It took every fiber of my being to get up early and go to the gym, Nick had taken Jake for mthe night, leaving me a lot of time to think.
For once, I didn't drown my sorrows in ice cream. I didn't wallow over Oreos.
Instead, I thought about Nick.
Nick was a good guy. He was handsome. He was funny. We had chemistry.
We had Jake.
The problem was Lauren. Lauren had more than two years of history with him. He had proposed to her.
I have never in my life been the type of person to screw anyone else over. I've constantly been the screw-ee rather than the screw-er.
But I was getting sick of the footprints in my back. At first I thought that maybe my best course of action was to go back to thinking that I didn't need anyone. But, that was a lonely existance to look forward to. I deserved love.
And was it really so wrong to think that maybe Jake could have his mother and father together?
With each pounding footstep on the treadmill, I imagined myself becoming stronger. I was rationalizing. If Nick was so in love with Lauren, why would he kiss me? Would it be so hard to get him for good?
Was that what I wanted?
Yes.
"Try it at a higher angle. You'll get more of a workout on your lower legs."
I swatted at my hair and turned towards the sound of the voice.
"I'm sorry," I scanned his gym staff badge. "Micah, but I don't need help."
He smiled. Damnit, I couldn't even offend people when I tried. "Sorry. I have to fill my 'helpful tip' quota for the day."
I turned back to the treadmill. "Good luck with that."
"If you're ever interested, we have a full list of classes. Zumba's popular right now."
It was hard to breathe and talk at the same time. "My ass doesn't move to music. It's barely keeping up with the run."
Micah laughed. "It's all in the hips. Not the ass."
I didn't answer. The next time I looked, Mr. Helpful had gone. I slowed the treadmill to a slow five minute walk. After I hopped off and wiped the sweat pouring from my neck, I headed to the weights.
I had a mission. I was like Rocky. I was going to become a knock-out.
Operation Carter, here I come.
"I'm not sure I'm qualified."
"You're all I've got."
"I'm fresh out of rehab. What if I need to meditate? How can I meditate?"
I sighed. "J, I'll be gone an hour tops. I promise you that this won't screw up your meditation."
"Your kid better not cause me to drink."
We both smiled. It was cool that he could joke about it. I was tense enough as it is.
"Jake's an angel. Jake!"
Jake was currently flying through the house. I had made the mistake of taking him to the mall the night before and buying him those shoes with roller skates in the bottoms. He hadn't quite figured out the 'stop' portion.
"DADDY! LOOK! I'M ROW-IN!"
J and I watched him fly past. He slammed into the wall, fell on his butt, and started to laugh.
"One-hundred percent Carter," AJ declared. I slapped his back.
"Damn straight. That's my boy."
I walked over to Jake and stood him back up. He swished back and forth in my arms.
"Jake, my friend AJ is going to hang out with you for an hour. Is that okay?"
"Where ya goooo-in?"
"I've got to go to the dentist."
Okay, it was a lie. But it was a safe lie. There was no way Jake would want to go with me.
Sure enough, Jake wrinkled his nose. "I hope you don't have caw-a-titties."
AJ started to laugh. I kissed Jake's forehead. "I hope I don't either. Be good."
"Okay!" Jake looked up at AJ. "I like your neck picture."
"Do you want one?"
Jake looked excited. "Yeah!"
"Uh, J?"
J winked. He held up a temporary tattoo. I exhaled in relief.
Amazingly, I had a feeling a little time with a kiddo was going to be good therapy for J. I grabbed my keys.
"Be back soon!"
"What do you mean there's a problem with the scheduling?"
The woman on the other end of the phone was grating on my nerves. I smacked my forehead.
"Oprah's in charge of the scheduling. If she doesn't think there's a problem, there's not a problem."
The woman's voice grew to a feverish pitch.
"I'll make sure to pass along the message," I said. I hung up.
My desk was piled in work, none of which seemed overly earth-shattering. I had only been at my new job for a ridiculously short time and I was bored. I was pretty much required to buffer complaints and organize the company e-mails.
A field mouse could have handled it.
I knew there had to be a better job for me. The only issue was that I never took the initiative. I never took the chance.
But, that was old Shay. New Shay was full of chance.
New Shay threw the woman's phone message in the trash and brought up three sites chock full of job opportunities.
And, depending on what I found, New Shay was also tempted to throw her resume out there and hope for a catch.
My plan was simple. I was going to wait at the back entrance to the soundstage of Heartbeat until Kevin's slimy ass walked up. Then I was going to back him up against the wall and let him have it.
Unfortunately, I hadn't planned on Kevin showing up with balloon boobies.
Shay's sister was extremely unattractive. There's no doubt that I'm a boob man, but everything about her screamed fake L.A. She could have passed for a Paris clone.
And I hate Paris.
Balloon boobies had her hand in Kev's back pocket. His arm was draped over his shoulder. They stopped at the door and Kev kissed her neck. She giggled.
"We're late," she said.
"I think they'll forgive us," Kev teased.
My fingers curled into a fist. My plan wasn't going to work out perfectly. But I wasn't just going to walk away.
"We need to talk."
Kev's head twisted in my direction. "Wha--"
"We need to talk. ALONE."
Kev nudged her. "Go on."
"Are you sure? He looks mad."
Kev smiled. "Old friend. Go ahead."
We both waited until the door slammed shut behind her. The moment it did, I moved. I yanked Kevin.
He didn't budge.
"Why are you here?" he asked.
I was a tad taller than he was now. I glared at him. My last shred of respect for him was long gone.
"I'm here because of this game you're playing."
"What game?"
"With Shay."
Kev smirked. "I don't think I'm the one playing a game. She dumped me."
"So you date her sister?"
"I'm expanding my horizons."
"What is this, your mid-life crisis? Are you just sampling the whole Gerard buffet? Have you screwed her mom too?"
The worst part about the whole thing was that Kevin didn't deny it. I blanched.
"You're disgusting."
"This has nothing to do with you, Nick," Kev said impatiently.
"It has everything to do with me. You're messing with my family."
"Shay isn't your family."
I stepped back like he had hit me. "Yes, she is."
Kev shook his head. "When are you going to admit that you're fucking Lauren over with your obsession with Shay?"
"I'm not obsessed with her. She's the mother of my--"
"I didn't stand a chance because you couldn't stand the thought of her with me," Kev said coldly. "It's a shame, too. We were amazing together. You know, girls like that are great because they're so desperate for some dick they'll do anything. I knew it the minute I saw her walking through the parking lot. She was my perfect rebound."
I didn't ask him what he meant. I just processed the words and let them burn at me like acid.
And then I took a swing.
Kevin ducked and my knuckles scraped the brick building. He went to dodge me, but I got a leg out and he went flat on the ground. I body slammed him before flipping him over. MY bloody knuckles grabbed at his shirt. He turned his head and expelled a big drop of blood. He had busted his lip.
"If you ever try to contact her again, I will make your life a living hell. God, I don't know what happened between you and Kris, but she's better off without you. So's Mason. You're a total fuck up."
I spent too long talking. My mouth always gets me into trouble. Kev's elbow connected with my head, momentarily filling my vision with white bursts of light.
"Maybe I'm just taking a page from your book," he said. He scrambled to his feet and kicked me. "Fuck 'em and leave 'em. Right? The man who can't commit."
I pushed up off the ground. My ribs ached. Kev was breathing hard. We dodged each other for several mintues. I was faster than him; it was probably a result of Shay's punch to his nads. I had advantage.
"You're gonna need a little bit of realignment," I growled. I flung my entire weight into the forward momentum of my arm.
The crack of his jaw was oddly satisfying. I left him to crawl into the building, tail tucked and wounded.
Something told me he wouldn't be shooting any love scenes today.
