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Chapter 23

Nick felt numb.
All this time, for weeks, they had been searching high and low, and just like that, with one simple word they were closer to the core than they had ever been.

A hatch…

He sat down on the snow covered side walk to let it sink in for a moment. Gurgling sounds could be heard from Tara’s body lying on the ground next to him. He felt the urge to confront her again, but knew that the sounds were just waves of life washing over her one last time. Across the street he could see Granger pacing back and forth talking on his cell phone. Nick could clearly hear him, but the words he spoke seemed distant and meaningless. He turned around half way and looked at the barn behind him.

Was she in there?
Could it really be that simple?

He wanted to run inside and find the hatch that they had missed several times, but he couldn’t move. He was scared. Scared beyond belief of what he might find.

Ali. Dead?
Alive?

He had been inside the barn before. Why hadn’t he heard her cry for help?

“Nick?”
Granger was suddenly standing next to him. He had a look on his face that Nick couldn’t quite make out. It was a mixture of sadness, relief, curiosity and nervousness.
“Cody’s on his way, and the ambulance will be here in a few minutes to take away Tara’s body. We’ll be ready to go inside the barn after they’ve been here.”
Nick only nodded his head. He wanted to argue and tell him that they should start looking for Ali right away, that she was depending on them, that she needed him, but he couldn’t. His hands were shaking, his vision seemed blurry and he had no idea what to say or how to react.
“I’m sorry Nick…” Granger sat down next to him and ran his hand across his face. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you when you told me about Tara.”
Nick shrugged.
“We’ll find her buddy.” He patted Nick on the back, a fatherly gesture that made Nick close his eyes and let his thoughts drift away again. He saw his family gather around the dining room table, he saw Aaron as a kid riding a bicycle, him and Brian goofing around backstage, his mom cutting his hair, and himself as he sat there on the cold sidewalk in Siberia.

And then there was Ali.

Memories of her filled his mind and he prayed a silent prayer that she was still ok.

He didn’t know how long he had been sitting there, when he heard several voices surrounding him. He slowly lifted his head and opened his eyes to see Tara’s body being carried away. It was a surreal image. She was lying on a stretcher, a white sheet covering her body, as two paramedics were carrying her down the deserted streets of Tura. Snow was falling to the ground and the blue lights from the ambulance could be seen at the end of the street. It was a sad image, yet all Nick could think about was that he didn’t want to have to see it again as the night went on.

“You ready?” Granger approached him. “The area’s been cleared. The barn is all ours.”
Nick took a deep breath and slowly stood up. Everything around him seemed to be going in slow motion and all he could do was nod. He followed Granger and Cody, who had arrived with the paramedics, into the barn, where searchlights had been set up to shut out the darkness.
“If there’s a hatch, that means we’re probably looking for lose cardboards on the floor.” Granger said as the three men stopped in the middle of the large room. They all looked around for a few seconds, inhaling the scent of old, raw wood.
“We’ll work our way across the room, search every square feet in this building, and be as accurate as possible.”
Nick and Cody nodded as they all spread around the room, checking every inch on the cold floor.

Half an hour later, they still hadn’t found anything, and Nick was starting to feel irritated and anxious. He had been crawling on the floor, knocking on the wooden planks, running his hands across torn nails and pressing his ear against the cold surface to listen for any sounds. Standing up, he ran a hand through his hair and sighed. He wanted to scream, to cry, hit something, do something. Every emotion under the sun was washing over him, and it was driving him mad not knowing what to do about it.

Looking across the room, he spotted the large container in the far corner. Frowning, he moved a little closer to it. It was covering a large amount of floor space.

Could it be?

“Guys.” He said silently, still moving across the floor. “What about the container? Have any of you been looking there?”
Granger and Cody stopped what they were doing and walked up to Nick, both shaking their heads.
“One person alone couldn’t possibly have the strength to move that thing around on his own. It’s too large.” Cody stated as they approached the container.
“But one person can climb into it. The bottom is missing.” Granger was standing on a wooden box looking into the container. “And there’s a hatch.”

Nick felt his heart skip a beat at Grangers words. For a few seconds, he had to lean against the wall behind him as he felt his knees go weak. Before he knew it, Granger had disappeared inside the container, ready to open the hatch.
“Wait!” Nick jerked out of his state of dizziness. He quickly walked over to where Granger had been standing seconds before, and leaned over the edge. Looking down, Granger was now standing next to a hatch. It was quite large, and if it hadn’t been hidden the way it had, they would have spotted it immediately.
“Could I…. you know… Maybe it would be best if I…” Nick muttered. His voice was shaking and he had a hard time focusing.
“Are you sure?” Granger instantly knew what Nick was talking about.
“Yes.” He whispered. “If she’s down there… Even if she’s alive or not, I need to see her. If she’s alive, she needs me. I know she does.”
Granger nodded his head in approval and climbed out of the container to switch places with Nick. Seconds later, Nick found himself next to the hatch. He knew that that particular moment would forever be glued to his mind, and he prayed that it would lead up to something good, and not haunt him as a nightmare.
“Open it.” Granger said, throwing Nick a pair of plastic gloves. Nick knew by then, after weeks of watching the investigation, that he had to wear them to prevent leaving his fingerprints or destroying those that might already be there.
He carefully put on the gloves, struggling a little because his hands were shaking so much.
As soon as the gloves were on, he bent down and carefully opened the hatch by pulling the rusty iron handle. He was almost afraid to look down the hole, but forced himself to do so.
He found himself looking down a narrow staircase. It was obviously very old, and some of the cardboards were missing.

“You want me to come?” Granger asked, seeing Nick’s look of nervousness.
Despite what he was feeling at that moment, Nick shook his head and proceeded to start walking down the stairs.
“We’ll be right here. Call if you need our help, ok? Let us know what you see.”
By then, Nick was already half way down the stairs, feeling his heart beating faster and faster by ever step. As he reached the bottom, he stopped for a moment, taking off the gloves while looking around.

The room was dark, and smelled like old mould. It seemed to Nick, like the room had been dug into the ground, because there were no actual walls or floor. He was standing on the bare ground. He turned around to look behind the stairs, and his heart skipped a beat.
He was looking at a door. It was large and made out of thick wooden planks. Walking closer, he noticed that it was double bolted with two heavy iron plates that were blocking the door to anyone trying to get out from the inside.

For a few seconds, Nick felt like running up the stairs again and get Granger to open it, but a voice told him to stay and do it by himself. He knew he was strong enough physically, but once again, he found that he was scared of what he might find on the other side.
Shaking away his fears, he grabbed a hold on the first iron plate and lifted it up to remove it from the door. It was surprisingly easy, and seconds later, the second one had also been removed.

Nick felt like he was watching himself from the outside as he stood there, looking at the door ready to be opened. He didn’t know why, but he knew what he was about to find on the other side, and it scared him.

This is it…

With all the strength he had left, he pushed the door open and closed his eyes for a few seconds, trying to prepare himself for what he might see.

She was sure she had heard voices, sounds, coming from above. They were faint, but yet, she had heard them. A part of her wondered if she was hallucinating, as she was trying to stay awake, yet she knew what she had heard.

It sounded like him.

But, after a while, they were gone, and she went back to the state where she had been the past few days. It wasn’t until she heard the large wooden door across the room open, that she forced herself back to reality.

He slowly opened his eyes to let them get used to the darkness. Only a small ray of light from the opening above the staircase made its way across the room.

But it was all he needed.

It was all he needed to see what he had been longing for, for so long.
“Ali…” He whispered, as a wave of relief washed over him. He couldn’t believe it. She was really there, right in front of him, looking so fragile and torn that all he wanted to do was protect her and take away her pain.

Their eyes met for the first time in almost a year and a half, and Nick was sure his heart stopped beating for a few seconds.

Time stood still.

For a moment, she thought she was dreaming, but as she heard him whisper her name, she knew he was for real. She wanted to stand up and run over to him, but she was so weak, she couldn’t move a muscle. Only her eyes were able to show him that she had seen him, that she had longed for him, missed him, for so long.

She had waited and waited, cried, screamed, hurt, and there he was, standing right in front of her. Tears filled her eyes as she realized that it was finally over.

He was finally able to move, and with trembling legs, he almost ran across the room to sit down next to her. Falling down on his knees, he felt tears erupting from his eyes. They came so fast that he couldn’t do anything to hold them back, but for the first time, he didn’t want to either. He knew it was time to let go of all the emotions that had been buried in him for so long.

It was finally time to let go.

Carefully, he pulled her into his arms, wanting more than anything to let her know that everything was alright. That he was there to protect her.

”God… Ali.” He whispered while tears were rolling down his cheek.
Her whole body was trembling and he ran his hand through her hair to calm her down while rocking her back and forth.
“Shhh, it ok. I’m here now.”

Nick is here.

Cradling her, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, smelling her and feeling her cold skin against his as she continued to sob.
“I missed you so much…” He whispered between his own sobs.

I missed you too…

She wanted to speak, but she was completely drained from all the emotions that were rushing over her. It was too much for her at that moment, but even though she didn’t say anything, she knew that he knew what she was feeling.

“I’m so sorry I took so long…” He apologized silently, knowing that he was forgiven long before he was even there. He just needed to say it anyways. “I never stopped looking.”
But she already knew.

For what seemed like forever, the two of them just sat there, crying together, feeling nothing and everything at the same time. At that moment, time stood still, and only the sound of two people crying silently, could be heard. For someone unknowingly, looking in, it was the sound of sadness, but to Nick and Ali, it was the sound of a new beginning and a life that was finally complete.