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The Train Home (Lily)


Once she'd had time to blow off steam, Lily felt pretty poorly about the things she'd said to Severus. She wanted to take it back, but she didn't have time to find him – and wouldn't have been able to get into the Slytherin common room even if she had. The students going home for the holiday break had to be down in the entrance hall first thing the next morning and were packed into carriages drawn by invisible horses before even breakfast.

“But I'm starving,” complained Frank Longbottom from behind her and Alice Bell in the line waiting to board the carriages.

Derek Bell poked his stomach with the handle of his broomstick, “Could do with a couple hours starving, couldn't you?” He joked with a smirk. Frank laughed just as heartily as the others in their little cluster.

Bilius cleared his throat, “But don't fear, you won't have to.” He opened his school bag to reveal he'd done a bit of knicking around the kitchens the night before and winked, quickly closing up the bag again before Professor McGonagall could catch sight of it.

“Brilliant!” Derek exclaimed.

A half an hour later, they all piled onto the train and found themselves a compartment. Bilius distributed the treats around and they started snacking as others loaded onto the scarlet red train. Lily couldn't help but peer out the window toward the castle, wondering if Severus was up and if he was still mad at her, if he'd still be mad when she got back from the holiday. She sighed, hating having somebody mad at her. So far, every time she'd been on the Hogwarts Express, she'd had this feeling. The first time she'd worried about Petunia and now Severus.

The thought of Tuney made Lily's stomach flip-flip with nerves. Would Petunia still hate her?

“Hey! Come in and have some snacks!” Bilius called suddenly, waving one of the pumpkin pasties from his bag.

Alice's eyes flashed to Lily, which was what made Lily look up to see who Bilius was calling in, and to her horror it was James and Sirius. Alice looked between the two boys and Lily. As she only other person in the compartment that knew about what had happened the night before at the Slug Club party, only Alice noticed Lily's expression of disapproval. Lily crossed her arms.

“Thanks!” exclaimed James, taking the pumpkin pasty from Bilius. He waved to Derek and smiled at Frank, Alice, and Lily, before sitting down beside Bilius. Sirius joined him. “Think anybody's staying at Hogwarts for holiday?” James asked, “Seems every single compartment on the train is packed!”

“Well Remus is,” Sirius said as he reached for another cake Bilius was holding up.

“And Severus,” offered Lily.

James looked over at her. “Is he?” he asked.

“Is that the Slytherin boy you're mates with?” asked Bilius around a mouthful of cake. “How'd you meet him anyway? It isn't often you see a Slytherin befriend a muggle-born.”

Lily shrugged, “Sev's not a typical Slytherin.”

“Besides, he's half-blood himself, isn't he?” Sirius spoke up. Lily looked at Sirius, expecting him to say something nasty. “It'd be mighty hypocritical of him to go on judging someone by their blood status, being what he is.”

Already on the defense, she demanded, “Being what he is? What's that supposed to mean? Exactly what do you think he is besides a brilliant wizard?” She looked at Sirius with a fire in her eyes.

Alice, Frank, and Derek exchanged amused expressions.

Sirius looked surprised by the venom of her response, “Wel it's just that whole blood status debate all over again, isn't it?” he asked with a shrug.

James smirked at the way Sirius seemed almost timid to reply to Lily's snap. It was rather impressive how quickly Lily had managed to put Sirius into place. As much as he felt sorry for his friend that a girl had jumped down his throat that way, he still couldn't help but admiring the tenacity Lily was displaying. She was a real live wire, he thought, which was something that his father had once said about that sort of person. It was apparently a muggle term, like calling a person electric.

Lily was certainly electric.

“And what's the big deal with blood status?” Lily asked hotly. “Even muggles are people, so why's it gotta be so black and white and separate? It doesn't matter or make any sense at all! I don't really care about who any of your families are; if I like you – or hate you,” she added with a sharp glance at James, “- it's based on you. As a person, on how you treat others.”

Sirius shrugged. “Not all wizarding families agree with you.”

“And not all of them disagree with you, either,” added Bilius. “Look at my family. We're one of the oldest pure-blood families in all the wizarding world and yet we don't give a damn about that blood status rubbish. The Weasley family's always been very open minded about that stuff. As long as you aren't evil, you're welcome with a Weasley.”

Lily waved her hands at Bilius, “See! Now there is logic!”

“None of us are arguing with you,” James pointed out. “Severus is the one who cares about all that, remember?”

“Him and that lot he's been hanging 'round with in Slytherin,” Sirius added. “I know. They're my family. Most of them are my cousins. They're into dark magic and support the Dark Lord. I've heard loads of nasty things about Lucius Malfoy. He's my cousin, you know.”

Lily shook her head, “Well obviously Severus doesn't care.”

“He will if he keeps hanging 'round those people,” Sirius replied. “It's too easy to fall blindly into it. I know. My family kept me blind to it for years.”

“So if your family's so awful, why aren't you like that?” Lily asked.

“I'm a rebel, aren't I?” Sirius asked, puffing up his chest proudly. “I'm only the second in the whole extended family and everything to be sorted outside of Slytherin. First in the Blacks. And to Gryffindor, no less! The ultimate disappointment.” He laughed sarcastically and shook his head with a sigh, “Expect Mother will be waiting at the station with balloons to celebrate my return. I'm sure the whole family's quite proud.”

Lily leaned back, the fight in her taken out by the realization that maybe, as much of a bully as they were, maybe Sirius and James weren't all bad.

Silence filled the compartment.

“So...” Derek Bell said after a few moments of awkwardness, “...It's Christmas.”

“It's here again,” agreed Bilius, nodding.

“Comes a bit faster each year,” Derek said.

“Indeed,” Bilius agreed. He glanced down at the empty bag beside him on the seat, all the sweets he'd knicked from the kitchen gone. “Blimey, we ate all the cakes already!”





At King's Cross station several hours later, the little group shattered into parts as they went to greet their families across the platform. The last to walk away, James and Lily watched Sirius walk dejectedly across the platform towards a dismal looking wizard down the way. James turned to Lily. “Well,” he said, “That's everyone. I hope you have a Happy Christmas.”

“Thanks,” Lily answered. Then, as an afterthought, “You too.”

James nodded. “There's my folks over there,” he said, pointing. “That's my mum with all the kleenex over there.” Lily looked and saw a woman wiping her eyes with a ball of kleenex as she waved frantically to her son. James smiled. “Anyways. You have a good break. See you on the way back.”

“Yeah. See you,” Lily replied.

He winked and turned away. He'd gotten several feet away and she'd picked up her bag and was about to walk away to find her parents in the main hall of King's Cross, when James turned around again, walking backwards away from her. “Hey… Lily… if Severus told you about last night at the party…” he paused, frowning, “Well. Anyways. I'm sorry about it.”

Lily felt a funny twinge roll over her skin, like a warmth from an unexpected source. “I'll make sure he knows,” she said.

“Yeah. Do.” James said.

Lily watched as James rushed off to join his mum, who wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling him tightly to her chest.