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Give It Back


“Sirius, just tell me what it is you’re planning,” James said. Sirius had been pouring over the Marauder’s Map for over an hour, studiously sitting square in the center of Remus’s bed, his Gryffindor tie strung about his head, holding his hair back from his face as he worked, looking very much like a mad scientist.

Sirius shook his head and shoved his wand through the loop of the tie, over his ear and grabbed a bit of parchment, scribbling something down with his quill. “No, you’re grown up now, remember?” He unfolded and refolded the Map and glanced over at James, “Besides, it’s best if you stay out of it, he seems better at getting information from your brains… and I want him to be bloody shocked!”

James eyed Sirius warily. “I just don’t know if I like the look in your eyes is all. You’re acting mad.”

Sirius laughed, “It’s not an act, Potter… not an act…” and he turned back to the Map, still chuckling under his breath in a manic, almost feverish way.

As unnerving as that all was, James couldn’t stick around to bother Sirius for all eternity. He had Quidditch practice and as much as he would have liked to stick around and keep an eye on his madman best mate, he grabbed up his gear and headed down to the pitch (he did try to get Sirius to go along with him to watch, but Sirius refused because he was a master at work and needed to not be disturbed by the petty inconvenience of Quidditch).

Lily Evans was in the stands watching, though, James noticed her halfway through, sitting there all by herself on the benches under one of the awnings, bundled up with her Gryffindor scarf tied around her neck. He tried extra hard at getting practice shots off just right knowing she was looking and nearly toppled off his broom when he got distracted checking to see if she was watching and came centimeters from slamming into Frank.

It started raining while they were practicing and James’s glasses kept fogging up and he was reminded of the day he’d first seen Maryrose, on the train platform in Hogsmeade and she’d cleared his glasses for him. He wished he could remember the spell she’d used… She had seemed so unusual, so strange and smart to him then, so interestingly unique, and she’d had teal hair, he remembered. A pang of guilt went through him and he shot the quaffle extra hard through the rings before calling the practice and sending everyone back to the castle.

He was coming out of the locker rooms, struggling to see through the foggy glasses to find the key to the door when Lily appeared at his side, holding her wand up, an umbrella sticking up from it, blocking the rain. She held it so it covered both their heads. “Have you tried the impervius charm? On your glasses?”

He pulled the frames from his ears and aimed his wand. “Impervius,” he said and they cleared up and the rain simply fell away from them without fogging or streaking. He put them back on and was pleased with how much better he could see. It was exactly the spell Maryrose had used. “Thanks,” he said.

“You’re welcome,” Lily answered. She watched as he put the key in the locker room door and turned, fumbling to put it back in his pocket.

He turned to face her, looking at her with a curious expression on his face. “Did you need something?” he asked.

“I just wanted to apologize,” she said.

James blinked in surprise.

“For this morning,” Lily continued, “In Potions. What I said to you wasn’t very fair, about you taking advantage of me back at Christmas. I know that’s not what happened. And I also wanted to admit that yes, I did sort of take advantage of you that night, with the library and I’m sorry. I wasn’t drunk on Firewhiskey, I suppose I was sort of drunk on adventure, on being around you boys and the fun we’d had, and I was feeling reckless and not really thinking properly, but that’s not an excuse for kissing you. And I’m sorry if that wasn’t what you wanted…” she paused. “I’m sorry I stole a kiss from you.”

He stared at her for several long moments in silence and the words hung in the air between them as the rain ticked against the umbrella that she held over them. James stared at her. “Give it back.”

“What?”

“The kiss you stole.”

“Potter.”

“Evans?”

She rolled her eyes, “I’m not kissing you.”

“But you just said you stole it from me.” James said, “Logically, you stole a kiss from me, so you owe me one. It’s only fair.”

Lily shook her head, “That isn’t how things like that work…”

“Then I’m afraid that I cannot forgive you for what you’ve done, Evans,” James’s voice lilted with lamentation, “You’ve stolen a kiss from my lips - our first kiss, no less. Evans, what am I to tell the children when they ask how we met?”

Lily eyed him, but didn’t answer, she started walking to the castle.

James smirked, and trotted, keeping up with her as she walked quickly up the path through the rain, carrying her umbrella. She lowered it to keep him from getting under it, but that didn’t stop him following. Rather, it made him spring ‘round to the front of her, his broom flung over one shoulder, the rain falling over his head and flattening his unruly hair, making it hang all stringy over his forehead, dripping great rivers over his skin. His quidditch jumper clung to his torso, showing off the muscles he had from playing. “Evvvvvans,” he whined, “You owe me.”

“Will you stop it? I tried to apologize to you and had to go and be a pill about it and --”

James stopped suddenly, dropped his broom onto the floor, and bent down, lips puckered, so that she stepped into him, literally walked right into a kiss. She was so stunned by the impact that she dropped her wand and as it clattered to the stones covering the pathway, the magic ceased and the umbrella disappeared. His hands came up to her cheeks, the leather chaser’s fingerless gloves on his hands rough against her skin, his nose bumping her nose and the rain from his hair dripping over their faces as he tilted his head to one side, his lips moving against hers, warm and soft. His fingers moved down her neck to her shoulders as he kissed her, and she took a step closer and for a moment… just a moment… time sort of stopped, and he felt like the entire universe happened in that moment as Lily stepped closer to him and actually kissed him back.

When he pulled away, Lily stood there for a moment without moving, her eyes closed, holding onto the feeling even as the cold rain washed away the warmth from his mouth on hers.

“There,” James said, breathing quite hard, “I’ve taken my kiss back.”

Lily hesitated. Then, “That was not the kiss I stole from you, the one I took wasn’t - wasn’t like that. It was different, so you’ve just stolen that kiss from me - so… so you give it back!” and, excuse made, she stepped forward and grabbed onto his head, her fingers sweeping into his stringy wet hair, pulling him into her, and their lips pressing together again, this time his eyes widening in surprise for a moment before he melted back into her again.

When they broke apart a second time, James was the one that didn’t move at first and Lily stumbled backwards and stared up at him. “There,” she trembled. “Now we’re even.”

“No,” he said, tremulously, “You still owe me for the Library --” and he leaned forward and gave her a third kiss, this one brief, and he stepped back, looking at her. “There. Now we are even.”

Lily stared at him for a long moment then nodded, “Good. Very good. Even is good.” She bent down and grabbed her wand from the ground and ran up the path hurriedly, leaving James behind in the rain.

He stared after her, squinting through the rain, then held out his hand, “Up,” he commanded his broom and it shot up from the ground. He turned and hurried across the grounds, unsure what to think about what had just happened…




Sirius sat at the dinner table, casting glances across the Great Hall, watching as Severus Snape ate his dinner, scribbling notes in his Potions textbook hurriedly, ignoring the other Slytherins around him as they talked. Sirius could hear James Potter’s voice as he spoke excitedly - but he wasn’t paying attention, barely hearing what was being said. “Uh-huh…” he murmured, nodding absently, as he watched Snape.

“And so I says to her -- I said, ‘You could give it back' and she said, ‘What?’ and I said, ‘The kiss you stole, you could give it back’ and she said --- wait, Padfoot? Sirius?” James said, clicking his fingers, “Oi -- are you even listening?”

“Yeah… yeah, uh, sure… yeah.” Sirius nodded, “Quidditch practice, blah blah, lots of goals --”

Across the hall, Snape had closed his book, gotten up, and was leaving the Great Hall, following after Mulciber and McNair toward the entrance hall.

“Gotta go,” Sirius said, jumping up and rushing off.

James stared after him, aghast. He’d been in the middle of trying to tell Sirius about kissing Evans and he’d just gotten up and run off on him. He looked at Peter, “Did he tell you what he’s doing?”

Peter shook his head, “No. But don’t stop with your story! What happened next? DID she kiss you?”

James stared after Sirius who was gone out the door of the Hall, then looked at Peter again, “What?”

“Evans! Did she kiss you?!” Peter stared up at him, wanting to hear the end of the story.

“Oh.” James turned back to Peter, his mind still half on Sirius’s running off, “Yeah, actually. Yeah. She did.” And a grin spread across his face as the worry of what Sirius Black was up to melted off, fading back into his excitement over the kiss with Evans.




In the entrance hall, Sirius watched as Severus was standing about a few feet behind Mulciber and McNair as they were talking to some girl… Sirius took a deep breath, and thought very, very hard… rushing across the entrance hall as he did, dodging ‘round several students who were gathering about and purposely slammed into Severus Snape, knocking the textbook from his hand so that it fell to the floor, “Watch where you’re standing, you bleedin’ git,” Sirius grumbled, forcing the mental image of the whomping willow to the forefront of his mind, forcing the tunnel into his head, concentrating on the way the knot in the tree had to be struck by a rock and climbing into the tunnel… Nine o’clock, tomorrow, he thought, Meeting Potter tomorrow at nine o’clock --- meeting Potter tomorrow at nine o’clock…

Severus stood up, snapping the book from Sirius’s hand, “Give that to me, you --” Their fingers brushed when Severus took the book, and he paused, blinking as his hand tightened ‘round the book, yanking it away. He looked up at Sirius, who took that as his cue to hurriedly go on his way… shoving past Severus Snape and running as quickly as he could toward the stairs.

Severus stared after him.