are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."
- Ralph W. Emerson
Chapter 8
Explorer Max
"Knock, knock."
Max pulled open the flap on his box and peeked out, then quickly scurried backward to make room for Nick. Nick slid inside the box and pulled the flap shut behind him. He looked at Max.
It was sunny outside, and Mimi had dragged the cardboard box out onto the grass again. She figured if nothing else, Max could breathe semi-fresh air through the crack in the box. It was better than nothing.
"Hey Max," Nick said, "I have a surprise for you."
Max eyed Nick.
"Wanna know what it is?" Nick asked.
Max nodded.
"C'mon," Nick crawled back out of the box and held the flap open behind him for Max to follow suit. Max sat in the box and stared out hesitantly, studying the knees of Nick's jeans. Nick bent down and peered into the box. "Maa-aaax," he called, "Are you comin' lil buddy?"
Max hesitated.
"It's a really cool surprise," Nick persisted.
Max crawled out of the box and stood beside it, staring up at Nick with big, wide eyes. Nick smiled. "See? Not so bad. C'mon, the first part's in my car."
Nick enthusiastically lead Max to the silver car that sat at the edge of the yard, by the street. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys, unlocking the door, and opened the back passenger door. He reached inside and withdrew a pair of two yellowish-tan canvas hats with long brown drawstrings. He sat down on the seat and motioned Max over to stand before him. He smiled into Max's eyes and held up one of the hats. "This, Max, is your explorer hat."
Max looked at the hat.
"When you have on this hat," Nick explained, "You're no longer just Max," he said, and he slid the cap onto Max's head, "You're Explorer Max," he continued, pulling the drawstring. "And Explorer Max isn't afraid of anything at all! Explorer Max is the most bravest person in the entire world."
Max touched the strands of the drawstring that hung down from his chin.
"And when I have my explorer hat on," Nick added, pulling his own onto his head, "I'm Explorer Nick." He tugged his own drawstring up to his chin, making a silly face that almost made Max giggle. "I'm not as brave as you are, but I'm close." He smiled and grabbed Max's hand again. "Can you feel the brave seeping into you from the hats?" he asked.
Max shrugged.
"These hats travelled all the way from Africa," Nick said. "They were used on a safari. You know what a safari is, Max?"
Max shook his head no.
"A safari is where people go on this craaazy adventure and they see all kinds of wild animals!" his voice pitched with excitment, "Like lions and tigers and elephants and giraffes and zebras and warthogs and antelope and buffalo and babboons and rhinos and hippos and aligators and bears and -" Nick stopped abruptly, and a smile spread across his face, "And who knows what else," he breathed the last bit.
Max's eyes had grown wide with all the names of animals that Nick had listed off.
Nick slid off the seat of the car, onto his knees and grabbed the edge of Max's blue jacket. "Do you wanna see all those animals, Max?"
Max nodded.
Nick smiled, "Close your eyes."
Max closed his eyes.
"Now, imagine in your head that we're in Africa. It's a jungle," Nick's voice was barely above a whisper. "And everywhere you look theres trees and vines and leaves and mud and... and moss." Max's mouth curled into a smile as Nick's voice painted a picture in Max's mind. "And you and me, we're exploring, seeking out the most amazing thing in the whole world."
"What?" Max asked.
The best part about Max, Nick thought, was how he spoke when he was most into the moment. Nick smiled. "The perfect hot fudge sundae."
Max opened his eyes. "In the jungle?" He looked at Nick like he was crazy.
Nick nodded, "In the jungle."
Max hesitated.
"Trust me, Max," he said. "Do you trust me?"
Max stared up at Nick, into his wildly hopeful brown eyes. He's so much like you were, Max heard Mimi's words echo through his head. Nick, Max thought, understands. Nick, Max thought, made him feel un-invisible. No grown up had ever done that - not even Mimi, in all her kindness.
Surely, if someone could make a little boy like Max visible, then that someone could be trusted. Couldn't they?
Or was Nick just like every other adult that Max had ever met in his whole life?
Nick held out his hand.
Max stared at it; and then Max looked at his own hand for a long moment, then looked at Nick's again. It was big, wide, with long, thin fingers that had chewed-down nails with dirt stuck under them. Nick had wide knuckles and writer's bump on his left hand.
Nick could still remember the first time a man had extended a hand to him, how afraid he'd been to trust a grown up's palm... how scared he was, certain that men were dangerous creatures, that they could strike at any moment.
"I won't let anything hurt you, Max," Nick said in a low, serious tone.
Max slowly lifted his arm and dropped his little hand into Nick's outstretched palm and NIck wrapped his fingers around it, folding Max's hand into his own.
"Okay then," Nick stood up, kicked his car door closed, hit the lock and tucked the key into his pocket once more. "Let's go on our big adventure. Don't forget to imagine the trees and the moss and the mud and the - the -" Nick pointed upwards and gasped, "The monkeys!"
"Monkeys?" Max asked, he looked up where Nick was pointing and squinted against the afternoon sun.
"Use your imagination, Max!" Nick called, "Quick, the monkeys!"
Nick broke into a short jog, tugging Max along at a run, headed down the sidewalk. Max looked over his shoulder and slowly, slowly... the fence became tall, wavering trees that loomed over their heads and the telephone poles more trees, covered with thick moss, and their wires vines from which long, shaggy-haired orangutangs hung, with long, malicious teeth like a shark's, chasing after the two explorers, as they ran over roots and underbrush, Nick's heels kicking up mud as they went, splashing and laughing through the jungle.
