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Chapter 3: A friend on the edge


AJ was sitting on his bed and couldn’t decide whether he should get a little sleep till he had to be at the meeting or if he should just watch TV instead.

He was still thinking about the happenings of this morning. He was about to see if Brian was up when Nick came in and asked him if he would spent the free noon joining him on the beach. They talked about it when they realized that they were running late. So AJ had all forgotten about Brian.
Inside the van on their way he had remembered and asked Kevin where Brian was.

************************Flashback*******************************************

“Hey Kev, where´s Brian?” he asked

“I don´t know. You know, I stopped watching his ass some time ago” Kevin snapped.

“Whoa, calm down, I was just asking. He usually isn´t late as you know” he tried to make up for his friend.

“He´s late since Leighanne and Baylee joining all the time” Nick spoke up.

“Well, he cares about them”

“He should care more about this group. He does shit for the group. Howie and I doing all the work with the press and you and Nick care for the live performances” Kevin stated.

“He´s doing all the music stuff like getting the band ready before the show, checking the sound and stuff” AJ replied.

“Yeah right” Kevin was pissed, everybody could tell that.

*************************End of Flashback************************************

Something was up with Kevin and Nick. Even Howie seemed to be constantly pissed at Brian. It was true, Brian did only what was necessary for the group, but whatever he did, he did it at 100%.

He´s got a family now. We should be happy that he decided to get back to the group and back on the road. AJ knew that Brian had a long battle with himself to come back. He wanted to see his son grow up some more, he wanted to release this Christian CD he had almost finished. Brian nowadays had a full schedule even without being a Backstreet Boy.

AJ envied Brian a little bit for his perfect family life. He wished to have something like that in the future. He had spent a lot of time with Brian and Leighanne during the break. They always had a room for him and time for talking. He absolutely loved Baylee. He had spent hours just playing with the little guy. And he loved to have Bay and Leigh around on the tour.

And he had grown close to Brian. Very close. He never had been so close to one of the others. Even not Howie. Years ago he had liked Brian, but not his way of life. He never understood how somebody who was cool and active like Brian could prefer spending his evenings in a hotel room playing stupid video games with Nick or watching TV or stuff instead of going clubbing with Howie, Kevin and himself.

He had understood Brian´s way of living during his therapy. He understood that Brian did a lot of things just for Nick, who else would have had to stay alone in his room. He had helped the youngest of them through his homesickness and the problems with his family.

Brian never had any trouble with the police, unlike him and Nick. He even never had real bad press. Unlike everyone of them.

He had realized a lot of things during his therapies and the long talks to Brian.

*****************************Flashback**************************************

“Thanks for letting me stay again” he said.

“Hey, no problem. You´re welcome every time as you know pretty well” Brian smiled putting an arm around his shoulders.

“I´m sure you would prefer having some private time with Leigh and Baylee. He´s so cute”he had to smile at the thought of his “nephew”.

“He loves you. He keeps asking me about `cle A-taj´ all the time. He would be pretty angry with me if I wouldn´t let you come around. By the way, I also do love to have you around. I like to see how much you have changed for the better. I like to be proud about my little brother” Brian said seriously.

There was a short break.

“You earned this man. You lived a pretty good live always. You have been through a lot and I´m happy that you were the first be become a father you know. You deserved it the most. I´m gonna have a family one my own sometime in the future. But I will have to wait some more time. But I now know this time will come” he had wanted to say this out lout for so long.

“You´ll make a great father and husband. I´m sure” Brian said.

“I have a good example to learn from” he replied.

************************End of Flashback*************************************

It was true. Brian had helped him a lot and just by letting him stay at his house and joining his little family had showed him, what everything was worth for.

One the other hand, he had just gotten back a little trust from Kevin, Nick and Howie. They also had forgiven him. What if he was now again spoiling everything by telling Brian that it was totally okay to spent most of his time with the family. Maybe for now he should just stay silent and see how it would go on.

AJ finally decided to go watch some TV.

“Man, this is fucked up” he said out loud.

Maybe he should call his mother to talk about everything. He decided against it when he saw that there was a live performance of Gwen Stefanie on TRL.