Nick’s Point of View

When I woke up that morning, I found Emma was nowhere in the lounge room. I searched around the house for her, until I saw a figure sitting on the back deck. I went outside and there she was, just staring at the sunrise, a cup of tea beside her.

She couldn’t sleep, her eyes looked tired from lack of it. God she was beautiful, even at five in the morning after two hours of sleep. Her long brown hair all messy and the remainder of her makeup from work was smeared on her face, she had forgotten to remove it the night before.

When she got up from the ground to go home and freshen up, she kissed me on the cheek and then left. I felt my cheeks go bright red. Was I in love with the girl next door after one day?

That day I just lazed around home, playing Nintendo and filling out tour paperwork that was outstanding. I waited for Em to come back over, but she must have put her head down for a nap. I glanced at the clock at about three-thirty and decided to text her and see if she was okay because we had to head off to Brian’s. I went and changed into a pair of boardshorts and got an old black tour tee and went to the fridge and packed a carton of beer and vodka crusiers and put them in an esky. The door bell rang and there was Em out the front in her bikini top and a pair of green boardshorts. Wow, she looked sexy with a bare midriff.  I swear I could have taken her there.

“C-come in Em.”
“You ready to go?” she asked, still looking half asleep.

“Yeah, was just waiting for you. Let’s go.” I smiled.

I grabbed the esky and my car keys, wallet and phone and a few towels and Em and I went into the Garage and got into my Black BMW and drove to Brian’s house in Manhattan. We pulled up out the front of his very simple house that he shared with his wife of a year Leighanne Wallace. AJ, Kevin and Howie’s cars were all out the front; AJ and his convertible BMW, Kevin and his Four-Wheeled Drive and Howie and his simple silver Toyota. It certainly showed our different ways of spending. AJ was very elaborate, you should see his house it’s so full of stuff and quite expensive stuff. Kevin spent his money wisely and only brought the essentials and he had a four-wheel drive especially for when we were touring so we could fit in easily and have our suitcases fit in the back too rather than having a massive tour bus. Howie was very simple and knew the value of money and he had owned his Toyota for about four years and had no plan to buy a new one just for the sake of it. I was pretty elaborate with my cars; I had two, a black BMW and a black Prowler. I don’t really drive the Prowler unless I am going to a really special event and I don’t want to get a limo with the boys.

“Wow, you guys really like to live simply.” Em said impressed.

“We’re not as stuck up and excessive as people think, except AJ. He likes to spend his money more than save it.”

Brian answered the door, Leighanne by his side, both beaming proudly. Those two were the perfect match, soul mates. I wanted to find someone like Leighanne for myself. I was tired of being used. I don’t think people realise that I have feelings too. I think people think I’m just someone that they can walk all over and I have to admit, when I have had a bit to drink, I can be like that but in reality I’m a soft soul who just wants to be loved and in a deep and meaningful relationship.

“Hey Rok, hey Leighanne. This is Emma. Em, this is Leighanne and Brian.” I said, introducing them to Emma.

“It’s great to meet you Emma. Come on in.” Leighanne smiled.

“The others are out by the pool.” Brian replied.

Em looked at me with a nervous look on her face, she put out her hand for me to hold. I laced my fingers in hers and we walked out to the pool.

AJ and his fiancée were making out in the pool, Kevin and his wife were playing around splashing each other and Howie and his girlfriend Leigh were just sitting in the sun, tanning.

“Nick! Hey dude, who’s this?” Howie asked.

“Guys this is Emma, my neighbour. Emma this is Howie, Leigh, AJ, Amanda, Kevin and Kristin.”

AJ and Amanda stopped making out and turned to face us.

“Oh hey!” AJ said.

“Hey, I think I’ve seen you somewhere before.” Amanda said.

“Um, I’m the principal ballerina at the New York Ballet?”
“That’s where. Wow, your dancing is incredible.”
“Oh thanks. You’re a fan of Ballet?” she asked Amanda.

“I love the Ballet. I used to dance when I was a little girl but I hurt my knee when I was thirteen and had to stop.”
“Oh trust me, I’ve had my fair share of knee injuries over the years. I’ve been dancing since I was three. Today was the first day since I started dancing that I have taken a day off.”
“Wow, that’s dedication. Even when you had injuries?”
“Yeah, it was stupid but yeah.”
“Sorry, Em, do you want a drink?” I asked.

“What is there?”
“I have Crusiers.”
“Yeah can I have one please?”
“Sure” I replied. I went over to where I put the esky and got a Crusier out and gave it to Emma. I got myself a beer and went over at sat with Howie and Leigh. Emma sat on the edge of the pool talking to Amanda. AJ, looking defeated, got out of the pool and came over and sat with Howie, Leigh and I.

“She’s pretty Nick.” AJ said.

“Yeah she’s beautiful. She’s shyer than I remember though.”
“You mean you’ve been with her before?” AJ asked.

“No, we have been neighbours for about three years and we got really close at one point and I hadn’t told her I was in the band and she found out and chucked a spaz at me and wouldn’t talk to me for ages. We only really started talking yesterday.”
“Well you seem to have made a good impression.” Howie smiled. “ I think she might be the perfect girl you’ve been searching so hard for Nick.”

“I really hope so because she is so sweet and incredibly beautiful.”
“I guess today will be the best judge of character if she gets along with everyone well.” Howie replied.

Brian came over and sat down with us.

“What chu talking about peeps?”

“Seriously Brian?” we laughed.

“Hey, we have to keep up with the way the kids talk now if we want to sell more albums.”
“That is true.” Howie replied.

“But we have Alex so why bother?” I laughed, I was teasing AJ for being a child.

“Hey I’m more mature than you Nickolas.” AJ replied lightly punching my shoulder.

 After talking with the guys for a while, I looked back over at Emma who was still talking with Amanda, they were getting along so well. They were now in the pool, just talking. AJ looked at me and smiled, “Dude, our girls are getting along well.”
“Yeah very well, she’s not officially my girl yet though.”
“I bet by the end of tonight she will be.” Brian interrupted.

“And you’d know that Doctor Love.” Leighanne teased.

“Hey, I was right with you!” he smiled.

“That is true. Nick, listen to Brian.”

“Yay! I’m smart.” Brian said in a childish voice.

“Actually no, I take that back. Don’t listen to the child.” Leighanne replied then kissing Brian’s cheek.

Brian pretended to look sad. Man he was so funny sometimes. I guess that’s why he’s my best friend.

Emma got out of the pool about five minutes later when we were laughing about something and she came and sat in front of me.

“What are you guys laughing about?” she asked.

“Just tour stuff. Are you hungry?” I asked her. Kevin was over cooking the Barbeque with Howie.

“No, I’m fine.”
“Emma, if you’re hungry you can say. We’re not going to judge you for it.” Leighanne smiled at her.

“Okay yeah maybe a little.”
“Go over to Kevin and he’ll give you something.” AJ told her.

“I’ll come with you Em. Don’t worry.” I told her.

I got up then helped her up and we went over to where Kevin and Howie were cooking the Barbeque.

“Hey dudes, is anything ready yet?” I asked them
“Yeah, we have some pieces of steak ready…” Howie said, “And some sausages.”
“Um.. can I have a piece of steak please?” Emma asked handing Kevin her paper plate so he could put a small piece of steak on there for her.

“There’s some salad and fries inside too.” Howie smiled.

“Thanks Howie.” She replied, taking her plate inside to the kitchen to get some sides.

“Nick, she really suits you.” Kevin said

“Thanks Kev, I really like her.”
“I think it’s a bit obvious by the way you’re blushing dude and by the way your hands keep wanting to touch her waist. Such an obvious sign that you like a girl.” Brian called from over where the others were.

“BRIAN THOMAS LITTRELL, SHUT UP!” I shouted back at him.

Emma’s Point of View

“Nick, she really suits you.” Kevin said to Nick as I closed the screen door to the kitchen.

“Thanks Kev, I really like her.” I heard Nick reply
“I think it’s a bit obvious by the way you’re blushing dude and by the way your hands want to touch her waist, it’s such an obvious sign that you like a girl.” Brian called from over where the others were.

“BRIAN THOMAS LITTRELL, SHUT UP!”  Nick shouted back at him and the others laughed.

Naw Nick had a crush on me. I have to admit, as much as used to hate him, I thought he was absolutely adorable and he seemed to genuinely care about me this time; inviting me to Brian’s barbeque, letting me sleep over at his house, how he held my hand when I was too shy about meeting the others.

I smiled to myself, feeling my face go red. I stood beside the screen door, out of sight after getting my salad and fries and heard Nick talking to Howie and Kevin about me.

“Guys, do you reckon if I ask her out, she’ll say yes?”
“Well by what we’ve seen today, she seems to like you. So yeah, go for it.” Kevin said reassuringly, “Plus, I like her. She’s not fussy like all the other girls you’ve dated, she isn’t self conscious and she is extremely beautiful and she has a nice personality.”
“How should I ask her out? I’m not the best at that remember?”

“Just get her alone, kiss her and ask her out. Say Emma, will you be my girlfriend?”  Howie replied reassuringly. “She’d be crazy if she said no.”

I then walked out and past Nick, smiling at him. He blushed. I think he knows I heard what he said.

I went and sat with Amanda at the table where she was talking to Leighanne, Leigh and Kristin.

“So Em, you’ll have to get us season tickets so we can come and watch you dance.” Kristin suggested.

“I’ll see what I can do, but I would love it if you came to watch.”

“So, you and Nick…”
“What about Nick and I?” I asked with a smile.

“You two seem pretty close.” Leighanne hinted.

“He’s really sweet. I really like him but I doubt he’d go for someone like me.”
“Why not? You’re beautiful, talented, sweet and have personality to boot. Trust me you’re nothing like the playboy bimbos he has flirted with in the past.”  Amanda replied reassuringly

“You should ask him out, guys always like it when girls make the first mood. Have you had a boyfriend before?” Leighanne asked.

“Yeah, but a long time ago, when I was fifteen. He’s the male lead at the New York Ballet now, we’re like best friends. Us dating was a huge mistake so I have never trusted any guy since.”
“Why? What happened?” Kristin asked.

“I’ve never told anyone.” I sighed “Not even my brothers.”
“Look, we promise we won’t tell Nick or anyone else. This is between the girls. We BackStreet Women have to stick together.” Leighanne reassured “We can go inside and talk.”

I wasn’t exactly sure about telling people I had only just met, my deepest darkest secret. No one knew this secret but me. I was too scared to say anything, but for some reason, I felt like I could trust them. I have never been able to trust any girl ever and I think that is because of the nature of my career. The Ballet world is so bitchy and competitive and I try not to get involved. But this secret was bigger than my career and don’t get me wrong it has had a major impact on my personality. Like I said before, I am shy now, I used to be out there and energetic and loving life. But when this event happened, everything changed for me and the way I act around people.

“I’ll tell you, but can we go somewhere where the boys won’t be able to overhear? I don’t feel comfortable with Nick finding out just yet.” I replied.

“Of course, come on girls, let’s go. We’ll go into my study.” Leighanne suggested.

We walked past the boys and went inside and up to Leighanne’s office and we all sat on the couches that she had placed around the room. Leighanne shut the door and sat down next to me.

“So Em…”
“Okay so um.. when I was sixteen, I was with the most handsome and kind and the sweetest guy in my dance studio. We had known each other since we were three years old. Everyone had predicted we’d date and probably get married. My parents loved him, my brothers got along with him and I thought he was the most amazing guy ever. He is now the principal male at the New York Ballet. But when we were seventeen, things got rocky. We were both getting serious about our dancing and one night, we decided we’d let loose a little. So we went to a party that the actual Ballet Company was holding seeing as we were apprentices at the time. We had a bit too drink and we were sitting out in the backyard of the house the party was at and he started making a move. I didn’t want to go that far until I was about twenty. Anyway, he got me down and wouldn’t let me go. He was really starting to scare me. I called out but he had muffled the sound of my yells with his hand. And well I guess you can tell what happened after that. I felt so dirty afterwards. He made me swear to never tell anyone other wise I would pay for it and my dance career would be over. Now we have to dance with each other, every day. His hands are on my waist and every time he touches me, I just get flash backs of that night.” I replied with tears pouring down my face.
“Emma! That’s horrible. You shouldn’t let him get away with that. How could you have not told anyone about what he did until now?” Leighanne asked
“Because I couldn’t let my career go. But now I realise that there’s more important things in life than a career. Just please don’t tell Nick.” I replied still in tears
“We won’t say a word. We promise. Just please, please, if you ever need anyone to talk to, we’re all here.” Amanda replied.

“I promise.”

“And you need to seriously tell someone, you can’t be tortured by this guy forever. You really can’t. It’s not fair on you and your mental well-being.” Kirstin said,
“He keeps inviting me over to his house but I keep finding excuses not to go. I don’t know what’d happen if I did.”

“You need to report it, I know he threatened you. But you need to end this.” Leigh replied “We’ll even go with you to report it”
“But it happened three years ago.”
“You can still report it. It’s your word against his.” Leighanne reassured me.

There was a knock on the office door, “Girls, we’re getting in the pool. Do you want to join us?” the voice was Brian’s. I breathed a sigh of relief.

“We’ll be down in a minute Brian.” Leighanne replied.

“Okay baby. Is everything alright?”
“Yeah, just meet us downstairs.”

“How did your parents not find out?” Kirstin asked.

“They died about two months after. The whole incident happened after I had a massive fight with Nick when we first met.”
“Oh. Why didn’t you tell your brothers?”
“Cause David was one of their best friends. They wouldn’t believe it.”
“Well we’ll stand up for you. We’ll help you through this. You need support for something like this.” Amanda reassured.

“Come on, let’s go and have fun with the boys.” Leighanne smiled.

I have to admit; I felt a lot better now telling the girls about what happened between David and I. It’s not all roses. That’s why I’m not a great sleeper.

We went downstairs and we all got into the pool and over to our respective guy. Nick was having a beer and talking to Brian.

“Were you girls okay? Em, why is your face red? Were you crying?” Nick asked.
“It… it doesn’t matter.”
“Yeah it does, was it something I did?” he asked worried.

“No, its not. It just doesn’t matter okay? I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay baby”

As the night got later, we retreated inside to the lounge room to watch movies together. Brian and Leighanne had fallen asleep on a mattress on the floor, AJ and Amanda had to leave at about eight o’clock because Amanda had work in the morning, Leigh and Howie were sitting watching the movie, cuddling and Kevin and Kirsten were asleep in the guest room by nine o’clock. Nick and I were just sitting there with his arm around me. I was getting a bit cold and my bag was outside by the pool so I got up and went to walk outside. Nick followed me.

“Are you alright? Do you like the guys?”
“Yeah they’re awesome people. The girls are awesome. They’re so easy to get along with.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you get along with them. You know, if you’re cold, you can have my tour hoodie?” he replied taking off the black hoodie he had on.

“No nick, it’s fine sweetheart. I have a jumper.”

He put his arms around my waist and pulled me closer. His face leaned closer to me and our lips connected. I felt a spark. A hand left my waist and one of Nick’s fingers gently caressed my face as we kissed.

I pulled away smiling.

“Emma, will you go out with me? I really like you and I’d like to take this further.”
“Nick, I’d love to be your girlfriend.”
“Really?”
“Yes really silly”

“Okay good.” He smiled with a cheesy grin. “Emma, I promise I will take care of you. No matter what.”
“Naww Nick.”
“No, I mean it. I want this to last.”

“I think you are incredibly adorable.” I replied, kissing his cheek.

I turned around and saw Leigh standing at the screen door giving me the thumbs up.

“You’ll be there for everything?” I asked.

“Every single thing baby.” He replied before he kissed me again.

Now I had to work out, how, just how, I was going to tell Nick about the whole David situation without causing a war or getting myself hurt again. I needed to end this thing with David. In that moment with Nick it felt like nothing mattered. I wanted to feel like that all the time but the rape was always in the back of my mind. I wanted to be normal and not have to worry and be paranoid about a man raping me every day. I wanted to let Nick in, but it was just something I was beginning to learn. I needed time to learn, so I thought, now is my time to just be a little girl again. Fall in love, feel like a princess and never let him go. But the chains… the chains are going to stay on the shackles until I tell Nick and the police. But now wasn’t the right time.