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As she opened the door to the music room, she could hear the laughter of her band mates, the laughter of her friend behind her about a joke, and she could hear herself laugh.

But it wasn’t meant to be a laugh.

It was more of a gasp for breath, something she would do to try to let out the emotions that continued to crumble her self-esteem.

She smiled at her friend as she tried to explain something to her, but she didn’t listen to her, her thoughts were drifting in another world; a darker world where she felt permanently enclosed in.

As she held her instrument and began playing the solemn tune of their piece, she finally felt the music ease her tension within. She felt safe, but the taunting thoughts inside her head still remained.

“I hate myself. People don’t like me, I hate myself.” She thought to herself impulsively.

She didn’t know why she was thinking that way, she thought it was normal, but she didn’t feel normal, she felt like an outcast.

~ ~ ~

As their band session ended, she collected her belongings and quickly tried to leave unnoticed.

But she was stopped by a friend.

“You need some help with your stuff? Are you okay?” her friend asked.

“Shut up.” She replied.

She quickly run down the hallway to her locker as little drops of tears streamed down her eyes unnoticeably. She opened her locker and hastily pulled out her coat and bag. She put on her coat hurriedly and strapped her bag before leaving the building.

As she left the building, she saw her mother’s car parked by the driveway. She immediately entered the car and closed her door.

“How was your day, Hope?” her mother asked her daughter as she turned on the ignition.

“Fine.” She tried to fake a smile.

She was relieved to be out of school, at last.

~ ~ ~

As she entered her room and locked the door, she immediately threw herself in bed, facedown on her fluffy pillow. She wept her heart out.

“Why am I always being left out? Is there something wrong with me?” she thought to herself as she sobbed.

For some reason, she had a negative view of herself. She felt like she didn’t want to go back to school.

As her anxiety attack finally set in, she then whispered a choked plea to the air, to anyone who would hear her, “Help me.”