Michelle and AJ were celebrating their fifth anniversary. Their first one together at home in Los Angeles. AJ was working down at the dance studio with the other Backstreet Boys preparing for their tour starting in just a few weeks time. He had promised to be home by no later than 8pm.

With the house in candlelight, flower petals around the house, leading to their bedroom, Michelle had cooked a meal for them, it was just keeping warm in the oven til AJ got home. Michelle sat on the kitchen bench waiting patiently, waiting for AJ to come in, looking at the clock.

By 10pm, still no AJ. No message, no call. This wasn’t like AJ. He would have called or something saying he was late. She didn’t want to call anyone in case she was over reacting but she felt she had to do something when AJ’s phone was switched off – the only time his phone was off was when he was in the air, performing or when they had media commitments.

“Hey Shell, what’s happenin babe?” Nick answered when she called him. Nick lounging back on the couch at his place watching TV, channel surfing.
“Nothing much. You heard from AJ tonight?” Michelle asked him, taking dinner out of the oven and throwing it in the trash, all spolied.
“Shouldn’t he be with you?” Nick remarked, Nick sitting up turning off the TV.
“Yeah that’s what I thought. You all left the studio around 7.30pm didn’t ya?” Michelle asked putting the dishes in the dishwasher.
“We all left about 6 actually. Howie had something on, Brian was taking Baylee to one of his classes and Leighanne couldn’t as she’s been held up at work so we all left around 6pm. AJ mentioned you and he were doing something.” Nick explained, getting up and going to his cell phone to send a message to AJ.
“He didn’t have some radio thing or something?” Michelle asked putting a frozen pizza and putting in the oven.
“Nah, he was heading straight home, he wanted to surprise you.” Nick told me, sending the sms to AJ.
“Well he sure has surprised me.” Michelle commented.
“He ain’t turned up?” Nick asked.
“Nope. I haven’t heard anything from AJ since this morning when he was leaving to go to the studio.” Michelle told him.
“Mmmm.” Nick said.
“What?” She asked him.
“Sounds as though this isn’t the first time?” Nick asked.
“Don’t know what your talking about.” Michelle replied.
“Shell, it’s me. You tell me everything. What’s going on?” Nick asked concerned.
“Nick everything is fine. I’m just concerned as it’s our anniversary and he promised to be here.” Michelle lied.
“I’m not over reacting am I?” Michelle asked walking towards the front door window to see if there was any glimpse of AJ coming in the driveway.
“Nah, no way, considering he was meant to be home at about 6pm.” Nick replied as he put his cell phone down next to him on the couch.
“Alright, well thanks for letting me know.” Michelle said walking back into the kitchen.
“If he ain’t home by midnight, call me alright. Love ya babe.” Nick replied.
“Back at ya.” She replied and got off the phone.

Right on midnight, AJ came home. Michelle was up in their bedroom, everything removed, petals, candles, like nothing ever happened. Sitting up in bed reading a book, AJ walked in.
“I am so sorry! When I left the studio, Mom called and spoke to her for a few minutes. After that I saw Danny who I hadn’t seen in ages and caught up with him. I was then on my way home...” AJ began to apologise.
“Save it. I have spent the last 4 hours trying to get in contact with you. Your phone was off or were ignoring my calls. Your Mom did not call as I was on the phone to her and she hadn’t heard from you in a couple of days and was wanting you to call her.” Michelle snapped.
“Oh.” AJ said.
“I thought tonight was going to be special AJ. You promised me. After everything, we hardly see each other as it is.” Michelle told him.
“I am sorry. I am so, so, so sorry babe.” AJ apologised.
“Why was your phone off and don’t say your battery was low. There are payphones and you have a charger in your car.” Michelle asked.
“Please, not now. I’m tired and I gotta be up early in the morning.” AJ whined sitting on the bed taking his shoes off.
“Not in here. Not tonight.” Michelle told him throwing him his pillows and turning over facing away from AJ.

Michelle was awake at 6am, getting ready to go to work when she checked to see if AJ was still there in the spare bedroom, the bed wasn’t even slept in, even if he did make it properly. She got downstairs and there were signs that he wasn’t there. His car was gone. Michelle continued on getting ready for work when her phone rang.
“Shell it’s Nick. I knew you’d be up so thought would call.” Nick said when I answered the phone.
“Hey how are ya?” Michelle asked.
“I should be asking you that.” He replied.
“Came in right on midnight, he couldn’t come up with a proper excuse, sent him to the spare room. Got up at 6 for work and he was gone. I think he was gone all night.” Michelle told him.
“What is up with that asshole!” Nick commented while he was making breakfast for himself.
“I’m not happy I can tell you that.” Michelle remarked as she was deciding what clothes to wear in the wardrobe.
“He did know it was your anniversary. He was talking about it and all.” Nick said.
“Least he mentioned it to you.” Michelle sighed.
“Listen, I gotta get going down to the studio. Gotta shake my ass off. I’ll talk to you later alright.” Nick told me.
“You and that ass of yours.” Michelle laughed.

Michelle, at work, a singer herself was working on some music with her band when Brian called her.
“You free to talk?” Brian asked in his car parked on Rodeo Drive outside Starbucks.
“What’s wrong?” Michelle replied stopping writing.
“It’s AJ...relax. He is alright.” Brian said.
“What is it then?” Michelle asked.
“I’m not one for spying on anyone and all as you know but I just saw it and all.” Brian tried to say.
“Brian, you can tell me. What is it?” Michelle asked.
“I’m out here in Rodeo Drive, just getting drinks for the guys on the way into the studio and saw AJ coming out of Starbucks where I was going into. Thankfully I was still in my car.” Brian said.
“Yeah and...” Michelle asked.
“He was walking out with another woman, an arm around her. Being how he should be with you lets put it that way.” Brian informed me.
“Ok thanks Brian. Thanks for letting me know.” I replied trying to hold things in.
“I’m sorry I had to tell you this.” Brian apologised.
“Brian, it’s alright. Doesn’t surprise me. I’m sorry but I gotta go. Manager wants a meeting.” Michelle replied.
“I’ll call later alright.” Brian said and we got off the phone.
“You right Shell?” Brenda my manager asked me as Michelle turned her phone off.
“Yeah fine.” She replied smiling and walked with Brenda to her office.

When Michelle got home that night, she started to pack her bags. This was one time too many. She and AJ had been separated more times then they cared to let on to anyone. Suitcases on the bed she threw her clothes in them not giving a thought to how she was packing her bags. Sooner she was out of there, the better. Dragging the suitcases downstairs, the doorbell rang.

“We just wanted to see how you are.” Nick said as he, Brian and Howie stood at the front door.
“I’m fine. Just fine.” Michelle replied heading back upstairs.
“If you are fine then why are you packing?” Brian asked.
“My mind is clear, I’m not thinking crazy.” She replied as she was getting some of her things off the shelf and putting them in bags.
“Michelle, hold up for a minute. Calm down. What you do you mean?” Howie asked her, stopping her in her tracks holding her hands together.
“My suspicions were right. He has been doing this...again.” She told him.
“What? He been doing it again?” Howie asked shocked.
“Um yeah.” Brian spoke up.
“Since when?” Howie asked as Michelle let go of Howie’s hands and sat on the bed.
“Um, this time about 2 weeks.” Michelle replied looking up at Howie.

“There’s been more times?” Brian asked shocked.
“More than you care to know.” Michelle replied getting back up and finishing her packing, the guys standing around shocked not knowing what to say and do.
“Shell, why? Why are you still with him?” Nick asked her, standing next to her as she removed some photos and CD’s of the shelves.
“Because I loved him. Not anymore. I’ve had it. I’m sorry guys but I’m done with AJ. I love AJ at the same time.” Michelle replied as she was walking out of the room going downstairs starting to put things in her car.
“Have you talked to him?” Howie asked following her.
“I’ve tried but he always has excuses for talking to me. When I leave, that’s when he talks and then he says all this stuff and I forgive him and then we are back where we started again.” Michelle explained.
“How long has this been going on for? The whole cheating thing?” Brian asked as he was carrying some stuff down the stairs into her car.
“We’ve been together 5 years....probably four and a half.” She replied casually.
“WHAT! Michelle, why didn’t you tell us? Tell me?” Nick asked.
“Because you are best friends with him and you would take his side.” Michelle told them.
“But come on, you and I are best friends, we have known each other for so long, you been there for all my crap. Why?” Nick pleaded.
“He’s right. Why?” Howie added.
“I don’t know alright. I don’t know. I guess I wanted to see if he would change.” She said.
“Change after 4 ½ years...Shell, as much as we love AJ, he’s been pretty bad at relationships and needs to learn to respect and cherish the relationship.” Brian told her as she finished closing the car doors with her stuff in.
“Where you going to go?” Howie asked.
“I’m staying at a hotel for a few days. I’m going out of town in a day or so anyway so it’s all good.” Michelle told him.
“What about your stuff? Where’s that going?” Brian asked.
“Once sorted out properly, be leaving some stuff at Jason’s. He’s got some room in his garage so I can store it there.” Michelle explained as she was doing a final check of her things around the house.
“Does AJ know this? You going out of town?” Nick asked.
“Not really.” She replied as she shut the door, handing the keys to Brian. “I won’t need them.” She added. The guys and Michelle hugged before she got in the car and drove off, the guys fading away in the background as she drove off.

Staying at a hotel near the studio, Michelle just sat in the hotel room in darkness, no lights on, the room silent apart from the sound of the fridge making sounds to let her known that it was on. She wanted to stay away from the media, from everyone. The media and the world were already judging her about her relationship with AJ and her as a solo artist. Michelle was different from the other solo artists out there. Michelle was very curvy and loved every minute of it. She felt comfortable for who she was.

She left her phone on in the off chance that she would hear from AJ. This had been the longest she hadn’t heard from him in all the times they have split up. Nearly a whole 24 hours since they had “talked”.

3am, Michelle was still wide awake. The main road didn’t help. Car lights flashing all the time as they drove past her hotel room. As she glanced outside the window, moving the stained curtain aside to look out, she wondered if she should call AJ. 3am was a good time. She thought she would either wake him up if he was asleep or somewhere and if it were off, well she knew what AJ thought of her. She rang him. Been over 24 hours since she heard his voice.

“AJ it’s Michelle. I know you have gone behind my back again, but at least be a man and talk to me.” Michelle pleaded when he answered the phone.
“Why bother? You know the truth? Last night showed ya. I thought why should I when I know what your going to do?” AJ simply replied, the words rolling off his mouth. AJ at their place, sitting in the lounge room playing video games, dogs asleep at his feet.
“That all you can say? Bloody hell AJ. No apology? No nothing?” Michelle shrieked at him as she moved away from the curtain and sitting in the middle of the top of the bed.
“I’m sorry?” AJ replied shrugging his shoulders.
“My god AJ. ‘I’m Sorry’. After how I found out. I had Brian confirm. I smelt the perfume on everything. If you were experienced at this, you would have known to put on different clothes as you walked in and shit.” Michelle said, furious.
“You’re the one that keeps coming back to me.” AJ reminded her.
“Because somewhere deep inside I love you.” Michelle cried.
“Somewhere deep inside?” AJ remarked.
“Yeah, yeah I do. This time, it’s it. I’m over it. I’m sick of all this shit of what your doing to me. I don’t need to put up with this. In case you haven’t noticed, I have gotten all my stuff out. We are more than over. We are so finished.” Michelle screamed at him and got off the phone.

Feeling frustrated, she knew had to go out. Michelle had to get rid of all the frustrations of AJ and the only way to get rid of it was to go for workout at the gym. But not at 3am in the morning. The only place she knew of was in the studio.

Getting into the studio she opened the doors and let herself in, night security saying hello and letting her through. In the fitness area she saw the treadmill. Perfect. She set herself up and she walked off her frustration.

Michelle’s frustration was that much that she didn’t realise that she had walked non stop that it was sunrise and the cleaners were in the offices cleaning away. The sweat from her body and her face red let people know she was on fire. There were showers in the studio and Michelle decided to have a shower there, she always kept a spare set of clothes in her locker.

“So what you gonna do?” It was Brenda.
“How you know I was here?” Michelle asked as she wrapped a towel around herself and pulled the shower curtain across the rail, walking over to the locker to get her spare clothes.
“I have my sources.” She replied as she sat down on the bench near where Michelle was dressing herself.
“Is it over? Is it for good?” Brenda asked.
“Oh definitely. It’s over. Today is a brand new day.” Michelle replied.
“What you going to do? Where ya staying at?” Brenda asked.
“Staying at the Entry at the moment and putting some stuff over at Jason’s. He hasn’t got the room for me personally, so stay at the Entry til I can a new place.” Michelle informed her.
“You serious! The Entry! Surely you could do better than that?” Brenda asked.
“All I can get last minute. Besides, outta town for a bit.” She said.
“You could have called me. You could have crashed at my place for a bit.” Brenda suggested.
“Thanks, but I just wanted to be alone. If I do need somewhere, I will let you know.” Michelle replied giving Brenda a hug.

Later that day, Brian called Michelle to see how she was.
“How you doing?” Brian asked Michelle as he was grabbing some lunch from the studio cafeteria.
“Yeah going alright. Brenda and I are just going through some time before we go out to New York on Thursday. How’s things with you guys?” Michelle replied, as she was rehearsing some of her songs for her tour.
“Yeah going alright. Same as you, rehearsing before we head out again. Nick’s been a complete dork. We got it recording and gonna put it on the net, fan club, twitter, you know everywhere.” Brian laughed.
“What did he do?” Michelle sighed giggling.
“I can’t say. It’s just too funny.” Brian laughed.
“Hey, Rok quit it...I still taller than you!” She heard Nick in the background. Michelle laughed.
“Hey Shell, help me out here” Nick called out to her through Brian’s phone.

“Seriously, you doing alright? Where ya staying?” Brian asked as he sat down at a table, with Nick opposite her.
“I’m doing alright, staying at a hotel near here til I fly out and all. When get back will start looking for somewhere. Can’t be nothing flash either.” Michelle replied.
“Do you want the Mrs to look at places? She and Leigh can look at places with the kids.” Brian suggested.
“Thanks, but I’ll be right. I wanna do this on my own. I wanna be independent and all. I need to do this.” Michelle replied.
“You aren’t doing this in spite of AJ are you?” Brian asked Nick looked at him weird and concerned at the same time, Nick munching on his burger.
“No. Not at all.” Michelle replied moving over to the window and looking outside.
“Alright...you take it easy alright. We love ya. Bay says hi and he misses ya.” Brian told her.
“Tell Bay I say hi back. I’ll catch up with him when I’m back in LA. Love ya guys.” Michelle replied smiling.

After she got off the phone from Brian, Michelle smiled. She knew this was going to be alright. She was going to do it on her own.

Two nights later, Brenda and Michelle were at Los Angeles Airport for the red eye flight to New York. Be about a week out of town. Michelle always liked New York, sometimes she felt as though she belonged there in some way. She had this connection to New York.

“Just saying, could I live in New York?” Michelle asked Brenda as they sat back in their seats, in economy talking.
“No, because your manager is in Los Angeles.” Brenda replied laughing.
“I’m serious. Bren, you know how much I love New York and New York loves me. I’m basically a free bird, I’m spending a lot of time here in New York. New York has airports that fly out overseas to where I go sometimes and some parts quicker.” Michelle explained.
“You have thought about this haven’t ya?” Brenda asked her.
“I’ve always wanted to be in New York. I feel as though I belong. Apart from LA I don’t feel comfortably really anywhere else.” Michelle replied.
“This doesn’t have anything to do with a certain someone?” Brenda asked.
“No it certainly does not.” Michelle laughed.
“Let me give it some thought. I am not saying yes and I am not saying no.” Brenda told her. For some of the flight, Michelle had song ideas that were coming into her head and began writing them down.

Arriving in New York there was no time to relax, it was straight from the airport to NBC for the Today Show. Michelle was going to be performing at the end of the show and also doing a short interview with them.

As Michelle went to air, she felt powerful. Nothing would get to her. She found it ironic that the song she was singing, ‘Get Out But I Love You’ was so true to how Michelle was feeling at the moment. Michelle had written that song, AJ co-produced. Michelle put everything into the song. She didn’t have to act. She was venting her frustrations and more or less telling AJ what she thought of him.

“Ah, girl, you were hoping that AJ was watching that weren’t ya?” Brenda asked as they were in a car going to Times Square for MTV interview and then interviews from around the world.
“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not.” Michelle giggled.
“Oh come on Shell. All of us know that you love AJ. I just wish he would stop cheating and he will realise what he is missing out on.” Brenda replied.
“Yeah I know but I can’t change AJ. He needs to be the one to change. Forever. I will always love AJ. I don’t hate him. Just angry at him.” Michelle said.
“If he doesn’t...well I won’t feel sorry for him.” Brenda added as we arrived at Times Square, still lugging our luggage around. Couldn’t get to the hotel til 4pm and they didn’t trust anyone with their luggage.

For the next 4 hours, Michelle was being interviewed from countries around the world. Some taped interviews, some live interviews and during the time she was able to do some tweets to her fans. Ignoring the ones about those asking if she had split with AJ. During the interviews, Brenda tweeted about the separation and more or less telling people to quit it. It is true but respect Michelle’s and everyone’s privacy.

4pm came and they were able to chill out for a few hours before the radio shows at night or the afternoon radio shows on the west coast called that they couldn’t see when in New York. Once the bellhop left and closed the door, both Michelle and Brenda collapsed on their beds.
“I could just go to sleep like this.” Brenda laughed.
“How are you positioned?” Michelle asked laying on her back facing the ceiling.
“Look.” Brenda replied.
“I can’t.” Michelle cracked up laughing.
“Can we order room service without picking up a phone?” Brenda asked.
“Ah, this place don’t have room service.” Michelle replied.
“AW what! This sucks!” Brenda exclaimed.
“You’re the one that organised this place. Blame yourself.” Michelle said.
“Damn it. Oh well, we just go hungry for a bit longer.” Brenda laughed.

At a cafe near their hotel, Michelle and Brenda talked over things of what would be happening that night, going through what each radio program was like, what the people were like and how long would be with the show.
“And then after you finish with the radio station in London, you then go to Broadway and streak there...”Brenda said getting Michelle out of her daydream.
“Oh yeah, yeah ok. Broadway streaking.” Michelle replied.
“Hello! Michelle! Wakey wakey!” Brenda stopped, clicking her fingers right in front of Michelle’s face.
“Oh sorry...What are you saying?” Michelle apologised and looked at Brenda
“Just finishing off the radio shows for later on. You alright girl?” Brenda asked.
“I love him Bren. I love him.” Michelle answered quietly. Brenda got out of her seat and came and sat down next to Michelle.
“I know you do hun. I know you do.” Brenda said putting her arms around Michelle. Michelle just cried.

Next morning, they were up early for a flight to Chicago for some more radio interviews and some in store appearances and meeting fans from competitions and wishes.

Arriving back in Los Angeles, two weeks later, after a full on packed promo tour for Michelle’s album, Michelle stayed at Brenda’s place until she found her own place. Michelle had sent Brian, Howie and Nick a text message saying she just got back into LA. Moments after sending, Nick called.

“Come out with us! PLEASE!” Nick begged.
“Awww WHY?” Michelle begged, quietly giggling.
“Coz I want ya to.” Nick replied, as he was home finishing getting dressed. The guys had some movie premiere to go to.
“You just want me there so you can put your head on my shoulder during the scary scenes.” Michelle laughed.
“I so do not! I ain’t scared.” Nick retorted.
“Remember last time? AJ and I were getting all cozy and then you disturbed us by your head on my shoulder, right where AJ was gonna put his hand.” Michelle reminded him.
“I swear, I won’t! Not this time! PLEASE!” Nick begged.
“Seriously, me out with you all at the movies...Won’t that be awkward with AJ there?” Michelle asked him.
“Oh yeah. Shit!” Nick replied as he was walking down the stairs.
“There will be other times where we can hang out at the movies. Let things settle down a bit. Anyway, your off on tour Monday so its like what 3 days away.” Michelle replied.
“You doing anything for the next 3 days?” Nick asked.
“House hunting.” Michelle replied.
“Stay at my place.” Nick simply said.
“What?” Michelle asked.
“Yeah stay at my place. I ain’t gonna be there for like what 3 months? Or is it 4?” Nick replied.
“You seriously want me to stay at your place?” Michelle asked.
“Er, yeah. I kinda forgot to ask Aaron to crash here and because of that he mad plans with a friend of his who if outta town. I don’t like leaving the place unattended all this time.” Nick said
“Nick, that is just one of the lamest excuses of all time.” Michelle laughed.
“Alright, I was gonna surprise ya. So will ya stay here? Please? I’ll bring you back pressies.” Nick begged laughing.
“How can I resist that? Oh ok, yes I will stay at your place while you are gone.” Michelle sighed, jokingly.
“Great, now while you are here, can you get this....” Nick started to say.
“Hold on a minute. I thought I was just gonna stay? Didn’t mention about anything about nothing else.” Michelle laughed.
“Ok, ok. Great thanks. I gotta go, get this movie premiere done. I’ll talk later alright. Love ya babe.” Nick said as he got in his car.
“Love ya more Kaos.” Michelle laughed.

“So, what did he want?” Brenda asked as Michelle got off the phone and Brenda sat down next to her giving her a drink of water.
“That was just Nick being Nick. When he goes on tour next week, wants me to stay at his place.” Michelle laughed.
“Seems logical when you look at it. Free rent, and all.” Brenda said.
“Yeah true.” Michelle replied.

Over the weekend, Brian, Howie and Nick helped Michelle move into Nick’s place, Baylee coming along to help. “We’re having a boys weekend. Leigh’s off somewhere doing a girly thing so it’s just us two boys. Right Bay?” Brian said as Baylee got out of the car at Jason’s place.
“Yup!” Baylee replied giving Michelle a hug.
“Hey Bay, I know where Shell keep some funny photos of your Dad. Wanna see?” Nick asked Baylee.
“What makes you think they are where you think they are? I could have moved them?” Michelle remarked.
“Shell, I know you too well.” Nick replied.
“It’s true.” Howie commented.
“Hey, how funny are they? Remember my son is a child!” Brian said coming over to where Nick was sitting down on a chair, Baylee on his knee showing the photos.
“I’ve got those saved for later man.” Nick laughed.

By the time they got everything into cars, and went over to Nick’s it was the middle of the afternoon.
“My shout guys...what you want for lunch?” Michelle asked as the final box was inside. Nick’s place was in shambles with him organising things for going away on Monday.
“Anything!” Howie laughed putting down the last box in the spare room in what would be Michelle’s room.
“Food!” Nick laughed.
“Nick, that is what food is!” Baylee remarked. Everyone of us laughing.
“Just grab some burgers or something.” Brian said.
“Righty o.” Michelle replied, grabbing her car keys and heading off to a burger shop.

Entering Santa Monica Boulevard, Michelle’s phone rang.
“What now?” Michelle laughed seeing it was Nick’s cell calling.
“Bay says to go to the Hole In The Wall place. His orders not mine.” Nick said with Baylee excited in the background.
“Anything for the man.” Michelle replied.

Leaving Hole In The Wall, she saw AJ. “Hey how are you?” Michelle said to AJ being polite.
“Hi, yeah going alright. How was the tour?” AJ asked as they stood and talked for a bit.
“Yeah great. Think going to be good, this album. All set for your tour on Monday?” Michelle replied.
“Ready as we can be. Chilling out this weekend before the big one. Europe. I so hate the flight.” AJ commented.
“Especially when flying in the morning too.” Michelle added.
“Yeah, even worse.” AJ replied.
“You’ll be right.” Michelle smiled.
“What you up to?” AJ asked.
“Just got lunch for the guys and Baylee. I’m staying at Nick’s while ya on tour. I was staying at Brenda’s and looking for a place there but Nick being Nick wanted me to stay at his place.” Michelle replied.
“Oh ok that’s cool. Well better let you go. Bay don’t like cold burgers.” AJ remarked.
“Neither do you all.” Michelle laughed.

“What took you so long?” Howie asked as Michelle walked in the door with the burgers.
“Saw AJ.” Michelle replied as they all gathered outside and sat on the veranda.
“Oh.” Howie asked.
“It was alright. He knows I’m staying here so you don’t need to worry about that when on tour. He was the best he has been to me for quite some time.” Michelle replied.
“AJ silly.” Baylee commented.
“Come on Bay...you know that’s not nice.” Brian told Baylee.
“Sorry Daddy.” Baylee apologised.
“But things were alright?” Howie asked.
“Yeah. It was weird but good. I’m actually glad that it happened, today, make things easier for you guys. I can only imagine what it would be like and all. Especially going to Europe next week.” Michelle replied.

Michelle was setting things up in her room, Nick helping her. “Good Saturday night huh?” Nick commented.
“Hey, you could have gone out. I just wanted to chill here and sort things out.” Michelle replied as she was putting clothes in the wardrobe.
“Nah, I didn’t feel like it either. Wanna save my energy for Europe. Gonna be massive.” Nick said.
“Aw come on Nick, I know that’s a lie.” She laughed.
“I’m serious. I wanna chill out. Besides, I’m gonna miss ya.” Nick replied as he sat on the edge of the bed looking at Michelle.
“I’m gonna miss ya too. Be the first tour where I am not on. Be weird.” Shell admitted.
“You’ll be right. You got your tour coming up and all. Starts next month doesn’t it? You got video shoots and stuff haven’t ya?” Nick asked.
“Yeah but some Brenda has suggested we do on tour. I think gonna do one in Florida some where. The weather is picking up and all.” Michelle replied.
“You know, I’m really gonna miss you.” Nick said as he grabbed Michelle’s hand and pulling her to the bed for her to stop.
“I’m gonna miss you too.” Michelle said as Nick looked into her eyes.
“Really gonna miss you.” He whispered as he moved in and kissed Michelle on the lips.

Michelle was blown away. Nick had kissed her. She had always dreamed, even before she became friends with Nick that he would kiss her. Michelle couldn’t help herself, she had to kiss him back.
“I’m sorry.” Nick apologised as they broke apart from each other.
“It’s ok.” She replied, putting her hands on top of his.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so long. I know wrong time and all. I know you love AJ.” He said.
“Confession?” Michelle asked as she put her arms back stretching on the bed.
“Yeah.” Nick replied off the bed facing her.
“I’ve waited for that.” Michelle confessed.
“Well why...” Nick began to say.
“I don’t know.” Michelle replied, a few tears rolling down her face. For a few moments, they couldn’t say anything.
“I love you.” Nick told her, sitting back on the edge of the bed, a hand cupping one side of her face. While Michelle had wanted to hear that from Nick for so long, at this point in time, she didn’t want to hear it. She moved Nick’s hand and got off the bed.
“I love you too.” Michelle whispered looking out the window, overlooking the Los Angeles skyline in lights.
“Well, what is it? If you love me, I love you...” Nick asked now in front of her.
“I don’t know. I seriously don’t know.” Michelle replied, he holding her hand, standing apart.
“Coz of the fact I’m going on tour, too soon after AJ?” Nick asked.
“Maybe, I don’t know. This is something big.” Michelle replied.
“We don’t have to let anyone know. No one has to know.” Nick suggested.
“I don’t know what to do.” Michelle confessed looking up to Nick. Nick just put his arms around her and held her.

Next morning when Nick and Michelle woke up, Michelle was in Nick’s arms sitting outside on the balcony on the deck chairs, a blanket over them. The sun was rising up.
“Morning.” Nick grinned smiling at Michelle.
“Morning.” Michelle replied.
“How are ya?” Nick asked, brushing a few hairs from Michelle’s face away.
“Doing good. You.” Michelle replied.
“Same.” Nick replied giving her a squeeze and pecking a kiss on her forehead.
“I think we better get cracking. You gotta finish packing and everything. You gotta go to Europe tomorrow.” Michelle said.
“I don’t wanna go. I wanna stay here with you.” Nick whined.
“I won’t be here all the time. I’ll be touring as well.” Michelle reminded him.
“But still.” Nick smiled snuggling up to her.

Michelle prepared breakfast while Nick was in the shower and doing some itty bitty things. Michelle wanted to give him a decent breakfast before he went.
“Ok, so what are we going to do? What’s on the agenda first?” Michelle asked.
“Veg out this morning? Boring stuff later?” Nick guessed.
“Nice try Mr. Boring stuff now. Veg out later.” She laughed.
“Aw come on. It’s my last day here. My house. My rules. I’m older.” Nick joked.
“And as the responsible one in this house, boring stuff now, veg out later. Won’t you feel better when everything is done? You can relax and enjoy the last few hours here?” Michelle asked him.
“Mmmm, spose ya right there.” Nick replied poking his tongue at her.

Michelle spent majority of the day going through everything that needed to be organised and packed. With the pace Nick was going, by the time they finished and how many times Nick packed his bags, changing what he was going to take with him on tour, it was 8pm. “And you were saying boring stuff later.” Michelle laughed.

“Hey, let’s do an all nighter. I assume that’s what the guys are doing. Do an all nighter and then we can sleep on the way over there. Time flies by.” Nick suggested as we were cooking dinner.
“What? An all nighter?” Michelle replied.
“Well when ya think about it, we gotta be up at 3am anyway so why not?” Nick explained.
“Meh! Why not?” Michelle shrugged.

After they finished dinner and doing the dishes, throwing bubbles at each other, they went into the lounge and began to watch DVD’s, popcorn in the middle. Michelle and Nick were watching Alien for the millionth time when Michelle decided to throw some popcorn at Nick. Not realising it, he had fallen asleep...at midnight.

“Nick...wake up. It’s 3am, time to get ready.” Michelle whispered in his ear. She could sense was stirring, trying to stay asleep but she would have to kiss him.
“Men!” She cracked up laughing as Nick grabbed her and began to tickle her.

The guys were going to be leaving from the studio, be easier for everyone and less media attention, even at the earlier hours of the morning. Leigh, James, Leighanne, Baylee and I were there with them. “London here we come baby!” AJ shrieked. They all hugged us girls and the kids, including AJ to me before they all got in their van and drove away.
“Who’s up for an early breakfast?” Leigh asked once they have driven off and were gone. James and Bay a little upset.
“Mean who wants coffee?” Leighanne laughed.
“ME!” Leigh and I chorused.
We all got in our cars and went to Starbucks on Santa Monica grabbed our coffees, drinks for the boys.
“Mommy can I go with Michelle?” Baylee asked as we got to our cars.
“You just wanna ride in Nick’s car while he isn’t here. Am I right?” Michelle asked Baylee.
“Alright, alright.” Leighanne laughed.
“Yay!” Baylee cheered as he ran to Michelle, taking her hand and going to the car.

Sitting across the road from the Starbucks, James and Baylee played on the play equipment there, Leigh, Leighanne and Michelle watching on.
“Bay hates it when Brian goes away.” Leighanne sighed.
“James is the same. He is starting to notice when Howie doesn’t come home at night.” Leigh sighed.
“It’s confusing when they are at that age.” Leighanne agreed.
“A few hours of spending special time with them and the kids are fine.” Leigh said.
“Yeah.” Michelle replied.
After the coffees and breakfast, the girls all left to go back home. Michelle into the studio, working on the final touches for the touches for the video shoot.

At the studio, Michelle was presented with ideas for the video for the single ‘Get Out But I Love You’. Michelle wasn’t going to be in the music clip until the very end when there would be a dance routine, signature dance routine. As the song suggested it would be going to involve a couple who were going to fighting and the woman shouting ‘Get Out’ and pointing at the man, telling him to pack his bags and go. The woman then showing herself going out with her friends that night and in the middle of the street doing the dance routine. There would be about 12 dancers with her.

“Where we going to be doing the video?” Michelle asked later that night once things were organised of the choreography, with the help of the top 12 dancers from So You Think You Can Dance.
“We’ve got people looking at places tomorrow. Probably some on the way to the Hollywood sign with that in the background.” Danny, the director of the video replied.
“I don’t like the sound of that. I want it to be more real. Get out of the LA/Hollywood scene. Make it more suburbia kinda thing. Make it more realistic and level with everyone.” Michelle suggested.
“She’s got a point there.” Brenda commented.
“Mmm, yeah alright. I’ll get back to you on that.” Danny replied not totally happy.

After Danny left, she went into the dance studio of where I would be meeting Chris, the choreographer. “First vid hey?” Chris asked once we introduced each other.
“Yeah it is. Finally.” Michelle replied.
“How long you been in the biz?” Chris asked as they walked over to the CD player to put the song in the CD player.
“Ah, for about 5 years. It was only in the last 3 years that Brenda picked me up. We’ve gone through a lot to get this far.” Michelle explained.
“Well in that case, let’s make this an awesome vid.” Chris smiled pressing play on the stereo. They moved to the beat and then when it came to the dancing, Chris showed Michelle what he had planned, Michelle feeling it and copying Chris in some parts. I had more choreography in the video at the end and the more technical moves. Chris spending the first 2 days working with Michelle alone before the final 12 of So You Think You Can Dance came along.

Chris and Michelle worked up til about midnight when Brenda came on in.
“You still here?” Brenda remarked.
“Yeah, I wanna get this right.” Michelle replied.
“You do realise its after midnight?” Brenda asked.
“What? Ya kidding?” Chris laughed.
“Nope. Michelle has been up since 3am.” Brenda told him.
“3am! And ya still awake?” Chris remarked.
“Long day I know but it had to be done. Part of being in the biz.” Michelle replied.
“You bed now. His car will be fine here. I’m taking you home now, I will pick you up in the morning.” Brenda ordered Michelle.
“I will see you in the afternoon then. That’s an order.” Chris said to Michelle.

“So what is going on with you? You seem happier today than the other day? Brenda commented to Michelle on their way to Nick’s place.
“Nothing. Nothing you need knowing about. I’m fine.” Michelle smiled.
“The only thing I can think of is, it has to do with AJ or Nick.” Brenda said. Michelle blushed.
“So am I right? Now Nick or AJ?” Brenda egged on.
“It is one of them, yes.” Michelle replied.
“It’s Nick. I haven’t seen you this happy with AJ so it had to be Nick. What’s he done?” Brenda giggled.
“He kissed me, says he loves me.” Michelle giggled back.
“No way! Oh my god! Shell!” Brenda squealed as they arrived at Nick’s place, getting out of the car and going inside.
“I know.” Michelle replied.
“So what happened?” Brenda asked as they went into the kitchen. Michelle explained everything.

“WOW OH WOW! So what you gonna do?” Brenda asked.
“Well, naturally not much at the moment. We are laying low at the moment, Nick isn’t even telling anyone. Not his family, not even the guys. He’s keeping it secret, especially if AJ finds out, I mean, its only been about 2 weeks since we split for good.” Michelle explained.
“If AJ changed, would you? Would you go back to him?” Brenda asked.
“I don’t know, I seriously don’t know Bren.” Michelle sighed, cupping her drink and walked over to the kitchen table.

In the kitchen grabbing some lunch before Brenda was picking up Michelle, the house phone rang, Nick’s cell.
“Take it the place hasn’t burnt down. That’s good.” Nick joked when Michelle answered the phone.
“Haha funny! I have lived in a house on my own you know.” Michelle laughed.
“Man that was so long ago. Anyway, how are ya?” Nick asked.
“Yeah alright. Just grabbing some lunch before Brenda picks me up in a bit and go into the studio.” Michelle replied.
“Wait up...Brenda picks you up. Where’s my car?” Nick panicked.
“Geesh Nick! What do you take me for? I worked til midnight, Brenda didn’t want me driving home in ANY car.” Michelle replied.
“Midnight! You been up all that time. Over 24 hours! Shell ya worse than us!” Nick told her.
“A girl’s gotta do what she gotta do.” Michelle laughed.
“Man I feel bad for suggesting the all nighter.” Nick apologised.
“Don’t know what your talking about. You slept through most of it.” She laughed.
“Miss me?” He asked.
“Sure am. How are you and the guys?” Michelle replied.
“Stuffed as hell. Had turbulence across the Atlantic, that was fun. Brian didn’t think so.” Nick said.
“Aw, poor Bri.” Michelle replied.
“Don’t poor Bri. Should be poor me! I was sitting next to him and almost barfed on me!” Nick laughed.
“Aww, poor you but poor Bri. Poor guy.”Michelle answered.
“Yeah typical, feel more for the little guy.” Nick laughed.
“Hey, I gotta get going, Bren just pulled up. I’ll catch ya later alright. Have a good show or whatever is happening, whatever the time is over there.” Michelle said.
“Back at ya.” Nick replied and they got off the phone.

Back at the studio, Michelle worked with Chris, going over the routine, suggesting a few things differently to what Chris had in mind. All this physical work out, for Michelle at times got the better of her but venting out every so often, Chris helping her calm down and giving her advice on how to handle things. She took on his advice, something that when she spent time with the guys and their choreographer they never told her about. She just assumed that Michelle wouldn’t need one.

“Shell. What’s wrong?” Chris asked after Michelle stumbled after a dance move that she knew she should have been able to do.
“I’m just not that great with the dancing. I never thought that I would need to know dancing in my singing and stuff.” Michelle replied, stressed.
“It does take a while to get the hang of things and all. Say, didn’t Brenda say you were linked to Backstreet Boys?” Chris asked as he turned off the music, walking over to Michelle who was sitting down, her head face down, hands supporting her head.
“Yeah, I’m best friends with Nick. Why?” Michelle replied.
“You got their music here?” Chris asked.
“I can get it, in my office.” Michelle replied looking up at Chris.
“Go get it.” He said to her. In a few minutes, Michelle returned with her iPod and connecting speakers.
“Ok, let’s do this.” Chris said getting the ‘Everybody’ track. They danced a few times to it and Chris could see that Michelle knew the guys moves but not master her own.

“I got an idea. With some things we could take something out and enhance that with your dance.” Chris suggested putting her song back on, and working on a few ideas, Michelle looking on. After a few minutes, Chris came up with the perfect idea. Michelle and Chris worked with the new moves and she got the confidence to dance to it. “That’s better, much better!” Chris encouraged her applauding. It was about 8pm when they called it a day.

Michelle got home about 9pm after stopping off along the way and getting some groceries in that was needed for cooking dinner. After she finished cooking, eating dinner, putting everything away, it was midnight before she finally settled down and was able to relax for the night, in bed. As she was turning off the light, her phone rang.

“Evening you.” Nick said when she answered.
“Morning, its midnight here.” Michelle replied.
“Yeah same here, 8am. Ugh!” Nick groaned.
“Don’t blame me. You were the rang that rang me.” She laughed.
“I had to get you at a good time to call ya. 8am here.” Nick moaned, laying in bed, rubbing his spare hand on his face to wake up.
“Is it raining in London?” Michelle asked.
“I don’t know and I don’t wanna know.” He replied.
“How was the show last night?” Michelle asked.
“Good. Just like the other shows. How you been?” Nick replied rolling to the side of the bed that had a bottle of water and grabbed a sip.
“Yeah good. Wish I had all your guys genes and could dance. I’m a klutz.” Michelle laughed snuggling down in bed.
“Dancing? You dancing in your vid?” Nick asked.
“Yeah, had a shit of a day with it, dancing and all but Chris, the choreographer worked out a few things and I got it. Video gets done Friday. 24 hours and then fly out straight afterwards.” Michelle replied.
“The pressure of being one of us.” Nick laughed.
“Yeah, thanks!” Michelle said.
“Anytime. I miss ya so damn much.” Nick confessed.
“Me too, and all you guys as well. How’s AJ been with ya all?” Michelle asked.
“He’s been alright. Just don’t mention anything of what happened and it’s all god. And when it comes to press and all, Jen made it known that no one questions about relationships of any kind. You and AJ have just gone your separate ways but still friends...technically, that’s still true.” Nick replied.
“Mmm true. At least there is no tension between you all. I didn’t want that.” Michelle commented.
“Even if it were, it’s ok.” Nick told her as he got out of bed and turned on the TV.
“I still don’t like it.” Michelle said.
“Hey, Shell it’s alright. I swear there is nothing going on and all.” Nick assured her.
“Ok, ok.” Michelle replied.
“I gotta get going, some morning TV stuff. Love you.” Nick said.
“Love you too.” Michelle replied.

Back at the dance studio in the morning, Brenda came in with the dancers from So You Think You Can Dance for the first day of rehearsing. Chris and Michelle showed the dance to them with Chris showing the crew what they would be doing and then the people who were going to be doing some solo dancing mixed in with the group. Michelle thought she wouldn’t be staying to watch them but it turned out she did and she was glad. She was able to improve her dancing and the rehearsing for the video.

In between breaks Michelle found out that Danny had found a location in the suburbs of Los Angeles and from what Michelle saw, she liked it. She felt comfortable for the video shoot now. She was looking forward to it now.

Back home that night, early, Michelle began to start packing her back for when the tour would start for concerts in Canada so she wouldn’t be doing things at the last minute like Nick did. That was a disaster.

6am Friday morning Michelle arrived at the set already for the day. The street was cleared with the residents vacating, trucks in the streets, crews running around. Chris and Brenda were there and Chris wanted to be there for moral support for Michelle, as well as going through everything the final time before the shoot. Michelle had met the male and female that would be playing the lead in the video clip and were fantastic about everything.

Filming began about 8am, Michelle watching everything. Michelle was so involved in the process watching the filming that she didn’t realise that Aaron, Nick’s brother was standing beside her.

“What are you doing here?” Michelle asked Aaron as they hugged and walked away from the film crew who were on a break.
“Had some time off and Nick was telling me about your video shoot today so thought would come down here and see ya.” Aaron replied as they went to get a snack.
“More like, you take time off and come here and supervise me.” Michelle guessed.
“You know Nick.” Aaron laughed.
“Yeah, yeah I do. Dork head!” Michelle added.

“So how things going?” Aaron asked as they sat down on the kerb across the road for the house being used.
“Going good so far, still hard to believe this is all happening. Video shoot.” Michelle replied.
“First one is always daunting. And I was like was like 10 or something” Aaron said.
“Oh boy, that was so cute.” Michelle joked.
“Back then it was, man what were people thinking!” Aaron laughed putting his head down to laugh in embarrassment.
“Sometimes some of us have to be embarrassing to get somewhere.” Michelle reminded him.
“Yes, sometimes we do. Nick has had some of those and look where he is today.” Aaron said.
“Hey Shell, can you come here?” Brenda called out.
“Be back.” Shell said as she got up from the kerb and went over to Brenda.

“We got a little problem.” Danny told Michelle.
“What kind of little problem?” Michelle asked.
“Rachel has injured herself on set, rolled her leg and can’t walk. You will need to do it. Lucas has broken his leg.” Danny told her.
“Wow, are they gonna be alright?” Michelle asked concerned.
“Yeah, they’ll be fine, paramedics on their way now. We just need to know what you suggest for the video now?” Brenda replied.
“Gee, I don’t know now. I was hoping that Rachel and Lucas would be in it. The dance crew wouldn’t be able to do it. They are still going over their dance routine.” Michelle sighed.
“This may sound a crazy idea...but...what about Aaron?” Brenda asked.
“Aaron? You think?” Michelle remarked.
“Only one way to find out.” Brenda replied.
“I don’t think so.” Danny said.
“Danny, stop being picky.” Brenda snapped. Michelle couldn’t believe it.

Michelle and Brenda walked over to Aaron, still on the kerb, drinking a bottle of water.
“Hello.” Aaron said cautiously.
“Aaron, one artist to another. Friend to friend. Can you help us out?” Michelle asked.
“I knew you two were up to something.” Aaron laughed.
“Please Aaron. We are in crisis here. The main leads we had are on their way to hospital. One broken leg, the other rolled leg, mistook the table which is now moved.” Michelle begged.
“Mmmm yeah alright.” Aaron replied.
“THANKYOU SO MUCH!” Michelle exclaimed hugging Aaron.
“We owe ya.” Brenda assured him as she went off to go and do paperwork for Aaron. Michelle lead Aaron inside the house and showed him what they would be doing. Deep inside, Michelle thought her and Aaron doing it was more personal and it would come out better.

Michelle was right, going through each scene they did, it was electrifying. Danny changed his mind on how the two of them worked. In the past, Aaron and Michelle had fought and even briefly dated, despite Michelle being 5 years older than Aaron, Aaron cheating on Michelle while he was on tour.

The lighting, the scenes, the mood was perfect. A few takes needed to be done but without Aaron even knowing the song all that well it went great. About midnight the dance scenes began. “Good luck. You’ll be great.” Aaron encouraged Michelle as she finished the final scene with Aaron and Danny called it a wrap for that scene.

“As Michelle was getting her hair and make up done, Aaron stayed with her, taking photos. “You dare send them to Nick!” She told him.
“Who says I was sending them to Nick?” Aaron asked cheekily.
“You aren’t using it to put on twitter are you?” Michelle pleaded.
“Yup.” Aaron laughed.
“Aaron!” Michelle whined.
“Sorry, too late, done. Just wait now for the reviews to come in and the girls loving you and the guys drooling over you.” Aaron told her.
“Ever heard of the word revenge?” Michelle asked him.
“Baby, you will never plot revenge on me.” Aaron said.
“I’ve done it before.” Michelle replied.
“Oh yeah. Well this is now.” Aaron laughed.

Filming completely finished around 4am. Two hours earlier than everyone had thought. Danny would be taking the video back to get it cut and then would be sending Brenda a copy for her and Michelle to go through of what to take out, what to emphasise, close ups. Michelle and Brenda were heading to Vancouver first off. Michelle was going to be touring with Kelly Clarkson, opening up for her.

Arriving at the Sylvia Hotel in Vancouver and settling into the hotel late that afternoon, Brenda brought her laptop out and connected it to the internet to get the file from Danny of the video and they sat down and viewed the video together.
“No offence to Lucas and Rachel but you and Aaron belonged in that. It was like you had history there.” Brenda commented.
“Ah yeah.” Michelle replied.
“Wait, you and Aaron had history? No way!” Brenda shrieked.
“It wasn’t for long, happened years ago and Nick doesn’t know. No one does apart from Aaron and I and now you.” Michelle explained.
“No worries, secrets safe with me.” For the next hour they studied the video, wrote down suggestions and brought the ideas together.

“Kelly’s people are taking you to General Motors Place, I need to do some stuff here of organising things for you here and also get back to Danny by tonight LA time.

A few days later, Michelle was having lunch with Brenda at a cafe in Ottawa when Howie called her.
“I’m calling you because Nick is speechless.” Howie laughed.
“Why?” Michelle now laughing, putting down her sandwich.
“We are looking at the video and Nick is going ga ga for ya!” Howie laughed.
“So not true! He’s in loooove!” Brian laughed in the background.
“I’m loving it.” AJ called out. That was the main person Michelle was concerned about. AJ.
“Glad you guys love it. Aaron was a last minute. Had dramas on set and all. Pushed for time and money.” Michelle explained.
“I think it worked out better.” Brian commented getting on Howie’s phone.
“That’s what Brenda and Chris think. Danny in the end.” Michelle replied.
“Don’t tell me you had Danny Mans as director?” Brian asked.
“He seemed alright with everything.” Michelle replied.
“Shell, Shell, Shell. Oh man. He is not a good one. He wants everything glitzy and all and everything in the Hollywood area.” Brian informed her.
“As we discovered. Brenda told him to shut up a few times.” Michelle laughed.
“So she should’ve. Hey, Nick is wanting the phone. I love the vid!” Brian commented.
“Have a great show, miss ya!” Michelle replied.

“You and Aaron were smoking! Must be the Carter thing. We always steam peoples lives up.” Nick joked, the guys laughing in the background.
“God Nick. You sure love to have money on yourself don’t ya! It just happened and all. That’s it. By the way, thankyou for sending him over.” Michelle told him.
“What can I say? I am good. But awesome video. I loved it! What were you going on about the dancing?” Nick asked.
“That was earlier in the week. I had somewhat improved. How’s Sweden going for ya?” Michelle replied.
“Ah, ya know. Sweden is Sweden. It’s like our second home. Got Max coming tonight for the show and some of the writers. Afterwards we’re gonna go back to the studio and work on some new tracks.” Nick replied.
“Seriously you aren’t? You aren’t going back to the studio after doing the show?” Michelle asked.
“Yup. Part of life. Max and the guys are gonna be busy for a few days while we are here so this is our only opportunity.” Nick replied.
“Awww, you poor guys.” Michelle cooed.
“Yeah poor us.” He laughed. Not long after that, Nick had to go but just as Michelle hung up, she received a text message from Nick. “Man, when we see each other, I wanna get close to you big time! Love ya.” Nick wrote. Michelle just smiled and giggled.
“What now?” Brenda asked.
“Never you mind.” Michelle replied laughing, texting Nick back.

Touring with Kelly Clarkson was such a fantastic experience for Michelle. Kelly mentored her as much as Kelly could when she wasn’t busy with her own commitments. Michelle took every opportunity she could with Kelly. Kelly wanted to let Michelle know what it was like for a up and coming female solo artist.

Their final concert, 3 weeks later in Vancouver again, Michelle was backstage watching as she normally did when Kelly was closing the show. She wanted Michelle out on stage helping her finish the shows with Miss Independent and Since You Been Gone. Michelle didn’t know what was going on until the crew were fitting her with a mic and equipment.

“One final advice....HAVE FUN!” Kelly told Michelle as they parted ways down in the car park going back to their hotels.

Michelle was having a break from music, when the guys returned home a few months later. Michelle’s relationship with Nick and AJ had changed. Michelle and Nick became close, with Michelle and AJ becoming friends again and able to have a conversation. AJ supportive of her music career.

At the studio car park with Leigh, Leighanne and the kids, Michelle became nervous of what was going to happen. “When Dad coming?” Baylee asked Leighanne, holding her hand looking up.
“Anytime now.” Leighanne replied.
“I wonder if Howie caused trouble at customs again?” Leigh laughed.
“Oh boy, and from what I heard, he brought a bit.” Michelle reminded them.
“Good thing I brought the big car.” Leigh said. At that moment, the vans rolled in, the guys first, luggage behind them.
“Daddy!” Baylee and James shrieked. Brian and Howie looked at each other and laughed.
“Home!” They laughed. As they piled out of the car, they all came over to us, giving us hugs.

“Hey gorgeous.” AJ said coming up to me, arms around Michelle, hiding something from her.
“Hey, welcome home.” Michelle replied.
“Missed you.” He said pulling back handing her a single red rose.
“Missed you too.” Michelle could only reply, smiling accepting the rose and hugging him again, looking at Nick giving the look as to say, ‘what more could I do?’ Nick just shrugged.
“You look fantastic!” AJ commented.
“Thanks.” Michelle replied.

As Michelle drove back to Nick’s place, he remained quiet. “What’s wrong?” She asked him, even though she didn’t have to ask him, she knew.
“AJ, the rose, you.” Nick replied.
“I couldn’t do or say anything could I? You knew before all this, what the situation was.” Michelle replied.
“Yeah I suppose.” Nick sighed.
“It’s you I’ve come home with. These past few months have been great for you and I, I think and here we are.” Michelle said putting a hand on Nick’s knee as they were stopped at a set of traffic lights.
“Mainly because your stuff is here...well last I knew.” Nick replied.
“When we get back you will see.” Was all Michelle said as she continued driving, turning into the next street where Nick lived.
“Huh?” Nick asked. When Michelle drove in the driveway, she and Nick got out of the car, helping him with his luggage so it would only be the one trip from the car. Michelle had the day planned for Nick. No interruptions or anything.

They get inside, put his bags down and then he walks around the house, what Michelle knew he would do.
“The place has been quiet since you’ve been gone.” Michelle remarked as he walked upstairs, not far behind him.
“Can imagine. Place looks as though you haven’t been here.” Nick replied.
“I’ve been here, trust me.” Michelle told him.
“Sorry about before. Guess I was shocked at what AJ said.” Nick apologised as they stood at the top of the stairs, outside Nick’s bedroom.
“It’s alright. I understand. It was a shock. Especially for you as you were in the van with him.” Michelle replied as she put her arms around him.
“God I missed this.” Nick remarked his arms around her now. Melissa nestled into Nick more, feel safe and secure with him.
“Me too.” Michelle whispered. Nick let go of Michelle but held her hands. Nick guided her into his bedroom, Michelle following without hesitation.

Michelle had fantasised this moment for so long. She never thought she would be in this position, not even when she became friends with Nick. Their chemistry heated up many times leaving people to question whether Michelle and Nick were a couple rather than Michelle and AJ. Michelle and AJ had chemistry but when they were in the same room, the room heated up.

Nick closed his bedroom blinds overlooking the ocean, Michelle closing the bedroom door. Both had removed their jackets as it was a cool Los Angeles morning and were moving towards each other. Nick put his arms around Michelle and began to kiss her neck, side to side, Michelle letting go of her emotions and feelings, letting the moment last. In between Nick kissing her on the neck, they shared kisses, Michelle unbuttoning Nick’s shirt and Nick doing the same in reply. Both shirtless, Nick and Michelle laying down on the bed, Nick on top.

He kissed her down all the way to her jeans, Michelle removing them, Nick doing the same. His kisses on her body melted her, her sounds letting Nick know that she was enjoying this. Every so often Nick would raise his head to Michelle and they would kiss, Nick telling Michelle he loved her so much, Michelle saying the same thing. “I’m ready.” Michelle whispered to Nick.

As they lay in bed, Nick cuddling Michelle under the sheets, Nick stroked Michelle pecking her on the cheek, Michelle just grinned.
“What?” Nick asked.
“Nothing. Can’t I just smile?” Michelle replied turning herself around facing Nick.
“Well sure but this was just no ordinary smile.” Nick mentioned.
“Guess I just can’t believe that you and I would get this far.” Michelle said.
“Neither can I. I love it.” Nick replied giving Michelle a kiss.
“YO NICK! WHERE ARE YA BRO!” The voice yelled downstairs. Nick and Michelle looked at each other in shock.
“Shit, Aaron.” Nick said scrambling out of bed.
“Thank god I shut the door huh!” Michelle giggled as she saw Nick scramble looking for his clothes to put in.
“I knew you were good for something.” Nick said as he put on his shirt unbuttoned, a hand through his hair and kissed Michelle before going downstairs. Michelle laid there for a few minutes collecting her thoughts and got properly dressed before going downstairs, closing Nick’s bedroom behind her.

“Where you come from?” Aaron asked as Michelle came down the stairs, Nick and Aaron in the kitchen making something to eat.
“Upstairs.” Michelle replied ruffling his hair.
“Hey! I told you, no more ruffling of the hair from you. I banned you from that when I turned 18!” Aaron laughed fixing his hair up.
“Hey, I am older than you. I can do what I damn well like.” Michelle replied.
“Same goes for me.” Nick added putting Aaron in a headlock and scruffing his hair even more.
“Oh geez!” Aaron moaned putting his head down on the table, arms covering his head.
“Awww we mess up your hair did we?” Nick cooed laughing at Aaron.
“No.” Aaron sulked jokingly.

“So what’s new with you?” Michelle asked putting all the stuff back in the fridge.
“Nothing much. In between recordings at the moment so thought would come here and hang out with my favourite brother since he got back today.” Aaron replied as they all walked outside onto the patio.
“Oh oh...this don’t sound good.” Michelle said.
“I’m with you...what do you want?” Nick asked Aaron.
“What? Can’t a brother come and see his brother the day he gets back from Europe? “ Aaron innocently replied.
“Nupe. You want something. What do you want me to do?” Nick told him sighing.
“Help with the song I’m recording this afternoon.” Aaron said.
“Aaron!” Nick whined.
“Please! I wouldn’t be so desperate but I am in a tight situation. Tommy and Mark aren’t wanting to work anymore on this song anymore. Believe there is nothing that can be done to it but I believe there can be.” Aaron replied.
“What you mean?” Michelle asked.
“We got the tempo for the song, that’s fine. I’m believing there should be backing vocals by someone else, both Tommy and Mark don’t think so. They believe my backing vocals is all they need.” Aaron informed Nick and Michelle.
“You got the track here obviously?” Nick sighed, giving in.
“Right here in my little pocket.” Aaron replied grinning getting the CD out of his pants pocket waving it in Nick’s face.
“Why me? I’m not even home for 12 hours and you do this to me! Come on.” Nick sighed as he got up and went down into the basement.
“I wasn’t interrupting anything was I?” Aaron asked as they were all going down into the basement, Nick’s studio.
“No.” Michelle replied.
“Yes.” Nick replied at the same time.
“Ok...gotcha!” Aaron laughed as they sat around the control deck.

“Well?” Aaron asked as they listened to what Aaron had sung.
“Tommy and Mark said you needed no one else?” Nick replied as he leaned back in his chair.
“That’s what they said.” Aaron said.
“What about female vocals? I think it would go down well. Like a female rocker?” Michelle replied.
“Name a female rocker that would sing this at the drop of the hat?” Aaron asked Michelle.

Aaron went through the sheet music with Michelle for the song. Nick was doing his bits for the track of going through things and setting things up, watching Michelle work with Aaron. Never in his wildest dreams would he see his brother work with Nick’s lover. This was the best, even if it broke their reunion. Three hours later, they had finished the song. Michelle had been hanging with Aaron at the studio and heard the song and she knew some of the song already.

“Thanks so much for helping me out! Life Savers!” Aaron said as he left about dinner time, the sun setting in Los Angeles.
“Don’t forget to mention us in the album.” Nick replied as they all hugged each other at the front door when Aaron was leaving.
“Don’t worry, be right up the top!” Aaron laughed as he walked out.

“Now where we were we?” Nick asked as Michelle closed the door, Nick putting his arms around her.
“I think about here.” Michelle smiled as they began to kiss.

Next morning, everyone was catching up with each other at Brian’s place for a BBQ lunch. It was something they always did after a tour, the day they get back from tour or day after seeing family and friends, all would catch up. When Michelle and Nick arrived, all noticed a change in the both of them.

“You going to be alright with AJ there?” Nick asked as they were walking up the driveway, not holding hands, remaining as friends.
“Yeah sure, we are fine now, back to being friends.” Michelle replied.
“I mean being in the same area as him for more than 10 minutes?” Nick asked.
“I’m fine, it’s all up to him.” Michelle replied as she rang the doorbell.

In the backyard Baylee and James were running around on the grass, Brian and Howie laughing at them playing tag, while they were at the BBQ. Leighanne and Leigh were in the kitchen preparing the salads. “Where’s AJ?” Nick asked as he hugged the girls.
“He’s on his way, had to stop off and do a couple of things on the way.” Leighanne replied.
“Ah ok cool.” Michelle replied interested, showing the girls that she had no ill feelings for AJ and she had moved on.
“Hey Nick, can you take these out to the big boys and these to the little boys.” Leigh asked as she got out some drinks from the fridge. Getting them Nick went outside to Howie and Brian carrying the drinks, the boys racing up to Nick.

“Alright, now that Nick is gone, we can tell you the truth. We wanted to tell you before he arrived.” Leighanne said sitting me down on the kitchen bench stool.
“What?” Michelle asked.
“It’s AJ. Brian was telling me last night that since you split and before the tour, he has been friends with his woman. He’s bringing her today. We just wanted to give you the heads up.” Leigh told Michelle.
“Does Nick know about this woman?” Michelle asked.
“Yeah he does. She came out on tour for a few days while they were in Germany. She had family out there and was already planning to see them so she joined them.” Leighanne replied.
“Mmm, interesting...strange he never told me yesterday or today.” Michelle commented.
“Must have slipped his mind. You know what Nick can be like when he gets back from tour. Going a million miles an hour while sleepy.” Leigh said.
“Haha yeah.” Michelle laughed, smiling knowing that they weren’t doing that much talking yesterday. Not long after Michelle was told all this, the girls all went outside. AJ and his female friend, Sally arrived soon after.

When Sally arrived, Michelle had an eye on Nick and also on AJ and Sally to see what the reactions would be. Nick looked at Michelle as to say, I forgot. AJ introduced Sally to Michelle and two of them talked a while, AJ going over to the kids giving them hugs and then going to the guys.

“Sally seems nice.” Michelle commented and Nick drove home later that day.
“Shell, I’m sorry! I didn’t know he was bringing her. He didn’t mention it.” Nick apologised.
“When were you or anyone going to tell me about her?” Michelle asked.
“I thought AJ would have mentioned something when you were talking and all. I can’t remember everything and tell everything. Not a mind reader.” Nick explained.
“You think with the history AJ and I have, you might have wanted to make sure I knew?” Michelle wanted to know.
“I said I’m sorry. What more do you want me to say? What do you want me to do?” Nick asked angry.
“I don’t know alright. It’s over and done with. At least Leigh and Leighanne warned me before we went outside.” Michelle replied.
“God damn it Shell. I’m trying here.” Nick sighed.
“Who said anything about trying? Was yesterday trying? Trying to woo me into your arms instead of finding myself about Sally?” Michelle yelled at him.
“No, no way. Shell you know how much I god damn love you.” Nick replied as he drove in the drive way to his place.
“Nick, will you stop saying that. It’s irritating me. You know how I feel.” Michelle shrieked at him as they got inside in the living room.
“You could have stopped yesterday too you know. It wasn’t all just me.” Nick retaliated back.
“If you had loved me and known me, you would have known that I’m mixed up at the moment.” She yelled back.
“We were gone for 3 months! You had more than enough time. We were wanting me as someone on the side?” Nick yelled.
“That what you think? You think I wanted you for something on the side waiting for AJ to come back to me?” Michelle shrieked heading upstairs to her bedroom.

“Oh, that is so mature. Go on, pack your bags. Run away somewhere.” Nick yelled from the bottom of the stairs.
“Who says I am running away? Maybe I want to be in the room.” Michelle fired back.
“You going to be human and work this out?” Nick asked now in the room.
“I just thought you could have been human, been a friend, that’s all and tell me. Instead I find out months later when you are all back and have a chummy BBQ. I thought you understood me Nick. Some courtesy or something wouldn’t have gone astray when you were on tour.” Michelle told Nick.
“I’m sorry. I will shout it from the mountain tops. From outer space. I’m sorry.” Nick stressed out. Michelle had to calm down. “I’m sorry.” He apologised repeatedly, moving closer in on her as he felt her calm down.
“Don’t do it again alright?” Michelle made Nick promise.
“I swear.” Nick promised a hand out in the air then they hugged.

A week later Michelle was back in the studio rehearsing for her tour when plans changed suddenly. There was no tour. Finances were preventing it and the sales on her album weren’t helping her. Tickets were hardly selling. Brenda and management were having to let people go. Brenda was nearly broke herself. Michelle was heartbroken at the news of what was happening. She was becoming a has been. Michelle couldn’t go back to Nick or see anyone as she was embarrassed to see them in their successes.

Leaving the studio in her car, which fortunately she owned outright so she didn’t have pay back, she drove down to the highway and just drove. She didn’t care where she was going. She just wanted to get out there and be on her own. She drove and drove thinking about everything that was going on with her phone off so she wouldn’t be interrupted. She just wanted to collect her thoughts on her own.

Michelle arrived in Sacramento around dinner time, some 5 hours from leaving Los Angeles when she needed to refuel her car. She thought she would go into the diner and grab some dinner before deciding what she should do.
Waiting for her meal, there was a small TV in the far corner of where she was sitting and was just able to hear the TV. It was TMZ.
“AJ McLean of Backstreet Boys was seen out at Area Night Club with a woman, insiders are claiming to be his new flame after Michelle Watson. Insiders claim that McLean’s new woman, is a photographer from San Francisco. They met not long after McLean and Watson became a couple. No word as to what Watson or the Backstreet camp have to say.” The reporter stated.
Michelle didn’t want to think of what people would say. But then again, TMZ have been pretty much right on things before. She didn’t want to give into temptation.

As the next program began, The Insider, the headlines mentioned AJ and Sally. She wanted to see what they said. The show actually showed a photo of AJ and Sally in a deep kiss, like how she and AJ used to be. Without fuss, Michelle paid for her meal with tip and went back into her car. She wanted to turn on her phone to see what was being said on the internet but if she had done that, her phone would have been constantly ringing. Michelle saw a payphone.

“Brenda, it’s Shell. I need to know what’s going on.” Michelle said.
“Where are you? We are all worried about you.” Brenda asked.
“I don’t want to say. I need time out. I just want to know if the reports about AJ and Sally are true. As my manager/friend/confidant, please tell me.” Michelle replied.
“Nick confirmed it today for me, when I called him this afternoon not long after you left. AJ confirmed it to the guys this morning. AJ and Sally are a couple.” Brenda informed her.
“Ok, thanks. I will call soon. I’m on a payphone and someone wants to use it. Didn’t want to use my phone. Tell everyone I am ok. I just need to be by myself.” Michelle replied and hung up not letting Brenda say anything more.

Michelle sat in the car, wondering where to go. Getting dark, she didn’t want to go anywhere she hadn’t been before so instead she drove back to LA. But wasn’t going straight home to Nick’s. She just wanted to be at the beach. Venice Beach.

The drive back, she was trying to clear her head even more but the thought of Sally and AJ together, tore Michelle apart. Michelle really wanted to be with AJ, even more than she wanted to be with Nick. Michelle and AJ belonged together. Aside from his smoking and his tattoos, Michelle and AJ had everything in common.

Halfway between Sacramento and Los Angeles, she pulled over to a payphone and checked her voice messages. A lot from Nick pleading to call her, AJ calling to confirm, Brian and Howie “saying how are ya”. Michelle knowing to well that they were wanting to find out and all.

Arriving in Los Angeles just before sunrise Michelle got a perfect car park at Venice Beach and sat on top of the car bonnet, a blanket covering her. Whenever Michelle needed to think, her thinking was done at the beach. She could only come to one conclusion. Sally and AJ were soul mates. Michelle and AJ weren’t soul mates.

Michelle opened her eyes. She didn’t know where she was. Michelle’s eyes focused a bit more to realise she was somewhere strange. “AJ.” Michelle called turning her head from side to side on her pillow.
“It’s Rok here. How you doing?” Brian asked looking down on her, standing side of her bed.
“What happened? Where am I?” Michelle asked.
“You had an accident but you are alright. Everything is alright.” Brian replied, holding her hand. A nurse soon came in and took observations and left Brian and Michelle alone.

“Why Shell?” Brian asked worried. Michelle couldn’t bear to look at Brian.
“Sally. She and AJ are soul mates. I can see that. I saw it at your place.” Michelle replied turning her head round back to facing the window.
“AJ doesn’t know what he is doing. We all know that AJ belongs with you. Even Kevin can tell that Sally is just a rebound.” Brian told her.
“Not from where I am looking.” Michelle quietly replied.
“Why didn’t you come to us when everything happened?” Brian asked. Michelle didn’t reply. Tears were streaming down her face. She wasn’t in the mood to see anyone.

Two hours later after Brian left, Nick walked in. The second last person she wanted to see. Seeing Nick’s face, how he was, Michelle couldn’t look at him but Nick wasn’t going to let that deter him. He just wanted to see Michelle. “I’ll camp out here every day if I have to. You are going to talk to me at some stage.” Nick told her an hour later after he arrived. Michelle turned to look at him. “That’s better.” He smiled.

“I don’t know what to say.” Michelle whispered to him as she sat up in the bed.
“You don’t need to. No need to say anything.” Nick replied as he sat on the bed and held her.
“If it wasn’t for the two blows in the one day, my career over basically and then with AJ and Sally I don’t think I would be like this.” Michelle said.
“Career over? What?” Nick asked shocked.
“Yeah. I thought Brenda would have told you. Especially by now.” Michelle replied.
“She’s mentioned nothing. When she called the other day she was just wondering where you were.” Nick told her.
“Hmm, weird, that’s not like Brenda.” Michelle commented.
“Not that it matters but where did you go?” Nick asked.
“Sacramento.” Michelle replied.
“Wow. And you drove back almost straight back?” Nick remarked.
“Yeah. I called her on a payphone there. I didn’t tell her where I was or anything.” Michelle told Nick.
“The main thing is that you are alright. We’ll get through this.” Nick assured her.
“What you talking about?” Michelle asked Nick.

“How you ended up here? You tried to take your life?” Nick asked shocked.
“Nick, I didn’t take my life. I don’t know how I got here. I was watching the sunrise and then I woke up here a few hours later. Simple as that.” Michelle told him.
“But we were told you attempted...”Nick began to say confused.
“Nick, I may be down, but I certainly didn’t commit suicide, well attempted. I’m not that bad.” Michelle retorted back at him.
“Oh god...Shell.” Nick apologised.
“What?” Michelle asked worried.
“Nothing, I’ll be back, I’m gonna call the guys and let them know.” Nick said and walked out the room.

Suicide! Suicide! Michelle couldn’t believe it. While Nick was gone, Michelle called the nurse in and asked for information on what happened, the truth. The nurse rambled on things of how I was presented to the Emergency Department, tests I had.
“Did you test me for any toxins in my body? Drugs?” Michelle asked. Michelle was soon having blood tests done.

“They didn’t check me out for drugs!” Michelle exclaimed as Nick walked in as the nurse was finishing up.
“Isn’t that normally a first thing you check for?” Nick asked the nurse but she didn’t reply.
“How are the guys?” She asked Nick as he got back on the bed with Michelle.
“Relieved to hear that you are alright considering, Brian especially. They all think we should call the cops. If you didn’t do what you did and you have no idea and all.” Nick replied.
“Poor Bri. I wasn’t exactly friendly with him.” Michelle said.
“He is fine. Just glad you are alright. AJ too.” Nick said.
“I’ll see him soon.” Michelle replied.

In the few days that Michelle was in the hospital, AJ didn’t come and see her. She didn’t expect to see him but it would have been nice as everyone went and saw her, including Baylee and James who drew her pieces of artwork.

When Michelle was being released from hospital, it was Nick who was there for her. Michelle couldn’t believe on how much Nick had changed since everything happened earlier in the week. She had found out that Nick had taken the day off work as when she was talking to Howie he mentioned that they were needed in the studio for a meeting to talk about the new direction they were heading into for the new album. Michelle was furious at Nick for taking the day off work but Nick cared too much for Michelle and he was going to at home having the meeting by conference call in his office.

“Nick, I was wondering if you could do a slight detour on the way back home?” Michelle asked him as they were leaving the hospital.
“Sure, where you wanna go?” Nick replied paying the cashier to leave the hospital car park.
“Venice Beach.” Michelle simply told him. Nick didn’t question her.
In the car park at Venice Beach, Michelle got out of the car, Nick staying in the car, watching her as she walked on by and collected her thoughts.
“Alright?” Nick asked when she got back in the car about 20 minutes later.
“Yup fine. Thanks.” She replied smiling at him.

Back at their place, it felt surreal. She had intended to be out on her own but because of how her career was, she was penniless, almost sleeping out in the car. Nick said to Michelle that she could stay for as long as she liked.

Settling in back home, it took its toll in Michelle and she went and laid down on her bed, Nick telling her that he had to go into his office and do the phone conference. “You go in there, still time. I’ll be fine. I’ll be resting anyway. Not doing any major.” She told him. Nick was hesitant.
“You need me, you call me.” He told her sternly, giving her a hug and then he left.

While Nick was gone for the few hours, Michelle just slept. She never realised on how tiring going from the hospital to home could be. She had never been this tired but the week was quite eventful and full on so she thought that this was her way her body was letting her know that she was to take things easy but she wanted to do something.

Around lunchtime, Michelle had some energy and she made herself some lunch and went outside on the top balcony and had her lunch, enjoying the sunshine. The weather had been fantastic of late and she was taking every opportunity. While she was having lunch, Leighanne called over to see how she was with Baylee.

“I’m doing alright, I’ve learnt a few things these past few days and taking each day as it comes.” Michelle told Leighanne as they looked down at Baylee running around on the grass.
“Have you heard from Brenda?” Leighanne asked.
“Nope. Not since I last called her when I was in Sacramento. The guys are telling me to call the cops but I don’t want to. So much stuff has happened.” Michelle replied.
“Maybe some justice might be done. You wouldn’t be alone.” Leighanne suggested to her, placing a hand on top of Michelle’s.
“This may sound weird but even though I am not physically alone as I have you all, I feel as though I am alone. It’s weird.” Michelle explained.
“After everything I don’t blame you. But just remember, we are all here for you, even AJ.” Leighanne replied.
“Hmm, funny that, I haven’t seen or spoken to him.” Michelle commented.
“He blames himself.” Leighanne said.

“What? How does he blame himself? Someone attacked me. Simple as that.” Michelle asked shocked as she and Leighanne went down the stairs to watch Baylee more.
“He says that if he had told you first off, before all of us the other day, you wouldn’t have driven to Sacramento.” Leighanne replied.
“He, or no one knew what would be happening to me.” Michelle said.
“We’ve tried telling him that. Even Sally and she doesn’t know you that much.” Leighanne added.
“When Nick comes home, I’ll call AJ. Think we need to talk. Just why am I the one to make the first move?” Michelle decided burying her head.
“We always are. Men are so I don’t know.” Leighanne laughed.
“Nick!” Baylee shrieked a few minutes later running up to him, Michelle and Leighanne turning their heads around to see Nick closing the sliding door from the kitchen to the patio.

“Hey kiddo.” Nick replied giving him a high five, picking him up and sitting down on a chair next to Leighanne.
“How were things?” Leighanne asked Nick.
“Good. All the normal mumbo jumbo post tour stuff, profits up and all. Talk about the new album.” Nick replied.
“And what will the new album be like?” Michelle asked.
“It’s gonna be interesting. I will say that. A whole new different approach.” Nick replied.
“Mmmm interesting.” Michelle said.
“Yeah it is.” Nick replied.
“Come on Bay, we gotta get going. You got karate.” Leighanne told Baylee.
“Aww Mom.” Bay whined.
“I’m not going anywhere Bay, I’ll be here for a while. You can see me anytime.” Nick said as Baylee got off Nick’s knee.
“Alright. Bye.” Baylee said giving Nick and Michelle both hugs.

“How ya been?” Nick asked Michelle as they were cleaning up the dishes from lunch.
“Yeah good. As you can tell, I took it easy.” Michelle replied as she was loading the dishes in the dishwasher.
“Good. Way it should be. Take it easy and chill.” Nick told her.
“Can’t do nothing else.” Michelle sighed.
“You alright?” Nick asked as they went into the living room.
“Just been thinking that’s all.” Shell replied.
“Been thinking about what?” Nick asked.

“About everything. Since I met you, and started in the business, I’ve been putting my heart and soul into my music. Because of that, apart from you and everyone you know, I don’t have anyone else. I thought Brenda was someone different, get me back out there and all but turns out she wasn’t. I live in a solitude world.” Michelle explained as they sat on the couch.
“That’s what the business is. While you are successful, you lose a lot of things and people. It is hard but you will get back on top again.” Nick assured Michelle, giving her a hug.
“Just doesn’t feel like it. I know it will happen, maybe again down the track but maybe I need a new direction. I just need something.” Michelle went on.
“It will be alright. I promise you.” Nick whispered as he held her tight and they sat in silence.

That night when Nick was on the phone to one of his sisters, Michelle got up the courage to call AJ. She just needed to hear that.
“Hey, how you doing?” AJ asked when he answered.
“Yeah going good. I haven’t interrupted you have I? Not having dinner?” She replied as she sat on the bed in her room.
“No, no, it’s all good. Having a late one as Sally has a photo shoot out of town and doesn’t know how long she’ll be.” AJ replied.
“She sounds nice.” Michelle said, knowing it killed her to say that.
“Yeah she is. You and Nick will have to come over in the next couple of days and meet her properly. Do a double date or something.” AJ suggested.
“Yeah we’ll see, I’ll let him know.” Michelle replied.
“You two are a...” AJ began to say, not knowing what to say.
“Honestly, I don’t know. Close friends but that’s about it, he may think otherwise.” Michelle replied.
“I thought you were.” AJ said.
“We’re just going with the flow at the moment.” Michelle told him.
“Ah ok, that’s cool.” AJ replied.
“I think you and I need to have a talk. Don’t you agree?” Michelle asked him.
“About what?” AJ said confused.
“About you and I. I think there are some mixed messages going around.” Michelle explained.
“You wanna meet up or something?” AJ asked.

Half hour later, AJ and Michelle met up at The World Cafe in Santa Monica to talk about things. It was a quiet night so they knew they wouldn’t have any problems.
“I’ve forgiven you for what you’ve done but will never forget.” Michelle told him straight out after the waitress brought us coffees over to them.
“I don’t know why I did it. I don’t know why it was just you that I was serious about, that I cheated on. Went behind your back. I have thought about it and I can’t come up with any answers. I guess I was jealous because of how close you were with Nick and if I did something you would be happy with him and I could move on with someone new.” AJ explained.
“It may look to people we are more than just good friends but there is hardly anything going on. We are just that, good friends, close but not that close.” Michelle replied.
“I loved us being together. We were great. We clicked. We finished each other sentences. We sensed when something was wrong, even if we weren’t together.” AJ commented.
“We ARE great. We still finish each other sentences and still have that sense. The only thing we aren’t anymore is lovers. You have found your soul mate with Sally and that’s fantastic.” Michelle encouraged.
“Sally and I soul mates? You think?” AJ asked.
“Yeah, we all do. There are certain people that can be lovers but when you have a soul mate that’s even special. We aren’t soul mates. We were good lovers.” Michelle smiled at him.
“Sally and I were wanting to tell you first, about she and I together but everything came up and then when we were going to tell you, you were at the studio so we told the guys and then I called you and left a message on your phone.” AJ said.
“AJ, you aren’t to blame for what happened on Tuesday. If I didn’t drive to Sacramento nothing would have happened. We live in a land of if’s. What if I, etc. This was just a accident.” Michelle tried to convince AJ.
“With the news that didn’t make you drive over there?” He asked.
“No...it was more the fact that I was amongst successful people and here I am, a flop. A has been.” Michelle replied.
“Has been? Flop? Shell you aren’t.” AJ said.
“Well why has the tour been cancelled, no tickets selling, my manager bankrupting herself and almost me?” Michelle asked him.
“I don’t know all that, you are incredible. One of the reasons why I fell in love with you. You are amazing. I remember the first time I met you all those years ago.” He replied.
“That was then. This is now. I’m going to have to do something. I can’t stay at Nick’s all the time and I need to do something.” Michelle stressed out.
“You will find something. You will get back out there. I can assure you. You have my word.” AJ told her.
“What makes you think you can be so sure?” She asked.
“Because I know you. You never know what may happen.” He replied smiling at her.
“You know something don’t you?” Michelle asked coy.
“Nope, I know nothing. I don’t I swear.” AJ replied, his hands up pleading innocence.
“But we are good, aren’t we? Back on track again?” Michelle asked.
“Course we are.” AJ replied as he got out of his seat and sat next to Michelle, giving her a hug.

When Michelle got back home, Nick was in the living room, sitting on the couch channel surfing when she walked in, Nick half glancing at the TV and half glancing at the door.
“You alright?” He asked worried getting up quickly.
“Yeah fine, just worked things out with AJ. We’re good. Nothing to worry about.” Michelle replied smiling.
“Really?” He asked.
“Yup, all that is in the past now. Everything is fine.” She assured him.

Three months had gone by and things were on improving for Michelle. She and Nick tried to be a couple but they couldn’t and decided to remain close friends. Michelle managed to find a cheap apartment in Santa Monica not far from the beach. Michelle was starting back in the music business, Howie as her manager. AJ and Sally were expecting their first child, no one had expected, especially AJ. As Sally was pregnant, he wanted to do the right thing and marry her and were getting married in a few weeks time. Nick was flirting with one girl at the studio trying to get her attention but she wasn’t giving into him. Brian thought this was so funny.

Michelle had arrived at the studio an hour earlier than she needed to, to see the guys recording. Howie was going to be with her recording demo’s after they had finished. When she walked in the recording room when the red light went off, AJ and Brian were at the control deck.
“Hey gorgeous.” Brian said to her.
“Brian come on.” She whined.
“No go on, ya sexy mama.” AJ laughed.
“If you weren’t my best friend.” Michelle joked back throwing a cushion at him, hitting AJ in the face.
“How ya been?” Brian asked as she sat next to him leaning back in the chair.
“Going good. Rachel says to call her. You owe her big time apparently.” Michelle replied.
“Oh oh. She remembered!” Brian gasped.
“What’s this?” AJ asked.
“Brian and Rachel were out the other day, looking for something for Leighanne and he wanted her opinion. When Rachel got home, Mark thought that she was seeing Brian on the side with how Brian and Rach walked back in her place laughing and carrying on.” Michelle explained.
“When was the last time you were like that?” AJ laughed.
“Oh gosh, I don’t know but you had to be there when it happened. As Rach got out of the car she misjudged the step, landing face first on the grass, from what we could tell, not long after Dodger did his business. I help her up and she brings me down, narrowly missing it. Then as we try and get up, her kids, Carrie and Samantha come out and hose us down for some reason and leave the hose on the ground. We trip over it and land back down on the grass again, laughing nonstop. When we get up, we’re holding each other and she struggles to open the door still laughing and Mark is there to greet us.” Brian explained trying not to laugh.
“And you say Nick is the klutz!” AJ laughed.
“What’s this about me being a klutz? What did I do?” Nick asked confused.
“Nick, we take back everything we said about you being a klutz.” Brian laughed uncontrollably now. By now Howie was in the room as well. Just about to start another conversation when AJ’s phone rang.

AJ’s face lost it’s colour almost instantly. “AJ what’s wrong man?” Howie asked as AJ got off the phone. AJ couldn’t speak.
“AJ?” Brian asked looking directly at him.
“It’s Sal. She’s dead.” AJ simply said. Everyone looked shocked.
“AJ, what you talking about? I was just talking to her an hour ago. She was fine.” Michelle asked.
“Her mom just called. At Cedars-Sinai Medical Centre.” AJ replied.
“I’ll take ya.” Nick said as he got up, grabbing his keys from his jean pocket. The rest of us were in shock.

“All go back and wait at AJ’s?” Howie suggested.
“Think we’re better off staying away. Nick will call if he needs us.” Brian replied quietly.
“I better go home and tell Leigh. Don’t want her finding out over the phone.” Howie said.
“Yeah, I better do the same.” Brian added.
“Want me to look after Baylee for a bit?” Michelle asked.
“Ah, thanks but he’s over at a sleep over or something.” Brian vaguely replied.

Driving home, the tears streamed down Michelle’s face. Sally and Michelle had only just gotten close and went baby shopping on the weekend.
Sitting out on the small balcony she had upstairs her phone rang.
“AJ is wanting you. We’re at his place.” Nick said.
“Be there in 5.” Michelle replied.

Five minutes later, true to her word, Michelle was there. Nick opened the door and she saw AJ as she walked in. He was in the living room sunk in the couch holding a photo of he and her together, the latest photo of the sonogram on top of the photo. Michelle’s sonogram was only done a week earlier. Five months pregnant.

“What happened?” Michelle whispered.
“From what I can gather, she was on a movie set doing stills for someone, I don’t know the full story. Anyway, there was some accident and she was injured. She was in the firing line more or less.” Nick replied quietly as they looked at AJ.
“Oh god.” Michelle said shocked.
“You’ll be alright?” Nick asked.
“Yeah fine. Thanks.” She replied, hugging him.
“I’ll see ya later alright AJ.” Nick called out to AJ, AJ not responding.

Michelle didn’t say anything, just sat down next to him, AJ collapsing in her arms, his heart breaking. He couldn’t speak. She didn’t like to him this way. AJ just cried until he could cry no more. AJ cried until he fell asleep. His Mom was flying in, in the morning from Florida. Michelle stayed with AJ the whole time, not wanting to leave him alone. When AJ laid on the couch, she grabbed the duvet from his bedroom and laid it on top of him.

Michelle stayed in the kitchen overlooking the living room at AJ, keeping things quiet. She had text messages from the guys seeing how things were. AJ just continued to sleep into the night. Michelle couldn’t bear to leave him.

Around midnight, AJ stirred. “You still here?” He asked walking in the kitchen.
“Yeah still here. Didn’t want to leave you alone.” Michelle replied as he hugged her.
“Thanks.” He said going to the fridge.
“Anything you want me to do?” She asked.
“Don’t leave me.” He begged as he closed the fridge taking a sip of water.
“I won’t.”Michelle whispered.

When AJ’s Mom turned up following morning, AJ was asleep. “How has he been?” Denise asked as they hugged at the entry to the house.
“Not long gone back to sleep again. He woke up at midnight, we talked and gone to sleep in the last hour or so.” Michelle replied.
“He was so looking forward to everything.” She sighed.
“Yeah, I think he has the latest sonogram on his phone and he kept looking at it. I think he was looking forward to getting married more so than Sally. Move over Bridezilla, AJ is Groomzilla.” Michelle ended up with a small laugh.
“You look as though you haven’t slept.” Denise commented as they were in the kitchen making coffee.
“Hard not to.” Michelle replied tilting her head towards the bedroom where AJ slept.

Getting home eventually, Michelle felt empty. She didn’t know what to do. She felt helpless not being able to do anything. She only knew of one thing, to go running on the treadmill. She ran and ran to almost the point of where she collapsed. Saving her from doing that, Michelle just managed to be hear the doorbell.

“Hey!” Howie said as she opened the door.
“Hey how you doing? Be back in a sec, just take a quick shower.” Michelle replied and then got in the shower.
“Feel better?” Howie asked as she came back in the living area.
“Yeah, nothing like a good run. How’s things?’ Michelle replied grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, Howie already having one.
“Yeah not bad. Leigh can’t believe it but she’s doing alright.” Howie said.
“Yeah, I spent all night with AJ. Denise is with him now.” Michelle mentioned.
“You been with AJ all this time?” Howie asked concerned.
“Yeah, when Nick called me I was there like no more than 5 minutes. He doesn’t want to be alone.” Michelle replied.
“Can ya blame him?” Howie commented.
“Nope.” Michelle sighed. After a few moments of silence, Howie brought up about work.

A few days later was the funeral of Sally and their child Alexandra. Sally always liked the name and AJ wanted to honour that. Between Nick, Howie and Brian we organised something for the funeral. We were all going to sing, acapella of Never Gone. They had never done it before and they couldn’t think of a better opportunity for this.

AJ sat between Denise and Michelle, AJ holding onto my hand. As the service was about to finish, Michelle let go on AJ’s hands, smiled and the guys and all stood up. At the end when everyone was outside, AJ thanked them so much for doing it. Sally and Alexandra were being cremated privately at the request of her parents and the wake was at their place.

Later that afternoon, when Nick was driving Michelle back to her apartment, they didn’t speak.
“You alright?” Nick asked looking at her undoing a couple of buttons from his shirt.
“Just concerned for AJ like everyone is.” Michelle sighed looking out the window.
“He’ll be right. Now that the funeral is over he will start again. We’ll all be there.” Nick replied.
“Yeah I know.” Michelle whispered.

Just as Michelle was heading to bed that night, AJ called her. “Didn’t know who to call. Mom’s just gone back to Florida, she had some convention thing on she couldn’t get out of and the guys would be busy.” AJ said.
“It’s alright. You wanna come over here?” Michelle asked.
“Can I?” AJ replied.
“Sure. I’ll see you in a few.” Michelle said.

When AJ arrived, the only thing she knew on what AJ wanted was to be cheered up by food and listening to rock music in the background and talking.
“No one knew this but we were going to cancel the wedding.” AJ blurted out saying into the night when things quietened down.
“What? What was going on?” Michelle asked.
“Swear never to tell anyone?” AJ spoke looking at Michelle.
“Yeah course.” Michelle replied.
“Alexandra wasn’t mine. Sally went behind my back. When we were looking at the scan last week, the Dr was measuring and she was 6 months pregnant. We didn’t start having sex til a month later.” AJ explained. Michelle didn’t know what to say. Karma.
“Oh my god, AJ I’m so sorry.” Michelle apologised.
“Guess you could say karma bites you on the ass.” AJ commented.
“Pretty big karma. That’s shallow.” Michelle replied.
“Guess I sort of know how you felt when I did the cheating.” AJ said.
“AJ don’t. You don’t need to do this.” Michelle told him, a hand on his arm.
“Being done once is hard enough but all the times I did to you.” AJ went on.
“AJ, it’s alright. It’s over now.” She assured him. Michelle had a look in her eye that she wasn’t aware of that she wanted to be back with AJ but it was naturally too soon with AJ. AJ must have sensed what her eyes were telling him and they kissed. Normally she would have backed away but something inside her, told her to take the opportunity. Their kisses turned into so much more, they couldn’t help themselves. Michelle lead AJ into her bedroom for a night of passionate lust.

Michelle and AJ woke to the sun coming in from her window. “No one must never know what happened last night.” AJ told Michelle firmly.
“Yeah.” Michelle replied sitting up in bed drawing her legs towards her, resting her head on them.
“This was my fault. While I feel bad for doing this, I loved it. I love being with you.” AJ said not knowing on how to say it.
“I know what you mean. I know.” Michelle sighed as she laid back on the bed facing the window, away from AJ.
“You’re the only one that would understand.” He whispered as he lay behind her as he kissed her shoulder.
“Don’t. Don’t say that.” Michelle replied as she turned around now facing AJ.
“I know it’s wrong. It’s less than 24 hours since Sally and Alexandra’s funeral and all. Especially Alexandra.” AJ stated before going quiet.
“AJ, I know towards the end, you fell out of love with Sally. It’s alright.” Michelle soothed holding AJ, tears streaming down from his face. Moments later, the door knocked.

“Shit, it’s Howie.” Michelle freaked out.
“Howie? You got stuff with him?” AJ asked.
“Oh god. Shit yeah. We were going to talk about the video shoot.” She remembered as she got out of bed, putting on a sweatshirt and pants.
“Fuck.” AJ commented.
“Grab a shower and all. Make it as though you were spending the night on my couch and you were in the shower. I remember the couch was left in a mess.” Michelle told him as she went out the room to go to the front door.

“You forget we had the meeting?” Howie asked as she opened the door.
“Yeah kinda.” Michelle replied.
“See AJ’s car is out there on the street. He here is he?” Howie commented.
“Yeah, he came here last night, talked til the early hours and suggested he spend the night here. He was too tired to drive.” Michelle replied.
“Yeah yesterday was tough.” Howie said as she sat next to him after making a coffee for all of them, AJ’s on the other bench that he would see when he came in from the bathroom. At the moment, AJ walked in.
“Hey D, sup.” AJ said as he walked in.
“Nothin much, just going over with Shell about the video clip doing in Vegas next week. How ya doin?” Howie asked as they hugged.
“Cool.” AJ replied as he took his coffee.
“D was saying that I’m gonna get to ride a Harley, wide open spaces, leather jacket the works.” Michelle told him.
“Oh man that’s cool. I’ll let you get back to it. I gotta go back to my place, get Sally’s things for her parents. Want them today. Stuff for Alexandra as well.” AJ said.
“You gonna be cool man doing it?” Howie asked concerned.
“Yeah I’ll be right. I want to do this. Anyway it has to be done. Sooner the better.” AJ replied as he grabbed his jacket off the sofa. Howie was confused especially on the tone AJ used. Michelle gave Howie the look as to not say anything.
“I’ll call ya later tonight alright. Thanks for last night.” AJ told Michelle as he pecked her on the cheek and waved bye to Howie.
“Yeah no worries, see ya.” Michelle replied.

“What’s going on...sooner the better?” Howie asked as AJ walked out the door.
“It’s not my place. I’m sure he will tell you in his own time.” Michelle replied as she sat next to Howie on the kitchen bench chairs with her laptop in front of her.
“He alright?” Howie asked.
“He will be. Anyway, so what’s going on?” Michelle replied changing subject.
“Ok. Well Kenny is going with you to Las Vegas next week. The video layout what we wanted is going ahead. Everything is all set. You will have 2 solid days of nothing but learning how to ride the Harley in Vegas then go out on the highway. There is a house in the middle of nowhere that is set to be demolished and we are actually going to be demolishing it with the explosion. After running from the house, flames behind you, you are going to get on the bike and ride off with the house burning in the background, on the same side of the road you are there’s going to be a rusty old sign there with Las Vegas on there. Then, as you enter Vegas, you are going to be jumping off the bike into the air, landing in a limo all glammed up riding down the main strip of Vegas. The limo will stop, a guy in a tux will open the door, you take his hand, will escort you in the door and then the next thing will happen will be going into the nightclub where these guys will be, girls around dancing. You go up to one of these guys and sing the chorus as the song ends. He will react and stuff.” Howie explained.
“Wow oh wow! This is gonna rock.” Michelle exclaimed.
“You like?” Howie asked.
“Yeah! For sure! It’s gonna rock.” She replied.
“Kenny’s gonna have to go with you. We got work here in LA.” Howie told her.
“That’s cool. With Kenny you never know what might happen.” Michelle laughed.
“I was thinking of Nick get on the Harley but it wouldn’t happen with our commitments.” Howie said.
“Hey it’s cool. Ya got your thing, I got my thing.” Michelle assured him.
“Kenny was thinking flying out Sunday night and start Monday afternoon.” He mentioned.
“Your the boss.” Michelle reminded him.
“And don’t you forget it.” Howie laughed as his phone rang.

After Howie left a few hours later, Michelle started to get things ready for the weekend and tidy up her place as it was in shambles and couldn’t find anything.

On her balcony having dinner Michelle had her iPod on listening to the single for the video next week, her phone rang. “Hey how are ya?” AJ asked.
“Yeah doing alright. How you going?” Michelle replied.
“Feel like shit to be honest. Just left Sally’s parents place.” AJ sighed.
“Come on over.” Michelle told AJ.

Ten minutes later AJ was in Michelle’s apartment telling her what happened. “Soon as I got out of my car, they met me, wanted the bags from my car and said goodbye, wished me luck for the future. They cut me off like that.” AJ explained.
“That is so wrong. I’m sorry.” Michelle replied taking hold of AJ’s hand.
“I’m thinking this was planned, get with some guy and get pregnant, me the father, the whole lot and the ditch me or something. I know the accident, was just that.” AJ stated.
“You honestly don’t think that do you?” Michelle asked.
“What do you want me else to think? Her parents were cold as ice to me. I’ve put up with shit people in the past but this was the worst. I did love her Shell. I did love Sally.” AJ replied.
“I know you did. I know.” Michelle whispered, putting her arms around him.
“You are the only one that knows what I feel. I’m so glad that you are here Shell.” AJ confessed.
“Don’t forget you have the guys as well. Your family.” Michelle reminded him.
“I don’t want them to know about all this. Please tell me you won’t mention anything.” He begged.

Sunday night Kenny and Michelle flew out to Las Vegas. A week in Las Vegas. The guys gave her $100 each to put some money on some games that Kenny was going to do. Michelle had no idea on how to play the games and Kenny was a good player.

Monday morning when they arrived in Las Vegas, sleep deprived from being in coach of screaming kids and also a football team end of season trip, Kenny and Michelle went straight to the training centre for her to do her training on the bike. While Michelle was going to be in training, Kenny was going to be organising things for the video shoot and finalising the cast for the film crew. Howie employed Kenny to be his assistant for when Howie couldn’t be there for Michelle for her career. Michelle had seen Kenny a few times at a few functions the guys had been to and they had connected so it seemed perfect for Howie to get Kenny to help out.

Michelle was having fun learning on the Harley and spending time in Vegas. For the rest of the week, Michelle worked so hard for the video, learning more about the video concept and also having input onto the video on how it would look. It had to be edited and cut before the video premiere in New York on the Sunday edition of Good Morning America. Time was running out for the finishing of the video with Michelle there and Kenny and Michelle had to allow the producer and director finish it off, Michelle and Kenny flying to New York City late Saturday afternoon.

Throughout the week, Michelle and AJ had kept in contact more, more than they thought and more than anyone else thought. Both made up people who they were on the phone to when people asked them. Kenny and Michelle were not letting anyone see the video at all until the premiered. Michelle wanted everyone to be surprised with the outcome. Not even Howie was allowed to see it. Everyone had to wait for it to premiere on the show.

Michelle hadn’t been to New York on her own before. Normally she was with the guys, either as friends or as a girlfriend to either Nick or AJ. It felt weird being just her and Kenny. Michelle had been to New York a couple of times with Brenda but it was just for a few hours. Michelle was going to be in New York for a couple of days doing TV show appearances. Howie was making sure that the world heard of Michelle. It was a quick promo tour in the USA before a week’s break and then to London, Berlin, Paris, Madrid, Rome, Stockholm, back to London before flying out to Australia for a couple of days promo. It was going to be a busy few weeks for Michelle but with touring around with the guys she was prepared for it.

Finishing at the Good Morning America studios, Michelle and Kenny did a tour of New York City. She wanted to see New York. They went everywhere they possibly could. Statue of Liberty, Ground Zero, Wall Street, FAO Schwarz, One Police Plaza, Manhattan Ferry, Broadway.

Sunday night when Kenny and Michelle were going through the plans of the TV shows for the next couple of days, Nick rang.

“Sorry to disturb ya but I’m here on my own in New York. I have to tell you something and I couldn’t do it over the phone and it can’t wait. Which hotel you at?” Nick asked.
“What’s going on?” Michelle replied worried.
“Where are you?” Nick asked again.
“We’re at the Gershwin Hotel at 7 E 27th Street, 2nd floor.” Michelle replied.

“What’s wrong?” Kenny asked when Michelle got off the phone.
“Nick’s here in New York. He has something to tell me and he couldn’t do it over the phone or wait til we got back to LA.” Michelle replied concerned.
“Why is it just Nick? Wonder what’s going on.” Kenny questioned.

Nick arrived half an hour later, backpack on his back. “New York traffic is bad. Getting a cab was so hard. Almost caught the subway.” Nick said as he came in Michelle’s hotel room, Kenny on the couch going over things on the computer for the week ahead.
“What is it? Why are you here?” Michelle asked.
“Good to see you too.” Nick laughed as they hugged.
“Sorry, it’s just that you got me worried and all. Everything alright back home?” Michelle asked.
“Yeah, yeah everything is fine. Ah Kenny, you mind if I talk to Michelle alone?” Nick said and then turned to Kenny.
“No worries.” Kenny replied and got up and left.

“What is it Nick? What is it so big that you had to come out here for?” Michelle asked.
“You better sit down.” Nick replied.
“Nick, your scaring me here.” Michelle told him as she sat on the sofa, Nick sitting down on the coffee table opposite her.
“I don’t know how to tell you this. I’ve been trying to work this out ever since I found out.” He said.
“Nick, you can tell me anything. You know me.” Michelle assured him.
“Last night I had a phone call from your parents. They are here in New York.” Nick simply told her. Michelle went silent.
“And what do they want?” Michelle asked.
“To see you.” Nick replied.
“No. No way. I don’t want to see them. No.” Michelle stammered, rocking herself back and forth.
“It’s alright. You don’t have to. I will tell them.” Nick promised her.
“Anyone know?” Michelle asked him.
“I said to Howie that a couple of days may need to be rescheduled. He was wondering but I said to him that this was something personal that I only know of and no one is to know. Not even AJ knows. I don’t even think he knows I am in New York.” Nick replied.
“Do you have any idea what they would want? Why wait all these years?” Michelle asked.
“I think it’s something you need to find out for yourself.” Nick said.
“You do know. Nick what is it?” Michelle pleaded.
“It’s not my place but here is their phone number. No one has to know what is going on. Not even Kenny. If you do talk to your parents and want to take things further, you let me know and I will take care of the rest.” Nick assured me, handing her the piece of paper with just her parents names and a phone number, New York number, more precise, Jamestown.

Michelle stared at the piece of paper for a while. The last time she had seen her parents was when she walked out of their house when Michelle was 15. Michelle had a troubled childhood, something only she confided into Nick about. Nick was the only one that knew of what happened. For a while Michelle looked up to Nick’s parents as guidance but that fell apart.

“I’ll call them.” Michelle said about an hour later, Nick sitting next to her, not saying anything, waiting patiently.
“Want me to go?” Nick asked.
“No, stay. Please.” Michelle replied as she grabbed her phone from her bed. Michelle fumbled with the phone several times, her fingers shaking trying to dial the numbers.
“You don’t have to. There’s no rush.” Nick reminded her.
“It’s ok, I can do this.” Michelle replied.

“Hello. It’s Sarah.” Michelle said when the phone answered and a middle aged man answered the phone. Michelle changed her name when she became of age.
“Sarah, it’s so good to hear your voice. How are you?” Her father answered.
“Doing good.” Michelle replied not knowing how to react.
“I take it you have gotten in contact with Nick.” Her father asked.
“Yes. Yes Nick contacted me.” She replied.
“I’m glad. It took a while but got there to get in contact with you.” Her Dad commented.
“Yeah...So, what do you want?” Michelle asked.
“Alright, well seeing as you are upfront with this. I just thought that you would like to know that your mother is not well.” Her father stated.
“Oh.” Michelle commented not knowing what to say.
“It’s not good. She’s dying.” Her father said.
“Oh I see.” Michelle replied.
“I know you probably don’t want to see her but I think your Mom might want to see you before it’s too late.” Her Dad said.
“I’ll think about it.” Was all she said and got off the phone.

“Well?” Nick asked when she got off the phone.
“They think after all these years that I can run back to them. What they did to me? Just the thought of them and I am sick or worse.” Michelle replied.
“She may want to say she is sorry. Make amends before she dies. She may want to make amends before she can rest in peace.” Nick said.
“She started everything Nick. She is the one that started that everything. I can’t forgive her. I can’t forgive anyone. I’m sorry but I can’t. I appreciate you coming out over and here and all but I simply cannot do it. That chapter has closed.” Michelle told him.
“Think about it overnight ok?” Nick suggested.
“Alright.” Michelle replied as she went to the kitchen chair her jacket was on and was putting it on.
“What you gonna do?” He asked.
“Gonna go for a walk.” Michelle replied.
“You ain’t going alone. Not safe at night.” Nick told her, he putting on his jacket.

Walking around Central Park for a few hours, Nick by her side, cups of coffee in their hands trying to keep warm on the cool night. Michelle had made a decision. “I have a conscience. If I don’t, I will regret it. I will see her. I will make her think its alright, but it certainly won’t be alright.” Michelle told Nick.
“Just tell me what to do.” Nick said.
“I will meet with her and then I would want to meet him after wards. This will be their one and only chance to see me.” Michelle replied.
“I’ll call Howie in the morning.” He told her.
“AJ’s not to know. If anyone that isn’t to know, it’s AJ. Promise me you won’t let AJ in on anything?” Michelle begged.
“No one will know. I’m the only one. If anyone asks we’ll say some top secret music stuff that only I know about. They’ll be fine.” Nick replied.
“Thankyou.” Michelle said.
“For what?” Nick asked as he put a hand on her arm to stop walking.
“Everything. I still remember the first day you saw me. You took me in and you didn’t even know me.” Michelle replied.
“One thing I don’t like is seeing someone beautiful as you being treated the way you were. If the guys and I didn’t have that free day in New York and I wanted to come to Jamestown, we wouldn’t have met. I try and get out to Jamestown whenever in New York and all. Bumping into you at the park...I couldn’t help but you know...” Nick told her.
“I know. You didn’t have to do that. I appreciate it. I will never be able to thankyou enough.” Michelle replied leaning up to peck Nick on the cheek.
“We’ll see.” Nick smirked, putting his arms around her to tickle her.

Nick had called Howie and got him to cancel all New York commitments for the next couple of days. The guys called me wondering what was going on, even Aaron but I was going along with the line as what Nick suggested, top secret stuff only we were to know about.

“Feel weird being back here?” Michelle asked Nick as he drove into Jamestown later that morning.
“Yeah but it’s all good. Remember, even if you get to the door, you can back out.” Nick replied reminding Michelle.
“I know. Thanks.” Michelle said, looking out the window seeing what had changed since she was there last.

Nick pulled up outside her parents place and turned the car off. “You can go and do a few things or whatever.” Michelle said to Nick.
“It’s cool. I might surprise a few fans and tweet and stuff.” Nick replied.
“You will make twitter crash. You know what it like when you get online.” Melissa laughed.
“Haha, yeah I know. You’ll be right?” Nick asked.
“Yup, fine.” She replied as she got out of the car.

Her father opened the door. “Sarah, it’s good to see you. Thank you for coming.” Her father said.
“Where is she?” Michelle asked. Her father lead her into her parents bedroom, bypassing her brothers and sisters who were in the lounge room not saying anything.
“Hello Sarah.” Her mother faintly spoke.
“Hi.” Michelle replied standing in the room not knowing what to do. The last time she was in her parents bedroom was when they abused her.
“Thank you for coming. Means a lot to me.” Her mother said.
“Well I’m here.” Michelle told her as she sat on a chair near the bedroom door.
“I take it you have heard that I am dying?” Her mother asked.
“That’s what I’ve been told. All I know.” Michelle replied.
“I haven’t got that long and I am trying to finish things off before it’s too late. I want to make peace with everyone before I go.” Her Mom told her.
“It’s in the past. I’ve moved on. It’s ok.” Michelle replied.
“Sarah, I want to apologise. We had no right to do that.” Her Mom apologised.
“My name is Michelle now.” Michelle added.
“Sorry. I really do mean my apology Michelle. I may have said it years ago but I didn’t really mean it. I do now and it’s not because I am dying. I have been truly and deeply sorry since the day you walked out. I failed as a mother/parent especially to you. I was never there for you. I hope that when you become a mother that you don’t do anything that I have done.” Michelle’s Mum said.
Michelle remained silent. She didn’t know what to say. Michelle had waited over 15 years for an apology for all the abuse her parents gave to her but she didn’t expect something like this.
“It’s alright. It really is.” Michelle replied now sitting on her parents bed, taking hold of her Mom’s hand.
“Thank you.” Her mom smiled, a couple of tears rolling down her face. Soon her Mom went to sleep to rest.

In the living room, her father, brother and sisters were there waiting for her to say something.
“This would mean so much to her.” Michelle’s Dad told her.
“I’m here aren’t I?” Michelle replied.
“Don’t you think you have taken this a bit too far?” David, her older brother asked.
“It’s alright David. It’s ok.” Her Dad replied.
“What now?” Michelle asked.
“You are welcome to stay here. Your Mom may sleep for a few hours now. She preserved her energy for you coming.” Her Dad replied. At that moment, Jessica, Michelle’s younger sister called her family from her parents room.

Just before lunchtime, Michelle walked out her parents house, the final time. Definitely the final time. “It’s over.” Michelle told Nick as she sat in her seat and put the seatbelt on.
“Over?” Nick asked.
“She died a few minutes ago.” Michelle replied, no tone in her voice. No emotion.
“Shell, I’m sorry.” Nick said.
“She apologised to me and went to sleep. I was out with the others when Jessica warned us.” Michelle told him.
“You want to stay on?” He asked.
“I just want to go back to New York.” Michelle replied.

When they got back to the hotel , Michelle turned on her phone. “You have 50 messages.” Michelle repeated to Nick in a robot machine tone.
“How many from AJ?” Nick laughed.
“How does 48 out of 50 sound?” Michelle replied as she continued to listen to AJ’s messages. The other two were from Howie and Brian.
“Sounds like AJ when he doesn’t know what’s going on.” Nick agreed.
“I think I better call him. Let him know I am alright at least.” Michelle said.
“Yeah.” Nick replied as he got on his phone and began making calls.

That night, Nick flew back to Los Angeles, Kenny and Michelle going over things, a big catch up. Things were going to change for Michelle. Many appearances now would be taped and would all be done on one day. Either in the studio or by phone interviews. They had to get back on schedule.

Back in Los Angeles for a week’s break before flying out to London, Michelle spent time with Leighanne and Leigh catching up on things from what she had missed out on, prepared for her trip to Europe, Asia and Australia and spent time with the guys.

A month had gone, Michelle had done her promo tours in Europe, Asia and Australia and she just arrived home in Los Angeles. Everyone welcoming her home. Brian, Leighanne, Baylee, Howie, Leigh, James, Nick, AJ. Soon as Michelle and Kenny walked through the customs doors, celebrations happened.

A party was held at Nick’s place for their arrival and for Michelle’s success.
“Ya back girl. Ya back!” Howie told me.
“Yeah, I am back.” Michelle laughed.
“I’m serious here. Since you left for London, I have kept this from you because I wanted to surprise you, I have had so many calls for you. People want you to tour with them. I have a call back list. The phone doesn’t stop ringing.” Howie exclaimed excited.
“Serious!” Michelle shrieked.
“He’s serious.” Leigh spoke.
“You wanna do it now?” Nick asked Howie.
“Do what?” Michelle asked.
“It’s in the hall.” Nick told Howie.
“What? What is going on?” Michelle asked her voice a bit louder.
“Just wait, just wait.” Brian laughed.

“Again, as you left for London, everyone was talking about you. They love the single, loving so far of what they have heard of the album. You have heard about the sales from Kenny has told you and all. You collected the awards you got when touring but here is one award you couldn’t get.” Howie said to Michelle standing next to her, holding a large size frame, facing him.
“All that excess baggage.” Michelle laughed.
“This is an award for power bullet on the Billboard top 50. As you left, you went straight from number 90 right up to number 2.” Howie continued turning the frame towards Michelle presenting it to her. Michelle was shocked.
“You did it!” Nick shrieked. Michelle laid the frame on the table nearby and everyone gave her a hug. AJ gave more than a hug.

“AJ? Michelle? Want to tell us something?” Leighanne asked shocked as Michelle and AJ finished kissing.
“We’re back together.” AJ replied, his arms around Michelle’s waist.
“Since when?” Brian asked.
“A while.” Michelle replied.
“Define a while?” Leigh asked as they all sat down around the table, James and Brian playing basketball.
“A while alright. All you need to know.” AJ said.
“What’s going on you two?” Howie asked.
“We are back together. We’ve kept things quiet for a while and that’s it.” AJ replied.
“Just how long have you been back together?” Brian asked.
“Quit it will you guys. We’re back and that’s all you need to know.” AJ snapped.
“This around the time of Sally?” Nick asked.
“Nick, don’t. Please.” Michelle begged.
“How long after Sally?” Nick asked again.
“Quit the hassling alright. No one knows the shit I went through and Michelle was there for me.” AJ outburst.
“What you mean?” Leigh asked. AJ and Michelle looked at each other, Michelle telling AJ he better.

“Sally cheated on me, I wasn’t the father of Alexandra.” AJ told them.
“But how? She was always with you when we were on tour?” Howie asked.
“The last scan, the Dr confirmed it was 6 months, not 5 months. Sally was 6 months pregnant and we didn’t have sex til we were on tour and that was the first time. I forgot where we were and shit.” AJ explained.
“You were going to go through with all this?” Nick asked.
“I loved her. I loved Sally. I always wanted a child and I was going to raise it as my own.” AJ explained.
“AJ, we know you want to be a father but seriously you would have done that?” Howie asked.
“I thought this was my only chance to be a father.” AJ replied.
“There’s still plenty of time left for you. AJ you are a fantastic guy.” Brian told him.
“It’s all long and complicated and I can’t be bothered going into it now. The main thing is that I am happy, Michelle is happy.” AJ said looking at Michelle who was next to Leighanne.
“As long as everything is alright. We love you AJ but we just want to make sure you are doing the right thing. You aren’t rushing into things.” Leighanne spoke up. Michelle shocked.
“Leigh.” Brian said giving Leighanne the look to shut up.
“We know this isn’t how we wanted it. We did believe that AJ and Sally were fine, nothing was wrong with them. Soul mates, but this wasn’t meant to be.” Michelle spoke quietly. At that moment, Baylee and James came running up to where everyone was, wanting a drink.

“You sure this is what you want? We all know AJ will do it again.” Nick said to Michelle that night when he called, Michelle unpacking her suitcases and starting on the washing.
“I am sure. We have had long talks about this. AJ knows what he has done. He’s had a wake up call. We are totally committed to this. He knows that any kind of slip up, it’s over. No more.” Michelle replied.
“Shell...” Nick moaned, knowing what was going to happened.
“Nick, trust me on this. I didn’t think lightly about all this. My heart was saying to grab him but I listened to my mind and thought long and hard about this. Please.” Michelle begged.

“Welcome home.” AJ said putting his arms around Michelle when she finished setting up her things in their bedroom. A month on and Michelle moved back in with AJ.
“It’s good to be home.” Michelle smiled back at him.
“I was thinking...how about we go shopping for a new bed? Start a whole fresh. What about the whole house? A whole new house and new beginning?” AJ suggested.
“You what?” Michelle laughed.
“I’m serious. I wanna be more closer to Los Angeles.” He replied.
“I would have gone for a new bed but if you want a new pad its alright.” Michelle told him.
“If you wanna do the bed, that’s fine. I just wanna make you happy.” AJ said.
“I am happy.” Michelle assured him before luring him to the bed.

Two nights later, the guys were doing a show at the Staples Centre, Michelle going along with the guys. Leighanne was out of town with Baylee for work and Leigh was home with James who was sick with a cold. It was a benefit concert for bushfire victims the past summer. One of the crew’s family perished in the fire and the guys decided to do their own show. The fans were going to choose most of the songs with the guys performing some of their favourites.

Michelle was amongst the fans in the front row, having fun with all the fans, squealing away. Doing whatever they could to get the guys attention. Michelle was going to be performing as well with the guys a couple of songs plus one of her songs she was premiering dedicated to Barry who lost his life.

“Alright peoples...what we are going to do. We are going to head back for a bit and we are all going to do solos. Nicky here wants to go first. You think Nicky deserves to go first?” Brian said to the crowd. Squeals galore.
“Quit it with the Nicky stuff Rok...I’ll get you!” Nick laughed back at Brian as he and the guys walked off stage.
“Ok, ok. The Nickster is in control. Hahaha” Nick said in a evil laugh, the crowd going wild.
“So this is what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna do a couple of songs and then someone will come out. I don’t know who.” He continued. Michelle wasn’t there for the rehearsals but she was going to be joining in, knowing what parts to come in as arranged.
“This first one has been in my head for a few weeks now and I just gotta blast it out.” He continued as the music started.

“I can see the children crying....” Nick began to sing. Everyone squealed as Nick began to sing More Than That. Michelle was not impressed. What was worse, during Nick’s actual solo Nick leant down and serenaded Michelle. No one had known that Michelle and AJ were back together. It was only between everyone inside that needed to know. Michelle gave Nick a glare but trying to be shocked that he was singing to her.

Michelle did have that in her head but she didn’t want to admit it to anyone. She did believe Nick in the song that he would be the one for her but her heart belonged with AJ. Deep inside Nick did too.

“What on earth was that?” Michelle hissed at Nick when she went backstage, getting all prepped for her going on stage, Nick standing next to her connecting himself up to the cables for him to go back on stage.
“As the song said.” Were the only words Nick replied and walked off to the other side of the stage where he would be walking out from. When Michelle joined the guys on stage, she sang Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely, Never Gone, I’ll Be Missing You by Puff Daddy, Faith Evans, etc and then sang her song for Barry, I’ll See You Soon.

There was tension between AJ and Nick which Brian and Howie picked up on and moved themselves around the stage so no one would notice. The moment they were off stage after the show, Nick and AJ started to have words and had to be separated.

“I’m not that stupid Shell. I knew that when Nick sang More Than That it was aimed at you to go back to him.” AJ said as they were preparing dinner.
“I’m just as mad as Nick as you are. He knows it too.” Michelle spoke.
“What more can we do to prove to him that we are serious? To everyone?” AJ asked.
“I don’t know. I don’t know.” Michelle sighed as she went from the fridge to the cook top where AJ was stirring the meat.
“It will be alright.” AJ replied as he pecked her on the cheek. At that moment, the doorbell ringing.
“I’ll get it.” Michelle said as she went to the door. Before getting into the hallway she saw on who it was. “It’s Nick.” She added.
“Shit.” AJ replied.

“What are you doing here?” Michelle asked when he came inside.
“We’re sorting this out now.” Nick told her straight out, AJ joining them in the hallway.
“Nick she’s with me now. We’re committed to each other.” He told Nick.
“AJ I love you like a brother but when it comes to relationships, your hopeless. You always end up breaking peoples hearts. You’ve done that way too many times with Shell. Shell loves you so much but she isn’t happy.” Nick blurted.
“Excuse me. Nick I am happy. What makes you think you know me and all too well?” Michelle retorted.
“Shell, who do you come to when AJ has fucked up? Me? Michelle I love you too much to see you hurt again by AJ. You are an amazing woman. A survivor. AJ can say all these things and all but he will do it over and over and over again. If you were with me....” Nick said to her face.
“Nick, no. I said to you when I got back, this is for keeps. AJ and I are happy. We have never been more sure of anything. When he said to me he swore everything he did in the past would never happen again, he meant it. I believe him. You are my best friend, but I’m afraid if you can’t accept me with AJ then I’m sorry I don’t see much in our friendship.” Michelle told him firmly, in shock of what she has said.

“Michelle please.” Nick begged.
“I think you were told. Now if you wouldn’t mind, you can go. Get the fuck outta here.” AJ shouted, putting his arms around Michelle to protect her.
“He is lying to you Michelle.” Nick tried again.
“Please leave.” Michelle replied.
“You heard her.” AJ told Nick. Nick didn’t like that, refusing to leave. AJ let go of Michelle, she backing away as AJ opened the front door for Nick.
“I ain’t leaving. Not leaving until Michelle comes to her senses.” Nick yelled for Michelle to hear. AJ had enough. He started to shove Nick out the door but soon they began to hit each other. Violently.

Ten minutes later, police cars turned up, arresting both Nick and AJ, going in separate cars.

By morning, Nick and AJ were released from the police station, Michelle not wanting to press charges. Aaron came and got Nick while Michelle was waiting for AJ. Michelle wanted to be with AJ for the rest of her life. She wanted to have his children. Her life was with AJ.

Nick walked out first, Aaron getting out of the car to show he was there. Nick gave Michelle a glare and then bowed his head, hands in his pocket. Aaron didn’t blame Michelle for what happened.

“It’s you I belong with.” Michelle whispered in AJ’s ear when he met her, Nick and Aaron long gone.
“Me too.” He whispered back in her ear holding her. “And I will love you more than that.” He added, holding her tight.