“Jenn, listen to me. I’m sorry. I just forgot.” I said as I followed Jenn down the stairs.
“Aj sorry isn’t working this time. I know you are busy, I get that. I really do, but since I moved in I haven’t seen you more than a few hours a day.” Jenn said as she stopped in the living room. She took a deep breath and said the words I never wanted her to say, “I think we need a break.” I watched her she made her way toward the front door.
“Baby, please. I promise I’ll change. Hell I’ll even work from home.” I pleaded with her, “Jenn just stay, we can work it out.” I watched her shake her head as she closed the door. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak. I stood there tears falling silently down my face as I heard her leave.

I jumped as my cell phone rang. “Hello.” my voice was laced with tears, I knew I sounded horrible.

“Jenn?! What’s wrong?” Melissa knew me too well. She knew when I was crying.

“Nothing,” I started but she stopped me.

“Bull, now tell me what’s wrong?”

“I left Aj.”

“YOU DID WHAT?! Why?! Oh lord. Where are you?”

“Which one do you want me to answer first?” I said with a sad little laugh.

“God, never mind where are you?”

“Heading toward the airport.”

“Okay where are you going?” She asked I could hear her rummaging through something.

“Home,” I said meaning Alabama.

“No, come here. Please.”

“Melissa, you have enough going on with you.” She was getting married to Nick in just a few months and I knew she had enough on her plate.

“Jennifer, you introduced me to Nick. I wanted you to come and help me with everything anyway. Please.”

“Fine, I’m going to see what kinda flight I can get.”

“Actually, Nick’s taking care of that now.” Melissa said.

“What?” I knew I didn’t hear her right.

“Nick has you a flight in about 3 hours. That should give you enough time to get something to eat and get checked in.”

“Melissa! I could handle that on my own.” I heard the phone being moved and I waited.

“Hey, I know you can. But it’s the least I can do to thank you for being friends with Mel.” Nick said his voice showing he was grinning.

“Fine, how much money do I need to transfer to my checking account?” I asked knowing I had plenty in my savings to pay for the flight.

“Nothing I told you I took care of it all.”

“Ohhhh no. I’m not-“ Nick cut me off.

“Jennifer. I said I took care of it.” Nick’s voice was firm and I wasn’t in the mood to fight anymore.

“Fine. Whatever.” I said with a sigh.

“Okay then, here is Melissa. Bye.”

“Bye.”

“Hey.” Melissa said as she got back on the phone.

“Your man is too bossy.” I said with a laugh.

“I know and I love it.” I just rolled my eyes.

“Okay, anyway listen traffic is getting crazy so I’m going to get off here before I get in trouble.” I said as a black SUV swerved in front of me.

“Okay be careful, Nick and I will pick you up at the airport. Okay?”

“Okay bye.”

“Bye.” I clicked the phone off and flipped it shut. I sighed and tried to keep my thoughts from running back to Aj. I was doubting my decision. Did I do what was right? What if it is over? Should I have stayed, what if I loose him forever? I loved him so much, my mind was in overdrive as I made my way to the airport.

I groaned quietly as I stood from my seat. I couldn’t help the automatic stretch that ripped through my body. God it felt good to be standing after a long flight. I pulled my bag from the overhead storage and made my way out of the plane. As I walked down the ramp I turned my phone back on and winced as the light started flashing letting me know I had messages. “I wonder from who.” I said to myself as I entered the terminal. I noted the sign for baggage claim and headed that way. As I descended the escalator I saw Melissa and Nick. I smiled when she waved when she saw me.

“Jenn!”

“Mel!” We both grinned at each other. She took my sun glasses off and looked at me.

“You look like shit.”

“Thanks for the pick me up.” I said sarcastically.

“You’re welcome.”

“Hey you.” I said as Nick came and gave me a hug.

“Hey, everything will be okay. He’s an idiot sometimes but he’s not stupid.” He said looking down at me. I nodded but didn’t say anything. He saw the tears welling up in my eyes again and pulled me into his hug again. “Let’s get your stuff and get you home where you can get some decent sleep.” I nodded and headed to get my bags.

I didn’t remember much on the ride home. The fact that I slept most of the way is the main reason why.

“Jenn.”

“Hm?” I asked sleepily.

“We are here.” I heard Mel reply.

“Oh.” I pulled myself out of my daze long enough to get my things up to the guest room.

“We will see you later.” Mel said as she put the last of my luggage on the floor beside the bed.

“Thank you both. I will see you soon.” I had never been one that could go long without my eight hours of sleep. But now, that I was back in a bed, I realized just how lonely I was. I had been with Aj for years. Now here I was alone again. I really thought he was the one. I didn’t think I would have to look again. I felt the tears coming anew and this time I didn’t fight them. I couldn’t have stopped them if I had wanted to anyway. Before long the endless darkness of sleep consumed me.

Howie looked around Aj’s house. Something was definitely going on. His house was a total mess. There were at least 3 pizza boxes on the coffee table, what looked to be the leaning tower of clothes had appeared in the corner of the living room. Aj’s house hadn’t been like this in years.

“Aj?” Howie called from the foyer. Aj had missed their lunch today and he wanted to check on him. “Jenn?” As soon as he said her name, it hit him. Jenn wasn’t there. That’s why the house is a mess. Howie walked through the living room slowly then climbed the stairs two at a time. He knocked on Aj’s bedroom door. He heard only a grunt from the other side. “Age, it’s Howie. I’m coming in.” He said as he tested the door to see if it was locked. It wasn’t and he entered to find Aj laying face down in the middle of a made bed. It was the only room in the house that he had seen that wasn’t a mess. “Aj, what happened?” He was shocked when Aj looked up at him and Howie realized he hadn’t been asleep.

“She left.”

“I can tell, what happened?”

“I wasn’t here enough and she left.”

“When did she leave?” Howie knew that Aj would clam up soon enough so he had to get as much information out of him as he possibly could.

“A week ago.”

“Have you talked to her?”

“I called, she won’t answer her cell.”

Howie had to ask the question that would probably shut AJ right up, but he had to know before he could make a decision on what to do next. If he said yes, then he wouldn’t step in and try to help, if he said no then he would do what ever he could to help get Aj back with Jenn. “Aj, look at me bro.” He waited until Aj looked up at him, “Did you before she left or after cheat on her?”
He saw the fire in Aj’s eyes and knew the answer immediately.

“Fuck you Howie.” Aj said, his voice more of a growl.

“Okay I just had to ask. I had to know what I was dealing with.” Howie held up his hands as in submission.

“I think we both know how I felt about her.”

“Felt or feel?” He grinned at Aj as he looked at him. Yep, feel. “Before we do anything we have to get your house cleaned, it reeks in here.”

“Not in here. It still smells like her in here.”
Howie’s heart broke as Aj picked up a pillow and held it to his face. “I miss her so much.” Aj’s voice cracked as he held the pillow tighter. Just the thought of losing Leigh made Howie’s heart break. He couldn’t even begin to imagine the pain Aj was going through. He knew Aj loved Jenn, he had watched Aj as he changed after he met her. The wild man had become calmer, happier.

“Come on man, lets get someone in here to clean up.”
Aj looked up at him and smiled weakly. “Come on.”
Howie knew Aj needed to get out of the house. Aj never did good locked up some where for long. “Go get a shower, and I’ll call the cleaning service I used. Then we will go get lunch.” Howie said as he pushed him toward the bathroom.

An hour later Howie was answering the doorbell as Aj came down the stairs. Howie explained to them which rooms needed to be cleaned and asked them to leave the master bedroom alone.

Howie stepped outside and found Aj sitting by the pool smoking. “You ready to go?” Howie began to wonder if Aj had heard him until Aj turned and looked at him.

“What if I screwed up and she is gone?”

“Then we work from there. But I don’t think she’s gone for good. Jenn is a fighter, she might have thought you wanted her to leave. But she’s not one to give up. Now come on I’m starving.” Aj stood slowly and they made their way out to Howie’s car.

“Howie, what am I going to do?” I asked as I took a drag off my cigarette.

“You have to work to get her back.” Howie stated bluntly. He never minced his words.

“God,” I lowered my head to my hands, “How? Howie, I fucked up. She wouldn’t even listen to me.”

“Aj, you said you didn’t cheat on her.”

“No, I wouldn’t. It’s never crossed my mind.”

“Okay then, there is very little besides that will just end a relationship. Sure things build and it gets rough and then it ends, but I think everything will be okay.”

“I haven’t slept in days. I miss her, but it’s the little things that I didn’t even notice that I miss the most about her. The sounds she made when she slept. It’s like I can’t sleep ‘cause I can’t kiss her good night. God I’m so stupid.” I said from my impromptu head rest. “I just let her leave.”

“No, your in love Aj. Get used to it. You’re gonna do things you will regret from now on. Just make sure you let her know you love her.” Howie said grinning.

“ I want to, and I will but I’m worried I won’t have the chance again.”

“Dude,” I looked up at Howie, he was grinning, “everything will be okay.”

“When did you get this perpetual happy stick up your ass?” Howie didn’t answer he just shrugged.

I laughed as Melissa did her impression of the lady who she had hired to make her wedding cake. I couldn’t help but laugh she had it down pat.
“She flipped out so bad.” I said through gulps of air. “Dee, you would have died.” I said to another friend of ours who had come into town while Kevin was on a press tour.
“What did she say?” Dee asked as she tried to calm down from laughing so hard.
“She was like, you can’t have that many cakes.” Mel said lowering her voice to the octave of the lady.
“All Melissa said was she wanted the main cake and four cakes that were just like the main cake but smaller. You would have thought Mel said ‘I want 100 cakes.’”
“Her face got so red, and I swear I thought she was going to explode.” Melissa said laughing.
“Good lord.” Dee said laughing. “That is just too funny.”
“Oh I know. I had to hold my breath, it was like something out of a cartoon. She was all huffing and puffing. It was weird at first then it just got funnier and funnier.” I said wiping a tear as it fell.
“Oh gosh.” Mel said as she leaned back in her chair. “God I can’t believe I’ve got one month till I’m Mrs. Nickolas Carter.”
“Oh lord here she goes again.” I said poking Dee on the arm, “She’s going into her dream state.” I said laughing as Mel gave me her “go to hell” look.

I had been in Nashville for almost 2 months, I wish I could say time had flown by but it really hadn’t. Being here and watching Melissa and Nick so happy had really put a strain on me, but I would have never told Melissa, or Nick for that matter.
“So,” I felt Dee’s eyes on me before she said anything, and I knew what was coming, “How are you holding up?”
“I’m fine.” I pasted a bright, but fake smile on my face.
“Has anyone ever told you when you fake a smile you look like the joker?” Dee said grinning.
“Oh bite me.”
“Seriously, how are you?”
“I’m fine.”
“Okay I will pry since you aren’t forthcoming with the information I am seeking.” Dee said folding her hands in her lap as she leaned back in her chair, “Have you talked to him?”
“No.”
“Has he called?”
“Yes.” Mel looked up at me, “What?”
“I just assumed you would tell me if he called.” Melissa stated. I just shook my head.
“It hurts enough when he calls, I usually don’t want to talk about it.” I said playing with the napkin laying in my lap.
“Okay,” Melissa reached across the table and took my hand in hers, “I know you want everything to work out, but if you don’t talk to him you aren’t giving it a true chance.”
“I know, I probably would talk to him if he ever left a message. But he never does. I mean he could be calling me to find out where I want him to send all my stuff.”
“Oh please!” Both Melissa and Dee spoke at the time. They looked at each other and laughed.
“He isn’t calling you for that and you know it. That man loves you. Sure he may have screwed up,” I looked at Melissa when she said “may have”, “Okay! Okay! He screwed up.” I nodded and she continued, “but everyone is going to make mistakes. You know that. When he calls, just talk to him.”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you want to be with him?” Dee asked.
“Of course. I love him.”
“Okay that is your answer. When he calls talk to him.”
“Whatever.” I said, “Okay when are we going to look at your wedding dress.” I asked Melissa trying to change the subject.
“Ohhhh subject change. I will remember where we were, but I’m going tomorrow.”
“Okay, well I hate to cut this short but I have to meet Kevin at the hotel to go for our fitting for the premier.” Dee said as she paid for her meal.
“Ohhhh the life of a broadway star’s wife. She has SO much stress.” I said laughing at Deen’s face.
“Oh yes it is so stressful.” She said sticking her tongue at me. “I will talk to you soon.” She said as she hugged my neck. “Mel, I will see you at the wedding is not before that.” She said as she stood.
“Okay, have fun!” Melissa said as she left the table.

Nick dialed Aj’s number as he sat at his desk in the study.
“Hello.” Aj answered his voice subdued and quiet.
“Hey Age.”
“Hey Nick.”
“How you doing?”
“I’m okay.” Aj said sighing.
“Sounds like you might be lying.” Nick said, not really knowing how Aj would take the news he was about to give him.
“Maybe.” Aj replied sounding distracted.
“I heard about you and Jenn.”
“Who called, Howie?”
“No.”
“Then who?” Aj was officially paying attention.
“She’s here.”
“What?!”
“She’s been here. I figured you knew.”
“How in the hell would I know? How long has she been there?”
“Since she left.”
“Dammit Nick. You could have called me.”
“Well Aj, I thought you knew. We didn’t know until today that you were calling her. And I am calling you. But you do remember I’m getting married in less than a month. My mind is on other things.”
“Yeah I know. Okay does she know you called me?”
“No.” Nick answered wondering where this was going.
“Okay listen, I’m not taking any chances, it’s been too long. I’ll be there tomorrow. Please don’t say anything to her.”
“Okay.” Nick wondered how well this meeting would go over. “Okay, I won’t tell her.”

“Jenn?” Mel called through Jenn’s bedroom door.
“Yeah.” Jenn’s reply was muffled but she heard it. She pushed open the door and saw Jenn laying on the bed wiping tears from her face.
“Are you okay?” Mel asked as she sat down on the edge of the bed.
“Yeah I’m okay.” Jenn answered smiling weakly.
“You know if you need to talk, I’m always here.”
“Yeah, I’m staying in your house.” Jenn said grinning.
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah I do. I just,” Jenn started but her voice cracked and she paused, “I thought this was it.”
“Sweetie, you don’t know it’s not the one. He IS calling you know.”
“Yeah I know, but why?”
“Probably to talk to you. Usually that’s why people call.” Jenn couldn’t help but smile.
“I just want to be happy. It’s like I think I’m getting better then I have a day like today and it’s like I can’t breathe cause I can’t stop thinking about him.” Jenn said closing her eyes as the tears began anew.
“You will be happy. I promise you will be.”
“I’ll be okay. I’m going to take me some Tylenol and try to get some sleep,” Jenn said as she wiped the tears from her face again.
“Okay, just call me if you need me.”
“Okay. Night, and Mel, thank you.”
“You’re welcome. That’s what friends are here for.” Mel said as she stood from the bed. “Night, see you in the morning.”
“Okay.”

I sighed as I climbed behind the wheel and started the truck, I pulled out my cell and called Nick’s cell.
“Lo.”
“Hey Nick. I’m here and I’m on my way.”
“Okay, the girls just left. They are going to look at wedding dresses.”
“Okay what time are they coming back?”
“I don’t know. I have to meet them at the tux place, today is my fitting apparently.” Nick grumbled something under this breath. I didn’t have to ask, I knew he hated fittings.
“Okay, well I’m going to go to the hotel first, take a nap and then I will be over.” I said yawning, 4 am wake ups were a thing of the past for me, or at least I thought they were.
“Okay that sounds good. I’m leaving here at 2.”
“Okay, I’ll be there around 1 then.”
“Okay, talk to you then.”

Nick sighed and picked up the home phone. He dialed Mel’s cell.
“Hello.”
“Hey baby.”
“Hey, whatcha doin’?” Mel asked hearing the odd tone in Nick’s voice.
“I have something to tell you that Jenn doesn’t need to know right now.” Nick said sitting down at his desk.
“Well, Aj is in Nashville.”
“WHAT?! Shit.” Nick chuckled, Melissa very seldom ever cussed. Nick could hear Jenn saying something in the back ground. “Oh nothing. Just some stupid letter from a fan.” Nick laughed, Melissa couldn’t lie if her life depended on it. “So Nick,” She let her voice trail off.
“He’s heading to his hotel but he said he would be here around 1.”
“Okay, well I will see you around 2:30 at the tux place right?”
“Yeah, do you want me to bring Aj?”
“God I don’t know. I will figure it out and I will let you know.” Mel said looking over at Jenn.
“Okay, love you.”
“Love you too. Bye.”

“What is going on?” I asked Mel as she closed her cell.
“Nothing just some stuff has come up. Nothing to worry about.” Mel said looking out the window at the scenery passed by.
“Anything I can help with?” I was worried by her tone of voice.
“No, I think it will work itself out.” Mel looked back at me and smiled. I knew something was up but I also knew Mel wouldn’t tell me until she was ready.
“Okay.” I said as I entered the turn lane.

Melissa looked up as Nick and Aj walked into the store. Mel watched as Aj's face fell when he didn't see Jenn.

"Hey," Nick kissed Mel as he neared her. His eyes asked the unasked question.

"She had to go to the florist for me. I totally forgot that today was the dead-line for ordering the flowers."

"Oh." Nick said and turned to Aj. "Well since you're here, you might as well be fitted too."

"Yeah, I guess." Aj sat down slowly beside Mel as Nick went into the dressing room with the suits that Mel had picked out for him.

"Hey," Mel said as she looked at Aj.

He looked up at her and she could see how disappointed he was. "Hey."

"If you want to go to the florist you can go."

"We came in one car, I think it would be best if waited." He looked at Mel, "Is she mad?"

"No, scared you don't love her. But not mad."

"What?"

"Yeah she thinks you are calling her to ask her where she wants you to send her stuff." She grinned at Aj's shocked expression.

"God, did I mess up that bad? Bad enough that she thinks I don't love her?" He said rubbing his forehead with the palm of his hand.

"No, she's scared Aj. I think that if you had waited any longer it might have been too long. I think she's getting ready to shut out the pain-"Mel started, but was interrupted by Aj.

"And in the process shut me out too." Aj sighed and looked up as Nick came out of the dressing room.

I looked at my watched as I opened the door to the florist's shop. 20 minutes to spare.

"Hi I'm here for Melissa Barnes and Nick Carter." I said to the woman behind the counter.

"Ah yes, I just happened to remember that she said to call her if she hadn't come in by now."

"Yes, everything is running together today." I said smiling.

"Very understandable. Do you know exactly what she wants?"

"Yes, I believe that everything is written down in here."

"Very good. Let's get started then." She said as she motioned me toward a table covered in patterns and flowers.

Almost an hour later, I had almost finished up everything at the florist, when we realized that the only thing we didn't have was the color of the flower petals for the flower girls.

"Of all the things to forget." I said to the florist laughing.

"You would be surprised at what we forget at this time." She said smiling.

"Let me call and see what Melissa wants." I said as I dialed Mel's cell number.



I rang at least 3 times before I heard Nick answer. "Lo."

"Hey Nick, is Mel available? I need to ask her a quick question."

"Yeah hang on." I heard him call Mel's name, and it hit me, If they are at a fitting for Nick, why is Nick answering the phone... I waited until Mel picked up the phone.

"Hello."

"Hey, I thought Nick was being fitted, why is he answering your phone?" I asked and received silence an answer. "Mel?"

"Well you know how it is."

"Whatever, listen I need to know what color you want for the flower girls flowers."

"Oh god I knew I was forgetting something. Make them the same color as the bridesmaids flowers." I could hear people talking in the background but couldn't make out what was being said. Something was going on, and I knew I would figure it out soon enough,

"Okay, I will talk to you in a few minutes." I said as I hung up. I looked back up at the florist, "She wants them to be the same color as the bridesmaids flowers."

"Okay very good, I think that is everything."

"Thank you so much for fitting us in." I said as I stood.

"Your welcome and thanks for coming on in. I'll call the number on the contacts when they come in."

"Okay thank you." I said as I walked out back into the bring sunlight. "Now to figure out what is going on with Mel." Surely Nick hasn't got cold feet. I laughed at my rambling thought. I knew better. I shook my head and pulled out of the parking lot heading back to the tuxedo rental place. I dialed Mel's cell as I made my way into traffic.

"Hello."

"Hey, I'm done and I'm heading toward you."

"Oh well, we are done we are heading back to the house." She said a little too quickly.

"Melissa Barnes you tell me right now. What is going on?"

"What are you talking about." She answered me and I knew she was lying to me.

"Melissa stop playing around we both know when you are lying. What is wrong."

"Nothing. I swear nothing is wrong." She said sighing.

"Fine, don't tell me. But I will find out what it is. I'll talk to you when you get home." I was frustrated. I knew something was wrong, and I hate to worry about something and not even know what I'm worrying about.

Mel sighed as she looked up at Nick. "She knows. She knows something is up." Nick sighed and looked at Aj as he exited the dressing room in his own clothes.

"What?" He stopped as he noticed both of them looking at him, "What's wrong?"

"She knows something is going on." Nick said as he turned heading out to the truck. "I just hope she doesn't figure it out and leave before we can get there."

"She won't." Mel said hoping she was right. Jenn could be very stubborn and extremely skittish.

I sighed as I pulled into Nick’s driveway. I had beat them, I figured as much. They are probably not even on their way. I parked the truck at the back of the house, not wanting to block Nick’s parking place. I climbed from the truck and headed into the house. I was sticky from going in and out of air conditioning and so I decided to jump in the shower before they got home. I knew it would put me in a better mood, than I was in which I didn’t think I could be in a worse mood.

As I stepped out of the bathroom I listened to see if I could tell if Mel and Nick had made it back yet. I stepped out onto the landing at the top of the stairs and called Mel’s name, when I didn’t get an answer I returned to my room to dry my hair.

“Jenn!” Melissa called my name as she came into the house. She couldn’t hear me drying my hair. “Nick, see if she’s out back.” Mel mounted the stairs, as Nick reentered the house she looked down at him as he came into view, “She’s not but the truck is.” Mel sighed a sigh of relief knowing that I hadn’t left.
I jumped a foot in the air as she entered my room. “Jesus Mel!” I said as I flipped my hair back and turned off the hair dryer. “You scared the shit out of me.”
“I called your name. I guess you couldn’t hear me.”
“Yeah, not with this monstrosity screaming in my ear I couldn’t.” I said motioning to my hair dryer.
“Okay come downstairs. We need to talk.” Why did I suddenly feel very nervous when she said that.
“Mel, what is wrong?” I followed her out of the room when she didn’t answer.
“Listen, I know you have been through a lot in the last few months, but you have to listen to what I’m about to say. I don’t want you to leave until you have heard everything, okay?”
“Mel you’re scaring me.” I said looking at her.

I looked at the door way when Nick walked in, “Nick what’s wrong. Mel is scaring-“ I couldn’t breathe let alone talk as Nick stepped out of the way and I saw Aj standing behind him. I sat down heavily in the chair behind me. I thought that I had begun to get over him, well I thought wrong. It has been 2 months and every feeling I’d ever had for him rushed over me as I saw him standing there. I lowered my head to my hands and felt the tears return anew.

Aj looked at Nick and then at Mel. Nick crossed the room and took Mel’s hand and entered his office closing the door.
Aj crossed the room and knelt down in front of me. “Baby.” Aj started.
“Don’t call me baby,” I said not lifting my head from my hands. I felt my heart ache even more as I heard his voice.
“Jenn, please listen to me.”
“Aj, why now?” I looked at him. “Why after over 2 months are you here now?”
“I didn’t know where you were. I wanted to talk to you so bad but you wouldn’t answer your phone.”
“Aj it’s too late.”
“No it’s not. It’s not too late for us. I love you too much to just walk away. Yeah I fucked up, and I’ll probably fuck up again, but I’m not giving up.” I couldn’t stand it, I had to get away from him. It hurt too much to be so close to him. I stood from the chair and climbed the stairs two at time and entered my room.