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The ride to the hospital went by in a blur. Kevin tried to stay out of the medics way but refused to let go of Nick's hand and move to the back of the ambulance. They worked around him, getting an iv placed and constantly taking Nick's blood pressure. Kevin couldn't decipher the words they spoke to each other, his eyes and attention focused solely on the man lying on the stretcher before him. The man who still hadn't woken up. Nick's normally tanned golden skin was white and clammy. His hair was matted to one side where he had sweat so much rehearsing. Kevin wanted desperately to reach out and run his fingers through it, to provide some semblance of comfort to the other man but he was too scared to move. They got to the hospital in record time but it still felt like hours to Kevin. He hesitantly released Nick's hand, but not before kissing it gently and laying it back at his side.


The EMT directed Kevin where to stand so they could lift Nick out of the ambulance. He waited in the back until they successfully had the stretcher on the ground and then he clambered out behind them. They moved quickly, Kevin trying desperately to keep up. His feet could only move so fast and the fear he felt was so strong it felt like he himself was having difficulty breathing.


Once inside the emergency room room they were met by a flood of nurses and a doctor. Kevin advised them they would need additional security and was led to the nurses station to begin filling out paperwork. He tried to fight them, tried to push back against the reassuring arm of an elderly nurse but she held him strong, advising him that the best thing he could do for his friend right then was to come with her. Feeling like a bucket of ice water had been thrown on top of him he turned and flared at her.


"He's not my friend, he's my husband."


She gave him a smile and nodded. "All the more reason to come with me. Allow the doctor time and space to work. I'll keep you plenty occupied while you're waiting."


Kevin stood in the hallway watching the swinging doors as they wheeled Nick away from him. He felt the wail bubbling up from the pit of his stomach. If the nurse hadn't been standing there he surely would have hit the floor. She caught him as his knees gave way and gently half drug him down the hallway. Once they reached the nurses station she opened the employee guard rail and pushed him inside. She grabbed an office chair and wheeled it over close enough so she could push him down in it. He fell into it ungracefully. He dropped his head in his hands as the tears continued to fall. She stood beside him, safe and grandmotherly as she rubbed his back. When he could finally catch his breath he looked up at her with the smallest of smiles. Grabbing her hand and squeezing it he shook himself.


"I think I'm okay now. What do you need me to do?"


She nodded and smiled as she busied herself gathering the necessary admitting forms that needed to be signed. She grabbed a clipboard and an ink pen and passed it all to him to begin filling out. Once Kevin was settled she went to work calling the hospital security team to get a protocol started for how to deal with Nick's room and admittance. Kevin tried hard to focus on the paperwork but every time he put the pen to the paper he saw Nick crumpling over and over in his mind. They were just getting started, just getting somewhere together. He couldn't lose him now.


A flurry of noise coming from the front door erupted in the small waiting area. He knew without even looking up the other guys had arrived. In seconds his suspicions were confirmed when they appeared at the nurses station. Taking one look at Kevin, Brian demanded to be let in. The elderly nurse nodded and opened the door allowing Brian to enter. He was beside Kevin in seconds, folding the other man into his arms. A fresh round of tears started and Kevin clung to Brian, afraid to let go of the contact.


"I've got an extra room set up for you guys to convene in there to wait for the doctor. That way you're out of my way and out of everyone's sight. If you'll all follow me."


Kevin stood on shaky legs and followed the nurse and the rest of the guys down the hall, cradling the clipboard of paperwork to his chest as he shuffled along. Once they were alone in the room the nurse turned and smiled. "Doctors in with him now. It should only be a little while longer." she started out the door before turning back and addressing the other men in the room. "Someone else fill out that paperwork for him. He's such a mess at the moment he may end up getting his own room here if he's not careful."


She turned and left the room, leaving a dumbfounded Kevin in her wake. It was true, he was a little ashamed of himself. He was always the one that could keep everything together for everyone and everything moving forward. But right now, without knowing what was wrong with Nick the fear and anxiety were too much for him to handle. He'd never been this scared. Even when he lost his dad, he hadn't known what was happening in enough time to be scared about it. Devastated after the fact sure, but he never went through the terror part. He made a mental note to send something nice to his mother for taking the brunt of that fear and shielding him from it.


He felt the clipboard being pried out of his hands and looked up to see Brian's small smile. He released it and glanced around the room at the other two. Howie looked pensive, arms crossed across his chest as he leaned against the wall and AJ. Well AJ looked down right terrified. He kept pacing quickly from one end of the room to the other, muttering to himself and throwing his hands up every so often. He smiled to himself knowing how Nick would love to know how big of an effect he had on the other members of their group. Nick. All Kevin could think of was how mere hours earlier they'd showered together. Soaping, kissing and exploring parts of each that until that moment had been forbidden to each other. How had this day changed so drastically. They were supposed to perform tonight. Kevin sat up with a start. There was just no way.


"Did someone call management? Tell them we can't perform tonight?" Kevin asked looking up at the others.


They all exchanged looks before Brian spoke. "Not yet, we weren't sure what was going on with Nick yet. There's still tim…"


Kevin cut him off. "Someone better fucking call them. We're not performing tonight. End of discussion."


Howie glanced at the others before pushing himself off the wall. "Kev," he started.


Kevin shot up from the chair, almost knocking Brian to the floor in the process. "I don't give a shit about anything else right now Howard. We're not performing. No matter what the doctor says he's getting rest tonight. We'll play it by ear for tomorrow, but tonight is a done deal. So I would really appreciate it if you would call and tell them Nick's in the FUCKING hospital and there's not going to be a show."


No one spoke. They all glanced at each other before glancing back at Kevin. Eyes were wide and mouths slack. Kevin never canceled anything unless it was a life or death emergency, the show had to go on was always his motto. They had assumed this would be no different. The show wasn't scheduled for several more hours and by that time they could be fine and ready to go. No one could have predicted Kevin's vehement reaction. Howie held up his hands in surrender and then dug his phone out of his pocket. Leaving the room he cast one last wide eyed glance at Brian who merely shrugged his shoulders.


Feeling a little sick from his outburst, Kevin lowered himself back down in the chair and dropped his head in his hands. This waiting was driving him insane. He had to know if Nick was okay. Time seemed to stretch on indefinitely. AJ continued to pace while Brian made quick work of the hospital forms. Howie returned with a nod, letting them all know that management was taking care of the things necessary to cancel their concert. Kevin could care less on that front. How could anyone think of performing after the day they’d had. His own heart was pounding much quicker than it normally did, causing a dull throbbing in his chest. If the doctor didn’t come back soon he was going to come out of his skin.


They all jumped when they heard a noise at the door. They watched as the doctor stepped inside, his face unreadable. Kevin was on his feet in seconds. “How is he? Is he awake?”


The doctor held up his hand and glanced down at the chart he was holding. “Who is Mr. Carter’s next of kin?”


Kevin stepped forward. “I am, I’m his husband. Please tell me what’s going on.”


The doctor looked at Kevin curiously before sliding his gaze over to the other men standing beside him. Brian gave a slight nod in agreement. He sighed and folded his arms. ‘Mr Carter is resting. He did wake up a little while ago. “


“What’s the matter with him? Why did he pass out again?” Kevin asked, the panic high in his voice.


The doctor looked up at him curiously. “How many times has he fainted?”


“This would be the third time in a few days.” Brain said stepping up and placing a hand on Kevin’s arm.


The doctor frowned and glanced back down at the chart. Kevin felt his heart lurch. Suddenly he couldn’t wait one more second to know what was going on. “What’s going on?” he asked again, a little more forcefully this time.


The doctor gave him a look of impatience but cleared his throat and responded. “Mr. Carter was brought in severely dehydrated. The level of dehydration is what caused him to pass out. In giving him IVs to try to rouse him we took some blood. The lab results came back a little while ago and Mr. Carter is severely anemic. I believe his anemia is what is causing these fainting spells. The IV fluids weren’t enough to wake him on their own so we had to give him a blood transfusion. He woke briefly but has been asleep for some time now. He will be fine, but he needs to start an iron supplement right away and make an appointment with his own doctor. Anemia is nothing to mess with and it needs to be tested regularly.”


Kevin felt a weight leave his shoulders. Nick was going to be okay. Anemia was something they could deal with. He was thankful it wasn’t something more serious. He wanted to hug this doctor. But first, he wanted to see Nick. Touch him, kiss him, look into those beautiful crystal blue eyes. His thoughts were interrupted by AJ clearing his throat.


“I have a confession to make.”


All eyes turned towards him. Kevin looked at him curiously. This was not the time or place for whatever nonsense AJ wanted to talk about right then. Especially not while they were with the doctor. AJ refused to meet their eyes, hands shoved deep in his jeans pocket as he toed a spot of dirt on the hospital room floor.


“Three nights ago I spiked Nick’s drink with ecstasy.. The next morning is when the first episode of passing out happened.”


Kevin felt his heart thud in his chest as a rage like he’d never experienced before spread through his veins. “You did WHAT?” he boomed, taking two steps toward the smaller man. Brain shot out and stood in front of him, blocking his past.


“Stop Kev. Take a deep breath.” Brain said as he placed a hand on Kevin’s chest.


“You’d better move Brian or I’ll kill you too once I’m done with him.” Kevin snarled, gesturing to AJ. AJ’s eyes were wide as he stared down Kevin. Knowing he would most definitely deserve whatever the other man threw at him he tried to stand his ground.


The doctor shook his head, obviously over their theatrics. “To answer your question, yes. The drug more than likely contributed to dehydrating Mr. Carter too much too quickly. However, had he not had these fainting spells it's uncertain how soon the anemia would have been discovered and that is the most important thing. We have to get the iron levels in his blood lined out before it can cause further damage. But please, don’t go around drugging anymore of your friends. Now Mr…” the doctor gestured to Kevin.


“Richardson. It’s Kevin Richardson.” Kevin said momentarily forgetting the need to kill his younger band mate.


“Very well, if you’d like to come with me, I will show you to Mr. Carter’s room. Like I’ve said he is still asleep and we expect him to wake on his own.” With that, the doctor held the door open for Kevin and led him out of the room.


--


AJ knew he was in for it the moment the hotel door closed. Before he knew what happened he was slammed backwards against the wall, Brian’s hand around his throat.


“What the FUCK were you thinking?” Brian spit out, his blue eyes wild in fury.


Brian never said fuck. AJ slunk down further on the wall. He’d known he’d messed up and knew he had to face the consequences. “I’m sorry. I..I. was trying to get them to talk. I thought if I could get them both loose and leave them with each other maybe they could work this shit out. I’m tired of dealing with it. It’s been years of this bull shit. I had no fucking idea they would go and get hitched. How was I supposed to see that one coming.”


The pressure on his neck grew more intense and he squeezed his eyes shut thinking at any moment Brian would haul back and punch him right in the face. “You’re not supposed to fucking drug your friends for starters.” Brian pushed AJ’s thoar back against the wall before releasing him completely.


“I need to be away from you right now before I do some serious harm to that pretty face of yours.” Brian walked to the door and with a glare over his shoulder he slammed it.


--


Kevin wasn’t sure what to expect when he stepped inside Nick’s room. He’d heard the words the doctor had said, IV, blood transfusion, still asleep, but seeing his beautiful husband stretched out on the bed with tubes and wires going every which way made his stomach lurch. He quickly grabbed the hard plastic visitor chair and drug it over to Nick’s bedside. Perching down in it he gingerly picked up one of Nick’s still hands. He felt cold and clammy at the same time. He raised the hand to his lips and gently kissed the back of it. He wanted nothing more than to scoop the other man into his arms and run away with him, never letting another soul near enough to touch, let alone hurt him. He was furious, no scratch that, he was whatever came after furious with AJ. He’d spiked their drinks, gotten them both so high they were out of their minds and let their inhibitions take over and then he’d left them to their own devices. He tried to listen to the doctor and convince himself this truly was a blessing in disguise otherwise they would have found Nick’s blood issue, but at the same time he wanted to rip off AJ’s head. He was conflicted and scared and all he wanted was for Nick to open his eyes so he knew they would be okay. Sitting in the chair was too far. He needed to be closer. He stood and examined the bed before moving Nick’s arm and the nurse’s call button. Carving out a small area for himself he perched on Nick’s bed up by his chest, as close as he was going to get in Nick’s current state. He began softly stroking his hair. Brushing the golden strands off that beautiful face he loves so much. When that wasn’t enough he began to palm Nick’s cheek, loving the feeling of the soft flesh beneath his fingers. He traced the line of his jaw and ran his fingertips across those plush wonderful lips. He didn’t even think about how it would look, just dropped his head lower, brushing his lips across Nick’s still ones.


“Come on baby, wake up for me. Show me those beautiful blue eyes of yours.”


Still nothing. Kevin tried not to let it dissuade him. He shifted again so she could lay his head on Nick’s chest, calming only slightly when he could hear the soft lub dub of Nick’s heart beating beneath him. He began whispering words of love to the blonde. Telling him all the places he’d like to take him and all the things he wanted to do. He told Nick stories about how many times he’d fallen in love with him over the years and how he couldn’t wait to spend the rest of his life with him. He chattered on, afraid if he stopped he’d be left with nothing but the beeping machines and silence of the room. Just when he felt his eyes drifting and thought he’d said everything he could, he felt slim fingers brush through his hair. It was the most magical feeling Kevin had ever felt. He startled slightly and shifted carefully as to not disturb or hurt Nick in any way. Turning his eyes finally landed on those beautiful blue orbs he loved so much..


“You’re awake.” he said softly, his voice breaking.


“You’re here.” Nick said just as soft. He coughed a couple of times and Kevin reached for the water cup and helped him take a drink before settling it back down on the nightstand.


“Of course I’m here baby. I wouldn’t be anywhere else.” Kevin leaned down and brushed his lips against Nick’s again, sighing contentedly when Nick kissed him back, just as sweet.


“They are going to talk if they find you in here like this.” Nick whispered as Kevin rested his forehead against the blondes.


“So? I need you. I need to know you’re okay. I’ve never been that scared, Nicky. I caught you right before you hit the floor and I swear I screamed so loud that if they weren't talking before they are now. I’ve been kind of a basket case since we got here.” Kevin said sheepishly.


Nick offered up a small smile. “I’m okay baby. Just please, don’t leave me here okay. Will you stay with me?”


Kevin could deny him nothing. He shifted his mouth forward and brushed his lips against Nick’s. “They will have to pry me away from you baby.”