radio in help please.” Brian cried.

“Okay, I need you to calm down sir, everything will be alright.” he grabbed his walkie talkie. “I need paramedics and police stat down at the cemetery, there’s been a shooting incident with one man down, I repeat, one man down.”

“10-4, how many people were involved.” the security guard looked over at Brian, waiting for an answer.

“Six…” Brian finally replied. “Tell her that we’re the Backstreet Boys and Alexander James McLean is the man down.”

“Well, I’ll be damned.” the security guard muttered. “These are the Backstreet Boys ma’am, they have been found. The one man down is Alexander James McLean.”

“Please tell us the condition of the situation sir.”

Brian turned and walked away from the security guard who was explaining the situation. As he began to walk back over towards the guys, tears streamed down his face as reality began to sink in, everything was set into slow motion. Nick still had AJ’s head on his lap, wiping away the blood that was now drying on the side of his face. Kevin was ripping off a piece of shirt and holding it down on the wound while Howie just sat there, helplessly crying at the state of his best friend.

As Brian’s watery eyes continued to wander, he looked down at the man who had caused them all so much grief and pain and his heart stopped. The man was still alive, he had one hand over his bloody chest and his other hand was aiming his gun at Nick’s back, preparing to shoot.

Brian charged at the guy, about to kick the gun out of his hand, but was thrown forward as he felt something hard knock into the back of his shoulder. The sound of a gun going off exploded within his ears, and he dropped to the ground. He tried hard to stay conscious, but darkness was slowly engulfing him. He heard more gun shots and was unsure of exactly who it shot. He was confused as to who shot him from behind and all he could hear no was shots ringing out left and right, followed by the screams of his brothers.

“I want to share a room with Brian!” Nick cried, upset at the fact that he had to share a room with AJ.

“You make like I’m thrilled to be sharing a room with your dumbass! Shutup cry baby!” AJ retaliated.

“Alex, cut it out.” Kevin warned, not liking the way AJ always picked on Nick. “Nick, we’re only here for night, can you please just cooperate with us just once?”

“AJ’s mean to me! He doesn’t let me do anything.”

“AJ’s mean to me, he doesn’t let me do anything!” AJ mocked. “You sound ridiculous Nick, you know that? When will you ever just grow up?”

“I’ll grow up the day you stop being an ass…” the last part of Nick’s sentence was muffled out when Brian placed a hand over his mouth.

“Nick, don’t say that. What did your mother say about saying bad words?”

“Brian, I don’t want to share a room with him, I want to share one with you.”

Brian smiled and ruffled Nick’s blonde hair. “Don’t worry kiddo, it’s just for one night. If he acts mean to you, just call me and I’ll be there.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. All you gotta do is call on me and I’ll be there Nick, no matter what.”

~*~*~*~

“Why are you always so mean to me?” an 16-year-old Nick questioned.

AJ rolled his eyes, “I’m not mean to you, you just pout about every single little thing.”

“You know that’s not true. You are mean to me AJ, what have I ever done to you?”

“C’mon Nick, stop being such a cry baby.”

“I’m not being a cry baby. I’m tired of the way you always dis me. Just face it AJ, you’re jealous of me.”

“What could I possibly be jealous about when it comes to you?”

“I don’t know, but you do have a lot of things you could be jealous about. Since I’m the youngest of the group I get more attention, maybe because I get more singing parts then you or practically everybody views me to be the most cutest, popular Backstreet Boy. I see the way you glare at me when I’m with Kevin, maybe you’re jealous because he shows me more attention than he shows you. I would understand that though because he is the father figure of the group and I know you view him to be like a father model in your life. I’d be jealous too if I felt that way about him and he showed me little to no attention.”

Nick was cut off when he felt AJ’s hand snake around his throat and he was being pushed into the wall behind them. “Shutup Nick…” AJ growled.

Tears sprung to Nick’s eyes, surprised that AJ would ever lay a hand on him, but he should have known better because he struck a cord in AJ’s life, his father. AJ continued to glare at him, but his glare softened when he realized what he was doing and he removed his hand from his throat.

Nick just stood there against the wall, tears streaming down his face, still in shock. AJ sat down on the edge of the bed and buried his face into his hands, letting out all his emotions.

“Nick, I’m sorry... You’re right.” he cried. “I’m jealous of you because you have something I’ve always wanted. I’m jealous of the friendship you and Brian share, I’ve always wanted that.”

“What about Howie? He’s your best friend.”

“Things change over time Nick… he was my best friend, and he always will be, but I’ve always wanted a consistent friendship like the one you and Brian share. You guys have nicknames for each other for crying out loud. I just feel like the outcast of the group.”

Everything melted away from Nick, from their dispute to what AJ did to him earlier. He walked over to AJ and sat down on the edge of the bed next to him. He embraced him in a hug and pulled the older man close to him, allowing him to cry on his shoulders. “You should never feel like an outcast AJ… you never were one. And I’m sorry for what I said earlier, I had no right to even say that. But you have nothing to be jealous of Jay, me and Brian may be close and all, but you guys are all my best friends, we all share a special friendship that tops the Frick and Frack friendship any day!”

AJ glanced up at the young blonde and smiled through his tears. “Thanks Nick.”

“To tell you the truth, I’m jealous of you AJ…”

AJ looked up at Nick and he nodded, “I’ve been jealous of you since day one. I mean, you have one hell of a voice and a sex appeal that drive all the girls crazy, I just have these cute baby looks that make them scream. But besides the jealousy, I’ve always looked up to you. Me and Brian may be close, but you and I are on a whole ‘nother level because we’re only two years apart... the rest of them are ancient compared to us.” they both laughed. “You were truly the first older brother in my life that I’ve never had.”

AJ smiled and wiped away the tears that were now falling carelessly. “Okay, enough of this mushy stuff.”

They both rose off the bed and just stared at each other. Nick smiled and grabbed AJ into a tight hug. “I love you AJ… always and forever.”

“I love you too Nick.”

~*~*~*~*~

“AJ, open this damn door, c’mon now!”

AJ lifted his head to the sound of Kevin’s angry voice and the constant banging. He closed his eyes and shoved his head deep into his pillow again, he didn’t want to put up with their shit right now.

“He’s obviously not gonna open the door Kevin, and having you just knock on the door isn’t going to open it either.” Nick remarked.

“Did someone try to call his cell phone? Maybe he’s not even in here.” that was Brian this time.

“Oh no, he’s in here. And I did try to call his cell phone, he ain’t answering it. AJ, open this goddamn door!!” Kevin shouted again.

AJ squeezed his eyes shut, the constant banging wasn’t helping his headache. He had went out last night and drank by himself, completely forgetting that he and the fellas were scheduled to perform at a little league baseball game the next day. Since he didn’t show up, Kevin, Brian and Nick decided to hunt him down and see what the problem was, even though Kevin knew good and well why he didn’t show up.

“AJ, I swear to God, if you don’t open this door I will break it down, don’t think I won’t.”

AJ rolled his eyes, knowing good and well Kevin wouldn’t do something like that. He just wanted to get up and open the door so they would shut up and leave him alone, and that’s when he realized that he couldn’t. It took a lot of power for him to just lift his head up from the pillow, and he felt like throwing up everything inside him.

He let his head fall back down on the pillow, giving up. He waited for the routine of Kevin pounding, then the yelling, then Nick telling him some sarcastic remark, and finally Brian trying to negotiate, but none of that came. AJ sighed in relief, truly thinking that they just decided to leave him alone.

His eyes snapped open when he heard a loud crash and seen Kevin, Brian and Nick walk into his room.

“Alex, what in the hell are you doing?” Kevin fumed.

“What was that sound? What the hell did you do?” AJ slurred.

“Well, he did say that he was gonna break the door down, and he did tell you not to think he wouldn’t.” Nick replied.

“Alex, this is the last time I’m asking you, what in the hell are you doing?”

“What does it look like I’m doing?” AJ retorted. “It’s our day off man.”

“You knew that we were scheduled to perform today so don’t give me that shit. I would ask you what the hell you did last night, but by the looks of things I can pretty much guess what the hell you did.”

“You know what Kevin? Fuck you! This was our fucking day off and even though we were scheduled to perform, I didn’t have to go if I didn’t want to, and I didn’t want to go. What I fucking do is my fucking business, not yours so stay the fuck out of my life.”

“Is that how you’re gonna be Alex? You’re nothing but a fucking selfish prick man, you don’t see what you’re doing to all of us, you only care about is fucking drinking your life away. Well, go right ahead because I’m gonna do exactly as you asked, I’m gonna stay out of your life. I’m through with you Alex, I’m fucking done with you. You’re nothing to me, you hear me Alex? Nothing! You’re fucking dead to me, have fun killing yourself.”

“Kevin, stop.” Brian interjected, placing a calming hand on his cousin’s shoulder. “AJ, we’re just trying to help man, I mean look at you. Your health isn’t up to par and we’re concerned for you. Getting drunk all the time isn’t doing anything from you.”

“You guys don’t know how it fucking feels to lose someone you’re so fucking close to dude! You guys know how this industry works, they don’t give a shit about you, all they care about is the money we make for them. Losing my grandmother was like losing my mother and I didn’t have time to grieve man, I didn’t do shit. I wasn’t even there for her when she needed me most… ya’ll don’t know how it feels man.”

“You gonna sit there and tell me I don’t know how it feels to lose someone I’m close to?” Kevin snapped. “If you haven’t forgotten, I lost my father. I wanted the whole world to stop and grieve just as I was, but life doesn’t work that way. So, don’t you sit there and tell me I don’t know how it feels. You gotta stop acting like the whole world is out to get you and you need to open your eyes to see what you’re doing to all of us, your fans, your family… yourself.”

“I’m not doing anything to myself, I’m doing something for myself. All I feel is the mental pain and there’s no way I can get rid of it…”

“And getting drunk is the answer to all your problems?”

“Shut the fuck up already Kevin. Get the fuck out of here, all of you. I’m fucking tired of explaining myself to you guys, I don’t need to anyway. Just get the fuck out and leave me the fuck alone!”

AJ’s outburst caused everything to fall silent, no one said anything. Hesitantly, Nick and Brian made their way out of the room, not saying a word. Kevin just remained standing there, staring at a man he no longer knew; a man that was deeply consumed by his alter ego.

“Who the hell are you?” Kevin asked before he left.

AJ looked up once more, waiting to hear the door close, but he forgot that Kevin had knocked it in. He remained silent for a while to make sure that they were gone. When he realized that they were, he finally push himself up off his bed and tried his best to make his way to the bathroom. His legs gave way and he collapsed to the ground, laughing when he did.

He gave out a maniacal laugh, “Who the hell are you?” he mocked. “Who the fuck does he think he is?”

As he started to ponder over the question, he broke down crying. Kevin was the one who played the father figure role not only in the band, but in his life. He was the one who was always there for him when he found himself in trouble. He was always there to comfort him when he was down. He was the one who he deeply admired from the get go and has made a major impact in his life. Kevin was right, he could no longer do this to the rest of the fellas, it wasn’t fair to them.

He crawled over towards his bed and reached out to grab his cell phone, which was on his nightstand. He dialed Marcus’s number and waited for someone to answer.

“Hello?”

“Marcus…” his voice cracked, he couldn’t hold it in, he broke down all over again. “Schedule a flight for me out to Florida, and call my mom and let her know I’m coming home.”

“Why, what’s going on AJ? Are you okay man?”

AJ shook his head and choked on his tears, “I can’t do this anymore… I just want to go home. I quit.”

~*~*~*~*~

“Nick?” AJ called out, knocking on his hotel door. He got a call from him the other night, asking him if he could fly out to New Jersey to see him do a show for his “Now Or Never” tour.

As a group, they decided to go on a indefinite hiatus to give AJ the required time he needed to attend rehab and straighten out his priorities. A lot of people had speculated that they broke up, the Backstreet Boys were no more, but it wasn’t true. He felt that he was the one to blame for people thinking that way. During the hiatus, Nick decided to go on and pursue something he’s been wanting to do for a long time, a solo rock career.

Kevin, Howie and Brian began to think that this was really the end of the group when Nick decided to do his solo album and they started to blame the distance on him. AJ could only stand there helpless as they continued to blame everything on Nick, he didn’t even have the guts to stand up in his behalf. All he could do was stand there and watch as guilt gnawed at his heart, he was the REAL reason why they were on hiatus, why they were so distant from one another, why wouldn’t someone just verbally come out and say it? Maybe because they feared that blaming him would cause him to fall into his old habits again. One thing he knew for sure was that Nick was unhappy; unhappy at the fact that he felt that his album was a flop and unhappy at the fact that he felt no one was supporting him through the process.

“Nick,” AJ called again, continuing to knock on the door. “C’mon Nicky, it’s me… open up.” he hadn’t referred to him as Nicky in ages, he didn’t like that nickname. The only time he called him Nicky was when he was serious with Nick, which was rare. It was the same way with him, they only called him Alex when they were serious.

He fell silent, waiting to hear Nick shuffling around to answer the door, but he heard nothing. Part of him wanted to just give up and leave, fly back to Florida, but the other part of him wanted to let Nick know that he was there for him. He didn’t want Nick to think that no one showed up to support him, he wanted to make sure that Nick knew he was there to support him.

He slowly placed a hand on the doorknob and twisted it, finding it to be unlocked. He slowly pushed the door open and peered in, greeted by darkness.

“Nick?” he whispered, walking into the dark room and closing the door behind him.

He groped the wall, looking for the light, and switched it on when he finally found it. He squeezed his eyes close, the harsh light burning his eyes, but soon opened it to find that no one was in the room. His stuff was all over the place, his clothes and belongings out of his suitcase and strewn all over his bed and floor. He picked up a shirt that was carelessly thrown on a chair and held it up, it was the same shirt he was wearing tonight, which meant he was here.

He turned towards the bathroom and noticed that the door was closed but the light was on. He knocked on the door, “Nick?” he waited for a while to see if he’d get a reply. “Nick, it’s me… can I come in?” he fell silent again, waiting for an answer, but there was nothing.

He twisted the doorknob and pushed the door open slowly, “Nick?” he questioned, finally pushing the door all the way open to see Nick sitting on the toilet, drinking straight out of a Jack Daniel’s bottle.

Nick glanced up, drunkness glazed in his eyes. “What do you want?”

AJ walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind him, kneeling down before him. “I came to see you, what are you doing man?” he eyed the bottle, temptation kicking in but he fought the urge, the situation wasn’t about him at the moment.

Nick picked the bottle up again and placed it to his lips, ready to take another swig. “Drinking? Want some?”

AJ’s heart stopped and he stared at the bottle long and hard; Nick was truly drunk. “No Nick, stop doing this to yourself.” he reached out to grab the bottle, but Nick moved away. “C’mon Nick, please?”

“Don’t ‘please’ me AJ!” Nick slurred. “You don’t know how it feels… no one cares about me man, everything is always my fault. You guys make me feel like I’m nothing but a fucking mistake… going on hiatus was a mistake, me going solo was a mistake, me releasing an album was a mistake…” he paused, trying to hold back his tears but finally broke down and sobs began to wrack his body. “me trusting you guys was a mistake.”

“Nick, don’t say that.” AJ said as he reached out to grab the bottle away from Nick, actually succeeding. “You know that’s not true…”

“That’s all I ever hear, ‘Nick don’t do this’, ‘Nick don’t do that’, ‘Nick this is all your fault… I’m tired of it AJ. I thought you guys would at least be proud of me, but you all just proved me wrong!”

“Is that how you really feel. Nick, when you called me last night I was… shocked! To tell you the truth, I wasn’t receiving calls from anybody, not even Howie. I felt that everyone was isolating me because of what happened… if anything, I’m the one to blame for the hiatus, not you. And I am very proud of you Nick, best believe… if I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be here. As soon as I got off the phone with you, I booked the soonest flight out here. I am very proud of you, and I support you in everything and anything you do.”

Nick remained silent, he did have a point. “You were here the whole time?”

“From beginning to end.” AJ replied with a smile. He stood up and began to pour the remaining Jack Daniel’s liquor in the bathroom sink. “We’re all very proud of you Nick… and we’re always gonna be here for you, no matter what.”

Nick shot his hand out and grabbed AJ by the wrist. “And I want you to know… that I’m very proud of you too. You’re not to blame for any of this… you wanted help, we wanted you to get help and that’s exactly what happened. Focusing on your health first was what mattered most, don’t ever feel like you’re to blame for any of this.”

AJ smiled and helped Nick off the toilet. “Same for you bro. Now c’mon man, lets get you outta here and into your bed.”

“Thanks Jay… for everything.”

AJ looked down at him and smiled, “That’s what brothers are for.”

~*~*~*~*~

“Well, the boys wanted to be here today to tell you how proud of you they are, so come on out… Nick, Howie, Brian and Kevin.”

AJ stared long and hard at Oprah, what she was saying to her not really registering in his mind at first. After she announced their names, he turned and looked only to see Nick walking out first, followed by Howie, Brian and Kevin. A slow smile crept up on AJ’s face as he pushed himself up off the couch and embraced Howie first in a tight hug, not really believing that the guys were really there for him. He moved on to hug Nick, then Brian, and when it came to Kevin he could only stare at the genuine tears that were welling up in his eyes, his father figure, his older brother who had made that life changing intervention in his life.

Once things settled down, Oprah continued on with the interview. A few good laughs were released, easing the tension that was at first built. Since they’ve been on hiatus, they really haven’t came together in a single room and just sat down to talk, so of course having them all together on the Oprah show made things awkward at first, but all of that melted away when the laughs came into play and they exchanged words with one another.

“Who came in from London?” Oprah questioned.

“Nick” they all replied.

The audience began to applaud as Oprah thanked him. Nick simply smiled, “Anything for him man,” he said as he gestured over at AJ. “That’s what it’s all about.”

As the interview proceeded, AJ could only stare at the fellas in shock, still in disbelief at the fact that they were all there, after all this time of being away from each other for him. It was good to see Kevin as the same sappy, yet stern person he’s always been, his father figure and still his older brother. It was good seeing Howie still being the same old Sweet D. they’ve all known him to be. It was good seeing that Brian never lost his sense of humor, nor faith. It was good seeing Nick happy then he had seen him before. It was just damn good seeing all them together after all this time being apart from one another.

“Well, that was interesting…” AJ remarked as they left Harpo Studio.

“Tell me about it, it was a freaking tear fest!” Nick teased as he nudged Kevin in his side.

Kevin playfully pushed Nick away from him, “Shutup Nick, I honestly think it was a healthy release for all of us, don’t you think?” he turned to look at everyone when no one replied. “C’mon now, I wasn’t the only one up there all teary eyed.”

AJ laughed, “Nah man, it really was good. But really, I just want to thank you guys for being here for me… this meant a lot to me and I just can’t thank you guys enough for supporting me through it, even though I didn’t know you guys were acutally here the whole time until the end!”

“You should’ve got a hint when I called you last night!” Brian said.

“I know, but it still didn’t dawn on me. We’ve been away from each other for so long that I…” AJ paused for a while, thinking of the right words to say. “I was beginning to wonder if we were still a group… if we were still brothers.”

Kevin wrapped a comforting arm around AJ’s shoulders. “No matter what happens to us, nothing will ever change our brotherhood, nothing.”

“To tell you guys the truth, when we were in there I thought I heard an audible sigh being released from all the girls all over the world.” the rest of them began to laugh at Nick. “I’m serious, I shit you not man! We really need to write a long thank you letter to Oprah for reuniting us once again… speaking of which, I wonder how much “thank you” mail she’s going to receive from our fans…”

“Could you get anymore big headed?” Howie joked as he gently tapped Nick in the back of his head.

AJ simply laughed, “So, who’s ready for another album?”

Everything fell silent, no one said a word. AJ had to turn to see if they were all still there or not due to the silence.

“That’s a lot of stuff we’ll be getting ready for…” Kevin finally replied. “I mean, are you guys seriously ready for all the chaos? Touring, dancing, practicing, recording…”

“That’s the beauty of it all!” AJ said with a smile. “I thought we were ready for anything?”

“We are, but Kevin’s just skeptic because he’s a dinosaur and he‘s too old to be doing any of this!” Nick cracked, dodging away from Kevin when he reached out to slap Nick in the back of the head. “You guys seriously need to think of another place to hit me. You guys always hit me in the head, no wonder most of my brain cells are gone.”

“You didn’t have much brain cells for us to knock out anyway.” Howie fired back.

They all broke out laughing. “No, but seriously…” AJ said, bringing the laughter to a cease. “I’m ready for all of it… all over again. We’ve been off for a long time, and through it all our fans managed to stay loyal to us. It’s the least we could do for their loyalty… and I’m seriously tired of people asking me if the Backstreet Boys were done for.”

Kevin groaned, “Gosh, we decide to do something for ourselves by taking off for a year or two versuses the nine straight years we’ve been touring and people speculate that we’re gone, that we’re done for. Where the hell did we go, we were never really gone…”

“That would be a good album title.” Brian said.

“What, where the hell did we go?” Nick asked, laughing. “I can see it now, the Backstreet Boys release their sixth album entitled ‘Where The Hell Did We Go?’”

“I thought we agreed upon ‘Holy Hell We’re Back Again’?” Brian questioned.

“Fine, it’ll be ‘Holy Hell We’re Back Again, But Where The Hell Did We Go In The First Place’?”

They all laughed, “Longest and most ridiculous album title known to man.” Kevin retorted.

Brian shook his head, “But foreal, what you said before Kevin would be a great album title…”

“And that would be…” Kevin asked, leaving his sentence open for Brian to answer.

“Never Gone.”

Kevin nodded, “Never Gone… I like it…”

AJ came in between Kevin and Brian and wrapped his arms around their shoulders. “So, it’s on then? Are we ready for all of this again?”

Kevin looked over at his four brothers and smiled, “What do you mean are we ready for this? We were Never Gone…”

~*~*~*~*~

“Alex… Alex, look at me man.”

AJ opened his eyes and tried to look at the person who was calling him though the small slits of his eyes. He had hoped that it was all just a dream, he was with his brothers before and everything was fine, but the pain in his stomach was telling him otherwise. That’s when he realized that his life literally flashed before his eyes. He remembered staring wide eyed at the man and the gun, and all he could do was close his eyes. Once his eyes fluttered close, the life he shared with his four brothers flooded his mind, everything had came back to him, he had his memory back.

“Look at me buddy, stay with me okay?” Nick begged. His head snapped up and he began look around, “Someone’s gotta look for help, someone go call for help now.”

“Nick…” AJ gasped, feeling a pool of blood raise from his esophagus and into his mouth.

Nick lowered his head towards AJ’s mouth, not being able to understand what exactly he said. “Yes?”

Tears began streaming down AJ’s face, “I remember…” he choked out. “I remember everything Nick…”

Nick began to cry hysterically, not liking the way AJ was acting. “You do? What do you remember buddy?” he whispered, trying to strike up a conversation to keep him conscious.

“I remember…” AJ gurgled, pausing when a new pain wracked his body. “I remember us… we’d always fight over who we’d share rooms with… in the hotel… and I… I remember when you and I… got into that big argument… you were, asking me why I always so mean to you… do you remember that?”

Nick smiled and tried to bat away the tears that were freely cascading down his cheeks. “Yeah, I remember.”

“I was really jealous of you Nick…” AJ cried. “I’ve always… wanted to know, how it felt to be you.” he fell silent, closing his eyes. Talking was beginning to become too much of a task for him.

“Hey Alex.” Nick called out, shaking him gently to wake him up again. “C’mon, tell me what else you remember.”

AJ opened his eyes once more, he was getting tired. “I remember when you guys saved my life…” he paused as more tears spewed from his eyes. “I’ll never forget the day you saved my life Nick… Kevin broke the damn door down…” he paused again, trying to chuckle but the pain prevented him from doing so. “and you called me… you wanted me to be… you wanted me to be…” he began to studder, it was so cold now. “I was there Nick… didn’t you see me? I was there from beginning to end… you believe me don’t you?”

“Yes, I believe you.” Nick whispered, confused as to what he was talking about.

“I was always so proud of you Nick… I loved, your album… I know… we didn’t show it much, but you made us all proud in so many ways…”

Nick wiped away the tears that were trickling down the side of AJ’s face as he tried hard to fight away the hot, salty liquid that was swelling in his eyes. “I’m proud of you too Alex… I’ve always been so proud to call you my older brother…”

AJ tried his best to smile, but his senses were quickly fading away from him. “How could I ever forget this… all that we’ve shared… over all these years… they’re memories Nick… it was taken away from me… but now I got it back, I got it all back… I don’t…” he choked and swallowed hard, more blood was rising in his throat. “I don’t… want to lose it all again…”

“You’re not gonna lose it… it’s here to stay…”

AJ tried to take a deep breath in, but his body wouldn’t allow him to. He could feel himself choking, suffocating on the blood that was blocking his airway. There was so much more he wanted to tell Nick, but time was only permitting him to do so much, and he knew this was it. Time was only giving him seconds to get out a few more words and he had to make it count.

“I love you guys…” he whispered, his eyes fluttering close.

“Alex, don’t you say that!” Nick yelled, trying to get AJ to open his eyes again.

A shot rang out, tearing Nick’s attention away from AJ for a moment. He turned around in time to see Brian collapse to the ground and a man standing behind him, gun in hand.

AJ felt everything close in on him; he could no longer talk, he could no longer move, he couldn’t open his eyes… all he could do was hear what was going on around him. Gun shot after gun shot went off, and he wasn’t sure who it hit or what was going on. He heard blood curling screams come from his brothers and Nick screaming in rage and anger.

He truly didn’t want to lose his memory again, but as quickly as it came back, it was all leaving him again just as fast. Who ever knew life could change so fast in the blink of an eye? All it took was one man to change everything, and leave their lives incomplete.

He sat there in the hard, tight chair, hands clasped together as he twiddled his fingers together. He looked up at the TV that was positioned in the corner of the waiting room and seen CNN covering the incident on the Backstreet Boys. He quickly tore his eyes away from the TV and looked at the table that was positioned in front of him, seeing magazines scattered on the surface, pictures of the Backstreet Boys on the front cover. No matter where he looked he would see his five sons everywhere.

“Johnny Wright?”

He glanced up at the person who called his name and rose out of his chair to address the doctor who called him. “I’m Johnny Wright.”

“May I see some identification please?”

Johnny fished into his pockets and pulled out his wallet, pulling out his license and handing it over to the doctor.

The doctor looked down at his license and nodded, handing it back over to Johnny. “I’m Dr. McNorton and I have been assigned to these five gentlemen again…”

“Are they okay?” Johnny blurted out, not meaning to interrupt him but he needed to know.

“You may want to take a seat Mr. Wright…”

“Please, just tell me if they’re okay.”

Dr. McNorton took in a deep breath and sighed, “They were all shot in different places. Kevin Richardson was shot in the leg and the bullet actually shattered his left tibia. Howie Dorough only suffered laceration for the bullet only grazed the upper part of his right arm. Brian Littrell was shot in his right shoulder which left an exit wound. Alexander James McLean was shot in the stomach and Nick Carter was shot in the chest. All except for Alex and Nick are conscious… they slipped into a comatose state upon arrival. We aren’t…” he paused, trying to fight the emotions that were slowly taking over. “Nick has a high chance of going brain dead while Alex… we aren’t sure if he’s gonna make it through the night, but we’re keeping a watchful eye on the both of them.”

Johnny could only stare at the doctor in disbelief. “They loss a major amount of blood and we’re calling an emergency blood drive.” Dr. McNorton informed. “The blood we have in stock isn’t going to be enough and we’re hoping that the blood transfusion will increase Nick and Alex’s chance of pulling though.”

“Is there… anyway I can see them?” Johnny hesitantly questioned.

“You are more than welcomed to visit Kevin Richardson, Howie Dorough and Brian Littrell. Nick Carter and Alexander James McLean are in the intensive care unit and we’re only allowing immediate family members to visit them at this time.”

Johnny nodded as he rose from the chair to follow Dr. McNorton towards the rooms.

“Johnny, wait!” a voice called out.

Johnny stopped and turned around to see Eric running towards him. “Hold on Dr. McNorton.” he whispered as he approached Eric. “What is it?”

“I got a call from officials and the coroners… we need to heighten security ASAP.”

“Why?”

“After reviewing the recording from the 911 dispatcher, there was a report of six people being present at the crime scene.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Besides the five of them, no other bodies were found at the cemetery.”