December 22, 2007

Nick Carter and his girlfriend of just under a year, Stephanie Copeland, were walking through a crowded mall right before Christmas.  They approached the middle of the mall where there was a mall Santa.  “Oh, Nick.  Let’s get a picture of us with Santa.”

“Steph, can’t we just get what we came here for and go home?”

“Oh, where is your Christmas spirit?”

“I don’t have any.”

“Well, we’re going to change that.”  She grabbed Nick’s hand and dragged him toward the line for pictures with Santa.

“How is a picture with someone dressed like Santa going to change anything?”

The young girl in line in front of them turned around.  “He’s the real Santa.”

Nick, having always been around small kids, knew that he had to pretend that Santa was real.  “Santa is at the North Pole preparing for Christmas Eve.  He has a lot of work in the next couple days.  So this Santa is one of the real Santa’s helpers.”  The young girl thought about it and then turned back around.  Stephanie smiled at Nick.  “What?”

“I thought for sure that you were going to ruin that girl’s Christmas because of your own Christmas bitterness.”

“Can we please just go get a gift for your parents so we can get out of here?”

“After we get our picture.  It’s almost our turn.”  She paused for a minute.  “You know, Santa really exists.”

“Aren’t you a little old to believe in Santa.”

“You’re never too old to believe in Santa.”  Nick rolled his eyes, but stayed silent.

Soon, it was their turn to have their picture taken.  Nick stepped to the side as Stephanie went to sit on Santa’s lap.   She got confused when she saw that Nick wasn’t with her.  “Nickolas, get over here.”  Nick just stood there.  “One minute.”  She said and then stood up.  She went over to Nick and grabbed his hand, pulling him over to Santa.

Nick relented and went to get his picture taken with his girlfriend.  The photographer looked through her lens to take the picture.  She then straightened up and looked at Nick.  “You are going to smile aren’t you?”

Stephanie looked at him.  “Nick, please?”

He sighed.  “Fine.”

The photographer looked through the lens once again.  “Much better.”  She took the picture.  They waited for their picture and Nick paid for two copies.

Stephanie linked her arm in Nick’s and leaned into him.  She kissed his cheek.  “Thank you.”  Nick just looked at her silently.  She sighed.  “Why do you hate Christmas so much?”

“The malls are crowded with angry mobs, especially when a customer doesn’t get their way.  It’s a lot of unnecessary work.  And besides, I don’t have any good memories of Christmas.”

“What about before your parents died?”

“I was too young to remember.  My last Christmas with my parents was when I was four.”

“When did you stop believing in Santa?”

He sat on a bench and pulled Stephanie down with him.  “When I was five.  I had no living relatives, so I was put in an orphanage.  I didn’t like it there and I knew my parents weren’t coming back, so the only thing I wanted from Santa that year was a new family.  The orphanage used to give one gift to each child for Christmas. That was the only gift I got, nothing from Santa, and no family.  I spent the next 5 years in that orphanage.  Then when I was finally adopted when I was 10, I thought Christmas would get better.  But they weren’t my real family and I miss my parents the most around Christmas.  And when I moved out, I stopped even going to their house for Christmas.  The past few years, I’ve been alone on Christmas.”

“No offense Nick, but it was your fault that you were alone for Christmas the past few years.  I’m sure they consider you part of the family…”

“They do, it’s just…”

“Christmas Eve, we’re going to your family.  Christmas day, we’re going to mine.  So that means, we now need two gifts.”  Stephanie said excitedly.  Nick groaned.  “Don’t even think about complaining.  This is our first Christmas together and by the end of this holiday season you’ll have some Christmas spirit.”

“I wouldn’t count on that.”

The mall Santa, who was apparently on a break, came over carrying a Polaroid camera.  “You’re under the mistletoe.”

“What’s your point?”

“Nickolas, stop.”

“Kiss her.”

Nick huffed in frustration and stood up and walked away.  Stephanie sighed as he walked away.  “He doesn’t like Christmas.  Excuse me.”  Stephanie stood up and ran off in the direction that Nick stalked off in.  When she didn’t find him in the mall she went out to the car.  She found him sitting in the passenger seat.  She opened the driver side door and got in.  She wanted to say something but knew that there was nothing she could say at the moment.  She sighed and started the car.

Nick looked at her when he heard the car start.  “I thought you were going to continue to shop.”

“I will, but first, I have to take the Grinch home.”  Nick kept his gaze on her for a few moments before looking away.  He knew that she was upset about how he was acting and that she was probably accurate in calling him the Grinch, but it still stung that his girlfriend insulted him.  When he looked away, she realized that she had hurt his feelings.   “Nick, I’m sorry.”

“No.  You’re right.  Let’s go finish you’re shopping.  I’ll be good.  I promise.” 

She watched Nick get out of the car.  She knew that she had really hurt Nick even though he was hiding it.  She got out of the car and hugged him.  “I know my comment hurt you.  I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry.  It’s not what you said that hurt.  It hurt because…because, well, because it’s true.  The Grinch hated Christmas, and he tried to ruin Christmas for The Who’s and that’s what I did to you.  Just because I hate Christmas doesn’t give me the right to ruin it for you.  I’m sorry.”

Stephanie smiled at him.  “You know, the Grinch learned to love Christmas.  There’s still some hope for you.”

“I don’t know.  Can’t we just get what you need to get and not discuss my lack of Christmas spirit?” 

Stephanie nodded.  “Fair enough.  But we will have to discuss this later.  Now, I figured we’d go to your family early Christmas Eve.  Then we’ll go to my parents’ right after dinner, that way we can partake in the Christmas tradition of decorating the tree.  We’ll sleep there and then wake up bright and early for Christmas morning.  We’ll open gifts and then you get to meet the rest of my family.”

“Are you sure I should be with your family on Christmas.”

“Sure, why not?”

“I managed to offend you with my hate of Christmas.  Do you really think it wise to put me in the midst of a family Christmas?  I don’t even think we should go to my family.”

“Nick, I’m sure your family would like to see you.”

“It’s not that they don’t see me.  I just don’t go there for Christmas so that I don’t ruin it for everyone else.”

They walked around the mall so that Stephanie could search for the perfect gift.  Nick smiled to himself when she said that she had everything she wanted to get.  On the way out of the mall, Stephanie stopped.  Nick turned to look at her.  “Why’d you stop?”

“I want to go in here.”  She said and began moving toward the entrance to the DVD store that was in the mall.”

“What do you need here? “

“You’ll see.”  She walked along the DVD’s that were prominently displayed.  Nick followed close to her and almost tripped over her when she stopped short to look at the selection in front of her.  Nick followed her gaze to realize that they were standing in the Christmas movie section.  “Oh, there it is.”  She reached out and grabbed a copy of Miracle on 34th Street.  Nick knew the story of Miracle on 34th Street, after all, who didn’t.  “Maybe this will help you.  After all, Kris Kringle got Susan to believe in Santa Claus.”

“Maybe, but I’m not six.”

“That’s your problem.”

“What that I’m not six?”

“No, that you let yourself lose your childhood beliefs.   You lost sight of what Christmas is really about.”

“I know what Christmas is about.  It’s about spending time with your family.  That has nothing to do with believing or not believing in Santa.”

“Santa is more than a jolly old man who delivers gifts.  He’s a symbol of Christmas.  By not believing in him, you don’t believe in Christmas.”

“If we’re done, can we please just go?”

Stephanie nodded.  She knew that if she continued to push the subject they’d end up in an awkward silence again.  They left the mall.

~*~

 

December 24, 2007

The door opened.  “Stephanie, Welcome home.”  Carol, Stephanie’s mother, said.

“Hi Mom.”  She said and hugged her mother.

She noticed Nick standing awkwardly on the porch behind her daughter.  “And who do we have here?”

“Oh.  Mom, this is my boyfriend Nick.”

Nick held out his hand.  He was shocked when her mother grabbed his hand and pulled him in for a hug.  “Merry Christmas Nick.”

“Uh,  yeah.  Same to you.”

“Well, come in.”

Carol let them in and then  pulled Stephanie aside.  “Is he okay?”

“Yeah why?”

“Well, he seemed a little, distant when I said Merry Christmas.”

“He doesn’t like Christmas.  I forced him to come today.”

“You forced him?”

“Yeah.  I want to see if I change his mind about Christmas.”

Carol smiled.  “I have a phone call to make.  Take Nick into the living room.  We’re putting our tree up, as per tradition.”

“Great.  I was hoping we left his family early enough.”

“Oh, you’re coming from his family.  That’s nice.”

“Mom, he hasn’t been to his family’s Christmas since he moved out.”

“Whoa, he is far gone isn’t he?” 

Stephanie nodded.  She walked over to Nick and linked her arm with his.  “Are you ready to meet the rest of my family?”

Nick smiled down at her.  “I might as well.  I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.”

Stephanie smiled at him and led him into the living room where her father, sister and brother were decorating the Christmas tree.  After the introductions, Stephanie joined in on decorating the tree while Nick sat on the couch. 

Paul, Stephanie’s father, looked over to Nick who was sitting on the couch while the rest of them decorated the tree.  “You’re welcome to join in you know.”

“Um, well, I’m not really a big fan of Christmas.  I don’t mind sitting here while your family enjoys your Christmas.”

Paul wasn’t sure what to say, so he turned back to his tree and continued decorating the tree with his family.

Once the tree was decorated, Stephanie sat on Nick’s lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.  He smiled at her and leaned in to kiss her softly.

Paul and Carol were watching the young couple interact.  “I like him.”  Paul said as he wrapped his arm around Carol’s waist.

“I’m not sure they’re so good for each other.  I mean, he seems to have a deep hatred for her favorite holiday.”

“Maybe, but I’m sure he has his reasons to dislike this holiday.  And look at them.  Don’t they remind you of us when we were that age?”

Carol smiled.  “You’re right.  They do.  She seems to really like him too.”

“I think she loves him.”

Back on the couch, Stephanie was still on Nick’s lap.  “I was thinking, that maybe we should go home tonight.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Well, I feel bad that you aren’t enjoying yourself.”

“Listen, I promised you that I would come with you for Christmas.  I’m not going to ruin Christmas for you.”

“Thank you Nick.”

Paul finally spoke up.  “I think it’s time for the tradition of opening one gift on Christmas Eve.”

Stephanie looked up at that moment.  “Oh, Dad, maybe we shouldn’t do that this year.”

“What? Why not?”

“Well…”  She looked at Nick and he immediately knew why she was trying to stop their Christmas Eve tradition.”

“Steph, no.  Don’t stop your traditions on account of me.”

“I know you don’t like Christmas and I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“I might not like Christmas, but this is your tradition.  If I start to feel too uncomfortable, then I can always go for a walk.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure.  Now, go get a gift that you want to open.”

Stephanie smiled at Nick and got on the floor by the Christmas tree to open her one gift.

About a half hour later, wrapping paper littered the floor and Nick smiled slightly as his girlfriend’s family talked amiably about the presents they just opened.  He looked down as he began to wish that his parents didn’t die in that accident back in 1985 as he did every Christmas since his first Christmas without his parents.  He blinked and felt tears prick the back of his eyes.  He stood up and went to go sit on the front porch.

Stephanie stood up and followed him.  “Are you okay Nick?”

Nick looked up.  “Yeah.  I just needed some fresh air.

Stephanie didn’t realize it, but Paul had followed her and was standing behind the screen door as Stephanie talked to Nick.  “Nick, I’m sure your parents wouldn’t want you to be miserable on Christmas.”  Stephanie said, trying to comfort him.

“I know.  I always miss them the most at Christmas time.  I guess because I always think about how different everything would be if they hadn’t died.  And that is why Christmas is so hard for me.  And over the years, I just got bitter about it.”  Stephanie didn’t know what to say.  She felt the only way she would be able to comfort him was to just stay silent while hugging him.  After a few minutes Nick spoke up again.  “I’m okay now.  Let’s go back in.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.  Let’s go back inside.”

They walked back into the living room.  Nick sat back down on the couch and pulled Stephanie down onto his lap, making her giggle at the movement.

Paul was sitting on the recliner when Nick and Stephanie walked back into the room.  “You know, I think we missed one.”

Stephanie looked over at her father.  “What do you mean?  We all opened our one gift.”

Paul stood up and picked up a wrapped gift.  “We did all open our one gift.  But Nick didn’t.”

Nick looked at his girlfriend’s father with a very confused look.  “How could you possibly have a gift for me?  You didn’t even know that I was coming.”

“Don’t ask questions Nick.  Just accept it.”

Nick cautiously took the gift that Paul was handing him.  “Uh thanks.”  Nick was still very confused, but he started to open the gift anyway.  He looked down at the gift in his hand after the wrapping was off.  He was speechless.  He had no idea how they got a picture of him with his parents from the Christmas before his parents’ death.  He looked up in shock.  “How did you get this picture?”

Stephanie smiled at Nick.  “Did I forget to mention that my dad is Santa Claus?”

“What?  That’s impossible.  Santa Claus doesn’t exist.”

“I assure you that he does exist and I’m him.  I was able to get that picture through Christmas magic.”

“Yeah right.  How did you really get it?”

Paul smiled and without warning several gifts appeared under the tree.  Nick looked at the tree in shock.  “We tried to tell you.”

“You’re really Santa Claus aren’t you?”

“Yes I am.”

Nick was speechless.

~*~

December 25, 2007

Nick opened his eyes on Christmas morning and smiled as he gazed into Stephanie’s eyes.  “Merry Christmas Nicky.”

“Merry Christmas Steph.”

Stephanie’s jaw dropped.  After the shock wore off, her shocked expression turned into a smile.  “You said it.”

“Yeah, I guess I did.”

“And you said it couldn’t be done.”

“That what couldn’t be done?”

“That you’d learn to love Christmas.”

“Well, I’m not so sure I can say that I love Christmas but I can say that this is the first time in 22 years that I didn’t wake up dreading the day.”

“Well, it’s a start.”

“Yeah, I guess it is.”  Stephanie smiled.  “Why are you smiling?”

“Do you still think I’m too old to believe in Santa Claus?”

It was Nick’s turn to smile.  “You’re never too old to believe in Santa Claus.”