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Part Two

Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door

He pulled into a Seven Eleven and stopped the car. He couldn’t afford Ownerman’s Lounge unless he had a couple hundred dollars. There was no wine under $50 and no meal under $15. He wasn’t a bad person. He was just tired of living in complete poverty. He needed a new car where he didn’t hold his breath as he drove hoping the brakes wouldn’t give out or the engine didn’t die. He needed a new apartment where cockroaches didn’t share his dinner and the couple next to him didn’t scream all night and the world didn’t revolve around their sleeping patterns. It was a hard, cold, bitter feeling of hopelessness. He remembered how he’d been young and adults and family smiled as he beemed of how he would be a famous singer or doctor. They would hug and smother him with love and encourage him. He remembered as if yesterday how he tried that drug and then the rest of his life fell like dominos. He was arrested and the scholarships flew from his fingertips as fast as he had inhaled the drug. He knew he shouldn’t have resorted to false violence but he just wanted to feel as he had felt when he was so young. He wanted to feel that false hope that sang everything would be alright for right now. Everything would be fine.

So when he threatened the clerk that stood there, he threatened him and scared him with the anger and pain inside of his broken, bruised soul.

He yelled this time, and the guy shoved the money in a plastic bag and shoved it to him. He walked out quickly with his head down and jumped in his car. He drove calmly from the lot and began his way toward the nearest park. He needed time to think. He needed time to calm down.

Driving to the park took twenty minutes and he wasted no time starting to the bridge. He starred down at the black water which flowed slowly over small rocks and plant life. He’d occasionally hear something scurry into a bush or splash across the water. He closed his eyes.

Everything was wrong. Everything wasn’t fair. There wasn’t one good soul left in the world. The motto was do what you have to, to get where you have to because it will be and forever be every man or woman for his or her self. Bullshit about marriage and love. Bullshit about family and friends…at least for his life. Nothing had worked after he had just tried that drug. Nothing had worked. The scholarships went away and the disappointments began. His mother favored his little brother and he could never live up to father’s sudden harsh expectations. He had finally had it. Begging for his scholarship back had been a waste, pleading silently with his father for forgiveness of not being like him was ignored and his mother just never really went back to loving him like she did. They were a Catholic family. They lived in a nice big brick house with money. They had expectations to live up to and when it wasn’t met, you were shunned.

He drove thirty minutes to the Ownerman’s Lounge and arrived five minutes before they were scheduled to meet. He stuffed two hundred into his pocket and had parked the car a block away. He walked through the cold wind with his small army green jacket that was too small for his arms but he rolled them to his elbows so it looked somewhat stylish. He had shedded his black jacket into the car so incase they saw the surveillance tapes of someone with a black jacket, no one would suspect him. He ripped the knees of his jeans quickly and he was finished with his disguise.

She came in and looked beautiful in a baggy vanilla sweater and tight blue jeans that flared widely to cover her small feet. After he ordered a wine that they both agreed upon he smiled at her. She returned the gesture.

“So, what’s your name mystery beauty?” he grinned widely.

“Miesha Summar. Yours?” she questioned as the waiter came and poured the wine for both then set the bottle on the table. He nodded to him and he left.

“Alexander McLean.” He said, “But you can call me A.J.”

“Well A.J., you look nice tonight.” She sipped her wine slowly.

“But you look lovely.” She laughed.

“What do you want out of life? What type of man are you looking for?”

“A guy with financial status man. I’m not trying to remain stuck forever in that stupid little shop like my sisters and brother. It’s so boring and it drags. I want someone who I can love and who loves me back. I want someone financially stable.” He nodded as he gulped wine down.

“What’s your profession?”

He smiled softly, “I’m a doctor.” He replied. She smiled shortly while nodding.

“And guess what I am?” she sighed.

“Must be fun.” He said, “Looks like you work for your family?”

“Yeah,” she placed her glass down, “I do. And I hate it.” She sipped her wine, “Can I just run away with you?”

“Sure.” He laughed. The waiter came back and they ordered.

“So, just tell me about life.” He said and she nodded.

“I don’t get paid enough and it makes me so so mad. I just want to rob a bank sometimes before I get crap for money. They still pay me like I’m getting allowance. I hate it. Six dollars an hour is not a damn paycheck.” She growled. He nodded. He got nothing an hour. No one even wanted to hire him.

“What about yours?” He explained how his parents and family didn’t love him

“I don’t like talking about it. There’s just nothing to talk about. I eat, sleep, and work with the hope of meeting a woman as beautiful and down to earth like you.” She smiled.

“Thank you.” She said, “You, I swear, have the most beautiful brown eyes I’ve ever seen. They’re so rich and striking.” He smiled as the food was set down in from of them after twenty minutes.

“I want to know you more. Tell me deep down inside what your fears are. I know we just met but I feel such a strong connection to you.” he asked. She stopped eating. She sipped some wine and leaned back in her chair with her arms crossed across her small chest.

“The real truth about me is I was raped when I was thirteen by my boyfriend. I beat him up so bad they couldn’t recognize him with a bat. I was put in juve for five years and then they let me go. He never got any sentence for raping me. I was then forced to stay in the house by my parents even though I was eighteen. They screamed and yelled and sometimes got violent so I hate them and I’m scared of what they’ll do if I leave…now you.”