Kimberly had woken up the next day from the sun beating down on her face from a crease in the blue curtains hanging from the large window across the room. She had to blink her eyes a few times to get used to the hard glare that was blazing down at her. As she shifted her body, she realized she was being restrained. That was when she saw Nick’s arm was securely wrapped around her waist as his nude body was pressed against hers. Suddenly she felt her lips stretch out into a wide smile as she remembered the night before; the passion, the heat. To her surprise her throat wasn’t even sore. She slowly turned so that she was facing the man asleep next to her. She felt her heart flutter; he looked so peaceful, so beautiful. It should be against the law for a man to be so perfect. His face was smashed against the pillow and his tiny spikes had died over night and were now flopped over; some even covering his closed lids. She carefully brushed them aside and with the back of her hand she caressed his face. She was so in love with him, she couldn’t get over how happy he made her. His lips were parted an inch and she could hear him softly breathing. It just made no sense….how could someone like him love a woman like her? Did he really mean it? Or did he lie just to get her in bed? No, that couldn’t be it, because they were already in bed before she even told him. She snuggled close to his warm body. His breathing patterns slowly changing as he inhaled deeply, causing a small snore to escape him.
She sat up slowly, trying her best not to wake him and she put her lips to his ear softly whispering, “I love you.” She heard him let out a small groan, she smiled seeing he was still sleeping. She bit on her lower lip before leaning in and gently pressing her lips onto his, when she pulled away she half smiled. She then slowly turned her body and as carefully and gently as she could, she unwrapped his arm from around her so she could get up. Once she was freed, she scooted to the edge of the bed and planted her bare feet on the chilly wood floor. Before she could even stand, she felt arms cage her once more and she turned over and saw Nick had woken up.
“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked playfully in his sleepy voice, as he rested his chin on her shoulder.
She softly giggled as she turned to him, causing her hair to fall upon her face. She brushed it aside, “I’m sorry, did I wake you?”
He smiled sleepily, “Its okay. Why don’t you come back to bed with me?” He glanced at the wooden clock on the wall, “It’s only nine in the morning, Baby Angel. Never thought of you as a morning person.”
She shrugged, “Once I’m up, I’m up. How don’t you go back to bed? I’ll be quiet, I’ll join you again when I’m all nice and clean.”
He smirked at the image of her crawling in bed with him, all cleansed and dripping wet, “Okay, you talked me into it.”
She gave a small chuckle, “Doesn’t take much, does it?”
“Nope,” he answered with a cheesy grin. He planted a sweet kiss on her shoulder before collapsing back down on his back, “Don’t have too much fun in there without me.”
“I’ll do my very best.” She then crawled over towards him and pressed her lips onto his, “I love you.”
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her down on him as his tongue slipped inside her mouth, “Mmm, love you too, Baby Angel.”
“I don’t think I could ever get tired of hearing you say that to me.”
He opened his eyes and smiled, “Good, because you’re going to be hearing it a lot.”
Kimberly felt a rush of butterflies swarm inside her stomach and she gave him one last peck before sitting straight up. “Go back to bed,” she kindly ordered, as she stood up and walked into the bathroom that was connected with the bedroom.
Nick grinned seeing her naked back. He closed his eyes and felt the smile stretch around his lips. He felt himself slowly falling into a slumber thinking about the amazing woman in the next room. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep, but it also didn’t last. He felt a pillow being thrown to his head. He groaned, “Mmm, Baby Angel. Give me a few more minutes. You wore me out last night,” he grumbled, throwing his face into the pillow.
“Get the fuck up now!” Ordered AJ’s rigid voice.
His blue eyes shot open and he immediately sat up, seeing four of his band mates. The stares they were giving him were sharp enough to cut through glass. He knew he fucked up big time by missing out on the photo shoot, but this time it was by mistake. He knew how much shit he was going to be in, but he was praying they wouldn’t confront him until after Kimberly was gone. She was still in the shower, he could hear it running and he was sure the others could as well. Nick’s eyes narrowed as he stared at the four-some, “What the fuck?!? Don’t you know how to knock?” He demanded in a rough tone.
Kevin inhaled deeply as his green eyes glared at him, “Don’t you get smart with us,” he growled.
“What the hell are you doing in here?” He demanded to know, but he already knew the answer. He wished they would just leave, maybe he could get dressed and talk to them elsewhere. He didn’t want Kimberly to see this…he couldn’t let her see this.
“I think the question is what the fuck is that whore doing here?” Barked AJ.
Nick’s eyes turned a dark blue as he stared at his former tattooed friend, “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he hissed through his teeth.
“Oh really?” He looked around and grabbed a black bra that was on the floor, “Hmm, didn’t know you owed a pair of these.”
Nick insistently grabbed the bra from him, “Fuck off! Fine, what’s it to you anyway?!?”
“Did you forget to do something yesterday?” Asked Howie, in a hostile tone, as he folded his arms tightly across his chest.
He knew this was going to be coming, he knew he fucked up and yeah he had to pay the price. But he would give anything if they could just take this somewhere else. He let out a loud sigh, “Look, I’m really sorry. I totally forgot about the photo shoot. I know sorry doesn’t cut it, but – ”
“You’re damn right it doesn’t cut it!” Yelled AJ, “So fucking this whore is more important than your career, is that it?!?”
“You better watch how you talk about her,” he hissed.
“Nick, what’s happening to you?” Asked Brian in almost a pleading voice, “You can’t let a girl come in between your job.”
“She’s not coming in between anything!”
Kevin folded his arms, “Oh no? About the photo shoot last month? You left to go see her. You’re throwing your whole life away for a single girl you barely even know! Does she pride you in neglecting your responsibilities?”
“She knows nothing of my responsibilities. I don’t tell her about my job, she only cares about me; the person. Not the fucking Backstreet Boy.”
AJ coughed out a laugh, “Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Nick. So when you told her the reason you didn’t go to the shoot before, was she leaping for joy you flaked on us?”
He dropped his head, “I told her it was canceled.” Nick then glowered at him with his dark eyes, “I don’t want her knowing anything about my job and you guys. Trying to brainwash me because she’s not some fucking model.”
AJ snickered, “Please. Don’t go protecting her skanky ass.”
“I swear to God AJ, if you don’t cool it with the name calling there is going to be a serious problem.”
He rolled his brown eyes, “Ooh, I’m so scared.”
Brian looked at him dumbfounded, “Nick, this has nothing to do with the way she looks.”
“Yeah okay,” he said, rolling his blue eyes in annoyance.
“Ever since you met this girl you don’t care about anyone but yourself!” Howie’s voice sounded betrayed, “I can’t believe you, Nick. I really can’t. So now because of your forgetfulness,” he said, as he quoted his fingers. “We can’t be on the cover of Rolling Stones. So yeah, thanks a lot!”
“I don’t know how many times I can fucking say I’m sorry!”
“Sorry won't cut it this time, Nick,” answered Kevin, in a hard voice.
The shower then stopped and Nick dropped his head. Fuck, what was he going to do? “Can you just leave now, please?” He pleaded.
“Throw these on,” ordered Brian, as he threw him a pair of boxers that were on the floor.
“I think I’d like to meet this girl,” said AJ with a smug look. “Let her know how much of a whore she is.”
Nick quickly put on the boxers, “You’re not going to says ANYTHING to her! Or I swear to God, you're going to need a feeding tube!” He then looked at Kevin with hard eyes, “It’s bad enough that she already knows you don’t like you, don’t go making her feel any worse by telling her I lied.”
“You told her we don’t like her?” Howie said appalled.
“What? No, of course not!” He replied, in an angry tone, as he put on some of the jeans that were on the floor, “She overheard a conversation I had with Kevin.”
“I’ll say whatever the fuck I want to say,” hissed AJ.
“Don’t,” mumbled Brian.
The bathroom door then opened and Kimberly stepped out, wearing nothing more than just a white towel. Not realizing the guys were there, she jumped when she saw them, “Um…h-hi,” she managed to say. Feeling completely uncomfortable only in a towel, she felt AJ’s hard eyes staring at her, making her feel even more discomfited; she swallowed hard.
“Hi,” replied Brian, looking to the floor, making no eye contact with her at all.
“Um, if I’ve known you were out here I wouldn’t have worn just a towel….so I’m – I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about, Baby Angel,” reassured Nick. “I didn’t know they were just going to show up like this.”
It was nearly impossible for him to hide the resentment in his voice and she caught onto that perfectly. She just nodded, “Well…I’m – I’m gonna go change,” she quickly added, as she grabbed the clothes off of the floor before retreating back into the bathroom.
Nick turned to the men in the room with a hard glower, “You guys are fucking assholes. I hope you know that!”
“The bitch looks ten,” said AJ. “What did you do, take her virginity away? I bet you’re the first guy she’s ever fucked.” He then snickered, “Poor girl.”
“Fuck you!” He yelled, not meaning to be so loud, “She’s twenty-three, so just get off it. You upset that I actually got some and don’t have to worry about catching some STD?” He questioned, raising an eyebrow, “How many times did you have to test yourself because you fuck random hoes? At least with this one I know I can trust.”
“Yeah, because the only time she gets any is with you! You pretty much raped the girl.”
Nick could feel his blood starting to boil, “I’m this close to fucking killing you!”
“Nick. AJ,” Kevin’s hard voice filled their ears. “Cool it.” He then stared at Nick in disgust, “What’s the matter with you? So spending one night with this girl is more important than your job, Nick?”
“I fucked up! I get that. But she had nothing to do with that! So stop fucking pin pointing this on her, will ya?!?”
“Well, can you blame us?” Asked Howie, “I mean, it seems like it all started when you met her.”
Nick looked at him shocked; he expected that from AJ or Kevin, but not from Howie. Howie was always the one that tried to fix the mess he made. He and Brian were the ones he always counted on, but now it seemed like the only one he could count on was himself. “How could you even say that?”
He shrugged, “I hate to say it, but it’s true. Come on, are you saying she’s not at all part of you slacking off?”
“No, she’s not! And because I missed one fucking photo shoot does not put me in the category of slacking off.”
AJ coughed out a laugh, “One, Nick? I can think of more than just fucking one!”
“The other time I bailed was because you were fucking – ” Nick stopped himself when he heard the bathroom door open and Kimberly walked out wearing the black dress she wrote the night before. He looked at her and forced a smile, “That was fast.”
She shrugged. The tension in the air was thick enough where you could cut it with a knife. Whatever was going on with the guys it was bad, she wished so badly that he would open up to her and tell her what the issue was. He was putting on an act with her when the guys were around and she could see it perfectly. She cleared her throat, “So um if you don’t remember me, I’m Kim,” she said, with a small smile. She wanted to do everything she could to ease the atmosphere.
“Yes, we know,” AJ said in a cool voice.
Nick’s eyes darted at him like two razors; almost like he was about to attack. Kimberly saw that his fists were balled up in two tight balls, so she grabbed onto his arm and soothingly rubbed it with the tips of her fingers, “Are you okay?” She whispered.
He nodded, “Yeah, I’m fine, baby,” he insisted, as he leaned down and softly kissed her on the lips.
AJ rolled his eyes and Kimberly saw that, not understanding why he had such a dislike towards her. She remembered that time when Nick was on the phone and he mentioned AJ – so what did she do that was so wrong for him to have such a hatred towards her? He didn’t even know her! “I-I guess that was inappropriate, I’m sorry.” Nick looked at him disgusted, she tried to ignore the evil death stares he was giving to the tattooed man across from her, “So you said you knew me….is it that you remember me from the mall I went a few weeks ago with my friend, Laura?”
“Let’s just say you’re name is mentioned a lot,” he replied and he shot at Nick. He inhaled deeply, doing all he could to contain himself from blowing up.
“Oh…” Kimberly looked at him confused, “Nick…Nick talks about me?” She asked, as she looked up at her boyfriend, whom was fuming.
“No, just everyone else,” he mumbled under his breath.
“Stop,” ordered Kevin in a low voice.
Kimberly’s eyes shot back at AJ, “Ex-excuse me?!?” Her voice trembled as she felt herself getting worked up.
Nick’s eyes were so dark they nearly looked back as he stared at him. He then quickly looked back at his girlfriend and rubbed her back, kissing her on the temple, “Baby Angel, do you think you could get some something to drink in the frig? I think I have a few beers in there.”
She looked at him perplexed, “Beer? Now? Nick, it’s only like ten in the morning.”
He half smiled, “Yeah. I could really use one. Please?”
She smiled and nodded, “Sure.”
“No,” said Kevin in a hard voice and she stopped in her tracks. “Don’t get him one.”
She felt a little offended and she stared at him sharply, “I think Nick is old enough to decide what he would like to drink.” She knew it probably wasn’t a smart idea to snap at him like that, but he already hated her, so what difference did it make?
“What Kevin means is,” said Brian in a kind voice. “We would really like to talk to Nick alone. So, so maybe you could possibly just step outside for a few minutes?”
He was very kind and trying everything not to upset her. He was probably the only one out of the band that didn’t hate her. She nodded, “Okay. Yeah. I’ll – I’ll be in the lobby if you need me,” she softly said, as she slowly made her way towards the door.
Nick tightly grabbed her hand, “NO!” He said in a hard voice, “She’s my guest – she stays. You guys leave. You’re the ones that just barged in here, not her.”
Kimberly could see the resent he had in his eyes as he stared at the other guys and it made her feel almost frightened. She looked up at him, “It’s fine, Nick. I don’t mind. You guys obviously need to talk about stuff.”
He stared at her and wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her, smiling when he pulled apart, “I want you to stay, Baby Angel. These losers can leave. We’re finished here anyway.”
“Losers?” Repeated AJ in a vile tone.
The tension was becoming so overwhelming she thought maybe it was going to smother everyone that was caught in it; including her. She shook her head at Nick, “Baby, it’s fine I’ll just be right out – ”
“NO!” He shouted, “YOU’RE NOT LEAVING!!!”
Kimberly could feel her eyes tear up and she aggressively shoved him away, “Want a bet?” She choked out before shoving past him.
He vigorously ran a hand through his tangled hair from the jell the night before, “Kim, I’m sorry!”
“I’ll be out in the lobby. Get me when you’re finished!” She said in a hard voice, trying to keep her tone steady. She then slammed the door behind her, pressing her back against it feeling a few tears slowly rolling down her face as she inhaled deeply. She couldn’t believe that he screamed her….him out of all people. She wiped the tears away and was about to walk towards the elevator and head towards the lobby until she stopped in her tracks. She chewed on her lower lip and as much as she knew this was a bad idea she decided to stay. She walked towards the door and as quietly as possible she opened it a crack. The other guys were in the bedroom and that door was wide open so she could hear them perfectly. She knew that Nick was not going to open up to her and tell her the real reason why he was so upset….this was the only way she’d find out the truth…
“FUCK!” Shouted Nick. He then eyed the four men in the room, “SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!”
“We didn’t make you do anything, Nick,” spat Howie.
Nick glowered at him, was about to remark until AJ’s annoying voice filled his ears, “Well, that’s just great!”
“What are you talking about?” He demanded in a low voice, trying to do all he could to suppress his anger.
“Now she’s gonna go crying to all her friends saying what an asshole Nick Carter is! Brace yourself kid, because you’re gonna be all over the tabloids. It’s gonna be worse than when everyone thought you beat Paris Hilton!”
“AJ!” Hissed Brian.
“Hey, it’s the truth!”
Nick could feel himself losing control as he felt heat burn from his face, “FUCK YOU!” He barked, “Kim isn’t fucking like that! If she was I think people would know I was dating her! But you wouldn’t know that, would you? Because you won’t even give her a fucking chance! She’s the best girl I’ve ever been with – she doesn’t fuck me over and I know she’s faithful so why don’t you – ”
He snickered, “Well, of course she’s gonna be faithful. Just look at her! No one would wanna touch her with a ten foot pole. And you actually fucked her? God Damn, man did you have a bag over her head or something?!?”
“YOU FUCKING DICK!” Nick charged at him and slammed him into the wall, “If she’s so God damn disgusting, why the fuck were you staring at her while she was just in that towel?!?” AJ’s face turned hard, “Oh yeah, I saw that! So what’s the real reason you don’t like her?!?”
“Nick!” Ordered Kevin, “Let him go.”
Nick glared at AJ as he released him, “So tell me, AJ. What the fuck do you have against my girlfriend?”
“You already know! She stops you from your responsibilities. Because of you….no because of HER you blew our only chance to be on the cover of Rolling Stones!”
“How many times do I fucking have to tell you?!? I lied to her! I told her it was canceled! So get the fuck over it already!”
Kimberly threw her hand over her mouth as she heard him…he lied? Why the hell would he lie to her about something like that?!? It was no wonder why the other guys didn’t like her….they thought she was holding him back. She felt angry tears roll down her cheeks. How could he even do something like that?
“Bullshit!” Snarled AJ, “So tell me Nick, what are you going to do next week when we have to go to Canada?” He demanded, “Are you just gonna ditch and stay with your little whore? Or actually do your job for once?”
Nick’s eyes tightened, “At this point I say fuck Canada.”
“What?!?” Screeched Howie, “What….what are you saying, Nick?”
“Nick!” Spoke Kevin in a stern voice, “Don’t be stupid. This girl is not worth your career.”
“This girl? This girl is the best thing that’s ever happened to me!”
“YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HER!” He shouted, “So don’t go throwing it away for a piece of ass!”
“A piece of ass?!? She is more than just a fucking piece of – you know what? Fuck this, I QUIT! Have fun in Canada without me!”
“WHAT?!?” Screamed Brian, “Nick, don’t do this….PLEASE!”
“I’ve been unhappy for a long time now, and finally when I met someone that changes that you try to ruin it for me! I’m better off going solo – there’s no point in being in a band if you hate the members.”
“Nick, I’m begging you,” cried Howie. “Rethink this….don’t let a stupid girl ruin your life.”
“I happen to be in love with that stupid girl you’re referring to! So I would watch myself if I were you.”
“So that’s what this is about?!?” Screeched AJ, “Because you think you love her?!? She’s fucking brainwashing you, man! How can you not see it?!?”
“No, I know I love her, so fuck off. I’m done….I’m done with everything. I’m done with you, I’m done with Backstreet!”
“Well since Nick decided to quit I might as well too!” Started AJ, “Peace out, boys. Backstreet Boys is officially over!”
Kimberly felt so sick; she thought she was going to throw up. She nearly fell down onto her knees. Tears were rushing down her face like tiny little rivers, she threw her hands over her face as she slightly sobbed, she was the reason why the Backstreet Boys broke up. How could Nick have kept something like this from her? She knew they were having problems, but never to this extent! Why didn’t he go to her? He told her he loved her last night…how could he if he did this? Lied…..made her out like she was this horrible person. She saw AJ storm out of the bedroom and she took off, ran to the elevator, but it was taking too long for the doors to open so she booked it down the hall and opened the door to the staircase. Running as fast as she could down the stairs, after running down a few flights she could barely breathe so that was when she decided to use the elevator. Although she wished she just kept on running, because she found AJ standing there. She almost ran the other way, but she had to be brave. She walked inside and dropped her head; she didn’t want him to see the tears in her eyes.
The elevator seemed to be moving way too slow and the uncomfortable silence was eating at her. She wanted to say something, but what could she say? Before she could even scramble the right words, his hard voice filled the small room. “Weren’t you supposed to be waiting in the lobby?” He made no effort on hiding the resentment he had for her in his voice.
She was almost afraid to look at him. She looked up at him and saw his brown eyes were tight, staring her down like she was some animal he needed to put down. She licked her dry lips, “I-I got bored so I decided to look around…I didn’t know how much longer he was going to be. It seemed like you guys had a lot to talk about…” she trailed off, not knowing what else to say without giving away that she was eve’s dropping.
“We sure did,” he growled.
Kimberly dropped her head back down and felt a tear drop drip down her nose. She sniffled and glanced up at him, seeing him glaring at her. She understood why he hated her, she hated that Nick lied to her, she hated that he made her out like she was the bad one. Like she was trying to ruin their friendship, “I’m – I’m so sorry, AJ,” she said above a whisper.
He was still glaring at her, “Sorry?” He then let out a laugh, “And what exactly are you sorry for? For breaking up the band? Or for fucking with Nick’s head?” He shook his head, “I don’t know what he sees in you, but you are not worth this…you’re not worth anything!”
She felt fresh tears leak from her eyes and she nodded, “I know,” she choked. She then shook my head, “And I wish I knew what he saw me in….I wish I knew a lot.”
AJ shook his head in disapproval, “Who would have thought it would take a fucking slut to break up the band?” The doors then opened and he stormed out, not glancing back at her once.
Kimberly tightly closed her eyes and tried doing all she could to hold back the tears, but it was no use and they flooded down her face like a broken dam. Sobs escaped her, she couldn’t believe this was happening. What has she done? The elevator doors were starting to close and she quickly put her hand on the closing door. Thankfully it was sensored and the doors opened back up allowing her to escape. She quickly walked into the bathroom that was only around the corner and looked into the mirror, seeing how blood shot her eyes looked from all the tears. She splashed her face with water, she just wished this was all a bad dream. How could Nick quit the Backstreet Boys….FOR HER?!? AJ was right, she wasn’t worth anything, she was worth nothing. Why was Nick ruining his life? Why didn’t he tell her? Was it because he knew she would be against it? Was it because he knew she would leave him to save his career? She felt more tears pour from her eyes as she thought about it and put a hand up to her face and wept.
After nearly five minutes she finally settled down and dried her eyes with a paper towel. She took a deep breath and walked out of the ladies’ room and into the lobby and that was where she found him. Nick was on one of the red velvet couches, leaning back, his elbow on the armrest and his thumb and two fingers over his eyes. She swallowed the lump that formed in her throat slowly walked over towards him, “Ni-Nick?”
He pulled his hand away and when he did that, Kimberly saw a few tears rolling down his face, but he quickly wiped it away and sat up. She felt her lips trembled as she fought to not break down all over again. She was the cause of all this, she was the cause for his pain. “Ready?” He asked in a bleak tone. She just nodded, “Okay, then let’s go,” he mumbled as he stood up. He walked silently as they left the building, her head was down; a million thoughts were rushing through her mind. She needed to tell him that she knew, but how? She was pulled out of her train of thought when Nick faintly said, “I’m sorry for yelling at you back there. I didn’t mean it.”
She glanced at him and nodded, “I know,” she whispered before looking back to the floor. He said nothing more after that, they both silently walked to his car and got inside without a word. He started it and just took off, she could feel the strain grow more and more, she looked at him again, seeing his eyes were glued to the road and both hands were to the wheel. He rarely ever drove with using both hands; his right hand was usually holding hers. “Where, where are you taking me?” She finally asked as they sped down the road.
“Taking you home,” he answered in a gruff voice.
This was the first time she had ever been afraid to talk to him, but she had to force herself to do it. “What’s wrong?” She asked in a quiet tone.
“Nothing.”
Why was he lying? Didn’t he love her? If he loved her wouldn’t he want her to know? She should be the first person he went to for support. Didn’t he want her support? “Please don’t lie to me….and tell me the truth…” she paused, “For once.”
Nick glared at her with sharp eyes, “For once?!?” He snapped, “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?” Kimberly felt her breathing increase, “I’ve been nothing but honest with you! So what the fuck are you talking about?!?”
She could feel her body trembling from his angry words. Why was he being so mean? She understood the band broke up, but that was because he had been lying to her from the start. How the Hell could he even choose her over the band? “That photo shoot was never canceled….you lied to me, Nick. How could you do something like that?”
“So you’re spying on me now?”
“How else was I supposed to find out the truth? The real truth, Nick! You made me feel everything was happy and dandy between you and the other guys and all this time they thought so little of me because you made them think I was holding you back from your responsibilities. How could you even do that?!?”
“There’s a lot more than that. You don’t even know the half of it….no one does. They don’t understand what I go through.”
“Then tell me!” She pleaded, “Why won’t you? If you love me like you said you do then why can’t you just – ”
“Don’t go using that guilt trip on me, Kim!”
“Why won’t you tell me, Nick?!?”
“BECAUSE IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!”
That was like a slap in the face, and she felt the tears rolling down her face. She dropped her head, “Just take me home,” she choked through her sobs.
“That was the idea.”
She was doing all she could to contain them; she knew he knew that she was crying, but he didn’t even care. What happened to the guy she was with last night? Why was he being such a dick? Nick didn’t love her, how could he have? Look at the way he was talking to her. He used her, he just wanted to fuck her and he did…now that he got what he wanted he was just going to throw her aside. Just like everyone else had.
The rest of the car ride was silent, except for the occasional sniffles from Kimberly. Nick would often glance at her, wanting to reach out to touch her, but he gripped the stirring wheel even tighter. Soon they pulled up into her driveway, neither one of them made any attempt to move. Nick was just staring at his hands, and he let out a loud sigh, kicking himself for being such an ass. What was the matter with him?
Kimberly turned to him after about a minute of silence and said in a broken voice, “Well, thanks for a great night.” This was how it going to end, no kiss goodbye, no I love you…nothing. It was over and she could feel it.
He sighed, “Kim…” She slammed the door before she could hear his sorry excuse of an explanation and hurried to her apartment, but he jumped out of the car and grabbed her arm, “I’m sorry.”
She yanked her arm free, “Sorry?!? You’re sorry? Well, I’m sorry too, Nick! I’m sorry for ever going into that stupid mall and meeting you.”
His face fell, “What? How could you even say that, Kim?”
“Look what I’ve caused!!!” She yelled through her cries, “I broke you guys up….because you were stupid enough to pick ME; a stupid girl over men that are supposed to be your best friends!”
“You don’t get it; things have been bad long before I even met you. It’s called putting on an act! I do it for the fans.”
“And me apparently.”
He groaned, “Come on, don’t say that. I did it for your own good.”
“You made them think I was some conniving bitch! You made them hate me because of your stupid lies. I don’t think you’d ever understand how much that hurts, Nick.”
“Who gives a fuck what they think?!?”
“I do!” She yelled.
His blue eyes got tight, “Oh….I see.”
She looked at him puzzled, “And what exactly do you see?”
He let out a loud laugh, “Maybe they really were right about you. You are just a fan.”
Her breathing increased, “What? I’m just a fan? That’s all I am to you?”
“You sure had me fooled! Making me think you only cared about me….it’s never that simple with me…never has. What was I thinking? You just want the title like everyone else. I can’t believe you….wow, I thought you were really different.”
Kimberly looked at him appalled, “How could you even say that to me?!?” She demanded as she felt a fresh load of tears stream down her face, “If you truly loved me you would know….” She then paused, “But maybe it was me that was fooled, Nick. You making me think you really loved me.” She shook her head in dismay, “You’re just like the others, after you fuck me, you ditch me. Is that how it goes?”
“OH DON’T YOU EVEN FUCKING START WITH THAT!”
“It’s true isn’t it?!?” She aggressively ran her hands through her tangled hair, “I really thought I found something….but really what would a guy like you want with a girl like me?” She wept, “Just like AJ said, I’m not worth anything….so goodbye, Nick. I hope you find whatever you’re looking for because we know it’s not me.”
“He said that to you?” That time it sounded like he almost cared.
She turned her back and rushed up the stone steps of her apartment and before she opened the door she said, “Please just leave now. I think you’ve caused enough damage…don’t you think?”
“Kim, don’t.”
She couldn’t take this anymore, she couldn’t. She was sick and tired of being used. She ran inside the door and slammed it behind her; pressing her back against it and slowly slid down. She pressed her face into her knees and cried her heart out. What just happened….did her and Nick just break up? She knew it was too good to be true…everything usually was.
Nick ran up the stone steps and was about to open the door until he heard her crying. What the fuck did he just do?!? He was an asshole, he loved her, loved her more than anything and now he just caused her so much pain. He felt his fists tighten and he violently slammed the side of the house, causing his knuckles to bleed. He felt the liquid form in his eyes and escape down his cheek. He fucked up big time, making the only woman that probably ever loved him, hate him. “I’m sorry, Kim…” he choked. He then jumped down the stone steps and ran into his car and sped off.
Kimberly slowly stood up and looked out the window when she heard his wheels skid down the street. What took him so long to leave? She didn’t even care; she slowly made her way through the apartment and found Laura and Ronny in the living room watching a movie on the couch. His arm was around her and her head was on his shoulder.
“What’s wrong with you?” Questioned Ronny, with a raised eyebrow once he saw she was crying.
She didn’t answer him and slowly made her way up the stairs. “Kim?” Called Laura, “What happened? Are you okay?” She frantically asked, almost pretending she cared.
She turned to her so-call friend and cleared her throat and hoarsely said, “Dave and I broke up.”
“Well, I told you he was a jerk. But do you listen to me? No….so don’t go crying about it.”
Kimberly looked at her appalled, “Fuck you!” She then rushed up the stairs and threw herself on the bed, muffled her tears with the pillow. She would do anything to take back everything…she missed him…missed him so much and now he was out of her life for good. It was probably for the best considering she just ruined his….
