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"No,” Nick moaned, his head stuffed into the hotel pillow. He’d flown to Sweden to the recording studio to record the Boys’ next album. Their manager, Rick, continued to bang on Nick’s door.

“God damn it, Carter!! Get your ass out of bed!” Rick yelled. Nick threw the pillow over his head, hoping to get a few more minutes of sleep. It wasn’t happening.

“NICKOLAS!! I’LL GET KEVIN UP HERE!!” Nick shot up. The last person he wanted to deal with was Kevin. The last thing he wanted to deal with was an angry Kevin. Kevin had been very bitchy lately...he usually wasn’t very bitchy at all! They were already late to the studio. That wouldn’t be good.

Nick threw on dark blue jeans and a dark green t-shirt and strode to the bathroom. He ran a comb through his hair and went to his bedroom and slipped into socks and shoes. Nick opened the door and closed it behind him. He made his way 15 stories down to the banquet room.

“Hey, there you are!” Brian said and offered him a seat at his table. “Saved you a seat.” Nick just nodded and sat down with his head down. Brian looked at his friend quizzically. Nick felt Brian’s staring and looked up slightly.

“What?” Nick asked.

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked. He was met with a shrug. “Let’s play 20 Questions.” Nick shrugged again.

Brian began with, “Your love life stinks?” Nick nodded.

“At the moment, anyways,” Nick said. Brian nodded.

“No girlfriend?” Brian laughed. Nick was silent for a moment. He should tell Brian. He deserved to know. How would Brian react when Nick admitted his homosexuality? He was sure Brian would be okay with it, but he couldn’t help but be nervous.

“Can I talk to you alone after we get done recording today?” Nick asked his brother anxiously. Brian raised an eyebrow.

“Sure, bro, what’s going on?” Brian asked. Now this had him concerned.

“I need to tell you something but you can’t tell anybody else,” Nick whispered. Brian nodded, his face unmoving from the worried expression it held. He leaned forward towards Nick.

“You know I wouldn’t tell anybody. I promise,” he answered softly. Nick smiled slightly. The manager then yelled that they needed to get to the studio.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Ten hours later, recording was finished without incident. That was highly unusual, which was probably due to Nick being lifeless. That was the way it had been for the past two weeks of recording.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Brian settled down in a chair next to Nick’s bed. He watched the younger man strip down to his boxers and climb into bed, cuddling up under the blankets and comforter. It was nearly midnight.

“What’s going on?” Brian asked Nick. Nick looked up at him. Brian pulled the chair up next to the bed so he could get a better look at him. There was a lovesick look in Nick’s blue eyes.....a look that told him that he was missing his lover. A tear that had pooled in the corner of Nick’s eye fell over his nose as he moved to sit up.

Nick wiped the tear away and looked into Brian’s eyes. They were so blue, and they reminded him of Alex’s.

“I miss Alex,” Nick whispered softly. His voice was barely audible.

“Is Alex your girlfriend?” Brian asked. Nick wanted to laugh and scream, ‘I’m gay, you idiot!’ but refrained from doing so.

“That’s what I need to talk to you about.”

“Did you guys break up?” Again, Nick felt himself trying to scream, ‘No, you idiot, I’m GAY!’ Again, he refrained from doing so.

“No,” he said, stronger, his voice cracking. “Just let me get this out.”

“Okay,” Brian answered. He saw Nick take in a deep breath.

“I’m.....”

Brian looked at his friend expectantly. Nick took in another deep breath through his nose, held it a couple seconds, and exhaled quickly though his mouth.

“Never mind.” Brian’s shoulder’s sagged. Why was Nick being so difficult?

“What’s going on?” he asked the younger man. Nick shrugged.

“I don’t know if I’m ready to tell you yet...” Nick answered. Brian nodded.

“Hey. Just come to me in your own time. Whatever it is, I’m sure it’ll work out,” he said.