Every Road Leads Back

By Dottie

Copyright 2012

Chapter 24

            AJ and Nick stare at each other while Giselle unlocks the door. When they are all inside, Nick says, "Umm, Giselle...can we talk?"

            AJ steps closer to Nick. "I think you need to leave, Nick. You've done enough."

            Nick glare is deadly. With a calm voice, he says, "I wasn't asking you...I was asking Giselle."

            AJ meets his stare with a furious one of his own. "I won't let you hurt her again, Nick. She's been through enough."

            Giselle steps up to them and puts her hand on AJ's arm. "Hey, don't do this. I can...I'll talk to him, AJ. Please...just give us a few minutes."

            AJ pulls his gaze from Nick and looks at Giselle. He kisses her forehead and whispers, "Yell if you need me."

            After he disappears to his room, Nick and Giselle stare at each other.  Finally, she sits on one end of the couch and says, "What did you want to talk about Nick?"

            He licks his lips and sits down. "I'm sorry G. About everything. I was stupid and...I'm sorry."

            She shakes her head, not meeting his gaze. "Nick, it's over. I don't want to rehash it, ok?"

            He timidly reaches over and touches her hand. She stiffens and he pulls away. "G, I mean it.  I really am sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone when..."

            When he hesitates, she snaps. "When what, Nick? When I found out I was pregnant? When I found out I lost my baby? You were too busy fucking your groupies to give a damn about what I was going through! Did you even care? Did it BOTHER you to know that the life you and I created didn't make it?"

            By now, the tears are flowing freely and she's trembling in rage. AJ comes running down the stairs. "What the fuck is going on? Nick, what did you say?"

            She jumps up and slams her hands on AJ's chest. "NO! This doesn't concern you right now. This is between us. GO!" He stares down at her, stunned. He grabs her face and brushes her tears away. She sighs and whispers, "Please AJ? I'm ok."

            He nods, throwing a glare at Nick. "I'll be in my room."

            After he leaves, she turns to Nick. "What was I to you, Nick?"

            He drops his gaze. "I don't know. I did...do...care about you G. I just felt like it was too serious between us."

            She sniffles. "You knew I loved you. You used me to get yourself off.  I was just another fuck, huh?"

            He grimaces. "No, G, you weren't. I told you, I was stupid. I'm sorry, dammit!"

            She turns and whispers, "Nick, you need to go. I...accept your apology."

            He takes a chance and steps up behind her, putting his hands on her shoulders. "Please, look at me, G." When she turns, he says, "I was never good enough for you, was I?"

            She steps back and says, "No, Nick. I'm not the person you need. I see that now."

            His eyes flick away; then back. "Giselle, I've always needed you. Even now. I see what a fool I was, but it's too late, isn't it? I ran out of chances."

            She trembles. "Please, don't do this Nick.  I can't...I can't take it."

            He cups her face in his hands and slowly lowers his head to hers. When their lips touch, he swallows her sob and crushes her to his body. She holds on to him tightly, aching to have him fill her again, like he did so long ago.

            When their lips part, he presses his forehead to hers. "What can I do? How can I prove to you I mean it?"

            She wants to take him to her room. Have him make love to her all night. But she sees a light in his eyes that scares her. A hunger that isn't for her. She pushes away gently and says, "I want you to get help Nick. Serious help. I'm afraid for you. I lost you once. I lost our baby. I lost AJ. I can't lose anyone else. Please."

            His eyes burn into hers. "You sound like all the guys. I don't need ‘help' G. I can stop it all...for you...all you have to do is tell me. No more drinking. No partying."

            She knows he's scared. She keeps pushing anyway. "What about the drugs, Nick? Can you stop those too? Look at yourself. Nick, I'm so afraid. You're killing yourself. Please...talk to someone. Get into a program. PLEASE!"

            He pushes her away. "I don't have a problem, G."

            She sniffles and says, "You do, Nick. You're sick and you need help."

            He stomps to the door.  He turns back to her and says, "I may be sick...because I still want you.  Still love you.  And that doesn't mean shit to you, does it?"

            Before she can answer, he storms out, slamming the door. She drops down onto the couch, sobbing.  AJ comes into the room some time later, finding her curled up in a ball, crying her eyes out. He scoops her into his arms and carries her to her bed.

            He sits her on the edge and kneels down, slipping off her shoes.  She lies down and rolls on her side, still sobbing. He lies down with her and pulls her close. She snuggles on his chest and hears him say, "I'm sorry Elle."

            Two months later, Giselle is settled into her own place. A nice cottage on Paula and Hoke's property that they insist she uses. She wants to pay rent, but they won't allow it. So she adamantly refuses to stay if they don't at least let her pay her own utilities.  They reluctantly agree.

            She's sitting at her dining room table in a long t-shirt, sipping a cup of coffee and reading the paper. She had found a job as assistant manager of an upscale boutique. She's not scheduled to work this particular Sunday, which she hates. When she has days off during the week, she can always find things to do to keep herself busy. But weekends are hard. She just sits home alone, depressed.

            Hearing someone knock on her door startles her. Figuring it's Paula wanting her to join them for lunch, she doesn't bother getting a robe. Imagine her shock to open the door and find AJ standing there. Not thinking about what she's wearing, she leaps into his arms, squealing.

            He chuckles, hugging her tightly, lifting her off the ground. When he puts her down, she pulls back and says, "You look so GOOD!"

            He looks down her body then back to her face and says, "So do you, Elle."

            She blushes to the roots of her hair and says, "Come in, I'll go get dressed."

            He laughs and says, "Don't, please. I haven't seen a beautiful, half dressed woman in months. Let me drool."

            She sticks her tongue out and says, "Coffee's in the kitchen. I'll be right back."

            When she comes back in shorts and a tank top, AJ says, "Girl, you look awesome. What's his name?"

            She sits down and says, "There is no he. I have a great job, a great place to live.  I'm...happy."

            He looks at her quizzically. "Happy, huh? Why do I think you're lying?"

            She sighs. "AJ, I'm not seeing anyone. I really am happy...but days like today...I just get lonely. That's all." Shaking her head, she says, "Let's talk about you. How do you feel?"

            He knows he won't get an answer now, so he answers her questions. "I'm ok, I think. It's been 74 days since I had a drink."

            She grabs his hand and says, "I'm SO proud of you, AJ!" He looks down and blushes. She knows there's more. "What? What are you hiding?"

            He chuckles. "I never could hide things from you, could I?"

            She shakes her head. "Nope. That's why you ignored me for so long. You knew I'd see through the bullshit."

            Nodding, he says, "You're right. I was ashamed of what I was doing. I was really messed up Elle."

            Grinning, she asks, "So, what else is there?"

            The smile on his face lights up the room. "I'm dating someone.  It's kind of new but she blew me away."

            Giselle rubs his arm and says, "Who? Where did you meet her?"

            He says, "She was a nurse at my rehab. God, how I hated her at first.  Like Attila the Hun. Then, I don't know, one day, I just...had a meltdown. She was there and helped me through it."

            She scoots her chair closer to him. "Meltdown? About what?"

            He stares at the table. "Mainly my dad leaving. But my mom, you...all the people I disappointed. Even Nick and his shit."

            He lifts his gaze to hers and sees her crying. She whispers, "I was never disappointed in you AJ. Just worried."

            He wipes her tears and says, "I know. I'm sorry." Taking a deep breath, he says, "Nick's in rehab now."

            The shock on her face is unmistakable. "What? When?"

            He shakes his head. "A couple of weeks ago."

            She lowers her gaze. "I'm glad."

            AJ sighs. "Me too. You ok?"

            Nodding, she says, "Yeah. I just...For so long I thought he was the one, you know? Then, I figured out he wasn't.  Just when I think I can move on, another curve ball with his name on it."

            AJ chuckles. "Listen, I'm glad he's getting help...and I'm all for second chances. You gave me one. Mom did, the guys did. Hell, even Brooke. She is willing to overlook my past and give me a chance."

            Giselle smiles. "I think I like Brooke already."

            He smiles back. "Good. Cause I need a favor."

            She turns to him and smiles. "Anything."

            He leans closer and kisses her cheek. "Can we crash here till I find a place for us? If things go well with Nick in rehab, we're gonna...we're gonna try to record again."

            She smiles so big her cheeks hurt. Throwing her arms around his neck, she says, "YES, you can stay here. I'm so glad to have you back, AJ!"

            He hugs her, letting his head rest on her shoulder. "Me too, Elle. I never knew how much I needed you till you weren't there."

            She sniffles, pulling away. "I was always there, AJ. Even when you didn't want me to be."

            He smiles. "I was an idiot. I'm glad we're back, Elle. You're my best friend and I won't take you for granted again."

            She laughs. "I won't let you. Now, when do I get to meet Brooke?"