Chapter Three
Nick
Of all times for Kevin to walk in, he had to choose that one moment that would leave him covered in my cheese fries. His eyebrows arched inward and I braced myself for the wrath of the Dirty Brow. “What the hell?”
The waitress looked just as petrified as I felt. “Oh my God,” she gasped, “I am so sorry, sir, I just - I tripped and --”
Kevin held up his hand to stop her, “This,” he said, “Is not your fault.” He looked at me.
I swallowed.
“Let me get you some paper towels,” the waitress said, as Kevin unbuttoned his nice shirt, which was now not so nice as it was covered in chili cheese.
“Thanks,” he answered and she rushed away.
A bunch of people were staring at us from all over the restaurant. “Isn’t that the Backstreet Boys?” I heard someone whisper somewhere to my left.
Kevin balled up the chili covered shirt, his undershirt a grey muscle tee with a little bit of residue where the chili had soaked through.
Brian was sitting in the booth, staring up at us, his eyes still wide with surprise.
Kevin glared at me, holding up his sopping shirt.
My mouth went dry. “I, was, uh, we were talking, and - well, fighting, and --” I stammered through an explanation. “I didn’t know she was there. It was an accident.”
“Fighting?” Kevin looked at Brian, then back at me, “For fuck’s sake,” he said, irritated.
The waitress came back with a whole roll of Bounty and ripped like a million pieces off and handed them to Kevin, who used them to wipe sour cream off his jeans and shoes and sat down. A guy came out with a mop and dustpan and started sweeping the mess off the floor.
AJ and Howie walked up as the waitress was asking Kevin if he needed a bag for his shirt. “You might as well just throw it out,” he said, dropping it into the dustpan with the rest of the mess.
“I’ll get you another plate of fries,” she told me.
I wasn’t sure I’d be able to eat chili cheese fries ever again.
“What the hell did we miss?” AJ asked, looking around the scene in surprise.
Howie looked at the dustpan as the bus boy rushed off carrying it and the broom. “Looks like a chili cheese fry explosion,” he laughed.
“Nick tripped the waitress,” Kevin supplied, “Fighting with Brian.”
I looked down.
“Again? Jesus,” AJ slid in next to Kevin and Howie pulled out the chair beside me. “What the fuck are you fightin’ about now?” AJ rolled his eyes.
“We weren’t fighting,” Brian injected.
I raised my eyebrow, “No, you’re right, we weren’t fighting, you were basically just attacking me.”
“Attacking you?” Brian’s voice was defensive, “I wasn’t attacking you!”
“Yeah you were, you were talking shit about my temper,” I snapped.
“You started it,” he snapped back.
Howie sat back in his chair with a sigh.
“I didn’t start fuckin’ anything,” I hissed, pointing at him, “You did, baby, you did. You wanna talk about what happened with me and the photographer, fine, that’s fine, but don’t --”
Brian rolled his eyes, “You brought up the damn conversation, Nick, not me.”
“-- don’t -- don’t fuckin’ make it sound like I was wrong for defending myself against him. For defending my fuckin’ privacy.” I glared, “And don’t fuckin’ interrupt me, either.”
“Remember that game, Interrupting Cow?” AJ asked, looking around the table.
I glared at him and he sat back, too, like Howie did, holding his hands palm-up and looking away.
I grabbed my beer and took a sip.
Kevin looked from Brian to me and back again. “Is this what this entire promo run is gonna be like? The two of you bickering over stupid shit?” he asked.
Brian shook his head.
I looked away.
Howie leaned forward, “I would also actually like to know that because I don’t think I can handle weeks of… this.” He waved his hand around the table.
“Fuck no,” AJ said, “I know I can’t.”
Kevin raised his eyebrows meaningfully.
Brian sighed, “I wasn’t fighting,” he persisted.
“Fuck you,” I snapped.
“Hey,” Kevin held up his hands between Brian and I, making the timeout signal. “Knock it the fuck off or I’ll bang your heads together.” He sighed, dropping his hands to the table. “Damn. Damn!” He looked sideways at Brian. “Can you two hear yourselves? Seriously? I thought we got this shit under control?” He looked back at me. “You always are whining for respect and to be treated like an adult, so fuckin’ act like one then. Don’t throw tizfits in restaurants and pick fights over whether y’all were fightin’ or not. And for fuck’s sake watch your fuckin’ mouth.”
The fact that he was saying fuck while scolding me for saying fuck was really fuckin’ ridiculous.
I took a deep breath.
“I’m tired of this,” Kevin said. “I’m tired of you two acting like this.” He looked at Howie and AJ. “Aren’t you two tired of this?”
“Yes,” Howie answered.
AJ just made a grimmace sort of face.
Kevin licked his lips.
“Chili cheese fries… extra sour cream, extra onions,” the waitress said as she came up and put the plate onto the table very carefully. I stared at the plate. “Can I get the rest of you anything to drink? More beer?” she added looking at me.
“No more beer for him,” Kevin replied for me. I glared at him. “I’d like a Manhattan, dry, with Johnny Walker blue label if you got it.”
“Red bull,” AJ mumbled.
“Raspberry ice tea?” Howie asked.
“Just a Sprite,” I mumbled, looking at the silverware triangle I’d made before the whole kerfluffle occurred.
As soon as the waitress had written down all our orders, Kevin leaned forward, pointing between me and Brian, “Now… about you two.”
Brian
“This is bullshit.”
Nick was leading the way to his car a little ways down the street from the restaurant. I followed. Kevin had used valet and AJ had parked the opposite way down the street, so it was just me and Nick and now that we were out of earshot of the other guys he was speaking his mind.
“Fucking absolute bullshit,” he muttered. He was digging his keys out of his pocket, and his phone fell out and hit the cement. “Fuck,” he grumbled and picked it up, inspecting it for damages, but it must’ve been fine because he just shoved it back into his pocket and kept going.
It was dark out, a little chilly for California. l lumbered along behind him and we turned into a parking garage. He jogged up the steps a lot faster than I could, seeing as his legs were about twice as long and he’d been working out hardcore for the past two years. I kept up okay, though. His car was this big ass white truck that Lauren had given him for Christmas. It seemed like every time I turned around the guy had a new big ass white vehicle.
He clicked the button on the key and the lights flashed as the truck unlocked.
I wasn’t sure how comfortable I was riding with him as pissed off as he was. Nick’s always been a bit of a wreckless driver, something that I guess I’m partly to blame for since I’d actually been the one that taught him how to drive, years and years ago in the Bleeding Banana, but he’s actually worse when he’s mad. But I didn’t wanna piss him off anymore than he already was, so I got in and buckled up, pulling the seatbelt tight across my chest.
Nick started the truck. “Where’s your fuckin’ hotel anyway?”
I was getting tired of all his f-bombs.
“Watch your language, will you please?”
Nick looked over at me.
“If I have to stay with you for the next two weeks, then you need to watch your language.”
Nick’s eyes glowered.
“I mean it, I ain’t puttin’ up with the cuss words every other word out of you.”
“Fine.” Nick’s voice seethed with irritation. “Where is your hotel?”
“My hotel is the Marriott by the Hollywood sign.”
“Fine.”
He pulled out of the spot and shot down the sloping driveway to the exit of the parking garage, swiping his credit card at the pay station, and pulled into traffic with barely a glance. I held onto the handle over the window.
Kevin, AJ, and Howie had all come to a very final conclusion. If we were going to fight during the whole promo run then we could do the promo run by ourselves and fight all we wanted because they didn’t wanna hear it. “You can kill each other for all I give a damn,” had been Kevin’s final words on the topic and no matter how much Nick whined and complained, he didn’t budge and he kept Howie and AJ from budging, either. So now we had an itinerary with enough work for five people to split between two people and nobody else to talk to for two weeks while we traveled all over the place doing all this promotional stuff.
They were effectively quarantining us.
Nick clutched the wheel as he drove, glaring straight ahead.
“Jen won’t let them not go,” Nick said after a few minutes, “She’ll make’em go. As soon as she gets wind of this, she’ll make’em go.”
I wasn’t as confident as he was. Jen had been struggling with Nick and I fighting at meetings for some time now and I had a feeling she was going to be a lot more sympathetic to the other guys than either of us and probably would even find the idea to be quite funny.
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
Nick glanced at me. “Aren’t you pissed off, too?” he asked.
“Of course,” I replied. “Just the sheer amount of work they’ve stuck me with --”
“Me, too,” he said defensively, “They saddled us both with it.”
“I know,” I said quickly. “I’m just --” I sighed. “I can’t say anything right with you, can I?”
“Not when you say it in a holier-than-thou kinda attitude,” he replied. “You ain’t no better than me, we both have the same roots.” Nick frowned. “But I always get this feelin’ like you’re judgin’ me, like you’re thinkin’ how glad you are you ain’t as fucked up as me.”
I frowned.
“Sorry,” he said with an edge to his voice, “I didn’t mean to say a bad word.”
I closed my eyes and counted to ten.
Nick
I watched as Brian went inside the hotel while I idled the truck outside. He was just getting his bags and checking out because, per Kevin’s request, he was coming back to my house for the night to begin our two weeks of togetherness. I rolled my eyes as his back disappeared into the lobby of the hotel.
I yanked my phone out of my pocket and called Lauren. “So I got some bad news.”
“Uhoh,” she sighed. “What?”
“Well Kevin’s a dick and he’s making me take Brian home with me tonight. And also the other guys are now not going on the promo run at all. Just me and El Douche.”
Lauren was silent a long moment.
“Can you believe that, boose?” I demanded.
“Brian’s coming here?”
“Yeah.”
“And then it’s gonna be just you and him on the promo run?”
“Yes,” I said. “Well, and you.”
Silence.
“Boose?”
“Nick, I don’t wanna go if it’s just you and Brian. Is Leighanne going?”
“No, she’s in like frickin’ New York or something with Baylee. He’s got that play whatever thing he’s doing.”
Lauren laughed, “Yeah… Nick, no. Do you know how uncomfortable that would be for me?”
“Do you know how uncomfortable it’s gonna be for me?” I asked.
“I’m sure I’ll hear all about it via Skype,” she answered.
I sighed and pressed my forehead against the steering wheel.
She took a deep breath, “Also, I guess this is as good a time as any to tell you, your mother apparently is trying to file a lawsuit of some sort for defamation or something, I don’t know, you better call Lori though before you leave the States tomorrow.”
“Fuck my mother,” I snapped. I closed my eyes. “Fuck my life. Lauren, this day has been so shitty… This whole week has been.” I felt like I might cry. I sucked a deep breath in, trying to zen myself back out of the burning feeling behind my eyes. I felt like everything was coming at me all at once and I didn’t know how much more I could take before I broke. “Please,” I whispered, “Please don’t make me go to Europe alone with Brian.”
Lauren sighed, “Nick… he’s your best friend. You’ll be okay for a couple weeks alone with him. Who knows, maybe it’ll even fix things.”
“No,” I said, “It won’t.”
Brian
We walked into Nick’s front door among two dogs barking, tails wagging, jumping against our knees. Two cats watched from the stairs. I dropped my bag just inside the door as Lauren came down the hallway and engulfed Nick in a hug. He’d been silent the whole way back from the hotel. He pressed his face into her neck now and stayed there an uncomfortable amount of time while she held him tight and rubbed his back. I stared down at the pug dog staring up at me and bent down to pat him as they hugged. When he finally pulled away, Lauren muttered, “It’s okay.” She stared into his eyes a moment warmly, then turned to me. “Hey Brian.”
“Hey,” I answered.
Lauren smiled, “I’d ask if you’re hungry but y’all just ate, didn’t you?”
“Yeah,” I answered, “I’m okay.”
“Do we got beers boose?” Nick asked, heading for the kitchen.
I stood up.
“I don’t think so,” Lauren called. She turned to me. “So, just the two of you, huh?”
“Yeah,” I replied.
She glanced over her shoulder in the direction Nick had gone and then she said in a breath, “I think it’ll be good for the both of you.”
I shrugged, “If we don’t kill each other, maybe.”
“Seriously, Brian, I think this is ultimately going to be a good thing,” Lauren nodded. “Something’s been bothering him lately, and I don’t know what it is, but he’s been really hot tempered and emotional. I love him to pieces, but he’s driving me nuts and I really think you have the power to help him in ways I can’t.”
I sighed. This wasn’t the first female of Nick’s that thought I was some sort of miracle Nick Whisperer or something. I shook my head, “He won’t even talk straight with me,” I said, “I doubt I’ll be able to help him at all.”
“I think the two of you getting along again would be help enough,” she replied. “I think he’s kind of missing the way things were before when it was all five of you and you two were best buds and all that. I think he needs that back.”
I hesitated. “Can you keep a secret?”
“From Nick?”
“Yeah,” I nodded.
Lauren inched closer, “What’s the matter?”
“I’m gonna quit the group,” I said. “After this tour.”
She stared up at me, eyes wide. She shook her head slightly in shock.
Nick came back from the kitchen, “Boose,” he whined, “There’s nothin’ to drink. I dunno how to use the Soda Stream thingy.”
Lauren nodded, recuperating from my bombshell of news. She ripped her eyes from mine, “I’ll do it, what do you want?”
“Orange,” he replied, and he followed her back out to the kitchen, the pug scrambling after them, leaving me in the foyer with the other one of the dogs.
I looked down. “You’re Igby aren’t you?” I asked. He looked up at me and tilted his head to one side. “I hope you can keep a secret, too.”
He laid down.
I sighed.
There's Us by Pengi
