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Chapter One Hundred-Eighty
Point of View: Nick


Dirk's eyes were solemn. I swallowed.

"Well, before it all started, I went to Walmart with Zoe and Kayla, dressed as Spiderman..." I saw Kayla smile at me from her seat at the memory.

Dirk laughed. "Dressed as Spiderman?" he asked. The jury laughed, too. "Why the hell would you do that?" Dirk asked.

I shrugged, "It's fun to be crazy sometimes."

"Were you on drugs at that point?" Dirk asked.

I shook my head, "I know going to Walmart dressed as Spiderman kind of would make you think I was, but really, I wasn't. It was just in fun. I told a kid to eat spinach." I smirked and the jury laughed again. "He asked his mom for a can of spinach 'cos Spidey said so..."

Dirk smiled. "Good deed of the day. Making kids eat their veggies..." he paused. "And what happened when you got home?"

"Well, Krystal was at the house," I said, thinking back. "I knew it when Zoe pulled into my driveway and Krystal's car was in the driveway."

"Now were you still going out with Krystal at this point?" I shook my head no. "So you weren't expecting her that night?"

"Not at all," I answered.

"Before you continue, Nick, I have a couple of questions about your relationship with Krystal," Dirk said. He rubbed his chin, "So you were involved in a long term relationship, as you stated for Mr. Walters."

"Yeah," I nodded.

"And when did that relationship dissolve?" he questioned.

I pursed my lips, "I'm... well, I'm not really sure."

"Why?"

"Well, we never really talked about it."

"What do you mean?" Dirk asked.

"I didn't know she'd left me," I answered. "I found out while I was in rehab. She was on the news one night at an awards show or something and she was there with that guy-- her boyfriend. Um." I racked my brain. What was that shithead's name? "Donnie? Derry?"

"Desi?" Dirk asked.

"Yeah, him. He was a dancer on her tour. They got together while I was in rehab."

"Actually," Dirk said. He went back to his briefcase and pulled out an envelope. "I would like to submit to the court a file of seventeen photographs, taken by various photographers of the paparazzi, proving that Krystal was involved with Desi Hernandez at least two weeks before Nick entered rehabilitation treatments." Dirk looked at me. "I'm sorry Nick, but Krystal was playing you."

I wasn't shocked, but my heart sank. I thought she'd just broken up with me terribly. I didn't know I'd been cheated on. I hung my head. It's not like I hadn't had a couple one night stands during the duration of our time together, though, so I really had no right to complain.

"Nick," Dirk said gently, "Did you know that Krystal was cheating on you prior to seeing her that night at your house?"

I looked up at him. My throat felt tight. "I didn't know -" I paused and took a deep breath. I can't cry. This isn't worth crying about. Fuck. closed my eyes. "I didn't know she'd cheated on me at all," I answered.

A slight murmur went through the jury. When I opened my eyes, everything was blurry through tears that weren't coming. I rolled my eyes up and set my jaw. I could feel their eyes all on me. I didn't wanna cry. What the fuck.

"So she was at your house?" Dirk asked, rerouting the conversation.

"Yeah," I gasped, composure starting to return.

"Just hanging out waiting for you?" Dirk asked.

"No," I answered, "She was - I dunno, she was pissed or something... She trashed my place before I got back. And she was really, really angry..." I shook my head, trying to remember the night. "She was freaking out, and then she wanted to have sex and I turned her away because she was high."

Dirk nodded. "Okay, so she was under the influence that evening?"

"Yeah," I whispered. "And she stormed out the door when I didn't wanna sleep with her 'cos of it, and I chased her outside to the driveway, but she almost ran me over with her car, and I backed down and let her leave." I took a deep breath. "I tried to stop her, I know it's not safe to drive under the influence..." My eyes traveled to Zoe, who smiled sadly.

"Yes, that's right, you'd been taking rehabilitated driving lessons from the master -" Dirk turned around and waved a hand at Zoe, "Zoe Sinclaire is a very well respected driving instructor in the area." He smiled, then turned back to me. "So after Krystal left, Nick... Take us into what happened next."

I stared at my hands. "I... I got stupid."

"Got stupid?"

I nodded. "I felt terrible that she'd left, and I wanted her to come back so I knew she was safe... And I didn't really think anything through, I kind of tend to act dumb sometimes... But... I- I went and did a line of coke..."

"And how did this help?"

"I thought if I did coke, maybe Krystal would come back because I'd be fun again... I'd be me again. She'd accused me of thinking I was better than her or whatever, but I don't think that. I never thought that." I paused. "So I did the coke to show her I'd do anything for her, that I was just as bad as she was..."

"And then what?"

"Then I called her. On her cell phone."

"Was she driving at that point?"

"Yes."

"Isn't that against the law in California?"

I nodded. "Zoe gets pissed if the cell goes off while I'm driving. She makes me mute it or turn it off." Zoe smiled again.

"Did Krystal answer the phone?"

"Yes."

"Would you call Krystal a reckless driver?" Dirk asked.

Before I could answer, Walters stood up, "Objection. This is speculation."

"Overruled," the judge muttered.

Dirk looked at me. I wasn't sure if I was allowed to answer. "Nick?" he prompted.

"Yeah, she was reckless," I nodded.

Dirk nodded. "Okay, so what did you say to her on the phone?"

"It's kinda hazy. Everything from this point is. I mean, I was high, so..."

"Right."

"Well I told her I wanted to have sex, and that I wanted her to come back, and she refused. She started crying."

"Crying about what?"

I paused. "Well, you know girls..."

"What was said that made her start crying Nick?"

"I told her I was gonna do a line and she said please don't do it," I answered. "But I'd already done it, it was too late to ask me not to, yanno?"

Dirk nodded. He stared at me, "Then what?"

"She said she was pregnant."

"Pregnant?" Dirk asked. He thought a moment. "Now is it true that you'd been apart for quite some time on the tour?" he asked.

I nodded.

"And how many times had you seen Krystal on the tour?"

"We only had one tour date that lined up so we could," I answered, "It was the night I got in a fight with AJ in the bar."

Dirk had returned to the desk and pulled out a newspaper clipping from his briefcase. "I would like to submit to the court as evidence this news paper article, dated one month prior to Nick's admission to rehab - so two and a half months from the date of Krystal's alleged murder - detailing the fight Nick has just mentioned."

Why the hell is that evidence? I wondered.

"So other than that night at the club," Dirk asked, "When was the last time you'd seen Krystal?"

"It'd been a long time," I answered.

"Days? Weeks? Months?"

"Since before the tour started..." I answered. "She drove me to the airport."

Dirk held up another laminated paper. "And I'd also like to submit this tour schedule, detailing all 38 originally scheduled dates on the Backstreet Boys tour across the US."

I creased my forehead. What the hell? I looked across the crowd, and I saw Kevin's eyes had lit up.

Dirk stepped over to me again. "Your tour started four months prior to this event, correct?"

I racked my brain. "Yeah," I answered. "Where are you going with this dude?"

The jury laughed.

"Well, Nick, you're being accused of murdering Krystal on the basis that your motive was anger that she cheated on you, which you didn't know about, and on the grounds that you were pissed because she was pregnant with your child."

"Yeah but I wasn't."

"Which is okay, because it wasn't your child."

"What?" I blinked in surprise.

Dirk nodded. "Yeah, Nick. Medical records showed that at the time of her death, Krystal was four months pregnant. Because they start the count of pregnancy from the last day of the mother's last menstrual cycle, she was actually slightly less than four months pregnant. That time frame means there was no way you impregnated her before going on tour, and she was already pregnant by the time you saw her during the tour."

The jury was nodding... Kevin was beaming... Krystal's mother had a shocked expression on her face as she stared at me. Mr. Walters was fucking livid.

The world was kinda spinning around me.

"So it was..."

"I don't know whose it was, Nick, but it wasn't yours."

Relief splashed over me. I had one less thing to eat me up inside.