One Month Later
Lauren stood at the airport holding Rochelle's carry on bag, looking around LAX as the people flowed around her. She watched tourists with cameras hanging around their necks walk past, looking around with wide eyes. Rochelle returned from the ticketing booth, carrying the boarding pass, her wallet, a pair of sunglasses and her passport in one hand. She'd just dropped off her Ed Hardy hardshell suitcase at the counter and now she had to say goodbye one more time before she'd be taking a hiatus to bidding things farewell. Of course, it had to be one of the hardest. Not the hardest, obviously, but one of the hardest.
"Thanks," she said, taking her duffle bag back and shouldering the strap. Rochelle stood awkwardly in front of Lauren, running her free hand across her other elbow, staring down at the bright orange ballet flats that encased her feet. "And thanks again for taking Panda," she said, "I really didn't want to get rid of her..." She paused. She didn't want to think about the other dogs - the 'babies' that she and Alex had shared, the ones that she'd given away to various friends and family members because she couldn't handle them all alone. She just hadn't been able to part with Panda, though, because she was Alex's secret favorite, the one he never would've forgiven her for, even from Heaven, for giving away.
Lauren nodded, "No problem. Nick loves Panda, he won't mind a bit." This was a lie. They both knew it was a lie. Nick hated small 'yappy' dogs. Nick had never liked any of the crazy menagerie AJ had collected over the years. But Lauren wasn't about to ask Nick about taking Panda, for two reasons: one, that would raise the question of where AJ was, and two, she was afraid he might say 'no' and honestly she couldn't say no to Rochelle even if she'd wanted to. That and she was pretty sure Nick would be perfectly fine with taking Panda once he knew where his heart had come from.
"I'm going to miss you," Rochelle said, looking at Lauren.
"I'm going to miss you," Lauren replied, tears falling over the ducts of her eyes and scrolling across her cheeks.
"Tell Nick I hope he feels better, and to stay healthy and strong," Rochelle choked out the words, "For Alex."
"Rochelle, I'm --"
"Shhh," Rochelle shook her head, "Don't." She drew a deep breath. "Not yet. We can talk about it another time. When it's not so raw." She hugged Lauren to her tightly. "I just want you to know that if this had to happen - if this had to be how things were - that I'm glad Alex's heart went to Nick." Her voice broke.
Lauren felt like her throat would explode with emotion as she hugged Rochelle tightly. "I love ya, sister," she whispered in her ear.
"Love you too," Rochelle choked.
They pulled apart and Rochelle swiped her eyes with the back of her hand. She walked quickly to the escalator, reminding herself to breathe, swallowing air in large gulps, trying to get enough oxygen. She looked back and Lauren was still standing there, staring, tears glistening in the overhead lights of LAX. Lauren waved.
"I'll send you a postcard," Rochelle called.
Nick was sitting up in bed, eating a cup of green Jell-O. I Love Lucy played quietly on the TV in the corner of the room. Lauren was sitting beside him, staring out the window. Nick licked the spoon. "If I never see a Jell-O cup again in my life, it'll be too soon," he commented. She didn't respond. "Lauren?" She still didn't look up. "Hey babe, is it a'ight if I order a bacon and pepperoni pizza with extra cheese?"
"You can't eat that shit." Lauren broke out of her reveries.
Nick grinned, "I thought that might get your attention." Lauren sighed, and looked back out the window. Nick frowned. "Hey," he said, reaching over with the spoon and poking her shoulder. She looked over. "You didn't laugh," he said.
"At what?"
"I'm being funny," he said in a whiney voice.
"I'm sorry," she said, "I didn't notice."
Nick frowned in disapproval again. "Dude you're supposed to notice." He put the spoon down on the tray and shoved the tray away. "What'cha distracted 'bout?" he asked.
"I'm just... thinking," she replied. Truthfully, she'd been thinking about Rochelle. But if she told Nick that, he'd ask about AJ and well... she still hadn't told Nick about AJ. It was a subject they'd been dancing around for the last couple weeks. It was hard to believe it'd been a month since everything had happened. So she swallowed back her worries, stood up, and surveyed his tray. "You need to eat more than just the Jell-O." She pushed the tray back to him. "Look - eggs, eat the eggs."
"The eggs need salt," Nick complained, pulling a face.
"You can't eat salt," Lauren replied, relieved that Nick had been effectively distracted from the topic of what she'd been thinking about.
"But I need salt," he whined.
"Salt is bad for you," she replied.
"Eggs without salt taste like rubber balls." He looked up at her sadly.
Lauren sighed, "Okay, so try the toast."
"The toast is dry." He poked it with his index finger. "Needs butter."
"Butter is --"
"Bad for me, I know," he interrupted. Nick frowned. "Everything tasty is bad for me."
"Not everything," Lauren replied.
Nick nodded, "Yeah-huh, everything." Lauren picked up a cup of peaches and held it out to him. "Dude, me and AJ won't be able to do our hot dog contests next tour!"
Lauren blanched at the mention of AJ's name.
Nick caught the expression, but luckily misread it. "I know you think it's gross, but me and AJ have fun doing it. And plus I made that fifty bucks that one time, remember? Remember that one time? When I beat him at the contest and I got the fifty bucks?"
Lauren nodded, "I remember."
"Hey," he said, looking over at her, "Yanno... I just thought of something tasty I can still have."
"Oh?" Lauren felt like she was walking on eggshells. She kept waiting for the question. Where were the fellas, where was Brian, Howie, Kevin? Where was AJ? None of them had come by yet to visit, all of them were waiting until he knew about the heart.
Nick grinned and grabbed her hand, took the peaches out of it, and put them down on the tray. He pulled her closer. "You're low calories, right, babe?"
Lauren forced a laugh and wrapped her arms around his neck, crawling onto the bed with him and nuzzling against his chest. She had no idea how she was going to tell him the truth.
