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Itinerarium Maraudentium


James, Sirius, Peter, Remus, and Lily sat on the floor in the hall outside the hospital wing, waiting for someone to tell them whether Horace Slughorn was alright. Lily was crying into her arms, balanced upon her knees, her hair curtaining off the Marauders from seeing her face as she wept. James sat beside her, facing her, his hand on her back, wanting to do more to comfort her than just sit there awkwardly touching her spine like he was. Remus had a palm on her knee and Peter sat, still catching his breath from carrying all the cauldrons all the way up to the sixth floor corridor.

It had been nearly ten minutes of this before Sirius finally said, “Blimey, Evans, he’s going to be alright…”

Lily coughed on her tears.

James said, “Evans… it’s alright, in other words, you can stop crying.” He put her hand up on her far shoulder, his arm stretching ‘round her back as he leaned forward, softly using his other hand to lift up her hair and peek beneath. “Don’t worry baby.”

She had great blotches on her cheeks as she turned to look at him, her face still shielded from the other three. Her green eyes were clouded, and long wet tracks streaked her face. He looked so concerned. She turned and leaned into him, right into his chest, wrapping her arms about his neck, burying her face into the crook of his collar.

James’s eyes went quite wide as he looked over her shoulder at the other three boys. He had no idea what to do. Remus mouthed hug her and mimed putting his arms ‘round someone and Sirius reached over and grabbed James’s one hand that he could discreetly get a hold of and dragged it ‘round Lily so it was on the back of her hair and he grinned, nodding, and gave James a thumbs-up as James awkwardly brought his other hand ‘round to rest on her back.

“Oh James, you have no idea,” Lily cried.

He looked to Remus, eyes searching, panicked.

Remus nodded encouragingly.

“What’s… what’s wrong, Evans?” James asked in a wobbly voice, “I’ll make it better if I can.”

“I was talking to Sev,” Lily cried, pausing because her voice caught in her throat.

“That’d make me cry, too,” said Peter non-helpfully.

“Shut up, Wormtail,” snapped Sirius.

Peter’s face burned.

“What about, love?” James asked, focusing on Lily, barely hearing Peter and Sirius’s words at all, his eyes met with Remus’s, who was looking just as concerned as he felt.

“About you, really,” Lily cried, “About our date.”

James’s brain whirled dangerously and he had to bite back a smile. She called it a date. SHE CALLED IT A BLOODY DATE. Oh Godric. Focus, Potter. This isn’t the time to be freaking out. Oh Godric, though. She called it a date. His voice came out thick. “The one we’re going on in just twelve more days?” he asked quietly.

“Yes,” she sniffled into his neck.

Oh Godric. A date. A date with Lily Evans. Hullo, I’m James Potter and I have a date with Lily Evans. He decided then and there that he would introduce himself to everyone he met for all of eternity that way.

“He used to be my best friend, James, I don’t understand, I don’t -- I don’t understand why he can’t be happy for me, why he’s -- he’s so --” Lily’s tears were hot as they soaked his oxford.

James didn’t know how to reply, so he just kept on stroking her hair.

“Then Mulciber and Avery and McNair came and -- and, it was so awful…”

Sirius hissed, “Bloody bastards, what did they want?”

“They tried to -- they had me cornered -- like Mary Macdonald -- and --”

James stiffened, anger in his veins.

So did the other three. Even Remus’s eyes flashed.

“I’ll fucking kill them,” Sirius announced, getting up.

Remus grabbed his wrist, “Sirius.”

“No! I’ll fucking destroy them! They don’t touch our sister!!” Sirius’s face was purple with rage.

“Did they?” James pulled her back from him, inspecting her, his eyes wide with concern as he looked at her cardigan buttons to be sure they were all in place and her oxford and her tie, and, nervously, his eyes drifted down to her skirt and then back up to her eyes, “Did they hurt you?”

“No, didn’t have a chance, I hexed Mulciber and I ran into Slughorn’s office.”

Peter looked up to see if that had calmed Sirius down at all, but Sirius’s eyes still burned with rage. “Nothing happened,” Peter said, reiterating incase Sirius hadn’t heard.

“The intention is enough. I’ll bloody murder the lot of them.”

James looked up at Sirius, “Sit.”

Sirius glowered, but he sat, Remus still clutching his wrist to keep him from going anywhere - like a leash. Sirius’s jaw was set tight, teeth clenched, fist flexing ‘round his wand handle...

James looked back to Lily. “You’re sure they didn’t hurt you?”

“They broke my heart,” Lily replied, “But other than that…”

James felt his own heart break at this. He shook his head and pulled her back into him as she started crying all over again and he put his hand over her hair once again and rested his cheek against the side of his head.

Sirius’s hands were shaking with anger. “Dumbledore best fucking do something about this,” he seethed.




Sirius’s anger was echoed in the reaction that Frank Longbottom, Ali Prewitt, and Andy Woodhouse all had when they heard what had happened as well. Frank had to be physically stopped to keep him from going over to the Slytherin table at dinner that evening in the Great Hall when Lily told them in a shaking voice about what had happened - mainly to clear up a rumor that was spreading through the castle that Horace Slughorn had died.

He hadn’t died, of course. It was a seizing spell he’d caught in the heart and it had been a horrible thing but Madam Pomfrey had assured them that their Potions professor would be back on his feet before their next class, she had mended him up, and he was recovering and already complaining that she would give him no oak matured mead.

“Dunno why they’re even still here in the castle,” Sirius hissed, glowering across the Great Hall, his eyes narrowed as he watched Mulciber talking to his friends, laughing cruelly about whatever they were talking about. Sirius’s mouth was contorted in a way that reminded Peter a bit of an angry dog, his teeth bared as his lips quivered with the force of the sneer.

Remus had dark circles beneath his eyes and was trying not to breathe through his nose for the smell of the dinner was turning his stomach horribly - but he hadn’t wanted to be alone in the dormitory, either. He rubbed his knees beneath the table, fighting a losing battle against the shooting pains that ran up and down his bony legs. “You need to tell Dumbledore, Lily,” he said ‘round the pain. “Until somebody tells Dumbledore, they aren’t going anywhere. It’s all just rumors and tales.”

Lily flushed. “I don’t want to tell Dumbledore.”

“I’ll kill them, that’ll get them out of here,” Sirius murmured.

“I’ll help,” Frank agreed.

“Bloody hell.” Remus looked between them, “It’s not going to help if you two get expelled for attacking them. And that’s what it would look like if you killed them.”

“Worth it,” Frank said flatly.

Ali was hugging Lily from the side and Lily poked at her food. “It’s going to be okay, Lil,” she said quietly.

“I’d like to hex all their cocks clean off their bodies,” Sirius murmured.

“Sirius Black!” Remus looked up at the language as Peter choked on a mouthful of rice.

“YES!” Frank said.

“Cure their need for being perverted bastards right quick.” Sirius looked at Frank, “Think there’s a hex like that?”

“Cockus deleteus,” Frank joked.

“Frank, really,” Ali hissed, flushing.

James was smirking. “Neuterus maximus.”

“No, mate, maximus sounds like they have something there to brag about. We all know their peens are small… more like Neuterus minimus!”

“Microscopia dissectus!” snickered James.

“Or,” Peter said, lifting his fork with a bit of roast on the end, “You could just blow up the whole table.”

They all looked at him.

“The Filibusters from third year are still there,” he said.

Sirius’s eyes widened.

Remus started shaking his head, “Guys - no -- guys -- bad idea --”

But before he could even finish trying to talk them out of it… Sirius and Frank had looked at one another, grinned, and, in unison, they’d stood up, drawn their wands, aimed across the hall at the Slytherin table, and together said --

“Ignitus.”

“Oh Godric.” Remus covered his eyes.

Lily and Ali turned in their seats, terrified yet intrigued, and James bit his lips as Peter dropped his fork with a clatter.

Across the hall, there was a quiet crack, so soft that nobody really noticed - save for Alabaster Jackson, who leaned down and looked under the table, investigating… His eyes widened, “Mother of Merlin!” he exclaimed and he jumped up, fleeing from the table.

There was a series of hissings as the ignition spark moved from pyre to pyre beneath the table, running down the center through the network of firecrackers the boys had stuck to the bottom of the wood. The hissing got louder and louder until all of the Filibusters were lit and the students around the table were starting to get suspicious, looking about, confused expression on their faces, and then…

BOOM!

There was the first firecracker set off. It sparked out from beneath the table, curling through the air with a wild shrieking whistle sound and the heads of every student at the table turned to look upon it. Mulciber leaned down and looked under and saw the network of firecrackers, all lit, and several about to blow.

“RUN!” he yelled and they jumped up, nearly all in unison - McNair tripping over Avery’s book bag and falling into Dimitri Goyle, who shouted as he scrambled, trying to get away. Barty Crouch Jr. cried out in shock as Grant Crabbe shoved him aside trying to bolt and Regulus Black stumbled backward into the wall as the mayhem erupted, eyes wide, as the table began to explode into shocking bursts of colour and sound that echoed ‘round the entire Great Hall. Hufflepuffs ducked aside as Filibusters that managed to escape their permanent sticking charms shot out from under the table, the benches bursting, food flying everywhere as the table broke apart beneath the pressure of the Filibusters exploding beneath it, breaking the stone floor.

Sirius and Frank high-fived as the last of the Filibusters whistled and spiraled through the air into the sky, exploding in a great golden lion over the remains of the Slytherin house table, the students all piled and jumbled and shaking in great clumps about the far end of the Hall.

At the staff table, Dumbledore had stood up and McGonagall was staring, her jaw dropped at the sight of the exploding table. Flitwick was hurrying forward, his wand spraying water, to douse the fire that was starting to engulf the table cloth and bits of charred broken wood. Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws were swiveling about, turning to see what happened, their faces wide with perplexed, questioning expressions…

Sirius climbed up on the bench of the Gryffindor table. “LAY A FINGER ON ANY MUGGLE BORN IN THIS CASTLE AGAIN AND WE’LL USE THE COCKUS DELETUS ON YOUR SORRY ARSE, MULCIBER! MARAUDERS FOREVER!!!” He held up his fist in the air. “ITINERARIUM MARAUDENTIUM!”

And slowly… as people realized what had happened, and the words that Sirius shouted sunk in... starting with just one and then spreading, gaining momentum... the muggle-borns were clapping their hands and cheering.