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Chapter 41

Chapter 41

            “Why didn’t you tell me?” Alex asked softly as he and Annie settled down onto the couch after Nick and Andrea had left to go back to their suite.

            “About the baby or about going off my pills?” Annie asked meekly, still fearing what she had to tell him.

            “Both, I guess.”

            Annie took a deep breath and took Alex’s hands in her own. “Even though you may hate me when I finished, there is something you should know,” she began, trying to decide if she could look him in the eyes or if she should just continue looking at his hands as she had been doing.

            “Annie, look at me,” he instructed, making her decision for her. “Whatever you have to say to me could not possibly be worse than me kissing Andrea.” Annie nodded in agreement, even though she was not so sure he was right.

            “I didn’t tell you about going off of the birth control because I knew you would want to use condoms or some other form of prevention and I didn’t want that.” She broke the gaze with him and turned her head away, trying to keep the nauseated feeling that was overwhelming her at bay. She took a few more deep breaths, exhaling slowly as if hoping to cleanse her body of all the “bad air” that was milling her over inside.

            “I didn’t realize that you wanted to have kids right now,” he responded flatly, knowing there was more to her story than she was telling him.

            “I don’t, or I didn’t, I--” she stumbled, finding herself at a loss for words to explain herself. There’s no point in sugarcoating this, she told herself with contempt. “I knew about your ‘dilemma’ with Andrea; I overheard you talking to Steph on the phone the day you were telling her about your urges to drink. I was afraid that if you got a shot at Andrea you would realize that you wanted to be with her instead of me and I needed a way to hold on to you. When I didn’t think I would actually get pregnant I asked you to push up the wedding, figuring that if I could get you through the ceremony that you wouldn’t abandon me once we were married. When I went to doctor for my re-check the other day I found out about the pregnancy. I didn’t actually think it would happen but I was so happy, I thought that I had found my way to keep you.”

            AJ sat there, unable to move, his mind reeling with various thoughts, ranging from anger to distrust to excitement to disbelief. She trapped me, he thought to himself bitterly. Annie saw the scornful expression come across his face and it made her shudder. She got up off the couch and walked across the room to window. She ran her hands up and down her arms, rubbing them as if trying to warm herself as she stared out the window into the stone cold night.

            As he sat there on the couch thinking horrible thoughts about the woman carrying his baby, he watched her. He watched her shiver like the coldness on the other side of that window had come through to catch her, he watched her quickly wipe away the tears that would fall from her eyes every few seconds, and he watched her as she placed her hand on her stomach and whispered sentences to the child inside. His bitterness and disdain started to fade away, only to be replaced by guilt for his actions and acceptance for hers. I left her few other options, he admitted to himself as he continued to watch her. If I had been completely committed to her she would never have felt so desperate.

            When Annie looked back at the man she loved so much, she noticed the expression he was donning had changed. “What are you thinking? I need to know.”

            He stood up and walked towards her, his hands getting clammy and his pulse starting to race. When he was standing right in front of her, he lifted his hand up to her face quickly, causing her to move her head hastily in a defensive motion. “I’m not going to hit you,” he coaxed softly; shocked that she would even think that. “I would never do that.”

            “I know, but it’s not like I don’t deserve it.”

            He shook his head in disagreement and raised his hand up to her face again, sweeping his fingers through her luscious reddish brown locks as he had intended to do before. He let his fingers comb down from her temple to the end of her hair and when there was nothing else for his fingers to caress, he placed his hand on the middle of her back and ran it down her body. When he reached the small of her back he traced her waistline with his index finger around to her belly button.

            “I’m sorry Annie,” he said as he placed his hand palm down onto her stomach. “You did try and trap me, but I didn’t leave you with too many other options. I should have never put you in this position.”

            “I’m sorry too. I should have just confronted you about this whole thing instead of doing what I did.” She put her hand on top of his and leaned forward so that her head was pressing against his chest.

            He stroked the back of her hair with his free hand and continued to rest his other hand on her stomach. “We have a lot to work through together,” he started as he kissed her on the top of the head. “But I do know that I love you and I do know I want to marry you.” He stopped rubbing her head and used his hand to lift her chin up so she was looking at him. He kissed her passionately, never moving his other hand from her stomach. “And I do know I am happy we are having this baby.”

            She pulled back from him, almost as if she were afraid of what he just said. “Are you serious?” she asked cautiously, not wanting to get her hopes up and uncertain if he would change his mind.

            He pulled her back into him and turned her around so that her back was pressed against his front. He wrapped both arms around her and rested his hands on her stomach, rubbing up and down slowly. “Without a doubt,” he simply said.

            Annie turned back around so she was facing him. She looked him in the eyes as she spoke, “Promise me from this moment on that we will only look forward, never back. No, we can’t just forget about the past month or what happened tonight, but I want to deal with it and move on. No going back to it and no dwelling on it, for either of us. We both acted erroneously, and what you did was no worse than what I did and vice versa.”

            Alex nodded in agreement, but a troubled look came over his face as he did so. “What are we going to do about the wedding?”

            “I guess that depends on where you and Nick stand. I don’t want to wait any longer to marry you, and I don’t think that anybody that doesn’t know right now about what happened tonight needs to know. If he doesn’t want to be a part of our lives anymore, then we will deal with it, but there is no point in postponing the wedding and giving everyone on the guest list worked up and wondering if we are having problems.

            “True, but won’t people already be suspicious if he isn’t my best man and Andrea isn’t there?”

            “Andrea will be there, but it may cause a rift between her and Nick. I think you need to talk to him and smooth things over. He does have a really good reason for being so pissed at you, you can’t deny him that. Just work it out, you need to. Your friendship is not the only thing binding you two together my sexy Backstreet Boy.” She gave him a playful smile and swatted him on the butt.

            “You know you love it,” he played back as he walked over the phone and picked up the receiver. He dialed room 513 and listed to it ring twice. Before anyone answered he hung up the phone. “I’m just going to go down there, you coming?”

            Annie grabbed a room key and they walked out the door and down the hallway to Nick and Andrea’s suite. AJ knocked on the door and heard footsteps approaching.

            “What do you want?” an angry voice asked.

            “Nick, we need to talk. Can we come in?”

            “She can, you can’t,” he responded childishly pointing to Annie and then to AJ.

            “Nick, please,” Annie pleaded, stepping into the conversation. “You know you have to deal with this and since the night is pretty much ruined for all of us anyway, it might as well be dealt with tonight.” She stepped inside the hotel room before Nick could respond or shut the door in her face. She walked into the bedroom where Andrea was sitting on the bed and starting talking to her, leaving the two boys by themselves at the door.

            “Are you sure it’s a good idea to leave them there alone?” Andrea asked half cautiously and half jokingly.

            “They are big boys, they can work it out,” Annie responded smiling. I’m so glad I haven’t lost this part of my life, she thought to herself and she and her cousin laughed and joked together as they had done so many times before.

            “How did things go with Alex?” Andrea asked once the laughter had died down. “It appears to have went well,” she continued, noticing the engagement ring back on her cousin’s left hand.

 

            “Yeah…” she said as she looked at her ring. Annie had taken it off after she saw Alex kissing Andrea and was not sure she would ever put it back on. “We are still planning on keeping the wedding scheduled for next week. I hope you will be there to celebrate with me.”

            “Of course I will. And I know you and Alex are worried about it right now, but Nick will be there too, I promise you that. He loves Alex too much to miss out on it, and he loves him too much to keep up this angry fight much longer. Those two are like spaghetti and meatballs, one without the other just isn’t the same and they both know it.”

            “I hope you’re right,” said Annie as she walked over the door and peaked into the living room at her fiancé and her brother in law, which is how she referred to Nick for all intents and purposes. “Andrea, come here, quick!” she screeched and she waved her hand for Andrea to come over by her.

            Andrea peered through the crack in the door to see what Annie was so enthralled with. “Awww, I knew they would work it out,” Andrea said with a big smile on her face. Now all I have to work out is getting these feelings about AJ out of my head. Damn that man for opening this can of worms.