Brian felt exhausted after the concert. Thankfully, adrenaline kept him moving on stage but now that the performance was over he was crashing fast.   He kissed his son’s forehead while he slept and found his way back to his bed.  Falling down he kicked his shoes off on the floor and lay on top of the covers fully clothed.  He didn’t even have the energy to crawl under the covers.  It wasn’t long before his eyes were closed. 

When he opened his eyes again he couldn’t move.  He felt strapped down.  He tried to get up but was unable to move.  He looked across from him and the woman, the fan, was strapped to a metal table adjusted so it faced him.  He could only assume he was strapped down in a similar fashion.  He continued to fight against his restraints.  Another man walked into the room and approached the woman.  Brian could see the needle in his hand.  He wanted to scream out to warn the woman, but what good would it do? They were trapped.  

Brian cringed as the needle entered her neck.  Tears welled in his eyes as he watched her mouth something that he was unable to hear then her eyes glazed over and look at him like she’d never met him before.   

Through his tears he saw a black van pull up with Kevin getting out.  He felt panicked as Kevin grabbed him and started to pull him towards the van.  Brian fought against his hands.  He tried to pull free, he wanted to get back to the woman but Kevin was stronger and managed to get him back into the van.   He sat up much faster this time and started to look around, still stunned to see space and stars out the window.  He reached for the door again but before he could pull the door open he felt himself falling. 

The fall was over quickly and he stood, brushing himself off.  The sun was blinding him and soon his eyesight adjusted.  He was back in the park.  He noticed the picnic blanket spread out again and the woman was there smiling.  He felt a sense of relief and started to walk towards her but before he could reach her he noticed another man kneeling across from her.  The man looked familiar but he couldn’t make him out, he was holding a ring out to her.  He was proposing.  Brian had never felt so jealous in his life, he could only watch in horror as the woman said ‘yes’ and hugged the stranger. 

A scream from behind him pulled him out of the anger he was feeling at the woman for accepting.  He turned in the direction the scream came from and saw Leighanne lying on a hospital bed.  Her face was sweaty and she was straining.  She reached out her hand to him and he quickly went to her side holding her hand tightly and brushing the hair off of her forehead. 

Another cry from the room had Brian smiling and both of them crying.  He kissed her and moved to look at his son, Baylee.  He took the small form in his arms and moved closer to Leighanne so she could get a look at him too. 

“He’s perfect,” She murmured and kissed his head.  Brian smiled and looked down at his son.  He almost dropped the small form when instead of his son he was looking down at Marvin the Martian wrapped tightly in the hospital blanket. 

He didn’t jolt out of sleep this time but he felt sweaty and as if he really had been crying as he lay in the bed trying to go back to sleep.  He hoped that he wouldn’t wake Leighanne; she didn’t need any reason to worry about him further.  It took him a few minutes to realize that sun was creeping into the room and that he could hear voices outside the room. 

“I’m starting to get really worried about him,” Howie’s voice chimed in.  “Leighanne said he called out for you to let him go several times last night.”

“I wonder what that’s all about.” Kevin’s voice replied. 

“Do you think we should stop the tour? He might need help that we can’t provide on tour.”  Howie added. 

“Hey guys,” Brian interrupted standing at the door.  Howie and Kevin sat at the table looking at him uneasily as he walked in the room.  “Where are Baylee and Leighanne?”  He wanted, no he needed, to see them after the dream he had.  He wanted to hold Leighanne close and kiss Baylee.  The dreams were starting to make him feel like a cheater.  He wanted to reaffirm his love for his family. 

“Kristen took them out.  I think there were a few shops they were going to look at then they were going to get some ice cream for Baylee.”  Kevin smiled up at his cousin.    

Brian nodded, he was sure Leighanne needed a friendly ear to discuss what was going on with him.  He knew that she was worried about him after the last few days and Kristen was her closest friend on tour.  “Hey, I know you two just want to help me, but can I be alone?”

Howie and Kevin looked at each other, exchanging worried glances before they nodded in agreement and left the bus.   Brian watched the two of them walk away through the window before he pulled out his cell phone and punched in the familiar number.

“Pastor Mike?” Brian asked as the other person answered.

“Yes, what can I do for you?” The Pastor replied.

“I have been having feelings of being unfaithful to my wife.”

“Oh?” came the reply on the other end.  Brian and Pastor Mike had a long standing friendship.  He had been there through his heart problems, he was the one who married him and Leighanne and oversaw the baptism of Baylee.   He was like a father to him since the tragedy that had taken his parents and brother away from him several years before joining with The Backstreet Boys. 

Brian delved into his explanation of the dreams about the other woman, about proposing to her and the strong connection he felt towards her during the dreams.  

“Brian, dreaming about another woman does not make you unfaithful.  Dreams are messages sent to us from our Lord.  You should write down what you remember in a notebook.  If you are comfortable, share these with your wife and both of you can work out what their possible meaning could be.  Perhaps you feel something is missing from your marriage and your mind is focusing on this woman as a way to wake you up to something you need to correct.” 

Brian nodded as the man spoke.  Mike always knew what to say to help him.  “I will thank you for your advice.” 

“Brian, please call me if you feel you need to discuss this any further.” 

Brian told him he would and hung up the phone.  He started to search for a spare notebook and pen; he wanted to write down the most recent dream before he had a chance to forget what it was about. 

“Brian,” Howie’s voice came from the doorway.  “Hey, I apologize but I overheard some of your conversation.  I thought I left my phone here and was coming back to look for it.  I didn’t mean to snoop.” 

“Don’t worry about it D.” Brian smiled at his friend.

“I can help you put your mind at ease about this entire thing. I can help stop the dreams.” Howie started calmly.

“Thanks, but if they are truly a message from God I need to let them work themselves out so I can figure out what the message is trying to tell me.”

“It’s not really your choice,” Howie said as he moved in closer to Brian.  Brian looked down and noticed a syringe in his hand.

“Howie, what are you doing?” He asked him moving back away from the person he thought was a friend.  Howie moved closer to Brian and reached out to grab hold of his arms.  With nowhere to really get away from him on the bus, Howie soon had a hold of one of Brian’s wrists and moved to inject the needle into Brian’s arm.

Before Brian could really tell what was happening, he kicked his leg out and knocked the syringe out of his hand.  Howie released his wrist and with two arms free he blocked the punches Howie threw his way.    Realizing the punches were going nowhere, Howie grabbed for Brian’s clothing and started tossing him around the bus, slamming him against the bunks and the table. 

Managing to push him off, Brian surprised himself by pulling off a spin kick that knocked Howie against the window of the bus.   Howie recovered and charged at him again but the kick came again and this time the force was so strong that Howie flew through the plexi glass window and fell on the pavement outside of the bus.

“Shit,” Brian cursed so rarely that the word escaping his mouth startled him.  He rushed quickly outside to Howie’s side.  The blood was pooling around him turning the pavement red.  “What did I do?”  He reached down and gently pressed his fingers at his neck the way he’d seen doctors and paramedics check for a pulse.  Nothing. 

“No, no…” He muttered to himself looking around to see if anyone had seen what happened, if anyone around had seen him kill his friend and band mate, Howie. 

He suddenly knew he couldn’t be there anymore. Without taking anything, without telling anyone, he took off in the opposite direction of the arena he was supposed to perform in that night.