Chapter Thirty-Four
My phone rang at 8:14am the next morning, just as the bus was crossing the Georgia stateline. I sat bolt upright and answered, hoping it was Kim. "Hello?" I tried to sound like I'd been awake for hours. I was actually still asleep. Those weird crumbs were still gluing my eyelids closed. I pawed them away.
"Ben? It's Marty."
I felt like groaning but somehow subdued myself. "Hey," I said, "How are you?"
"How am I?" she asked, "I'm about to go see the Backstreet Boys. I'm amazing."
"I should've known," I teased.
"God I don't even know how to tell them how much their music means to me," she gushed, "I can't even put words around it sometimes. I'm so nervous I'm going to say something stupid..."
I leaned back into the pillows and closed my eyes. "I'm sure you'll be fine," I answered.
"What should I wear?"
"Jeans and a t-shirt, probably," I said, "I mean shoes would be nice, too."
"Funny," she said dryly. Marty paused, "Actually I was just calling to see how early would be too early to get there?"
"We're not even there yet."
"So too early then. Got it."
"Yeah a little."
After agreeing with Marty that somewhere around one o'clock wouldn't be too early or too late to really enjoy the atmosphere, she hung up and I rolled over in the bunk and staredat my phone, willing Kim, wherever she was, to follow suit and call. I racked my brain trying to think if I'd told her what day I'd be in Georgia -- but of course she knew, until two nights before we'd both been counting down together.... and yet I was stuck with Radio Silence.
At one, I excused myself from the crew setting up the stage and took a walk out to the outer reaches of the parking lot. The fence that surrounded the arena was packed with fans, leaning and waiting, watching the buses intently. Brian and Leighanne had been out earlier visiting and signing autographs while Baylee played basket ball, but they'd gone in and the girls waiting now were mostly the ones waiting for Nick.
"Are the guys on the bus still?" some girl with Howie's name written on her forehead asked.
"They took off awhile ago," I answered. A collective groan worked its way through the crowd of them. "Stick around, though, they might come out and visit with ya'll later, okay?" I suggested. Most of them heeded the advice.
I squeezed out from the fence and moved a little ways down the block to separate myself from the crazy girls waiting for the Boys and watched traffic passing by until I heard the name Ben being shouted. I turned and saw Marty coming across the street from a subway outlet. "BENNNN!" Marty was shouting excitedly, waving her arms. I waved back and greeted Marty with a hug when she got to the curbing. She grinned. "I can't believe I'm here," she announced, looking at the venue.
"Well, its happening, so start believing," I teased.
A van slowed on the street and the window unrolled and AJ peered out from inside. "Hey," he said, "What up? Why're you out on this side of the fence?"
"Meeting up with Marty," I said, gesturing to her. She was staring wide-eyed at the car, her jaw dropped. I turned back to AJ, "You might be able to tell she's a fan." She nodded.
AJ laughed, "Want a hitch inside the venue?" He pointed at the girls migrating towards us, curious looks on their faces since they couldn't quite see AJ inside the car.
Marty was already lunging for the car by the time I got out the words if it's not a huge trouble. We climbed inside the car and AJ rolled the windows up just as some girls caught on what was going on and ran toward the car. They started flocking around it, staring in, looks of terror and exhileration on their faces (looks that matched Marty's face). AJ didn't seem to notice the multitude of ladies following the car, instead he just turned to Marty. "So you're a fan, huh? How do you know Ben here?"
"I worked with him at the Little Red Hen," she answered. "I'm in the deli."
"Cool shit," AJ answered. He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. "You mind?" he asked.
She shook her head.
"Course not, Marty smokes like a chimmney," I said with an eyeroll.
Marty flushed.
"Well in that case, how rude of me." AJ pulled a second cigarette out of the case, and handed it to her. "Light?" he offered.
Marty stared at the cigarette like it was made of gold.
"She may frame it," I said.
AJ laughed. "How long have you been a fan Marty?"
She cleared her throat, "For a long time, but especially the last four years or so."
"Yeah?"
Marty nodded, "Yeah. I was on the cruise ya'll did just before --" she hesitated.
"Ah," he nodded, "Yeah. Before Kevin." His eyes flickered at me, a bit of a question in them, but I looked away.
"It was really nice," she said, smiling.
"We had fun on cruises," AJ answered.
"You should do another sometime," she said hurriedly. She was still clutching the cigarette. AJ had given up waiting and lit his. "It would be lovely to get a break from...everything...like that again." Marty smiled.
The car had gotten through the gates into the venue lot and AJ reached for the door handle and climbed out, "We've been working on it. I mean it sounds stupid but it's hard getting back on ya feet after losing someone like Kevin."
"I know the feeling exactly," Marty said, following him out of th car. I scrambled to also as they started walking across the parking lot. For short people, I found myself trotting to keep up with them as the fans along the fence went wild screaming for AJ to go visit with them.
I wanted to ask Marty how she knew the feeling, but she'd evidently already told AJ because he was responding when I got close enough to hear them again. "...sucks so bad. Me and my mom are close," AJ was saying, "I think its important to be close."
"I do too." Marty smiled.
I sighed and made a mental note to ask her later.
AJ led the way into the venue and down several winding hallways until we were in the backstage area where the guys got hair and make-up done. Nick was in a chair already and Brian was sprawled across an overstuffed chair, reading an article about the Lochness Monster outloud. Howie was MIA.
"Fellas, meet Marty," AJ announced as we walked through the door.
"Hi," Nick said, baring his teeth into his iPhone camera. He started picking at them with his baby fingernail. He didn't look over until Brian had stopped reading the Nelly article and gotten up and come over to shake Marty's hand. "Who's that?" Nick asked, turning.
"Marty," I answered, "She's my co-worker, the one I needed tickets for."
"I thought that was a dude, Oscar Meyer or something."
"Mr. Wilder," I corrected him.
"Whatever." He paused, "Hi Marty. I'm Nick."
"Hi," Marty shook his hand, too. "God I can't believe I'm here," she muttered. "I'm sorry. I'm trying to be sane acting, it's just really hard when your heroes are right in front of you."
"Heroes?" The way Nick repeated the word, I could tell his ego was expanding. Like a Chia pet.
"Your music helped me through an extremely hard time in my life," she explained.
Brian smiled, "It's always good to hear that we helped someone with it. I mean it's what we love you know, so it's awesome when someone else can be touched the way we are by the music."
Howie came in the room behind us. I noticed, but Marty was entranced by Nick and Brian and AJ. To get by her, Howie put his hands on her shoulders, "Excuse me," he said, shifting her slightly towards me. He was rewarded by a shriek of shock from Marty as she jumped out of the way. He looked perplexed.
"Oh goodness," Marty said. "I'm sorry, I'm just not used to.... to being pushed aside by a Backstreet Boy, I guess."
I laughed, "Alright, why don't we go get you a seat for soundcheck and stop freakin' the Boys out?" I suggested. Nick smirked. "We can come back and talk to the fellas after the show, okay?"
Marty hesitated. "Okay," she nodded, "Soundcheck. Let's go." She backed out of the room, keeping her eyes on the guys like she was hypnotized.
"Toodles Marty," Nick shouted, waving with just his finger tips.
"Nice meeting you," Brian and AJ added in a chorus.
"I'll - er- meet you later," Howie said.
I led Marty around the stage to the seating that I'd already set up that morning on the floor by the side of the stage. We sat and she rubbed her knees with excitement. "I still can't believe I'm here," she commented.
"It's neat, huh? Seeing a show before the show?"
Marty nodded, "It's unbelievable."
I smiled. I could tell from her voice how much this all meant to her. "How long have you been a fan of these guys?" I asked her.
She laughed, "A really, really long time..." An air of nostalgia welled up in her, "God, my Michael was soooo aggrevated when I'd play them in the car or go crazy about seeing an appearance they did. He was in high school so stuff like that embarassed him, like when I wore a Backstreet Boys t-shirt to parents night." Marty shook her head, "He'd die if he knew I was here."
I laughed. Then I remembered something. "I thought you said you didn't have kids?" I asked. I could've sworn we had that conversation once.
Marty smiled ruefully, "Well I guess I don't anymore," she shrugged. "I don't really like talking about it, so I tend to say I don't have one."
"What happened?" I asked.
"He sort of disowned me," she answered, "It's a long story. I was too judgmental. I should've just accepted him like he was, you know?" Marty shrugged. "He hasn't called me in almost five years now. I don't know a blessed thing about him."
"That sucks," I answered.
Marty nodded, "Yeah. Anyways, he never would've approved me being here, I'm sure," she laughed.
"Oh well," I answered.
Marty smiled, "You're a good kid, Ben."
"Thanks."
"I'm sure you make your mother proud," she added.
I hesitated. "Yeah," I agreed. Which reminded me that I had to get backstage again because Ann Richardson, who may or may not have been my mom, was going to be arriving any moment and I had to go meet her. I looked at my watch. Literally - any moment now. I turned to Marty, "Hey I gotta go take care of some stuff, but Justin's gonna be out in a few minutes to start organizing this and getting the fans in and then the Boys will be out. You okay here?"
Marty nodded, "I am. I just like the atmosphere of it, you know?" she smiled.
"Okay," I answered, "I'll be back before the soundcheck's over," I promised.
I trotted backstage, leaving Marty sitting in the arena, looking around, awe-struck by it all, and found my way backstage, my head full and my heart heavy. I felt like something was gnawing at my stomach. I found the Boys still in their dressing room, a short woman with dark hair sitting on the chair Brian had previously occupied. They all looked up as I walked in the door. Nick bit his lips and AJ looked from Ann to me with his eyes like he was watching a tennis match.
"Aunt Ann," Brian said, "This is a friend of ours." He motioned for me to come in and I couched down, looking Ann in the eyes, and shook her hand. I could feel that the Boys were all holding their breath... waiting for her to react to me or to leap up and wrap her arms around me sobbing like I was the prodigal or something.
"It's nice to meet you," she said.
After Self by Pengi
