“Angie, we need to talk.”

“Not now Sam. I’m very busy. Later alright.” She said without looking at him. Her refusal initiated more insistence in his voice, as he stood still behind her ignoring all the glares and whispering among her friends.

“No Anne, I want to talk to you now.” His soft voice became lower and sterner as he gave a sharp stare at her.

“Sam please! Don’t be such a pain will you? Can’t you see I’m having a group discussion right now? I said, I’ll see you later-”

“I said right now Anne! NOW!” The loud yelling startled almost everyone at the table. No one said anything, not even a slightest hiss of whispering as they turned and looked at their friend.

“Anne… is everything okay?” The brunette released a soft weak sigh as she looked down at the concrete floor, searching for excuses to avoid from having another row of dispute with him. “Anne?”

“Okay… everything is okay. I’ll go and talk to him… you guys go ahead with it. I’ll be back shortly.”

“You sure?” She gave a light nod as her eyes shimmered with strong protestation but what else could she do? He was not in a right state of mind to accept NO as an answer and saying YES came with a huge burden on her shoulders. “You know Anne, maybe you don’t have to go-”

“And what? Let him create scenes here? Or maybe to let him harass you guys again? No Josh… I’m tired of running away from him, maybe its time for me to settle it once and for all. Just like what you said, I can’t keep on running away right?”

“But Anne, don’t you remember what happen last week-”

“Its okay Josh… I’ll be fine, don’t worry. You guys will be here so I don’t think he dares to do anything stupid anyway.” Angela’s assurance did not seem to get rid of the worries on her close friend’s face. Two days ago, he saw them quarreling outside her locker area and she ended up having a cut on her lips. A fall she claimed but he was not a fool to believe that it was just being a plain fall. He had seen bruises on her arms before due to the ‘unintentional’ slapping and pinches but Angela never want to talk about it. She always kept it inside herself.

“Listen, if he tries to be funny, you know I’m here right?”

Angela nodded her head for the third time and grabbed her bag. The contortion on Sam’s face looked both scary and annoying to her. After what has happened on Friday, she tried to keep a distant away from him. Moreover, she has lost trust on him completely. His level of sensitivity and suspicious escalated over the past few weeks forcing her to be more careful with her words. He could easily be amused in one second and agitated the next whenever he was not satisfied with her reasons or explanation. He had the habit of finding loopholes in them then, he will twist and turn the facts to use it against her.

“Alright Sam… we are here now so… out with it.”

“Here?”

“Yeah… what’s wrong with it here?”

“No, no… I mean… I thought we’re going to… you know the park or something? Where we can really talk?” At the back of his head, he was expecting Angela to choose a more secluded area for a better privacy.

“No, here is fine.” Insisted Angela.

“You scare of me?”

“Is there a reason why I should be scare of you? I mean… apart from that slap, I think I’m fine.” The slapping incident that happened a few days ago remained afresh in his mind and since then, he was haunted by his own guilt-trip. “You just want to talk isn’t it?” He wanted to touch the cut on her lower lips but Angela pushed his hands away. “Stop it Sam… you said you want to talk so… what is it?”

“Well, at least have a sit Anne.”

“Its okay, I’m fine standing…”

“Suit yourself then.”

“So what is it that you want?”

“Well… I uhhmmm… I… gosh… this is harder than I thought. You know… I always get tongue-tied when I face you…”

“Please Sam… I don’t have all day for this so if you don’t mind, say what you want to say now.”

“Alright, alright… I want to say I’m sorry…”

“Oh yes you should!”

“Look Anne, I’m really, really sorry for what happened the other day… I know its my fault and I was being too emotional… you know things are getting a bit off-sided for me nowadays…”

“Right! Things are getting off-sided for you and there you are taking it out on me! I don’t think that’s fair on me Sam.”

“I know that Anne, and that’s the thing, that’s the reason why I want to see you today… I want to say I’m sorry… I promise I won’t do it again-”

“That’s enough Sam! I’m tired of your sorry, your promises and I’m tired of you taking it out on me, embarrassing me in front of my friends… everytime you say you’re sorry, I don’t think you’re even sincere about it because you keep doing the same old thing.”

“No Anne… this time… I’m really sorry… I know… I shouldn’t have done that to you… you know these voices inside my head… its… its very loud… and its telling me… telling me to-”

“Stop it Sam! Look… I don’t need any explanation from you. Is this all you want to talk to me about? If it is, then I would say our conversation is done!”

Sam scratched his forehead. He realized that Angela was still mad at him. Her sarcastic tone and her expression revealed it all. To face her proved to be more complicated than he thought. All his fiery guys seemed to fade the moment their eyes met for the first time that morning. The same pair of eyes that used to glow with warmth and innocence had suddenly turned cold and distant. The new glow in them exposed the changes in her and the changes in the way she treated him made him edgy and all tensed up. Perhaps the meet-up was bad idea, he thought in his heart.

“Are you going to start talking or will you just stand there and keep quiet?” Her snappish voice brought him back from his daze.

“Sorry… actually I… I… I just want to know… why are you avoiding me Anne?”

“Excuse me? What do you mean I’m avoiding you?”

“I called you a few times last weekend but you… you don’t want to take my calls and when I go over to your place, you’re always not in… now, you’re giving me this cold shoulders, you’re not the same Anne I used to know… you’ve changed.”

“You know what Sam? I can’t believe we’re having this conversation and… as far as I’m concern, my conscious is clear. I’m not avoiding you, I’m not giving you any cold shoulders and I certainly am the same person. If there should be anyone who changed, that is you.”

“Me? You’re saying that I’ve changed? What do you mean I’ve changed?” Angela sighed. If only she could present him a mirror to reflect what he had done, then there was no need for any further clarification. Let him learnt and watched his own mistakes and changes, she thought.

“Just forget it Sam-”

“No! I want to know what do you mean I’ve changed! I want to know it Anne!”

“I said forget it Sam-”

“No! I’m not going to let it rest until you tell me what do you mean I’ve changed! Tell me Anne, what is it that I’ve changed? Tell me!”

“That’s it! You want to know how you’ve changed? You’re being too persistence Sam and I’ve had enough of your nonsense! You try to control me… my movements, my friends, can’t you see that? Whenever I’m not free to pick up your call or to see you, you accused me of flirting around even with my own close friends-”

“No I didn’t-”

“Yes you did! Don’t think I know nothing about your stupid confrontation with all my guy friends! Who are you Sam? You have absolutely no right at all to meddle in my personal life!”

“Of course I do! You are my girl Anne and I have every right to know all your friends especially those guys and I-”

“Wait, wait! Just hold it right there! What did you say just now? I’m your WHAT?” This time, Angela was too fuming to even care if her voice attracted unwanted attention from other students. She was too taken aback by Sam’s so-called self-declaration of their relationship.

“You are my girl Anne and as your boyfriend… of course I hate it when people start to talk bad about you, spreading nasty rumours about you… those guys, they’re just using you Anne and I’m only trying to protect you –”

“Stop it Sam! Stop it! This is so ridiculous… we need to get a few things straight here! First and foremost, I’m not your girl and never was. I don’t know where and what gives you the idea that we’re… having a relationship but as far as I can remember and as far as I’m concern… between you and I, we’re just friends. You are just a friend and nothing more!”

“No! You are lying!”

“Oh God Sam! What else do you want me to do to convince you that there’s nothing going on between us?”

“If there’s really nothing between us, then why do we always… hang on the phone, why are you always been so nice to me? Why… why are you still wearing the chain I gave you?” Sam asked in an almost teary mannered. Maybe the confession was too much for him to absorb but that was the reality. As much as she pitied him like she always did, she knew she had to straighten the facts in his head. In doing so, she had to be firm.

Angela shook her head lightly as she bit her upper lip. “Sam… why are you doing this to yourself?” She muttered softly.

“So now… you still dare to say there’s nothing between us?”

“Look Sam… I gave you my number because I thought you really need help in your schoolwork. I am being nice not only to you but to all my friends, furthermore I don’t see why I should be rude to you if you did nothing wrong to me but…”

“But what Anne?”

“What you have done lately… is simply ridiculous, the confrontation… and your controlling of my life… and this… you mean if I wear this, I’m automatically yours? Its what? A talisman to show to people that I’m your girl? Sam, you gave it to me as a present remember? There’s no indication or anything to show that once I wear this, I am yours. It’s a present and I’m taking it as one. Nothing more than that! Josh gave me this watch, are you saying that I’m having an affair with him? Danny gave me this bag, does that mean I’m his girl too? If ten guys give me presents and I’m using them, will that mean I’m whoring myself by being everyone’s girl? What do you think I am Sam? Gosh… I can’t believe this…”

“No Anne… please don’t say that... you know that I love you, I love you very much Anne… very much, I know… I know its my mistake, I didn’t get to give you all those material things… but please don’t do this to me Anne… please-”

“But I don’t!”

“What?”

“I said I don’t love you Sam so please stop this madness will you?” She tried to keep her voice under control. Afterall she only wanted Sam to know the truth without the need of any further tongue-lashing session.

“No, no… I don’t believe you… its all because of him isn’t it?” His voice stirred with jealousy and anger as he moved up closer to her. Voices of his unfounded suspicious seemed to subdue his cool. Right from the day he saw the changes in the way she treated him, having those rumours deafening inside his ears and the sights of them together in school swayed his trust on her. By then, he was totally convinced that there was something going on between the two of them. All he needed was time to catch them red-handed but he never thought the time came sooner than he had expected. Angela’s acknowledgment of her secret affair was more than enough.

“Great! Who are you accusing now?”

“Kevin.”

“What? Are you nuts? He’s my -”

“I’m not blind Anne! The way you treated him… both of you… have something going on isn’t it? He went to your house yesterday to sugar talk you to leave me right?”

“What? How did you know he come to my house yesterday?”

“I’m your boyfriend Anne and its my job to protect you wherever you are…” Her mouth gaped with disgust. She was aware of him tailing her in school and she had caught him doing that before. A couple of times to be exact but she simply brushed it off sensing nothing worst could have happened. Nonetheless, the spying part came as the last straw for Angela.

“You… you were spying on me? I can’t believe this-”

“Anne, Anne… listen to me… whatever he said, don’t trust him alright. He is only making use of you-”

“No Sam… I think its you that can’t be trusted now…”

“What?”

“You follow me everywhere in school and I keep quiet about it but now, you’re telling me that you actually spy on me… at home? You’re sick you know that?”

“I told you Anne… I just want to protect you-”

“Enough Sam! Not another word! I’ve had enough of all these from you Sam! Listen to me Sam and listen it good, there is nothing going on between us, not now, not before and not ever… you have no right, no right at all to interfere in my life and you have no right to control me or to stop me from making friends with whoever I want even if its Kevin, Kenny or whoever it is. From today onwards, I don’t want to see your face again! You got me?”

“Anne-”

“You got me? I said I don’t want to see you again!”

“No Anne! No, listen to me! You’re not breaking up with me aren’t you?”

“Sam, don’t you get it at all? What… what is there to break when we have no relationship at all in the first place?”

“Look Anne… look, look… look… you’re not doing yourself a favour by doing this you know…”

“Let go of my hands Sam or I’ll start screaming.” Angela tried to break away from his grip but Sam refused to let go of her hands. He did not mean to impose any harm on his loved one, he only wanted her to see things the way he did. In his point of view. He just wanted to knock some sense back into her head, how others were simply taking advantage of her but he was puzzled at how Angela reacted to his concern.

What is happening to you love? What did I do? Where did things go wrong now? You know I love you Anne, I love you so much, how could it be possible that I want to hurt you? Why are you being so mean to me Anne? Why?

Its all his fault… I knew it! Its all his fault!

“Please Anne… don’t do this to me… please… please!” His pleadings were getting more and more persuasive. As if Angela’s retaliation to break free from him was not enough for him to deal with, those voices in his head kept irritating him to the extent that he did not realize he had actually squeezed her arms tight.

“Let me go! You’re hurting me Sam! Let me go!” Angela’s cries alerted her friends who rushed over to her aid.

“Hey let go of her!” Josh’s sharp screaming from behind broke the struggle.

“Oh God… oh God… what did I do? Anne? Anne, listen to me, it wasn’t me alright… Anne-”

“Look pal, I think its best that you get your ass out of here before things start to get nasty!” Josh said as he pushed Sam away and by now Anne had sought for safety behind her friend, still massaging her arms.

“Look Anne… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“Did you hear what I say? Get your ass out of here-”

“I’m not talking to you! I’m talking to Anne!”

“Oh yeah? If you want to talk to her, you’ve got to do it through me! Now, get fuck off!”

“Anne please listen to me… Anne-”

“Enough Sam! That’s enough! You are sick you know that! You are sick! I don’t want to see you again!”

“You heard that? She doesn’t want to see you again so fuck off man!”

“You’re going to regret this Anne… you will-”

“Oh! Now you’re threatening her? You actually have the balls to threaten her? You think she’s going to give in to your stupid threat? Listen here and listen good, before things really get out of hands, I want you to leave her alone. You copy that? Leave her alone or else you’ll be in deep shit!”

“Don’t push it too far my friend or-”

“Hello? Did I just hear a bee buzzing around? Look, I’m not your friend alright! Furthermore what will you do? Kill me?”

“I will… but before that I will hunt him down Anne… heard that? I will hunt him down-” His threat came with a slight cut on his lips, just the way he did to Angela when Josh threw a punch on his face.

“That’s enough guys… that’s enough! Come Josh, let’s go! Let’s go man!” Interrupted AJ from the side as he tried to break the two of them.

“But Anne… we are not done yet-”

“It is now. I want you to get this straight in your sick head alright… don’t try to call or see her again or else, I’m so gonna bash your face! You got that?” Sam’s defiance to Josh’s warning set hurdles to the already intensity at the study corner as Sam was taken and held up against the wall by the collar of his shirt. “I don’t like your face so better be sure you don’t ever come across my path or else I will definitely let you have another taste of my fist!”

“Cut it out dude! Come on stop it! Just let him go!” Despite of his small-built body, AJ managed to persuade Josh to release his clutch on Sam and pulled him back to his side. “Stop it man! You’ll only make things worse now!” He continued in an almost whispering mannered as he slapped Josh on his chest.

“He’s asking for it!”

“Yeah but still dude! You think beating the fucker up will make him stop?” AJ was right.

“You’re right! Maybe I should just kill him-”

“No man! Stop it!”

“Let me go Jay! Let me teach him a lesson to respect others!”

“Stop it man! You are not making things easier for Anne too and if you keep doing this, you’ll get us all in deep shit man!” Josh pulled himself away from AJ and released a strong punch in the air. AJ swallowed his saliva down and turned to his other friend. “You alright there girl? Anne?”

“Huh?”

“You alright?”

“Yeah… I’m fine…”

“Good… let’s go then… Josh let’s go!”

Anne please don’t leave me… please Anne… please…

“Wait Jay…” Angela unhooked the gift and walked a few steps forward. “Here… you can have it back!” Instead of placing it down on his palm, she threw the silver chain with a star-shaped pendant right on his chest. Without a second look at him, she walked away with Josh and AJ. Although she managed to display a composure expression on her face, deep inside she was both shaken up and disgusted by his acts. Finally, it was over. She could now sleep peacefully, she thought.

Sam on the other hand, was still on the floor with both hands on his stomach in enduring the effect of Josh’s kick. Though Angela saw his lips bleeding, yet she was insensitive about it. That was contrary to the first time they met a year ago. She was the one who reached out her hands over to him when he was beaten up by those bullies in school. She was the one who helped to clean up his cut and she was the one who gave new meaning in his life.

His eyes were red and watery. Not sure if it was caused by the twirling pain inside his stomach, or due to the arising vengeance boiling up inside his heart. Perhaps the reason could just be that he had lost her for forever.

How could you do this to me Anne? How could you?

That’s it Sam! You’ve lost!

No, this is not the end! Not yet. I will not give her up. Never. She can walk away but she never hides from me. I will kill whoever tries to take her away from me, I will. And I swear I will make them pay for doing this to me. To us.

You are so confident Sam! Look, where is she now? She has walked out on you Sam, in their arms!

I hate them! I hate them!

So? What can you do? You sure you want to be a killer? Kill them all?

Of course! I will kill them all!

Even Kevin?

He is in my top list, after that I will get that son of a bitch down for hurting me. Blood for a blood.

Good, then you must kill Anne too!

Kill Anne? No! She’s my love, how can I kill her?

She hurts you remember?

Hurt me? No… its not her fault! Its them… they’re the one who must have instigated her to say all those things! She loves me… she wouldn’t be saying all those things. Its NOT her!

Right! You’re living in denial Sam. She has said it right to your face that she doesn’t love you. Not now, not before and maybe not ever. You have threaten in front of her, she can even testify against you in Court for killing them and… since you’re so keen in doing the dirty job, might as well finish it up.

Shut up!

Then I guess she is right afterall!

What?

That you’re sick!

I’m NOT sick alright! Who said I’m sick?

Prove it then!

I will prove it to them! Oh yes… I will.

Watching Angela leaving him was like having half of his soul departing his body. It was more agonizing than those punches and the pain was excruciating than the cut on his lips. He took the chain and clutched it firm in his palm, so firm that he could feel the sharp pointing star pendant slicing through his skin. His palm was bleeding, so was his heart. Her words were like venom that quickly spread in his ached heart and in a way it was affecting his brain. The past that he buried years ago emerged as if it has been excavated back from hell. The love that once upon a time he had for her so soon replaced with umbrage and hatred.

He was hurt and the hurt was too deep.

I love you Anne but you left me with not much choice…

The incident perturbed him so much that he was too distraught to attend any lessons that morning, and decided to rest in his rental flat, which he shared with few other students. The throbbing jab in his head became wilder as he tried to refrain himself from getting too emotional. He knew he was on the tendency of doing something stupid but it was too late. There was no turning back. She had chosen that path and he will lead her till the end.

Angela’s photo that was nicely pinned up on his personal notice board reminded him of their earlier conversation. Her charming smile added more salt to his wounded heart. Her laughter that used to be his sweet lullaby suddenly sounded like an evil mockery, mocking him for being a fool. He should have known better than to carry a torch for her. She was afterall, the school’s top student gifted with brain and beauty whereas for him…

He was just a nobody.

The way she raised her voice at him that morning, the way she tried to defend her new lover and the way he was humiliated by her friends triggered a new wave of rage inside him. Those voices kept adding pressures in his already baffled head. How it tried to influence him to teach her a lesson and above all, he has to prove to others that he was neither sick or was he a weakling. He will execute his words, even the killing part. The only question he had in mind was, how?

Using a knife was not effective and satisfactory enough. To poison them will need proper planning and planning itself requires time and patience.

Time and patience? Do you really have them?

No, I don’t have the time and patience. Not anymore. I just want them to die now! They deserve to die and will die in the most horrible way.

That’s my boy! That’s what I’m talking about! Kill them, and kill them all even Angela…

How many times do I have to tell you? I will not kill Anne! Get that!

He shook his head strongly, protesting to the suggestions voiced out in his head. In a way, the voice right. Time was and has never been kind on him and because of that, his patience had totally drained out. He wanted something fast, fatal and less hassle. While he was cracking up his head, shaking it vigorously to find other ideas, he then remembered the precious object that he kept all his life. How he had hidden it well and safe in his wardrobe. He had seen how his father used it before. How it instantly ended all miseries in just one blast.

Without wasting time, he scurried his way to his wardrobe. The entire wardrobe was ransacked. Almost everything was thrown out and scattered on the floor. His eyes went high and low searching for the chest while his hands kept digging underneath the thick pile of clothes. He was on the verge of going crazy when he finally saw it from afar. The wooden chest.

The grin on his face sparkled with utmost admiration on the newfound beautiful plaything in his hands. He walked back to his bed, oblivious to all the mess on the floor that he had created because he knew he was close to having his mission accomplished.

r this, no one will dare to separate us again… no one.

It was almost two o’clock when he sneaked back into the school premises. The plan was simple. No complex drawing or formula to come up with. All he had to do was simply to return to school the soonest as possible on that very same day to carry out the task.

So far no one noticed him yet. Actually, it was not like they had ever noticed him before in the school, but sometimes it was good to be invisible. At least, when it came to major projects like the one he had in mind, no one will ever find anything amiss. Not even a bit. Of course, being invisible came with a price. Isolation, rejection, anger, self-pity, pathetic were some of the emotions that he had to deal with but soon,erything will be over he smiled to himself again, adjusting his cap.

Once in a while, he heard voices talking to him inside his head. They were praising him for being brave, for being a man and how proud he should be, and at any other times, the voice seemed to be controlling him and he hated it. He hated to be controlled and he hated to be treated like a small kid.

Shut up! I know what I’m doing! After this, no one will mess up with me now. I told you, you will be sorry for this!

Taking a wary step one at a time, he walked up to the third floor without looking at anyone. Then he gently lifted up his cap to get a better view of his target – the last classroom at the other end of the corridor. The lights were still on, indicating that he was on time. Though most of the classes were still occupied, he was not at all bothered by it. In fact, he was not interested about the others because in his mind, the only concern was the last classroom. As his steps got closer he could feel a glorious victory in hand, a victory that went way beyond everyone’s wildest imagination.

“What the fuck was that?”

“I don’t know… some kind of explosion I think…”

“Duh! I can hear that… but here?”

“Don’t worry Anne… I think its coming from the Science Lab, you know all those smart-Alec Scientist-genius future to be is like-”

“But Carrie… it came from upstairs.” Angela frowned at her friend. Out of a sudden, her heartbeat started to drill fast and hard. As much as she really hoped it came from the Laboratory but deep inside her, her intuition was telling her otherwise. Shortly after the loud noise, she heard students screaming and rushing down the stairs in heavy footsteps.

“Quick run! Run! Someone has gone mad!”

“Hey! Hey! What’s wrong?” Angela managed to stop one of them from running by grabbing her hands.

“Anne? What are you doing here?”

“What do you mean what am I doing here? I’m having a class after this… what’s wrong? Why is everyone running?”

“Anne, its best that you leave the school now-”

“Leave the school now? But why?”

“Cause Sam just went mad! He shot Mr. Richardson in his class!”

“What?”

The image of the shooting jerked him back from the dreamland as he coughed up hard, trying to gasp for air. For a moment he thought he was dead. He was not sure what actually happened but it did happen in a flash. All he remembered was seeing a boy standing at the door of his classroom pointing what he believed was a gun and before he could do anything, the boy opened fire.

The shot was fast and furious, darting straight at him. Luckily he was quick enough to react and instead of spearing through his heart like an unstoppable arrow, the bullet ended up hitting his left shoulder. The moment he was down on the floor, he could hear his students screaming and their screaming forced him to stay awake. He knew he had to stay awake to protect his students from what he thought a random shooting massacre but the wrench was fast enough to numb his entire body in such a short time.

It must have been the longest minute ever in his life before he finally passed out.

“Look officers, my patient has just regained his conscious and not in a stable position for any interrogation and my job is to make sure that he undergoes a smooth recovery here-”

“Don’t worry doctor, we’re not going to take long… furthermore everyone has a job to do. Your job is to make sure he recovers from the shot and my job is to answer to my superiors, the media and those affected families so… let’s just do each other a small favour shall we?”

“Well…”

“Please doctor, we won’t stand in your way to treat him but at the same time, please let us finish our job.”

“Alright… but remember, if my patient refuses to say or not in a good condition to cooperate with you, I would suggest that you leave this room.”

“Sure, fair enough.” The conversation ended with soft closing of the door. In spite of the fact that his eyes were shut he could sense he was not alone in the room.

Slowly he tried to open up his eyes. It was more painful than the cough, he thought as he gulped a lump of saliva down his throat.

“Mr. Richardson?”

“Hmmm…” He wanted to acknowledge the greeting but something else got his voice.

“Sorry to disturb you right now… I know its not really a good time to talk but… hmmm…”

“Eeerrrr…”

“You alright there? You want me to call the doctor?” Kevin cleared his throat once again but strange, the voice continued to get lost somewhere down there in his vocal box so he waved a simple NO gesture to them. “Alright then… hmmm… we’ll start once you’re ready…”

“Ouch…” He has never been groaning in so much pain and discomfort before in his life. It felt worst than the time he broke his index finger a few years back. The soft groans caught the attention and concern of the two strangers in his room.

“Slowly Mr. Richardson… slowly… you’re still hurt.” A low and deep husky voice kept drifted in and out of his heavy head.

Heeding up the advice, Kevin took his time to open up his eyes in slow and steady mannered. When he finally managed to have his eyes slightly open, he saw a figure standing next to his bed. He was not sure if the shot has affected his eyesight or maybe it was true that the room was dark afterall. Attempts to rub both his eyes to clear the blurry visions ended with soft moans as he could hardly stretch himself out.

“Who… who are you?” Kevin asked. The tremours in his voice could not hide both the fear and ache as he struggled to sit up. It must have had been one hell of an experience for him, they thought as they watched how Kevin eventually gave up and dropped his head back to the pillow.

“Here… let me help you…” He walked over to Kevin and flashed a wide beam of assurance as Kevin watched at how he gestured to another man who was standing at the foot of the bed. Then the bed began to coil in bit by bit until Kevin was up to an almost sitting position. “Is that enough for you?”

“Yes, yes… that’s enough… thanks…”

“Don’t mention it…”

“Who are you?” The baldhead inspector continued to smile at him and instead of answering to his question, the inspector further instructed his assistant to pull the blinds for a better introduction. Kevin cringed the minute the sunrays penetrated through the glass panel and shone directly at his face.

“There you have it… its better now isn’t it? Bright and sunny day, don’t you think so Mr. Richardson?”

Kevin frowned. He was not sure how to react to that question. To him, he had more than enough questions lingering in his head, more relevant and important questions to be exact.

“Sure it is… you still haven’t answer my question yet. Who are you guys?”

The baldhead inspector took an empty chair and dragged it closer to the bed. For a start, he was glad that the man sitting on the bed was alive and thus, making his job easier. Secondly, Kevin sounded calmer which was important to his interrogation though he had been severely advised by the doctor in-charge not to disturb her patient unless if the patient willing to talk. Somehow, judging from Kevin’s facial expression, they knew he was more than ready to cooperate with them in their on-going case.

“Alright… let me just introduce myself, I’m Special Agent Lou and this is… my assistant Officer Markus. We are from the Criminal Department.”

“Criminal what?”

“Criminal Department.”

“Oh God…” Kevin muttered softly as he shook his head lightly.

He had been a teacher for almost a decade in one of the most prestigious high school in the big city, and always educates his students all the good values he could possibly think of. In other words, he nurtured them more than simply teaching them what was stated in the textbooks. That was the reason why he was well-liked and very approachable in school compared to other teachers.

“Mr. Richardson? Are you alright?”

“Yes, yes… I… hmmmm… I don’t understand all these…”

“None of us did. Its more like having an incomplete jigsaw puzzle you know… to have it one perfect picture, we need to dig out everything and make sure we did not miss anything out… and in this case, I mean, in your case… I hope you don’t mind us asking you a few questions about the shoot-out.”

Shoot-out?

Oh yes, how could he forget that eventful incident. The one that almost snatched his life away. The one that almost made his wife a widow and his son an orphan. Yet the most popular question remained as why did it happen.

“You ready for this Mr. Richardson?”

“Kevin.”

“What?”

“Just call me Kevin will do.”

“Well… if you say so then… Kevin. Shall we begin now?”

Kevin nodded his head in anticipation. If in class, he was used to seeing his students waiting in great anxiety each time he wanted to give out their test papers and now, he could practically see himself in their shoes. Waiting for the invigilator to give out their oral interrogations, kind of reminded him of the first time he walked in for the job interview in the school back then.

“Here we go… but before that, if you don’t feel too well, you’ve got to tell us and we’ll take a short break. You’re alright with that?”

Kevin continued nodding his head to show that he understood the instruction well as he wet his dry and cracking lips.

Special Agent Lou turned to his assistant and without a word, Officer Markus took out a small notebook from his pocket to jot down all the essential information from their key witness.

“Kevin, do you know anyone by the name of Angela Brown?”

Angela Brown? Kevin’s deep green eyes started to sparkle with concern. The name was familiar, very much familiar indeed but what was the connection between the shoot-out and his student. His forehead creased with a thousand folds as he turned to the two police officers.

“So… Kevin? You alright there? You need a drink or something?”

“No, no… its okay. I’m fine…”

“Okay… so back to my question… do you know Angela Brown?”

“Yes, I do know her. She’s one of my students.”

“From your form class or…”

“No, I teach her class Literature.”

“Generally… how’s your relationship with your students Kevin? I mean, are you personally close to them or just teach them and that’s it?”

“As a teacher, you can either just teach them or nurture them and I’m doing both so that my students will be a better person. I’m not… I’m not a super teacher but I dedicate my time for my students to come to me if they have problems. On a personal note, we are close like families.”

“All of them?”

“Not all. Only those that I teach either… from my form class or you know… my sub class… will find me and talk to me about their problems.”

“What about Angela Brown?”

“What about her?”

“Did she ever confide in you on anything? And I mean anything at all?”

“I’ve taught her class since her first year and like what I’ve mentioned, we’re all close like family. Angela is just like any other students who came to me for advices and solutions to her problems with schoolwork after school. We became closer when I was put in-charge of helping out the school debate team to get to the final round and Angela is one of the best speakers that we have in school. I spend more time with her class because of their new assignment that I gave them… nothing else.”

“So she did confide in you on her problems? Personal problem perhaps?”

“No.”

“No? Can you specify that?”

“How do you want me to specify a simple NO officer? So far she never tell me anything about her family problems if there is or any problems in school with her friends.”

“On another note, how is your relationship with her? Just Angela Brown.”

“Excuse me? My relationship with Angela? What… what do you mean by that?”

“I’m sorry if you don’t like how it sounds but we need to know what’s the relationship is like between the two of you… you know, is it between a student and a teacher, or maybe more than that-”

“Wait! Are you implying that I am having an affair with my own student Special Agent Lou?”

“Do you?” Compared to the earlier tone he used, Kevin realized that there was no sign of joking in the new tone as the officer studied his reaction to the rather personal enquiry.

“I don’t see the relevant of me answering to that question-”

“There is! In fact, that is the most fundamental question out of all the questions that I’ll be asking you later… so back to the question, do you have a relationship with Angela Brown?”

“I can’t believe this… I just can’t believe this…”

“I’m afraid you have not much choice but to believe it Kevin… I know, its hard on you and that you’ve had a bad day but trust me, everyone is going through the same thing too so… let’s just get this over with once and for all shall we? Now please… answer my question. Do you have a relationship with Angela Brown?”

“Of course no! I don’t know where the hell did you get that idea from but she is young enough to be my daughter. She is a bright student and yes, many teachers like her because of her characters but to have a relationship with her is totally absurd! It never comes across my mind to have any relationship with her apart from us having that healthy teacher and student kind of relationship. Nothing more.”

“Alright then… on 14 May, that is the day before the shoot-out, did you go over to Angela’s house?”

Without a second thought, Kevin answered the question confidently. “Yes I did.”

“Wow! You have a very good memory aren’t you? You sure you went over to her place on the 14 May?”

“I’m positive about it.”

“Now why is that so?”

“Because its my wife’s birthday and I went over to Angela’s place right after I called my wife who is not in town because she went over to Canada to visit her mom and I’ve told my wife about it.”

“Alright… why did you go to Angela’s place?”

“Because she invited me over to her place. She said they need help in the paperwork-”

“They? Who are these they?”

“Arianne, Carrie… Carla… Josh, Danny… and… Nash were there too. You can ask them if you want to.”

“Don’t worry, we’ve covered on that one. We just want to make sure that you do remember that day. So in other words, you are not alone with her in her house that day right?”

“Definitely! I’m a teacher, no matter how close I am to those students, I have a name to hold on to… but still, I don’t understand why are you asking me about her?”

“Because she is in a way involved in this shoot-out.” Kevin almost could not believe what he had just heard. Angela Brown, one of the top students who had such a bright future had a hand in the shoot-out, but why?

“What? Angela’s involved in this shoot-out? You mean she paid someone to randomly shoot at the students?”

“Not randomly at the students but mainly on you.”

“I don’t get it! Angela hired someone to shoot me?”

“Why do you insist on her paying someone to shoot you?”

“Because I remember clearly that the one who shot me was a boy. Not a girl.”

“We know that.”

“But why? I did nothing wrong to her… why?”

“I wish I have the answers for you Kevin and I’m pretty sure that Angela will have the answer too… if she is alive right now.”

“Wait…” Kevin put up his hand for the officer to stop. All the information that was given out to him came like a speeding train, too fast to be comprehended. Or maybe, it was the headache that made it difficult for him to comprehend the entire storyboard. “You’re making me confuse now… what do you mean if she is alive right now? What… what happen to her?”

“You see… from all the interrogation that we have done on most of the eyewitnesses and from this short information from you, we believed that this is a case of jealousy. Yes, Angela in involved in this case but not as someone who hired someone else to kill you, she is a victim herself. She was found dead at the stairs in the school. It was said that Angela had a fight with a male student sometime early morning yesterday before the shoot-out. It seems that he is jealous of your relationship with Angela Brown.”

“My… my relationship with Angela? Oh God… and… and this boy killed Angela too?”

“Yes… do you know a male student by the name of Sam Wisley?”

“Sam Wisley? Sam Wisley…” Kevin shut his eyes trying to recall names of his students. Even those who were not close to him will have their names registered in his memory because he was fond of keeping names of his students for future keeping. “No… I don’t think so…”

“You sure?”

“Yes… what’s the connection with this Sam boy? He was shot too?”

“No. Sam Wisley is the one who shot you.”

“Oh dear God… where is he now? You guys… you guys have arrested him?”

“More than that. Sam Wisley was dead.” Kevin could just pass out for the third time hearing that from the officer.

“Oh God… how?”

“By the time we got to the scene, Sam Wisley was found dead somewhere near the school canteen. The eyewitnesses said after he shot you and Angela, he apparently killed two other students and hurt some students before they chased him to the field. By then the police had surrounded the area and I guess, that was the time he shot himself in the mouth.”

Kevin felt sick.

He felt a wave of nauseous building up inside his stomach. It was more like having all his inner intestines tied up tight together and it was getting tighter as the image of having someone being shot from the mouth teased him in the head. The knot was so tight that he felt the urged to vomit out. Even the pungent smell of those medicines in the room did not help to ease the giddiness as he massaged his temples lightly. Too much information, he thought. Previously he has heard of a similar shooting massacre taking place at other neighbouring school but least did he expect it to happen in his school. To him personally.

“Are you alright Kevin?”

Kevin pushed Lou’s hands politely. “I’m fine… I’m fine… but I still don’t get it…”

“On what?”

“That this Sam boy… where did he get that idea that… that Angela and I were… God…”

“One of her friends told us that he thought you’re having an affair with Angela Brown and he did threaten to kill you but no one would have expected him to actually do it. The strange part is that… he is the only one who thought Angela and him are having a special relationship. What’s that term they called it again Markus?”

“An item.” Said Officer Markus when Lou flicked his fingers for helping words.

“Yeah, that’s the word. He thought they were an item. You know, more like an unrequited love kind of case. Kids nowadays… seem to channel all their energy in the wrong places, don’t you think?”

“How did he get the gun from? He bought it?”

“It’s a long story Kevin…”

“Make it short then.”

“Sam Wisley has a medical history.”

“Such as?”

“Mental problem. You see… after his mother passed away and his father was given a life imprisonment, he was sent to live with his aunt. But later his aunt has no choice but to send him away for the authorities to handle because of his mental disorder that seem to be getting worse each day. He was sent to the asylum from the age of 12 but was released a few years ago when the psychiatrists found him normal and safe to others. We have checked with the school and they said Sam was admitted through a scholarship by one of the charity foundation at his aunt’s area. He was a loner and when Angela took him as a friend, he thought his life has changed for the better but… the truth about their relationship, on how Angela really feels about him, the rejection, the anger inside him… you know reminded him of his own past.”

“Own past?”

“His father shot his mother because he thought the mother had an affair with a teacher and Sam was the main witnessed to that murder. It was then… he began to change.”

Kevin continued to massage the beak of his nose. In a way, he felt responsible for what has happened. If it was not for him, all these misunderstanding could have been avoided and most importantly of all, those deaths could have been prevented. Angela would still be alive. So was Sam. If only he could turn back time and be able to seize the day just the way he wanted it, he would change the plot of the entire story.

No doubt the terrible tragedy would be highlighted as one of the main headlines of every newspaper in the country and the news will be a yesterday’s news once a new dawn begins. The bloodstains will be washed off either by the rain or scrubbed off by the school cleaners, and the blast of the gunshot will soon be overpowered by laughter once everything had settled down but not for Kevin.

He found it hard to just simply accept the things as the way it was. To simply pretend like nothing has happened. Moreover, his job was not done yet. He still needs to go back to school to teach. He still has his responsibility towards other students but can he afford to close an eye on the tragedy that happened right at the doorstep of his own classroom?

“Kevin… are you alright? You want me to call the nurse?”

“No, no… I’m fine… have you met up with the families of those students that… that… hmmm…” Dead, he thought. Surprised at how that simple word could make him stammered like a small kid.

“Yes, we did. Everyone needs some time to get over it… and I hope you too…”

“Its not easy.”

“I know… but you know life has to go on.” Kevin smiled, more like a sardonic smile at the officer. If only he knew what it felt like to be the cause of someone else’s death, then maybe he would have a second thought of preaching how life has to go on, Kevin thought.

“Are you gentlemen done yet with my patient?” Kevin looked up and saw a tall lanky doctor intruded into their conversation.

“Yeah… yeah… in fact, we’re finishing.”

“Good, cause my patient needs to rest.”

“Sure, we’re leaving now… have a good rest Kevin. We will see you again if we need anything else from you alright.”

Kevin nodded his head. Just as the two officers were about to leave the room, Kevin held on to his wounded shoulders to call out to them.

“Officer wait!”

“Yes?”

“Just now… just now you were mentioning something about this Sam boy… hurting other students right?”

“Yeah… four of them actually… very brave kids I would say.”

“Do you know where they are now?”

“I’m here… Bri… Hell…o Brian… are you still here? Oh Brian…” A voice seemed to come in and out of his sub-conscious mind.

What had happened to him?

Was he dead?

He tried to recall what had happened and the first thing that came to his mind was the explosion. The detonation was like experiencing a blast from an explosive chemical reaction due to wrong formulas. He did not really pay much attention to it until someone ran up to him and told him about his cousin being caught in the shoot-out.

Shoot-out?

Oh yes, slowly his memory drifted back to the shoot-out episode where he remembered of seeing a boy having a strong fight with his little cousin on the floor. How he was determined to break the two of them up, unaware of the black weapon that was in possession in between of the fierce struggle. Although they were on the floor exchanging blows on each other, yet his cousin never gave up in holding tight to the boy’s hands while the others rushed their way down to get out of the school building. Despite of being pulled away by his friends, Brian refused to budge. His main concern back then was his cousin so he ran up to lend a hand.

Upon reaching the scene, Brian began to panic. The sight of the gun caught his attention as the blonde one tried to get it away from the dark-haired boy. Realizing that both of them were in a life-threatening situation, Brian thought of sprinting back to the stairways but watching that fearless look on his little cousin’s face and how he tried to seize possession of the gun encouraged him to stay behind and do something. Something that he considered as a sensible move.

He knew he was racing against time, and just like someone in a trance that possessed a power of a dozen bulls, the boy refused to give in to release the gun. The brawl on the floor finally ended when Brian was elbowed away and got shot on his left thigh. Brian was down on the floor, bleeding profusely. It seemed like only a while ago he was there trying to save his cousin but the whole wrestling scenario was too fast and the shot definitely caught them by surprised. The last image he saw before he blacked out was the smile on the boy’s face filling with an utmost sinful satisfaction as if he was in controlled of the deadly game followed by a loud gunshot.

“Nick… Nick…” He muttered softly as he tried to wake himself up from the terrible nightmare.

“Hey Brian! Stop mumbling and twitching your eyes dude! Time to wake up! You’ve been in bed all day like Sleeping Beauty… wake up now!” The high-pitch voice was familiar as it kept snapping into his already muddling head.

“Nick? Nick! Nick!”

“Hey, hey, hey! I’m here dude! I’m here! I’m here…”

“Where am I?”

“Heaven!”

“What?”

“Just kidding! You’re still here on Earth in a place called… hospital.”

“Hos… hospital?”

“Eeer... yeah… what? Were you really expecting it to be heaven?”

“Shut up!”

“Okay, I can breathe easy now… welcome back!” The scolding coming from Brian made him smiled in relieved. He recalled how freaked out he was at the sight of Brian lying in a pool of blood, motionless and thought he was dead despite of his own condition. If anything should happen to his cousin, Nick knew there was no way he could ever possibly forgive himself.

“What happen man?” Brian asked as he rubbed both his eyes and thus brought Nick back to present reality.

“Whatever that is supposed to happen… has happened Bri.”

“Thanks a lot for the explanation! That sure helps a lot!” The minute Brian carved a weak smile on his pale face, Nick felt better. Compared to Brian’s condition when he first came the day before, his cousin definitely looked better.

“Glad it helps! So you want a drink or something?”

“You… you’re getting me a drink?”

“What? You’re expecting Pamela Anderson to come and serve you?”

“Sure, why not…”

“Sure! In your dreams maybe but in the meantime, you’ll have me, the gorgeous one to get you a drink.”

“This is truly amazing! Nick Carter is getting me a drink…” Nick turned and looked at his cousin who seemed to be smiling to the air.

“And I supposed that you’re still somewhere out there? Hello Brian? Can you hear me?”

“What the fuck was that about dude! You’re hurting my ears!”

“So how’s Disneyland?”

“Huh?”

“Oh okay! That’s fine… just to make sure that you’re still here with me…”

“Right!”

“Right! You should have seen how you smile to yourself dude… you look… you look stupid, I mean… the shot was on your thigh and I thought its affecting your brain!”

“Right!”

“Right!” Nick imitated the word coming from Brian’s mouth before they both suddenly made way for silence to fill in the empty spaces.

There were just too many things to talk, to share and to unveil but most importantly how grateful they were to be alive and be able to see each other again.

“Thanks dude…” Nick said.

“Dude? Are you alright? My shot is affecting your brain now?”

“Funny!”

“I don’t think so!”

“Look… I’m… I’m just trying to thank you for saving my ass alright. For being a hero.”

“Now, look who’s talking now.”

“What?”

“You!”

“Me? What’s wrong with me?”

“Seriously Nick… how many times do I have to tell you that you’re not Superman or Batman or whatever superheroes there are out there… what if he had shot you? What if its you who is lying down here and not me… how do you think we’re all going to deal with that huh? What if I didn’t come on time? What am I supposed to tell your mom?”

“Brian?”

“What?”

“You’re sounding like my mom now!”

“Right!”

“But seriously Bri… aren’t you glad that we did something that maybe no one else could think of doing it? I mean, yeah we got shot but at the end of the day, its all about saving people.”

“Wait a second… hold it there… what do you mean with we got shot? You got shot? Where did he shoot you?”

“Oh! Did I say we get shot? I think you heard it wrongly Bri…” Nick carved out a silly smile for accidentally blurting out his true condition. Not that he tried to hide it away from his cousin but he knew his cousin too well. Getting over-worried and over-excited over little things and at that state, Brian should be spared of any other unnecessary disturbance except resting.

“Now, don’t lie to me Nick… what happen to you? Out with the truth!”

“It’s the truth Bri, I’m fine-”

“Is that a bandage?”

“What? Where?” Nick tried to cover up his arms but nothing could escape Brian’s sharp eyesight.

“What’s that on your arm?”

“Oh! You mean this - ouch! Fuck man! Damn!” Nick was putting his hands up to convince Brian that he was fine forgetting all about the stitches he had and thus generating a new spasm of pain.

“You’re hurt dude and you can still say you’re fine?” Brian asked in great concern.

“I’m fine Bri, stop worrying about me! I’m a man remember so this is no big deal alright! I just need more drugs to ease it… not to worry… just a little scratch.” Nick strived to hide the pain and put up a macho pitch despite of the sweat trailing down his cheeks for enduring the throbbing ache on his arms.

“Right! A little scratch with that constipation look on your face, you think I’m an idiot?”

“Hey! You sure can read my mind aren’t you?”

“What?”

“I’m just kidding! Of course I didn’t say that!”

“Well, you DID think that I’m an idiot right?”

“No I did not-”

“Then tell me what happen to you?” Nick gave up debating with Brian and threw his uninjured hand in the air, his usual way of giving up talking. As expected, he knew Brian would always want to get to the bottom of everything.

“Well… after he shot you… he turned to me… he tried to shoot me but I was fast to dodge his shot.”

“Fast to dodge his shot and you still have that bandage on?”

“I mean, I thought I was very fast enough to escape his shot you see… but damn! The bullet was faster than I thought, I mean… I didn’t know the bullet could be that fast! You know in CSI, the bullet doesn’t seem to really move that fast-”

“Alright Nick, so the bullet was moving fast and then what happen?”

“It passed by and kissed my skin before hitting the floor.” Nick said, gesturing with his hand on how the bullet grazed against his skin and even animated it with full of expression.

“You know Nick… you could have just mind your own business and –”

“Run away like what most of them did and let him open random shots at other students?” Nick shook his head lightly with his usual trademark, a smirk.

“But you could have just waited for help to come Nick instead of trying to be hero.”

“Its not about being hero dude, its about saving lives… what if I didn’t try to stop him and he went berserk out there and start shooting at other kids? What if he shoots at you, you know… random shooting could kill anyone… even you or myself… at least, I know… while I had him on the floor, many kids get a chance to save themselves.”

This time it was Brian who shook his head lightly at his little cousin. In a way Nick was right. To save others especially strangers you hardly knew was a noble act and Brian saluted Nick for that but certainly there were many other ways to extend a helping hand than putting himself in a huge risk. No matter what his reasons were, he deserved a smack on his head, thought Brian.

“You still don’t get it don’t you? What you have done could just press the wrong button and he could have just killed you right there and then!”

“Come on Bri! At a situation like that, you have to gamble… risking yeah but running away, hell no! As far as I’m concern… I know what I’m doing and you, what the hell were you doing there?” Nick asked as he turned to face Brian.

“Me? I was there for Pamela, of course I was there for you dude!”

“Oh! That’s really sweet of you… really, you shouldn’t have to. I know how to take care of myself.”

“Right! The last time you tried to be a hero and saved an old lady from being robbed, what did you get? Black eye and bruises on your face and what did I get? Lectures from my mom and your mom, why? Because I should be helping you out instead of running away to get help.”

“Then you can just tell my mom that her brave son, Nick Carter fights fiercely to save others-”

“Right!”

“You should be proud to have a brave cousin like me Bri… don’t you feel flattered to have reporters coming after us, interviewing us, have our pictures on papers… then the school giving out Medals of Bravery…”

“You know what Nick?”

“What?”

“You should be glad that you’re still alive and breathing right now, so stop talking about those reporters! You have someone else who is even more important to answer to.”

“Oh really? Who? The school journalist?”

“Its your mom duh!” Brian said as he rolled his eyes in disbelief while his cousin smiled sheepishly, scratching his cheeks.

“Now, that’s not even in the zip code of funny! Oh well… try harder next time!” Nick said sarcastically.

“You have any idea why he’s… you know… shooting at everyone? And why are you on the floor with him? Are you… in some kind of a trouble that I’m unaware of?” Brian raised his eyebrows at Nick, the same gestured his mother gave each time she suspected him of creating problem in school and Nick hated that look.

“Hey! Don’t give me that look alright! Not my fault! I’m just trying to help.”

“Help who?”

“That son of a gun came to my class and shot at my teacher… then he ran off to the stairs and he let out another shot… I’m not sure who got it or maybe he was just trying to scare me off but I’m not that easily threatened so I went after him. I know I must stop him and man! You should have seen how I tripped him over and slammed him down and I-”

“I can’t believe you man… you’re on the verge of getting killed and you’re so excited about it?”

“When you are determine to save others, you won’t think of getting yourself killed. Furthermore, I’m here, alive and dandy sharing this room with you… and dude, try to imagine the headlines as “The school heroes led by Nick Carter saving his schoolmates from random shooting massacre. Wow… amazing huh? Looks like I need to start working on my signatures… you know fans nowadays, they only want something nice and perfect.”

“Looks like I didn’t call you an attention whore for nothing huh?”

“Hey! Mind your words dude! There’re many underage kids around here.”

“Why? Since when did you ever be so conscious with people around you?”

“Since the day Nick Carter saved the day!”

“You’re watching too much TV now. So anyway… what happen to that fella? Did they manage to get him?”

“No.”

“No? You mean he’s still at the large?”

“Worst than that.”

“What?”

“Make a guess.”

“Honestly Nick, I am really and I really mean it when I said I am really not in a good state of mind to play guessing, so out with it dude!”

“You’re such a wet blanket Bri! Come on, just one shot! Make a guess what happen to him.” Insisted Nick.

“What? He died or something?”

“Bingo!” Brian’s mouth was gaping. “And now… make a guess how he died?”

“Not again!”

“Come on, this is the best part!”

“Nick, when I get out of this place and when my thigh is perfectly fine for some exercising please remind me to kick your ass! Now, out with it!”

“Fine! Where’s the love now…” Nick muttered as he smirked at Brian. He dragged the chair closer to Brian as if he was at the edge of sharing the most confidential information ever with his cousin. “He shot himself in the mouth.”

“What?”

“See! I knew it! I knew you’re gonna be blown away by it! Gruesome huh? You know I really thought it only happens in movies but man! This is for real! He actually shot himself in the mouth! If I had chased him, maybe I could have seen it myself, with my two own eyes!”

Brian took a deep breath, deeper than the previous one seeing the excitement on Nick’s face. Weird how Nick could still find himself smiling with the bandage on his shoulders. How the way the shooter killed himself amused him or rather fascinated him so much. Yet, Brian felt relieved watching the craziness because it proved that his little brother was in good shape and better condition than his.

“Who’s that guy?” Brian asked, pointing at the other end of the room.

“I don’t know… but he’s from our school. Not sure which class but the other one on bed, he’s from the Student Council.”

“He was involved in the shoot-out too?”

“Yeah, both of them. Speaking of which… I haven’t thank those two guys for saving me… or else I wouldn’t be here keeping you accompany right now.”

“So what are you waiting for?”

“Fine! I’m going now… you stay here.”

“Right! Like as if I can move at all!”

---

Bit by bit, he dragged himself up on his bed. The long night sleep has made his throat all dried up. It was like having someone stretching his throat with hairdryer. Once in a while, he would hiss in pain as he moved his leg. He was not sure when it hit him because he was too engrossed in the struggle and chasing after the shooter. The chase had probably made him oblivious to the pain and if it was not for the sticky fluid that kept dripping on the concrete floor from his shoes, he would have no clue that he had been hit.

He raised his head slightly higher to see if there would be anyone out there to help him but so far, everyone was busy tending to their own business. Then he turned back to the side table. It looked so close from where he was and yet when he stretched his hands out for the glass it proved to be quite a distant away. The shot must have affected his eyesight, he thought as he dropped his head back to the pillow. While shutting both his eyes, his hands were like tentacles searching for the remote control to call for assistance.

“You alright there bro?” He opened up his eyes and looked up. A small recognizable figure with one of his hands bandaged and slung across his chest walking towards him.

“I… hmmmm… I…” His voice was caught among the saliva and small coughing but his eyes were on the glass hoping that whoever it was, would get the signal.

“You want a drink?”

He nodded his head lightly as he swallowed his saliva down his sultry throat. His eyes shone bright with tons of appreciation.

“Here… let me help you.” The kind stranger poured warm water into that clear glass and handed it over to his ward mate.

He took the glass and sipped a few times, appreciating every single drop of it as the water soothed down his throat. Everything seemed surreal. The incident looked pretty much like one of those stunts in those action pact movies and even the news on the shooting massacre happening at their neighbouring school did not affect or leave much impact. Maybe the only difference was that, in this case, he was going through it himself.

“Thanks…” He said handing over the glass to the boy standing next to his bed.

“Not a problem!”

“You look very familiar…”

“I do? Man! Everyone keeps saying that! Even some of the nurses here!”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, they said I look like that… what’s the chap’s name again… gosh! I thought I had it just now… AJ, yeah, that AJ guy from the Backstreet Boys or something… you know that group?”

“Not really sure-”

“Its okay! Not that it really matters but if they are popular, man! I’m so lucky to look like a celebrity! Maybe its something to do with our names.”

Howie smiled at the kind and friendly stranger who appeared to be gloating and floating away in the air. AJ. So his name was AJ, thought Howie as he nodded his head as if he was answering to his own enquiry.

“You’re Alexander James McLean right?”

“Wow! You sure can remember my full name? Dude… you’re my stalker or what?”

“I… hmmm… not wanting to sound rude to you but… I always see you in school.”


“Of course! We’re from the same school so definitely you’ve seen me, if not everyday, you’re bound to see me every week.” He said with a chuckle.

“Well… actually not sure if you recognize me but you’re the one who always come for DC right? Detention Class? But strange that we hardly talk to each other in school.” The smile on AJ’s face was instantly replaced with a raised of his eyebrows, and that was enough to trap Howie in his own guilt-trip. What a way to thank the kind soul for saving and helping him, he thought. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to… I mean…”

“Don’t be sorry! I’m used to those DC thingy! No friggin big deal! What can I say when teachers seem to adore me a lot, you know, being their favourite student of all time is not easy afterall.” Instead of fuming with embarrassment and walked away, AJ was more relaxed as he helped himself to the empty chair facing Howie’s side bed.

“Sure… I can see that. By the way, I’m Howard… Howard Dorough, but you can just call me Howie or D.”

“Peace to see you! I’m… well, you already know my name right? Ayway, girls call me Bonnie, family calls me Jay, friends call me AJ, and famous people call me Johnny-No-Name… so pick your choice, but strictly no Alex alright!” He said, stretching his free hand out for a warmth handshake.

“Pleasure to meet you too! I think I’ll go with Jay or AJ.” Howie reciprocated the handshake with a warmth and grip.

“Ditto that!”

“So, how’s your hand?” Howie asked as he pointed to the bandage.

“This? Not as bad as yours. At least I can walk.” AJ was right.

Howie let out a weak smile and nodded his head in agreement before he turned his attention back to his bandaged foot.

“Yeah, I guess its only a foot huh… but it feels like I’ve lost a leg. I almost I was… going to die.”

“Me too but…”

“But what?”

“They’re not as lucky…”

“They?” Howie strained his eyes at AJ, looking confused and sorry for whatever he was about to say.

“My friends… who got shot.”

“I’m sorry-”

“Don’t be! Its not like you’re the one who killed them! It’s that son of a bitch! He killed them! And he almost killed us!” The tone in AJ’s voice began to change. The jovial tenor suddenly became distressed. The low monotone of his voice had developed into one high-pitch note. The punch in his voice indicated his anger and resentment but far from his expression, Howie knew AJ was trying to hide and control his anger.

Perhaps AJ, himself knew there was no point venting it out on others. They were innocent and in this case, both of them were victims, just like those casualties. AJ admitted that he has never been so emotional in his life before. Not even when his father left him. To him, that was an incident not worth to think about. He was very young back then and the rebellious side of him had made him so immune with the reality of leading a life without a father. So far he has been doing great in going through that phase but when he witnessed how an innocent life was snatched away maliciously, he felt grateful to be alive.

The moment he saw bodies of his innocent friends being carried to the morgue, he felt thankful to be able to breathe and see his mother again. When he was interrogated by the two police officers and was informed of another victim battling to survive because of the misunderstanding, he felt indebted to the boy who was lying on the bed for saving his life.

“Jay? Jay?”

“Huh?”

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, yeah… I’m fine… sorry…”

“Sorry? What for?”

“I didn’t mean to… you know… shout at you or anything like that… its just that… hmmm…”

“Its okay. I guess everyone has the right to be angry right now, especially with what had happened. You’ve lost your friends and that’s not something easy to deal with.”

“I just find it so stupid! I mean… this shooting thingy… is just plain stupid, don’t you think?”

“It is Jay.”

“I should have done something yesterday.”

“Done something? What do you mean?”

AJ wet his lips and forced his saliva down his throat. The more he thought of it, the more he blamed himself for not doing anything to salvage the whole situation.

“I was there D.”

“There? Where?”

“I was there when… when that son of a bitch threatened to kill them but I… I just brushed it off thinking that he’s just a small freak that never creates any problem so… killing them would be the last thing he would ever brave enough to do but I was wrong. I took his words for granted. If only… if only I had taken it seriously… then maybe we wouldn’t be here right now. Its all my fault… my fault.”

Howie wished he could have been more comforting to his new friend but he was not sure what else to say. The grieving emotion on AJ’s face was obvious and being an observer, he could read the lad’s facial expression and remorseful was first word that struck his mind.

He could have said it was not AJ’s fault and that everything happened for a reason but realized that he was NOT AJ and can never feel the guilt pricking his conscious. He could have said to AJ to move on and stop blaming himself but he was NOT in AJ’s shoes to feel what it felt like to have such burden of holding on the truth where you could have done something to stop it.

Every word did not seem to come out right at the back of his head. Afterall, that was just not the right time to get everything messed up again.

“Jay… I don’t know if I can say this but listen to me… don’t be so hard on yourself… nobody, and I mean nobody would have seen it coming right? Even if its me who was there and listen to his threat, I doubt I would do anything about it because with what has happened to St. Joseph has tighten up the school’s security and I’m sure everyone learnt something from that incident so… who would have thought its going to happen in our school right?”

“Maybe… and maybe I could have saved us all.”

“That’s the keyword, maybe. Maybe you could save the day and maybe not. Maybe he has decided to strike yesterday and maybe not… maybe he thought he could escape from getting punished, thinking that no one dare enough to stop him but we were there, you were there to stop him as well and you were there to see how it ends.”

“Yeah, maybe if he had used more of his upper brain then we all would have probably in school right now. Those kids will still be alive, you wouldn’t be lying in bed with your foot getting shot, and everyone will be living happily ever after…” AJ cracked a smile in between of his self-reproached.

“That happens quite a lot especially when people tend to act in anger. Acting emotionally instead of rationally is equivalent to more disastrous to other innocent people. By the way… do you know that guy? The one who’s… shooting around?”

“Not me, but Anne.”

“Anne?”

“She’s my classmate and… she’s one of the victims. Remember when we tried to run after that son of bitch and he tripped over a body at the stairs?” Howie nodded his head. The incident remained vividly afresh in his mind, so fresh that he could even play it all over again. How he was puzzled seeing other students running and stomping out for their lives, but it was the loud commotion coming from the top floor that caught his attention. He was on his way up when he saw a body facing down in a pool of blood on the stairs but that did not deter him from going up. There, he saw a boy being shot and he was bleeding profusely. His strong sense of responsibility in helping others had conquered all his fears and his own safety.

He knew he had to act fast in order to save another one from being killed. Without thinking twice, he charged at the shooter only to find another student leaping on the same target. It was AJ.

“D? D?”

“Huh? What?”

“You’re alright?” This time it was Howie who got himself into deep reflection of what had happened.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. So it was her body on the stairs?”

“Yes. That was her.”

“She looked very familiar.”

“She’s Angela Brown if you want to know.”

“Angela Brown? One of the top student and one of the school’s best speaker in the debate team?”

“You know her?”

“She’s very popular in school… definitely everyone knows her!”

“Yeah, but she’s one humble pie.”

“I agree on that one. So… they have a relationship problem?”

“Who?”

“Angela and that guy?”

“You see, that’s the strange part. I’ve known Angela for almost six years and we’re like brother and sister and so far, we all know they have nothing going on but that ass insisted that they were an item.”

“Then why didn’t she tell him that?”

“She did but she will always ended up having those bruises and knowing that she has soft heart so he’s making use of that against her but not Josh.”

“Josh? Who is this Josh?”

“Our close friend, three of us are very close… but not anymore… now, I’m alone.”

“You mean…”

“Yeah, Josh is one of those who didn’t make it from the shoot-out.”

“Wow… I don’t know how you can handle this but come to think of it again… this is nuts!” Howie exclaimed in disbelieved.

“Oh yes it is… trust me, I’m having a tough time to actually absorbing the fact that number one, I’m still alive. Number two, that I’m still sane.” Then they both broke into short laugh.

“You should go and get some sleep Jay.”

“Sleep? I’m getting too phobia to sleep now. You know, you may never know what is going to happen the moment you close your eyes.”

Howie understood what he meant. He had difficulty in getting back to sleep as well. Apart from enjoying that chat with AJ, image of the shoot-out haunted him too. The tragic happened during the daytime when everyone was active in school and yet they did not see it coming so when he tried to shut his eyes, he could sense a presence watching him and waiting to release the trigger. It was more of being traumatized than just a plain phobia, he thought to himself.

“So you know… anyone else getting hurt?”

“Those two and a teacher.”

Howie stationed his attention to the other corner of the room where the two blonde boys were talking to each other. He recognized them instantaneously. They were in the school basketball team but how were they involved in the shoot-out? They too had issued with the shooter? Or were they just like them, trying to be heroes to help the others?

“You were mentioning a teacher? You know who?”

“No idea but the officer said, he’s in pretty bad shape.”

“He?”

“Yeah… I think it must be him. That ass thought he’s having an affair with Anne.”

“And does this he has a name since you know who that guy is referring to?”

“Yeah, its –”

“Hi!”

Both AJ and Howie looked up and saw one of the blondes walking up closer to Howie’s bed.

“Hi!” They greeted in unison.

“I’m Nick… and that’s my cousin, Brian.” Nick said as he pointed politely to Brian.

Howie nodded his head to Brian and back to Nick in response to the introduction while AJ waved proudly with his free hand.

“I’m Howie.”

“And I’m Jay, AJ. You were in the basketball team right?”

“Yeah-”

“Well, the team sucks alright! The last time I wanted to join, the coach actually failed me just because I can’t do the slam the dunk, or whatever you called it!” Nick blew his bang with a smile.

“Well, its his loss then.” Nick continued shyly.

“Sure it is!” AJ replied extending his hands out for a handshake.

“Hope I’m not interrupting you guys…”

“No, no… we were just chatting.”

“Yeah, we were just chatting.” Supported AJ.

“Great! I mean… I won’t take much of your time, I actually I… I want to thank you both.”

“Thank us?” Asked Howie looking puzzled.

“For saving my life, our lives actually. If its not for you guys, I guess I won’t be here right now and my cousin would be dead by then.”

“Well… welcome aboard dude!” AJ said with a huge grin.

“What?”

“It means we’re all boarding the same boat. We’re here, alive because of one another.” Howie continued.

“And don’t forget, thanks to that ass that we’re even here in the first place!”

“Come on Jay… aren’t you glad that at least we’re still breathing right now? Talking for the first time with one another?” Howie was right as the three of them nodded their heads in agreement.

“Yeah, you’re right D! We’re like the unlikely heroes of the school.”

Heroes? Nick smiled at the mention of that word. He had just talked to Brian about them being heroes of the day, saving people, saving lives but Brian would always be the wet blanket and burst all those bubbles floating above his head. Not that he had anything against his cousin, besides he certainly had to thank Brian for always bringing his feet back to the ground.

“So he managed to shoot you?” Howie asked.

“Nah… it passed by and grazed my skin… only a few stitches, compared to my cousin, I’m considered very lucky. He shot you as well?”

“Yeah, it hit my foot when we chased after him and the weirdly enough, I didn’t even notice it at first.”

“Your cousin looks like he got it bad!” AJ said.

“A shot on his thigh, so you can imagine how bad it is.”

“But anyway, you’re brave kiddo! Credit for that! You actually tried to stop that lunatic all by yourself, you must be crazy!” This time, AJ sounded with full admiration.

“Who told you that?”

“Hey! Everyone was screaming at that time, the whole place was in total chaos and people were running up to me saying Nick is holding the shooter, so that’s where I got to know about the shoot-out.”

“Can’t help it people! He shot my teacher!”

“Wait! He what?” AJ exclaimed, almost could not believe what he had heard. A teacher has been shot? Does that mean Sam really execute what he said?

“He shot my teacher dude! I can’t just run away and let him get off easily!”

“Who’s your teacher?” Howie asked.

“Mr. Richardson.” AJ’s eyes became wider as he turned slowly to Howie.

“D, remember earlier on when I told you about this one particular teacher that the ass thought having an affair with Anne?”

“Yeah, I remember that!”

“Well… looks like he got him.”

“You mean… its him?”

“Yeah, its him.”

“So, he is the one you’re talking about?”

“Affirmative! Its him.”

“Oh wait! Wait a second… what are you two talking about? Who is this he? And what does this he has anything to do with this thing?” Nick asked anxiously, hoping for more explanation rather than having “he” and “him” all over the places.

“It’s a long story Nick… trust me… you have all day to hear that but now… I think I want to visit my teacher.”

“Your teacher got shot too?’ Nick asked innocently.

“No, no… its more like our teacher Nick!”

“Gosh Jay! A moment you’re talking about he, him, then comes your teacher and now you’re telling me about our teacher… you’re confusing me man!”

“I know, I know… I find it hard to believe too, but I tell you what? You come with me and I’ll tell you everything on the way there alright?” Nick nodded his head.

The moment Nick and AJ stepped out of the room, the environment was totally different. The air was still and silent became their immediate companion. Without saying a word, they both knew just how much they hated the silent and wished Nick and AJ were there, it did not matter if they both tried to make up those stupid jokes or silly riddles. All they wanted was to get away from that silent.

“Brian?”

“Yeah?”

“Hey… I’m Howie!”

“Nice to… hear you!” Chuckled Howie as he stared at the ceiling and he could hear soft chuckles coming from Brian’s side as well.

“Yeah, same here…”

“You… you wanna talk?” Then he heard Brian letting out further soft chuckles as if something was tickling him on the bed. “Brian?”

“Sorry Howie. I just find it funny.”

“Yeah, talking while you stare the ceiling, it looks pretty funny to me too!”

“Not that!”

“What is?”

“Cause I was about to ask the same thing to you.” Continued Brian with soft giggles.