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AN: Wow... it's been a year since i've updated this story. Don't worry i haven't forgotten it, it's just been put on the back burner for awhile... a long while. But thank you everyone who kept me thinking about it. I hope there are those of you out there who still want to read this!

Kevin rolled his eyes.

“Oh please. The fact of the matter is, is that she left. She couldn’t handle being with Howie anymore so she left. She probably didn’t think that she deserved him, and this just proves that she didn’t. You deserve a woman, Howie. Not a girl.” Kevin said.

Howie looked at him funny.

“Kevin maybe you should go. You obviously never liked her, and you’re not helping. At all.” Aj said.

“Yeah Kev, maybe you should.” Brian agreed.

“Fine, I’m out of here.” Kevin said exasperatedly. “You all know I’m right.” He yelled to them on his way out the door.

“Don’t listen to him, Howie. I don’t know what his problem is.” Nick said. “You alright?” he asked after not getting a response from Howie.

Howie nodded. “Yeah… it was just… he said something… never mind.” He answered shaking his head to clear his thoughts.

The thought that something could be seriously wrong made Howie anxious. He felt the need to do something. But he didn’t know what. The notion of Tori possibly being hurt and scared somewhere made him sick to his stomach. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath to calm himself.

‘Don’t think like that’ he thought to himself. ‘Think of happier times, and how happy you’ll be once you find her.’ Chanting that to himself over and over again in his head comforted him and brought forward memories of their time together.

He closed his eyes and his mind drifted back to the night she graduated. The night everything between them changed.

~*~ May 10, 2002: 9:30 pm~*~

He glanced at her again from the corner of his eye. She looked incredible, wearing a beautiful white dress that clung to her in all the right places. Despite her age, everything else about her suggested that she was a woman of beauty, strength and grace. He couldn’t believe he was here finally; ready to express his feelings for her.

Howie focused on the road once again, before she caught him staring at her for the third time since he’d picked her up.

She looked over at him and smiled knowingly. She took his fidgeting hand softly in hers and laced their fingers together. He smiled and brought their hands to him and kissed the back of her hand softly. He swore his heart skipped a beat when she smiled at him so lovingly.

They finally reached their destination a few minutes later. Tori looked out the window and smiled when she saw that they were at the beach by his house. He got out and opened the door for her and held his hand out to help her from the car. Holding her hand still, he walked her down the beach to where he had a blanket laid out complete with candles and a picnic basket.

“I know you probably had enough to eat from the parties you went to today… but I thought a little dessert couldn’t hurt.” Howie said as he helped her to sit on the blanket with him.

She smiled as she settled between his legs and leaned back against him. “Ok” she said softly while he wrapped his arms around her.

“What’s on your mind D?” she asked softly after a moment of silence passed between them? “Is something wrong?”

“No, no, nothing’s wrong T.” he said gently. “I’ve just got a lot on my mind lately, that’s all.”

“Oh. Well what is it? You’re nervous or anxious about something…”

Howie smiled. “How do you figure that?” he asked while gently beginning to move his thumb in circles around her navel.

She shivered and licked her lips unconsciously at his tender ministrations. “I-I know you Howie. Something’s up, now spill.”

He sighed softly and turned her slightly so he could look in her eyes when he spoke. “T… Tori… you came into my life at a time when I thought that nothing and no one could ever reach me. Yet you did, so easily with just one simple letter. With that one letter you’ve brought joy, fun, understanding, appreciation for everything in life, and…”

“And what?” she asked softly when he paused.

He took a deep breath and looked into her eyes. “…And love.” He whispered softly to her. He looked down at once. “I know that what I’m saying, and what I’m proposing is crazy. I know that we have odds stacked against us for even being friends the way we are now, and that becoming something more than that would be insanely hard. I just needed you to know how I feel because I can’t hide it anymore, and I can’t li-“ He stopped suddenly and looked up at her questioningly.

She smiled warmly at him and took the fingers that stopped his rambling away from his lips. She then tenderly replaced her fingers, with her own lips.

~*~

That night remained so vividly in his memory, he could almost smell the sea air mixed with the scent of her perfume. He could almost feel the course sand beneath them as his hands wandered over her delicate skin. He could almost hear her whispered words… telling him of her love for him.

He opened his eyes and looked at his three remaining friends with determination they’d never seen before.

“I’m going to find her.”