~ 2 ~

A Nervous Energy

Date: May 17th, 1999      

Time: 7:15 PM

Place: New York City (4 days before the emergency landing) 

+ Nick +

I can’t seem to sit still, yeah I know…big shocker! But tonight it’s even worse than usual. Our album comes out tomorrow and I can’t wait! I am so excited about it. It feels different this time around. That’s what everyone is saying. There’s a different kind of vibe.

“Get here already!!”

The talking in the room stopped and everyone stared at me. I guess I said that out loud. Brian looked particularly amused. “Who are you talking to?”

“Tomorrow!”

Everyone laughed.

The room was filled with people, most of which I had never even seen before. Most of them were from our new management company The Firm, but some I swear just came out of nowhere. We were having a pre-release party.

I don’t really enjoy these things. I find them incredibly boring. Maybe if I was allowed to get shit faced drunk and pee on the plants or something I’d find this a little more entertaining, but I have an image to maintain or so I’m told. So, I’m just kind of counting down the minutes when I can go back to my hotel room and play some videogames with Brian who looks equally bored out of his mind.

Once the attention was turned away from me, B-Rok made his way over. “So, you a little excited there?” He gave me one of his sarcastic smiles. Not many people realize how sarcastic Brian can be. His humor can be as dry as they come but he’s really good at hiding that from people.

“Do you think they’d notice if we left?”

“Uh…no, I mean it’s only a party thrown in our honor. Why would they miss us?”

See? That’s what I mean!

Howie was standing off to the side talking to three random women who looked a lot like hookers. “Let’s throw something at Howie!” I suddenly felt impulsive and took what I think was a crab cake off a tray and flung it at D’s head.

It hit him on his forehead and his expression was priceless. He looked over at me with his ‘I’m going to kill you’ look.

“Wow that was random.” Brian laughed.

I waved at Howie as he gave me the finger. I’m hoping no one saw me being… quotey fingers, bad. The last thing I want is a lecture tonight. Instinctively I looked around the room for Kevin and when I didn’t see him I smirked. Mission accomplished!

“How much longer do you think this shmooze fest is going to last?”

Brian shrugged at me, “No idea.”

“I want to go back to the room! It looks like Kevin ducked out and I don’t see AJ either.”

“They might have gone outside for some air.”

I grabbed Brian’s arm and yanked him out of the room, “Sounds like a plan, lets do that!”

“Ow! Good lord child, you just about yanked my arm out of its socket!”

“Sorry!”

“No you’re not!”

“Okay, I lied, so sue me!” I started running down the hall, “Bet I can beat you out there!”

I left him before I could hear his answer but soon enough he had managed to catch me and of course blew right by me and out the door.

“What the hell are you guys doing?” Can you guess who that is?

“Hey Kevin…” I paused to take catch my breath, “We were having a race.”

“I wish the two of you would grow up!”

He shook his head and turned to Kristin and asked her to get him another drink. She smiled at me. I’m convinced she is secretly in love with me and one day we’re going to run away together. She’s hot, much too hot for Kevin.

AJ walked over to us carrying his own little tray of mini wieners. “This is cool, isn’t it?”

I grabbed a hot dog and nodded, “Now this isn’t too bad. Maybe we should just hang out here for the rest of the night.”

Brian grabbed a mini dog as well, “Sounds like a plan to me.”

We were on the roof of the hotel which was set up to look like a garden. Quite a few partygoers were out here as well but it wasn’t nearly as claustrophobic as it was inside. Hopefully no one will realize this is here. I walked over to the edge and peered out into the night. New York is always so loud but you could also hear the dimmest sound of cheering coming from below. “There are people down there waiting for us.” I said, motioning for Brian to come join me by the ledge.

He put his hands out in front of him, “No thanks, I’m good.”

“Don’t be a chicken Brian. It’s not that far up!”

“Nick we’re about 30 stories up.”

“Pfft!”

He shook his head and laughed at me. “How many people do you think are out there?”

“I don’t know.”

“Guess.”

“Um…50.”

“Wow, you suck at guessing.”

He laughed again, “Okay wise ass, how many people do you think are down there?”

I moved closer to the ledge and actually placed one leg over as if I was going to stand on the small railing. He immediately came over and grabbed my arm, “Get off of there!”

“Relax Brian, it’s not like I’ll jump or anything.”

“Yeah but you’re so klutzy you’d accidentally fall to your death, then who would I always beat at basketball?”

I felt a small pinch on my shoulder, “Will you try to calm yourself down please?” Kevin said through gritted teeth. The guy really needs to relax. I need to calm down? He is the one that needs to take, like, fifteen chill pills.

“Sorry, I’m just excited and have a ton of nervous energy.”

He let go of me and pat my shoulder this time, “I know Nick, but you falling off the hotel roof won’t do much for our career.”

“I don’t know, dead pretty boys are always a good seller.”

AJ cares so much, it’s touching, really.

“I would feel a whole lot better if you all backed away from the ledge.”

Poor scared of heights Brian.

We all moved closer to him and away from the crowd of fans screaming below. “Are you guys ready for what’s coming tomorrow?” Kevin asked all reflective and Kevin-ish.

“You’re making it sound like the plague, Kevin.” I can smart ass with the best of them!

He gave me a look of utter annoyance. I think I shall name that the Kevin look. “You know what I mean. Are you ready for the whirlwind? It feels different this time, doesn’t it?”

“I have a feeling after this album comes out things will never be the same.” Brian said in earnest.

Kristin came back with a glass of champagne for Kevin and one for herself. “Hi boys.” She winked at me. I’m telling you…she TOTALLY wants me!

 “Brian, where’s Leighanne?” She asked as she took a sip.

“She had a headache so she decided to skip the party. She’ll be around all day tomorrow though.”

“Good, I’ll need someone to pal around with.”

Yeah, pal around with miss needy neederson so this way I can have my best friend on one of the most important days of our lives!

I was kind of bummed that I didn’t really have anyone around to share the album release with. Howie’s sister Polly was coming up tomorrow and AJ’s mom was already in town. Kevin had Kris and Brian had big boobs McGee. My mother was going to come, but we ended up having a fight about Aaron and publicity and she backed out. Told me if I didn’t appreciate my family I can celebrate with my fake one. She’s jealous of the guys because she knows I care about them and love them about as much as I care and love her. The only difference is, the guys love me back.

Anyway, enough about that, I refuse to get all down. Tomorrow is a day I’ve been looking forward to ever since we started to record for this album. A waitress walked by and I took a glass of champagne right off the tray and held it up, “Let’s drink a toast!” I said holding the glass in the air.

AJ and Brian grabbed glasses and held theirs out as well as Kevin and Kris, “What are we toasting?”

“To Millennium!”

We clinked glasses and just as I was about to take a sip, my glass was taken away.

“Seriously dude? It’s only champagne. My parents let me drink it when I was 4 for New Years.”

“That explains so much.” Kevin said under his breath as he chugged MY champagne as if it was a beer bong or something. When he was done he smiled and winked at me. Talk about smartasses!

Howie came outside shortly after our toast, looking a little drunk himself, “So, this is where you all disappeared to. The party is breaking up so you can stop hiding now.”

“We weren’t hiding. We all just needed some air.”

He looked at me, “Uh huh, well anyway…I’m heading to bed because we have a big day ahead of us tomorrow!”

I think he still might be mad at me, ah well, he’ll get over it. He always does.

I glanced at Brian who had made his way over the ledge. The sound of screaming fans was intoxicating. Just as he was about to look over, I gave him a small push. He actually screamed like a little girl and I couldn’t help but crack up!

“Brian dude, we need to seriously get you over your fear of heights. Think of all the fun we’d have like Bungee jumping and shit?”

He placed his hand on his heart, “How about I just watch you bungee jump?”

I shrugged, “Sounds good to me.”

With that being said we made our way back inside and off to bed where I didn’t sleep at all! Not even one wink!