"I think he's going through a growth spurt. Plus, he got his cast off yesterday and he was looking forward to you coming home," I explained.
Nick was carrying Jake, who was fast asleep, his mouth open and his cheek nestled on his shoulder. Nick had the string of Jake's bright green dinner balloon wrapped around his wrist as we headed up the walk towards my front door.
"He just looked so cute falling asleep in his spaghetti," Nick whispered. I laughed and wiggled my key into the lock.
The house was dark, save for a small nightlight in the hallway. I clicked on the small lamp to the right of the door.
"I'll go put him to bed," Nick said. I nodded happily.
I had sensed a change in the air all during dinner. Nick and I had sat close together as Jake rambled a mile a minute, only pausing when Nick pulled out yet another gift and explained where he had gotten it.
Towards the end of dinner, as Jake was falling asleep into said spaghetti, Nick had paused, his hand on the bag he had brought in. He looked thoughtful...a little hesitant.
"I got something for you, too," he said a little sheepishly. My eyes had widened.
"For me?"
From the bag he produced a thin, white box which he handed to me. I took it, shaking my head.
"You didn't have to do this," I said.
"It's just a little something," Nick said quietly.
Nestled inside the box was a beautiful white shell necklace. I held it up, watching the light reflecting off of the perfect purity of it.
"I love it."
I love it, I thought as I touched the necklace nestled around my neck. I heard Jake's door close softly and watched Nick re-enter the living room. We stared at each other; my breath caught.
"I need to talk to you," Nick said quietly.
"Sure," I said. I settled down on the couch, tucking my legs beneath me. Nick swung himself around beside me.
Considering he had been on a plane for almost a day, he looked amazing. He was wearing a dress shirt, rolled up at the sleeves. It was amazingly distracting that all that was keeping the thing together were eight little buttons.
"I've been thinking," he said. "A lot. About me and Lauren. And you and me."
"Oh?"
He lowered his head; it reminded me of the same sad look Jake gave me when he was about ready to cry.
"I don't deserve either of you," he said after a very pregnant pause. "You both are too good for me."
"Seriously?" I said. "How can you say that?"
"It's true. I can't commit to Lauren; I dicked you around. Lauren's done nothing wrong; neither have you."
"So you're really going to use the 'it's me, not you' defense?" I said. Nick's eyes flashed.
"Yes."
"Well," I said. My hand shot out; I couldn't resist stroking one of the buttons any longer. "The problem is that we have Jake. And I know you're not going to run off on Jake."
"Of course not," Nick said. I saw his eyes drop to my hand, but he didn't say anything. I slid my finger beneath the material, popping the button.
"I'm not expecting a wedding ring," I said. My fingers slid up and undid the next button.
"I know," Nick whispered. I leaned in close, undoing the second and third. His arm wrapped around my waist.
"And, maybe it's my turn to dick you around."
Here's one common truth: I always think with the wrong head. I see a beautiful girl and I can't help but imagine what it would be like to sleep with her.
It was how I got with Lauren. It was how Shay and I had gotten Jake.
My little confession to Shay had taken a lot. I was admitting I was totally, inexcusably, imperfect. I was trying to let her know that I couldn't chose her or Lauren.
And yet, I had bought her a present, not Lauren. And I was enjoying the way she was toying with my buttons and acting like she didn't give a flying fuck that I was a screw-up. My eyes bore into her clevage and I felt the stirrings of the wrong head thinking again.
"If we do this..." I said. Shay's head lowered; I felt her lips press against my bare skin. Her hands shot up to my shoulders and tugged. The rest of the buttons fell away. My hands splayed across her back.
"If we do this, all that's going to happen is you're going to wake up in my bed tomorrow," Shay said breathlessly. "Can you handle that?"
I had first noticed it at the airport; but it was unmistakable now. Shay had found herself. She didn't hedge, she didn't dance around what she really wanted. I slid my hand under her shirt, finding the hint of the little thong in the string that slid beneath my thumb.
Her kisses made their way up my throat and to my scratchy chin. She smiled.
"Didn't you ask me if I wanted to take a chance?"
I leaned back, exposing her lips to the air for just a second before I brought mine crashing down on them.
Shay cupped my face. I slid my hands down the back of her jeans. It was just us. On the couch. Again.
"Let's," Shay said pulling away. She kissed me again. "Go." Her teeth clamped down on my bottom lip.
She didn't need to specify where she wanted to go. I knew. And, since she was so insistant and our one and only time had been so sloppy, I also knew I wasn't going to let her forget this moment. I stood up as she fell back on the couch. With a grin I grabbed her legs. She let out a shriek as she bounced to the floor.
"What are you doing?"
"We're going," I said.
She was light; I could feel how well-toned her calf muscles had gotten. She giggled hysterically as I dragged her down the hall to her bedroom. She sat up, wrapping her arms around my legs as we stumbled into the doorway. I crashed to the ground.
It was like a boxing match, but one that was destined to have a good outcome. Shay closed the door and her arms wrapped around me. We rolled around for a few minutes, until at last I got the upper hand and pinned her wrists. She smiled up at me; her legs hooking around my hips. She pulled her entire body off the ground and rubbed right up against me.
I was senseless. "Damnit, Shay."
"There's something to be said about flexibility," she teased.
I let her hands go. My fingers fell to her buttons. One by one, inch by delicious inch, her creamy skin nestled behind a lacy, barely there bra met my eyes. I lowered my head, running my teeth along the smooth contor. Her breath was warm against the top of my head.
I had lost my shirt halfway down the hall; now Shay's hands ran along my waistband, her fingers stroking the light hair that dipped down towards my pelvis. Her palm pressed against my zipper, already straining. I tugged away the last few buttons of her blouse, finally yanking it away just as she slid my jeans off my hips.
"You look amazing," I whispered. I unhooked her bra and sat back. Shay's head fell back as my hand trailed between her breasts, along her ribs, and trailing down to the perfectly defined stomach muscles and naval. She shivered slightly as I yanked off her jeans. Her hips were wide, but there wasn't any fat on them. She must have been working out for eight hours a day for such a transformation to take place. My fingers greedily stoked the thin material of the thong. She flushed.
And then she pushed me down. She straddled my waist and ran a hand through her hair, pushing it out of her eyes.
"Not this time, Carter," she said.
What could I do? No sane man would argue with that. Her fingers slid under the waistband of my boxers. She stood up and slid them off. Our eyes were glued to each other as she wiggled out of her panties. She knelt down beside me, her knees touching my ribs, and ran her fingers down my length.
"I'm clean now, by the way," I said stupidly. Shay smiled.
"No clap?"
I laughed. "No clap."
I about lost it as I watched her bring her hand to her lips. Slowly, her tongue wet the area and reached down for me. A moment later her breath was on me and then her glorious lips, wet and firm, sliding down. Everything was done slowly; the complete opposite of how it had been the first time. I reached out and stroked her breasts; her nipples hardened at the slightest touch. As if in response, her teeth ran along me.
I've gotten blowjobs a million times. No, seriously, a million times. Or close to it. But, I was usually able to multi-task. This time, I was pretty much lost in the stupor of Shay's mouth and her amazing gag reflex. I knew I had grown slick myself, it combining with Shay's own moistness as she took one last, long plunge that made me let out an ape-like moan.
"That was incredible," I gasped. Shay ran a hand through her hair again, looking tusseled and dirty. But, dirty in a good way. My arms locked around her and I lifted her easily onto the bed, my hand sliding from her knee down to the deep inviting V. Her hands dug into the light comforter as I slid my fingers in, her muscles contracting erotically. My other hand slid up, stroking her neck.
"I love your fingers," she gasped. "Your hands are so fucking hot."
"My hands?" I asked. She nodded, her bottom lip sliding into her mouth, a perfect row of top white teeth showing as her face contorted. My hand fell from hr neck as I turned slightly, pressing kisses down the inside of her thighs.
"What about my lips, Shay? Do you like my lips?" I asked.
"I love your lips," she replied.
"How about my tongue?"
"Your--Ohhhh."
The reality of sex is that it's dirty. I could sit back and say that we just did plain old, simple sweet missionary and concluded our reconnection for the evening. But, that would be a total understatement. It was like we had just been given a ticket to theme parks we hadn't visited since they had just opened and we were both determined to see every square inch before we done. That's why the night stretched out long before us. We were both a tangle of stickiness and the air all around us was permeated with sex long before we had finally completed the act.
"Do you have something?" she whispered as I nuzzled her ear. I smiled.
"I'm prepared. You?"
She nodded. I leaned over the bed, Shay's hands pressed on my ass and grabbed for my jeans. I pulled out the condom AJ had given me - 'just in case' and turned back.
"Last chance to run," I said. Shay shook her head and grabbed the little foil wrapper.
"I'm not going anywhere, Nick," she said softly.
I had known the answer even before asking the question. And, if truth be told, even if she had tried to run...
I would have done anything to bring her back.
