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Chapter One Hundred-Twelve
Point of View: Nick



My eyes were closed. I was laying on my stomach, my head turned to the right so my face wasn't buried in the pillow.

I'd been having the most fantastic dreams. It's amazing what medicine will do to a guy's head.

I felt a hand brushing my cheek so gently... and I hummed happily. I could feel the tight bandages that wrapped around my torso, and one on the back of my neck and head, where my hairline usually was. I ached, but it was a dull, faraway kind of ache.

My eyes slowly blinked open.

Zoe was there. Zoe was leaning close, her eyes misty, her hand on my cheek.

I blinked up at her, my own eyes filling with tears. I was so glad to see her. "Zoe," I breathed.

She smiled a sad little smile, "Morning sunshine," she whispered.

I went to move my hand to hers but it was cuffed to the bed. I frowned, remembering. I looked at Zoe. "How did you get here?"

"You're at the hospital," she explained.

"They let you just come in to see me?" I asked.

Zoe hesitated.

"What'd you do?" I asked.

Zoe smiled.

"You're bad."

"I know. But you don't need to be alone right now," she whispered, "I had to see you."

"I was so worried about you," I told her, remembering pacing the cell the night before, listening to Leon screaming, and thinking about her and the fire and everything...

So fucking much had happened in twenty-four hours' time, it almost seemed crazy to believe it had only been that long.

"I'm okay," Zoe whispered. She smoothed my hair away from my forehead and laid a gentle kiss on it. I closed my eyes, content. She brushed my cheek again. "It's going to be okay, Nicky," she whispered.

Normally I hate being called Nicky.

Only one person - Howie - can normally get away with it.

Well, two now.

"How can it be okay?" I asked. I looked up at her.

Zoe smiled, "Because, you're a strong, beautiful man and you'll remain so through anything that happens. You're going to come through this an even better, more loving person than you already are, with some more experiences under your belt. Think of it as a learning time, a time of growing." She used her thumb to wipe away a stray tear that had fallen from my eye. "You're a good kid, Nick," she said. "I'm proud of you, and I wish you were my kid."

She slid her hand under my cheek that was pressed against the pillow. It felt so good and I nestled my face into it and closed my eyes, breathing in the scent of her palm. It was so comforting... I started falling asleep, my consciousness slipping away slowly.

"Things would've been so different if I were your mother," she said absently, as though she were thinking more than she were speaking to me.

"Yeah they would've," I answered, more than half asleep, my lips moving were touching the skin on the heel of her hand.

Zoe took a deep, shaking breath. "I may not have been there when you were a boy, Nick," she said quietly, solemnly, "But I will be there for you forever now, I promise."

"I love you," I mumbled, the words breath and a couple of muted tones, that I'm not even certain she understood as I fell back asleep, my face in her hand...