He rose and sat on the opposite edge of the bed. About as far away as he could get from me. How had she managed to put this distance between us? He wanted me to come home right? Or did he just want that cushy place to snuggle up with again? He said we could do this. Be strong together but five minutes in bed with me and he was already wanting to fuck her. How did I know? He wasn't touching me the way he touched ME when made love and secondly, he wouldn't face me. Sure I had plenty of remorse for what I'd done but now it was like he was cheating on me with my own body.
“Never mind. I have an early call and I'm beat,”he lied.
“That's not it and you fucking know it!” I lashed out. I was never one to curse much but push the wrong button and you don't want to know me.
He turned his head slowly and and looked at me disbelievingly.” Don't you get mad at me!”
“Oh, you're right. I shouldn't be pissed off that you'd rather be fucking another woman instead of making love to me! The woman in your bed!”
“You're the one that brought her into this damned bed!” He shot back as he stood and faced me.
“And I'm fucking sorry everyday that I did but don't tell me I shouldn't be angry because the man I love is using my body to satisfy his urges for another woman!” I stood there on the opposite side of the bed half naked.
“It's not like you never thought about her when we were. Hell! For all I know, you've been thinking it every time we've made love in the last three months!”
My eyes widened. I couldn't believe he hit so low. I couldn't blame him for it but neither of us had even ventured to mention her name. Without so much as another word, I turned away and headed for the dresser. I was not sharing that bed with him tonight. No way in hell. He hit that trigger. I pulled the dresser drawer open and laying on top of everything was that damned piece of lingerie. I pulled it out and tried to rip it to pieces when I felt his arms come around me. Confining me His voice attempting to soothe my fury.
“I am so sorry baby. I didn't mean what I said.”
“Please get me go!” I cried. He was the victim and here he was trying to make me feel better. I'd let her in. I'd caused this and for some odd reason he thought we could work through this. I wanted to believe that we were going to make it but she just kept deepening the rift between us. He wasn't listening to me as he rocked my body side to side in an effort to settle me down.
“Listen to me,”he replied calmly.” I am so sorry for what I did to you. I can't keep letting her win. WE can't keep letting her win.”
My body was trembling as the material dropped from my hands onto the dresser. I clutched his arms and completely broke down.”Why do you still love me? Why? After everything I've put you through.”
Turning me around to face him, I saw it. This wasn't easy on either of us. She'd manipulated us into believing there was no other way in the world except hers. I mean if she could toy with him and get into his brain, she'd brainwashed me. I needed help. I knew I did but I didn't want to air our dirty laundry to a professional. You never know who's out there to make a quick buck when you share your life with a celebrity. All I had was Sharon. Nearby. I had Jon forever but he was so far away most the time that I didn't want to burden him anymore than I already had.
“Meg, I've been in love with you since the day I met you. I don't know why or how it happened, I just know that if anything happens to separate us again, I'll die. I don't want Roxy to be the end of us. You've gotta believe me baby.”
There it was. One of us finally said her name. The biggest issue in our life. I should have known the day I met her she was trouble but as we've established, I try to find the good in everybody. She never showed me any bad until recently. I never saw the depraved sexual part of her life. She teased me about not being more open to it and I just brushed it off. What she did sexually was her business. Now she'd made it mine.“I do. I just don't understand why you're not more angry with me. I cheated on you.”
“I know but I cheated on you.”
“Only because of me. I've been with you long enough to know that other women turn your head but not to the point of actually committing the act.”
DONNIE
I knew she was carrying a major load of guilt on her shoulders but should I tell her that her so called friend made a pass that had me thinking twice about actually going there? Again, we were going to have to be honest if we were going to beat her at her own game. Through all this, I'd never stopped loving Meg. Ever. Couples fight but not like this and I wanted to get back to that place where we were in love. Where there was no Roxy. Where there would never be another Roxy.. I wanted to put a ring on Meg's finger for crying out loud. Now it was my turn to feel guilty. I'd got her home but just a smidge under false pretenses. I figured once I got her home that we could work through this. Break down the walls that had been built between us. The ones she'd been putting up because of all that guilt.”Meg.”I released my embrace around her and took her hand; leading her to the bed. Once we sat, I continued.” Today Roxy came to visit me on the set.”
“You told me that.”
“What I didn't tell you is that I actually thought about taking her up on her offer not knowing what had happened with you. Is that something you really would have considered?” I didn't want to ask that but I thought it was necessary for us to get past all the sexual stuff. We were so much more than that.
“Seriously?”She wiped away the tears and looked at me like I was out of my mind.
I didn't know what to say. Now I was feeling guilty. I'd turned my head and I felt her hand pull my gaze back to hers.
“I'm not mad, I just thought you knew me better than that.”
“I thought I did too.”She knew what I was talking about.
“I love you and there's no excuse for what I did but we are stronger than her. It's because we have each other. I'm not going to let her bully us. I t took forever for you to come back into my life, she's gonna have to do a hell of a lot more than what she's done to destroy what we've got.”
I knew we were both battling the force of nature called Roxy but with each other to lean on, we were going to make it. I had to believe it.”
Author's Chapter Notes:
I'm back! It's Tuesday! Enjoy!
