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The walk of shame.

Yes, I had my very first walk of shame.

I opened my cabin door and to my surprise, Judy was in her bed. Shit.

«H-hey Jude…you huh, are back early?!» I asked, ashamed.

«Actually I came back around 4. He told me the beach party would be brutal, so he called it a night earlier than expected. What’s YOUR story? 20$ it’s AJ»

Right. When she left, (or when I left) I was still talking with Aj. Could I tell her about my night? It would imply telling her about last year as well, and I didn’t want to. So the answer was NO. She had spent the last 12 months talking about Nick’s many hook ups. How did she know? Her ‘guy’ kept her informed. I had to think, and fast!

«My story? What do you mean?»

«It’s 7:33 am and you are dressed as an 80’s whore» she said, looking at the alarm clock.

«Honestly? Huh, I have nothing. I went for a coffee around 5am and started talking with a bunch of drunken fans. We chatted and it was pretty cool actually. I left because 3 of them fell asleep right there in front of me on the table». Ok, so I lied.

«You expect me to believe that Hann?»

«I would hope so, why would I lie to you? Besides, there were fans in the corridor in front of our door, I couldn’t walk in.»

«Huh why?» Judy asked

«Why? Did you notice that we’re the ONLY ones without decorations on our door? Fans were gathered in front of our cabin, wondering why. Some girl thought it might be one of the Boys’ room»

«Oh… I hadn’t thought of that. I’m sorry. I just…I was hoping, you know…I was hoping you had gotten some».

«Aaaw, you’re sweet. But really, you really thought I’d hook up with one of them? C’mon Jude, you know me better than that». I walked towards my bed and dropped my bag. It felt good to lie down.

***

I think I might have fallen asleep for a little while. When I opened my eyes, Judy had showered and was applying sunscreen on her white skin (she’s the whitest-white thing I’ve ever seen). I considered saying ‘hey’ to her, but I was too lazy. I find that getting an hour of sleep is worse than not getting any (sleep! Get your mind out of the gutter people…). I never meant to fall asleep but it happened. I was mentally picturing the inside of my suitcase; bathing suit in the upper right pocket, jeans shorts and a tank top.

My plan was simple: shower (and a cold one), sunscreen, get dressed, sunglasses, coffee, catch the shuttle, coffee (I know, I said that already, but you should of seen my face…) and find myself a nice spot to take pictures and hopefully catch some Zs without anyone noticing. Easy, right?

Right. Judy, being her lovely self (maybe she’s being extra nice so I’ll forget she owes me big bucks for this overpriced cabin) offered to get me some coffee, which I gladly accepted. I showered and got dressed and pulled my hair up in a wet messy bun. Sunglasses, Canon and bag in hand, I was ready to catch that shuttle.

On our way down, Judy met with her beau. They exchanged a few words, a kiss (or two) and gave us a paper with instructions. We were to meet with him in the Bahamas, next to some cabana (some sort of white tent) and then he’d hook us up with ‘’it’s okay, they’re with us’’ kind of stamps on their hands (strangely enough, the logo on my hand, made of cheap dollar store ink, looked like Walmart’s smileys) because they were out of passes. The only part of the conversation I remembered at that time was ‘you guys can get chairs if you want’.

We got there, after a weird shuttle ride to the main area. Can you believe our driver knicked a man on a bicycle in the ass? Anyway, we met with Judy’s guy and they allowed us in. I quickly grabbed a chair and sat. Judy went around and explored our surroundings. She came back with coffee #2. I quickly saw Lauren from afar, wearing a long boho skirt and a long sleeved shirt. She must have been hot; I had jeans shorts on and a tank top and I was comfortable. I was glad she was on the other side of the cabana, you never know. Girls from Rose Tour came and introduced themselves (okay, they were probably wondering who the heck we were) and asked us millions of questions about the boys. They were probably thinking we were 2 fans who had won a contest, or found passes on our cabin bed. They got the hint when Judy’s man came our way and chatted for a little while.

I was nauseous and the smell of barbecued chicken wings being cooked near our seats did nothing to help. I was tired and hadn’t had anything to eat in over 24 hours. I simply grabbed my Canon, clicked my Fisheye lens in and took some pictures. I was about to change the SD card when there was a sudden commotion; AJ had entered the ‘zone’ and fans were bunched up at the rope guarding the area, eyeing Judy and I in the process.

Judy came closer and whispered «Hannah, say HI to him».

«I’ll wait until he says HI first» I whispered back.

Judy was dead set on hooking me up with Aj. If only she knew, I thought. Wishful thinking; Aj came our way and sat on the edge of my chaise lounge.

«I see we’re having coffee this morning!» he said

«Beverage of choice, considering last night’s party» I simply added.

«Which deck were you on?»

«Yours actually. We talked…» I said, looking down at my outfit, realizing I looked quite different today.

«Really? Sorry, I talked to a lot of people last night. I might still be buzzed from the hairspray fumes» he said, readjusting his cap.

«Haha, that’s okay. I’m Hannah».

«Aj» he added, shaking my hand. He looked passed me and said «Hey ! It’s Julie, right?»

«Judy» she replied, offering to shake his hand.

Judy looked at me, while AJ was texting someone (it looked like he was texting) and wiggled her eyebrows, trying to have me understand some sort of secret code. I knew what that meant. Unfortunately.

«Say, AJ, how many Urologists did you meet last night, if you can’t remember my awesome friend Hannah here?»

OH no she didn’t! Judy was my best friend, but she loved parading me around, like a new puppy. She had great pride in MY work. She was pretty quite when I was a teacher. She likes to witness how people react when they find out what I do; from the light chuckles, to the ‘you’re joking, right?’. Today would not be an exception.

«Aaaah, that was you? Sorry, you look different today» he said, giving me a not-so-discreet once over; could see his eyes behind his shades. «You look young for a Urologist. Last time I had someone up in my business, number 1 it was a dude and number 2, I swear, he looked like my grandpa –bless his soul-».

«Not a lot of women choose this profession. I was the only girl of my promotion». I informed him.

«No Shit. Hey, that’s a kick ass Canon you got there, can I see?» and he grabbed my camera. While he was busy playing with it, I turned around and gave a mean eye to Judy. I felt my chair sinking lower into the sand and saw Aj’s bodyguard’s right butt cheek resting against the thin material of my chaise. He mumbled something barely audible and Aj stood up.

«Sorry ladies, he’s gotta go» he said, dryly.

And they both left. Judy waited until they were a safe distance from us and grabbed my shoulders. «Oh.My.God Hannah!»

«What?» I asked.

«C’mon, he was hitting on you!» Judy chanted.

«Why, because he was playing with my camera? Hell, the guy at Brandsmart hit on me big time when he sold me this one!»

«Hannah, you know what I mean» Judy

«Bleh!» I stuck my tongue at her, and pushed the camera back into its protective bag. I lifted the thin fabric of my bathing suit to see it I had gotten at least a shade darker. Nah. I sighed to myself, leaned back down and tried to enjoy the sun a bit. I closed my eyes, for just one second and I fell asleep. Again.