After: It Means Life
Ashley
"Welcome back."
I opened my eyes.
I was back on the cool stone and that watery floral scent filled my nose once more and Leslie was standing there again. I hands shook. "Please," I said, "I made a mistake."
"A mistake?"
"I don't want to die," I begged.
Leslie stared at me, silent.
"I was wrong. I don't want to die. I need rest, but not here. I need rest in my life. I need -- I need Nick." I paused. "And he's going through so much right now, with the band and because of Nacho and, well, me..." I paused. "I think we need each other, Leslie."
Leslie nodded. "I think you do, too."
"So see," I said, my throat raw, "I made a mistake."
"So wake up," she said.
I realized suddenly that this was the part Nick never told me. How it was he had managed to wake up. I closed my eyes and opened them, only to find that I was there in the midst of my vision still, Leslie still staring at me. I tried again... and again... and a sort of panic seemed to start taking over. "I can't wake up," I said, scared.
"You can do it," Leslie said encouragingly.
"How?" I asked, desperately.
"Just... think about how much you need and love your life," Leslie said, "And... go back to it."
I closed my eyes.
And a moment later, I sat up, sucking in air that burned my lungs. It made me dizzy. The light was there, blinding me from above again, and I heard the doctors shouting and for one fleeting moment before they descended upon me again, I saw Nick's tear stained face.
I panted air, feeling like I could never swallow enough of it.
It seemed like forever before the doctors slowly, one by one, disappeared from my bedside, as each one's tasks were completed. And soon a space opened up wide enough that Nick squeezed in and he grabbed my hand the moment he got to the side of the bed. He had tears streaming down his face like rivers. He kissed my palm and my forearm and my elbow and then leaned down and kissed my mouth, laughing through the tears and the kisses. "Oh Jesus, oh Jesus," he muttered, "I thought you left me."
"I thought I did too," I said hoarsely.
Nick leaned down, hugging me in an awkward way, his face pressed against mine. "I love you," he said thickly. "Oh fuck do I love you."
"I love you," I replied.
Dr. Jorryn appeared at my side. "That was a close call there, Ashley."
"What happened?" I asked.
"There was a lot of internal bleeding we didn't anticipate..." he stare down at me gently, "You were hemorrahging. We had to take out the baby to get to the spot you were bleeding from... You flatlined for about two full minutes," he added.
"Longest two fucking minutes of my life," Nick muttered into my skin.
"But you're strong, you're very strong, Ashley," Dr. Jorryn said.
"Strong and beautiful," whispered Nick.
Dr. Jorryn cleared his throat. "Speaking of strong and beautiful..."
And a nurse came over, and she handed Dr. Jorryn something. "Thank you, Presley," Dr. Jorryn said. He turned to me. "Ashley... Nick... would you like to meet your little girl?" Nick moved as Dr. Jorryn turned toward me and carefully lowered my little baby onto my bare upper chest.
Nick
I leaned down to look too.
"Holy shit," I whispered.
Ashley wrapped her arms around the baby softly. I felt tears in my eyes. And I was so in love with her I couldn't believe that much love could exist. Even with all the love I had for Ashley, I couldn't imagine ever feeling this much love. It was unearthly.
"She looks just like her momma," I whispered. The baby had Ashley's eyes and a narrow nose and a patch of bright, bright red hair.
"Beautiful, beautiful baby," Ashley whispered.
I stared at her, my arms still awkwardly around Ashley. "She needs a name," I whispered. "We can't just keep calling her baby."
"Might I make a suggestion?" Dr. Jorryn asked.
We both looked up at him.
"Zoey," he said.
"Zoey," I tried the name out on my tongue.
"It means life in the Greek," he said.
I looked down at Ashley.
"Zoey," she whispered, and she smiled, "I like that. What do you think?" she looked up at me, then back down at the baby.
"I think Zoey is perfect," I answered thickly.
Chapter End Notes:
There is a 4th story in the Nick & Dogface series... Look for it tomorrow! :)
