The events that unfolded at breakfast that Friday set off a whirlwind of activity. We spent the day over at Paige and Bradley’s and the girls took an immediate liking to Natalie. She was a year younger, but that didn’t stop the three of them from playing together in the Reid’s big backyard and dressing up in boas and tutus and tiaras to have a tea party. They forgot about the playground and seeing the smiles and hearing their laughter gave me a sense that I was starting this dad thing out the right way.

My in-laws came over for lunch and my daughters were delighted to refer to them as Nona and Gumpy instead of Miss Lorraine and Mr. Spencer. I saw tears in my mother-in-law’s eyes when she heard the girls call her that. I could see a definite bond forming between them and knew they both would treat Ashlyn and Ireland like they were their own flesh and blood. It made me feel so warm inside to know my girls were surrounded by so much love.

Friday evening, after the girls were bathed and ready for bed, we placed the call to my mom. I settled all three of us on the couch in the family room and put her on speakerphone, listening as the phone rang on her end.

She picked up on the second ring and before I could even respond to her greeting, the girls were talking over themselves trying to talk to her and invite her out and tell her what they could call her. It was confusion and I could only laugh and imagine what my mother must be thinking.

“Al- Wh- Are-” she tried to voice over the girls, but each time was cut off.

Finally, I wrapped an arm around each child and covered their mouths in a cute gesture. “Okay, girls, you have to let daddy and Gigi talk now. Then you can say hello.”

Ashlyn giggled behind my hand then pulled it from her mouth. “Hi hi, Gigi.”

“Gigi?” My mother sounded confused. “Am…am I,” a pause, “Gigi?” She gasped some. “Is this Ashlyn and Ireland?”

And then Ireland was pulling my hand away and they were talking over themselves once more trying to talk to their grandmother. I could only laugh and listen to the chatter.

“And then we was having a tea party!”

“And we has a Nona and a Gumpy!”

“And you’re our Gigi, but you don’t have a Skipper.”

“And Natalie is our cousin! Do you have a cousin?”

“I can’t wait to tell Charlie I has a Gigi too!”

“Daddy, can we call Charlie next?”

“Hey, can we talk to Papa?”

“Where is Flor’da? Daddy says that’s where you live.”

I could hear my own mother’s laughter as she tried to discern what they were talking about. I’m sure she was as confused as ever, but probably didn’t care one bit. She was listening to the precious melodic voices of her grandbabies and I had a feeling she’d listen to them talk about anything.

Finally, there was a slight pause and I took advantage, jumping into the conversation, “Hello, Mom.”

“Alex.” My mom laughed. “This…I….this… this is wonderful!”

I smiled and hugged the girls to my sides. “I think so too. And if they would take turns, they could introduce themselves and each get to talk to you.” I sent them both a look telling them that’s what I wished they’d do.

“Gosh, I can’t believe it’s really them,” I could hear the tears of joy in her voice. “Hello, Ashlyn. Hello, Ireland. I’m,” she paused and chuckled, “well, I’m Gigi, I guess.”

“I hope you don’t mind. They have a friend who calls his grandmother, Gigi. And…they wanted to call you Gigi.” I snuggled my daughters as they squirmed some.

“Not at all. Oh gosh, I’m so honored to be Gigi.”

“Charlie calls his grandpa, Skipper. But we’re gonna call him Papa, okay?” Ashlyn voiced, deciding she had been quiet long enough.

My mom laughed. “Oh, he is going to love being called Papa.”

My oldest giggled and pressed her cheek against my side.

I smiled and took advantage of the pause in conversation once more. “Mom, the girls and I were wondering if you and Papa wanted to come out and visit us.”

I just knew she had to be smiling from ear to ear. “Oh, I would love to come out and visit. I can’t wait to meet you girls.”

Ireland giggled. “We never had a Gigi before.”

“Well, I’ve never had grandchildren before. I’m so glad to be your Gigi.”

“You’ll have to come soon, Mom,” I added. “We can get you a ticket tonight.”

“Well, let me talk to Tony. He’s going to want to come too and we’ll have to figure a time around his schedule. But I could always fly out a few days before he does.”

“That’s right; you’re not glued at the hip.”

She chuckled. “I can’t wait to see all of you. So, Ashlyn and Ireland, what kind of stuff do you like to do?”

“We like tea parties!” Ashlyn exclaimed. “And dressing up all pretty.”

“And playin’ at the playground!” Ireland added.

Ashlyn’s curls bobbed as she nodded her head. “Right; the slide is my fav’ritest ever!”

“I like the see-saw.”

“And the merry-go-round.”

“Oh yeah! And the swings! We can go really high!”

“When ya come to see us, can you take us to the playground?”

“Daddy took us to the playground one time.”

I couldn’t contain my laughter as my mother (and I) tried to keep up with their conversation. Neither of us could get a word in edgewise and I finally had to cover their mouths again to quiet them for a moment.

“Okay, ladies,” I spoke after cutting them off mid-sentence. “What if we talked to Gigi one at a time? That way she can answer your questions back.”

My mother’s chuckle came over the line. “They’re just fine, Alex. I’m really enjoying myself.”

Ashlyn pulled my hand away from her mouth. “Gigi, today we played with our cousin, Natalie. When you come see us I’ll take you to meet her. Okay?”

My mom chuckled again. “I would love to meet your cousin, Natalie.” Unbeknown to either girl, she already knew Natalie, but why spoil the fun?

“We had a tea party in her backyard.” Ireland had removed my hand as well.

“Gosh, that sounds like so much fun. Do I get to join you for a tea party?”

Ashlyn nodded her head with a force that sent her curls swaying. “Yeah! And we’ll make strawberry cinnamon tea.”

“With Ashlyn’s secret ingre’dants,” Ireland added.

“Ooh, you have secret ingredients for your tea?”

The older of the two giggled and covered her mouth before speaking, “Yeah, but I can’t tell you, cuz it’s a secret.”

Ireland wiggled her legs on the couch. “She won’t even tell me!”

My mom laughed. “Well, it wouldn’t be secret ingredients anymore if she told everyone.”

“Yeah!” Ashlyn agreed with enthusiasm.

Ireland gave a pout and I chuckled then kissed the top of her head. “Okay girls,” I spoke as Eve slipped into the room. “Let’s tell Gigi night night. It’s pretty late and I’m sure she needs to go to bed.”

My mother chuckled and Ashlyn’s eyes widened. “Oh, is it past your bedtime? You bettah go to bed.”

“It sure is past my bedtime. You ladies have sweet dreams okay? And I will see you in a few days.”

Ireland giggled and slipped into my lap. “Okay, don’t forget to come see us.”

“Oh, sweetheart, I could never do that,” she responded.

Ashlyn blew kisses at the phone. “Night night, Gigi.”

If my mother could have seen that I know she would be in tears. I reached and smoothed a hand over Ashlyn’s head. “Goodnight, Mom, I’ll call you in a bit.”

“Niiiight!” Ireland called out.

My mom chuckled and when she spoke, I could hear the emotion in her voice, “Goodnight, sweetheart and goodnight my sweet and wonderful grandbabies.”

With a smile on my own face, I reached over and lifted the receiver then set it back down and just like that, she was gone. Sitting back again, I looked between them. “That was pretty neat, huh?”

Ashlyn giggled and gave a nod as her sister stifled a yawn. “Yeah!” She enthused. “I can’t wait ta see her.”

“Me either,” Ireland replied with sleep laced in her voice.

I kissed both their heads. “I can’t wait to see her either.”

Ashlyn clambered over into my lap as well. “Is it time for us to go to night night too?”

I shifted them so they both fit comfortably and hugged them close. “I think so. You’ve had a pretty busy day and I’m sure you both must be exhausted.”

“Not really.” My oldest shook her head, but despite that her eyelids were heavier than normal.

I shared a look with my wife then lifted them into my arms and rose from the couch. “Well, how about we go upstairs and read a book and then settle in for the night?”

She gave a nod as if telling me that were okay and then settled her head against my shoulder.

Glancing over toward Eve, I motioned for her to join us and then together, the four of us headed up the stairs.

~*~*~*~*~

It was the middle of the night and I wasn’t sure what had woken me. But I lay there in the dark staring up at the ceiling and straining my ears for any type of sound that shouldn’t belong. Nothing came, but I had the strongest feeling that I needed to get out of bed and go downstairs.

Glancing over to where Eve lay, I found her asleep and tucked beneath the blankets. She looked like a peaceful angel and I smiled softly; my peaceful angel. I was a lucky bastard, that’s for sure.

Slowly pushing the covers from me, I slipped from the bed as quietly as I could so I wouldn’t disturb her. She didn’t move and I didn’t have to worry about remembering to put on my pants since I would be sleeping with them on from here on out.

I did grab up a tshirt and pulled it on as I headed for the bedroom door and out into the hall. Something caught my eye though and I did a quick backward step back into the bedroom. There on the wall we had mounted one of the control panels for the security system and at the moment a tiny red light was flashing to indicate that someone had set it off either by opening a door or window (or breaking through either).

Immediately my heart was in my throat. Trying to keep the thoughts of a crazed maniac breaking into my home at bay, I moved to the bed and roused my wife as gently and hurried as I could.

She woke with a start. “What’s wrong?”

“The alarm-” but I didn’t get to finish because the phone on the nightstand gave a sharp shrill, cutting through the silence of the night. With a jerk, I grabbed it up. “Hello?”

The man on the other end identified himself as one of the agents monitoring the systems of the alarm company I had our security alarm through. After verifying that I was indeed the homeowner, he said that he’d gotten a signal from this address that our system had gone off due to one of the zone alarms being tripped. However, there had been no indications of any further zones being activated and he was just calling to check and make sure things were okay before alerting the police.

In a hurry, I sent Eve off to check on the girls and asked the man, who’d identified himself as William, what zone it was that had been set off. His reply was the front door and I was out of the room and halfway down the stairs when Eve’s cry that Ashlyn wasn’t in the bed reached my ears.

Usually the alarm had motion sensors that would detect the movements in each room, but when I was home, we only used the alarm that would signal if a door or window was opened or broken. And with Ashlyn not being in her room, I was pretty sure that she’d been the one to set the alarm off.

Telling the man it was probably my daughter; I put him on hold and reached the foyer to see the front door standing wide open. My heart was once again in my throat at the thought of Ashlyn just up and getting out of the house, though knowing the property was completely surrounded with fencing and gates at the drive, I knew she wouldn’t get very far.

Flicking the front lights on, I stepped outside and scanned the yard, seeing no sign of her. Heading down off the porch, I jogged toward the driveway, calling her name out and my voice exploded through the quiet night like a gunshot in the dark.

“Daddy?”

Her voice came from the left and I turned to see her sitting in one of Eve’s flowerbeds. She had a bouquet of various flowers clutched tightly in one hand and tear stains on her cheeks that glistened in the lights from the porch.

Now my heart was in my toes and I dropped to my knees there by her. “Ashlyn, what’s wrong?” Tears were threatening to mist up my eyes, but I forced them back. “What are you doing outside?”

“Mommy needs flowers,” came her teary response and she turned and yanked more flowers from the soft dirt.

Eve prided herself in her flowers and usually spent an entire Saturday out tending to them and pruning and watering and making sure they grew just right. I knew that she would be upset to see the bed destroyed, but I hoped it wouldn’t make her angry. Something was very wrong here and we needed to focus our attention on the sweet little four-year-old wearing a nightgown smeared with dirt sitting amongst the flowers.

My heart was breaking inside as I saw her body tremble and heard her sniffles. I wanted to reach and pull her into my arms, but wasn’t sure if it was the right move to make. “Did you have a bad dream?” I questioned softly, wondering if that spurred her need to come outside in the dead of night to pick flowers.

Ashlyn shook her head and continued her task at hand.

Movement from my left caught my eye and I looked to see my wife there on the walkway, an uncertain expression on her face. Shaking my head slightly at her, I held the phone, which I had muted, in her direction. “Will you tell William that everything is fine and thank him for calling?”

She wordlessly took the phone then turned and headed back for the front door.

Once she was gone, my gaze fell back on my daughter whose bouquet was getting bigger and bigger. Well, at least Eve would have a new project; Operation Restore Flower Bed. Rubbing my tired eyes, I tried to figure my best approach. Nothing came, so I shrugged at myself and asked the obvious, “Why are you picking flowers for your mommy?”

She didn’t respond and I could see her brows furrowing in the dim light that surrounded us. If my mother were here she would say that she was definitely her father’s daughter. “Sweetheart?” I reached and touched her arm.

“No!” She shrieked loudly, jerking away from me and scrambling to a safe spot.

I jerked back myself at her outburst.

After a moment of stunned silence, I tried again, “Ashlyn, honey, tell Daddy what’s wrong.”

But there was no response and so we sat there both lost, but in two very different aspects. Me, I was lost in what to say or do to help my baby girl and she, well she was lost in her task of making the largest bouquet known to man for her deceased mother.

I watched as she meticulously worked on her bouquet, acting as if I wasn’t even sitting two feet away. Her face was one of determination and every other minute she’d sniff or wipe at her eyes with her forearm, streaking dirt on her nightgown and across her face. It tore me in two and I had never felt more helpless. Not even at the lowest point of my life when I was wrapped up in drugs and alcohol did I feel this lost. This was my daughter, my flesh and blood and she was hurting a hurt bigger than her little body could contain and there didn’t seem to be a thing I could to about it.

Who knows how long we sat there; a minute…ten….twenty…an hour, time was lost to me. But Eve reappeared and knelt down next to me, touching my elbow to get my attention.

“Go inside,” she said in a hushed tone.

Without any protest, and not knowing why, I obliged. I rose from my spot, my knees aching from having been on them for so long, then strode tired and weary to the front door and up into the house.

Ireland was at the bottom of the stairs. Her arms wrapped around the banister, leaning against it for support. “Daddy…” she spoke timidly upon seeing me.

“C’mere, munchkin’.” I opened my arms and she ran right into them. Lifting her off the ground, I hugged her close and closed my eyes, relishing in the feel of her little arms wrapped tight around my neck. “You okay?” I questioned as I breathed in her strawberry shampoo and peeked to her sweet little face.

“What’s wrong with Ashlyn?”

I smoothed a hand over her back and headed for the living room. “I think she’s very sad about your mommy going to be with Jesus.”

“Oh.” She was quiet for a moment and I sat us down into a black, leather lazy boy type chair. “I’m pretty sad too.”

“I know you are.” I kissed her head and snuggled her close. “It’s a very sad thing.”

“It’s the saddest thing ever.” And then she was pressing her face into my chest and I could feel her hot tears wetting my shirt.

Tears filled my own eyes at that and I just held her close. There are no words to comfort someone at a time like this and so you just have to let them cry and hold them and show them that you’re there.

We sat there rocking together until Ireland’s tears subsided enough and she peeked to me, requesting another ‘lul’by’.

I kissed her head and wiped her tears with my hand then snuggled her close and began to sing the same one from last night.

Eve came in with Ashlyn while I was on the last verse. Ashlyn was clutching a bouquet so big she had to hold it with both hands and her pink nightgown was just covered with dirt, her cheeks (and hands) smeared with it as well.

Watching them both as Eve stood in the doorway holding the preschooler, I let the last note fade away and then fell into silence. My wife had tears glistening in her eyes and it was on the tip of my tongue to ask what happened, but I knew now wasn’t the time for it.

Though Ireland had no qualms about voicing anything. “Ashlyn, what did you do? You have dirt all over!”

Her sister just turned her somber brown eyes toward the younger brunette and held out the flowers. “For Mommy,” her voice was hoarse from her tears and I could detect a tremor in it.

Ireland looked confused. “Mommy isn’t here.”

Ashlyn’s eyes flashed. “I know! But Eve said we can put ‘em in water an’ she’ll see ‘em from Heaven.”

I smiled at that and shared a look with Eve. I had a pretty smart wife. “That is a wonderful idea, Ashlyn.”

She eyed me shyly then hugged the flowers to her chest. “I’ma keep ‘em in my room. Maybe Mommy will wanna come and smell ‘em.”

That broke my heart all over again and I gently covered Ireland’s mouth before she could tell her sister yet again that their mommy wasn’t going to ever come back cuz of her important job.

Ireland seemed to understand and sagged into me. “Daddy, will you sing another lul’by?”

Ashlyn leaned into Eve and I could see the dirt smudges on my wife’s tank top, though she didn’t seem to care. It was then that I noticed the knees of her pajama pants were caked with dirt.

Tearing my eyes away from that, I focused on Ireland. “Um well … your daddy needs to learn a few more lullabies I do think.”

My eldest daughter lifted her head from Eve’s shoulder. “Do you know … Long As You Love Me?”

I blinked. “As Long As You Love Me?”

Her soft curls bobbed as she nodded her head. “Yeah, by The Backstreet Boys. We love their songs.”

I chuckled softly and looked to my wife who looked as surprised as I felt. “How do you two know about The Backstreet Boys?”

“Cuz Mommy would let us listen to their CD’s,” Ireland piped up. “We used ta sing and dance and clean the house.”

Well how ‘bout that. Though it did make sense considering Melody had been a fan and her daughters’ father was one. Of course she would have wanted to introduce them to the music if even so they could unknowingly hear their father sing. That made me smile and I hugged Ireland a little closer then slipped her to one leg. “I definitely know that song. Ashlyn, do you want to come sit with us while I sing it?”

Ashlyn eyed me carefully. “Can I keep the flowers?”

I nodded and Eve deposited her, dirt and all, into my lap. Thanking my wife, I situated them both, not caring that my own pajama pants were soon smeared with dirt. “Alright, As Long As You Love Me.” And then I began to hum the tune a few bars before leaning my head back against the chair and letting the words spill out so flawlessly,

“Although loneliness has always been a friend of mine,
I'm leavin' my life in your hands.
People say I'm crazy and that I am blind,
Risking it all in a glance.
And how you got me blind is still a mystery,
I can't get you out of my head.
Don't care what is written in your history,
As long as you're here with me.

I don't care who you are,
Where you're from,
What you did,
As long as you love me.
Who you are,
Where you're from,
Don't care what you did,
As long as you love me.”

I watched the girls as I sang, sending them a wink which made them both giggle some. By the time I hit the chorus, Ireland was singing along softly with me and Melody had been right; she did have a beautiful voice.

“Every little thing that you have said and done,
Feels like it's deep within me. Ooh ooh ooh.
Doesn't really matter if you're on the run,
It seems like we're meant to be.

I don't care who you are,
Where you're from,
What you did,
As long as you love me.
Who you are,
Where you're from,
Don't care what you did,
As long as you love me. Yeah eh eh.
As long as you love me.”

By now, they both were singing and a little stronger and more sure of the words. Glancing around for Eve, I spied her standing in the doorway filming us with the video camera. She smirked as I noticed her and I stuck my tongue out her way then turned my attention back to my daughters and the song they seemed to love.

“I've tried to hide it so that no one knows,
But I guess it shows
When you look into my eyes.
What you did and where you're comin’ from,
I don't caaare, as long as you love me, baby.

I don’t care who you are,
Where you’re from,
What you did,
As long as you love me.
Who you are,
Where you’re from,
Don’t care what you did, yeah eh eh
As long as you love me.

Who you are,
Where you’re from,
As long as you love me.
What you did,
I don’t care,
As long as you love me.”

The three of us ended with a gusto and Ireland flung her arms wide. With a chuckle, I kissed her head then Ashlyn’s. “I do believe we have some singers in this house.”

“You girls were wonderful,” Eve enthused after stopping the video and setting it aside to clap for us.

Ireland giggled. “That’s our most fav’rite song.”

Her sister nodded her head. “Yeah, Mommy would sing it to us at nighttime.”

That made me smile and I hugged them close again. “Well, that was a wonderful thing for your mommy to do.”

Ireland nodded her head some then gave a yawn and rubbed her eyes. “I’m pretty tired still.”

“Well, you silly gooses, it’s the middle of the night.” My wife joined us then reached and lifted Ashlyn into her arms. “How ‘bout, let’s go upstairs and we’ll get Ashlyn all cleaned up then tuck you both back into bed.”

My daughter nodded her head like she liked that idea and I rose to my feet with her. Together, the four of us headed up the stairs with Ashlyn’s behavior still weighing heavily on my heart and mind. Eve and I were going to have to have a discussion later so she could tell me what transpired outside after I left and then we would get Ashlyn (and Ireland) immediately into some kind of therapy. I think all of us needed that.