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No, Brian wasn’t worried.
Why should he must felt worried?
There was no reason at all to be worried and, if there had to be one, of course it wouldn’t be the fact that he last heard Nick only the night before. Twenty – four hours had passed since that goodnight whispered sleepily on both sides.
So no, Brian wasn’t worried.
He wasn’t even anxious and that was not the reason why he kept glancing towards his phone, like it could start ringing with only just one glare.
Why should he be anxious over the fact that Nick was keeping his mobile phone turned off and he hadn’t call him to just say that he was okay?
Why should he be anxious over the fact that Nick hadn’t come to the coffee – shop like he usually did before his first class in the morning?
He wasn’t feeling any kind of anxiety or fear: it had happened before, times and times when both of them were too busy learning books over books for an exam or those days when he had came close to the idea to just move in and live in the cafeteria, having being there almost every hour because Aj was sick and he had no one who could help him. Yet, in those moments, they’ve always informed each other. Messages were being sent, quick visits with reinforcement of foods and cuddles and promises to dedicate one day only to themselves once it was finished.
They never did this, they never just vanished in the air without a word.
So no, Brian wasn’t worried about what that absence from Nick’s part could mean. He wasn’t fearing that Nick had finally grown tired of him and moved on with someone else, like he had always done with his past conquests. No, that wasn’t his fear in that particularly moment: because he had know a different Nick and that man he had fallen in love with wouldn’t be able to do a such horrible thing.
No, he wasn’t worried.
Maybe, he could admit that he was a little bit anxious.
Upset.
And still the phone didn’t want to ring.



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The clock had struck the nine o’clock when someone announced his presence at Brian’s door. From the alcove Brian had built around himself on the couch – blankets where he could swim inside, lots of cushions and one small bowl of ice cream that was slowly melting – Brian got up unwillingly, glancing at that metallic and high tech object that still wasn’t working.
But, when he opened the door, he found himself brought back to that night month and months before, though Nick was simply standing in front of him, hands in the pockets of his jeans and biting his lip in what Brian had came to learn it was a nervous habit.
“I’m sorry. – Nick apologized before event getting inside. – I got stuck in the university, my teacher wanted to talk about my thesis and I couldn’t say no...”
“And you were there until nine?”
“I had an interview. At the “Frick Museum”. I didn’t tell you... well, you’re my boyfriend so of course you would have tell me that I was going to get the job. I wanted to tell you about it once I was sure that I didn’t get the job because I didn’t have much experience or because I still haven’t my degree...”
“An interview?”
“Yes. As assistant curator. Well, it’s a stage so that means I’m paid the minimum but it’s still something and...”
That smile made every little bit of fear and worry melt away and Brian couldn’t help to smile in return, as he approached the guy and slid his arms around his waist. “You’ve got the job.”
“I’ve got it.”
Together, they closed the door behind their backs and, once they were in the middle of the living room, Brian turned away from Nick. “You’re staying for dinner right?”
A simple nod before speaking something Nick would had wanted to say before everything, words that he had rehearsed over and over on his way. But they disappeared, replaced with a security that had been always by his side. “I would never do that to you, Brian. I would never break up and leave you without saying something. Without saying goodbye.”
“I know.” Brian only said before disappearing in the kitchen.