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“When are you gonna let it go man?”

AJ broke himself out of his trance to look over at his younger friend, who was standing before him. They were sitting in their tour bus, waiting for their road manager to confirm their stay at yet another hotel in Mansfield, Massachusetts.

“What are you talking about?” AJ asked in a monotone voice, trying to play it off as if he didn’t know what Nick was talking about, but he knew very well. In his hand he twirled around an abandoned engagement ring.

“You know what I’m…” Nick stopped himself, knowing he’d be wasting his breath explaining something he already knew. “I just hate seeing you do this to yourself.”

“Do what to myself?” AJ snapped, “What exactly am I doing to myself Nick? I ain’t drinking, I ain’t using, so what exactly am I doing to myself?”

Nick closed his eyes, “That’s not what I meant.” As of lately, AJ had a short fuse with everyone. Whatever you’d say to him, he’d easily take your words and twist them so that he was the victim. Nick knew he couldn’t lose his cool with the way AJ was acting, knowing it would be like setting off a bomb if the both of them were to get worked up. He’s learned to just bite his tongue and take whatever AJ threw at him, trying to be understanding of what he was going through.

“Maybe that’s what you want to see, huh? Do you want to see me do something to myself? You want me to fail you too?”

Nick rolled his eyes and sighed heavily, “My god, cut the bullshit already AJ.” Although he knew he couldn’t lose his cool, hearing AJ play victim once more drove him to the edge. “I’m sick and tired of you trying to make everybody feel sorry for your ass. We ain’t doing nothing but trying to help you and all you do is throw shit back at us.”

AJ released a maniacal laugh, “Fuck you Nick, you wanna talk about bullshit? Spare me from yours! I don’t say shit to you guys, all I want is to be left alone but your persistent ass has to play fucking Dr. Phil and involve yourself in shit that has nothing to do with you!”

“Well, excuse me for fucking caring!” Nick fired back. “Every single little thing we say to you AJ, you always get so defensive. We can’t say or do shit without feeling like we’re fucking walking on eggshells with you! When I said you need to stop doing this to yourself, I meant you walking around with this sour ass attitude, waiting and wanting pity from whomever. It’s been a fucking year since ya’ll broke up dude, move… the fuck… on!”

“You know what Nick? Go fuck yourself! The day you profess your love to someone, ask for their hand in marriage only for them to take it back a day before the wedding, then you come and talk to me. You have no idea what I’m going through because you’re too much of a fucking pussy when it comes to commitment, so fuck off and leave me the fuck alone!”

Nick stared long and hard at the broken man he no longer knew. “No wonder Rochelle left your sorry ass.” he managed to say before he could even stop himself.

The bus fell eerily silent. The only sound that was heard was a light ping sound of the engagement ring AJ had let slip through his hand and land on the table. Before Nick could take back his words, AJ launched himself from where he sat, over the table and tackled Nick by his midsection. Air left them both and grunts immediately sounded out when they connected with the floor of the bus.

Dazed, Nick looked up to see AJ above him, pulling his arm up and his balled fist back, ready to fly it forward and have it connect with his face. Nick quickly caught AJ’s flying fist and brought it to the side. Where the fuck are Brian and Howie? Nick thought to himself as he caught AJ’s other swinging fist. He knew what he had said struck a deep chord within AJ, and if there was a way he could take it back, he would, but the words have been spoken and the damage has been done. No one could help him out of this situation but himself.

“AJ, look.” Nick shouted, trying to restrain the smaller thrashing man. “I’m sor-” his words were immediately cut off, for AJ’s fist had finally connected with his cheek.

“FUCK YOU!” AJ screamed as he tried to punch Nick once again.

Nick hoped AJ’s screaming would catch someone’s, anyone’s attention and would come in and pull AJ off of him. Years ago, Nick’s reaction to being hit was to hit back, but now Nick knew better… and in this situation, he knew he was the reason why he was getting attacked now. Hitting AJ back would only make it worse, so he tried hard to stop his older friend from beating him to a pulp. Though Nick was bigger, AJ always did have a hidden rage that was quite uncontrollable once it was released.

“FUCK YOU NICK, FUCK YOU!” AJ was now crying as he tried and tried again to hit the man underneath him. He no longer saw him as a friend, but a man who had hurt him, pushed him to the edge. Whoever said “sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you.” was a fucking liar.

Just as he cranked his arm back to deliver another punch, he was reeled back by a strong pair of arms. He tried to break free from whatever was holding him back, trying to launch himself back at Nick to inflict physical pain, return the amount of pain he was feeling at that moment. Brian strained to hold the smaller man back, but was finally able to feel AJ’s anger crumbling slowly but surely.

Meanwhile, Howie had helped Nick up from the ground. He hoped Nick wouldn’t try to go after AJ in retaliation, knowing that he was no match for Nick, but to his surprise, Nick stood there, staring at AJ in defeat.

“Let go of me!” AJ growled out, trying to shake himself from out of Brian’s hold.

“I’ll let you go when you calm down.” Brian replied, tightening his arms around AJ once more when he felt him trying to fight back.

Taking a deep breath in, AJ tried to calm himself so that Brian would let him go. “I’m fucking calm.” he gritted out.

Slowly, Brian loosened his arms, only to have AJ break away from him. His arms immediately shot out, in case he had to restrain him again, but AJ remained where he stood, shifting his weight from one leg to the other. His watery eyes bore deeply into Nick’s saddened ones, he refused to break his glare.

“AJ…” Nick sighed.

“Get… the fuck… outta my face.” AJ warned in a low, menacing tone.

Knowing it was no use trying to talk to the enraged man, Nick quickly turned around and began to leave, making sure to punch the wall of the bus on his way out, to help release the anger he felt with himself. “Hey!” Howie voiced, following Nick out to make sure that he would be okay.

When he was sure that both Nick and Howie were off the bus, Brian turned his attention back to AJ, who looked like he still needed time to calm down. He sighed, not liking how his brother was broken all over again. Instead of asking him what had happened between him and Nick, he decide to ask, “What do you want?”

AJ collapsed back down on the seat he was in earlier. “I just want to be left alone.” he replied before he buried his face into his hands.

Brian gave a slight nod, “Alright. I’m ready when you are.” he said, meaning he was ready to talk about whatever was bothering AJ when he was ready to talk about it. And with that, he left the bus too, deciding to check on Howie and Nick.

When AJ heard the bus door close, he lifted his face up from his hands, seeing the ring he was fiddling with earlier still on the table. It may have been a year since they’ve broken up, but he still held on to the ring, which signified the closest he’s ever been to true love, or at least what he thought was true love. He still held on to that ring in hopes that maybe one day she’ll come back to him. It may have been a year, but he still held on to that ring.

Pushing himself up from where he sat, he made his way towards the back of the bus where the bunks were located. He reached up to his bunk area and pulled out his duffle bag, placing it on the ground so he could rummage through it. Pushing his clothes aside, he shoved his hand deeper into the bag, glad his hand finally connected with what he was searching for. He pulled out a roped silver chain he had thrown in with his luggage and undid the clasp, threading the silver chain through the ring. He brought the necklace around his neck and fastened it, looking down to find the ring hanging snug against his chest.

Next thing on his agenda? He needed to get out of here, and fast. He wasn’t sure where he’d go, but he knew either Howie or Brian would be back to want to talk to him, and he didn’t want to stick around for that. Nor did he want to stick around for the awkwardness that would surely hang between he and Nick.

He rose up from the ground, grabbing his duffle bag and shoving it back into his bunk area. He patted his pockets down, feeling that he had both his wallet and cell phone. Satisfied with that much, he made his way towards the front of the bus, opening the door slowly and peering out. No one was around in sight; he figured Howie had probably led Nick into the hotel while Brian ushered the security in as well to help give him his privacy.

Sighing heavily, he stepped off the bus and began his trek to nowhere, wanting to get as far away from the hotel as possible so no one would stop him, and from there he would hail down a cab to take him wherever he wanted to go. But where exactly could he go in Massachusetts? He would think of that later.

The walk he had taken was a good five minutes away from the hotel, and he had yet to come across a single cab. Just when he was about to give up and head to the nearest bus stop, off in the distance he seen a lone cab heading his way.

“Finally.” AJ sighed as he began to wave the cab down.

To his luck, he noticed that the cab was empty as the driver slowed down and pulled off to the side of the road. Looking both ways to see no cars coming, AJ quickly jogged across the street over towards the cab, opening the door and jumping in the back.

“Thanks man.” AJ said as he closed the door.

“No problem man, where ya headed?” the man asked, his voice thick with a Boston accent.

AJ shrugged, “I don’t even know man, not from around here.”

The man turned a little in his seat, “Well, do you have an idea where you’d like to go?”

“As far away from Massachusetts as possible.”

The man chuckled, “Man, that’s quite a drive ya looking for. I’ll go ahead and do ya the next best thing, okay?”

“Yeah? What’s that?”

“It’s this little county down south of Massachusetts… it’s as far away as you’ll get from this state. You’ll have to take a ferry to get there, and you’ll probably have to wait till mornin’.”

“Morning?” AJ repeated. “There’s no boats or anything that could charter me out there tonight?”

The man shrugged as he pulled out onto the main road again, “Got this friend, Bobby, who owns a boat out at the harbah. For the right price I’m sure he could get you out there by tonight.”

AJ gave a small smile, “Really? I’d appreciate it man.”

“Natta problem!”

AJ reclined back in his seat, grateful that the man was of great help and service to him. “I’m sorry, but what did you say this place was again?”

“It’s a county… Dukes County.”