Kevin groaned as he hauled himself into his wheelchair and pushed himself out of his hospital room door. It was two months later, and it was finally the day that he’d been waiting for for so long. He was checking out. But he wasn’t happy. If anything, he was disappointed in himself and discouraged. His goal was to be walking out of the hospital. Instead, other than gaining some muscle, he wasn’t any better off than he’d been when he had come in. The only thing he could really do for himself was get in and out of his chair. To him, his limited capabilities were pathetic. His friends, on the other hand, thought that what he could do was great.
“So, are you excited about going back home to Florida?” Anna asked, walking beside him.
Kevin grunted in response. His house wasn’t exactly handicap accessible. That’s all he thought of himself as. A handicap freak. He had no idea how he was going to get around. It would be a near impossible task. He’d even had to swallow his pride and ask Anna the favor of moving in with him to help him out and around. She had willingly agreed without any hesitation. Kevin was thankful for that. Jaime was moving in with A.J and Stephanie with Nick anyway. They’d all arrived back to their home state the night before. Anna was the only one left in Virginia to be with Kevin and lend him a hand. He had attempted to ask Anna out on several occasions over the past few months, but she could see in his eyes that he still missed Kristin, although every day there was less and less longing in them. She knew that it wouldn’t be too much longer until they were dating. Anna was getting anxious for that moment to come.
“What’s wrong?” Anna asked him, sensing that he wasn’t as happy as he should be. He was leaving the hospital. She figured that that would be enough to better anybody’s mood.
“I didn’t meet my personal expectations for myself,” Kevin muttered, “Not even close to reaching my damned goal.”
“Which was?” Anna questioned. He hadn’t told anybody what, exactly, his goals were by the time he was released.
Kevin paused. He knew that he was being unreasonable, but months ago, he could do anything he wanted if he had put his mind to it. They had since reached the car that the Boys had bought for Anna. A little bright red two door civic. They’d bought Stephanie a green Mercedes and Jaime a black Eclipse. She opened the door on the passenger side for him.
“To walk out of here,” he replied softly.
Anna tried not to laugh at his expectations for himself as she watched Kevin lift himself out of his wheelchair and into the car, but couldn’t help but chuckle a little. She shut the door and walked around, climbing into the drivers seat and starting the car up. The laughter died down quickly though when she saw the way Kevin was glaring at her with his vibrant green eyes. Anna had to admit that their once bright color was dulling along with the depression that he was sinking into more and more with each day that passed.
“Kev, its only been two months. The doctor said at least six.”
“I know,” he grumbled, “Can’t blame me for hoping.” Anna sighed. She hated seeing him like this. She couldn’t say that she wasn’t used to it because she’d known Kevin for a full two days before the accident had even happened. In those two days, he hadn’t exactly been himself either. She didn’t know what the real Kevin was like. All she had was what the other guys had told her. He was fun to be around, but serious. He was mature, strong and positive, never giving up on anything. She had yet to see him be any one of those characteristics.
“Are you going to call that therapist that the doctor referred you to when we get back?” Anna asked.
Kevin just shrugged. To be honest, he wasn’t sure if he would or not. Since his two months of therapy hadn’t done much good anyway, he didn’t know what the point in it would be. He was about to just give up. It would be easier that way instead of struggling to improve and be disappointed by false hope.
“Kev,” Anna said, “Remember what the doctor said if you didn’t continue with it right away.”
“What are you,” Kevin snapped, whipping his head to the side to look at her, “My fucking mother?”
Anna decided not to take his comment to heart. She knew that he was going through a rough time at the moment. She merged onto the highway knowing that they had a long drive ahead of them.
“I’m sorry I yelled,” Kevin apologized after a few moments, “Just frustrated.”
“I know,” she replied.
Kevin said nothing and neither did Anna. She wasn’t sure what to say to him. He was vulnerable and anything she said could and might be the wrong thing. She didn’t need to upset him any more. He didn’t need the extra stress on him. Kevin was deep in thought wondering what his life had come to. It was if his mind had overtaken a foreign body that he was still getting used to. Ten minutes went by and neither had said a thing.
“I just don’t feel like it will do me any good.” He said out of nowhere, “If it hasn’t yet, why would it start?”
“What won’t?” Anna asked him, taking her eyes off of the road for a moment to look at him. He was still gorgeous, “What are you talking about?”
“Therapy,” he replied simply.
“You’ll never know unless you try,” Anna told him, “Would you rather try and possibly fail, or not try and never know?”
Kevin considered her point. It was actually really logical. He remembered when he used to be logical. Now, he didn’t think he knew how to be anymore. It scared him to know that Nick had more logic and reasoning than he did now. He never thought that the day would come when that happened.
“I guess I’ll give him a call tomorrow morning,” Kevin replied, “I’d hate to go backwards and reverse everything that I’d worked for.” He snorted a little at that because he knew that there wouldn’t be much to reverse. He looked over and saw Anna smiling.
He couldn’t help but smile too, something that he hadn’t done in weeks. It felt awkward, but good. With Anna’s encouragement and motavation, he knew that he couldn’t give up and let her down. Especially if he wanted to keep the odds in his favor for them dating. She deserved someone who tried, not a quitter. He’d already disappointed himself. There was no need to disappoint her, along with all of his other friends, as well.
Jaime walked into the restaurant-sized kitchen at her new home and rummaged through the fridge looking for something to eat. It was her first full day in the mansion and she was still getting accustomed to where things were. One thing was for sure: the kitchen was the first place she’d learned to locate. With the way her appetite was lately, she couldn’t live without knowing how to get there from every corner of the house.
“Hey babe,” A.J. said, coming into the room and wrapping his arms around her waste, kissing her on the back of the neck. Jaime squirmed but his kisses felt good to her, “Looking for food again?”
“I’m hungry,” Jaime pouted, “Leave me alone.”
A.J. laughed at her getting grumpy over food but his eyes widened as she pulled out half of a chicken and three fourths of an apple pie. Setting it on the table, she pulled a fork out of a drawer and three asprin out of the Advil jar that was in another. She walked back to the fridge, grabbing a can of diet coke and sat down to devour her afternoon snack.
“Are you all right?” A.J. asked her with concern, sitting down at the table next to her. She nodded her head as she took a large bite of pie.
“Yeah,” she replied.
“You’ve been like this for a month. Always taking asprin, eating us out of house and home,” he joked.
Jaime looked up and scowled at him, “I’m fine,” she snapped, “I just don’t feel good lately.”
“Moody as all hell,” A.J. laughed
“I’m probably about to get my period,” she told him, “I’m about due.”
“You were two months ago and a month ago too,” he reminded her, “Should I make you a doctors appointment?”
Jaime shook her head, tearing off a piece of chicken from a leg. A.J. watched her in amusement. In all his life, he had never seen a girl attack food like that. She reminded him of a hungry wolf.
“This is normal for me,” she told him.
A.J’s eyes widened as he watched her pick the bones clean off of the chicken and practically lick the last crumbs off of the plate that the pie had been on.
“I’ll remember to thank my mom for bringing us dinner,” he laughed, knowing that his mother had stopped by before they’d arrived home to drop off some fresh groceries.
“Drop the sarcasm,” Jaime almost yelled, “You’re making me feel fat.”
A.J. choked a laugh back. Jaime was as far from fat as they came without looking unhealthy. She had the perfect body and curve.
“Baby,” he said, “I’m calling the doctor now. I think that it would be a good idea if you went.”
A.J. held up a finger, a stern look on his face to stop her from arguing. It didn’t matter how much she tried to protest. He wasn’t going to cave in and tell her that he would drop it.
“Even if being irregular is normal for you, it wouldn’t hurt to see what’s up with that, in the very least.”
Jaime rolled her eyes. She was in a grumpy mood and didn’t feel like arguing with her boyfriend. It would end badly in her screaming at him. She didn’t want him to ever see that side of her.
“If I agree, then will you leave me alone?” she finally asked him and A.J. nodded, picking her plates up and putting them into the dishwasher.
“Ok then, call the damned doctor and lets get it over with.” She told him, “It’s a waste of time though because nothing is wrong with me other than the usual.”
A.J. smiled at her triumphantly and kissed her on the lips before walking to the phone and calling his physician. Jaime sighed, drumming her fingers on the table. She rolled her eyes as she listened to A.J. talking to a receptionist about her. By the sounds of it, her appointment was for later that day. She could hardly contain her excitement.
“Home sweet home,” Anna called out, taking the house key from Kevin and unlocking the door, swinging it open.
Kevin raised an eyebrow as he sat looking up at his front door. After the near fifteen hour car ride, all he wanted to do was lye in his own bed in his own bedroom. He was already facing obsticals though and he wasn’t even inside the house yet.
“How the hell do you suppose I am going to get up those three steps?” he asked and he saw Anna’s face scrunch up, deep in thought.
“Do you have, like, a large piece of wood?”
“Huh?” Kevin asked, wondering what exactly she meant by “wood”
“A board,” Anna answered, being more specific with her choice of words.
Kevin shrugged, “I don’t know. Go inside the house and to the garage and see. The kitchen is straight through to the back and to the left. The garage is the door next to the stove.”
Anna ventured into his house to go into the garage and search for the hardware that she was looking for. Kevin waited, knowing that his life was going to be hard for the next few months. He wondered if he should sell his house for first floor apartment. It would definitely be easier for him. The alternative would be installing an elevator somewhere in his house. The problem with that was, he didn’t know where it would be put. Minutes later, Anna came through the door carrying a large board in her arms, struggling with it against her small frame.
“What are you going to do with that?” Kevin asked her.
Anna rolled her eyes. Were men always this clueless? Could he not see what her plan was? She placed one end of the board on the platform at the top of the steps and the other end on the ground.
“Now roll yourself up the ramp,” Anna commanded.
“That board is no more than a quarter inch thick,” Kevin protested, “It’ll snap beneath me.”
Anna shook her head, knowing that it wouldn’t, “Just try,” she convinced him, “You’ll be that much closer to being in your home.”
That was all it took for Kevin. He, with a slight hesitation, began to wheel himself up the ramp. In less than a minute, he was at the top with Anna, unharmed. Anna could see him breath a sigh of relief. But it was soon replaced with a look of concern. He had another challenge.
“I suppose you’re going to use the same idea to get me inside the house?” Kevin asked, knowing that it wouldn’t be quite so easy with the limited space which he had.
Anna nodded, placing the board part way on the platform. The other end was sticking up in the air inside the house, “Trust me.” She said when she saw the look that Kevin was giving her, “If you ever want us to be in a relationship, you’re going to have to trust my judgement. I’d never have you do anything that would hurt you in any way.”
Kevin knew that she was right. He had to trust her judgement. If he were well again, he knew that he would find her solutions well reasoned. Kevin started to go up the ramp once again and as he went up, the other end went down, leading him safely inside his home.
“Thank god that’s over with,” Kevin said after Anna was inside as well, and the door was shut, “I don’t think I’ll be leaving my house very often.”
Anna chuckled a little. She didn’t blame him. It would be a pain to have to go through that every time he left the place.
“As brilliant as your idea was,” Kevin began, “How will I get to my room?” he finished.
He could almost feel the comfort of his very own bed at that moment. He longed to be asleep in it.
“Um, until we figure out the alternative, I don’t think that will be happening. Do you have like, a guest room down here?”
Kevin nodded, not thrilled with the idea, but knew that he would have to deal until something else was figured out. He knew he’d have to adjust to living in his house that he’d had built for him before. It wasn’t made for how he was now.
“How about you just drag me up the steps and if I need to get down, I just slide or roll, either way,” Kevin suggested.
Anna started to laugh at his idea, “You’re really funny,” she said, not realizing that he wasn’t trying to be.
“I’m serious,” Kevin told her with a straight face, “How much more damage could I do?”
Anna rolled her eyes, “Kevin, just deal with living downstairs for now.” She told him, “I know it’s our house and you want to be able to do what you want, but remember why I came here?”
How could he forget? With a sigh, Kevin wheeled right past Anna and into the downstairs guest room, shutting the door behind him. He was tired and not in the mood to be bothered. Maybe after a few hours of rest, he would feel differently. In the meantime, Anna could give herself a tour of her new home.
Jaime wished that the doctor would just hurry up. She and A.J. had been in the waiting room for over an hour and she’d gone through three issues of People and one of Cosmopolitan. She was sick of reading and taking relationship quizzes. To be honest, she as slightly nervous about the appointment. For some reason, she feared that the doctor would find something to be wrong with her. She blamed A.J. for getting her all worked up.
“Would you quit fidgeting?” A.J. laughed, “I thought that you were sure that nothing is wrong.”
“I am,” Jaime quickly answered.
A.J. grabbed her hand comfortingly and gently rubbed it with his fingers. He was getting impatient with the doctor too. Then again, he didn’t know what he expected. Every time he’d gone to see the man, he was running behind schedule.
A.J. watched the minute hand on the clock tick by slowly. He wished that they would hurry. Then again, he wished he would have taken Jaime’s word for it and known that she was okay. If this behavior was normal, then why couldn’t he accept it? He figured that it was because he cared about her and was worried. He was just working himself up, and probably for no reason.
Finally, after another drawn out forty minutes, a receptionist called Jaime’s name. Standing up, she looked at A.J. expectantly.
“Would you like me to go with you?” he asked her with a warm smile.
Jaime nodded, gazing into his chocolate eyes. She couldn’t get enough of them. They were so soft and warm. A.J. stood up and took her hand. Together, they walked into the doctors’ office.
“Please step onto he scale,” the woman instructed.
Jaime did as she was told as she was weighed and measured. The woman wrote some things down on a clipboard and led Jaime into a small room. A.J. took a seat in one of the chairs while Jaime hopped up onto the examining table. The nurse took her blood pressure and wrote more notes down.
“The doctor will be with you shortly,” she replied in monotone, and walked out of the room closing the door behind her.
“Friendly woman,” Jaime said sarcastically.
“Yeah,” A.J. replied, “She’s been here awhile. Hasn’t changed a bit.”
Jaime snorted. She wondered how the lady kept her job with her sour attitude. It amazed her how some people kept their professions.
“So,” A.J. said, “I guess Kev and Anna got back today.”
Jaime nodded, “I guess so. Kev is really depressed,” she said, stating the obvious, “I hope that it doesn’t last long.”
A.J. shrugged, “I don’t know if it will or not. I’ve personally never seen him like this before. It’s scaring me. We’re used to him taking charge. It’s just, odd having Brian be the one that does everything official,”
Jaime figured that it would be. Change was always awkward. She shivered slightly. She’d always hated doctors’ offices. They were always so cold and smelled like medicine. Sometimes, they were worse than hospitals because the space was small and confined compared to large and spread out.
Minutes later, a short balding man in his mid forties breezed into the room. He looked at Jaime, and then to A.J.
“How ya been?” he asked informally.
“All right,” A.J. replied, shaking the hand that had been thrust into his face, “Back home for a break.”
The doctor nodded, turning to Jaime, “I’m Dr. Parker,” he introduced.
“Hi,” she replied softly, intimidated slightly by the overly friendly man. She knew that if Stephanie were there, she would make a comment about him sniffing too much “happy gas”.
“So, what brings you here today,”
Jaime shrugged. She didn’t know what to tell the man since she didn’t see that there was a problem. A.J. took no time to jump in though when he could see that his girlfriend obviously wasn’t going to speak for herself.
“She’s had an enourmously encreased appetite,” he began, “She feels sick a lot, and takes asprin all day.”
Dr. Parker raised his eyes from his clipboard with one eyebrow raised slightly above the other. A.J saw the look and scolded himself for his poor usage of working.
“The recommended dosage every six hours,” he corrected himself, “But its been going on for a month or so. She’s moody and has missed at least two periods.” He finished off bluntly.
Jaime blushed slightly at A.J’s sharing of her personal details, “Missing is normal for me,” she told him, “It has been for years.”
“But everything else,” A.J. started to say.
“Are signs of getting a period,” Jaime completed his sentence, and then turned to the doctor, “We’re sorry for wasting your time. My boyfriend is just being paranoid. He’ll feel foolish in a few days.”
“Actually,” Dr Parker interrupted, “I’d like to run a few quick tests. The results will be ready in ten minutes.”
He handed her a cup, “I’m going to need a urine sample.”
Jaime hopped off of the table with shaking hands, her eyes wide with fright. She didn’t know why the doctor was suddenly so serious, but she knew that it must be more than what she thought. She was instructed to the bathroom, where she returned from less than a minute later, handing the doctor her bottle of pee, a b lank look in her eyes. Dr. Parker took it and left, telling them that he would return with the results soon.
“What do you think is wrong with me?” Jaime whispered, tears forming in her eyes, looking to A.J. for consolance.
A.J. motioned for her to come to him and she walked over, sitting in his lap. A.J. stroked her hair, kissing her forehead. She laid he head on his shoulder, not wanting to act like a baby, but she was truly afraid.
“I don’t know,” he told her honestly, “But we’re going to find out, and whatever it is, I’m going to be here for you and take care of you through it all.”
A.J. was trying hard not to show Jaime that he too, was worried. He had to stay strong for her during her weak moment.
“Aren’t you glad that I made you come now?” he asked her.
He could feel Jaime’s head nodding on his shoulder as he stroked her head, raking is fingers through her hair comfortingly.
The ten minutes that Dr. Parker was gone seemed like hours. Jaime dreaded knowing what was wrong, but knew when the doctor came through the door with his clipboard in hand, that it was time to find out. She sat up straight in A.J’s lap, wiping the tears away, trying to compose herself.
“Well, the test results prove what I suspected.” Dr. Parker started off saying.
“Am I going to die,” Jaime asked.
Dr. Parker broke out in to laughter, “No, nothing like that,” he told her, his eyes crinkling around the outer corners.
“Then what’s wrong with my girlfriend?” A.J. demanded, “Is it serious?”
“No, I wouldn’t exactly say that,” Dr. Parker replied, looking thoughtful, looking the nervous couple straight in the eye, “Jaime, you are about two months pregnant.”
Jaime’s eyes widened and she could feel A.J’s grip tightening around her a little. She didn’t know what to think of the news. She found it to be impossible.
“I…I can’t be pregnant,” she said, “I’m still a vir…” and then stopped her self, finishing lamely, “gin,” she whipped her head around to face A.J., “It couldn’t have happened that one time at the hotel, could it? That is the only time I’ve ever had sex, and we haven’t done it since then.”
“Very possible,” the doctor said, answering her question, “Congratulations.”
A startled look appeared on her face, but soon a huge smile broke out. She couldn’t he happier. A slow, unsure, lopsided grin came to A.J.s face as well. He hugged Jaime close to him.
“I’m going to be a father,” he whispered in her ear, “With the most amazing woman in the world.”
Stephanie woke up to sunshine pouring through the windows of her new home. Stretching, she looked around. She was lying on white, silk sheets and a white bedspread overtop of her. It took her a moment to realize that she was living in Nick’s home now. Her home. She could definitely get used to living like royalty. Crawling out of bed, she wondered if she had actually slept the entire night through. She had been better about that lately, but still wasn’t getting her eight hours rest.
Stephanie padded through the room and across the hall into Nick’s home theatre knowing that she would find him there playing one of his game consoles. She was right. He was sitting in a huge sofa playing a football came on his huge one-hundred seventy-two inch TV screen.
“Goodmorning, dear,” she greeted, laughing when she saw he jumped a little. He quickly paused his game and turned around. Stephanie took that as an inventation to join him. She walked over and sat down next to him, cuddling into his side.
“Did you sleep well?” Nick asked.
Stephanie nodded, “Uh huh. I can’t remember the last time I slept so peacefully. I love your bed.”
“So do I,” Nick said with a laugh, “What do you think of my home? Good, average, horrible?”
Stephanie laughed at him, “What are you going to do if I say I hate it?” she asked him with a wink.
“Sell the place and let you pick out something that you’ll be happy with,” he answered with total honesty.
“Well, I think it’s above average,” she told him, “I love it.”
Stephanie laid her head on Nick’s hard chest, snickering a little at something that had just come to her mind. Nick pulled away and looked into her eyes, trying to read her thoughts.
“What?” he asked, when he gave up, knowing that he couldn’t.
“Well, we’re dating now, right?” She asked.
“For two months now,” he answered her.
“You’re going to have to get over not letting anybody see you shirtless,” she told him, “If I’m going to be your woman, than I wanna see the whole package.”
“You will,” Nick assured her, “Don’t worry. I’m just…really paranoid about people seeing me.”
“Why?” Stephanie asked incredulously.
A slight blush arose on Nick’s cheeks. He didn’t know how he was going to answer her question without sounding like a complete idiot. He looked into her eyes and cringed. He knew that look. It meant that she was expecting an answer from him right then and there.
“I have pudge,” Nick finally told her and she burst out laughing, “It’s not funny.” He said in defense.
“What pudge,” she asked, “You are hot. Believe it or not, you have a rather nice body.” She told him, “And I would like to see it this morning.”
Stephanie got up off of the couch and started to walk away. Nick held his arms out, wanting her to come back. He stuck his lip out when she didn’t, pouting slightly that he wasn’t going to get his way.
“Where are you going?” he asked her sadly.
“To the pool,” she answered, “I’ll be waiting for you. When you show up, it better be in nothing but bathing trunks.”
Stephanie left the room, disappearing from view. Nick sighed, knowing that she was going to get her way.
The Boys sang into the large microphones, closing their eyes, singing from their hearts in the chorus of one of their new singles that would be on their new album. When Kevin’s solo came up, he sang with all that he had in him. He was tired and not in the mood that day. He knew that it was a horrible mindset to be in on the first day of recording. He stopped short when someone on the other side of the glass room was hand motioning for him to.
“What’s with you today?” Brian asked, turning to his cousin, “We’re in the recording studio…not singing in the shower.”
“For real,” Nick chimed in, “You sound like you have no soul at all. You sound monotone and dry. If we put this album out, it will be shit.”
“Thank you, Nick.” Kevin replied sarcastically, “I’m doing my best, okay.”
And to him, he was. He’d been home for a week, barely left his house, and was getting discouraged. He’d called the therapist and he came by every day for two hours to work with Kevin. He still wasn’t progressing.
“Come on,” Howie said, “Pull it together. We want to sound harmonious. Even during our chorus, you sound bland. Thank god for Nick’s voice standing out.”
“He’s right,” A.J. joined in, knowing that this was his chance to pick on Kevin. If everybody else was, then it wouldn’t be obvious that he was still on bad terms with him, “You normally sound great, but this new album ain’t gonna happen if you’re sounding like a dead beat. Wasn’t it your idea in the first place to start recording, since you refuse to tour like that?”
Kevin nodded, “I get the picture, guys,” he replied, “I’ll try harder, okay?”
All four men nodded in satisfaction and Brian gave the man thumbs up. In seconds, Kevin began singing his solo again. He tried to sing from his heart, but it just wasn’t coming from there. Instead, it was coming from an empty place inside of him. He even admitted that he sounded awful. It was just something else that he was losing his touch on. It wasn’t enough that he couldn’t walk, but he couldn’t even sing now either. He was cut short again, interrupted and cut short.
“You’re not hitting those notes low enough,” a voice came over the intercom, “Concentrate, Kevin.”
Kevin rolled his eyes, burring his hands in his arms. The thing was, he couldn’t concentrate. All that was on his mind was how he used to be. If it were back then, he was pretty sure that their singing would be almost flawless. The thing was, he was sure also that he would be picking up any of the others mistakes and pointing them out. They were at least getting a break from that.
“You know what?” Brian stated, “How about we wrap up for today. We’ve all worked fairly hard and maybe next time, all five of us will be in the right mindset to do this. It’s just not going to work unless we all are.”
“But the more we work, the sooner it will get done,” Nick whined.
Brian cast Nick a warning look and he quickly shut up. It wouldn’t do any good to keep recording all day if they wouldn’t even use any of the material that they’d worked on. Everybody agreed that waiting until another date and seeing how things went was the best idea anyways. As they were packing up their things, A.J. decided that it was the perfect opportunity to tell everybody his news.
“Hey,” he began, “You’ll never guess what I found out last week.”
“What?” Howie asked.
“Well, Jaime went to the doctor, and it turns out that she is pregnant.”
He got four blank, startled stares. He couldn’t tell if his friends were happy for him or upset. Nick was the first to speak.
“What are you going to do?” he asked, “I mean, aren’t you guys dating? And she is pregnant? She’s been sleeping around behind your back.”
Nick got dumbfounded stares from eight eyes and he wondered what he had said wrong. He always wondered why he got the look.
“I’m the father, Nick,” A.J. told him slowly, “It is my child.”
“Ohhh,” Nick replied, and A.J. rolled his eyes.
“She’s two months along,”
“Well, congratulations,” Brian said with a grin.
“We’re all happy for you both,” Howie said.
Kevin didn’t say anything. He was happy for A.J, despite the way he’d been treating him, yet he was jealous and upset. He and Anna weren’t even dating, yet even if they were, and they decided that they wanted to have kids, her getting pregnant from him would be impossible until, or unless he would walk again. Since he was paralyzed from the waist down, he couldn’t exactly get it up. He was impotent. Kevin quickly spun his chair around and wheeled himself out of the room before any of them could see the tears that were falling from his eyes