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Chapter 36

"Umm...look next to the bookshelf."

"You should give it to me Amby, you've never played this play station."

"Yes I have...once." Brian and Nick started playing a game that looked like it could go on forever so Caitlin and Amber went upstairs for some good old fashion girl talk.

"Ok tell me what's wrong?" Caitlin asked as soon as Amber's bedroom door close and she sat down on the bed.

"Nothings wrong Cate." Amber sat next to Caitlin.

"Whatever it is you know you can tell me, I won't tell, I cross me heart." Caitlin smiled and crossed her heart with her right pointer finger. Amber smiled. She had only known Caitlin for a few days and all ready she felt like she had a very close friend...that was what she needed at the moment. When she was little she use to tell Krista all her problems but that was imposable now because Krista was the problem. A.j flashed in her mind and her frown turned into a bright smile. He could always do that to her, make her feel like she was on top on the world.

"I know that look." Caitlin smiled. "Someone's in love." She said in a singsong voice.

"Yeah, I guess I am." Amber smiled.

"I don't see why not? Brian is a great guy!" Amber's smile fell.

"What? Did I say something wrong? I'm sorry." Caitlin's eyes filled with concern for her friend.

"No. Don't be."

"Amber...

"Caitlin...is...is it possible to love two people at the same time? I mean what if you think you've found the one you tough you wanted to spend your life with but it all came a the worst fucking timing in the world? What if another guy comes into the picture but you’re to blind to see it and he when you do it's to late?" Amber said all in one breath. Caitlin just sat there and looked at her. "Never mind."

"Who else are you in love with Amber? Does he know?"

"Of course not! If he did we would be having a completely different conversation!" Amber snapped. "Look, I'm sorry for just coming out and snapping at you, these are my problems, my worries alone." Amber finished the last part in a mutter.

"Your wrong you know? Your problem is my problem; your worries are my worry, that’s what friends do. I'm here to help you Amber. I would never turn my back on a dear friend. I just hope you feel the same way. I consider you to be my best friend."

"Your my best friend to. Caitlin, you don't know how long I've wanted to tell someone that but I just tried to hid it ya know? That way no one would know and no one would get hurt. But all alone I've just been hurting myself. I care for Brian, I really do, it's just my heart longs for A.j, for his kiss' that softly melt my heart, his touch that sends my skin a blaze, he voice...so soft and soothing." Amber's face once again lit up as she talked about A.j, her passion, her love, and her desire.

"Wow."

"What?"

"You've got it bad."

"I know, but I never meant for this to happen."

"None of us do Amber, we just do."

"Love comes at the right place but the wrong time. I mean why do I all of a sudden feel this way for A.j? I could just be fooling myself or the jealous friend.”

“When did this feeling start?”

“At one of my friends wedding. A.j was there as Krista’s date, we weren’t talking at the time because I had lied to him. Anyway we made up and when we did it just happened…I fell for him and in the worst way. When he looked me in the eyes I knew. I wanted so badly to kiss him at that moment but I didn’t. I just dismissed it like I had done so many other times. But I can’t do that anymore Cate, but I have to.”

“Why? Why can’t you just tell him?” Caitlin asked.

“If only it was that easy, I would have done it a long time ago. He has Krista and I have Brian. I do love Brian on some level, but when I think of him I don’t see a future with him, I see it with A.j how better else but him? I’ve known him since forever, I think I’ve always loved him; I just was to blind to see love that was right in front of me.”

“Damn girl, your trapped between two. All I can say is you have the straighten out you feelings and quick before its to late.”

“Yeah, I know. But it’s hard to do that when I don’t even know where to start. I don’t want to hurt Brian but in order to do that I have to give up on any chance of a relationship with A.j out the window.”

“What are you gonna do about Brian?” Caitlin asked and Amber sighed.

“I really don’t know, I mean it’s not like I don’t have feelings for him because I do its just….I don’t know.” Amber placed her head in her hands, she felt like crying but the tears just wouldn’t come. “I don’t know what to do Caitlin.” Caitlin gave Amber a warm hug.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be it’s not your fault.” Amber sat up.