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Chapter Eight: Carry On


Ashley

Yep, pretty sure death by sexual desire's a real thing.

He was just so damn sexy doing man things, like real man things not dancing on a stage and stuff, that I couldn't get my brain out of the gutter it was rooted in. I needed him. I wanted him to throw me down right there in the Mojave desert sands and we'd make sexy sand-angels with our writhing, passion filled bodies...

I was so regretting telling him to woo me that morning. By woo me, I'd really meant carry me downstairs, put on the Sleepless in Seattle DVD, and make out with me for the 90 minutes it's playing, then we're good, not bring me on a four hour road trip to sin city and subsequently get us stranded on the desert road while you look for your nuts.

Haha. Nick couldn't find his nuts. I couldn't help but giggle.

I sat down in the front seat of the car, watched him, rubbed my stomach and tried like hell not to think about sex.

It wasn't possible.

"The nut things gotta be here somewhere," he said. He'd climbed over the guardrail and was kicking dirt around, inspecting the ground. Dust covered his shoes and ankles, his knees scraped up and dirty from kneeling on the tar, shirt clinging to his sweaty chest, hair all droopy. Somewhere along the line, my rational side knew he'd crossed the line between sexily dressed and a hot mess, but he still looked like prime sexual fodder to me.

A car went by, slowed down only marginally as it passed us, swerving toward the other side of the road to give us a wide berth, then sailed on down the freeway. I squinted off into the distance. Nick sighed. He looked up, hands on his hips and followed my gaze. "It's only like four miles," he said. He looked back at me.

I looked at him.

"That's walkable," he commented.

I raised an eyebrow.

"Think that gas station has an extra nut thingy laying around I could buy?" he asked.

"I don't know, I can't walk it, though," I replied. I looked around the car. "And you can't just leave me here," I added. "Nick, just call Triple A."

He sighed, "You're right."

Thank God. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and swiped his thumb over the screen. I leaned into the seat and closed my eyes. I was exhausted. But I wanted to be more exhausted. My mind wandered over the idea of him suddenly throwing the phone off into the sand, rushing me, and ravishing me in the backseat. I'd put my legs up on the headrests and we'd --

"Fuck."

I opened my eyes.

Nick looked up, fully disgruntled. "There's no reception."

"There's reception everywhere," I answered.

"Not here," he replied.

"Bullshit," I answered. I struggled to get up and went over and looked down at his phone. He was right. I looked around. "We aren't that far from civilization, why the hell is there no reception?" I asked.

"I don't know," Nick groaned. He paced, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. "God damn it."

He was frustrated. Frustrated by his plans not working like he wanted them to, despite how hard he was trying. And he was trying really hard. I could see it in his eyes, in the way his forehead crinkled.

"I'll have to carry you," he said, turning to face me.

I laughed. "Carry me?"

"Yes. Carry you. Only until we can get reception."

"Nick, don't be silly, four miles is long enough without carrying a fat, pregnant woma--aah!" I didn't finish the sentence because instead of waiting for the words to come out of my mouth, he'd tromped over and lifted me right up out of the car. I kicked my feet, "Oh my God. Put me down you, mad man."

To be honest, it did scare me a little bit. Last time I'd been picked up like this, it'd been by Chris on the stairs at my old apartment, when I was having contractions, about to have Zoey. I'd been scared to death that day, but now Nick had me in a slightly better position - like he was a fireman, carrying a damsel in distress from furious flames or something. His strong arms hooked under my knees and across my back.

I wrapped my arm around his neck.

I could smell him, feel his muscles flexing against me. And his breath, hot on my breast at the neckline of my dress.

Oh God.




Nick

Ashley's breathing was heavy as I carried her down the highway. Her hands were laced behind my neck and she stared up at me, her eyes wide with suprise and something else, something... I wasn't sure what it was, though. I held her close to my chest, protecting her from the world. Not that there was anything out there in the middle of the desert to protect her from. Except maybe my luck.

We were both quiet as I walked. I dunno what her excuse was, but I was struggling with where I'd gone wrong in the planning of the perfect Valentine's Day. I'd wanted this to be the most romantic day of her life, I'd wanted to change bad memories, make them into good ones, and all that was happening was this burning wreckage of horribleness. It seemed like everything that could possibly go wrong had gone wrong, and I had little to no hope that would change before the end of the night.

After all, it was official now that by the time we got to the gas station, back to the car to add the nuts to the tire, got the tire fixed, and drove on to Vegas, we were gonna be there, have a quickie, and move like bats outta hell back to LA to pick up Zoey.

"I'm sorry," I said through thick breaths. Ashley was rapidly becoming quite heavy. I couldn't yet see the gas station in the distance, even when I squinted against the sunlight. It felt like an endless road, through endless sands, like we'd been transplanted to another planet without either of us noticing.

"Sorry?" she asked, "For what?" She had her head against my shoulder.

"Lettin' you down."

"You aren't letting me down," she answered.

I took a deep breath, "I feel like I am."

She put her hand on my cheek, "You really aren't." I could almost believe her when I looked into her eyes.

Almost.

About thirty minutes of walking carrying her and my arms felt numb, so I lowered her down and we sat ourselves on a large rock off the side of the roadway. From where we sat, we couldn't quite see the car, but you could almost make out what looked like signs announcing the exit the gas station was off of ahead. I closed my eyes and felt the slowly sinking sun on the side of my face, and I knew we had to get moving again soon or we were gonna be walking through the dark in the middle of the desert, and God knows what was out in the middle of the night in a desert, but I wasn't too keen on learning either.

Ashley got up and was standing a couple feet away, staring off, squinting at the dot that was the possibility of the gas station. "Would you have done it that night? Married me?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

She licked her lips. "Do you think things would be different? Between us, I mean, if we'd done it that night? If we hadn't been through everything with Chris?"

I shrugged. "Maybe not exactly the same, but... I mean. I dunno."

She came over and stood in front of me. "I can walk awhile," she suggested. "I mean I'm two people right now, I must be heavy." She smiled.

I took a deep breath and stood up, too, and we walked along a ways, our hands swinging, tangled up between us. "There must be something about me and Vegas and being pregnant," she joked as we walked along.

I laughed. "At least you knew it before we got here this time."

Ashley laughed. "Have you thought of any names you like this time?" she asked.

"I dunno," I answered, "I kinda like the name Brandon."

"Brandon's a good name. What about Heather?"

"That's good too. How about Lawrence?"

"Jessica."

"Jacob."

"I'm seeing a pattern," she laughed.

"I just really want a boy this time," I admitted. "I need someone to pass along all my wisdom to." I wiggled my eyebrows.

Ashley laughed, "All your wisdom, hm?" she asked.

I nodded.

"Like how not to get to Vegas?" she teased, elbowing me gently.

I laughed. "Apparently. That and the fact that if you suppress your feelings long enough, eventually the universe throws you to the ground from a thousand feet. Whatever it takes to make you open your damn eyes."

"Maybe we'll teach him - or her - how to have feelings without getting in a plan crash," Ashley suggested.

"I like that idea too."

She was slowing down. I turned to her and swept her up into my arms again. She let out a squeal as I lifted her up.