Why Are We Still Friends

By Rachel

Copyright 2014

Chapter 10

Nick and I were hanging out at his house for the first time in over a week. It was nice just spending time with Nick alone.

“So what do you want to do you want to do Alexia? Sitting around is boring.” Nick whined.

“I don’t know. You decide.” We were laying in the middle of the floor in his living room.

“We could play basketball, watch a movie, go swimming, or sit here and pick our noses.” He suggested.

“So many choices, I don’t think I can decide.” I rolled over onto my stomach and looked at Nick.” When did we become so boring?”

“I don’t know about you Miss Alexia, but I’ve never been boring.”

“Nickers, I’ve known you forever. I’ve sat for hours upon hours watching you play videos games. You are the most boring person I know. You’re thirty two years old, and you still spend hours playing video games.”

He tickled my sides. “That hurts. I thought you loved me.” He pouted.

“I love you Nick, but you’re boring.” I giggled.

“I love you, too.” Nick placed a kiss on my cheek. “So what you want to do?”

“Nothing. I enjoy relaxing and just talking to you. We hardly ever just talk anymore.” I smiled at him.

“Well let’s talk then.” He opened his arm and invited me to snuggle in next to him. Of course I took the opportunity to be near him. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Whatever comes out of our mouths. Do you remember how we use to play those stupid games?” I played with hem on Nick’s shirt.

“Yes. My favorite one was when we made up our future lives.” He started laughing.

“What’s so funny?” I asked curiously.

“I just remember how I always gave you Lance Bass or Justin Timberlake as your husband.”

“Yes, you sucked.” I paused for a moment think about how our real lives turned out. “Nick, are you satisfied how your life turned out?”

Nick was quiet for a few minutes. I figured he fell asleep, but he wasn’t snoring. “I’m happy with the way my life has turned out. I’m healthy. I have great friends and a career I love.”

“What about being in love? Don’t you ever wish you had what AJ and Bella have?” I whispered softly. I was curious about what Nick would say.

“I’d love to fall in love. Someday I hope to find someone. AJ and Bella have something special, but I don’t think that’s for me. I’m not sure marriage is for me.”

“Why don’t you see yourself getting married?” I sat up and looked at him.

“My parents’ marriage was full of fighting and hate. I don’t want to deal with that. Plus, why does a ring prove that you love someone more than if you didn’t have a ring. It’s just not for me.”

“What’s up with you and Anna?” I had to know what was going on.

“I don’t know. We’re hooking up, but that’s about it. There’s nothing more going on.” He sat up.

The next question was going to get me in trouble. I normally didn’t ask for details about Nick’s sexual conquests. I just wanted to know what was so hot about Anna. “So is she good in bed?”

“Fuck the things that girl knows how to do in bed. Anna’s like a fucking acrobat.” He was smiling and visualizing her in his head. She was the total opposite of me. “Plus she’s got those big tits.”

“So you like them big and fake, do you?” I attempted to make a joke. I didn’t think it was funny, but I didn’t want Nick to see that I was jealous.

“Geesh, Lexi. I though Anna was your best friend. You’ve stuck by her all these years. What’s changed?”

He would never understand. I was in love with him and he’d rather have sex with my best friend. It was like I was losing both of my best friends.  “Nothing. I just think we’re in different places with our lives.”

“Well you and Anna are different. Anna isn’t afraid to try new things. In bed, she is willing to try every position imaginable. You, on the other hand, are more a traditional girl. You are perfectly fine with doing it missionary.” I glared at him. He started to backpedal. “There’s nothing wrong with being that kind of girl.”

“I may not be a contortionist, but I’m not a traditional as you think I am. You slept with me once and act like you know my sexual preferences.” I was pissed at Nick. Sex with him was awful, but you didn’t see me complaining about it to his face.

“I didn’t say that it was bad to be a good girl in the sack. All I was saying is that you and Anna are different.” Nick tried to defend his comments.

“Personally I’m offended. Everyone thinks I’m such a goody two shoes.”  I stood up.  “I’m getting tired of it.”

“Lexi, that’s cause you do everything by the book. You’re the closest thing to perfect.”

“Yeah except where it really matters.” I exhaled a big breath I didn’t know I was holding in.

“Alexia, what is wrong? I’ve never seen you like this.” Nick walked over to me and attempted to put his arm around me. I backed away from him. “Talk to me. Tell me what is wrong.”

“Nick, I’m going to go.” I slipped my shoes on. “I talk to you later.” I pressed a kiss to his cheek and left.

----------------------

Instead of going home I stopped at my brother’s house. I needed to talk to Bella. She was the only one who knew about my interest in Nick as more than a friend.

AJ was on the porch smoking when I pulled in. “Hey sis. What’s up?”

“Not much. Is Bella around?” I asked quickly.

“She took the kids to the doctor.”

“Oh, well I’m just going to head home.”

AJ grabbed my hand. “Not so fast. Something’s up. Want to talk to your dear old brother?”

There was no way I could talk to my brother about Nick. He had the biggest mouth. Within days everyone would know about us having sex and me being in love with him. It was hard enough talking to Bella about it. I didn’t want my brother involved in my love life. It was bad enough Nick was his friend.

“Come sit down and chat with me. You’re so busy with work and school; I never get time with you.” We took a seat on the wicker loveseat. “Now talk to me.”

“AJ is there something wrong with me? I mean every thinks I’m Miss Perfect.  Am I?”

“Who’s starting shit with you? I’ll kick their asses.”

“We’re not in elementary school anymore. I can fight my own battles.” My brother pouted. “I know you would help me. Just answer the question.”

He grabbed another cigarette. “I think people are jealous of you. You make everything look easy. You always try to do the right thing and help others. I don’t see anything wrong with that. More people should try being that way.”

“I’m not doing it to impress people. I love my job and enjoy helping others.”

“Are you happy, Lexi?” AJ questioned.

I thought about it. Was I happy? There were lots of things I loved about my life. On the other hand, I had a few things that needed fixed. “Yes, but there are a few things that could be better.” I couldn’t look at my brother.

“Lexi, what’s got you down?”

“I want what you and Bella have. I want to be in love. I want to get married and have a family.” I hugged my knees. It was the first time admitting this and I was nervous.

“It will happen. I never thought I would be the one married with kids. It wasn’t in my plans. Some deserving guy is going to sweep you off your feet someday.”

“I doubt that. It’s not like there’s a lot of guys knocking down the door to date me.” Then again I wasn’t actively pursuing the dating scene. I only wanted Nick to notice me.

“Maybe you aren’t looking hard enough.”  AJ draped an arm over my shoulder.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I see lots of guys looking at you, and you totally ignore the signs. Lexi you are the total package, but with your shyness and your work ethic it’s hard for you take that next step.” He said honestly.

“But you’re a workaholic and you found love.” I didn’t get how I was so different from everyone else.

“Yes, but I’m a horny man. I can work and still find time to get into a woman’s pants.” AJ cackled.

“You better not let Bella hear you say that. You won’t be getting any for a while.” I teased. “Seriously, what do I do? Do I change who I am just to get a guy?”

“Lexi, don’t change who you are ever. You are a wonderful person. The man that falls for you will love everything about you. You’ve got to stop thinking of all guys as your friend and look at them like you want to fuck them.”

“AJ, I can’t believe you’re telling me to look at guys like that.” I blushed a deep shade of red.

“You’re not sixteen anymore.  I don’t need to know about your sex life. I’ll always pretend that you are a virgin.” We both laughed. “Seriously, I think you need to look a little closer to home when it comes to guys. Maybe look for one that makes you laugh and enjoys spending time just hanging with you doing nothing. He’s out there.”

Why was he being so cryptic? I was confused by my brother’s last comment. I chose to ignore it. I wasn’t sure who he was talking about, and he wasn’t giving me any clues. Maybe he was telling me that I didn’t need to have such high standards when it came to men. If he only knew I was already in love with someone. A someone that didn’t know I existed in that way. Would I be brave enough to let Nick know the truth?